5 stages of owning a boat

I think we all know where this one is going...
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About Dude Dad:
Hi! I'm Taylor Calmus, a Colorado-based actor/comedian. I started Dude Dad© two weeks before my son Theo was born as a way to stay creative while learning to be a father. My wife Heidi and I now have 3 kids and over 300+ videos. My purpose for the channel is to entertain, enlighten and inspire.
In addition to Dude Dad©, I have been in numerous TV shows, commercials, and have regular appearances on Jimmy Kimmel Live. I will also be hosting my own TV show called "Super Dad" on the new Magnolia Network / Discovery+. Heidi and the kids will also be a part of the show. I am originally from the rural community of Howard, South Dakota.
5 stages of owning a boat
• 5 stages of owning a boat
Dude Dad
/ dudedad

[@mama2meditate375]

I’ve always heard that you don’t want a boat, you want a friend with a boat who will invite you along lol

[@naomireaves3742]

🤣 hahaha this must be why none of our friends have boats they just come on ours!

[@237g]

@@naomireaves3742 Got room for one more?

[@whit6172]

A scientific fact of science

[@stevencooney761]

This strategy also wears thin. Always on some one else’s time.

[@mellymellongisland]

That's exactly what we have

[@44ryang90]

You forgot the final stage. Selling a boat.

[@EK--ry3lr]

According to the other videos, he just hasn't gotten there yet...😁

[@jackieann5494]

😅🤣😂

[@O.KFarmToysdeutzallis6275]

Ha

[@papakurt862]

He traded it for another that didn’t cost anything……today

[@Li_Am_17]

You skipped a step: going broke

[@manyalevine1017]

"I am not yelling I am just instructed loudly" love it!!!!

[@Brad_R]

Dude, I love the boat service tech guy. We need more of him!

[@leiwa100]

That will cost you about $1000.

[@Brad_R]

@@leiwa100 🤣

[@afo7266]

"Yeah that'll be about a thouthan."

[@ShawnCNC]

You hit the nail on the head with this one!! We are dying laughing. I just bought a boat a few weeks ago and 1. It’s old 2. I drive a Tacoma 3. My wife struggled backing it in the water 4. It didn’t start after we got it off the trailer. 5. Boat envy is REAL! 😂😂😂

[@FFAdventuresOriginal]

AND....everything is about $1k to fix!

[@joshblubaugh6050]

@@FFAdventuresOriginal With inflation you might as well make it $2000. 😅

[@Oonagh72]

“Babe! What’s the towing capacity of my Tacoma? I thought you’d know.” This whole video is my marriage. This is also the reason we are “boat rental people”.

[@queerskiesahead847]

"FYI I have a headache!!" 🤣

[@MusicalJackknife]

We had two friends who co-owned the junkiest boat ever and named it the Thou Shalt Not Covet.

[@jessediem3064]

My father loved his boat more than he loved life. Growing up, I figured the boat was gonna break down every other trip because his boat envy led to "upgrades" on the engine. I legit thought he was gonna divorce my mom one year when she left the prop down before loading it onto the trailer and didn't figure it out until after we'd towed it all the way up the ramp. It took him months to recover mentally from the loss of that prop

[@MomLife-wb3qr]

The bit at the end about the water bottle was priceless 🤣

[@shillinhite3911]

Actually it was about 12 bucks ;)

[@LavenderSkyla]

You forgot the fueling the boat up on the water. Those boat gas stations are intense. Fastest 300 I've ever spent

[@queentroller2865]

The main reason my father in law didn't finish building his house is because he bought a boat.

[@Fern_Thaddeus]

Lololol

[@Ryansanders80]

you can live in a boat. cant sail a house

[@shaynelhta]

Smart man.

[@fredbrad]

smart enough to notice that work for other people it is not enjoyable

[@amberyoung4425]

I worked at a boat repair shop for awhile and this is so true! 🤣

[@rosskline]

"You're the sight unseen guy" 😂😂

[@krikeydial3430]

"That'll be about a thousand."

[@horatiohuffnagel7978]

If they have money to burn right..... vultures.

[@Kyle_Nelson]

My parents always had a boat, grew up on the water making memories. Now I'm a father of 2 I've had one boat or another since I was 20. Couldn't imagine not owning one.

[@rboddington]

Right on brother, could not have said it better myself. For people who complain about the cost, you can't take it with you. Spend it now, or your adult kids will.

[@markwangontario7573]

I bought a boat during Covid, just finished 2ed season and loving it.

[@Fact_Check77]

I am thinking of getting a boat for this exact reason... Want to enjoy life a little. I have 2 jet skis, they are a lot of fun and if I add a boat the whole family can get out on the water...

