5 Things a Narcissist is Doomed to Fail At

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Danish Bashir

Danish Bashir

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 1 100
@simonpegg1196
@simonpegg1196 11 ай бұрын
Accountability: Zero Trustworthiness: Zero Empathy: Zero. Love: Minus. Authenticity: Zero Wickedness: Infinite In short, not worthy of being called a human being. This is a narc in a nutshell.
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
🤣 ✅️ ✅️ ✅️ ✅️ ✅️ & ✅️ 🤪 narcs are EXHAUSTING!!!
@kaleido76
@kaleido76 11 ай бұрын
Nailed it! 🎯
@Soumyaa2206
@Soumyaa2206 11 ай бұрын
Excellent n simple..
@hermymojica3957
@hermymojica3957 11 ай бұрын
Hindi kapani paniwala iyang zero. Reflection ng pamilyang nag alaga ng isang tao. Ibig sabihin ba wala ng nairuring mabuti ang mga Magulang ng isang naging narcissist . ? Bias ang figures. Sarcastic dating. Why discriminate ung may sakit sa isip. This survey s are falsifically commented.
@finishgoogl7960
@finishgoogl7960 11 ай бұрын
like that mad lunatic mohd ?
@Cat-oj4oz
@Cat-oj4oz 11 ай бұрын
Today is hard. It is my narcissistic mother's birthday, and she is 92... I don't know how many more years she will live and each year this truth gnaws at me. I would love to have a real mom and I miss who I (mistakenly) thought she was... calling her would be fruitless and self-harming; I know this and so I'm watching these videos to reassure myself I'm doing the right thing. Still, it hurts.
@gigiarmany4332
@gigiarmany4332 11 ай бұрын
best wishes..🖤🙏🏽
@christinalw19
@christinalw19 11 ай бұрын
My mother lived to be 101. Only the good die young. You will not have the mother you wanted, but I pray you have learned the healthy way to be. I took care of my mother for ten years before she passed. 6 years on hospice. I had no tears, but relief. I prayed for God to be merciful. All I said was “poor mother.” Enabling & negligent, & that was toward my brothers. I never needed her after age 18, and got nothing from her. Blessings, let it go. 🙏🏼🤍🕊
@pollinationfarms
@pollinationfarms 11 ай бұрын
It’s not you fault and nothing to feel bad over accept that that’s one of the main ways they brainwash us is by always making us feel bad , so don’t feel bad feel glad if you can ❤
@m998hmmwv7
@m998hmmwv7 11 ай бұрын
She's 92? Grow a pair and give her a call.
@maritzacaruth9283
@maritzacaruth9283 11 ай бұрын
I'm sorry this is a rough time. We are so very fortunate Danish is here daily, helping us make sense of what we're seeing. If she's not senile or suffering with dementia, I bet she already knows how much you care about this date 🗓. Sometimes it's purely the thought that counts. Hang in there.🙏 💗
@BellMarell
@BellMarell 11 ай бұрын
They themselves are nothing but a lie, so they need you to believe in them in order to exist. Wow, so well put. Spot on. 💯
@petrosspetrosgali
@petrosspetrosgali 11 ай бұрын
Danish succinctly describes a demon when he describes the narcissist. This is no coincidence.
@almohvn33
@almohvn33 11 ай бұрын
THEY ARE DEMON FILLED!!!!! Satan's babies.....
@relied7934
@relied7934 11 ай бұрын
Imagine feeling like you don't exist without applause. That's horrible.
@dihydrogenmonoxide7056
@dihydrogenmonoxide7056 10 ай бұрын
@@relied7934 They do this to their kids also. They create a false identity for each child. One of these is "golden child," and another is "scapegoat." One allows them to be a hero, and the other allows them to be the victim. Narcissists unexist their children and replace them with puppets. There are "two" of me: me and the one my mother "sees." I am still figuring out the first one, since "me" wasn't allowed to exist growing up. I am 41.
@alden547
@alden547 10 ай бұрын
​@@dihydrogenmonoxide7056may peace rest within you ❤
@truthh8597
@truthh8597 11 ай бұрын
umm I disagree on one point majorly.. narcissists are actually VERY ADAPTABLE like chameleons that seem to fit in everywhere they go they also have 90% of the people around them charmed and wrapped around their finger only the ones they target are abused
@danilaroche1156
@danilaroche1156 11 ай бұрын
That type of 'adaptability ' is not real. It's self serving.
@fainitesbarley2245
@fainitesbarley2245 11 ай бұрын
It often doesn’t last.
@kingbellnox
@kingbellnox 11 ай бұрын
That can only change colors...(by coping thouse around them) not ways. Throw a chameleon in a dessert and see how he die trying to adapt Adaptability Is More than just colors!! smh
@th3azscorpio
@th3azscorpio 10 ай бұрын
Sociopaths. Not narcissist.
@danilaroche1156
@danilaroche1156 10 ай бұрын
@@th3azscorpio I agree. Dangerous people.
@rebeccadirks5385
@rebeccadirks5385 10 ай бұрын
1. Unable to be truly grateful and thankful 2. Lack of Adaptability 3. Inability to be Authentic 4. Do not have independence 5. They are not able to listen to Care about you with genuine concern
@annaburns2865
@annaburns2865 11 ай бұрын
“They see themselves as the trash they treat you as. “ once again, he’s knocking it out of the park!
@TheMaestroOfMortification.
@TheMaestroOfMortification. 11 ай бұрын
Without emotional empathy there is no unconditional love.
@carolyn5666
@carolyn5666 11 ай бұрын
this is 100% true....self victimization feeds their dissatisfaction!
@L.Fontein7
@L.Fontein7 11 ай бұрын
Without it there's no love period.
@Lightboltmotivationofficial
@Lightboltmotivationofficial 11 ай бұрын
But they don’t have 😢
@devtest8078
@devtest8078 4 ай бұрын
Most human love is confitional, no?
@carparthero
@carparthero 11 ай бұрын
narcissists are also doomed to fail at: -being able to self-reflect -ceasing to be a coward. -having empathy -admitting mistakes and learning from them cheers from southern ontario, canada 🍁
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
Cheers! 😂 I agree! In a nutshell, doom and gloom describes the narcissists I've ever known. Rhetorically speaking, why can't the narcissist spin a positive note away from their inner darkness and mental illness? It's quite baffling to wonder about.🤪
@carparthero
@carparthero 11 ай бұрын
@@norcal1009 thanks for your kind words. a narcissist being happy is so temporary. it's like pouring water into a cup with a hole at the bottom. there is no amount of effort, resources, energy you can put into them that would make them happy or satisfied. -all the best, steven.
@L.Fontein7
@L.Fontein7 11 ай бұрын
Yes, all of the above. The coward part was something I discovered only recently.
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
@d.schubert2526 😆 it's being able to detect their nuances when they are least aware you're paying attention. 🤣💞
@carparthero
@carparthero 11 ай бұрын
@@L.Fontein7 when the narcissist cannot control you (meaning you have seen them for who they truly are), they will try to control how others see you. so, be prepared for the smear campaign. -stay strong, steven
@lauraneu6582
@lauraneu6582 11 ай бұрын
“There’s no one home and you need to accept that”
@Majsztrik
@Majsztrik 10 ай бұрын
100 percent. And they can never commit to even a certain day being somewhere at a certain time if it’s not what they want to do. I saw a t-shirt that describes this perfectly. “I’m late because I don’t want to be here.” That is my narcissist.
@georgiafrancis9059
@georgiafrancis9059 10 ай бұрын
right, any conversation is a jet plane flying overhead - because THEY know it all and you are a no-nothing, nobody.
@cletiawilliams1436
@cletiawilliams1436 7 ай бұрын
😂 I experienced that with narcs they repeat the same things. Like they're stuck on repeat in life.
@francesbernard2445
@francesbernard2445 7 ай бұрын
Harder to remember that when that house is big as a palace with more than one serving them there at the time.
@Kim-fu1vn
@Kim-fu1vn 4 ай бұрын
Lack of empathy joy authentic. Etc Empty. They drain u to. Such a sick state...I am sick rite now....I need help there is more than one playing with me. I'm done they have won. They got my car off the road, they have stole every last preces of paper that proves who I am. My ID is gone.... this is Kim coronato. 733 shore walk Lindenhurst ny 11757.
@flowerchild89
@flowerchild89 11 ай бұрын
I always look forward to Danish's videos 😊!! My narcissistic mother never had a sense of self. She acted like whomever she was around.( Even toxic people). She is a chameleon. And a rattlesnake!!!🐍 But she acted a different way with me behind closed doors. I could never trust her. I never will. I feel like I don't know her at all. I've been NC with her as of May 2022.
@maggiesalle2256
@maggiesalle2256 11 ай бұрын
Congratulations!
