14 Things To Expect When You Go NO CONTACT With A NARCISSIST

[@CommonEgo]

*Think you may have had a relationship with a narcissist?* Download the FREE checklist to see how your experience stacks up to the phases of narcissistic abuse: www.commonego.com/checklist

[@DarylLaidlaw]

Who.am.l.talking.to.

[@DarylLaidlaw]

Okay.

[@DarylLaidlaw]

Not.looking.for.anyone.im.merely.saying.that.there.is.a.lot.of.that.on.utube.there.only.kidding.themselves.😢smile.and.have.a.great.weekend.😅

[@hapticsav3605]

​@@DarylLaidlaw9p

[@ChocolateLover4365]

I was with a narcissist, and I went no contact and completely moved away. Him and I share a child together that he doesn't know exist. Him and his mother tried to force me to have an abortion and I didn't want to, so I went away and secretly had him. I used the money they gave me as a starter to buy baby items. He still doesn't know about his existence, and our son will be 10 in September. Am I wrong for not telling him about our son? I feel that I'm protecting my son from him and his family.

[@ladyvirgo013]

So grateful to be a rare one that is NOT on social media.

[@KatherineM-hx4sb]

Sounds good.. Because they can’t add problems to your emotions..

[@ladyvirgo013]

@@KatherineM-hx4sb can?

[@37silverstreak1]

You couldn't pay me enough to join in on social media!!!!!!!

[@ladyvirgo013]

@@37silverstreak1 yup,nothing there for me

[@Elizabeth-px8mh]

I’m not either

[@RafaelSilva-od4bb]

What most victims don't understand is that narcissists are not changeable when they're under silent treatment or no contact. They don't care. They know you're playing their game. So why waste your time? Go live your life and just turn off the lights.

[@monikaspissak4156]

You are absolutely right. Going through this all the time 18 years of marriage. I'm taking care of myself now. A lot had happened. I want to save my life. I need to secure myself (save some money) They are destroyers.

[@RafaelSilva-od4bb]

@@monikaspissak4156 Many victims cling to the hope that at some point during the no contact phase, the narcissist will wake up from whatever the spell they've been put on and love the victim back fairly. But the bad news is no, they don't care, they won't think about you , because they have other sources to feed them.

[@BJBlaskovichGaming]

Yep, that’s what I did just over a year ago. Just turned off the lights and left.

[@felicitybywater8012]

I ran away from my narc father and enabler mother at 17. I just disappeared with one suitcase and somewhere safer to live. I only contacted him once after that and that was just a very brief answering machine message ordering him to execute his mother's Will rather than keeping all her bequests for himself. The second short sentence in that message implied I knew more than I did about a violent crime he had committed. He immediately complied with the Will.

[@RafaelSilva-od4bb]

@@felicitybywater8012When you know who they are from a safe distance... there's no translation needed. It's fantastic how they show us their true colors.

[@bleri8]

Narcissist never stay single!after they have been discarded they will engage with the first person that comes their way in order to show you what you’ve lost, don’t fall for it!

[@Sally237-s4w]

Then she will become me..good luck with the pos.

[@BJBlaskovichGaming]

In my case, even though she discarded me, she got back with her ex from 16 years ago (15 at the time) that had been in the background not just through her marriage (she’s not divorced yet, despite promising me she would), but through our relationship as well.

[@bleri8]

Narcissist use people for their own benefits, be happy that it’s over!

[@BJBlaskovichGaming]

@@bleri8 BEYOND glad. I wish I had never met her.

[@dcprudence144]

@@BJBlaskovichGaming I feel the same!

[@gloriachapman5618]

I went completely no contact. Blocked him on all social media platforms, and changed my phone number. And made that number private. Only way to go.

[@rishelles9306]

I did the same at 6 months pregnant..restraining order, kick out order, and divorce papers

[@gloriachapman5618]

@@rishelles9306 Peace and best wishes.

[@carmenmartinez2359]

I did the same thing no contact 💯

[@spectershore4482]

I've done the same and left the appartment with all my stuffs when she was at work. New flat on my own. No refrigirator, no bed but peeeace! The tuf part is starting new as a man... I can't distinguish narc and women. Being open to a woman freak me out!

[@gloriachapman5618]

@@spectershore4482 Good luck with your new flat. Give yourself a good run single. It’s worth it.

[@jaclynns.jungle]

My narcissist has too much pride to come back around

[@ladyvirgo013]

💯

[@tjfSIM]

Yep. Mine too. It’s a blessing if they have pride because it usually means they’d rather pretend you never existed and look like they never needed you - causing trouble and getting revenge is too much like hard work for them. Doesn’t mean they won’t bad mouth you to people if your name comes up though.

[@wuhva]

same he’s too prideful

[@ka8155]

Same with mine

[@spectershore4482]

So lucky. All of you are lucky!

[@sheilaw2494]

After a six months of no contact, he sent a text to mention he saw a tv show about anger issues that I may want to watch! Interestingly, I haven't had anger issues since I left him 2 years ago. See, it was all my fault, and I need to change. I didn't reply, and I didn't get angry. He's history.

[@ackbuilder8262]

Many women have anger issues and mood swings while in relationship with a man because of borderline traits - it’s called splitting. As long as you don’t have splitting in your next relationship, then your ex might have been toxic. I have been called misogynistic and narcissistic many times to find out later a girl had BPD. She was using her triggers to accuse me when she was angry. It was just a deflection technique.

[@th2acian]

u never did have anger issues.

[@Nisestory]

They never take accountability for anything

[@Nk-Arts]

Soo proud of you

[@SusanHolbert]

Of course, he was the victim.

[@chrino21]

I went no contact and blocked her totally. The best part is, when common friends/co-workers ask “Did she ever try to contact you?” I say, “How would I know?” It always gets interesting looks…

[@mams631]

This made my morning. I'm going through a hard time with a narc. I'm trying to break it off, but we live together and she got me kicked out of my place of residence now I'm at her mom's smh 😢😅.

