Rocking is relaxing. I move alot. Staying still is uncomfortable for me anywhere, unless I'm in bed. I have ADD and PTSD. I've been diagnosed as antisocial. I have intense emotional dysregulation, rapid cycling mood swings, blah blah. I agree that the endless diagnosis names are irrelevant. We're all floating around on a ball in the middle of outer space and amazingly not falling off of it. It's utter madness living here and it's feeling more and more scary, I find that when I really spend time throughout the day talking to God (Jesus, The Ineffable) that I feel dramatically better. I start the morning just talking with Him about what I want Him to take away from me to purify and redeem. I let Him know how deeply I regret my actions and place it all in His hands. Some of my actions' results are absolutely unable to be reversed, but can be used for His Glory. That's what I ask for. We are just human and quite fallible. I adore humans and I hate them at the same time. I find when I step out of my house, I am so sensitive to everyone's shtick, vibe, motives etc, that I just can't wait to get back in the house. So I force myself to walk throughout the neighborhood and engage with people, asking God to help me see them thru His eyes while I do it. And it's great! But then the anxiety creeps in again and I have to run back home. Lol. I'm always torn inside myself. Because I gravitate towards dark, creatives, I got heavily taken advantage of as a young person. So my trust issues are pretty extreme. I've been asking the Lord to take the blinders off my spiritual eyes so I can really see my own issues better. I think I've been living in denial of how damaged I am. But I'm starting to see it more and more. And staying alone and working through this stuff and watching videos like yours is highly therapeutic. I watch people like Jordan Peterson who is very real and open and I like a lot of what he says and it helps. So yes this is my form of therapy. I sink into self-harm daily by ripping at my skin, scabs, etc. tearing hair out sometimes. My body is covered in scars from drunken accidents and tearing at my skin. I look like a giant walking accident most of the time. But they are battle scars. Major vice is my overconsumption of caffeine. And I find that my self-harm gets dramatically worse when I drink too much caffeine. So the Lord is helping me cut that back dramatically. I went from 8 cups a day down to 3 or 4 max. I usually just drink black tea or instant coffee with cream no sugar. the coffee is deadly for me. So I've cut that out all together at least this week. It flares up my temper. And I have a very bad temper. So better to do a little less of everything and stay calm and talk to God ALL DAY then give into self harming behaviors. My brain is definitely not average. I have some kind of chemical imbalance that I'm always seeking dopamine. Qigong and isometrics, light weights and daily multiple 30 min walks outside, creating ANYTHING artistic, dancing, music, healthy clean eating and connecting with like-minded spiritual warriors are making life so much better. Thank you.

Absolutely agree about doctors and therapists. You're right on point. You're in a very healthy place and it's inspirational.

Let's do it, man. I'm right there with ya

Great great great advice. Yes!

That's how i feel about putting it all in writing. But it probably is really cathartic.

Fantastic. What a wonderful witness you are!

Your openness about your experiences are exactly what will bring help to people. There's not one human being on Earth that doesn't struggle with demonic activity. It's just so cool to hear someone talk about it. There really is only one way to live, for Him! Praise Adonai!

This Present Darkness by Derek Prince was quite an eye opener

Very interesting.. Derek Prince is serious business.

Absolutely agree. There's no way around this truth.

Excellent words of wisdom.

So interesting listening to you. You're doing great. And the content you're providing is very helpful. That's absolutely is a spiritual battle. We all have to fight the demons in our heads. I have also come to the conclusion that we have one purpose here, use our gifts to lift up others. It's important to keep our lives simple, and it's really live like Jesus did. That's a tall order but He gives us the strength to do it. The dark days will certainly come but we've been given the power and authority to trample snakes and scorpions and over come all the shit the enemy can throw at us. You're doing so great! And another thing, it's harder for artists/creatives. We're very sensitive and feel everything so much more powerfully. It may not be a bad idea to consider maybe finding a church in your area that's got other creatives in it. Like a hipster Church or something

It is a spiritual battle, bigtime.

