3 Things: Dating after Divorce, Unhelpful Husband and dad, No consent equals...

[@yonpark6245]

The confidence of a middle aged man not understanding why a single woman would have an aggressive breed dog.

[@Iwantallmymoney2024]

This! They don’t have to to worry about their safety! The privilege

[@B.Harper7]

And the fact that he is worried about a woman having a dog that can protect her is very telling.

[@daniellemitchell3118]

Yes. It's the same reason we'd prefer to be in the woods with a bear rather than a man.

[@rejectionisprotection4448]

Maybe he's scared of these dogs.

[@BlueAvians]

Haha Im a single woman and I have a big assed 75 lb pitbull. My dog protects me from any threat when I'm out and she is ferocious towards men who approach me. I feel safe with her. Guy is probably jealous of the dog too lol

[@Caseinpoint1777]

He wants a childfree woman, but they aren’t going to be interested in a baby daddy for obvious reasons. He’s a hypocrite and delusional.

[@B.Harper7]

It's like come on buddy, you're almost there, you've ALMOST got it!!!! Awwwww, so close, so close!!

[@videofan1010]

I was just thinking... A lot of the women without children have filtered the first man out...

[@ladosis5596]

Right? 😂 He was zero self awareness

[@TheBetterlife101]

Yeah. I would be one of these women. I'm childfree and I will not date a man with children

[@beepbopboop7727]

Exactly. Men think use “single mother” as an insult like “single father” doesn’t come with a whole load of baggage too.

[@LetsTalkAboutItWithMara]

Exactly! Was thinking the same i will not date a man who has kids anymore I have in the past and they are to what op says also looking for a step mom and take care is their kids . I went on a date when a divorced single father a while back and from jump I knew the problems he was having with his ex wife so much drama and I remember I asked him “ what are you looking for in a relationship or something like that and his response was basically just to have a mother figure in the home for his kids that’s it 😂

[@filmadcamp1512]

As they should.

[@mjackson3109]

1st story: I have an older male relative who’s been married and divorced twice. He had children with the first wife one of whom is developmentally delayed. My sister and I (single, CF, 40+ year old BW who own our homes) were going out and he said something about how he needed to start going out with us; you know to meet women similar to us. Before I could respond my sister told him, “Nobody wants to go out with your old much married azz”. He actually thought after two bad marriages (serial cheater) and a special needs adult child, he was still prime real estate and could date women 20-25 years younger. They are absolutely deluded.

[@briskettacos]

Your sister is a queen for that

[@MrForkfish]

I find it very telling that the guy in the beginning was threatend by the "aggressive" dog breeds some women have.

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

THAT jumped out at me too! Same reason guys are hesitant when a woman is close to her dad and brothers... Like he's not into her having loyal bodyguards around her! And a dog is going to be more important to her than him, take time from him, and can protect her from him!

[@TheePrincessBrat]

I’m sure he knows a man or two with those dog breeds. Or are women only supposed to have “girly” dogs like yorkies?

[@Hopdog230]

He’s a predator in hibernation. He put his instincts on ice during the marriage and now he wants to play. That’s what it is. Once you know the nature of men you will know exactly what I mean. He’s looking for women who will give him the least amount of resistance and an aggressive dog might attack him when he pushes a physical boundary.

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

@@TheePrincessBrat my bestie is a dog mom of 3 "large breed" dogs and she hears that 💩 from guys too! She's 5"2 and petite so they usually expect her to have tiny dogs! She has 2 American boxers and a bull/pit mix 😁

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@Hopdog230 I doubt his bad side was all that hibernated, considering he’s divorced and has a bad attitude. His wife probably got fed up, now he’s ready to become someone else’s problem

[@Strawberry.Letter23]

A lot of women don’t have kids in their 30s because a lot of men like this used and discarded and wasted our time in our 20s… he’s basically talking about why he understands why older men use younger women…

[@B.Harper7]

Exactly, self-reporting and not understanding it! Hey, I'm glad that they let their red flags fly, women are able to pick them out earlier! And the next generation of girls is already learning.

[@dharma6481]

First guy thought he was “high value man” and women would be lining up to give him 🐈 Now he thinks women in dating apps are the issue (them being unrealistic, demanding) not HIM being unrealistic and demanding.

[@PowerJade]

Basically this.....

[@boomerdragon1568]

First guy should stop using the word date. That is not what he is looking for. He should just pay for it and leave single women with children alone.

[@fayepatrice1672]

Exactly!!!

[@ladylarson12]

Does the first man not realize that he too is a single parent and the women he selects would also be “auditioning” for step mom role? And seeing the kids in the photos is weird and creepy to him because he is obviously looking to purely s*xualize her and has no intentions of anything else. He is a huge red flag.

[@rn2787]

If you aren't satisfied with your sex life, you get a divorce, not commit a felony. What is wrong with these people.