[@Frugal637]

Well the truth is there is no such thing as blocking even though it gives us power. If this person wants to get in touch they will call from different numbers or make new social media accounts. I know because I had someone text me from 20 different numbers until I threatened to get law enforcement involved. It sounds like for now they took your hint and that’s good.

[@vivianperdue4329]

Good job 👏 👍

[@ConstanceBrown-c5d]

This made my night. I'm currently sitting in my car close to 8p.m. I had yo get way for sanity sake. I'm older and ended up living with my narcissistic mom for 3 very very terrible years after losing my job due to COVID. After much name calling, out downs, and emotional abuse, I am finally moving out into a very nice place in 2 weeks. I'm going No Contact. Was scared at first thinking I might need her if I got sick but I'm trying not to think along those lines. I'm changing churches because we attend yhe some church. I love the church, so I hate this part but I'm going to find somewhere else. Just thinking about how FREE I'll be and how much mental PEACE I'll have. Not seeking revenge, don't care to hurt her, just want to be left alone.

[@GoogleUser-pc6tu]

@@Frugal637 or show up at your job 🤮

[@oldskoolraver1974]

Block their number, delete them from social media, never talk to them again, delete all old photos of you both. NO MATTER WHAT! Absolutely no contact is the only way to get them out of your life. 3 years on and I’m very happy, I have my children, I have a new gal… and the ex doesn’t exist to me anymore.

[@darriuspeterson9165]

Blocked her on every platform…delete her number…no contact. Not even eye contact at work. I’m healing and moving on with life but I’m certain she will try some form of revenge or smear campaign

[@ToFightTheGoodFight]

Amen

[@Bob-zh6dw]

When I discarded my narc, she got engaged 1 month later and married within 4 months. The new supply had just gotten divorced and was very vulnerable when she love bombed him. We were together 11 years and I could tell by her actions, she was cheating on me AGAIN. I left her previously due to cheating and took her back 15 months later. I didn't know anything about NPD or HOOVERING at the time. I discovered the traits of NPD after I found out she got married. So glad I'm out of that mess and relocated to a different state.😊

[@stamatouvable]

How are you feeling about all of that? I’m hurting thinking if the same thing happened to me

[@Bob-zh6dw]

@@stamatouvable I feel sorry for the new guy. He has no idea what he got himself into. Now that I know I was dealing with a small child in an adult body and has no empathy for anyone it makes it easier. She can't even experience the feeling of love for her own children from 2 previous marriages. In the 11 years we were all living together I NEVER ONCE saw her kiss any of her 3 children. Hugs were few and far between. How sad!

[@florianfox34]

Mine got pregnant from her new one on the weekend after the divorce

[@stamatouvable]

@@Bob-zh6dw Well mate, I’m sorry to hear what you went through for 11 years. But I’m so happy for you that you escaped. I hope you find someone you deserve.

[@stamatouvable]

@@florianfox34 That is terrible. But that’s her problem she’s stuck with now. Not yours.

[@andytaylor9107]

The hardest part of the divorce from my covert narc wife is that people who know my heart, my commitment to the marriage, realize there must have been something truly compelling for me to divorce her so her attempts to smear me with people who know me has not worked! Very frustrating for her!

[@taylorclevenger2308]

My ex fiancé left me out of the blue. His whole family is narcissistic, it was UGLY

[@dickjohnson7845]

Yeah, my ex wife after the divorce continued to harass via phone, text and email, but I flat out ignored her. In one of her emails/text she flat out threated to post false information on social media and my works public pages in order to bad mouth and destroy my reputation. I promptly countered with a letter from my lawyer stating that any such action would result in immediate criminal charges for slander and/or libel. She then went quiet.

[@Mr7Niice]

They definitely DO NOT LIKE being called out . When she says block them everywhere she means absolutely everywhere, email and your front door too.

[@darriuspeterson9165]

Yes because they find a way to reach out

[@crystinamarie1]

Yes. Use that door peephole or get a Ring camera so you can avoid them like a door to door salesman!

[@brookecouffer]

I blocked mine all around after finding out how deep the lies and manipulation went. It was a 5 year relationship in total, we were engaged. I started to expect more out of him and his anger grew with me because I wasn't catering to him. Then he stonewalled, ghosted and lead me on for 3 months to test out his new supply. I eventually found out because someone felt sorry for me. I even blocked his mother. He'd have to go through my roommate to get a message to me, and I'd love to be a fly on that wall. I just can't believe someone would tell you they love you one day and you don't exist the next. It's heart wrenching after investing so much of your time and energy into a person that really never cared and lied.

[@Ms.Ny-Gee82]

So hurtful 😢. I just don't know what to do anymore. I tried no contact and he find a way to come back and act the same way again. I'm about to block him for good

[@URmanWANTZme]

I gave mine 17 years of my life, count your blessings that you’re free now!!! Take a deep breath and remember who you are.

[@hernanveigalima2131]

you had one?

[@hernanveigalima2131]

how was it,did you like it?

[@titaniumaura]

_Peace be with you._

[@LoriPARK1111-u1b]

And you…..✝🕎🛡⚔🩸⚖🪔👑👑👑🕊💓💓💓💓💓💓

[@crystinamarie1]

And also with you 🙏🏼

[@titaniumaura]

@@crystinamarie1 Hello !

[@frankiegodinez8864]

I recently ran into my ex at the dog park after 5 months of no contact. (I also work in the same place as her). She knew I was there as I follow a strict routine. She fauxpologised to me and said she had been going through a very hard year and was threatened to get fired. She then invited me back to her place the next week and said her and her kids would love to have me there and than the whole time she was going through this “hard time” all she could think of was me and how I could’ve been there for her if she hadn’t stopped contact with me (even though it was me that blocked her on all social media and phone). It’s gonna be hard to stay away from her as I really care about her, but at the end of the day, I know she will end up hurting me again. We must keep narcissists away from our lives.

