Lol you're welcome grim. I'm having a horrendous last few days and I jsut fucking hate it. I simply don't want to do shit no more

I hope it gets better for you at least a little bit I'm rooting for you 💪💪💪💪🙏🙏🙏🙏

Man some sh!t happened lately at this crap work I'm at. I said it constantly, just because I got this it doesn't mean I'm in the clear. Things can turn south any day, you never know.

It means nothing in the end, cause I'm in the same situation as you are.

🤣🤣

Chris Serfass!! An OG!! Thanks for your comment. But man I *LOVED* reading how you shot your german rifle slugs into that piece of sh!t HP. I swear to f*ck those laptops are absolute ass. They are like...the Chrysler of the computer world (to give a car comparison) - overpriced, underperforming, outdated when compared to their competitions, and RIDDLED with issues. Yet for whatever reason they are hugely common and are used by many corpo's. It's ridiculous. If returning this stupid slab (in case I leave for somewhere else) wouldn't be necessary, I'd take a dump and p!ss on it, and then set it on fire with kerosene. Then dump the ashes in a latrine. Yeah Chris, being a locationcel is rough overall. As far as the bible goes, it's a bit more complex than just "good guys and bad guys" in fact it doesn't really have much of that at all. I won't get into explaining it, but the beginning has a creation myth, then the old testament is really Hebrew-centric and stories of how God helps them out and genocides other nations (yeah, really) but then the New Testament is what really kickstarted Xtianity. The New Testament is the gospel. The gospel is basically the written story of Jesus's life by 4 out of the 12 total original followers of Jesus. Namely Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. The other 8 either didn't write anything, or perhaps did, but didn't survive until today. Oh, there's the gospel of Judas, but it's very short compared to the rest, and it's a bit weirder, but still mostly in line with the rest of the followers. As far as "original Xtian church" technically there is none. All have went through metamorphoses and modifications/councils that written down their own little rules throughout the ages. If I were to be pedantic about it, the only true "church" was Jesus and his 12 Apostles over 2000 yrs ago. And there's very little to no written material on exactly WHAT the SUPER early believers after his death 1-3rd centuries actually believed back then. It was only after Rome stopped persecuting the believers, and Constantine adopted it as his personal faith - therefore making it the Roman State religion that the emperor decided to make a gathering of the scattered proto-christian community leaders (strewn across the Empire) to codify and decide upon stuff like rituals and the nature of Christ. Perhaps at this point it was "closest" to what it originally was. Then you have sh!t like the Gnostic writings...the Nag Hammadi library...and who knows, perhaps there were other proto-christian schools of thought that got out-competed by the variant that won out at the Council. It's not for no reason that there's that saying: *"History is written by the winners"* So the story of Xtianity is complicated. But what truly puts me off, is how the different branches of Xtianity are so quick to point that the other is heretical, meanwhile preaching they're the correct path. Sure there are some that don't necessarily say that the 'other' is wrong, but only that it's "less right" than their own. Lol it's a tiring rabbit-hole really.

VK! Thank you. It's not that much oscillation, more like my natural crappiness at being able to string my ideas in coherent order. Not to mention I never script anything. I did however have a rough idea mapped out since being in public transport as I left work - the part where I said "that's when it hit me" - like 3-4 times JFL. Repressed faith? No. I was once sincerely faithful as a child, terrified of going to hell, all the way up till like 11-12. Then JW's knocked on our door, who didn't believe in hell, which sounded very appealing to me at the time (because of my previous fear) and unlike mainline religions, those nutcases actually read their bibles (they have a modified version tho to be fair) but regardless they had scripted answers to pull out their ass about everything. But even with those scripts it doesn't take too long till you realize they are just an insane cult, and in many regards "unchristian-like" Example: they refuse blood donations because of an obscure old Testament passage, which makes no sense, because the passage says to not eat blood of animals. They conflate that with transfusions(which didn't exist in ancient times, so it's absolutely r*tarded) . They even let their children die in case they need an operation and the blood transfusion is the only option. That and many false end of the world prophecies. Regardless... very long story but Nah VK. Nothing is repressed here. Something existed honestly, but then I got dissilusioned and it died completely. The only Faith I call true is one that doesn't depend on other humans approval, but on natural reason and laws. That's why I still believe degeneracy and "bundle-of-sticks" behavior is still bad. Because it's basically a mockery of what is best for a person. And sodomy is clearly linked by studies to greatly increase the risk of disease, HIV, AIDS, and many MANY others. Don't even get me started on Optimus Prime's. LMAO

