6 Things That Made Me a Less Anxious Person

[@LanaBlakely]

Click headspace-web.app.link/e/LB to try Headspace for free using my code LANABLAKELY

[@kristina160497]

I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE KIDS OF MY OWN ❤

[@NatureDaydream]

Finally, the Headspace sponsor. Thank you so much. Animations and the user interface on this app are cute. I literally cry whenever someone mentions this app because it's so lovely.

[@xw6475]

Dear Lana, t hank you so much again for this wonderful video. I love your voice, its so soothing. Would you consider doing on how to love yourself please?

[@faisallatif27]

😡😡😡😡

[@MrRobot-jb5tI]

I can relate with reading fiction or watching movies and tv shows as diving into fictional worlds is like hitting the reset button for the mind. It’s a temporary escape from the chaos of reality. Sometimes, when I’m in a situation where my anxiety spikes, I think of a confident fictional character and imagine how they’d handle the situation. It helps me stay grounded and tackle challenges with a different perspective.

[@LanaBlakely]

I do this a lot too! :)

[@philipholding]

Short-term, distraction, and avoidance may appear helpful. Long-term, well, time will tell

[@theadmiral4625]

@@philipholding ........exactly - this is the kind of avoidance of reality and responsibility that women continue to perpetuate.......... negative stereotypes exist for a reason.............

[@AKASHROY-i9f]

❤❤❤❤❤❤​@@LanaBlakely

[@blum3141592]

@@BiteAndBreatheThe Kreutzer Sonata by Tolstoy

[@brittneygriffin5969]

I'm in my 30s, and I am glad that I did not have children. I don't think there is anything selfish about not being a mother. Having kids is a choice, and choosing not to have children doesn't make anyone less of a woman. I also have anxiety, so being able to focus on my own health and my career has really helped me manage it throughout the years. Just remember it's okay if your path is different from others.

[@cozyhobbies_]

I have no clue why it’s even considered selfish not to have kids??? I have a toddler and it’s been the hardest years of my life, so much strain on relationship, huge responsibility. Having to do sleep less nights and not having as much energy and time for passions and simple hobbies . Enjoy your life to the fullest ❤ you’re kind and considerate and self aware

[@kkkzzz-fg5wg]

The last sentence you commented is literally powerful and inspired, it’s ok to have different or even exceptional life ❤❤

[@A_To_The_O]

I think due to the climate of the times and the nihilistic moral decline of the modern world, not having children is actually wise. As it will get increasingly harder to raise them without the influence of externalities playing a vital role

[@lbks16]

It's just a sign that a woman can't control her mind over instincts when wanting to have children. This world is full of suffering and increasing costs of living that it really is a wise decision.

[@Noname-e3b7s]

6 things are 1. Meditation 2. Reading fiction 3. Activity where you're present 4. Curating digital environment 5. Beautying physical environment 6. Gratitude

[@rebelandboltman]

I'm 46, single, never married, and no kids. Very seldom, I ponder about what might have been. At the same time, I count my blessings as well. You have to be thankful for what you have.

[@cozyhobbies_]

You have a peace many of us crave ❤ I miss living alone and only being responsible for myself. My bf gets very moody and I hate that his mood affects me and my space

[@ZaWarudo69]

Beautiful English

[@Harsha-D311]

You're very lucky

[@optimistic_1115]

@@cozyhobbies_my fiancé’s has bad mood swings that also affect my emotions :( Trying to learn to be mentally strong where I don’t let his emotions affect me as much.

[@RawrLyss]

I’m 26 and I’ve found that my desire to have kids is almost nonexistent now than it was in my early 20s. I’m not sure if it’s just my circumstances that led me here, but it does worry me if I end up not having any kids that I might regret it. I’m mainly just not in the right mental state and environment to bring a child into this world.

[@hanavaughan6956]

Same

[@gpii1407]

Same. If I'm really honest with myself then it's clear that I do not want children. But my fear of regretting not getting children or being alone later is huge. Even if I know that having children doesn't mean I won't be alone

[@selfclarityacademy]

That mindset: " See my anxiety as an overprotective friend..." is so helpful because it actually makes people feel little bit safer then when we think anxiety is the enemy and we get into to fight mindset. Good point Lana ❤ I will highlight this idea in some of my next videos when I overview Anxiety topic if you agree 🥰

[@marinam9431]

Love this idea!