[@ASPAseethrough]

Brother, are her kids your or were you playing the step-dad figure...I am in abit of a pickle, as she has a kid from previous marriage and as much as I grew close to the child I still keep in touch with him as I don't want him to get hurt because of this. I have 0 contact with her though.

[@Sublimebutterflyy]

Please don’t go back to the narcissist

[@McOuroborosBurger]

Holy Shit! Thats like one of THE textbook orchestrated encounters. Those feelings you have left and those promises you made may still lean into your thoughts, but forget that shit. It can and will be used to snare you again. RUN

[@addictedtominisandlovingit3912]

Stay strong king... you can do so much better.

[@BJBlaskovichGaming]

Stop caring about her. She’s not worth the energy. It’s not easy to get there, sure, but that’s where I ended up. I don’t care what happens to my ex at this point.

[@alankrohn6376]

I blocked mine on every platform possible. It has been two years now. It really does get better to such an extent that life feels normal after some turbulent times. She is way too busy with the new supply. Secondly she is fully aware that any comeback or hoover will be to no avail. Just smile and wave. Not my circus not my monkeys. I am for once happy and in charge of my own life. Keep the faith folks.

[@alankrohn6376]

If they do come back it will be 99% about them and 1% about you. You will allow the shit show to rinse and repeat. Trust me do not cave in. You are worth so mich more.

[@spectershore4482]

Incredible! I really need to stop seing her ...

[@dottyanaya]

Dealing with this. An uncaring, malignant narcissist for a husband for way too many years. I recently left him, he has not contacted me and I have a sneaking suspicion that he has found another victim and although I feel bad for her, whoever she is, I am relieved that I’m no longer a target.

[@Nk-Arts]

Thank you for this

[@shelleylaneve3534]

If you finally go no contact, STAY THAT WAY!

[@WonderfulTrouble.]

Doing that now with 2 narcissits lol...ur right once u go no contact. U have to stay with the gameplan forever, theres no backing out if it.

[@SerendipityK-d2z]

What if the narc owes you lots of money??

[@shelleylaneve3534]

@@SerendipityK-d2z work through lawyers

[@WonderfulTrouble.]

@@SerendipityK-d2z make the narcs life a living hell until you get ur money back and then go no contact. It works like a charm :)

[@OfficialKoodaBTV]

@@SerendipityK-d2zyour not getting that back bro take ur L🤣. They never paid anyone back

[@christinahobbs2451]

I just ended my relationship, went no contact. Our lives are so entwined, it’s been hard. Finances, property- all has to be dealt with, but I’ll take it as it comes. As I look back, and watch videos, I honestly feel so stupid. I’m very educated, well versed, well traveled, successful, which makes me doubt myself and my own sanity- how TF did I fall for this?? I’m starting to work on myself so I never get into this situation again. Thank you for the videos. Very helpful.

[@OneWhoKnowz]

Well educated has nothing to do with getting abused by a narc

[@jn1211]

in the way you're very well educated, the narcissist is just as educated, only their education is self taught on how to find and maintain that juicy supply. they've spent their whole lives learning how best to manipulate a human being on an emotional level that has nothing to do with intellectual capacity. I was definitely far "smarter" than my narcissist and all that did was make me vulnerable to the love bombing.

[@thehornet6933]

they use dark love bro, anyone can be deceived. sicko’s man

[@MethuselahMusic]

You're not alone (raises hand).

[@spectershore4482]

Narc are just (nasty) kids. And as just kids are touching, they also are... that's the trap. They got adults nuisance arsenal : adult civil rights, money, house and adult appearence and talkings... that's why they're so dangerous! As a kid their parents was covering and being accountable for their bad behavior. Now, it's just people knowledges in psychology to detect them i.e a few...

[@TheIronwil]

The best response to a narcissist is indifference. Drives them absolutely insane. If they spread lies, laugh at the lies and ignore them. If people believe the lies, better to not have them in your life in any case. If a narcissist insults you, laugh in their face and tell them you’ll somehow bear the torment of their bad opinion of you. Watch the tumblers in their brain spin, trying to find the combo to unlock a reality where they still rule. Or if confrontation and laughing aren’t your cup of tea, grey rock them. It will be unbearable to them.

[@darriuspeterson9165]

I smile and laugh around my ex when I realize she’s watching me at work. So much happier without her

[@wa73junior]

Truly break my heart watching this realizing there's no hope for these relationships, almost like you've been loving a ghost the entire time

[@crystinamarie1]

Even worse, a dang ghoul!

[@youareIndenial981]

Im 20 months no contact. Life is good.

[@marytaylor9504]

Good for you!!

[@marytaylor9504]

Good for you!!!

[@DucktapeRiley]

Stop counting

[@Limpbiscuitprince]

Bit of advice for "No contact" if you have to work with the narc: (My experience) Be cordial and answer questions or interact only when necessary. Show no emotion. Not happiness, not irritation. Poker face. If they try to speak to you about anything personal, on either side, tell them you'd like to keep the relationship professional and only discuss work related matters. Mine tried to hoover for the first time this morning after months of no contact. She asked if she could repair the friendship after an empty non-apology. My response was simple. "No thanks." And right back to business as usual. Hope this helps anyone needing an alternative to "no contact"

[@darriuspeterson9165]

I don’t speak to her at all. She is now confused as to why I’m happy at work. I now realize she was literally dating me just to use me

[@Unkshgshsisjklllllllshshsjsjsj]

Thank you

[@chanstew8995]

People need to check their ego wanting a toxic person to want them back. If they leave, be relieved.