[@careottjuice]

Unrealistic , almost no one would divorce over sex life except men maybe

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

The sick part about the wife whose husband sa'd her in her sleep, is that, up until the late 90's to 00's that was still LEGAL in several states! There was no way to prosecute husband's for graping their wives!

[@B.Harper7]

Exactly!!!!! Fking shivers down your spine, nasty dud of a human! I can't imagine how many women have ACTUALLY had to deal with being graped by their husbands......

[@Br0nto5aurus]

Even now there are judges who think marital rape doesn't exist, even with a clear cut case of no consent, shouting, fighting back, etc.

[@zadarasimoleons1019]

That first guy: I hate this, I hate that, me, me, me, me... Also that guy: Why won't anyone date me???? 😢

[@atlfun08]

Yessssss. Do these guys even like women? They reduce women to what she brings to the table. Looks and age and babies. Nothing about who she actually is as a person. Then they talk about having kids like what! You just called some women “bottom of the barrel”. But your a good person who deserves the chance to raise a good person? Or actually maybe your toxic and you want to spread toxic crap. Or perhaps it’s simply your the typical status driven male who wants what all men are trained to want so that you can go to your male friends and say…LOOK AT ME! I GOT the 10 and LOOKs and she will have the BABIES. IM so high STATUS aren’t you low key JEALOUS of me cause I got what YOU want and what HE wants and what HE wants. To bad you can’t have the exact same as me!! WTF is this crap. This is purpose of life?? To be props in the worlds biggest pissing contest.

[@zadarasimoleons1019]

Last story: He didn't start crying because what he did "finally hit him"... He started crying, probably, because she's been acting differently all day and he's realizing that she's pulling away from him and he needs her to "forgive" him (aka pretend it never happened) so that his sexual supply doesn't run away.

[@themysticwarriorgal9465]

He knew exactly what he was doing

[@syrentertainment135]

It’s the manipulation of man at its finest

[@brookealicia92]

20 years olds don’t want relationships that lead to marriage, kids, and a house? Or he wants to waste young woman’s time until she’s ready for that stuff and dip?

[@j.munday7913]

Sounds like it. What a prize! I'm shocked he hasn't been having luck dating. Crazyyyyyy, must be the app. /sarcasm (I agree)

[@beepbopboop7727]

Wanting a child is only transactional if you believe the baby will simply be *her* responsibility.

[@Egg_Apron]

That's true. But how can we know until it's too late?

[@ManUntdForever]

@@Egg_Apronyou can’t, that’s why if you’re a hetero woman who wants kids, you need to go into motherhood knowing and accepting that you could very easily become a single mom, even if you are married, and to prepare yourself mentally for raising the kid(s) alone.

[@B.Harper7]

@beepbopboop7727 💥💥 boom goes the dynamite!! ✨️ Exactly, they are telling on themselves without even knowing it!!

[@naediggs4816]

​@@ManUntdForever this, and many many other reasons, is why I will never give birth. Not saying you CAN'T, but going through that alone sounds genuinely AWFUL, especially in a place like the US.

[@beepbopboop7727]

@@Egg_Apron You can’t, but I fully believe in borrowing a baby and observing.

[@madarawijerathne276]

First op doesn't really want to date women with kids but at the same time i feel its better to hide kids faces on dating apps. There's too many creeps

[@beedeehhhhh]

Why even have them in pics at all? It's weird. As soon as I see a kid on a dude's profile, immediate left swipe. Because that tells me all I need to know.

[@andim4471]

I know someone who works in the courts (UK). The person gets so many child ab*sers in there. One was on dating apps looking for someone with kids. He got caught by one of those p*do catchers after sending messages to them saying he wanted to have kids with the person he assumed was a real woman so that they can abuse it together.

[@OGK-1414]

​@beedeehhhhh most men aren't reading profiles but they do scroll pictures.

[@xletragedyx]

​@OGK-1414 good point. It's pathetic

[@anwarpine6797]

It kinda sounds like he doesn’t want to date women at all tbh

[@brandy4530]

The new mom got pregnant by her roommate, not a husband. This whole 50/50 relationship thing is just living like college roommates forever. Getting pregnant in one of these relationships is like being the roommate who got a pet. Women got fooled with the 50/50 relationship scam. The man needs to prove he can engage, and that he comprehends what it takes to be a parent. Marriage, with this whole 50/50 thing is not proof he will do anything except treat his wife like a roommate. It’s a trap. Don’t have babies with these men. They don’t want marriage and children. I just don’t understand why they even pretend to want this.

[@ragingrn8342]

You're being generous with calling the HuzBuzzard a roommate. This poor woman doesn't just have one baby; she 's got two of them. I hope she gets a divorce soon! You are right -50/50 is a scam.

