omg righttt??? hahaha like see me but also pls don't

I'm so sorry to hear that happened to your classmates...it's absolutely awful to go through, I hope they're doing okay now. Thank you for words of encouragement, and support, it means a lot!

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Thanks for the suggestion! I submitted an appeal to the dean and it was denied despite not following committee outlined procedures in my dismissal. Their legal team drafted a response that missed the point on purpose, I'll make a video talking about it at some point. My current very non-factual *speculation* based on how royally they messed up in my dismissal is they're mostly focused on damage control: protecting themselves from a legal standpoint instead of remedying any of the damage done. Admitting they made a mistake would mean they're taking responsibility which would be a liability issue for them. It's quite unfortunate.

That’s so messed up! I’m sorry the school treated you this way. We put all this work as a pre-med, during med school, and these processes cost so much time from our lives as well as money. It’s messed up that they could even think about dismissal without giving you an unbiased advocate. Your speculation makes a lot of sense. Do you know what your next steps are? (Just taking time to heal, legal action, applying to a different medical school, doing a different healthcare profesion, doing a different type of profession, etc)

@@WhiteElvenDragon Exactly!! Students should have an unbiased advocate..but no, they deny them any legal support, meanwhile they have a whole team of lawyers behind them helping them figure out how to change and bend the rules to their way, and get students out. It's so unfair and yet so legal so they go unchecked. I'm not sure what my next steps are, they're unfolding in real time moment by moment. A next step was replying to your comment for example :) It's both an exciting and terrifying time to be me; we're all finding out where life will take me next together. I'm trusting things will work out as the universe intends. Thanks for asking and for your comments :)

@ I love that perspective!! It’s honest and hopeful! I’m so happy that you have such a resilient spirit. I trust things will work out too!! 🥰

@@jeatificar this is such a good idea. part of my problem is that don't know what i don't know being first gen and not having as much of an idea what my rignts are/how these systems work and how to navigate them. it is absolutely ridiculous. a faculty member submitted a complaint to the UCSF title IX office on my behalf, and they responded to me after 4 hours spent on my intake call saying there's no basis for further investigation... but reporting to a credentialing body is a great idea!

@@èè-fày-chóó-qóó I'm from the UK but facing something similar. There are obviously differences in how things are done where I am versus where you are and I don't think I can help much with specifics - *but I want to urge you to fight back, and that it sounds like you can win*. Institutions often brazenly do things like what you're descrbing in the video because they (correctly) assume there are almost never consequences. That is not because they're totally immune. It's because most students (or more generally, marginalised people on the receiving end of this) don't even know they can fight back and it's incredibly draining if they do. Incredibly draining - but again, it's possible to win in the UK and it must also be possible in California. Sounds like you've got some good advice here and I'm glad to see you taking steops to fight back. I would also urge you to talk to a layer as soon as you can. There may be a short statute of limitations for legal action for discrimination (and/or deadlines for challenging university decisions) where you are, like there is in the UK. So I urge you to act quickly. Look up the Academic Parity Movement. This kind of behaviour is - sadly - widespread in universities. But there is support out there. Best of luck!!

@@èè-fày-chóó-qóó contact the student union, maybe they can guide you on first steps or at least what dept / people to connect with

@@AyanaMcCalman yayyy!!! i love that you found resonance in it! it's so good. 💜🖤

@@AyanaMcCalman thank you sooo much!!!! SO MANY HUGSSS 🦋💕💕 happy 2025 🎉

I truly didn't!! ❤‍🩹

aww no u didn't!! wow tysm 🪼🩵

it really is!! 💔

it truly is...i'm glad you all raised me to do what I say and say what i do 💜

@@èè-fày-chóó-qóó❤

yeppp! so much confusion and chaos kept me so distracted from understanding what was actually happening.

wowww my heartt!! 🥹 thank you so much!! 🥰🥰

exactlyyy! the false advertising is actually really violent.

me too! thank you 🩵

I agree, it's really wild. I think our futures are bright, and will be outside of institutions and systems of power. Our future is in community, built on deep love for ourselves first, that will then allow us to support one another in integrity, love, and compassion.

seriouslyyyy where is the ether😂 watching your channel growth video yesterday was so heartwarming! 🌱💜 also, i used descript today for the first time, and loved it!!! inspired by your reviews :)

hehehehe i'm soo glad you did!!! twas meant for the special ones ❤

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aww 💜💜💜

ahhhh, so glad! it was soooo fun to make!

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me too!!! ♥

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yesssss!!!!!

Your comment means so much. Thank you for the clarity with which you see me.

awww! i love that for you!! thanks for sharing :)

thank you for being here!! i'm so happy to have you! 🫶🏿

yes yes yes yes!!!!! this!!! thank you for sharing! a huge part of why people don't see it is all the PR places like this put in place...it fuels self-gaslighting because everything is saying one thing, and yet these systems feel oppressive af. so glad folks are leaning more into sharing their lived experiences because they unite us and help people see they're not insane. that is where the truth is, not in all the falsities being claimed by these institutions.

That is quite the statement. Why do you say that?