[@stardustdreams234]

I was just discarded yesterday after I traveled 30 minutes to her town to pick her up and she just gave me nothing but excuses. I finally had it and told her i was leaving then she started telling me im not going to let you treat me like this after intold her that i went to pick her up so we can spend the day together. She was even texting me to see if i was on my way. Smh. I finally BLOCKED her. Im done with her bs.

[@dracolusus]

This sounds like a dozen situations I've been in over the last couple months. I flipped and called her out on all her BS. Apparently triggered narc injury and she raged on me, gaslight and threatened me with harassment suit, police, blah blah blah. Told me I'm sick, I'm insane and need professional help. I took her advice, less than 2 mins into explaining our 4 month relationship, I was stopped by the old friend and specialist. "She is a covert narcissist, it's permanent, it's untreatable, RUN, NO CONTACT"

[@crystinamarie1]

You deserve better.

[@ranlco9680]

I’m 90% over my narc ex… it’s been a long 4 years on and off …. And 9 months NO contact 😅. The best revenge ever was running into him and his friends at the same restaurant. We caught eyes so I politely said “hello “ with a smile as my new date arrived at the bar…😅. I was so happy I didn’t even feel uncomfortable. My date asked who the guy was because he’s constantly staring us down. I was so proud my feelings moved on! It didn’t even bother me. I will say no contact hurt and it was difficult however ; I also felt relieved at the same time. It was worth it! ❤. The 10% of me is still empathetic in the since that is sad he lives that way. It’s a beautiful thing when two people genuinely care about each other and share life together. He will never experienced that.

[@Boombastics_VG]

Congratulations

[@Bre1002.]

Surprisingly it’s been 10 days and I haven’t heard from him neither calls or texts! I have thankedGod many times!!!

[@marlasharpe111]

Mine has had me thinking I was crazy. He was physically abusive, and I kept taking him back! I've been no contact for a few days now. I can't go back.

[@Jdawgg38]

I just got out of an extremely long and painful relationship with what I found out was a covert narcissist. So far everything you said is happening step by step. It’s crazy to think it took me this long to realize how wrong I was about her. So much emotional damage she has caused me. I finally said enough and now I’m doing the no contact and it hurts me to do it but I know in the end it’s better this way. I hope I can stay strong and not fall for her games…

[@Nerine98]

Stay strong brother. The more you research about them the more you see how fake and selfish they are in their every - even seemingly genuine - action. There will be dark nights of the soul but fear not as they will pass away and you will grow and heal ❤️

[@Riccolo7]

PLEASE...don't ever go back. It will always be worst, the second or third time around.

[@MethuselahMusic]

You're not alone, brother. Living the same nightmare... Stay strong.

[@crystinamarie1]

Right there with you! 4 yrs on and off dealing with this narc and it's extremely difficult for me. But I'm trying again after the millionth time to stay away from him. I hope I can stay strong as well 🙏🏼

[@johnaldape7294]

Hi I am a well aged experienced man . The love of my life is a know it all kind of lady. I listened to your video and is spot on to my girlfriend and I situation. While I am very easy going,open minded,loyal and Loving . My lovely lady is the opposite. Very controlling,closed minded, gossipy, bad temper, and always complaining. We have been together for 3 years. We had a Hugh argument. I just couldn’t take it anymore. I walked out on her and we have not seen or spoken to each other in 3 weeks . I am doing fine as always and wish her all the same . Thank you for your insight.

[@lindaholder2222]

Hi im in that situation with the man that does the same thing to me I'm beaten down my heart has been ripped right out of my chest I don't know what to do he's carrying on like I'm not even here we have been together since we were teenagers I'm completely besides my self in grief sorry I pray you find hope with in your self .

[@Unkshgshsisjklllllllshshsjsjsj]

Heyyyyy great to hear u doing fineeee ❤

[@johnaldape7294]

@@Unkshgshsisjklllllllshshsjsjsj Thank you for your kind words. Hope and pray you are doing great too. I am very happy right now. Life is so beautiful.

[@johnaldape7294]

@@lindaholder2222 Hi I hope and pray that this message finds you in a better place. Just know God puts people in your path to learn from. Some of those lessons can be hard. But nothing is put before you that you can’t handle. Thank you for sharing.

[@FallenMonk55]

Got discarded by ny narcissistic ex, but she wanted to remain friends. She mentioned she still "friends" with her other exes. Once I learned she was a covert narcissist, I made up the lie I found a new girlfriend. She immediately blocked me instead of wishing me happiness.

[@Nerine98]

I had something similar but first she wished me good luck and then made up a reason to delete me 😂

[@Shelbdoni]

She wanted to keep the tunnel of funnelling resources patent.

[@kathleenherron594]

It’s extremely difficult when the person is in your family.

[@JoCed-jc5id]

I’m glad I’m single! Narcs are everywhere!!!

[@katelynnaeristevens1394]

Like parasites

[@basicinfo2022]

The current dating pool is full of highly narcissistic men. I quit dating. Dating is not beneficial for women.

[@leocampa6230]

Being out of state from family made it easy to go No Contact

[@leocampa6230]

New phone number and deleted social media

[@TuerlingsTim]

That was the reason I deleted all pictures of my narcissistic ex girlfriend. Next to that I blocked here on every platform so not able to send something 😉. It’s time to heal

[@ladyvirgo013]

I sent all photos of myself and my husband off in his boxes of clothes as he shacked up with his coworker. I don't want any photos of him

[@latoniahall6421]

I blocked the Narc, Changed my Number! I have been NC 7 Months!!!💪🏽

[@cathie1234]

My life is too intertwined to go no contact. We literally bought a house together and as soon as we signed and bought it he started being worse than ever!!! I couldn’t imagine living together again!! We had been separated. So I have to get him to sign contract to sell the house!!! Then move all the stuff out again. Absolute nightmare. Big mistake!!!! Be careful!!! They are masterful at manipulating!!

