I posted on the last video too. And im here now 35 myself. I am sober from alcohol and drugs to be fair. But the rest, is just so so bad l. Ive failed so much myself and I dont know how to do anything. Ive a talent for singing and Id love to put up a youtube video and wouldnt have the 1st clue. Id love to wedding sing but ive no idea where to get started and every day knowing this seeps so deeply in my brain and it just sets me up for each day in total pain and devastation and then i cant do anything for each day. I barely eat dinner anymore. I just cant figure out what i need to do to get where I want to be im so crippled. I cant keep friends, can never get a boyfriend. Cant get going, cannot do anything. So so so depressed!! So badly want to sing, sell some art. Im like a bird forever trapped in a cage permanently!!!

Adam! You started so few months ago making videos about depression and how you felt stuck, with no job and no real direction. Look at you now!!!!!!!! Videos about the difficulties of managing people!!! Very difficult situation too being the new boy and being (deservedly ) promoted over them. Look how far you have come so quickly ! Absolute superstar ! Proper uplifting to see you get what you worked for, what you deserve. To quote scarface (nearly) “I just don’t see how they are going to keep a guy like you down”

I'm 30 and also a massive failure. It only gets harder to fix things as you age. For me, living seems much harder than just ending it all at this point. It's over

Congrats

Thank you for being this brave and sharing this with the world. Just know that I'm sharing your pain right now, your video made me tear up. You keep saying that you're a failure, but, with achance of sounding corny... you sound like a warrior. It's not you who is failing. Life keeps throwing you curve-balls but you're still here, fighting. I wish there could more I could say to make you know that you're real, that your pain is real and that you've been brave and strong. I'm sending you strength friend, I hope you're well.

Are you monitised yet?

You're a manager already? Well done!

Nice brother !

I'm with u 44 yr old, hopeless here, male nurse aide, no vehicle, no wife, no kids. I have no future. I wsh the best for u though. I hope you are soing better than me.

Thank you Adam. My comment might not mean much but your bravery to make these videos help me feel I'm not alone. Wish you the best.

You are not stuck at your parents. They are stuck with you.

You failed yourself but now get offline and fix it

I just searched this up and my names Adam too now I'm scared

Thanks for the video! Btw you look like Pandora Boxx (as a man) from Rupaul's Drag Race lol

If you are still here, you are not a failure. People say horrible things. People do worse things. It really is not safe to connect with many people any more. You must realize that people say & do awful things out of the depths of their own suffering...they are trying to take their feelings of unacceptability & put them on to you. It is extremely hard to keep going. But the alternative is too awful to contemplate. My brother made it to 32. The violence & neglect of our family is what really killed him. People are awful. But some silently hope & pray for the struggling ones to survive. If people knew that some are hanging on by a thread, they may choose different words & actions. But this world is hard. It is hard to be a friend to yourself. Very very difficult. But there really isn't any alternative. Doing violence to yourself or others gets us nowhere. Except maybe to hell.

basically, they are lucky to have found you and you them. I hope you keep progressing with this, save tons of cash and get your own space! You are a quality humans being Adam, keep at it man!

