3:13 honestly, I feel so heard with this. I struggle to explain my identity, and honestly some of the questions I get are too invasive as well. Personally I want to get top surgery, because that makes me feel like myself. Yes, the ‘masculine’ aspect of the surgery will reduce my dysphoria. I just hate that I have to have my identity seen as a debate or “ideology.” I personally don’t align myself with either binary gender. Both norms make me uncomfortable, and I personally hate the assumption that because of my chest being big, I’m assumed to be a cis woman. I’m not cis, and while I know I was assigned female at birth, aspects of women hood people talk about as a “joy” have always deeply made me feel uncomfortable. Like my dysphoria is specific to my voice, and my chest, while the idea of things such as being pregnant or going through pregnancy makes me very suicidal. The idea of it makes me want to rip my womb out. So I really hate the debate around my identity, because it stems from a need to have a social norm or binary. Personally, I wish that shit like that wouldn’t exist. I want both masculine parts and feminine parts, but most of these parts are considered subjective.

Honestly, seeing your videos is so healing. I’ve been wanting to transition for 2-3 years at the minimum, but can’t transition currently due to personal reasons and barriers. That being said, seeing you talk about your experience is really validating, because I remember when I was 16 and wanted to come out to a trans person, he essentially denied my coming out, and that made me go back into the closet until I turned 18. Like even now, I can’t fully transition due to monetary fears, so it’s nice to see people who are open and honest about their own experiences, while not putting others down.

7:10 honestly, as a fellow enby myself; seeing his response makes me think he’s internalizing a lot of his own transphobia. Like… I think that it’s not hard to not make fun of others- but apparently to some people it is 😭

When you say message how would you describe it?

Hey. Please can you be more sepcific in dose usage. Whays regualr whats low. Like is 5mg a day low? 5mg a week? Askkng becasue i was given 5mg pack of gel to do 3 days. I wanna know if this is too low or if i will still change just slower. NB trans masc 49. Thanks

oh wow! you're the only person i've seen mention the comfort in having something on your chest, sort of "wrapping" around you or putting a weight on you. As silly as it sounds, it's a biggie for me and one of the hardest things to consider giving up.

I'm pre t, I'm going to explode I think

The one thing I hesitate on is this idea that we're not inherently flawed. Of course we are. We're all imperfect and ignorant and in a constant process of growth and change. We will never be perfect or have all the answers. And accepting that takes so much pressure off. I think that is what Christianity teaches: that our value does not depend on perfection, or being normal, and that we are loved unconditionally. And it's sad that despite that teaching being 100% fundamental to Christianity, so much of Evangelical culture conditions love and community on compliant behaviour.

Hmmm I'm thinking a bit about whether I want to medically transition or not, this video is really helpful. Some things I want are the fat distribution, I really hate how my waist/hips look, also I think I want a deeper voice because I don't like how it sounds in recordings but I'm not sure if that's a dysphoria thing or self confidence thing. Also I need to find videos of people who share my accent and what their voice sounds like deeper because uh I don't like uncertainty. Also the mood thing is so interesting, I'm not personally worried about that because I'm autistic and have bad emotional regulation + ocd (undiagnosed) where I get violent intrusive thoughts and I'm thinking I could get past that because I have it already, trust me it's not fun but if it comes to it I think I could cope. There are a few things I'm not sure about, although definitely changes I don't want would be bottom growth and hair loss (honestly I would rather have nothing down there genital wise but surgery scares me so I'm thinking I'll leave it, thing is though I have chest dysphoria too and I'm not looking forward to surgery recovery if I end up getting top surgery.) My dysphoria right now is at it's not that bad unless I give it serious thought then I realise I'm deeply uncomfortable in my body.

Thank you so much for making this video. I am a transmasc person who was brought up Church of Christ and unpacking what I was taught has been a very long journey.

Oh my gosh your facial hair looks amazing! I’m on T - regular dose- for 3 months, really excited about my hair lol

Being trans is not a choice!!

I just asked my doc for low dose testosterone today! I also got a referral in for top surgery so I should be getting that in the next year as well! I’m so excited to be more androgynous.

I just booked a top surgery consultation and somehow KZbin was the first to know xD

Two weeks out from my surgery -- thanks for the notes on the sensory stuff!

Great video! Great info! Thank you for sharing!!

Thanks for sharing.

I’m genderfluid and I whenever I do feel masc or nonbinary I rlly want to start T but bc I’m still attached and feel like a woman sometimes I don’t know wether it’s best for me or not.

This video helped me so so much as a non binary person. Thank you!!

oh hey the same thing happened to me that year too!

Thank you so much, it resonates soooo much, I needed to hear this. I'm trans too, and endocrinated myself into spiritual beliefs, in which I've been educated younger by an aunt, and trying hard to escape from it because it's slowing me into my future gender transition which I need badly. I was so deep into thoughts about natural stuffs and sacred feminity and masculinity and that kind of shit, and scared as shit to reach out for the health care I need to stop struggling so bad with gender dysphoria. I'm slowly opening my eyes and giving me the love and healing I deserve. I'm glad to hear someone talking about this, my whole family are into that kind of beliefs, it's like a mini cult or religion actually, and rly hard to get out. I wish you the best, thank you for helping others like me by speaking your truth 🌞 keep on shining