@freud5898
@freud5898 11 ай бұрын
@emilyannam8003, you are so enlightened to recognize the lack of a sense of self in a narcissistic mother. It is almost scary to be around them knowing they will take off on the next emotional whim and leave you in the dust of their emotional change. In my case, my mother was educated herself, but now hated education. She sent me to school with holes in my shoes, no paper/pencils, etc. The teachers would ask other students to give me supplies for tests. In Mama's later life, she had opportunity to become friends with those same teachers. Now, they were the finest people on earth, her dear friends, who worked hard to attain their college degrees, aren't they wonderful, etc. In the meantime, I worked two jobs and spent eleven years getting 3 college degrees. I was terrible/shouldn't be attending worldly colleges/was looking for an easy living because I was too lazy to work on a real job, etc. All this happened at the same time, and it was very confusing to me even as an adult. When she was with those teachers, they were wonderful. When she was with me, I was terrible -- all in the same day. That comes from a lack of a basic sense of self.
@baisalimitra4865
@baisalimitra4865 11 ай бұрын
​@@freud5898plz go no contact with her. Just leave her and start a new life. Don't let her evil shadow cast darkness on your life.
@RonSafreed
@RonSafreed 11 ай бұрын
I had to evict my narc. brother in Apr 2021 & I have been NC since, even have locks & chains on my gates because he has trespassed onto my property according to neighbors!!
@kelvinhandley8141
@kelvinhandley8141 11 ай бұрын
7:09
@raykabre4928
@raykabre4928 10 ай бұрын
I never knew such a person existed. We got married and 3 months in....the mask fell. Everything you mentioned in this video happened. Needless to say after noticing the " narc patterns "to include the black colored eyes. I healed within the relationship and filed for divorced after 9 months. No way I was staying in that marriage. I was an empath and I went supernova on him. He can't even hover me😂. My spirit and his demons can not coexist in the same space. I win!! I thank the new supply everyday for my escape😊
@jeanpaul4100
@jeanpaul4100 10 ай бұрын
If it's your first narc it can be quite shocking to realize that people like this exist. They are everywhere now. All over the world.
@raykabre4928
@raykabre4928 10 ай бұрын
@@jeanpaul4100 it was! But I am so glad I saw it for what it was. Being a spiritual being, I ask God to reveal to me what that demonic spirit was. Of course I was scrolling through KZbin one day after that and the rest was history. It was spiritual warfare and I knew the only way to break free was to wait until it latched on to the new supply. We cannot and will not exist in the same space. I pray that others have the strength to leave...some aren't that lucky.
@quasimodo614
@quasimodo614 9 ай бұрын
Yes there is definitely demonic in there. I discovered the narcissist spirit when watching a channel called Marc the messenger. It’s helped greatly to understand as my mum is a narcissist and my husband has one latched on him at work. Know thy enemy is a must. Peace and blessing to you, so glad you got out fairly quickly 🙏🙏🙏
@truescotsman4103
@truescotsman4103 8 ай бұрын
The majority of humans on this planet are very sick​@@jeanpaul4100
@nicholecornes1915
@nicholecornes1915 5 ай бұрын
Thats AWSOME you caught that early! Praise God... hell no light and darkness can't co exist
@shamailaahmed7442
@shamailaahmed7442 11 ай бұрын
Gosh, this was really informative, because I just could not understand why someone was unable to empathise with others or why someone would enjoy seeing people suffer. I learnt a lot from your videos, and learnt to accept there are truly horrible people on earth that can't be helped no matter what
@mikimiki6202
@mikimiki6202 10 ай бұрын
Sad. I wondered that myself. Scary
@dianadenman5637
@dianadenman5637 11 ай бұрын
My X made me feel that it was my job to make sure the entire universe worked well for him. I was blamed for EVERYTHING that he was unhappy about. I was very young. After 13 years of trying to "measure up" , I ran away. I couldn't just walk out the door. He controlled EVERYTHING. 40 years later, I've never remarried. To this day, he blames me as the reason his life is so unhappy, in spite of having another wife and many resources from his family. (I "wasted his youth") This kind of info was not available so many decades ago. Thank you so much for such a clear & concise explanation.
@Rosalie-ct8mi
@Rosalie-ct8mi 11 ай бұрын
marriage is not a guarantee for a happy life. I just want to have nice friends and I will see what happens, but to live by yourself without stress from your narcissitic husband is very very relaxing and so peaceful. Being happy and peaceful is something very important and nowadays there are so many narcissists with all the social media......
@georgiafrancis9059
@georgiafrancis9059 10 ай бұрын
Me too, although I walked out at 11 years, then he became by stalker.
@emmagrove6491
@emmagrove6491 10 ай бұрын
My sister is a narcissist, and I can tell you from experience that the only solution is to run far, far away and don't look back. Don't trust them, don't listen to them, don't get sucked in. You could literally end up dead. And that's not a dramatic exaggeration. That's a warning.
@arianstiebs6619
@arianstiebs6619 5 ай бұрын
So true...
@sarthakkrishna4238
@sarthakkrishna4238 2 ай бұрын
You are a really dramatic person
@Isabela2024-yr
@Isabela2024-yr 11 ай бұрын
Knowing the narcissist through and through, I learned not to expect anything from him. He lives like debris floating in the air, but I don't give a damn about it. I love myself first before anything else.
@joseenoel8093
@joseenoel8093 11 ай бұрын
They fail at destroying us, they can keep being demons to and for themselves, we've high self-esteems made by us for ourselves!
@etaokha4164
@etaokha4164 11 ай бұрын
I remember I bought myself a shoe and asked him what do you think of it? The look on his face said it all and he made a slight comment of "hmm its nice " and he didn't speak to me when i wore my shoe to go out until we got home and i took it off then he spoke to me. This people are cowards like weak cowards. When he discarded me and he missed our son hospital appointment I went no contact and after i went no contact, he didn't try to even know how his child was doing or try to find out if the child misses him or not. Not a single care in the world about the child and he has gladly moved on to another relationship. I feel sorry for him because not only is he a loser but a parasite who cant survive without being around people to leash on. They are parasites
@rawthe
@rawthe 7 ай бұрын
How was he supposed to ask about his son after you went "no contact"?
@VampBalletDancer
@VampBalletDancer 4 ай бұрын
Thank you for sharing your experience. I'm saddened to hear that there was no care for the child on the narcist's end, but it is for the best the narcist will not be present. I genuinely think survivors calling narcissists parasites is being too generous. In nature parasites have a purpose and generally, they do not wish to harm their hosts. Narcists are dangerous to their victims (the host) and they do not care for the survival of the life they drain. Narcists are lesser life than even a parasite in my eyes.
@zellerized
@zellerized 3 ай бұрын
​@@rawthe Pick up the phone, jack
@juanderuano8969
@juanderuano8969 11 ай бұрын
Great video, I was in a beautiful marriage before my now ex wife left me,i still love her and most times i cant stop thinking about her, i am doing my very best to get rid of the thought of her, but i just cant, i love her so much, i dont know why i am bring this here for, i cant stop thinking about her
@juanderuano8969
@juanderuano8969 11 ай бұрын
wow, how did you get a spiritual adviser, and how do i reach her?
@juanderuano8969
@juanderuano8969 11 ай бұрын
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive.
@tamihunt3659
@tamihunt3659 11 ай бұрын
Never follows thru with anything
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
But they sure know how to start things with no direction, just making it up as they go while not letting anyone stand in the way of their chaotic obsessions.
@aliraelei3313
@aliraelei3313 7 ай бұрын
So true I agree with you.
@susanbenson3232
@susanbenson3232 10 ай бұрын
Having lived with a narcissistic mom &, then a spouse, for all of my 61 yrs, & not knowing why I felt so bad, & struggled with depression & anxiety, I can tell you this is true! I didn't realize they were both covert narcissists until the last yr. Knowing has helped me finally start to find healing. For many yrs, I thought I could love them more or better, & they'd treat me better. Nope. Thank you for your videos. I'm getting help from you, & others on KZbin, & support from other people who've also been victims of narc abuse!