[@unicorn73212]

Yeah it baffles me why men push for this and why they assume every woman over the age of 30 is a divorced woman with three kids or a pet I like pets but I'm not that obsessed with them because Im not in a situation at the moment to take care of them. Men are so obnoxious sometimes I pray for them because I can tell the drugs are starting to effect them but I don't see a future with them it's like they want a woman just to say they have one not because it's something that's going to make them happy that's the real reason women are opting out because we know they don't actually want us so I don't know why they still look for women if there just going to bitch about being married to women the entire time. It sounds like a miserable life

[@SailorSlay]

Except it’s not really 50/50. That would be a relief

[@kmoon33]

To these men 50/50 only means you get the privilege of paying half of everything, but still doing 90% + of everything else.

[@janjanl1812]

They want the baby for “legacy” only. As if legacy does not need effort to create and maintain. No, shooting your load into women does not count as effort.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

Story 1: he’s the reason for the divorce. And of course women with kids are matching with you, they have kids too, so they probably figure it’ll be fine with you. 🙄 hypocrite. He wants to date like he did before marriage and kids, but you’re not that person and haven’t been for 14yrs. He thought the apps would come through for hook ups. I think he’s just looking for someone to use to “scratch that itch”, and provide companionship. That was a nice way to write, “I see why 30-40yo men choose to take advantage of 20yos who don’t have expectations or standards yet”. How many older men have we seen talking about wanting kids? Oh, wait, it’s always okay when a man does it. Notice how he dances around admitting he just wants these women for fun.

[@honesteaparty]

He's talking about the increase in autism/special needs from later pregnancies when the research shows (correct me if I'm misinformed) that older MEN increase that risk, not women. Sir, YOU are the problem. 😅

[@islandgirl8067]

Story 1. Has it ever occurred to him that the “prized women” on the app have filtered him out? The fact that he’s threatened by the 🐶🐕 is a 🚩🚩Story 2, She’s a married single mother. Story 3, Glad she’s leaving her grapist. 😡

[@TheePrincessBrat]

It’s really wild that he thinks there are no childfree women over 30. I would also like to know what pictures and bio he posted. I’m starting to get a feeling he was the reason for the divorce. Who’s he calling bottom of the barrel, when he can’t get a single good date? Then his mind automatically jumps to “pumping and dumping” a 20-something? When women in his age bracket won’t even match with him…

[@daughterofyemoja]

I don't know, I personally don't like dogs and I definitely wouldn't date someone who has a pitbull. Also, I'm not kissing anybody after they've let the dog lick their face. Some people just find that unhygienic and gross.

[@B.Harper7]

He said a few (2-3) had pictures of them letting the dogs lick their mouth. Agreed I think it's nasty, but the fact that he was more concerned with a single woman having a dog that could protect her, was much bigger of a red flag overshadowing his not liking of dog mouth kisses. I wouldn't date someone that let their dog lick their mouth, but that was definitely just an afterthought to him. I love the fact he doesn't realize that anyone he thinks he would want, has filtered him out 😂🤣😂🤣

[@sheilac3836]

So the first poster complains at women who are past a certain age and in the next breathe justifies wasting the 20 year olds time since he is not going to bring a ring or have kids???? So it’s ok to waste their time i. Their 20’s and then blame them while they are in their 30’s + ? So typical……

[@heyhey439]

And then a younger woman calls him out and he discredits her based on her age and lack of children.... the math is not mathing lmao

[@howboutno412]

This! Let them speak. We need to hear the rot.

[@forthewin6649]

I don't know why Guy #1 thinks he's some sort of prize to any woman. Child free or not, his age or not. He has no hobbies but the gym, he has children so any woman coming in is risking becoming an unwitting step mom or getting attached to the kids only to break up, he sounds like he wants just a friends with benefits situation but isn't being honest about it, he's creepy with that comment about 20 y/o women and I know hed be cheap with he got with a younger woman. He needs to understand the league he's in or get out the game.

[@Thula_Impala96]

Don’t save him. He don’t wanna be saved

[@B.Harper7]

🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶🎺

[@syrentertainment135]

😂😂😂

[@janjanl1812]

I can see why the first guy is unwanted 😂 Single women have lots of choices, they wouldn’t want a red flags cart like him.

[@knowledgeisablessing8767]

Once the husband ignored his wife's "no" and then silenced her, "no." Is what it is.

[@ijustneedausername6742]

I do agree that putting your kids in your dating profile is a bad idea, but more for the safety aspect of the kid. Some weirdo could see that pic and start dating you just to get to them. People who over share their kids online in general are a reg flag for me though.

[@continuousself-improvement1879]

S2: she's a married single mom. She is already paying her own bills, raise the child alone, she just needs to sign the papers. Divorce, babes, divorce. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@B.Harper7]

@continuousself-improvement1879 yup! Unfortunately so many of us were raised to "fix our marriages" BS. And "Jesus wouldn't want this" and all that other bullshit we have to fight through to understand it has nothing to do with Jesus, and he wouldn't want us miserable. I'm so fking thankful this next round of girls have a huge part of society telling them the truth from the get-go. They won't have to learn through pain of going against family, church, friends, and Society; to do what's right.