[@1921modelT]

Lana, I think the hardest thing for us sensitive types who suffer from anxiety is this constant feeling that we have missed out on something that could have made us happier or more fulfilled. Even if life is going well, we can’t help but dwell on what could have been or what might have been. Every choice we have ever made has led us onto the path we are on now. Meditation, nature and beauty. The healing power of all three cannot be overstated. 😊

[@letscoversongs5134]

This is so true!!!this is what I've been thinking always... the constant feeling of what I Should've done instead of this always bothers me alot

[@LanaBlakely]

You didn't have to call me out like that 😁

[@brendawawiranjue7100]

I usually feel this way myself, im so gald i came across this, i thought i was alone. @@letscoversongs5134

[@diananurtlessova9388]

Omg, this is what describes me so well. Is it because of sensitivity ?

[@Leftiescrewdriver30]

I learned that the most sensitive types are the most introspective about life in general and it's a shame society doesn't give you credit for it. I don't speak for most guys, but I'd prefer a woman who is very thoughtful and caring. That means more to me than the superficial 'outward status' that so many others keep fighting for.

[@melaniemurphyofficial]

I'm so glad I had my children. I have a three year old boy and a one year old girl and caring for them, watching them growing, learning, watching their personalities blossom...it's the most fulfilled I've ever been. Ever. And I've had a mind-blowing career for ten years as a content creator I've gotten to do such incredible things! Meeting celebrities, briefly living in LA and London and travelling all over the world, working with enormous brands, I got to be there before TikTok existed...when being a KZbinr was such a big deal...and it brought me just so many mad experiences. T.V. Presenting. Publishing three books (my biggest dream as a child). Though I've always found that I struggle a lot with always wanting to 'top' myself, be it views or video quality...and I had to let that go when I became a parent. Less awards...no time to make more short films...unable to go to most of the premieres etc I get invited to...I can't even write right now. But letting it go has been amazing. I'm so much more calm. And I know that my children will only be super young for a very short amount of time. This is such a moment in time. Slowing down is SO important. And with children...there's no chasing numbers, there's no trying to over-achieve, perfectionism is stupid...it's just a big messy shit show, it's SO hard, it's never ending, but the beauty is buried in all that...the beauty is being present. Kids force you to be present. Time slows down. You realise how much love matters. The way you talk about your dog - it's basically that feeling AAAAALLLLLL the time, THAT is the beauty, and obviously it's much more life changing than getting a pet haha. I just mean, the beautiful positives of having a pet...and how hard it is to explain those...having kids is like that. It's impossible to describe how it feels but the feeling is amazing. And yes it will impact your career so it will majorly depend on your priorities. Some people could not bear the thought of their career changing! But I think about it this way, I'm 34, I might live another 60 years, and work (for me, EVEN work that's also basically...hobbies!) - work would never fulfill me forever. Because the most fulfilled I ever feel isn't when I finish writing a book or when I finish a video edit etc...the most fulfilled I ever feel is laughing with people I love, and creating people that I love WITH someone I love and spending all my time with them...that to me is my vision for a perfect life xxx

[@libra-rk3yi]

How is it ever possible that everything Lana shares relates to me 100%? I feel extremely lucky and grateful to find her channel. She is my comfort place ❤

[@aquamo0n]

my 6 things are 1. focusing on the present, noticing the small things 2. taking a shower (the best part of my day when I can wash of the things that happened on that day) 3. watching my comfort youtubers 4. eating/drinking my comfort foods and drinks 5. reading 6. petting my pets

[@FatimaMuggenburg]

I had my child at 23 on 2022. The first months I thought I had made the biggest mistake ever and I had lost myself to serving someone else. Today, there are days in which being a parent is still really tough, specially if you’re a person that values their time alone and has a lot of interests. Every now and then I have a slight wish I’d have a childless more carefree life. On other days seeing my child grow is the most rewarding and loving experience. As he grows I get to share my world more with him. Being a parent is really tough, it questioned me in all the ways I hadn’t expected it and constantly does. There are a lot of compromises to make and personal decisions get much harder since there are more variables to consider and needs to handle. I love my child and if you would decide to have one too I guess you’d love your sooo much too but I wouldn’t want to influence your decision in one way or the oder. I actually didn’t want to have babies before but it happened for me so my now husband and I decided we wanted to go along this journey.