@gordonwillard4872
@gordonwillard4872 9 ай бұрын
I will be 61 in 3 weeks and in the same boat as you. What an absolute shame. I am just so grateful now that I am learning “ what the heck happened “!! I went “ no contact” a year ago before understanding what “ no contact” actually was. I love my own children unconditionally and feel it would be impossible not to!! My narcissistic mother has ruined so many lives and has left a wake of destruction and dysfunction! I am soooo grateful to have finally found information to help heal from this terrible situation. I have two older sisters who are a complete mess, who are still hopeful for their mothers love “ trauma bond” Both of them have been married and divorced at least once. One live on welfare and is obese and the other is in a permanent state of depression! I have an abusive hateful older brother who I had to cut out of my life at the same time as our mother “ golden child” ( also a narcissist). He has never been married and has no children, thank God! My other brother I instinctively cut out of my life because of his violent rhetoric about our dysfunctional family every time he was with me! I separated from him so as to not “ infect” my children with his dysfunctional trauma! That was 15 years ago, and solely to protect my children from his uncontrollable rage!! He was the main “ scapegoat” and was married and divorced 3 times. He has two children whom he has zero relationship with! Unbelievable! What a mess! My biggest regret is that it took me this long to see it all for what it is. The grieving of my family’s “death”was very painful and caused me to be physically ill for months. It still hurts incredibly. However, I have started to heal and am very grateful for that. I am most grateful for the unconditional love that I have for my children! ❤️. I can’t imagine having children and feeling nothing, or worse yet, actually loathing them!! Scapegoat no more!! ☮️
@susanbenson3232
@susanbenson3232 9 ай бұрын
@@gordonwillard4872 I'm so very sorry this has been your experience as well. Narcissism is incredibly destructive. I hope & pray you continue to find healing & healthy, loving relationships.
@casschadwick5819
@casschadwick5819 8 ай бұрын
The 42 years of my marriage have been just this awful. I guess the real question is why have I stayed? Oh. The kids…the retirement money…it all sucks.
@susanbenson3232
@susanbenson3232 8 ай бұрын
@@casschadwick5819 the lost years are a huge part of the grieving. We do what we can, when we can. Part of healing, for me, is learning to be kind to myself. I wish the same for you.
@JF32304
@JF32304 7 ай бұрын
They feed off emotions, this in turn will drain you and it'll never be enough for them. A black hole for emotions... Disgusting!
@daynapeterson9033
@daynapeterson9033 11 ай бұрын
I see these traits in a friend. She's always leaving husbands; always finding new husbands; talks the husbands into moving to newer homes, and a year later she wants a different home; has to go on a big trip every 3 months and changes jobs often and is now unemployed but still wants a new house. This current husband jumps through hoops. So sad.
@petrosspetrosgali
@petrosspetrosgali 11 ай бұрын
Her name isn’t karen or Kara is it?
@danilaroche1156
@danilaroche1156 11 ай бұрын
Then why are you friends?
@mikimiki6202
@mikimiki6202 10 ай бұрын
They claim men love trash, oops....I mean a challenge
@mikimiki6202
@mikimiki6202 10 ай бұрын
​@danilaroche1156 I have a couple of these friends from childhood. They're more like aquantances these days. We aren't quite aware as kids, what they are yet. I become aware of what a narcissist is within the last couple of years and have distanced myself from one of them. Anyone with true experience with a narcissist, should understand how difficult it can be to separate from these people. Baby steps. The husband jumper mentioned in this post, may have a few more issues interlinked with her narcissism. One of the ladies I mention, was physically abusive to her boyfriends back in the day. The men absolutely loved her, she could have did anything and they would've asked for seconds. I was baffled back then🤷‍♀️ crazy world
@nicolecarnevale3226
@nicolecarnevale3226 10 ай бұрын
Karen? Can you explain?
@velvetgardenia
@velvetgardenia 11 ай бұрын
Just saved to my Best of the best folder. Thanks, Danish. I always enjoy, learn from, and find reassurance in your videos.
@actionpls.
@actionpls. 5 ай бұрын
Being with a narcissist is a heartache. No matter how much love you show them. They can't retain any of their relationships. But, stil never look at themselves as the problem.
@masztaarc
@masztaarc 11 ай бұрын
I have to say that my narcissistic father is highly competent, a life long medical doctor. He uses that to feed his ego, telling us that we aren't educated like he is and therefore our opinions don't count (even if the subject has nothing to do with healthcare). Went no contact a couple of weeks ago at age 39. Should have done it 15 years ago.
@sapusatestokje2451
@sapusatestokje2451 11 ай бұрын
Relatable. I decided tonight to go no contact. Fuck mate...
@masztaarc
@masztaarc 11 ай бұрын
I'm on week 3 now and the best advice I can give when it comes to mindset (this far, I'm new to this as well) is that you don't think about this as a temporary fight/disagreement you had with your narcissist. You have to realize it's unfixable, even if the current problem gets solved there will be a new conflict within a month or two. They don't change and in my experience they only get worse. It gets easier knowing that, because you know that your anger or forgiveness towards them for the latest thing won't matter to anyone except you. It's a terrible situation to be in, but cutting them off is the only solution I can think of that doesn't involve compromising our soul further. I've had to say and do things that are truly demeaning to myself and others in order to just keep the peace, including throwing my own brother under the bus just to avoid conflict. Pretending to agree and even add to the narcissist's view in order to gain momentary favor, things that go against my nature. These people have no bottom level. There's nothing they won't say to get their supply. Both you and I will be better off going no contact.@@sapusatestokje2451
@sapusatestokje2451
@sapusatestokje2451 11 ай бұрын
@@masztaarc yes i understand. what made me finally decide, is that they litteraly cannot be forgiven. in order to be forgiven you have do admit wrong. and thus, never being wrong ofcourse, the narc just keeps on going, scratching on it forever. history the same as the future. they can do no wrong. personally, i think there is a whole deeper layer to them. some demonic entity switched places with them. there is nothing left inside, but a beast. their soul gone, in the abyss. the faith of this demon. and the demon gets to live in the body for a while. it uses memories of the person they once were as a mask. thats why when the mask goes off, they are nothing but filth. and why ,to many, it seems so believable. its just a hollowed out mask with somethin else inside. and here we are, we cut off these beasts. been used for them to switch places AGAIN, we suffered the torment, that was THEIRS. untill we get rid of em for good.
@karamlevi
@karamlevi 10 ай бұрын
Send him a card once a year and aim at the will. Don’t offend him. Also don’t suck up. Find a real complement and put that in the card. Keep no contact otherwise, and work on your money and self in all ways and keep going. Your being brave and strong and it the wisest of choices you have made. I’m part Jewish and my father is more Jewish then I am, and he tells me I’m less special ect for many reasons but that blood thing is a part of it, plus his wealth and many buildings he’s made in the world. They want to eclipse your value 24/7/365 as I’m sure your horrifically aware. Good job on your choice and always remember what you want to say will never ever be wanted to be heard by him. Play your role at a distance and use excuses but stay in contact like 1 time a year and maybe on the birthday. Think of it as a life tax. Your paying tax with goal of gaining wealth. Act pro. It’s a job. It’s like a long term investment. Your meeting with a client. Act like that. Why? Cus that’s the truth… That is the only good that’s open to actually have. All else will suck you in and harm you. This is high strategy and you know what? They like it. They like being treated like that. Yes they will mis going crazy on you… but they do respect those that act like this. I’m 48, my father just died @ 83 a few months ago. Request a copy of the will now. Do it. Get things ironed out. You can send him a copy of your will. Trigger reciprocated actions. When he’s dead… you will still be healing from these abuses. The money is neutral. It has no enemy. You want that blessing it’s it’s available. Okay bro. Take care-
@darshanagupta9741
@darshanagupta9741 10 ай бұрын
I went no contact around the same age. To our surprise, he died in 3 years after that.
@zandatee
@zandatee 11 ай бұрын
The main thing - to LOVE. Also feel genuine joy - from music, nature, just out of nothing. This is observing my Covert narcissist mother.
@Rosalie-ct8mi
@Rosalie-ct8mi 11 ай бұрын
exactly! My mother always needed to do some household chores and could never be relaxed and enjoy things, they ARE not joyful people!
@gonzaga45377
@gonzaga45377 11 ай бұрын
You are right! My husband can never enjoy anything beautiful anywhere. He always has something negative to say and will try to ruin moments for me. He tries but I will not let him. I tell him occasionally that I know exactly who he is and what he is about. Strangely, he will just leave me alone after that comment.
@zandatee
@zandatee 11 ай бұрын
@@gonzaga45377 I guess to a real narc you can not say it. Just leave and not look back. Before I went no contact with mother, I told her that she looks young and I feel sad and all such stuff. And just run away. Just days later I started to search for information and found out all this from medical side. She just bacame more and more extreme and strange. Thats how I discovered and started to seriously investigate. Real medical NPD of course is not just a nasty character. Its an illness. Which is also my mothers case.
@Ksahdia
@Ksahdia 11 ай бұрын
I recognize a lot from my childhood and married life. I have narcissists in my family (no surprise that ex was one too, my parents married me off to their own family member). Some years ago I learnt about narcissists for the first time online and it explained so much of what was done to me. Anyway, years ago, there were many online explanations and definitions, but there weren't many tips and online coaches teaches us how to deal with this. I'm grateful that now there are. Knowing and understanding what happened, also helps to heal and to avoid going through similar things again. Thank you for that.
@RonSafreed
@RonSafreed 11 ай бұрын
Even decades ago, there was "nothing" talked about narcissism & for many years I was banging my head against a wall & it was taking a toll on me & my life & my father & a younger brother were both narcs. & my poor mother was abused by both of them & the shock & trauma of seeing that!!