[@alleycatalog]

Most men don't even read the bios

[@carenasmith7]

I can see why he is recently divorced with kids… I’m proud of his ex wife for leaving that marriage. Can you imagine being married to him? He seem insufferable..

[@80soa]

Stay childfree or have kids with other women y'all... U can raise kids with other moms and be happy and never have to deal with a man in that capacity.

[@queensavage9896]

I was wondering this. Can you imagine two best friends getting inseminated and raising their child together in a platonic way? Why isn't this a thing? As a child-free, I would consider this if I had a woman helpmate and "sisterfriend". We are more kind and considerate, we make something out of nothing, and aren't afraid of failure. No XY involved. 🤔☺

[@80soa]

@@queensavage9896 it is a thing, just not a big thing YET! To me it's the perfect arrangement. I am childfree, but if I wanted children I'd definitely have them on my own or with a friend or two.

[@xletragedyx]

​@queensavage9896 kinda cute if they use the same donor. Their kids would be siblings and raised as such. If I hadn't met my husband, I was planning on doing this with a friend who already has a kid. But she's not gonna leave her loser husband

[@B.Harper7]

I need to bankrupt myself creating a Utopia like this in Florida......🤣😂 such a good idea and so many would absolutely jump at the idea!

[@risitascositas1699]

Back when I was open to having children (10 years ago), I had my gay bestie as backup, aka sperm donor, and participatory parent if I didn't find "the one" before age 35. I still think it's a great idea to have a child with someone you are not in a romantic relationship with so the children will always have a stable home life (no cheating, no divorce).

[@karenwood2928]

Yikes, I was with the first guy briefly when he was discussing the misery of app dating but he turned it dark and misogynistic real quick. Also, gotta love the men with kids who don't want more kids but want to saddle childfree women with their kids!

[@jsChelimo]

The first guy is projecting. He's the one looking for a free nanny

[@beepbopboop7727]

Whenever women complain about their men, I always want to ask what they were like before the baby. Men 100% do switcharoo, but I also think some women believe a man will change from a bum to an amazing father once a baby arrives.

[@ccannon1]

I have not now, nor have I ever been a people pleaser, so it’s weird to me that people have these types of issues. I don’t have kids but if I did, I don’t think any man I dated would be surprised by me saying “you’re going to take care of your baby” and then leaving them to figure it out. I don’t even think I would be the default parent tbh

[@syrentertainment135]

I agree with this message! Let’s be real though, most of the time the red flags are there before the women decide to get knocked up and then they miraculously don’t understand why their men act the way they do. These women are looking for the white picket fence fairy tale that NEVER existed to begin with. The evidence of your fantasy coming true was never there and now you are stuck and resentful. The baby is here now and there is no turning back. Quite the pickle women put themselves in, couldn’t be me is all I gotta say. I was NEVER sold on men, I love me some women lol always have always will!

[@beepbopboop7727]

@@ccannon1 Right

[@careottjuice]

Ugh one of my friends always complains about her men like "He changed after marriage!!!... Okay but I did too" ALWAYS LIKE girl wake up (I can't wake her up)

[@tiahnarodriguez3809]

Men do switch up, but on the opposite side of the coin lots of women willfully ignore red flags. It’s why we really need to stop believing that a man is who we dream they are, and see them for what they really are. Every woman I’ve known who ignored red flags has left me with this sentiment.

[@iamshakuri]

I think this is the wall that those guys talk about. Man you are there

[@tinahackney8111]

Deleting all dating apps and profiles back in 2018 was the best thing I ever did. Decided to 4B, and after some time, the peace was and still is unmeasurable. Why would anyone ever want to go back? It never changes, it only gets worse

[@lydia7866]

Ok…my coffee is ready and I’m listening. This man sounds like he will be single for a while. The double standard. The disgust. The hypocrisy. You can tell he was one of those who showed open contempt to his ex wife.

[@Arabella391]

Yes!! 💯 The double standards are insane, like the cognitive dissonance that men are just not “capable” of computing.

[@Blech-h9z]

I give him props for not introducing his kids to a potential. That's it. Women put their kids in their profiles so that you understand they are a package deal, unlike men, who don't really parent.

[@almadilworth6571]

That last story, it's a shame! I'm glad she's leaving him because by her own admission she was so scared and distrustful of him that she didn't want to go to sleep at night for fear that she would wake up to it happening again! We women are not property; even to someone we marry willingly. Marriage does not equal ownership!

[@moniquej369]

Exactly!

[@j.munday7913]

I don't blame her. What if that was just the first time she caught him? :(

[@filmadcamp1512]

The first man doesn't want to date. He needs to stay off the apps. And most 20 year old women want kids.

