This is why you don’t take advice from just anyone. Ur wife is never happy because u constantly keep her in a cycle of disappointment with ur weaponized incompetence. She can’t depend on u to do something right and she has to always ask u first. She feels like she married a selfish baby idiot and now she’s trapped in a marriage where if she tries to divorce she married a selfish asshole, he’s gonna make it hell to leave because of his ego

I don't totally agree with your assessment, yes it's important to give on certain things, and very important to stand your ground and others

This is very insightful. I'm glad that it is possible for a person to finally get it. I wish my husband would get it. I do not feel safe in the relationship and I do not trust him.

After reading these comments, I realise how terrible some men are at listening and comprehension. I am not surprised that so many of them are in unhappy relationships. Did any of you *actually* listen to the advice in the video?

I know exactly how your wife felt when you left your dish by the sink. 💯💯💯FR FR Not a good feeling and not a “small thing”

TRUTH! This shit should be taught in every high school!

Wow - i thought your video was great - thank you. I'm super surprised at all the comments being so negative ... Most men commenting sound really miserable in their marriages. I guess that proves your point ... and is not very reassuring to people watching this wanting to make positive changes. I'm no expert but Marriage is a covenant with greater purpose than your hapiness. Hapiness is a bi-product of a successful marriage where you honour each other. Marriage is a gift ... it won't solve your problems... it will reveal them.. if you see it as an opportunity to grow and GIVE rather than receive .. your experience might be very different. Also ... why are people in marriages when they don't like each other?

Unfortunately as time passes you learn more about that person. This can be good or bad.

ANY Man who've realized this fact!?...has ALREADY FIGURED OUT women in general and already won half the battle! There's Absolutely Nothing makes ANY woman happy regardless of what you do nor give them so trying your best as a man will only hurt you going through the process LET ALONE make her satisfied which is an Impossibilty! Some ARE they're very own worst Enemies!

Here's my fundamental problem with this idea. In my marriage and a plenty of other marriages, the female versions of those things that you're describing are being done, as well. The little (and sometimes big) things of disrespect, emasculation, pettiness, thoughtlessness are being committed by women towards men. You know what men do a lot of the times? We realize that our partners are not perfect so we accept these flaws and focus on the larger issues, if any. Or, if there are no larger issues, we accept our partners and love them. I'll give you a perfect example: my wife hardly cooks. If she were a working mom, I get it, but she's a stay at home mom with frankly a lot of time on her hands. She never misses a facial or massage, but nearly every single time when I get home, either she has not prepared anything for dinner or has ordered takeout (and, makes me go get the food before coming home). I am annoyed by this, and feels like a disrespect toward me, when I work every day as the sole bread winner. When I stay home on staycation, I can see what she's doing during the day. Playing video games is a new hobby for her so a lot of the times when our son's at school, I see her hunkered down in her gaming room that we set up and she's playing Genshin or something else, while the dishes are piled up (and I get to help her with that). For me, this is more aggravating than a toilet seat being up or a piece of laundry in the bedroom. But I hold my tongue for sake of peace and just move on and try to love on her as best I can.

I have told my husband a hundred times that living in a cluttered, messy home destroys my peace of mind and makes me anxious … a hundred times. He doesn’t care . Every space he enters turns into a complete mess the minute he enters it. Sometimes it is the small things that exhaust you and make you unhappy with a relationship.

This video is so refreshing. I’ve been trying to distract myself after my breakup it’s still so fresh. We were together for seven years, and he ended things out of nowhere. I can’t stop thinking about him. I still feel like he’s the only one for me.

imo - wrong. This guy doesn't know what he's talking about - regurgitating some college bs that only scratches the surface.

I fell into a space where my long-time ex was telling me everything I wanted to here and I asked myself a set of questions that would cement the course of my future: Do I trust this person? Is she loyal? Is this relationship secure and healthy for me? etc. The honest answer was "No". Within weeks of it ending, she hooked up and moved in with someone else. She stalked my social media throughout her new relationship which fell apart a few months later. Turns out she was with me because she didn't want to be alone and loved the idea of being in a relationship, but struggles physically committing to one. It was draining the life out of me but I was blind to it within that bubble. I was clinically diagnosed with PTSD not long ago - I urge men to ask themselves these questions. Safety is significant.

This is exactly what I needed to hear. I’ve been facing trauma from my breakup. We were so compatible together, six years together, and then he called off our engagement just 3 months before our wedding. I’ve been so sad, I still want him so badly, I can still feel his touch around me. I don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t get over him, I need him back.

😐 I'm on board... My wife has complained about her ring, apple Mac book gift I got her and my vacation check within the last month... I'm standing on the edge listening to creed at the moment. There is no fun in the marriage anymore.

Great job ! You have a simple way of illustrating a complex issue and making it digestible. Your delivery is great. Please don't stop. Thank you for making content.

Stop being a wuss in marriages. Do not negstiate or compromise. Both discuss how to meet each others my needs, dont get them met mutually, get thev Fudge out!

This is exaggerated bullshit.

Facts. As an older guy I've learned the hard way how to deal with women and relationships and now in my late 40s I'm an extremely confident man and my happiness doesn't depend anymore in pleasing everyone else.