@Cat-oj4oz
@Cat-oj4oz 10 ай бұрын
This is my story, too... I went through years of therapy, but it wasn't until I heard about narcissism about two years ago that it finally "clicked" on what I was dealing with, that I was not alone, and that learning to say "NO" was imperative. The knowledge and power I've gotten through these lessons is staggering, and I am so grateful. Bless you!
@Ksahdia
@Ksahdia 10 ай бұрын
@@Cat-oj4oz ❤
@atticusandnofriends8481
@atticusandnofriends8481 10 ай бұрын
I love your description of a narcissist "there's no one home" that's an excellent description. Of all the description of a narcissist I've heard that nails it. Nothing else needs to be said. That's it in a nut shell. No pun intended. 😊
@architgupta9082
@architgupta9082 11 ай бұрын
Constant dissatisfaction... Never being satisfied... Thanklessness... Complaining... This breaks the normal partner narc has... Sad..
@freedomwarrior5087
@freedomwarrior5087 11 ай бұрын
Yup, the superficial show is a house of cards, the lights are on but no one is home.
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
Narcissistic superficiality reminds me of the idiotic 'people who live in glass houses' saying, that stupidly makes the suggestion that we're all the same no matter what our faults. It is wrong and lacking integrity to say that all people in society are somehow equal in their deceptions and flaws. 🤪
@jenniferarnold-delgado3489
@jenniferarnold-delgado3489 11 ай бұрын
Danish you have lifted me into a more understanding level of what I dealt with and am dealing with - the calmness that you approach this is extremely helpful to me personally . I have been able to really see it all clearly , and not let it make me stop being the person I am , which is a compassionate friend and loyal family member . Keep doing the very good work you are doing , it is helping me , and I am sure many others .
@carriejoza6192
@carriejoza6192 11 ай бұрын
Very nice comment. I agree with you.
@mariaridler1831
@mariaridler1831 11 ай бұрын
Lovely ☺️
@ericb8413
@ericb8413 11 ай бұрын
You’re a genius Danish. You describe things I couldn’t put into words. Thank you 😊
@crismendoza7206
@crismendoza7206 11 ай бұрын
Biggest coward on the planet. 😢😮
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
Yep, and most likely, all narcissists are the biggest cowards on the planet, and this reality is hidden deep inside them all.
@lindadavis9789
@lindadavis9789 11 ай бұрын
I agree totally. No accountability. Like an empty vessel that feels nothing
@jennywrenn469
@jennywrenn469 10 ай бұрын
Mine feels 1 thing- sorry for herself
@jackiepowell7513
@jackiepowell7513 10 ай бұрын
Empty clouds without water. Kjv Bible
@jennywrenn469
@jennywrenn469 10 ай бұрын
@@jackiepowell7513 Amen to that
@Wherethereisnodarkness
@Wherethereisnodarkness 8 ай бұрын
You mean they aren't feeling the way you want them to feel. They feel lots of things. If not, then how are they capable of constantly victimising themselves?
@LightsVancouver
@LightsVancouver 11 ай бұрын
every 6 months his personality would change, everytime his family came to visit - he would change deep down.
@moonlightstargem1006
@moonlightstargem1006 11 ай бұрын
He was wearing different masks
@cassien7585
@cassien7585 11 ай бұрын
My inlaws are narcs. I worry about what happens when one of them passes. They are each other's biggest enablers. What happens when you don't have the supply, the protection of an enabler. My FIL will collapse if his wife goes first. She literally does everything for him. I'm worried he'll become more a demon than he already is.
@lucyt-c8092
@lucyt-c8092 11 ай бұрын
can YOU ( and your spouse - their child ) MOVE ? very fat away before either one passes?
@cassien7585
@cassien7585 11 ай бұрын
@@lucyt-c8092 we live severalmstates away
@georgiafrancis9059
@georgiafrancis9059 10 ай бұрын
If you're lucky, they will go together! That's what I'm hoping with the narcs in my life.
@mvbigmagic4048
@mvbigmagic4048 10 ай бұрын
It is scary. My mom is a narcissist and my dad is her enabler. He is on hospice, and ever since he was put on hospice in June, my mother has been a stark raving terror of a narcissist. She has dementia, and will not seek help, and is doing all sorts of bizarre things. Stress makes dementia symptoms worse. So add dementia + narcissism.... it's like a demoness on steroids.
@dextermorganbloodspattersp6382
@dextermorganbloodspattersp6382 11 ай бұрын
This .."Champion" Champion 🏆 Danish .. Is Now My Adopted Brother 🦅 The advice , guidance ... and Overstanding bestowd on me from my Brother.🦅 Massive 🦅 Respect With the Eagle for Danish 🏆 Champion As With Dr. Ramani 🦅 I'll address Danish 🦅in this Manner.... 🦅🏆😎
@leefossett5777
@leefossett5777 10 ай бұрын
I would love to see someone really confront my narcissistic stepmother so she couldn’t pull her shit just once, just once. Once, when a reporter was doing a story on her business, she asked to see it and REWROTE it! Total control, total. It gets old, really old. I went no contact before I even knew what she was and I’m so proud of myself for distancing myself from her even though I lost my extended family in the process. I think they’re slowly coming around because of her insatiable needs. So evil. Thanks 4 your insight.
@blue.5058
@blue.5058 11 ай бұрын
Very informative video. One thing about the “desire of perfection” narcissists expect, though- They only expect perfection from others. They rarely expect it from themselves. If anything, their highly-entitled nature dictates that they are immune from what they expect from others. I can remember times when I would get admonished by my narc father from the slightest variation in task, even resulting in screaming matches. But he can practically slack off on anything and it would be a complete non-issue. They simply don’t feel they’re subject to the same scrutiny as others.
@Scott-n2x1j
@Scott-n2x1j 5 ай бұрын
My dad also, he was a p.o.s. who would do the same to me and also had that same "immunity" because he is he
@jp4163
@jp4163 8 ай бұрын
"There is no one home." That is so true.
@gretenaaden7613
@gretenaaden7613 11 ай бұрын
Super! 'My' narc is now complitely n a k e d! He is an empty box. And I am really happy to see and know.
@L.Fontein7
@L.Fontein7 11 ай бұрын
Yes. Recently, CN and I were sitting on the couch watching TV and I glanced over and saw his silhouette as he was looking straight ahead at the TV. And it hit me: 'My god, he's empty inside...there's nothing IN there. He's totally empty inside.' It was chilling.
@elliewegman1846
@elliewegman1846 11 ай бұрын
It is not just the welcome words and personality of Danish that is awesome, it is also the people who follow/subscribed and comment. Believe me, and I've followed, now unfollowed, quite a few. When you pour your heart out, and six months later not one person has recognised your pain and taken the time to press a little like of support, then you know there is something really wrong going on. Just another enlightening moment on the road to self recovery. Danish, you and your followers are awesome.
@dextermorganbloodspattersp6382
@dextermorganbloodspattersp6382 11 ай бұрын
Your Words 🦅 Ring True ... Massive 🦅 Respect for You , Your Comment and This Community 🦅🏆😎
@pollinationfarms
@pollinationfarms 11 ай бұрын
Aww 🥰 thanks!! That’s so sweet of you to acknowledge and I accept ❤ you are so right 🤩 and you are amazing too!
@lennie1703
@lennie1703 11 ай бұрын
The comment section to Danish's videos make it a conference of minds. I struggle to put it all into words myself, so it's so heartening to see others agreeing that our shared experiences are not acceptable. Way beyond acceptable and we're right to think that. There is no negotiation with pure evil. Validation of that principle is whst I find here.❤
@pollinationfarms
@pollinationfarms 11 ай бұрын
@@lennie1703 we are never alone , we are all one , we all do deserve better ❤️ and nothing wrong with wanting what’s yours …Joy and Happiness
@mariaridler1831
@mariaridler1831 11 ай бұрын
Great comment. I feel so much support from Danish but also from all of you out there - you help me make sense of my feelings and the chaos. Thank you all and God bless 🙏💕
@hermymojica3957
@hermymojica3957 11 ай бұрын
3 VALUES THAT NARCISSIST CANNOT OVERCOME: 1. FEAR OF GOD 2. DISCIPLINE 3. OBEDIENCE
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
That's great 👍 I always felt there was something missing with every encounter, decision, conversation, and past experiences with narcissists.
@zandatee
@zandatee 11 ай бұрын
not English speaking so not sure I understood you right. But my Covert narc. mother is desperately disciplined and obedient. Because she has to hold this image - what others will think- so she is like a perfect robot.
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
​@@zandatee4. Perfection. I saw that perfection in narcissists can be debilitating to themselves and others.