[@photodavem70]

The two happiest days in a boat owners life: The day you buy and the day you sell it. :)

[@newracer74]

came to post this

[@cheeseburgerlazers]

lmfao

[@chadkarecki9496]

Then you aren't using it right

[@Corpse1984]

You beat me to it!

[@danlevesque5437]

and the day you get so fed up with it and "accidentally" forgot about the plug and then years later see it covered in mud in the former lake mead floor bed as people on utube are checking out the latest discovery 🤣

[@ProvoDrive]

This was hilarious and true. Can you do travel trailers and RVs next?

[@claireh1508]

YES

[@bridgetthomas7664]

They already did

[@NVS3992]

They did!

[@mattracer921]

More of the boat service tech guy! His list was hilarious lol

[@kathrynharring8270]

this is why our boats are kayaks, a lot less to break and comparatively cheep

[@SugarandSarcasm]

I prefer canoes for the cargo capacity.

[@HarshJain-it2bg]

Intelligence overload

[@mutilatedpopsicles]

I bought a canoe and a tiny outboard engine. I still have a boat, but I won't go broke

[@LiveThriveBuild]

Well done! The boat ramp footage and editing was very impressive. To be able to script all of that, the different camera angles and on top of that do some of it while others assumedly were actually launching their boats. Much respect ✊ 😅

[@ThatTexan2002]

Boats can be a bit $$$ but they are super fun and they can make some amazing memories!

[@rboddington]

Had my boat for 7 years. Just boat a newer and bigger one. Always buy brand new, and get the warranty. Also never trailer your boat, park it at a marina so all you have to do is show up, and head out.

[@timp6858]

As a boating instructor, I get to see all of these steps, all the time! Well done!

[@JB_Hobbies]

That mechanic is why my boat has gone out only about twice this year. The water is a scary place for my wallet.

[@jasonbeasley5766]

If you can pull out a few crisp $100 bills, light them on fire and watch them burn up without any distress, you are almost ready to own a boat.

[@jeaniecameron295]

How does this not have any likes!?!?!

[@maryprice8458]

This is the funniest comment on this thread.

[@Icantball67]

It didn’t cost anything……………..today. 🤣

[@jamicl2580]

"Just kidding, water is just $12" Bahahaha! 🤣🤣🇺🇲

[@Psykout]

I will never understand why the least qualified person in any group seems to be the one in charge of backing the boat into the water. I taught my friend real quick how to back the boat off the trailer and pull up to the dock safely to pick me up.

[@cklindo4646]

The "hehehehe" in the bed was the foreshadowing he didn't pay attention to. 🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@Valkyrie11609]

I bought my first sailboat in 1993. I've owned three. I didn't sell any because of this. I sold because someone offered more money than worth. So I sold and upgraded. Love every minute of it.

[@timlong1462]

Yep, some forms of boating are extremely cheap. I've got a jonboat that's got a 2000 Johnson and has had 0 problems I couldn't easily fix for $50-100. Total spent is under $3000 and I've had it for years. Use it 2-4 times a week. Buddy got a 1979 Catalina 22 for $3000 and we sailed all over the Chesapeake bay for a few years on it without issues. Not all boats fall under the B.O.A.T acronym. Really seems to be most true with the I/O lake boats and V drive boats that everyone wants for whatever reason.

[@lucygarrett9785]

Definitely a lot easier to get your boat in the water when you have a house on the lake. My uncle and aunt live in the house and our boats are docked with a simple lever system

[@suzyrichins7958]

My parents got a boat when my grandfather died. The boat was a lawn ornament for a long time. 😅

[@rebbbgiunta4450]

Be about a thousand 😂😂 love the addition of the lisp!

[@naomireaves3742]

As a boating family I CONCUR! 🥰

[@cheesewhiz32]

How to write off a boat as a business expense, genius!

[@ethanstevenson2858]

"Geez, how much is this gonna cost to fill up? I'm at 95 bucks and only half full!" Me filling up my wife's Toyota Yaris.

[@lisaroper421]

I love how the life jacket gets upgraded too 😂

[@LayAnn]

This video made me laugh sooooo hard as we in this stage of our lives right now. We just got a boat a few weeks ago and we too are going through these stages. I love it.

[@s3ntin3l60]

Then you don't love it...... you're in grief. Acceptance bis the first step...

[@LayAnn]

@@s3ntin3l60 no, I love my boat. But we totally looked, bought 1, and in the stage of spending money on it before taking it out. And haven't gotten to the point of changing or upgrading yet, lol.

[@s3ntin3l60]

@@LayAnn Well good luck to you on the spending money part. That's the worst bit of it all..