[@LanaBlakely]

I appreciate this transparency so much! You sound like a very loving mother. Thank you for sharing

[@francinez]

This is one of the most balanced comment I come across pertaining to whether we want children or not, and probably the most relatable to a lot of people. Too many fight from both sides of the extreme. It's either "having children is the best thing you can ever ask for", or, "being childfree is the most freeing" etc. There's a whole lot of the in-betweens that are not discussed more of.

[@dogood7337]

Becoming a mother at 23 years old is SO young! But, most probably, if it didn't happen, you wouldn't have become one.

[@FrancisV4]

I think being unsure about life is kind of a privilege. I mean, in today's world, there are so many people that couldn't be bothered to focus on the important things, with all the addictions and distractions going on. So, I'm happy that you've been focusing on your life and yourself for so long, and it's been such a great passion for you. The tips are pretty good. We can have varying views on how to counteract our own anxieties, though what you have here is solid.

[@teresalambert]

I am 24 and already have a 3 yr old and a 2 yr old. I’m so glad I had my girls, they bring so much love and light into my life. They have forced me to dig deeper into wounds I did not even know existed until I was a mother. In so many ways, I would not be as healed and aware as I am without them. On the contrary, there are many ways in which they hold me back. I cannot freely delve into healing practices, hobbies, solitary experiences, ect and have to schedule those things into very small pockets of time. I think I would be ahead in some ways, had I not had them. All in all, I don’t think anyone can tell you whether or not you’d regret having/not having kids. I believe that you can have a joyful and fulfilling life either way. There is no right or wrong choice for you, just two equally fruitful, but different versions of you/your life that could play out.

[@graham167]

Having kids is the most fulfilling thing I have ever done. (Son is 19, daughter is 16). No regrets, despite the sacrifices in my career advancement and my marriage eventually failing. Parenthood is definitely not a cure for anxiety though. It just shifts your priorities. Thanks for your insightful videos and may you find happiness with whatever path you choose.

[@LanaBlakely]

Thank you for sharing!! 😊

[@AKASHROY-i9f]

❤❤❤❤❤❤​@@LanaBlakely

[@veronicagl]

This year I turned 30, I thought that by then I would be a wife and a mother, but nothing like that happened, I decided that I didn't want to have children, I've been through a lot with men, but also with myself, I don't feel mentally capable of doing so. I think it also results from the enormous anxiety with which I have been struggling for many years... personally, I find meditation and exercise consuming, and I exercise a lot and this is where I find my outlet for my emotions.

[@marinam9431]

I can absolutely relate to your post. I’m turning 30 in June and I’m currently not seeing anyone and haven’t for awhile now. I don’t have kids and I go back and forth on whether I even want kids. I also use exercise as an outlet for my anxiety- it really helps.

[@randyv8232]

As a 47 year old actor in the Philippines that has a tendency to be more anxious than other people. I have dealt w Anxiety in many ways 1. Meditation. Different kinds but more often than not Ziva Meditation 2. Emotional Freedom or Tapping. 3. Sedona method or releasing. 4. Doing “The Work” of Byron Katie 5. Doing 15 minute walks in the afternoon. 6. Laughter. 7. Gratitude.

[@SamuelHill-qt4zx]

I used to be very anxious but it all changed when I changed my attitude from a "bury my head in the sand" mindset to "I encounter obstacles that I get the opportunity to potentially grow from". With this attitude, I then proved to myself that I can cope and overcome with lifes challenges and thats theres nothing to be scared of. Then my anxiety disappeared.