@leanne123
@leanne123 11 ай бұрын
What about THE LAW. My brother is squirming like a pig right now. He's about to be exposed. His pathetic attempts to hide are so obvious. He even has my mother writing letters to my lawyer using his words. Lol. Good luck with that bro. I'm not giving up. 😂
@hepzirose
@hepzirose 11 ай бұрын
They act like they fear God and they are so perfect to the outside world but inside the home they are devils
@LK-sk2wv
@LK-sk2wv 11 ай бұрын
Do they even know that they’re narcissistic? Do they plan all of this in advance? Do they even realise what they’re doing or is a narcissist completely self absorbed, and has no empathy at all? Because they do feel love, and surely they’d want to be happy in their relationships. I don’t understand, can a narcissist ever change and feel genuine empathy and compassion? And is it possible to develop narcissistic traits through something or someone, how does a narcissist become a narcissist? Will a narcissist ever self reflect and admit to themselves that they’re narcissistic, or have certain traits? I don’t get how a person can be so loving one day and so nasty and spiteful the next, over unnecessary things. I don’t get the desire to put people down and devalue people, where does that even come from?
@norcal1009
@norcal1009 11 ай бұрын
It takes a lot to understand from a narcissist's perspective. I learn from watching these videos because I can relate to almost everything here based on my past relationships with narcissists. It's extremely helpful and validating all at the same time. I hope you are able to watch more of these videos because the insight they provide is invaluable to the topic at hand. The presentation is factual and well read from research and experience. A great A+ KZbin channel on the pathology of narcissistic personality disorder.😊❤️🎗
@LK-sk2wv
@LK-sk2wv 11 ай бұрын
@@norcal1009 I can also relate, but I’m still in the relationship, or early stages of separation. I’ve watched a few of these videos already and you’re right, they’re very insightful and at the same time scary as it like he’s describing my whole relationship, all my thoughts and feelings of self worth, invisibility, always being the cause of every issue, the deflection etc. I’ve been married for 6 years and it’s been very toxic. However through every break/separation we’ve had I’ve done a lot of self reflection, and I can’t work out if I’m also a narcissist. Everything is just so confusing right now. And it’s so sad to love someone and be treated so badly by them, to feel so completely devalued. it’s like a one sided relationship. Thank you for your input, I’ll keep watching and hopefully will gain some clarity.
@terrylynndelman
@terrylynndelman 11 ай бұрын
I asked the same questions a couple years ago. In 2 years, I have come to accept these truths: Narcs never change No contact is necessary in order to completely heal.
@lennie1703
@lennie1703 11 ай бұрын
I hate to say it, and I hated to hear it myself from others: They DO NOT LOVE YOU. They can't feel love, it would be a burden, a distraction, and take from their needs and wants.
@LK-sk2wv
@LK-sk2wv 11 ай бұрын
@@lennie1703as hurtful as it is, you’re right. And I’m only here now as other have noticed that he’s only around when there’s no issues, in times of life’s difficulties he’s elsewhere and it’s all my fault, I’m the one that pushed him away. It’s all so unjust. I don’t understand how a person, a fellow human being can operate in this manner.
@user-q992
@user-q992 10 ай бұрын
My mother was like this. I had to flee the country and cut almost all contact with her just to survive. She was trying to chase me all her life through her brothers and sisters ( to whom she had lied about me and made them also hate me ). Finally I had to distance myself from them too. I have never seen such jealous people in my life.
@FirstLove_111
@FirstLove_111 11 ай бұрын
What a great ministry God gave you exposing the works of the devil!!!🎉
@alicearcturus8610
@alicearcturus8610 11 ай бұрын
Thank you! I hope your life is running smoothly and peacefully. Every thing you said is true.
@biancabianca6800
@biancabianca6800 11 ай бұрын
Master of None 🤣
@BlueleafDanny
@BlueleafDanny 10 ай бұрын
Surviving a childhood of hatred. Experiencing extreme low self worth for most of my life, which caused further suffering and traumatic events. I think the hardest thing was to realize I had to prioritize and protect the kid in me. The kid that was trapped in a living hell. I also have seen karma at work. Let people suffer their choices, don’t save the narcissist. I survived that hellish environment, and they reap now what was sowed.
@marialewis2726
@marialewis2726 11 ай бұрын
You are an AWESOME teacher thank you so much sir you are appreciated God Bless you😁
@naiyalexic
@naiyalexic 10 ай бұрын
Chameleoning isn't necessarily all negative. Reading the room and responding in kind to your social and cultural surroundings is a positive skill, when it's done by someone who's not inherently narcissistic, and when it's not done in a way to get something because of a harmful agenda.
@sirrevzalot
@sirrevzalot 7 ай бұрын
I find you are correct from personal experience. Anti-narcissist KZbin is becoming increasingly trash content. All opinion and argument from authority. If we weren’t adaptable to our social surroundings, we wouldn’t be a social species.
@kleogaruda815
@kleogaruda815 2 ай бұрын
They referring to usual 24/7 chMelon not normal people adaptation
@deela262
@deela262 11 ай бұрын
We have to try HARD to shed that aversion from our hearts. Otherwise we are forever victims, and who knows, might become narcs in our old age. Wanting things to happen our desired way and wanting to control the undesirable, wanting only the good things, wanting others to like us , wa ting perfect life...are all bad traits in the long run.
@sandy-pf9bb
@sandy-pf9bb 11 ай бұрын
My parents were both narcissists, one overt, one covert. It has taken me years to begin to recover bc their best thing was to make me believe all the chaos was my fault. I have felt guilty and worthless every day. Its only been in the last years that I have begun to see. This video is the most accurate one I've ever seen. If I could have known these things years ago, maybe i could have escaped without permanent damage. You do have to escape bc nothing you do will make it better. They think so differently than we do and they are completely unable and unwilling to change. This video is just so true, thank you.
@jewelwinter734
@jewelwinter734 11 ай бұрын
wow he speaks the truth about my mom but I face that it's true ❤️
@africandreamsinhaze365
@africandreamsinhaze365 11 ай бұрын
If this video right here does not make you feel like running as far away from a narcissist as fast as you can, I don't know what will...
@gfunkera69
@gfunkera69 11 ай бұрын
Jesus…I could’ve been the one speaking in this video to describe my ex 😮 word for word…problem is we have a child together which breaks my heart ☹️ she gets her supply from him now rather than me. A collector of useful people. If you’re not useful to them, you’re discarded.
@theunknowngamer5477
@theunknowngamer5477 11 ай бұрын
This lecture has me truly wide awake....Number 3 really tears me a new awareness. Living in a zone of survival where the next five minutes is a miracle or hell, my thoughts fall into a pit of gravity. Hearing someone say the words, with the info unable to be whole from my inside self....Thank You ! Describing this allowed level of mental illness as existing, way past anything authentically Human...2ND Thanks. The use and abandonment of sympathy/empathy, only a Monster does that.
@KAT-wo1js
@KAT-wo1js 10 ай бұрын
Right! Everything about his character is exactly what you say in all your messages, yet he accused me of being who he is when I am the total opposite. He said I was broken, insecure, and I am a strong, intelligent, and loving women. I got rid of him quickly. Sometimes while arouns him, I would actually feel a pressing in my body, like my spirit was trying to push out. It was like waking on eggshells with him, but he said he felt that way with me. I got tired of the lies, accusations, his disappearing acts, devaluing me, and everything. Towards the end, he would constantly ask me if I thought I was giving him my best, and that I did not know how to love him. I showed him much love, but I realize I was not doing it in the way he wanted. That was to let him control me, cheat on me, devalue me, blame me for his unfair actions, and still love him inspite of. So, maybe he was right. So, I told him to go find someone who will knows how to love him. He took all the furniture he bought for us, at least that is what he said when he bought it. I picked it out, and he bought it. I was a little relunctant to allow that because I have always bought my own furniture and homes. Well, we moved in together, right after I gave my furnitire to my child. I'd had it about 5 yrs and it was still in good shape. I only had mattesses on the floor when he left. Thank God, I have a stable career and I know God will restore me. They do like to see others suffer, but Karma will hit them quickly.