[@daysoftheboo]

The lady that hates her husband damn I don't blame her , I'm hating her husband too,. But I know myself if I was forced in that situation I would hate the husband and hate the kid too that's just me,. Women should NEVER be forced into motherhood

[@risitascositas1699]

The married single mom needs to wait til husband is sitting down watching TV then plop baby on his lap and leave to go to the gym

[@TheePrincessBrat]

Story 2: Yet another baby used to sit a woman down. He does understand it’s overwhelming, that’s why he won’t help out. He doesn’t want her getting any ideas about glowing up and leaving. I won’t criticize her. It sounds like she’s used to being disrespected. She didn’t say anything about her mom being shocked about this. OP must’ve grown up seeing this being normalized in some way. It makes me mad how a childhood can haunt someone like this. I would be worried about OP’s husband shaking the baby or “not hearing” the baby cry

[@syrentertainment135]

Yea women get themselves in quite the pickle with these men. They are looking for fairy tale endings that never exist and now after the baby comes they get stuck. Gotta pull your head out of the clouds and see things for what they are or they will get you every time. The man will always be a man, ain’t no changing him. Women have to do serious vetting and take on the responsibility of making better decisions when it comes to choosing who they lay up and have kids with bc in the end, the woman takes on all the risk and responsibilities in these cases. It just is what it is!

[@annmarieknapp]

The research is crystal clear regarding marriage and outcomes. Bottom line: married men live longer and have healthier lives compared to single men, while married women live shorter,less healthy lives compared to single women. And we now have 56% divorce rate. Marriage is a legal institution that overwhelmingly benefits men, while it does not for women. There will always be exceptions to the rule, but that just amplifies the rule, it DOES NOT negate it.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

Story 3: I remember having this convo with some people. They were acting like you must not trust your partner, or have a good xes life, if they can’t wake you up with xes. I find it so weird and violating. Why can’t you just let me sleep?? Who said you could just initiate xes, it doesn’t matter if it “feels good,” it’s weird for you to put your needs before my conscious consent. People who don’t consider that SA, remind me of those who believe your partner can’t gRape you. It’s no surprise the people arguing in favor, also have issues with boundaries in general. Shocker.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@GreatOutdoorSerenity I was shocked tbh, because the 2 main people arguing in favor were girls. But they’re also very male-identified, and have no respect for boundaries (as I previously mentioned). I’ve since cut them off 🙄 so toxic

[@heyhey439]

Even without the r@pe aspect, robbing your loved one from sleep is fucked up and abusive. Sleep is a basic human need why would you wake someone up for no reason? I just don't understand...

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@heyhey439 and being a mother I’m sure she really values her sleep. I’m glad she left him immediately

[@briskettacos]

If it was a woman waking up the man with a huge backdoor surprise, suddenly they would all understand consent

[@soybeans8139]

The first guy, talking about autism being a possibility with women close to 40. Ummm, Sir doesn’t autism tend to be present with older men as fathers? The degeneration for men starts around 35.

[@aylanae4797]

S2: Is why im leaning towards animals. To put my body through all this trauma to bring a mans seed here and thats how he responds. Being able to be free from my exs in every way possible has been my biggest blessing. I hope OP leaves and gets actual help/support.

[@Reallythough]

I’m so tired of these horror stories. I can’t wait until I get free myself. Just leave these men alone. No fairy tales out there. Regardless of how they start they always end in terribly.

[@Sinderella1987]

I agree, you should not put the children on this dating apps, because some people who just want to date you because of the children as in grooming

[@LoremLipsumz]

Sharing these stories is so important but I’m finding it difficult to continue listening to them. It is so disheartening and heartbreaking what women have endured throughout history and are still enduring. I count myself among them, have been through too much and now, in my late 50’s, I choose solitude and peace for myself.

[@marim5620]

First guy was just all kinds of red flags

[@DianaPrinceitiswhatitis]

1. Sir women don’t want you because you don’t meet their standards. Dating apps cost sir. Sounds like he is out of touch with reality. Go be single sir and those women in their 20s don’t want you either. 2. Divorce and get on birth control now. She’s a married single mother. He’s selfish asf! He won’t change ever! I had a c-section and had one child. I went to the gym, while my child was an infant until my child aged out of their childcare at 12, they have free childcare. She can prioritize her desire to work out as part of her own self care. She needs to quietly prepare to leave him! The fact that she can’t even go to the restroom and he doesn’t participate in parenting his own child. He helped create that child. Divorce now you and the baby will be better off.❤❤ 4. Divorce him that’s grape and prepare to leave. No forgiveness for that! She’s not a piece of property. This is why women are opting out. How enraging and heartbreaking! She needs to oops upside his head. This is not how marriage is supposed to be. She needs to check state laws to see if she can press charges against him. She needs a restraining order and a pew pew. That man is dangerous and can hurt her worse or unalive her. I’m praying for her and children and has. 💖💖💖💖💖

[@Ascenith]

#1 is clearly one of those single dads who never actually parents his kids, evidenced by his strong opinions against mothers highlighting their children as an integral part of the deal. Men just /refuse/ to get on board.