@Fupcel great response. Very analytical and comprehensive. I liked it.

@ Thanks VK. When I get all spergalicious, I show it. LOL

Haha hello my man North. To be honest you were somewhere in the background of my mind as I sing this, but in reality it was more dedicated for myself lol. That, and the fact that I like this tune, and I found it had surprisingly easy chords, just a few flourishes and it sounds more than what it is. But yeah man I agree. Stopping now is still good, you won't have that much damage compared to someone who's several decades into it. I do agree that booze soothes the mind for those like us, and quite frankly I will freely admit now, even as I quit it, that soft numbness and slowing down euphoria it used to give - I do miss it. But I think I'm thankfully in a position where I can do without. Here's to us quitting the habit. Keep on, I believe in you dude, you can do it too. 👍

*Woah!* I'm humbled and happy to hear that.❤ No, I will be the one thanking you. I think by the time I reply you're already in camp. Stay strong, wish you well. ✊

😁👍

LOL, thanks. Sometimes it works out

Hello and thank you for the kind words! Welcome to F-up channel (lol) where I produce a lot of inkwell vlog slop videos, and the perhaps once per year "scientific" or "philosophical approach" lol. But yeah, retail can especially suck, particularly if you're sub-par looking in any way.

Hello North. Yes I get what you mean. In essence I try saying the same thing (albeit not often enough, so I should emphasize in future uploads) that everyone just completely defaulting to the "ITS OVER" conclusion is very much rushed. Especially if I see these dudes in their early 20's or f*ck forbid even younger. What you say about my case is highly debatable...yeah I might attract some jaded woman that has already destroyed her pairbonding ability and just looks to "settle down" but do you think I'd really want that? I'm telling you I don't. Give me something genuine, or don't knock on my door at all - that is what I think of telling women. Now it's my turn to sound even more blue pilled than you, but to me, she has to be just as "new" to this as I am, or potentially as close as possible to it (I mean pairbonding). Otherwise it's an imbalanced trade-off - one for which I'm too hard a negociator to compromise for. Anything less than that, and I'd rather stay *monk* . As copey as that sounds.

Thank you James!! Looking forward to seeing what else this year might bring

@Fupcel I'm glad you're more positive

@@Depressed-Unwanted-Man Thanks, I can say the same for you 👍

Thanks cowboy. I mean I wasn't talking about too many relevant things tho lol. This is mostly slop, but if it helps you pass the wage slaving time, then by all means 👍

Hi Elmo! Thanks. Yeah I'm also glad. Glad when I see the bank account jfl. But you know how much of a funny feeling it is? It makes me wanna splurge, but then I remember that I have to save money, and I try to force BPC's voice in my head telling me to hold on to every shekel. lol

@@Fupcel Hahaha. That's natural - getting a raise is something to celebrate. Treat yourself to shwarma once in a while. Then save the rest so you can splurge on something big and expensive in the future.

Eyoo cunthat! Thanks ! <3 I hope you also money ascend, but for the time being enjoy the neeting. Been there done that, multiple times even.