@@hajirahf4185 Medical schools especially an elite institution like UCSF do not dismiss a student, any student, lightly, especially a student in the MD/PhD program which is very competitive to get into. The school invests a lot of resources on the students to fulfill its mission to train academic physicians and medical scientists who will be leaders in their field, in medicine and in research. They want the students to succeed. That’s the whole point of having this MSTP program. The last thing they want is to dismiss a student. In this video, she doesn’t provide any specific details of what happened, which to me is very telling and possibly a red flag. Obviously I don’t know the specifics or the circumstances of her dismissal, but I highly doubt that UCSF would dismiss a MD/PhD student without cause or legitimate reasons. If the problem was academic insufficiency, I’m pretty UCSF would’ve given the student opportunities to make improvements and show progress. Dismissal for academic insufficiency is literally the last resort, after the student repeatedly failed to meet the standards required to advance through the program. Being in medical and becoming a doctor is not a right. One must work hard to reach the competency required for all students. And sometimes, for some students things just don’t work out. The school at some point needs to cut their losses so to speak. Maybe she just isn’t cut out for it. Who knows? Regardless, now she’s no longer in medical school, she can still do other things in life and be productive and successful. That’s what I meant that UCSF probably did her a favor. But whether she decides to move on from this and pursue something else and be successful is entirely up to her.

Thanks for sharing and elaborating on your perspective. There's a version of me from just 6 months ago that would've totally agreed with you. It's what I believed for so long, and what kept me in the program until this happened. It's why I recruited so many other students who look like me and told them the MSTP would support them no matter what. I miss those days and that version of me; life was so much easier and more idyllic, and I understand the allure in holding onto this version of reality. You're not alone, and so many others across the field share similar sentiments on what I'm going through. Since there is now more information available since this video went live two months ago, I am clear on your choice to keep your opinion unchanging even as of 18 hours ago: elite institutions like UCSF can do no wrong, always have the best of intentions and are ethical in their dealings, in situations like these, students like me are the problem or "red flags". That version of reality is totally valid. I hope you hold onto it, and while it keeps you safe, you never have experiences that cause you let go of it. I hope you are never forced to see that even the most respected of places are deeply prejudiced; that people you respect and look up to within them do very icky, underhanded and abusive things to keep their hallowed halls inaccessible to those deemed less than. It's not a pretty picture, yet it is my current reality. I would not wish it on anyone. Again, thanks for your contribution to the conversation and your good wishes and intentions for me to succeed in whatever I do next. I hope you stay well and keep caring for yourself.

It means so much to have you here, thank you sooo much for being a part of my community, Char! 💓

Welcome, thanks for stopping by!!

Yay to the algo, and thanks for being here, and sharing! I really hope you get to experience all of the things you've been working towards, even at UCSF. It does work out for some folks and I hope you're one of them.

Ayana!!! 😭🫶🏿thank youuu for seeing me!

@èè-fày-chóó-qóó you are seen and heard. Stay true to you. Your voice is your shield🥰

my voice is my shield! 🥰

awwww! I'm so glad you're here, Francine 🥹🩷

Thanks for asking, Jacob! I'm both autistic and have ADHD, recently adult diagnosed in the last 1-2 years! I'm also gifted, which adds a whole layer of complexity to things because I'm perceived as high functioning in certain areas and not believed to need additional support in others. It's such a trip!! I would love to hear more about you!

They do it a lot. I was accused of drug seeking and I was looking for antibiotics cuz I had a tooth infection. They gave me a prescription for over the counter Tylenol.

Thank you for sharing, it's really tough to experience not being believed or taken seriously when in need of care.

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Thank you so much for sharing...I am so sorry to hear how much of a struggle having your experiences invalidated by providers like these have been. The frustration is entirely warranted and knowing why doesn't take that away, and I'm glad you're holding onto what is true for you. The amount of stress and harm healthcare providers like the ones you are describing do and put on their patients is directly a reflection of what is being done to them so they can make a living/keep up with their "life's purpose". This career has a way of defining people's identities beyond it just being a job and it makes it hard to leave or see things as they are. It's all really messed up. A big part of why I chose to give it up is because I was required to be cognitively dissonant and in denial to cope...it was torturous.

@@èè-fày-chóó-qóó Thinking about your point that the career can be identity defining, I'm curious about something. You've mentioned before in another video that you've participated in your own exploitation/oppression. Do you feel that the medical field encouraged you to do this while you were studying and working in it?

totally..willingness to be exploited and oppressed is a requirement to work in medicine...it's a "calling" that's also a way to "earn a living"... I have to prove I am worthy of being alive, I don't get to just be alive. I have to earn being alive by following rules that are harmful to me and have gratitude/consider myself lucky because I have a life others want so badly (getting into med school and a school like UCSF is extremely difficult and being there is considered a great honor) It's very dystopian to realize applying to med school/residency is competing for the opportunity to be exploited and oppressed, and staying in the profession requires that I be grateful I am lucky to be one of the chosen ones.

yes, it's absolutely alll connected!!!

I appreciate you asking...it's a mix of all of the above. I was in good academic standing and passed all my courses, so they had to find a way to twist things and create standards I couldn't possibly meet with other things...painting my behavior as "unprofessional", denying me accommodations, etc etc. Having no legal representation while being targeted for dismissal by the second largest employer in the city of San Francisco, with a full legal team and multiple full time staff who got to change rules I wasn't even aware existed, as they needed was never going to end well for me. I'm working on sharing the details of exactly what happened in other videos, and a lot of it comes down to me knowing my shit, speaking up for myself, and them not being able to control me, all the while looking the way I do. That's not allowed for people like me...at all. They kicked me out, and I chose to give up medicine because I saw it so clearly and accepted that I just wasn't a good fit anymore. I've grown to love myself too much to accept the amount of mistreatment it would take to make it through. Could I have sucked it up and done it? yes. Did I want to? absolutely not.

exactlyyy!!! it's so dehumanizing.

this oneeeee