Forget women. Get yourself a dog

You are absolutely right Mr. Matt, safety the base for healthy relationships.

Bro. Sometimes she’s just effin unhappy with herself. Life is inherently unsafe. You can do everything to make some people feel safe and they will still feel unsafe and bitchy.

My experience is: they are not normal human beings. End of story!

Satan is the woman’s God. Just be yourself, never try to make them happy they will hate you for it. They are evil. All women

Is it possible that the man has changed over the years and no longer works at making his wife happy? After 30 years many men just stop trying at all....I am married to one,...I explain that I am not happy and exactly what is wrong and what I need and it goes in one ear and out the other....he initiates nothing and expects me to do everything so he can lie in bed and play on his phone....

A divorced friend who recovered from lung cancer said he’d rather have cancer than be married. “At least cancer never yelled at me every morning saying I didn’t make her happy.” If you want peace in your life, men, stay single.

10:15. Wait wait wait hold on. She made a responsible choice!?!?? So this new guy she’s with that doesn’t leave the laundry on the floor, I hope that he’s no longer accepting the alimony you had to give her… You know, because she doesn’t need anything else from you right???? Just the laundry??? Where does she live now??? With him???? Is he paying for everything??? Or did she clean you out and got with someone else??? I applaud you if you are giving her alimony and respecting her decision…

8:45 Fine, if you care so much about a laundry on the floor, goodbye, you are single… I have a huge responsibility everyday to keep the bank from repossessing this house that you annoyingly have to pick up clothes from… if you can’t pick up a piece of clothing, then get out…. Find a homeless guy who will pick up your clothes from the street, see how that feels…

6:50, what you described is what we term as “walking on eggshells”. Leaving a piece of laundry on the floor??? Really??? Your life is that great that your greatest discontent is a laundry on the floor??? This world is doomed… let’s go back to old times… when barbarian raids are your common fear…. How’s that laundry looking now???

5:15 Maybe we should go back to a world where there is more danger… see if they start worrying about nonsense feelings…

Advice from a white knight ?? I think not!

Matt, your book saved me.. My marriage ended in divorce after reading it and realizing the solution to my problems.. Now i live single and free.. Much appreciated

4:50: it’s not about whether the relationship will be here tomorrow. It’s about “can we be who we are in this relationship”. Or does some dynamic in the relationship prevent you from being your authentic self? If that’s the case, then you are not safe in this relationship. And then, attempts at intimacy come off as contrived. There’s little in this world as sour as contrived intimacy. It’s painful, it’s tedious, it becomes just another task in a relationship in which you already feel burdened.

2:15: so then, the lesson is this: do not allow your partner’s basic needs to be satisfied! That person will then never go on to complain “the door was last painted three years ago, why haven’t you painted it again yet?” lol

The #1 problem men have is that woman do not communicate a problem until they have already closed the door on you.

If leaving a random dish on the sink is enough to erode trust, there was no trust.....That example shows how impossible women are..

I used to ask my ex partner....."Why is it that you ONLY see and or remember the "bad" stuff I've done...(10%) But never see, mention, and or awknowledge the other 90%??? That question is still yet to be answered........

why does this guy only have a few thousand subscribers when he speaks so much logic and sense... yet the biggest scumbag influencers on the planet end up with hundreds of thousands?

God Created Eve and she still did Adam dirty 😂

Sooooo walk around eggshells and dedicate every nanoseconds of your life to her and her “wants” (because it’s not their needs, it’s what they want) and dismiss your feelings and needs? Yeah nope good try though buddy

Maslow's pyramid actually wrong think. More than everything everyone need llove.

Different holes same problems. Most people that aren’t happy or have multiple divorces are ignoring the problems, dysfunction, and bad coping mechanisms created by themselves

Ive had so many similar struggles in my relationship. I feel you have hit it on the nail with what I need to hear. Thank you for the video!!

No one is responsible for your happiness but you. If another person is unhappy, it is on them to address it. Because if someone constantly comes to you for happiness, it will always be temporary because happiness itself, is temporary. Happiness is temporary as it always relies on external factors which you can not control. Now joy is longer lasting because it is something that is internal and radiates outward, regardless of external factors. You have met those people who radiate joy. They are the people who see the bright-side of things, no matter how terrible the circumstances in life. They draw from within because they have control how they approach and handle their own thoughts and feelings. You think their is something wrong with them because you're focusing on the bad and you don't understand how they can be so positive and hopeful when you are not. So the idea should be is not so much on trying happy but find those and be around who are joyful in life. If you pay attention, it's not hard to see the difference.

I'm not thinking about what some nut job is going to hyper focus on at any given moment.

Yeah...ok

Good luck buddy

Thank you.. This may be a short and to the point video, but thank you. Your video hit home and made me realize a mistake both of us didn't realize we are doing to each other..

I feel like I provided her (37 yo) a lot of emotional safety. And she said I was attractive and well intentioned but that she's a "bougie bitch" and cannot feel feminine if she has to work and self identifies as a "lady of leisure". What would you suggest I do?