[@brandy4530]

OMG! Is that what dating apps are really like? I did dating apps back in 2003, and it sucked back then, but this is crazy. “Prized women!” That really does sound like prostitution. I had no idea it was that bad.

[@TheePrincessBrat]

Idk of any app that uses that language or charges for everything. He’s being hyperbolic and probably not telling the full story. The app might have said something about that woman getting a lot of matches/messages, so do something to make yourself stand out. He sounds rude and entitled imo

[@Egg_Apron]

Right?? It looks to me like men are being presented with ranked choices for women and asked to pay directly for access. Women aren't seeing that interface?!!!!!????

[@Egg_Apron]

​@@TheePrincessBrat What if women aren't seeing the same interface and choices that men are?? 🤔

[@TheePrincessBrat]

@@Egg_Apron depends on the dating site. But for most of the popular apps, the paid option men see are the same as with women. The language they use to catch your interest, is the same too, just switch genders. The only ones I can think of that are different, are dating sites that promote hypergamy or are for serious dating. The women don’t usually pay but the men do. However, it doesn’t sound like that’s what he’s using. If he was, then he knows what it is. I’m not the kind of girl to do this, but I know women who make a “male account” to see what the female options are. I’ve only heard of that kind of stuff on the hypergamy websites.

[@Egg_Apron]

​@@TheePrincessBrat I feel relieved.

[@onlyfacts077]

I can hear the sadness in your voice throughout this video. This definitely was a tuff one. I hope you have a good rest of the day and thank you for your hard work on bringing us these stories. Even the truly hard to hear ones ❤❤❤

[@BurbNBougie]

Thank ya. Yeah, these last 2 were a bummer. I'm exhausted for the things women and girls experience in this world.

[@Egg_Apron]

​​@@BurbNBougie I went through an intense period like that and had to pull away from a lot of the Goddess history and female history research i was doing... Because of the sadness and horror.

[@onlyfacts077]

​@@BurbNBougieno thank you! Because we are all exhausted but women like you help motivate us to keep pushing and fighting.

[@mikochild2]

F that. Leave that baby with him. He is the father, and he has to learn.

[@ss-ds2dn]

Story 3: hopefully she lives in a state that doesn't dismiss marital grape, that's awful

[@thelastshallbefirst6036]

Story number 2, women are going to have to wake up and be a community with each other. Man needs to control other men they need to be in a community with each other. I don't think men and women should be in the same household with each other.

[@jdeux3677]

#3 happened to me, i felt DISGUSTED. I woke up amd said WFT? He said i gave consent, but i was DRUNK...ugh. Still feel shame whenever i think about it

[@biblioholic7139]

I wonder how many dates/matches were "blindsided" by a woman's kid despite it being in her bio before they started including them in the only place guys are looking, the pics. And the last guy saying a wet dream refutes wife's low libido makes me wonder if this was something that happened regularly and she never woke up before. Dude probably still thinks he's a "good guy" despite demonstrating he is unsafe and untrustworthy just so he can get it in.

[@tvdavis]

I was wondering the same, and thinking he has perhaps even drugged her in the past. Either he’s been doing this to her for a while or he’s been cheating. No way a guy like this has waited for sex all this time & then suddenly decided to “go for it” because she was moaning in her sleep.

[@melstarr1864]

For the 1st guy, a parent and their minor child are a packaged deal. It is good that people let you know this in their dating profile. It is equally good that this action filters out undesirable dating aspects.

[@haileys5371]

A New mothers expectation of a man to be fair or considerate when you have a baby and doing everything will leave you disillusioned and resentful.... they don't think you're doing that much, they think it's your role, they think it's what all women do and you don't need sleep etc. Like the comments said, tell him your schedule and use your automomy, you don't need permission for bathroom breaks or gym. As someone who values my right to self determination, I either let my needs and feelings be known so corrective measures can be taken or if the other person continues to take me for granted I organized my life so they are redundant and unessential, hence, I would never stay in a relationship where a man is the sole breadwinner and doesn't consider or respect my needs...quickest way for me to start looking for a way to make my own money...i will go where I have support and work to get bck on my feet to provide for me and my child myself. You hate your husband, stop expecting him to show empathy and start putting your ducks in a row as the relationship is over.

[@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066]

16:35 that's not ok! Not at ALL! When guys think they're entitled to your body without your consent, that breaks the trust between you and it never returns! Just leave

[@NobodyImporttant]

Bingo. More people need to understand that not respecting another’s bodily autonomy means that that they really don’t see you as an equal or worthy of being listened to.

[@nicolewood7957]

3:29 focusing on being the best father is his last resort 😅

[@karenmassey8354]

The first guy needs to date a woman just like him - a divorced, single mom who doesn’t want to get married again. Bet he doesn’t like women like that though which is why he’s having a hard time dating. 2nd story, she’s giving him too many excuses. He understands, he just doesn’t care.