[@mylene_b]

I'm 28 and I don't have kids, I have a bf and both of us don't want kids. We both have mental health problems which for sure do influence our choice. As for me, I come from a dysfunctional family and I am determined to break the cycle of violence. I've never felt the need to have kids and never understood why anyone even had kids. I respect everyone's decisions and body autonomy, I just don't feel that kids are for me. I'm not even financially independent yet. I'm changing careers, so I'm still at university. I think we live in such a difficult and unstable economy, I barely see how I can afford life as it is. I know I'll have to have conversations about why we aren't having kids, but tbh I hope our entourage respects our decision.

[@vuxuanngocvytran3414]

I’m 20 years old and currently don’t want kids for many reasons that relate to my childhood trauma and my parent’s health as well as my health mentally and physically. I grow up with a mom who didn’t want kids in the first place and she has some kinds of mental issues; She asks me everyday what would I feel like if I have kids, it makes me question myself, my existence and parenting style a lot. Also I have my great partner and we just don’t wanna turn out to be like our parents after having kids so we opted not to have children.

[@Captain_Commenter]

I don't regret choosing to be childfree for a nanosecond, and I don't see it as me being selfish but being strong, strong enough to be my authentic self and not a slave to society's demands. Stay blessed and bright minded.

[@optimistic_1115]

Love this perspective; I feel the same way about not wanting to be a slave to society’s demands about having children but also in terms of career choice and expecting others to need to work a typical 9-5 and retire at 65! Indeed you have to be mentally strong to not listen to society’s expectations.

[@amilovpink]

I'm turning 36 this year. No kid. Me and my husband wanted kid so badly, we'd tried very hard this past 3 years and ended up having 3 consecutive miscarriages.. to the point where my body said "that's enough." As I'm still grieving, every time I go on social medias and see some of my friends gave birth or got pregnant, I envy them and I get jealous.. But this anxiety and pressure and negative feelings are overshadowing every little happy moment I share with my husband.. After watching your videos, made me realize how much time and energy I'd wasted on thinking about something I can't change. Thank you for sharing your story and for positivity❤️

[@TaylorSwiftGleek]

Deleting all SM except KZbin has done wonders for my mental health x

[@lbks16]

It's not SM, it was your decision which toxic people you followed there. That's good you're doing better though.

[@adg8269]

I just love her voice!! Tbh I don’t always have the time to listen to what she says, but her voice is the perfect background music!

[@desertcrown]

Im turning 35 in autumn and im single. I always wanted to have a family, and thought by the end of 30 I would have family and kids. But the future doesn’t always go the way you plan and expect it to be. I compromise that I at least do something for my career and securing my future, if I’m not having family that I wished. I think it’s important to look back in life and say I have done what I was able to do. And having kids/family is too dependent on many outside factors.

[@lesliemodina5308]

I hope you will continue uploading videos for a long time. You have no idea how much comfort I got from you. I learned a lot from you. Thank you for making me feel heard and loved ♡

[@sabrosso1]

For sure one thing that makes me less anxious is to have a Lana video on Sundays to face next week with more motivation

[@browngirlshire]

i swear my social anxiety gets the best of me. like i cant even stay still without my fingers shaking and lips trembling outside in public. sometimes even when im infront of people im close too and i know. even if i didn't do anything embarrassing my lips tremble even when someone takes a photo of me. thankd for the tips.! i think meditation had always been helpful for me but i haven't been teally giving it time. hopefully i'll get back to it now that this video has motivated me thanks again❤

[@Rachelllllll2024]

Please try to do exposures every day ♥️ you deserve it.

[@88marig]

My anxiety is very similar to yours, I was terrified to have kids since I thought I had to overcome this in order to be a good parent, and I never seemed to be able to do it fully, but I became a mom last year at 34 and I have never felt happier and more at peace. My daughter gives me the strenght I never found myself and things are challenging but I will never regret having her.

[@user-vl4qt8el3q]

I relate to this a lot. I never realized how depressed and anxious I was before I had my daughter. My friends didn’t want children so I felt like it was wrong for me to want them. I was scared of not fitting in with them anymore. But now that I’m a mother, when I look at my life before her, I get so sad to think that I was okay and comfortable with the life I was living. I’m only 6 months in, but becoming a mother has already brought me so much peace and I feel happy for the first time in so long. Even since the beginning of pregnancy I feel like I’ve been looking at life differently. Her smile and laugh instantly make everything better.