[@christinahobbs2451]

I’m going through the exact same thing right now. I just threw all his shit, and him, out, and decided I’ll just deal with the back lash as it comes. Stay strong!! Hugs

[@BillyLintzenich-wf7sk]

Yes they sure are.

[@camisnyder3460]

Same but we have two little kids too

[@MnKHomeimprovements]

So I’ve recently came to terms that I am a narcissist and I don’t like it and I will change all of my ways now that I am aware of my true intentions. It don’t make me feel good at all to be a bad person because I really do have a huge heart. I am destined to change and I will

[@theliftexpert]

Well done, work very hard on asking questions about others lives , listen intently and compliment them on everything positive that they share with you! This will help you build relationships, as opposed to authoritarian dictatorships. Relationships are about relating to each other and slowly you will become a healthy human being again. Best wishes ❤

[@Unkshgshsisjklllllllshshsjsjsj]

Hey its been 3 months we wanna know bout ur journey

[@willdrivesu7914]

If you've truly gone no contact, there should be 0 ways for them to hoover. Anything they do to try to harm you will be done without your knowledge or your concern.

[@nessy9022]

Yeah, this video doesn't really address what 'no contact' is or should be. These comments near the end of the video where people are complaining about what the other person is posting on social media don't sound anything like a serious attempt at no contact.

[@jesslynncoachinghealing]

Exactly. At most they may show up unannounced at your place of residence. Don’t answer your door! Call the police if they don’t leave. Easy peasy. 😅

[@lisaleone746]

Finely got the courage in the no contact not easy but way to much drama toxic draining cheating on me while on our relationship fake! Time for me done with that nothing I did was good enough even while supporting him while he was gone engaged before he left 16 months to Afghanistan sending him packages and still was nasty and rude! DONE WITH THAT!!!!! everyone warned me but I was in denial I woke up finally!!!!!!

[@bbcgvc2384]

That bast*rd was killing innocent people and children in Afghanistan.

[@brianmichel2007]

In my toxic relationship, I ended up moving out of my own house. For 3 months, she continued to try to get us back together. And after the last attempt, she started dating somebody else within 4 days. This was an 8 year relationship chalked up within 4 days to move on with somebody else.

[@mams631]

Why am I catching on to the same b.s. I mean the person I'm with would tell me about her ex's. In a way like they were evil. I'm seeing through all the stories like running through a portal. Memories that I agreed with now I'm going back in my mind. This is painful.

[@ferstday]

You should always block a narc ex on social media when you go no-contact. If you are still receiving likes or reactions on your posts from them, or if you are still able to see their posts on your feed or because you're occasionally checking on what they've been doing lately, you're already doing no-contact incorrectly.

[@cordellacampbell4668]

The only thing saving me from being stalked by him is..I live 4 hours away from him...Thank God!!

[@marytaylor9504]

Same for me.Over 2 hrs away.A cheapskate don't want to burn his gas or put the miles on his truck!!! Thanking God! For my rescue and deliverance!!!

[@dgutierrez104]

She left me a week ago after I begged her not to leave. I seeked therapy and my therapist helped me realize I was dealing with a narcissist.

[@Lois_Unwordy]

Her leaving when you beg her not to is not a sign that she is a narcissist. Some therapists are worse than useless at recognising what is going on . Did she do anything narcissistic?

[@neilwattoo]

​@Lois_Unwordy ya I agree. Unless he's just not saying what happened. From his statement sounds like she just wasn't seeing a future or feeling him anymore. But what do we know 🤷‍♂️ Now if you want to see a real female narcissist, ill send my ex fiance your way. Lol, nah I would never do that to you and I don't even know ya 😊

[@LadybugPhil413]

I finally blocked my ex husband after 13 years. We have teens together so I couldn't block him until now. My boy's are 19 and almost 16. Boy's are old enough to decide what relationships they want and with who. I trust their decisions. Finally free. Ex is hateful and vengeful. I can't take the abuse anymore.

[@scottandrews9519]

I wish I find these videos sooner when dealing with my narcissist. She did an unbelievable amount of damage

[@BillyLintzenich-wf7sk]

Yep i wish i had done more than just google the word narcisst.

[@pierrerahal5397]

Same here. I didn’t even know what kind of illness she had

[@northsideyanks]

Narcissist do both they are the initiators of No Contact as well. They'll come back years or months later trying to initiate Contact again because they're options ran out.

[@djomega8462]

Ive wanted, so bad, to ask how egg-donor has reacted to me going NC. Whenever i do, i force myself to remember what its like dealing with her in person, and it serves to quell the desire out of existence. Its not worth it, since i have to live with 2 ppl who probably feed her every detail. So until i can move out on my own, blocked her phone #, no contact on social media (i dont think we even use the same social media platforms), and i dont ask ANYBODY anything about her. I pointedly try to change the conversation whenever shes mentioned. Been NC since Thanksgiving 2023, and its been an INCREDIBLE relief!!!

[@ego_ogre]

The accidental text OMG - SO TRUE She is incapable of taking responsibility for her actions/words

[@secretsquirel5306]

Yes I've been no contact with my narc ex for 2 years. The last time I saw her was when I was picking up some furniture from the matrimonial home. I remember she was hurling insults at me via another person. I ignored her and gave no response because I knew that's what she craved. Since then I've been on my own and the whole experience has left me very guarded and suspicious of people in general. That said my health has improved, so even though financially the cost was high, I feel positive that it was a price worth paying to be rid of her once and for all. Would I ever take her back? Not in a million years. The end

[@vivisimonvi]

I was discarded 10 years ago and she told me to never message her again (been in no contact since). She told one of my family members she missed me recently and wanted me to call her so I responded by inviting her to a get together that she couldn't attend. I ended up calling some weeks later and discovered she blocked me. At the time I had little knowledge on narcissistic behavior and I was going crazy of what the hell I did wrong. I realize now she doesn't actually miss me but wants to know if I at least thought of or am thinking about her (in a receptive manner) as a ways to feed her supply. She had no intention of meeting me and decided then and there that I've served my purpose for her and doesn't need to hear from me anymore.