I am always grateful to receive a perspective of POC experiences.. I definitely have taken breaks from researching and learning these things because I get overwhelmed with where I am and feel as though I’m so behind . But thank you for sharing your story and helping me to be more understanding and present in my journey. You are amazing Mav and you deserve to continue loving yourself and celebrating each step in your new life . I am so proud of you ! 🫂🫶🏽

💕

I am a non-binary person taking the first few steps into researching a low dosage of T and just stumbled onto this video!! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with us ☺️☺️

I just started some baby locs 18 days ago, and the majority of them are interlocked. I tried braids and two strand twists, but they wouldn't stay together. Three locs in the back of my head were instant loc'd with the crochet tool I almost injured my fingers with, but they are secure. One hair memory I have: I did a Carefree Curl as a teenager in the early 90's, and unless I kept spraying on that Curl Activator, my hair was dry and crunchy. To the surprise of no one, the kids in school made fun of me for my "rat's nest", and I felt more self-conscious and hate for my hair. My gender feels around hair are, I don't equate hairstyles or hair length with gender. Hair strands have no gender. Society just assigns gender to things for no good reason. And I can't express enough how annoying it is for me to watch black hair care content on KZbin, and the video starts with, "Hey ladies", "hey girls", "hey sis", as if they're entire audience is women, which it is not! I feel so invisible!

It’s a biggest self harming experience or path aka spirituality to go through… it will ruin you, your life, time and health… it’s demonic… regret it a big time after loosing so many things!!! Stick to your religion and values.. we are meant to live a good life not to suffer!!!

You know that's a two way street. I've seen more young adults of the fringe lifestyle reject their parents than the other way around. Love has less to do with this than stubborn control and the "I'm right you're wrong" mentality. Y'all might as well be feuding over which color is the prettiest. In the end after you've painted your house they way you like it, what does it matter?

All queerphobia is reprehensible, but I think Christians being against asexuality is nonsensical since Jesus literally refers to them (while generally commending celibacy) in Matthew 19:11-12

But the light good right

They were like dont go into the light

Ive seen the light body of a person tho

IDK, feels like magic. Some of us really need to hear this. We need this perspective, a very valuable view! 👍🏼

News just in:` the Western world left behind spiritual beliefs and is now scientific, hence the incredible standard of living we all enjoy. `Spirituality` is in the trash of history because it doesn`t help even for a second in the survival of the species.` More breaking news as and when we receive it.

VG start. I'm only a min and a half in but the main point is that spirituality, e.g. non-dual, whilst valid, is quite harmful. Best find what gets you to your own 'calm default' ... then you can engage with the 'collective delusion' (lived life) more easily.

Long live the multicellular kingdom! 🦠 😅

Congrats🎉 on surviving the Piscean spin cycle. Definitely a trip and detour especially when escaping the cult of religion. Sounds like you went too deep too fast. Best to aim for balance. If you're open to further conversation as you've stated, I'm glad to reciprocate and engage in dialogue. Cheers 😊

Sorting thru whitewashed new age shit and distilling/embracing our t is crazy af. I remember this vividly in my own experience. We’re healing thru this together.

I’ve been through very similar Things. Thanks for sharing ☺️

If you are nonbinary, why transition?

Being a minority feels like being pushed into a pit you inadverently helped create, only to be eventually helped out... unawarely stepping on the heads of the others who will need help later. Ignorance is bliss until you realize its cost you normalized a long time ago.

This helped me so much, thank you for posting this ❤️

Wow, that was such a great video! Very helpful and informational as a lot of guys don’t talk about after care and such.

I was raised in an immigrant household (Ghanaian) in non-denominational Christianity w/ a former worship leader father and a mother, that was still very active in the church as a volunteer and life group leader when I moved out and went no contact exactly 6 months ago. I grew up knowing I was queer and gender expansive ( i use multiple labels - nonbinary, genderfluid, genderqueer, transfeminine) but not having the language and not fully deconstructing from religion or unpacking my queerness and gender identity until I got into college and for years I experienced so much gaslighting and denial of emotions. There’s so much negative messaging around queer people that was implicitly or explicitly spread from religious people including my parents. There’s so much grief and grieving that happens even when you’re separate from the people that caused that trauma and emotional pain. There’s a lot of details I left out and still I’m practically writing an essay lmao. But thanks for this video Mav.

Thanks for reacting to our Middle Ground episode. Even though you don’t agree with many of the things I said, I do appreciate that you thought it was a discussion worthy of sharing with your audience. You did have questions about me being emotional during my interaction with Jake on this specific prompt, and to boil it down (even if you don’t believe me), I just felt for him and the sincerity of his heart to ask the questions he was asking while also finding out how genuine his love for Jesus is during the very first prompt (almost all of his walk with God and amazing testimony wasn’t included in the episode though and that’s a whole other layer to all of our interactions). So much of the prompt you featured was edited out by Jubilee, and there was also a lot of being cut off mid-sentence so I understand the confusion when I start crying and appear to snap out of it rather quickly. Jake was awesome to talk to, but you didn’t get to see the constant joking and back and forth he and I had as well during our hours talking as a group. The edit was mainly focused on our difference of beliefs. I hope that answers your question about that, and I do appreciate hearing your feedback on this segment. Have a great day. 💛

So your binary is not determined by chromosome makeup, right??

Sad that you felt such disconnect with your body. I hope it was all you hoped.

OMG SOMEONE THAT LOOKS LIKE MEEEEEE HAIIIIIIIIII :D

Woman with frog voice.

Man made to be divisive it’s ridiculous