@elliesimpson1313
@elliesimpson1313 11 ай бұрын
I'm a new happy subscriber! You have about the best channel out there. Succinct, to the point, and spot on. You resonate with me on SO many things I experienced for over 30 years ago. God bless you and thank you. 😘
@charissewilliams2515
@charissewilliams2515 11 ай бұрын
This has got to be one of my favorite video from you . When I say each of these points were spot on , thank you for making this channel, it is extremely helpful and I have learned so much , besides realizing in 2021 I had been in a relationship with one for 14 yrs 😢I literally found out recently unfortunately that my brother is one as well and it was devastating. When ever I refer to a narcissist , I call them “not real people “ it is downright disgusting to me the way they are but it gives such clarity after you finally wake up and see what’s really going on . Again thank you for sharing your story and also helping us ❤
@Rosalie-ct8mi
@Rosalie-ct8mi 11 ай бұрын
It really does give you clarity when you know and realize that more family members are narcissitic and that you were never "crazy" as they were always demeaning and criticizing me. Me too I have been in a relationship with an extrovert narcissist who even spit me in the face when he was angry, simply disgusting people. These video's of Danish are so helpful and to read these comments are so comforting as we are not alone with these crazy making people. Take good care of yourself 🌷
@mikimiki6202
@mikimiki6202 10 ай бұрын
I had to double check the name to see if posted this and forgot. Same time frame in relationship, to when finding out to realizing that my brother is one as well. Scary. I pray to God to help us
@charissewilliams2515
@charissewilliams2515 10 ай бұрын
@@Rosalie-ct8mi omg it’s crazy and sooo eye opening and the more you learn the more you can see them coming from a mile away . The disheartening feeling you get when you realize a close family is one of them is insane. I couldn’t agree with you more . Big kind hearted ppl gotta stick together cause I feel like the way the Narcs reproduce in years to come there’s is more of them then us 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️
@charissewilliams2515
@charissewilliams2515 10 ай бұрын
@@mikimiki6202 oh damn 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️that’s crazy yea if I didn’t get close to the mother of his child and his step mother to compare stories I would have never found out but now when I look back at his whole life it is sooooo clear 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️everything makes sense
@SteveJ-o3o
@SteveJ-o3o 10 ай бұрын
My wife has a really difficult time purchasing birthday cards for her narcissistic mother. Cards all say how wonderful their mother is. Her mother is the opposite of what a mother should be. It's really sad. My wife is disappointed every year ! Along with being disappointed through out the entire year of being cheated out of a loving, caring, compassionate mother. I am thankful I was blessed with wonderful parents !
@HameshaSobti
@HameshaSobti 7 ай бұрын
Oh I once got a birthday card from my narc husband that said It’s your birthday. Enjoy ! 🙄
@laurahardgrove955
@laurahardgrove955 7 ай бұрын
Having to find a card for them is awful!
@ginapaschall
@ginapaschall 8 ай бұрын
"There's no one home and you have to accept that." Really good sentence too remember! Thank you!
@priyankachougule8538
@priyankachougule8538 11 ай бұрын
Basically I am calm and awakend person.but still I was struggling for my happiness and calmness due to my mother in law. Danish you r really helped me to ignore narc and I am so much in peace.
@tamihunt3659
@tamihunt3659 11 ай бұрын
Wow i know he wasn't born like this..he says he had a good childhood..that can't be true. A life of lies
@allieeverett9017
@allieeverett9017 11 ай бұрын
I work for a covert narc who swears she had an idyllic childhood...hmmm. really???
@petrosspetrosgali
@petrosspetrosgali 11 ай бұрын
They are all born that way. They are evil
@jmccoomber1659
@jmccoomber1659 10 ай бұрын
Thank you for doing this Danish! I never realized that I was under the control of a narcissist until I finally freed myself. And it was actually them who freed me by finally crossing the line so far that it was impossible to go back. I always prided myself on being my own person, my own boss, but slowly over several years I allowed myself to be completely controlled by this person. As others have mentioned, that person is a snake, a liar, who pretended to be a caring person and was extremely likable and popular among people who didn't really know them. When I finally got my home and my life back, they first tried to "warn" everyone I knew that I was the real liar and thief, and when that didn't work, they started crying (literally) about how badly I treated them! That person would literally have died several times if I had not stepped up and managed medical care for them but when I needed physical and mental healthcare I was treated like I was doing something wrong by going to therapy or the doctor. I think that was when I first realized there was something drastically wrong with that person, when my health didn't matter. It has been more than four years since I have had any contact with that person and I'm still trying to figure out how to live in a world where I'm not questioned, belittled and punished for doing the right things. It seems like fear still dominates my mind, and sometimes it's hard to even recognize what the right thing to do is, I was so conditioned to make (often terrible) decisions based on the fear of the consequences rather than whether what I needed to do was actually the right decision. I still struggle a lot but it seems to be getting easier as time passes. I hope I can truly heal from the trauma I allowed that person to put me through, and I know I need to stop blaming myself for what happened and recognize I was a victim. I keep thinking I allowed myself to be victimized but that's not really true, it was so slow and insidious that I could not see what was happening until it was full-blown abuse. By then I was afraid to ask for help because that would mean admitting I had allowed this to happen. I'm blessed to have a loving, caring partner now, who tells me every day that he trusts me and believes in me and my abilities to make good decisions. Slowly that loving voice is silencing the old scary echoes in my mind. Now I just need to keep doing the next right thing and stop punishing myself for my past failure to recognize the abuse until I was so isolated that I had no one left to turn to for help. This is probably TLDR but thank you Danish for your channel, your videos have helped me in my healing journey 🙂
@videosmith1000
@videosmith1000 9 ай бұрын
Spot on. And regarding health care: my narc father-n-law was on his death bed with tubes in every orifice and whispered to me: “I’m not dying”. He was ornery, manipulative, and insulting until he literally could not move anymore.
@jenniferarnold-delgado3489
@jenniferarnold-delgado3489 11 ай бұрын
Another note , Sam Vaknin says that people with Narcissitic personality disorder ARE AI , they are programmed bot like entitites , with no soul . The soul part is debatable , but in the end of your talk , you are describing AI Chat Bot IT to a T - I feel that you who are really studying this personality disorder need to really take your work even more seeriously than just helping the relational victims of these people , and really understand the dynamic that is arriving inside of their thinking and behavior . Keep up the excellent work .
@allieeverett9017
@allieeverett9017 11 ай бұрын
It's so weird to read your comment...I must deal with narcs on a regular basis and have often thought of them as the lizard people...they seem robotic and without souls. Sometimes it's scary. Sometimes it's just what IS.
@sandysan177
@sandysan177 11 ай бұрын
At least AI dsnt harm PPL.
@allieeverett9017
@allieeverett9017 11 ай бұрын
@@sandysan177 not yet
@blurrylights6344
@blurrylights6344 11 ай бұрын
"not for the family they pretend to be a part of" No truer words. Years before I knew anything about narcissism, I filed for divorce after 20 years of marriage. Talking with my attorney I said that he wants all the benefits of marriage and none of the responsibilities. He never participates in the life of our family. His clothes are in the closet, his mail gets delivered here and he sleeps here but that's it. Thank you for another great video.
@HopeinJesus1987
@HopeinJesus1987 11 ай бұрын
I have just left this living nightmare... this exact situation. I think my heart and soul could not take the abuse any more. I hope you are taking care and sending blessings to you 🙏
@blurrylights6344
@blurrylights6344 11 ай бұрын
@HopeinJesus1987 That's so kind. Thank you. I very occasionally have a flashback, but I just let them float right back out. I've been happily solo for over 10 years. Same to you.
@Majsztrik
@Majsztrik 10 ай бұрын
Wow, this is just like my husband. I’m still with him for the kids. I’ve been asking him for marriage counseling and only after he had a nervous breakdown this year did we start going. He is getting better at not getting his anger out. I’m also getting better at regaining my confidence and independence.
@laurelvance5533
@laurelvance5533 11 ай бұрын
You have accurately described the narc in my life. Exactly...every word.
@danilaroche1156
@danilaroche1156 11 ай бұрын
Leave. He'll destroy you
@Kozie211
@Kozie211 11 ай бұрын
As an older survivor around narcissism, I keep asking myself; why, what did I come here to do, who or what brought me here???? At my age, I finally learned that you can never change them, heal them, improve them.... Still, unfortunately I am left with the initial questions, for whom? what? why? how long...?....🤷‍♀
@MostWant3d007
@MostWant3d007 10 ай бұрын
I like when you said they are the “master of none”. In their minds they are the one who should be looked up to….or praised. But have done nothing in their miserable lives for others to praise them in the way they want or “need”.
@FulvioGa
@FulvioGa 11 ай бұрын
Your teaching is invaluable.
@michellegeisler7455
@michellegeisler7455 11 ай бұрын
Thank you so much you have just described my brother and mother. They are both all 5 . I kniw I've had to deal with it my whole life. I found a cure I don't have them in my life anymore. To much heart ach from them . Thank you again I now know I'm not the crazy one 😊
@maryloudascoli
@maryloudascoli 11 ай бұрын
I listen to Dinesh and Fr. Ripperger in order to understand narcissism and evil.
@77sunflowers
@77sunflowers 11 ай бұрын
You are so awesome!!! Thank you for your videos, they are really helping me. 😊
@Ana_Sor4ever
@Ana_Sor4ever 11 ай бұрын
Even one year after my divorce from my ex covert narcissist husband, I am still amazed by his developments and the way he operates . His actions speak for themselves.