Hey Adam, thank you for this brave and frank video. ❤ Adam, I did post a really helpful comment a short while back which was mysteriously "removed" no sooner than I posted it, but I will endeavour to try again. This is going to be a somewhat "lengthy" comment, but bear with me it's all positive. 🙂 So as a previous manager myself, I will say by far the most "challenging" aspect of the job is "people management", simply because they can be so unpredictable and not everyone has the best of work ethics (and that is a poor showing in the recruitment process), however if everyone were the same that would also cause complications, as it takes many people bringing something unique to the table to make for a varied and "enjoyable" work place and work team(s). From a manager's perspective though it's important everyone is "focussed" on delivering for their employer(s) and contributing along the position and tasks they are employed to do... Sounds complicated and stressful, thing is it needn't be. ;-) So obviously from a manager's perspective they "ideally" need "co-operation" and a healthy working relationship with those they are responsible for, however even in the best of environments people fall out and attitudes can change and I doubt if there has been one single manager who has fallen foul to such things... So when a manager isn't receiving the co-operation from their colleagues and they are starting to become obstructive, or worse still destructive there is a approach manager's take to make life easier for themselves, and it's a great foundation of "mind-set" to work from too... I will share it with you. 🙂 So I worked for supermarkets, and it is steeped in "documented training" of colleagues right the way across the board (employee structure). The documented training shows that they have been trained correctly and that they fully understand what they have been trained to do (in the absence of documented training, their previous work output proves they know what is expected of them and that they are competent in delivering on task etc). From a manager's perspective this means they can delegate tasks/work load onto their colleagues and for a large part not have to worry about micro-managing/supervising how they go about that task because it is documented that they know what is required of them. This takes weight off shoulders, and if they fail to deliver on those expectations/finished product, they are "accountable" as such. Also if they break procedures and/or behave in a manner that is not appropriate they are "accountable" for that whether that be along the lines of written procedures they have "signed" to abide by, or procedures that anyone would be "reasonably" expected to abide by and there is often health & safety in that mix too, something every employee is responsible for (health & safety for themselves and also for their colleagues/working environment etc). In short they are measured by output and quality of output (and there will be a finished product and/or documented quantity etc. of output as evidence of such performance) and their "behaviour" and how they "compose" and "conduct" themselves in their work and in the work place... There is no "management" accountability in this approach, all the onus is on them to deliver as expected of them right the way across their performance, or lack of... So with this approach manager's can focus more on the "people" side of things and building a healthy rapport with their colleagues, or if they are being deliberately belligerent/awkward etc. they can be pulled up for it, or if it warrants it escalate their behaviour to senior management... The thing is for you Adam and every other manager who has been promoted and still expected to work alongside their previous colleagues is the situation and scenario they face is "very awkward"... Ideally manager's want to give praise and "recognition" to their colleagues for a job done well, but that can come across as patronising and condescending to some, and as such this approach can even be counter-productive... Due to the nature of this "very awkward" scenario many managers go through a process of removing the obstacles (people) causing them deliberate problems in favour of a fresh work force where co-operation and "smooth" employee relations become taken for granted... I am not saying you should take this approach, but many have including companies who have taken over other companies and "cleared" their work force out to replace it with those of their mind-set and business objectives (or to put it another way those they can trust and depend upon)... I am personally not a fan of this as these are all people with their individual financial obligations and also obligations to their loved ones, but I mention it here because this can be very much a human natured approach of addressing perceived problems as "quick fixes" for them and perhaps perceived "best case scenarios"... Now lets move onto a good manager's character, values and behaviours... Managers are for a large part responsible for delivering on company's expectations and also responsible for their employees under them... A manager leading by example will have and live by their integrity, unbiased understanding and "fairness". This equates to being equally respectful to each member of their work force, understanding them, their "character" and their current mind-set/thoughts around their work, their work place, their employers and their colleagues. It is keeping one's finger on the pulse of the contributing factors that matter in terms of a harmonious working environment which also has knock on effects of controlling attendance and also output (a happy work force who feel valued, respected and appreciated) is going to be a much more productive work force than one which is at odds with each other... Adam I could go on, but there is probably a lot to already digest here. But a brief summary, don't take ownership for how they carry out the tasks delegated them, instead measure them on their "competence/performance", "attitude" and "behaviour", and if possible escalate short falls in these areas to your bosses. Do value them, their contributions and give praise and recognition for their hard work, but do it in ways that don't come across as patronising etc, and do still connect with them as individuals... It is gently instilling in them a mind-set of the work ethics you possess and lead by example with. With regards to manager's qualities/behaviour etc. you already possess these, but unfortunately for some they can't see them past their own short falls in character and behaviour... Perhaps as time moves on those who are obstructive might also move on, allowing for fresh faces who give you their co-operation and share your healthy work ethics and work practices (no doubt just some of the qualities your bosses saw in you when they offered you promotion). One last thing, it is important you are kept in the loop with regards to what was said to your colleagues. Otherwise there "might" be a "co-operation" going on between your colleagues and your bosses which you are being "excluded" from. Really not good and if left unchecked can escalate to where colleagues start complaining about you behind your back, hood winking your bosses to believe they have suddenly changed and their work ethics along with that too, as their real agenda is one of removing you so they can return once again to their "comfortable" way of doing things (in effect managing your managers/bosses)... Adam I hope this has been of some help to you. To add if I had my time again stepping into management (and I faced exactly the same challenges you have/are facing, with exactly the same thought processes you have gone through so please don't ever think you are alone or the first person to have encountered such outcomes etc), I would attend a course around effective people management (gaining their co-operation etc) and delegating, perhaps some of the more challenging aspects of being thrown into the deep end of management... What I will say is it's all a learning curve that continues from day to day, and it makes for a varied and interesting day where someone has to somewhat constantly think on their feet and adapt in any given situation. But the rewards not only professionally, but also personally are off the charts, and you may well find as you grow you suddenly start making all manner of "new" and "rewarding" connections, and who knows you may well find your "Mrs. Right" as you aptly bring to her table of requirements for a healthy, close and loving relationship and perhaps the building of your own family shortly afterwards. Adam much love and respect to you and I wish early successes and "harmonies" in your new position and endeavours. ❤❤ PS: You are having to "navigate" all of this new territory while also having to manage your biological affliction of bi-polar... Quite the challenge and in need of giving extra recognition and respect to. Much admiration to you. 🙂

A book I found very helpful to my management skills is Chris Voss's Never Split the Difference. It walked me through how to persuade people through listening and empathy (importantly, not the same as agreement).