[@breezluize3282]

Having a baby in 2024 (let alone with a clueless husband/partner) is like smoking cigarettes or using a fax machine. People still do that?

[@cwalker6911]

The dad story has me enraged

[@Twinkie989]

I agree nobody should put photos of their children in profiles. I had to address this with stbx. I am sure he thought it humanized him, but most of his children are low contact/no contact with him.

[@brookealicia92]

I was listening to this while walking my pit bull 😂😂😂

[@AbigaleKirsten]

The shushing story made me sick….

[@sfheatherr]

Ladies, that's why even when a "decent" man does online dating, they all think we're trash because online trash is online.

[@andim4471]

All 3 things were hard to listen to. The last one completely winded me

[@legslikewhoa]

20:34 thanks to feminism, martial gRape can be grind for divorce and can be punishable by law now. Thank you feminism!

[@KelceyGovan]

Second story: She’s not wrong at all and she needs to leave. Period.

[@adrianghandtchi1562]

With some of these guys, it feels like that trope where a sign is visible, but part of the sign falls off to reveal a different word, That’s what I feel like a lot of these guys are, they’ve got their charisma. They’ve got their alleged bravado and the flashing sign lettering finally brakes and reveals the kind of person they are. It’s just been hidden in plain sight. And no one could look for it until that very moment revealed itself.

[@AndyyWithAY]

Just bc YOU have these desires, it doesn't mean other women do. If any man does acts like these without your consent it is SA. Him covering her mouth makes it even worse. It's still SA if it's her husband. Consent is mandatory every time. So glad she's getting out.

[@Kris7ification]

Love what you do! Don’t stop doing it ✨💁‍♀️ Ladies, we have no womb for bullshit.

[@PA-vq2jt]

I can see why his wife divorced him

[@BlueAvians]

His whining and he doesn't shut up with the complaints!

[@wanjirunjoroge5942]

I am a woman in her early 30s with a teen daughter who doesn't live in the same country as me but visists 3x a year. I am somewhat an empty nester. I refuse to date a man with small kids, im okay with older teens as long as he is not the primary custodian. With that criteria, i cut off lots of men btw 38-45. I also refuse to date newly divorced men because they are clingy and needy and i know im a rebound. Men above 45, illnesses and ED are kicking in lol. I retired from dating 2yrs ago. I don't even want a cat.

[@BB-gd7ez]

2. This was sad, but I'm glad she is willing to leave early in the game. She knows she deserves better. He is a complete loser who doesn't care about here or their baby. 3. Wow. Just wow. Beyond awful and sad.That last story. He knew what he was doing. He deserves worse, but I'm glad she left. I hope she files for divorces, and he has re-live the reason over and over. Also, no contact order is a good idea. I'm so sorry she experienced that.

[@bcottony]

#2 I need women to stop saying "He doesn't understand". You're making excuses even when you're accusing him. He understands perfectly well which is why he's not doing it. Get a ring camera get a few of them. In the common areas when he gets home walk out that door with your gym bag (don't let him know about the cameras) and see how he handles it. That should allay your fears about your child's safety one way or another. If he neglects his child you divorce him and make sure you get full custody if he's perfectly capable of dealing with his child and is just chosen not to ( a disturbingly common phenomenon) It's time for you to start carving out more time for yourself. He seeks to minimize your labor so that he doesn't have to do it. But you can't have it both ways. Either what you do is easy in which case he needs to show up to do it just as much as you, or what you do is incredibly difficult at which point you need a break and he needs to acknowledge that with a smile on his face and gratitude in his heart. Men extort women into taking all of the child care onto themselves I am convinced of this. I am further convinced that if you refuse to participate, SOME of them will pull their socks up. As for the people asking why he wanted to have children that seems obvious, given the way he's been making derogatory comments about her body he was trying to sabotage her ability to leave him and acquire mommy services. I would argue this is the most common reason that deadbeat fathers have children to begin with. But birthright needs to continue to plummet as long as there's little to no consequences for men who behave this way.

[@Blech-h9z]

I wrote that comment before he said "package deal"😂

[@ManUntdForever]

Have you heard of the NYT article called Was I Married to a Stranger? The whole thing is shocking.

[@KicesiesVlog]

Trigger warning for this comment (SA, sleeping, rugged, etc) and I don't mean to trauma dump.... but... A few weeks ago I suddenly had ALL sorts of memories come to me from the beginning of my marriage (now divorced). Of between 50 and 100 times of him assaulting me on Ambien. I had TERRIBLE insomnia so I had to take a huge dose (per my doctor) and then he'd screw me. I'd wake up in insane pain... he told me I kept coming on to him. (here's the catch, he only "allowed" us to have sex once a day. no! matter!! what!!! And every one of those days, we'd already done it) So I told him to stop. he said "how am I supposed to know you took it!?!?!?" which I sadly decided was fair. So I started to announce it. "I'm taking the Ambien. We're done for the night?" It took months of me journaling any memory that came to me for me to realize that all I was actually doing was announcing to him "hey you're good to r me tonight, cause I won't remember!" I'll never know what was in his sick head. But I think he was trying to baby trap me. (that's all I can guess). I'd ALWAYS lied to him that I was terrible about taking my bc...but I was actually perfect. I NEVER messed up. (Why did I lie, is a good question...! I'm not FULLY sure.... but part of it was so that I could demand condoms even in marriage. His man juice used to DESTROY me) That all happened 17 or so years ago. And then.... I buried it SOOOOOO deep I never remembered it again until a few weeks ago!!! It's WILD how much trauma we can hold and not even know about it.