@tonyale749
@tonyale749 11 ай бұрын
How is it? I’m curious, i think my ex is a covert narcissist…. Still learning
@Ana_Sor4ever
@Ana_Sor4ever 11 ай бұрын
@@tonyale749 He knows what is upsetting me and the children and he is doing that every time he has the chance , he is superior with me whenever we talk because he truly does not care about breaking up and he sees me suffering and getting emotional every time we try to speak . He asks for half of everything we have , although I am with the kids and I payed for everything in our 16 year’s marriage. He is truly enjoying his new life . Everyone around him thinks he is the victim because he blamed me for the divorce , although it was an abusive marriage and I was the only one suffering so much that I even got a cervix cancer , but now I am ok , thanks to God !
@Indy__isnt_it
@Indy__isnt_it 11 ай бұрын
A long term best friend is elusive to a narcissist
@gigiarmany4332
@gigiarmany4332 11 ай бұрын
so true
@direstraights
@direstraights 11 ай бұрын
Yes, because there is no truth in their reality.
@jakobbergen7574
@jakobbergen7574 10 ай бұрын
True. My wife can be so charming many people think she is their best friend but she misses nobody when they are away.
@joannanoel4757
@joannanoel4757 10 ай бұрын
@@jakobbergen7574 My adult narcist child told me calmly and coolly that she would not miss me when I was dead....no malice, just stating a fact!
@thewhitewizard1320
@thewhitewizard1320 9 ай бұрын
May well be a psychopath (too) .....@@joannanoel4757
@Jem-Holograms
@Jem-Holograms 11 ай бұрын
What if a narcissist wants to change how can they genuinely change. It hurts when a narcissist becomes a narcissist because of the severe childhood trauma they had gone through. They are aware of themselves being narcissists, but it's like when they want to stop and be more emphatic their past inner rage takes over and they get so engrossed in their pain that they forget that they are behaving this way. Is there any hope for them instead of labeling them subhuman or without a heart. Any form of therapy that can help a narcissist become more empathic.
@sharonsmith2480
@sharonsmith2480 11 ай бұрын
Repent of your sins. Call on the name of Jesus. He will break the power of sin and give you a heart of flesh. Read His Word. Pray that His Word would be alive in you. He will change you. We must die daily to ourselves, our wants and desires and live for His Glory. We must submit our will to the will of our Heavenly Father. The Holy Spirit who is the spirit of Truth will lead guide and direct you. We are a work in progress. He who began a good work in you will complete it. His Word will not return void but will accomplish His purpose in you. You are here for a reason: to Glorify God and to enjoy Him forever. All who call upon the Lord will be saved. Call upon Him now before the great day of His wrath comes when He will judge the world in righteousness. He created you for a purpose : that you might know Him. To know Him is to have Life Eternal.
@tinyvr7036
@tinyvr7036 10 ай бұрын
Some only change for awhile and only when they are caught. They will find others to try to dismantle or abuse anyway. Do not allow them to target you. It causes unnecessary pain. Worry about yourself. If you are a professional, refer them out. Danish gave a talk on this about disengaging from them emotionally ( and spiritually). 🙏
@JenniferWrightme2jt
@JenniferWrightme2jt 9 ай бұрын
If they truly surrender to God they can change but they have to be willing to change!
@suzannemckitterick2781
@suzannemckitterick2781 11 ай бұрын
Brilliant. Yes, reality is what you have stated. There is nothing there when a narcissist is listening. No remarks, no thoughts, no gratitude. Yes..
@cdeweijer12
@cdeweijer12 11 ай бұрын
Spot on! I made it my education to deal with this situation. It doesn’t buy me a degree but reading all these comments learns me I must have many fellow experts. The narcissist I am writing about is also a sociopath, very partial to a certain kind of people that can make him feel important. Everyone not meeting his needs are critisicized including the children and myself. Best wishes to all of you 🕊
@skbarnes2012
@skbarnes2012 11 ай бұрын
That’s basically my narcissistic uncle. My grandma was his source of supply and she passed in June. He’s been trying to find another source of income and my mom and aunts aren’t giving in. He actually texted my aunt and he said he wants us to get cancer and he be the only one able to donate so he could tell the doctors to let us die. It’s been a nightmare to deal with him and we just want him to leave us alone but we know he’ll come back when he runs out of money.
@Rosalie-ct8mi
@Rosalie-ct8mi 11 ай бұрын
Oohh my goshh that he wishes your aunt to have cancer, wauwww he is not even hiding that he is an evil person.....Stay tough and do not let him ruin your life! Otherwise take another phone number if necessary, these people will never stop doing harm to people. I wished sometimes we could stick these people behind wallpaper , they are a nightmare! Take good care of yourself and please have strong boundaries with him 🙏
@taopaille-paille4992
@taopaille-paille4992 11 ай бұрын
Tell him he is a p o s
@tjkasgl
@tjkasgl 10 ай бұрын
I have found ignoring them only pushes them into increasing their attacks, while responding feeds them. So when a friend turned on me with the attack I fully expected I wanted to reply with a full attack, instead I gave it some thought and came to the conclusion the simplest reply would be the most impactful. Everything in her long text was designed to enrage me, to cut me to the center of my heart, I sent her back a text with nothing more than a thumbs up emoji. Instead of me becoming furious, she did. It made her so mad she hasn't spoken or looked at me for a year. It's great! Tell your family to only reply to your uncle's attacks with thumbs up emojis. If he continues, help them all to block his number
@Dsrgroup555
@Dsrgroup555 11 ай бұрын
Is female narcissistic use silence as a weapon.?? Not taking for days Or blaming for everything
@zandatee
@zandatee 11 ай бұрын
Danish, thank you👍❤ For the passion. Its healing and make you stand out.
@carolosborne2899
@carolosborne2899 11 ай бұрын
As a prior victim of a narcissist i can tell you is the most amazing accurate description of the operation of narcissists. Thank you!!
@thenativeconservationist
@thenativeconservationist 11 ай бұрын
My narc husband stole my biscuits that a friend got and said the dog ate them. Apparently my dog ate the boxes too 😂
@nycstarport8542
@nycstarport8542 11 ай бұрын
They DO NOT Listen; 90 minutes on the phone with my narcissist sister, all l got to say was 'yeah'.
@tahaseenmajeed7089
@tahaseenmajeed7089 11 ай бұрын
Awareness is always good .. i know what it is because you are informed about this term and know exactly they are upto.
@SuperWinnerJovienne
@SuperWinnerJovienne 11 ай бұрын
Thank you so much. I was not aware that one of the longest relationship partner was actually a narcissist. Everything you said above is simply true. Parter also says "i love you" everyday, promising "will never leave you, will be with you forever". When partner realize you don't like him/her anymore and was going to leave, they would break up with you first. They do not hesitate to break every promise. Also, whatever they promised, they never complete. They did nothing to fulfill their promise. They only say it. They dispect you, and twisiting facts to make you believe they care about you, but that's fake. They do not truly listen at all. They also never truly tell you anything about their real self. They are so disconnected from their feelings, whenever you ask them how they feel, they said "i don't know." No real communication ever happened at all. They did reply you, but when you look at their answer closely, they never truly tell you anything. They would also twist facts saying that not telling you or hiding something from you do not mean lying, which is BS. They constanly need to see friends. They said they can be alone, but they can't. They are irresponsible, unable to take responsibility. They act good in front of their friends, if you say this is a narcissist, every friend will defend for him/her, not trusting your words. This is simply frustrating!
@SoundsBogus
@SoundsBogus 11 ай бұрын
Frustrating? There's an understatement. I'm experiencing exasperation and a descent into madness.
@stephanie6851
@stephanie6851 11 ай бұрын
your channel has been so therapeutic to me, so glad i stumbled across your vids.
@chandnasingh4207
@chandnasingh4207 11 ай бұрын
Danish ,your vlogs have been so comforting.So many things that I couldn't find answers to ,are all explained by you.God bless you.
@cruzan8183
@cruzan8183 10 ай бұрын
Dementia has made my mother much kinder. She now refers to me as darling. Many years have been lost but I have had closure with my mother.
@mvbigmagic4048
@mvbigmagic4048 10 ай бұрын
You are lucky! I wish dementia had made mine kinder. In the past two years, she's grown increasingly paranoid, vengeful, and she doesn't even hide her lack of empathy anymore.
@cruzan8183
@cruzan8183 10 ай бұрын
@@mvbigmagic4048 my mother can still be impossible to deal but the onset of dementia and her increased frailty has been a godsend. I had to seek guardianship to protect her assets from the buzzards who were circling. I am extremely fortunate. The flying monkeys were taking my mom’s money and were working towards obtaining financial control of her assets. My mom’s money is now being directed towards her care.