That's great! :-) Congratulations, Adam!

Dont be afraid to remind the resentful cunts

Adam!!!

Sup dude

over expression of emotion and anxiety is men is classic low testosterone production, go to a male health clinic asap, there's no shame in it

Adam could it be your bosses are looking to somewhat re-structure their business and perhaps have a plan for those who are currently not pulling their weight etc... If so perhaps just deliver on your bosses expectations and let them do the rest, giving feedback if and where necessary... To add any boss worth their weight will help and support you in your new position... Hope this has been of some help. ❤

Your mirror is who you answer to

Congrats on your promotion to Manager Adam. 🙂 Your videos of course highlight the need for employers to employ the right people from the off, otherwise of course it often becomes someone else's problem of cleaning up the mess afterwards! For example the "average" person would hope that we have the right people in positions of authority who are "paid", "tasked" and "charged" to set the right example for others to have integrity and not "corrupt" people to "engage" in their lies and crimes from a foundation work ethic of defamation of character extending their "cult" structure and mentality as they do so for the purpose of taking people's freedom and "life" itself... I wish you early and on-going successes with your tasks in hand Adam. 🙂

I was once promoted to the one taking orders and 2nd in command in a grocery store. This caused some drama or minor with another collegue due she had worked there longer than I had. I also won the co worker of the year award from the same grocery store, people doesn't like it a lot when you get success, because they want it themselves. At least is what I am thinking.

What a load of nonce sense

It sounds it, I recall a few videos back you were talking about how you want to do a good job for the benifit of the company, which then in turn at some point will result in pay rises for people. That's the sort of mentality people want for their employees whether they are a manager or even just a general worker. It's in peoples interest to do the job as correctly as they can so the company can continue to run. I think if anything the position of a manager is just another way of validating someone can organise their selfs and others out correctly. I'm sure your role still has some of the other stuff you were doing before in regards to design. Glad to see you are doing well though, I'm sure the other workers will settle down and get over it.

Bad attitude = not pretending that you’re glad to be at work. i.e not lying. Good attitude = pretending you’re glad to be wasting your life in a place you don’t want to be.

Change takes time. Same here for the others. Give it a month just to settling down to new normal. Then look around and reflect. Some change can be made directly sure, but I would say it should be minimal. Mind you, I never been in your position. I have however turned down management position, and didn’t have a grudge towards the guy that got it. I was just happy 😃 it wasn’t me 😂

35 yr old failed life to a manager in 2 years... not bad eh?

Where do you work exactly? What kind of job?

Welcome to management! Of course, you'll get people looking down on you. They are still trying to figure growth out themselves. your job is there to guide a successful process. Doesn't mean they have to like you, although that would help that they do along the way of your own success. Reminds me of a comic strip of everyone looking at the ground until one person decides to look up and discovers so much more. This is a great video.

great vid, emotional regulation seems to be an oddity for some people sadly

The videos are coming thick and fast now!

don't stress yourself out friend !!!❤

Did you get a salary increase in your new role?

Hello Adam, good that you recognized that. It makes sense to clarify this very early on with your boss. The things they want you to work on / solve in your new position need to be solvable in the first place. Please make sure, that you precisely get to know your objectives, so that you can verify if it is possible and if not provide feedback as early as possible.

Hope its very rewarding for you Adam, seems like a good break!

This is something! Congratulations Adam!

Welcome to management Adam! Lots of moving parts, lots of difficult people and situations. Lots of soft skills and organisation required. I'm sure you'll do great :) Word of advice. I would be very discreet with sharing opinions about the business and people on the internet. I am not saying do not talk about it, but don't allow people to watch this and think you're talking about them.

Congratulations! Nice to see things are looking up for you.

God bless you and congratulations! You were faithful and deserve the promotion and you're right about attitude. Either way, good days or bad, the attitude can carry a shit-ton of brick.

Proud of you, Adam!

Glad to hear it

Haven't watched any of your videos for a while. Been struggling really bad mentally atm with my job. Things have happened and knocked me down causing me to feel really burnt out with my job. I have dreaded and stressed about going in every day and it's made me feel horrible. I now know that I want to move on from my job and have for a while I just have never actually made steps to move on to something else. But this video has really helped me chill out and feel better about my job and kind of put things into perspective. I really feel like God put this video in my path tonight and I really appreciate this video. Thanks so much for making this video. I feel so much calmer, like the storm in my mind has finally settled.

Congrats!

Kudos, Adam!!! You’ll be a great manager, mate. All the best setting into the role and thanks for your updates.

Adam this is brilliant! Congratulations! And keep going! The positive momentum will carry you forward. And your better attitude will serve you well through bad and good.