[@LayAnn]

@@s3ntin3l60 yea, we are discovering that, lol. But we mostly got everything and are nearly done 😊

[@sxstexanphotography4587]

Aahah omg, he said "8%, way better than our house", I couldn't stop laughing.

[@snowflake3608]

My cousins had a sign hanging in their camp. “A boat is a hole in the water, surrounded by wood, into which one pours money.” So true.

[@cbot375]

my first car has been the same way

[@andyanaoutdoors2487]

Forgot the final stage of selling it. Best day ever when someone pays you for it and hauls it out of your yard. Renting is the way.

[@garmbeliblis]

The life vest in the driveway is genius

[@robideals685]

"It didn't cost anything ..... today .... ..... " hahahahahaha

[@jonlawrence6338]

Don’t forget the day before it goes up for sale. “Welp, this is it……all that time and money for this…..just cruising on the water……yep…..it’s windy, I’m cold, im done.”

[@brentderksen]

"I love it", "thats my girl!!!" Lol

[@amandajofisk85]

I love Heidi’s enthusiasm, but I can’t really believe she said Yes!

[@reddraco25]

I’ve never owned a boat but this was hilarious

[@justgopherit3454]

This is all SO TRUE! But really, all toys are insanely expensive to upkeep.

[@jaredbowman7764]

Man that last bit had me rolling... and then the last bit had me dying! But seriously tho. This is why you always bring your own water and never buy beer at restaurants.

[@hughmungusbungusfungus4618]

This reminds me of when I was a kid. We had a 10-year old pontoon boat. Funny thing is that I don't ever remember it breaking; my dad did a good job winterizing it and those pontoon boats are much simpler than speed boats, runabouts or cruisers for sure.

[@mtwz71]

This is a great video. Well done. Made me lol. I needed this after owning and repairing boats for years now. This video sums it up. 😊

[@mstringham]

I think you can insert about any toy into this video and it would be the same. I keep debating on getting an side-by-side but then I wonder if it’s going to be a money hog! I had a camp trailer that was older and it seem to have problems all the time as well.

[@BT.TexasDFW]

I drove around a Polaris ranger 400 for nearly 6 years daily. I worked maintenance for a large sub division and took it off road, over curbs, on streets. You will assume the normal wear and tear but honestly they are pretty simple to work on too. A lot of videos online. They are great to have for the utility aspect alone.

[@r2hoog1]

I’ve owned 4 boats and 1 side x side… so far, the side x side is a way better cost to value / fun ratio. I do love boats, but I’ve realized that I don’t necessarily love owning boats.

[@brentray9130]

Had a used Bayliner Capri with a 125 Merc for three years, only in salt (Puget Sound, WA) not one problem. Loved that boat.

[@jerikropp6394]

There's an old joke "what's an easy way to become a millionaire? Start off as a billionaire and then buy a yacht"

[@flattopwill]

The boat mechanic is my favorite character you do lol

[@KAyLA_K]

Dude all the work into this video is great🤣🤣🤣

[@stagesixx]

Great editing, very fast cuts, funny and never boring!

[@Icutmetal]

There’s a difference between boaters and boat owners.

[@4Him346]

Omg this is facts!!! as I’m getting our boat ready to go for the weekend you forgot the best part trying to relax and all I hear all day is “dad can we tube now”

[@connieduncan4239]

This is 100% accurate. My husband and I are living it!

[@GoandLove]

I can’t even begin to explain how accurate this video is 😂😂😂

[@mothermarie6057]

1974 is very old, take my word for it 😊 Your happy giggle always makes me laugh out loud ☀️

[@aweirdman1]

dude replacing the entire bottom of the hull for 1k is such a good deal

[@trakker248]

That’s too funny. Got to give you a sub. Can’t wait to see more

[@kevinklein9565]

The boat mechanic is the best character yet

[@FaithWithJay]

🤣 This is awesome!🤣

[@1978sjt]

the 3 best days of boat ownership 1. The day you buy/pick it up 2. The first time you drive it 3. The day you sell it.

[@roamtim]

So true....well done!!!

[@mamadukes1438]

Omg dying 🤣 the backing up to water part is me n my hubby to a T....

[@demontimet7773]

"i don't like it" buddies life nearly died for a sec

[@dawnsutherland3461]

Omg ,so funny. Love your video.

[@RRW359]

I remember my Sea Scout leader jokingly describing a boat to someone once as "a hole in the water you put money into".

[@boomfiziks]

I bought a trimaran sailboat (Windrider) about 15 years ago…still one of my most favorite purchases.

[@thesymphoniclife]

Dudes. Summer before last boat a 1986 boat with the lady. I mean every single part was spot on. Except second boat purchase. Nearly slipped laughing in the shower when the engine died in the water. It all progressed just like that too for us.