[@AKASHROY-i9f]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@davidlin911]

I recently picked up buddhism about a few years ago and my social anxiety is greatly reduced now. It was a journey... I didn't start out saying I'm a buddhist, but once the practices were showing results I developed more confidence in the teachings. Maybe looking into the practices would be helpful!

[@dinaramuratova6298]

I'm in my early 20s, so people say that me not wanting kids is just immature. Growing (since 7yo) I have been surrounded by all my nieces and nephews (good over 20 - Im from a very big family), and i do love them, thanks to them I know how to act around children. I'm also a teacher, I enjoy watching all kinds of kids, their way of thinking, view on the world. All that being said, I do not want a child. Not because I'm tired of dealing with kids, but because I just realized that its not something I need in my life.

[@marcanthony8873]

You’re really pretty and very kind. I hope you can conquer your anxiety and give the gift of life to someone else. It is in an incredible journey. Everyone dies but not everyone lives.

[@rubyrubear]

The most fulfilling part about being a parent is the act of lovingly imparting my knowledge about life to my kid, every single day, and sharing his opinions about it, a two way dialogue we learn together and ask questions together ♥️♥️pregnancy was a beautiful experience of creating this human inside me, the moment I met him at birth is priceless. I have a feeling that you are going to be a wonderful mom if you chose to go on this journey ♥️♥️

[@tombeuker7306]

Thank you for posting this video and being an anxious person as well I can relate to you in a number of ways. I cutted out several things like social media and watching the news among other things. Recently I stopped using my phone as much as possible and started meditating + Journaling. Really helped me to get out of my head. Another thing I find is that since I'm in my 30's (I'm 31 now), I dont wory as much as I used to in my 20's. I feel like that part has come naturally. I think gaining more wisdom and aging has a decreasing effect on being anxious. Learning to accept the good and the bad parts of yourself also comes a long way to calming down your thoughts and worries.

[@dogood7337]

Hi Lana, I found this video particularly beautiful for the messages you are sharing. And how you would spend your last day made me cry a bit. Maybe the answer to anxiety and other feelings a lot of people are struggling with is to simply go back to the simple things, not stay so much in our mind and inside, but be outside in nature, smell, touch, feel the breeze & sun on our skin. Enjoy the present moment like our brothers & sisters from other species do. Regarding really special profound music, I recommend you listen to Madre Deus. I listen to it especially if I want to nap, it's really calming, it's food for the soul.

[@gavindaviesmusic]

I started suffering from GAD when I was a child and I'm now 59. When I was a child you couldn't talk about mental health in the way we can now. I didn’t ask for help until I was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer. My mother had passed away the year before and everything got too much. I'm OK now but I carry my Anxiety with me all of the time. As a father myself I can highly recommend it. It's the best and most wonderful thing a person can do. It's tough but extremely rewarding. Having someone to care for that relies on you to exist will change your life and help you to understand yourself. Keep up the good work, talk, share your personality, the world needs more people like you!

[@afreenzehra6233]

Lana you are so on time, i was struggling with anxiety this whole day idk why but you just came in the right time❤

[@ancac6046]

Same here! **sigh**

[@Mar-ME-s3h]

I think you truly have a very good chance of making it as an actress. You’re multitalented, beautiful, unique, articulate, intelligent and you have that “it” factor. In essence, people gravitate toward you (as your followers here). Find a good talent agency & although not really necessary right away, you usually start in commercials, take acting lessons. I know you would do very well in the United States. I always wondered why you didn’t pursue acting. Do not give up on a dream which you truly have a possibility of achieving ⭐️🦋

[@overcomingwarrior]

I have everything I need right now, that right there is called contentment. The world would be such a better place if people had this humble spirit of gratitude like yours Lana 🎉

[@EroiseMatthew]

NO NEED FOR APPS. YOU ARE MY MEDITATION. I LOVE YOU, ALWAYS!❤

[@Ramund]

There is no love like loving someone so much you create life out of it... And then the love you feel for your baby... The miracle of birth, there's truly nothing like it. It can be exhausting, but its the good kind, a completely fulfilling one. It's, by far, the best experience out there. I have such great expectations, but not for my kid, but for myself, to be a good dad, to teach him about the world, about what he might fond interesting, such as football (it was never my cup of tea, but with him, for him, it's just something else entirely). Hopes and drems to share the things I loved when I was his age, to nurture and raise a well-hearted human being. Again, there's nothing like it.