[@heyhey439]

The first guy ought to lower his standards... Edit: I am SO. FUCKING. TIRED. of the kink community dismissing r@pe victims because they get off to it. It happens all the time, especially on reddit. "Talking" about it beforehand doesn't make it suddenly not r@pe. Couples therapy isn't good for abusive situations, individual therapy and counseling is much better. I hope she gets away from him safely 😢

[@lindadewese6754]

#2=How come you didnt know you would be the default parent? Why do women continue to think men will change and be helpful when the baby comes.He sees it as womens work.Your situation wont get any better,You have 2 choices,"sit or get off the pot'.

[@Sinderella1987]

The fact that she said he was not impacted financially after having a child tells me that 50-50 should end when a child is involved

[@BadGirlMimi94]

Your laugh and blink when you read the "dies up" part 😂😂😂😂 your were this emoji 😆 I am screaming 😭

[@AndyyWithAY]

I don't have a baby with and I'm not married to your husband and i hate him too. Everything is wrong here, but when I used to work in the ER the nurses talked about how a C section is MAJOR surgery

[@layla_and_micahfollowonins2174]

If she leaves him she will get every other weekend to herself….to like be a human who gets down time and do some self care!!! Telling her to be quick when she has to go to the bathroom…don’t let him tell you to be quick in the bathroom!!! In fact leave him!!! What don’t men understand? Why don’t they care about the women they marry, at all? They don’t even really care about their kids to let the mother suffer like that.

[@karenallen6557]

2nd story: how about women think beforehaving kids with men that seem lazy when it comes to taking care of things and think how would it be having a kid with him if I already have to take care of the house cleaning & cooking duties ..

[@rellie_90]

“It makes me feel like you’re saying you are a packaged deal, which IMO is stupid” But…a woman with kids IS a packaged deal just like him and his child/ren, TF?! 🤨 I can see why having the child in the profile pic being weird for OTHER reasons, but not his reason. He’s sounds insufferable 🙄

[@natcl9974]

The first, I agree with him about kids in photos. There are people who aren’t safe and can use this pictures using AI. The man, tho, is being too picky since he has kids and a divorcee, which would raise eyebrows for some. The second: that woman just needs to leave, he’s contributing to nothing but finances when there’s so much more than money. Why isn’t he bonding with his and getting to know them as well as raising them? The third: I say report him and leave him

[@LasBlackUnicrn]

Story 1: I was with him until the age shaming. Ew bro stay single and focus on those kids of yours Story 3: RUN!! I cannot believe that happened to her 😭

[@ladywolfwolf]

The desperate women try to hide the fact that they have kids.

[@saffy_9967]

I don’t understand men who want to date us ladies in our 20s, there is absolutely no generational relatability with them. I think they just want a body of a 20 something woman and that’s it, I also think this makes them feel younger.

[@dumfriesspearhead7398]

They also like the lack of experience as well.

[@K8tti]

@ that guy saying he will go to Bulgaria (presumably to prey on the women there) I'm Bulgarian, even though I've lived mostly in the US and UK, I know that these types of people have the wrong idea about what to expect abroad. His kind is most likely not going to be welcome, because they are lazy. Bulgaria is not as individualistic as America or the UK, and passport bros will not be able to comfortably sit back with a nurse&purse in BG because the community will judge and punish him if he is a POS. Chances are he will never even get close to marriage with a Bulgarian woman, because red flags will be raised in the dating stages. Especially if I'm around to see any passport bros trying to creep up, I will be raising the alarm loud and heavy.

[@pigeoness22]

"At least with them I don`t have to pretend to have some magical connection"...well, he showed his true colors and intentions. He is so pathetic and does not realize that most of these "women" are bot profiles.

[@KarenTski]

Do these men know their baby batter goes bad around 35 and can cause brith defects too

[@Roxie_also]

The truth is most of these guys are paying to talk to bots most likely. 😂

[@LuvsTruth-fs5nd]

Part 1: He literally is judging divorced women with kids. Maybe they have a good reason for putting pics of their kids in their dating profile? Probably, because a lot thirsty men don’t read the actual profile. They will see a pic and run with that. So, it probably helps to weed out the creeps. He’s hyper focused on what he wants and has little tolerance for what women want. Typical alpha male nonsense.

[@kayjeffs3741]

The first guy wants to be able to waste someone's time...