[@ezdeezytube]

Maybe because he wanted to cheat on you so he kept his relationship on the down-low with the new supply. He cant do the same with this one, so the agenda becomes to hurt you (the last ex). Once she dissapears off social media that may signal he found a new supply, and the cycle repeats

[@ZacReed-v7m]

​@@ezdeezytubedid you even read HIS story?

[@kierancole5948]

the fuck?@@ezdeezytube

[@BillyLintzenich-wf7sk]

Im slowly learning about this myself

[@ketugrahagraha3673]

My experience. Blocking on social media, blocking email, blocking phone number. If they try to create another email to get through - "next time you do it, you'll deal with the harassment/stocking charge". This part is easy. The hard part is how to evict them from your head where they live rent-free.

[@kirkfrawley7528]

We started out so happy, we spent years building a life together, I cut away at so many pieces of myself just trying to be what I thought she wanted. What I thought would be enough. Around 7 years in, married for 1 with a child, I realised that I didn't have any boundaries anymore, I realised that my daughter and I didn't have any space anymore. When I tried to establish just a couple of boundaries that to anyone else would just be human decency. She made a point to dance on them, I was so hurt and she just laughed and told me to get better boundaries. The year it took to gradually accept what was and leave broke me. I think the only thing that got me through it was my daughter. It's been about a year since but I'm finally okay more often then I'm not.

[@WastelandWalker]

So describes all the emotionally manipulative stunts my sociopath sister has been doing for years.

[@poison_plays]

My ex said we’d stay best friends and is still bitter I told her she had to move out (when I realized she wasn’t going to stop treating me abusively). While living with me as “best friends” and expecting me to wait on her hand and foot as she was used to, she’s frequently complain that I was still treating her like we were in a romantic relationship. 😅 Even back then, when I still thought I wanted to keep her in my life, I could see how absurd that was. Thankfully.

[@SophiaDilworth-bq7sg]

Your soothing voice reminds me of my old Narcissis life coach i forgot her name but her videos help me but she passed may she Rest Easy 🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@NathanSegal]

3.5 months of no contact and not a word.

[@b3mama599]

Same 🙌🏼

[@aakielahrakiep4922]

Stay strong enjoy the peace .

[@girlbeautiful2727]

That’s an absolute blessing they realized that you found your strength no longer weak for them

[@christianhalstead6063]

Be grateful

[@35Zeuss]

Hoping for the same 🙏

[@Logical_Chronical]

Yes! My abuser immediately went to someone he would triangulate with and got engaged to her after I cut ties with him! He also went to other women that validated his ego and was never faithful. Just let it be known that a narcissist will never be truly happy with one person. They’ll always crave novelty and when that person walks away they’ll move on to the next.

[@Ihavenocluetbh]

My ex who has narcissistic traits, suddenly started appearing at the places i usually am at in college and she decided to give me a lot of gifts, including a drawing she made of my ig profile picture. It was so awkward. I just said “thanks” with a super confused look and obviously uncomfortable and she hugged me extremely happy. I regret taking it. Since that happened I’m completely ignoring her texts and when she tries to talk to me and I’ve noticed some changes from some of my friends towards me but honestly idc. She even decided to suddenly start talking to one of my best friends and giving her tons of gifts. My friend admitted to me that it was super weird since she never showed interest in talking to my friend before.

[@Blessme13]

That's what they do. When they decide to discard you they keep contact with someone that is close to you to keep tabs on you. Friends parents kids whomever they think will feel sorry for them. Manipulative pieces of work🙄

[@Riccolo7]

Run and RUN fast. It's a trick, don't fall for it. Whether this woman is a regular or covert narcissist, it ain't worth the gamble with long-term misery.

[@brendonbuchanan5013]

Can you please do an episode about dealing with an ex who is an narcissist using the child as a pawn in a custody?

[@theoriginal7727]

This is the worst!

[@Isabellatan231]

stay strong brendon, document everything time of getting the child and returning the child. be careful the child might hear a lot of comment from the narc parent. I suggest you go parallel guardianship and exclusive guardianship depending on your situation. do not let them suck you back into the life with a child

[@MrStroodle]

I’m on the autism spectrum, and so I sometimes have narcissistic tendencies. However, my ex really is a narcissist and often tries to paint me as the big problem. I’m about to go no contact so I pulled up this video to help me. One of the things that I do because I’m autistic is movies and shows all the time, and use those things I’ve seen as a script for my life (after all, it’s a response or script that’s already pre-approved!). I also have little moments where I’m reminded of things like memes or commercials. For example, when I’m brushing my teeth I think of DJ Khaled saying “little circles!” because of the Geico commercial lol Now, when my ex tries to do something, or my urge to go social media stalk creeps up, I’ll have Admiral Ackbar saying “It’s a trap!” pop up, I just know it!

[@Brysenth]

My sister exposed her true colors as a narcissist 2 years ago. She very vividly showed me she doesn’t care about my feelings and told me she didn’t love me anymore, I never could accept it until, one day I’ve had enough. She tried to label me as a racist, tried to ruin my life on social media threatening posting fake stuff about me, called the cops on me. I’ve realized that the best option is too look the other way. Stay to yourself, worry about yourself and remember to try to stay happy.

[@CinnamonStickk]

Going no contact with a narcissistic spouse is tricky because now they call you stonewalling and label you as the narcissist.