[@lucascooley912]

We definitely need more of the boat service guy!

[@Jyock]

My buddy told me its cheaper to rent a sailboat. I explained to him the boat is mine the house belongs to my wife. She doesn't visit my boat unless i invite her down to it. We are very happy!

[@retalus]

My uncle gave us his boat. I did not want it. My mom was excited to get it. The boat requires a fair bit of cosmetic work but is in overall decent condition. Thing is, we don't have the time to go on any body of water and I'm more wanting a camper than a boat because at least the camper can be used as a temporary cabin if guests come over. I'm hoping she'll see the light when she sees how expensive having a boat is. I don't want the boat.

[@themiddleclasstaxslave651]

Sounds like you need a bigger boat … you know …. For the occasional guest house

[@Running-with-skizers]

Owning my boat is a love hate relationship... I love to hate it. But after 10 years I can honestly say I'll never not have one

[@stephenshippos4604]

Th obsessing is spot on! Very funny.

[@thealanford4780]

This is hilarious good job!

[@alwaystinkering7710]

"$265, hopefully for the year." 🤣

[@yaboimax6356]

5 minutes after it's in the water: "uh-oh it looks like it's overheating". Because every used boat has a cracked block.

[@justsayingforafriend7010]

Just in your way always!!! Lollll

[@russianprussian4683]

The best two days of owning a boat: The day you buy it and then the day you sell it

[@simonmiddleton5041]

Get a sailboat, I lived on one for 5 years, great investment!

[@Jay-hr3rh]

"Why did you buy a 1992 boat? You said we're on a budget." 🤣😂🤣

[@caselink5076]

Holly shit this video cracked me the f up 😂😂😂😂 this is exactly what happened to me and my girlfriend. 😅😅 Down to the T. I am still dying laughing. I watched this 30 times

[@joycedollar1198]

You guys are awesome. Keep up the great vids. Btw 1974 is not old! Lol

[@jessediem3064]

In boat years, that thing might as well have a mast with a pirate flag

[@juju1896]

@@jessediem3064 tell that to my 1974 Shamrock center console with 351W inboard that I still waterski behind. Maintenance wins.

[@peanutbutterisfu]

I’ve been a boater since 2005 and because I maintained my boat I didn’t break down all the time like people do. When I buy a boat I go through it and replace a the stuff that wears out. Like my last boat before I even put it in the water I put a new alternator, starter, water pump, sea pump, belt, 2 batteries, rebuilt the carb, new fuel pump, plugs and wires, coil, bilge pump and keep the old one for a spare incase of emergency so it’s set up to be used immediately, the rubber bellows and because I do all this maintenance I don’t break down on a Saturday afternoon and ruin the day but 99% of boaters do absolutely zero maintenance then complain when it breaks down.

[@salegado71]

So true, a lot of people buy a boat without educating themselves what maintenance it requires... and they arrive on the ramp only to find out the boat will not start or crank because the battery is weak. Simple common sense would have save your day by making sure to start the boat before heading to the marina.

[@juju1896]

Maintenance is the key! My dad was right.

[@glennwhitney1494]

Superb - hilarious!

[@Thex1xManBetter]

Love the new character!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@erickitty5546]

Nailed it! 🤣

[@salteastsimon]

You must be some type of boater because you nailed it! haha

[@trevorsmith5881]

Oh shit.. hahaha I love it. You’re speaking to us guys. My wife and I just got a boat and that was the last month summed up in minutes 😂😭

[@gracegoodman9257]

You forgot the part where you’ve just put it into the water only to realize you forgot to put the plug back in…

[@billjuliejohnson4443]

We ordered a new boat - s/b here sometime next week. We're retired and have NEVER been 'boat people' (!!!). Forgetting to put the plug back in is just one of MANY fears and anxiety-inducing worries I have about becoming familiar with our new toy!! Love this video. Have probably watched it twenty times. If you've never had a boat - or never even started researching what boat ownership is all about - I don't think you can quite appreciate how funny and spot on this video is. Loved the '42 cupholders' -- one of the things I always looked for while we were boat shopping!!

[@drewelling4441]

"Says it has 93000 hours. That's not a lot is it" 🤣

[@mrpush2532]

This is sooo true! 😂

[@amandahodder2935]

I died laughing at the repair guy that’ll be about 1000 so accurate

[@Knot_Guilty]

I’ve had my boat almost 20 years. I put about 200 hours on my boat a year. I can’t imagine life without it.

[@RyRyRocks]

"It has 42 cup holders....." I'm sold.

[@angelxhay3042]

YESSSSSSS AMAZING I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!! ITS SO ACCURATE!!!!😂😂😂

[@Anoneymouse]

Lmao wooh full 265.00 hopefully for the year.