[@drsurbhibhanot7397]

Beautiful video. When I caught up in overthinking I relaxed myself by reminding that I am not permanent here. Secondly being a dog mom if u love Fred despite all difficulties , u will surely going to love ur kid as it is one of the most fulfilling desire of a women

[@deirdreedwards7267]

I feel truly blessed to have 3 beautiful sons. I have always worked but nothing compares to the love of children 💕 I respect motherhood is not for everyone.

[@DanielaRosenrot]

Never wanted kids, while other children my age back than wanted kids as their biggest dream and played with baby-dolls, I disliked baby-dolls. And now 30 years later it stayed the same. My mother was or is a functional alcoholic and was emotionally explosive and messed up my nervous system. Screaming crying babies cause stress in my body and I think I don't have the sense of responsibility to care for a baby. And thats ok. I want to focus on being good to me and respect my nervous system.

[@seetajn]

This video is everything. Ever since I've turned 28 this year, I have the same big questions for myself too. And I still do not have the answers and my anxiety has been really bad since then. Plus the part about wanting to read fiction instead of self-help books, and rotating between 2-3 books, were so real. Thank you as always, Lana. Edit: I am so happy to see you in your new apartment! Been watching you since I think you were at your family's house (?) or with your roommates (?), anyway, it feels like I've been a part of your journey as well. :,)

[@LanaBlakely]

Wow that's so cool that you've been here for so long. Thank you !!

[@wood1793]

I am preparing myself these days - mentally and physically- before going away for the military(it’s obligatory), And your videos are a great help and it’s so comforting to hear your voice. Thanks so much, Lana❤Just make sure to still be there when I am back 😂

[@LanaBlakely]

I'm curious, where do you live? Best of luck to you & I'm glad these videos are helping a little ! ::)

[@wood1793]

@@LanaBlakely Thanks a lot for your kind words♥️ I am Egyptian For context: The military service is mandatory especially for medical doctors and that’s how I got there.

[@Hikari_28]

@@wood1793بالتوفييق❤️❤️

[@acgillespie]

Thank you for being the beautifully kind person you are. I always enjoy listening to you

[@carlossalas2199]

Thanks a lot for sharing your experience. I haven’t found anybody describing so accurately how I felt and seeing how others go about it and can relate also helps me deal with it better. I used to think it was just a me problems but thanks a lot for sharing and show me that am (and nobody else) is alone in this journey. Greetings from Seattle.

[@Champingcom]

I really like your methods of coping with anxiety. One of the ways I get rid of anxiety is by watching and listening to you Lana. You are a beautiful soul. I am surprised that you didn't mention your physical workouts. Bless you!

[@ryans6442]

It’s always great to start a week with Lana. I really need to stop going on social media all the time to let my brain relax and not be on all the time. It’s hard but I think that plays a huge role in how I feel

[@salsal3235]

Watching you gives me a peace of mind, i like your calming and soothing way of talking and explaining things out 🖤

[@karmanshah11]

the more number of videos I watch from your channel, the more and more I am realising how much i relate to you, your way of video-making as well as your point of view of this world. I am a really calm person and I really love how you talk about calmness and peace and how you like to find beauty in small things and i also relate to how you told the impact music has on you (like same!)

[@Sp53653]

What a beautiful video!! Us anxious people are all the same, our ways to deal with the overwhelmingly chaotic aspects of the world are so much similar!!

[@ayushpawar1691]

It's way more calming to just listen to you looking into your eyes... and anxiety vanishes!!! Doing the things you mentioned really make a difference. I have been using Headspace for quite some time, it feels different when you meditate vs the day you don't. Thanks for sharing about curating own digital environment, I have to audit that.