[@sammiebateman8921]

My mother was a raging narcissist. When I went no contact she went full blast with the siblings and forced a sort of loyalty test. They could love me or her but not both. She had a long term illness and then died. My out of my 5 siblings 2 are still in a complete no contact mode with me a decade later in spite of her death. The two with no contact are the flying monkey and the golden child. One of the other three never broke contact with me. She was as loyal as a sibling can be to all of us at all times. She never chose the narcissist over her siblings. Never believed any lie. She was a natural leveler and protective. The next of the other three was too injured by the narcissist herself - we were not close but can be supportive of each other when we are in crisis. It is an agreement of sorts, we admit we do lot have a lot in common but We love one another and are loyal to each other. We have an agreement to give each other a safe place to talk but the trauma is all we have in common. The third has learned narcissistic traits and though he “acts” like her, especially in crisis, he has ever been threatening or abusive towards me.

[@soldierupproductions]

Go no contact with all soulless beings ha😂

[@BlackflowerMuse]

First video of yours I clicked. My issue is with family. Is so validating that there are patterns to understand and think that this is a thing and others encounter as well.

[@Freethnkr]

No contact is helpful, but it doesn't stop me from thinking them almost every day (my ex & my family) i feel like I've abandoned everyone because distancing yourself causes lonliness, it's hard to make friends after abuse, but I also know I can't reopen the door because I will be sabotaging my peace again. I'm just trying to stay busy and pray all thoughts of them go away so I can stop feeling guilty even though I know it was necessary for my healing.

[@HoneySz-q5p]

This was a long distance situationship. Whilst spending our last hours together before my journey. He tipped me over the edge with his delusional comments. I walked out of his apartment and blocked him everywhere. He tried to contact me the next day and realised he was blocked. Expressing concern and gentleness 😂 through text and via voicemail. Received a couple of text and didn't hear from him for 5 months. After that, I received one phone call a month, we had met the summer prior to that, so I guess he expected me to be around town. I eventually had to unblock him, it gave me peace of mind to know, when he had tried to contact me. Not knowing, not answering any phone calls whatsoever drove me crazy. Interestingly, he stopped contacting me after I unblocked him. And I feel empowered to not ever engage.

[@lependu998]

Thank you for this. ❤

[@JustJanieSue]

The question about the ex texting to share his engagement news. Proof that a Narcissist can never be happy.

[@Estebar33]

Just received the friends text yesterday with the "you hurt me so much", no response. Then second text for the " ok i have my answer, i'll let you be ...take care yourself". Today....tried to call. After 6 weeks i didn't think the hoovering was going to happen .

[@virtualmorality]

No contact and small children makes incredibly different. I've been hoovered 9x in a year. I always said yes, cause I hoped, but one she wasn't serious. Alleviating her ability to ruin around and say she tried and I turned her down. She would after 3-4 days be gone again. Strangely enough still hurt like hell every time. She would saying didn't do it right," "missed the window" "didn't act like I cared" etc. If you think narcissism itself is bad, add xanax and ssri's. Whatta whirlwind.

[@melissa_noel]

I just experienced emotional blackmail today, from my own mother. Of course she tried to make me feel bad, but I didn't respond

[@jesuschristisking2877]

Yes unfortunately my brother is a narc, and my poor sister-in-law is going through all of this. Stalking, blaming, threatening, the old pictures, the crying etc etc etc.

[@37silverstreak1]

I went no contact with someone after she told me she was going to "leave it up to me". I didn't hear anything from them for a year and then I got a family Christmas card from her. I responded by sending them a very generic card with my full, first, middle and last name signature, nothing else. Never heard another word!

[@TheIronwil]

I cut contact with my mother 5 years ago. Haven’t heard a peep since, and it’s been great. She’d given up drinking, and I was hopeful that would address her worst problems, and it seemed to for awhile, but she couldn’t hold it in at the end. She tried starting trouble with my wife, and I have no tolerance for that kind of BS.

[@face2799]

I had one come back two times, I was discarded again back in February on the day before vday i think they're gone for good this time, I called them out for being a narcissist

[@shawners34]

I hear what you're saying but let me tell you, it surely doesn't remove the pain of loss. This is not a joke, this marriage to the narcissist was my second marriage. Prior to this marriage I was married for 25 years to my first wife. She wasn't a narcissist but she became very prideful. One day I found her video chatting with another man. Then shortly after that she tells me she doesn't love me anymore. That hurt. I mean we were kids when we started together. It took a bit, obviously, to get over that. But let me tell you, my current marriage, I've only been married for 9 months and we had lived together for 3 years. My current marriage is the one that's the narcissist. Gosh, I even hate to call her that or use that word. It got to the point in September of this year I just had to leave and let me tell you it was sooooo difficult and painful to do that. I almost didn't and I really didn't want to. Getting over this short relationship, and I'm not kidding, has been so much harder then getting over the marriage of 25 years. Every single day I break down in tears and I'm always thinking about her wondering how she's doing and just missing her. Missing the good times that we did have. Going places together, some of the nice things she did do for me. Making me feel really important and special to her sometimes. Like there was nothing else, outside of the Lord, that she wanted. There were moments like that and I miss them so much. She did things for me that my first wife never did. Unfortunately, I would be lying if I said it was all good and the bad that did happen was bad. I'm not going to go into details but I'm sure you get it. Regardless of what she did to me I don't hold any grudge or hatred against her. I feel nothing but love and care for her. I forgive her for everything that happened. I just keep thinking to myself, can't the Lord heal her and our marriage if I keep praying. Can't I save this marriage. I NEVER wanted to go through any divorce let alone a second one. My heart aches for her everyday. All I wanted to do was love her and make her happy. I truly did. Sometimes it felt like this, she just wouldn't let me love her. Regardless of everything that did happen, I miss her very much and this is the most difficult and painful thing I have ever had to go through. I pray the Lord touches and heals her and protects and guards her heart. I will never forget you. I gave you my whole heart.

[@LeicaFleury]

The narcissist in my life is my father... a lot of these videos I feel help me when I translate romantic narcissists to fatherly narcisism.