​@@Fupcel neet life aint so bad as long as im not cooped up in the house the majority of the time

Hello pal. Yes I know exactly how you're feeling. I'm living in Europe ofc where like 90% of people still drive manual geared cars ("stick shift" in US terms) so my questions were even more loaded than yours - I only knew I needed to press the clutch first, before shifting up in gear, but I didn't know when you had to downshift, weather you could skip lower, like from 5th to 3rd. The clutch is also very interesting, because if you shift in first gear for example (car is stationary) and you let go the clutch, but without accelerating, at a certain point the car WILL move on it's own, until you let too much go without also pressing the gas pedal, and you kill the engine if you don't lol. Sorry I went into a sperg rant about stick shift, but I just had to say it, just in case you also live in an area where people drive stick. If you're in a country where almost everyone owns automatics (I know it's the case for US) then you're in luck, cause a lot of that headache and extra work is avoided. "I feel like i’ll ALWAYS be thinking “should i go ahead or yield, should i be closer or further from car in front of me aaaaaahhhh!” To this I'll have to say that you'll first be learning the traffic rules and regulations of your respective country. However, most of them are the same globally. But if what you specifically mean is what's the safe distance from another car if you're driving at higher speed (outside a city or village where speed limit is higher) then the answer is about far enough that in case you need to break, you won't crash lol. But usually a safe measure is the distance of the length of your car, and you'll be fine, especially if you drive within the speed limit. In cities and traffic...that's a whole different balgame. But a few very basic rules is ALWAYS drive prudently, and don't expect the other drivers to respect the rules themselves. WITH ANY and EVERY turn, never forget to check all three mirrors (upper, left side mirror, right side mirror) to see if there isn't someone or something close to your car, to make sure not to crash into them. And another important one - never go into a roundabout with high speed. Never ever. Always slow down before a roundabout. And be extra careful with cyclists on the side of the road, particularly if they are older people. You're better off slowing down until you have the chance to go around them, rather than passing by them dangerously close. And pay extreme attention at pedestrian/zebra crossings. You never know when someone wants to cross the road, and hitting a pedestrian on a crossing can literally land you with a fine, revocation of your license, and jail. Usually all those three combined. And also, never take off with your car if your windshield and/or mirrors are dirty. Bad visibility can cost you an accident. Make sure your wipers are in good condition. Check for wiper fluid to replenish it from time to time. Once you station your car always remember to pull the handbrake, especially on an incline. If your handbrake is faulty, then just leave it in gear (if u own manual) it acts as a handbrake. Good luck!

Thank you davidharrow, comments like these really do mean a lot to me holy sh!t. I even remember I made a video on a comment you left, if I remember it was back during "my french girl" arc (rofl) just about 2 months after moving out of my parents house and starting this job. I wish the same for you david. A bit of a random tidbit, but if anything crazy/amazing did happen in this miserable community, check out Love Left Me Forever (Wayne) I think you might know of him. If not - short context he's a 67 yr old dude who hasn't had any box for 30+ years. Cheers. And once again, my sincerest thanks. ~F-up

Thanks man! But for the authentic experience look up the original. I can't hold a candle against that. But I did sing it from the heart, won't lie. Glad it's been a source of cope. Hang on man, hopefully that troubled mind will quell eventually. 🙏

Thank you Rodion. I hope you'll get better with your health man, fingers crossed. 🤞

Hopefully you're joking lol, but I won't start the CopeDonis University where I'd charge ppl jfl. The yt content is free

Thanks DVD, and in the name of the inkies reading I'll also have to thank as well. Same to you pal, Happy Holidays further on, and rest well, just don't crack your bones too hard lol

Would. Lol

Yeah my XMas was mostly the same as well. So you used to help butcher game meat? Pretty cool. See you at the stream!

Basically "Go get therapy" is the new insult to throw at men who even dare to bring something up. It's gaslighting at its finest.

@@Fupcel yep

It's a standard song from Streamyard's playlist. It's called "Rock" 🙂

"Just stop being poor bro"

Appreciate it man, thank you lol. It was a funny stream indeed 🤣