I'm an introvert by nature but I've been feeling similarly to you. Sober socializing isn't easy when you work from home, which i also do. I like the suggestion that someone gave you about possibly getting a pet. I have dogs they're really very very helpful on so many levels. I think a lot of people are feeling isolated. It's getting to be a very common theme that I see all over in these threads..

Thank you so much for this video!! You truly do care. I really have to get better but sometimes it feels like there’s no way out

God will bless those who turn their life around.

The idyllic, white environment scared you

I’m going to rehab Sunday for a month. Gonna miss the internet. Anyway I appreciate ya

I have watched a few of your vids and I clicked on this on bc I’m trying

These vids help a lot!!

OK, these are some good reminders, there’s no question that increasing your mental clarity and boosting your drive, comes with quitting. Yes, there are many ways to kick the habit, Steffon Barkload's Quit Drinking Forever is what worked for me, best shortcut I go’ogled that took days without withdrawal.

Thanks, these are some good reminders, there’s no question that increasing your mental clarity and boosting your drive, comes with quitting. Yes, there are many ways to kick the habit, Steffon Barkload's Quit Drinking Forever is what worked for me, best shortcut I go’ogled that took days without withdrawal.

AMEN

Amen

Amen needed this

I've been watching several of your videos. I can relate. I don't drink everyday..nit when I do I can't stop. It's scary I want to be delivered from alcohol and lust

What a wild and crazy story! Praying for your continued sobriety and health :)

Self pleasure is not a sin.....I see alcohol bad

Glad to see you back. Im still staying strong with sobriety myself. Going on 5 years. A trail of total carnage im still trying to recover from

😊

Interesting that you made this video just yesterday. Yesterday I went 13 days without masturbation and pornography. But I had a "trigger" that led me to watch pornography all day, and at night I went to a prostitute, and then I watched more pornography and masturbated again. This fight against porn and sex addiction sucks. Could you make more videos on this topic specifically?

The booze vampire still sidles up alongside every day when the sun's going down. I just keep walking.

I started noticing the changes long ago...

Fu*k Alcohol 🔥

Its been just 10 days and I feel so much better!

You OK bro?

In Arabic tradition When you drink alcohol and you sleep you become the Satan wife …

Thank you!

My name is Deb, & I'm an alcoholic, sober today through the grace of God & the program of AA. Sobriety has been work, but well worth the effort. My AA family has been a gift & helped me through situations that I couldn't handle alone. I have 27 years now & thank God for my sobriety every day.

Thank God and thank you.

I love you brother..thank you so much for your story

Dude you look like an older version of Ryan holiday

Yeah how you describe it is same as me. When i have booze with other stuff i go crazy fun but then i get angry and blackout start arguments online. Im trying not to drink now

KZbin Jerry Marzinsky. You won't be dissapointed

Everyone is talking about Demons and Satanism on KZbin at the moment and the World is run by them

And the Demons jump in when you're pissed and you get black outs. Schizophrenics are controlled by Demons

Wow, I used to rock back and forth in a chair, also in bed and wet the bed for years. My mother was a chronic alcoholic, we were taken into care at an early age but thank god I didnt end up like her. But the emotional baggage as a child was unbearable, they had to take me out of school as I was so shut down. I'm not an alcoholic but I did used to like getting wasted when I did go out on a week-end. I hardly drink at all now. I've never had any cravings for drink but I did end up living with an alcoholic in my early 20's. Alcohol is so damaging to families and the Government refuse to ban it or even lable the ingredients on the bottles

The comparison of demons and alcohol definitely pre-dates any Ozzy Osboune quote!

Mrs. bumble….

8 years ago I drank to the point of delirium tremens. Wild horror. Insects were crawling on my back and in my mouth, and in vain attempts to shake them off and get them out of my mouth, I screamed in an inhuman voice alone in my apartment, littered with empty bottles, dirty vomited clothes and rotten fast food. I found the strength to quit drinking and haven’t drunk for many years. It’s like being born again..