[@Phoenixtwinflame363]

I've had anxiety since childhood and have learned to deal with it. I think it's one of MANY reasons I decided not to have children. My children are dogs. And, I treat them as children, not dogs. I'm now in my 50's and I can firmly say NO, I don't regret not having human children. My life is full...I am a homeowner, owner of 25 yr old successful business, divorced and happily single...until i decide to date again. Im not missing anything or feel the need to fill a void with children, like most. I am an over thinker, which comes with anxiety. But, also smart. And, as such I had a very long list as to why not to have children. Most people do not put a lot of thought into it, as to the pros and cons. My pros to not having them were about 60 plus solid reasons. My cons were two, and not good enough reasons to have them - 1) Afraid of getting old and not having anyone there at the end to take care of me. Everyone I know said not to have them for this reason, duh. I know there's no guarantee that your child will be there for you. But I know I'd be an excellent Mom & my child would not just love, but like me. 2) Not being able to show everyone in my family who has children how it's done. I have 3 spoiled, bratty nieces of my brothers and I think they are honestly at the top of my list as to why I didn't have kids. He and my Sister in law raised them horribly. My only regret is not showing them that you can actually have polite, well-mannered, kind daughters, or kids. I know, that sounds bad, but it's the truth.

[@samarakaye2573]

This video felt so grounding in many wonderful yet subtle ways. Thank you for this, Lana. I found myself doing or having the same things, too. Now, I realized, I actually had become a less anxious person than I used to. It was wonderful to see my growth through you.

[@natemarx4999]

Jonna Jinton and Lana Blakely have the two most beautiful KZbin channels of all time. Not a shocker that they are both in Sweden.

[@PigeonFace4Life]

I love Jonna Jinton too! They are such beautiful people with uplifting videos that calm me and see the beauty in life.

[@Divna22]

@girlsgonebible are awesome !!!! They give hope .. and love !!!

[@Daniela-gp4fk]

I love them both!! ♥️🌸

[@k.a0108]

Thanks for talking about anxiety

[@nathanyao3525]

Regarding having kids, I am 21 years old guy, very lucky to have grown up with loving parents with a successful marriage. My parents say having kids was the hardest thing they've done, but I know it is for a fact that my sister and I mean more than the world to them. They say that when they pass, they'll know we still carry on, and that brings them joy. Plus, I'm grateful to be alive. :) God bless.

[@lullatstars]

It‘s interesting to see so many men pushing you to have kids. Fatherhood is really different from motherhood though. I wish the men pestering you in the comments would spend their energy spamming men on dividing child rearing equally with their partners instead.

[@TheWanderer03]

What a beautiful and thoughtful video. This was really really helpful, past two years has been the most important and stressing years of my life and took a serious toll on my mental health. I have worked on myself a lot over the course, and learning still. There are few things that helped me a lot until I realised there are plenty of little things that prove phenomenal in nourishing the mental well-being. Top on the list are Gratitude and acceptance, I do feel much better and hopeful in troubling situations when I realise what I have and must be grateful for, and accept it is what it is. My heart takes a sigh of relief always. Then comes the physical environment, I visit art galleries, book launches, theatre and more events that give aesthetic soothing to mind, really helps me calm down. I've quit social media mostly and I've been getting good ideas and able to make better decisions in my life, it feels good living in real world rather than a reel one. Thank you so much Lana. You've come a long way, and still many things to learn and conquer. Life is a beautiful experience, at times it can be stressful but learning never stops. Bless you! 🌸

[@Gregory-t2g]

The same here, i look at things...an see the wrong first, then c how i can work it...but that's a hour or hours later. so starting over is very evident. when it's a lot. just know levels unknown is like space without the milky way..there will be ups and down, and learning is reachable.

[@denissangoquiza3805]

I love your videos. Your voice, the topics of your videos, your eloquence when you talk, the edition of your videos. It is everything is marvelous. You are so beautiful too.

[@Gustavsnaf]

You are the mostbeautiful woman I’ve ever seen, and your little dog, so beautiful vibe u are so precious-anyone would be lucky to share their life with you

[@Snowkone81]

Always wanted 3 kids, had one unplanned son with my now ex-wife, despite everything that has happened in life I've NEVER regretted having him. Literally the best part of my life. The fact you are actively debating it tells me you will be a good parent because you care enough to think about it. You'll find a way to be the best parent you can be. That's all the child can ask for.