[@jaywinterbrook]

I can tell you’ve put a lot of effort into the way that you’re speaking. It sounds much more eloquent and concise. I have to make the same effort myself. 🙌

[@mobiusmaximus586]

I haven’t thought about it for years but now that you mention the cryptic social media posts, it makes sense now how this was all part of her long game. Weird thing too, i used to ask her why she was so unhappy about our relationship and she assured me it (the posts) had nothing to do with us or me. She said she just liked the memes. I even told her that it makes it look like i’m really abusive. Still she assured me it wasn’t about me. Had i known then…..

[@littleblueshed.coinslostth3316]

Like the old saying. HITTING THE NAIL ON THE HEAD . 👊👏👏👏👏

[@gracemitchell3633]

I blocked him on everything and changed my number. He drove from Pennsylvania to Tennessee and showed up at my work. I didn't know he knew where i worked.

[@Venomous-Ranger]

Thank you very much for all the insight. I’m not one to share due to my lone wolf nature. It’s refreshing to know that my thought process and executed action was correct based on some of your videos. Thank you for the reinforcement. Keep it up!

[@mjathisbestandteachingskil6980]

You got some very great points which is true thank you👍💯

[@stevec3892]

Did this with my family Years ago . They are the worst on the planet but have no clue what will happen when my parents pass and my older sisters screw me on the will

[@lynjames4306]

Exactly how they work 3 people or more in a relationship 😮 i Remember my girlfriend telling me her Elderly mother had asked if i had stayed the night ,Thing now Was some else there after i went home which is the way there work with no Empathy or care for Anyone Absolutely Brilliant podcast True in every way 😢 The most Evle Creatures ever walking the planet 👹👹👹👹👹 Devil in Sheep's clothing and protected by the Family 😮

[@Jessica-ts7uj]

Yeah right. He won't even be my friend on social media. He needs to look available, all the time

[@dajavoosp]

Im literally about to divorce my significant other. Ive reached a point where I can't go on with this anymore. Im scared about the unknown future. Especially sharing 4 children together. But I have really reached the end of my tether. I need to be me again and the best version of me. They steal who you are and its like a slow death. I need to save me to be the man I know I am.

[@RobertWalker-x9f]

Every word you said, I'm dealing with it now, I'm trying to go no contact at this time, so I expect his rebuttal soon, but I'm ready

[@johnc9152]

Never hoovered, genuinely does not care. Discarded & serially cheated like nothing. Said she’s sorry and to move on. Blocked, threatened me with restraining order for seeking closure. Never heard from again.

[@xfactorunlimited]

Same position here

[@anthonyleveille1]

Im getting stalked and harassed by numerous organizations. When i go no contact-- which means when i don't check their social media pages, when nothing in my life is going wrong at the moment, when im simply not showing any frustration the numerous demonic stalkers do these things to keep me irritable because im going no contact: they will use noise to harass me by making those noises after im done doing something. And the longer i go no contact the noise get louder and more repeated like toddler throwing temper tantrum cause im not engaging in their negativity. They will make me cough constantly using witchcraft direct energy weapons. I know this to be true because the moment i do react, the coughing and covert harassment stops. Until im going long time again without showing frustration. The they get obnoxious and start using more people and tactics for mere annoyance. Their flying monkeys will even start yelling but acting like theyre talking to someone else, saying things like "get back over here" "come on" "Where you at?" basically subliminally saying "why arent you reacting, im worried". The tactics get more obnoxious/noticeable the longer i ignore their weird behaviors. Theyll throw trash infront of my apartment because they know i dislike littering. They'll turn all the lights off in the apartment then youll hear their flying monkeys laughing. Things like that--- Its to the point where these demons understand they're and their drama is not needed in my life, so they project all sorts of strain on my everyday going to still try to put a need in me, the need of getting their harassment to stop. Trauma Bond. Weak insecure people trauma bond.

[@logancahall2123]

I went no contact this morning after a couple failed attempts and am terrified of her wrath and smear campaigns that she already has threatened me with but at this point nothing can be worse than continuing to put up with the abuse so please pray that she doesn’t ruin my life

[@rawfeederlife]

My narcissist is a colleague. She recently insinuated that she could use her platform to destroy my reputation. Once that happened, I stopped contact and blocked. In my case, the people I trust and respect see what's happening. My mistake was that I opened the door (prior to the recent threat) after a mutual friend suggested that she felt terrible for our friendship ending. Thankfully, our entire engagement is via email. I know better than to speak on a phone or Zoom. Now I'm waiting for the backlash. 😢

[@collinr811]

Got off of facebook after constant harassment and never looked back.

[@CedroneTravels]

I got off too--I’m planning.

[@melissapeepgrass5698]

This is so hard because my narcissists are my children.

[@sfletch3042]

Yikes

[@theboyscanswim5619]

All this is so true and familiar. I was married to one. The split was a major, traumatic event. Unnecessarily of course. Futile smear campaigns, gas lighting, embarrassing. 5 years later, my life is still messed up from the whole thing.

[@GabriellePopejoy]

My ex narcissist discarded me with no closure. We went no contact after me begging for him back. 14 months later when i moved on. I accepted him back and he discarded me again this time he left me pregnant with twins. I regret opening that door when he came back hoovering.

[@Tami-xv3ey]

I am so sorry this happened to you…I hope you have family and friends who are there supporting you and giving you love❤

[@kembo444]

Amazing video!! Thank you 😮‍💨

[@csibiedit8046]

Thank you for this video, I still not could understand the moment of spreading lies after break up, I could not imagin that they are waiting for negative attention. After break up from my husband my self-esteem was so law that i was not able to give any responce , I could not protect myself,.. Instead of reaction i started to learn the family law and I made serious headackes for exhusband and his family.Even after many years he answers with reactive abuse to ldivorce issues.This fact also stopped him to hover me, and was not need anymore for no conntact.

[@NunyadameBizz]

On top of that.. exposing and calling them out only makes them worse.. however I'm not getting framed for anything... No matter how many people they drag into it.