@tunkytunky
@tunkytunky 10 ай бұрын
I have an interesting story relating to the lack of independence tier. One time the narc I have to deal with (who is a mild case but still squarely on the pathological side) decided to participate in a 2-week medical study for extra money. In this trial they were predictably treated like a specimen, even given a number instead of a name. Treated just like everyone else and kept in a solitary environment. They were allowed to make video calls, and let me tell you, I've never seen someone fade so fast. The other people in the study were just chilling on their phones but my narc was really struggling, not just mentally but PHYSICALLY to the point that the medical facility paradoxically had to keep him in a few days longer which i do not think helped. The good news is, that ever since that particular incident, this person's behavior definitely improved. He still acts up and sadly i do know that the last one you said - that they wouldn't care if you were dying in front of them - is still probably true. Even if they fix their behavior, the low empathy which is their defining feature will always be there
@CYCO1631
@CYCO1631 11 ай бұрын
My boss is this way... and is bipolar. I guess I'm mature enough to understand and see the narcissistic tendencies and understand there's little to nothing I can do but deal with it, and ive learned to. But as a compassionate, sensitive and Christian INFP, being forced to work for a narcissist, and knowingvhe's in chargevof 90 guys is really disheartening.
@josephinepee811
@josephinepee811 11 ай бұрын
I recognize that narcissim so well, I lived through it my younger years and it is still carried on by an off-spring. Seems like I even see it in newborn babies, like a spawn of the devil kind of thing and as they grew older, it cometh, the antics of a person being owned by the darkness emerges, seems like as soon as they can really form a sentence, they start using narcissistic attitude and live right through it and just cause trouble along the way and more to those that have trespassed against them, even if that new target they found, may not have done it on purpose to trigger that dark side, which seems to be lurking in every corner, it comes full force and last a lifetime, with no forgiveness, no second chance. Always saying, "Kill me!" "Kill me if you hate me that much!" just to win the conversation they so sorely need and it's their way of manipulating their victims. No one else shows more "self-contempt," self-pity, self-love more than a narcissist. I hope I am wrong to say that it can start from infancy, the darkness, the hate, the very purpose of being alive, born to be an "Earthling" if you wiil, not some Soul that is just passing through the Earth, like someone who really belongs to the Earthly Ways and do the job of making other people miserable as they are themselves. A dark sort. Thrives on hate as I see it. No matter how much we pray for them to look the other way, they seem to take it the wrong way everytime and all the more they rebel against the disciplines they get. Evil is out there, people who are the advocates of the devil are very clever, some not so much, that they are only fooling themselves, not the ones they are trying to decieve, sometimes they start using "The Fool's Gold" to look superior, high and mighty against their victims. May God have mercy on their Souls and may they be forgiven, for they know not what they do. Instead of hating them, I feel sorry for them. The chaos they created are something they will have to answer to, someday. No matter what a narcissist is doing you over for, keep your cool and let Karma take over.
@nemesister5109
@nemesister5109 11 ай бұрын
Not karma, let Jesus take over, vengeance belongs to God.
@karenc7476
@karenc7476 11 ай бұрын
We tend to think of narcissism in terms of a psychological response to trauma, but I am beginning to think of it as a generational curse passed on epigenetically. That or a familiar spirit that entered through trauma. Makes me think of Psalm 58:3 The wicked are estranged from the womb: they go astray as soon as they be born, speaking lies.
@mvbigmagic4048
@mvbigmagic4048 10 ай бұрын
I believe these people start early being evil also. My mother brags about when she was little, she would take money from the people who were trying to give her sister money for singing. So she's been doing this since she was small. And bragging about it, even into her 70's.
@styracosaurusqvt4841
@styracosaurusqvt4841 9 ай бұрын
I think narcissism arises for two reasons, (1) a natural tendency passed on genetically, or (2) a deformation of the personality of a child subjected to abuse and neglect, a deformation that becomes more probable the more severe the abuse and neglect the child receives. It can also arise from a combination of those two factors. A spiritual dimension, I believe, is involved as well. I think mild narcissists retain a capacity for empathy, but only for those receiving treatment that they acknowledge would also cause them pain or suffering of some kind. If a type of treatment they receive doesn’t hurt them, then from their point of view others should submit to such treatment when they deliver it, even when the person objects and tells the mild narcissist that their treatment hurts them. There is an expectation that they reserve the right to decide what constitutes mistreatment, not the person they are abusing, especially when they deem themselves the rightful ruler of the domain they’re in, such as the home. Some narcissists also believe that if they had to suffer a certain kind of abuse or neglect as a child, they’re entitled to subject others to such treatment when they assume the position of power upon adulthood.
@SheldonBrown567
@SheldonBrown567 10 ай бұрын
Biggest sadness I have ever known, is the narcissist mother and family members have killed my children’s heart. They have no love for me or anyone ❤😢
@adrismit6084
@adrismit6084 11 ай бұрын
Sad that they are so shallow. Great insight
@sonjamila
@sonjamila 11 ай бұрын
Yes, in every video you are a million percent right. Jut this one left me stunned, astonished.... I have only one question for you. HOW IS POSSIBLE THAT SUCH A CREATURE IS MY MOTHER OR YOUR MOTHER??? I would be extremely grateful for your answer. 🙏
@Slice998
@Slice998 11 ай бұрын
Thank you for this channel. It’s been so refreshing watching your videos, it’s really helped me confirm all my suspicions about my mother. She is a textbook narcissist and ticks literally every box you’ve mentioned throughout your videos. So happy to have moved out and all but cut her out of my life. 😊
@b8akaratn
@b8akaratn 10 ай бұрын
Holy crap flaps... This was by far some of the most brutally accurate articulation in narc. assessments i have heard to date. Thank you for it, like beating liberation on my eardrums 😊
@relied7934
@relied7934 11 ай бұрын
I feel that I see my authentic mother when she is being mean. When I was in grade school I remember this sensation that there were two moms. It took me a long time to put that into words. Like parallel lines, nice caring mom was on top, damaged volatile mom was underneath, and would break through the top bit. That is what is so confusing and keeps people stuck. Sometimes you get the nice, other times the nasty. I feel that nasty mom is 'real' and nice mom is just sugar frosting.
@sandy-pf9bb
@sandy-pf9bb 11 ай бұрын
That is so true, one on top of the other. You love sugar-coated mother and you stay around waiting for her to come back, but she rarely does bc she really doesn't exist. What a great job you did expressing it. Thank you.
@gonzaga45377
@gonzaga45377 11 ай бұрын
You described my mother to T. Everyone loves her and she is so sweet to everyone but her husband and kids. As soon as someone would leave the house her demeanor changed and it was crappy mean mom again.
@relied7934
@relied7934 11 ай бұрын
When nice mom wasn't there, nobody else mattered. She told my big bother she was going to kill herself. He was about 6 years old. One night she came into my room in a terrible state and told me she and Dad were getting a divorce. I cried all night. Came down for breakfast the next morning. She said 'sorry what I said last night.' My older siblings wanted to know. She said, 'Oh, I said we were getting a divorce.' And my sibs actually laughed over their Wheaties, and said 'You believed her?' (Psyche!) We always made it like an inside joke. We could always make eachother laugh. We minimized it all together. We had unspoken safety rules, and super-spidey mom sensors. We told eachother it didn't matter much. We told eachother that other kids had moms that were REALLY mean, so we were lucky to just have this mild version, who was nice sometimes, too. But we are adults now, and parents. Protecting children isn't optional. Why didn't Mom protect us? We were little, scared and crying. I don't want to see my kids scared and crying. I definitely don't want to scare them myself and watch them cry! Was mom okay with that? Did she ever feel bad about it? Does she even remember? I didn't understand then. It is incomprehensible now.
@sandy-pf9bb
@sandy-pf9bb 11 ай бұрын
@@relied7934 My mother never protected me from my father. Like you say, it's incomprehensible.
@relied7934
@relied7934 11 ай бұрын
@@sandy-pf9bb 😞 I'm so sorry. Believe me when I say you deserved love, protection and care. ❤️
@zeealinab8038
@zeealinab8038 10 ай бұрын
Being knowledgable about narcissist disorder has helped me decide to not fight to keep the relationship. I never knew about the disorder and accidentally I came across some videos of narcissist disorder. All that you have said in the video is so on point. Its the road to the journey of self love and heal.
@mvbigmagic4048
@mvbigmagic4048 10 ай бұрын
Once you see the monster, it's hard to unsee it.
@muddymike
@muddymike 10 ай бұрын
There was no accident
@SabrinaDanielle-c7s
@SabrinaDanielle-c7s 11 ай бұрын
40 years with one. He’s also a psychopath with OCD and he admitted a few years ago that he hears voices in his head. He found a new feed and is moving on after he leaves me with nothing. He leaves a path of destruction.
@BeautyWithTiffy
@BeautyWithTiffy 11 ай бұрын
Brought back memories from things my mother did and made me remember once again that my stepfather married his mother. And why their relationship was so volatile and how people can get mixed in to this horrific life situations when they don’t have to if they just do the shadow work and their soul retrieval’s. It’s terrible.
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