[@maxukehito]

This video just made me less anxious. Thanks, Lana!

[@amandaw4945]

I tried medication once and it was when I was ready to quit my job I ended up having a bad experience and I did quit tried going back with anxiety medicine and I got in a bad situation with my boss ended up walking out and now I don’t trust people at any job and now I want to quit working all together. Edit: I love how authentic and real you are

[@kelsosworld]

Omg i always voted child free and was pretty nihilistic in a way but now that im in my 30s I suddenly question and feel like experiencing motherhood. Life is crazy but itll all work out which ever road you decide to take :)

[@msulagna]

Very beautifully put together. Loved the video. I always love to listen to you, you give a very serene, calm vibe. It calms me.

[@Divna22]

And you LOVE PEOPLE, GIRL !! WE NEED YOU OUT 😊🩷

[@AussieCat111]

I'm 36 and did not have kids. The door is not shut on it for me, I feel like if it becomes too late to have them the biological way, I can adopt and am considering that when I get to be 40, I might start thinking about it. But maybe not, too. I know right now though, I'm definitely not ready, in a lot of ways. Not all of us are ready for kids at the "expected" time.

[@WisdomClarity]

Relating to you touches my heart. Thanks girl 😊

[@Vaidehi2402]

Your videos are so calming ✨😌

[@LanaBlakely]

thank you

[@AKASHROY-i9f]

Lots of love from India❤😘❤😘❤😘❤😘​@@LanaBlakely

[@Awiesenable]

If you can identify the anxiety state, you have mountains of hope! What helped me was to manage anxiety by limiting my thoughts with a time horizon. So: when feeling anxiety, reduce the thoughts going past a chosen time horizon. If still anxious, reduce that time horizon. (brain exercise that helped my brain chemistry) My thoughts, goals, and actions had to be reduced to 1 minute. After positive confirmations, promoted myself to 5min horizons. I'm now to a week or a month. (helped a lot but getting a identification trigger of your anxiety was key to act on) Then a habit of being grateful of the blessings you have or had for the day that passed. Massive effect. Also, accepting the current state you find yourself in with the knowledge that it might change for the better but in small steps that you control. Do not bother spend thought time on things you do not control. (calming in a malty facetted manner) Good luck on your exploration! It is special, unique and has an undefined value. (was and is for me). Cheers

[@Sara-kg5sr]

Your hair looks great and healthy!!!

[@wideballfreehit]

Thank you. I haven't been feeling anxious but the thought of career/what's now/next has been in my head for a few months now. i guess it's time I gave meditation one more try :)

[@xcsheehan]

I’m 35, most of my friends have had kids except me. I’m focusing on my career. One of the biggest things is that people do grow apart over the kids decision. Different lifestyles and different problems. Maybe a factor in your decision could be who do you want to associate with.

[@debrafirestone861]

Don’t wait much longer to have a child if that’s what you want You hsve a biological clock

[@spirited_experiment]

Wow, Lana. I didn't realize how much you're affected by anxiety! You always seem so calm and confident the way you present ideas on video! Thanks for telling some of the ways that you successfully deal with anxiety. Does the act of goal-setting, planning, and taking the steps to find accomplishment, also "keep you grounded"? I also experience a lot of anxiety, and I know that when I achieve meaningful goals that I've set for myself (or even just starting to work towards them) it dramatically increases my well-being. So would you say you ever feel very good when you complete a difficult task, such as creating a video?

[@GlennSyndallius]

Hey Lana :) Long time subscriber, I check in on your vids from time to time. I saw this one and wanted to comment about what you said regarding living in beautiful spaces. You're 100% right - what you surround yourself with can have a HUGE impact on your health (both mental and physical), and your happiness (or lack of it). There's a word that came from your area - it's a Danish word actually. The word is "Hygge". You might have heard of it before (and other people reading this might know it too). Creating a hygge room or a hygge space is one of the best things you can do in your home. It's a space where you can go and feel completely comfortable. I'm looking at buying a house this year, and one of the areas I want to create is a hygge space. As well as my own music studio. ;) Keep up the great work, best wishes from Australia!

[@williescraftscorner1467]

Hello Lana! Also welcome to Sweden? Anyhow! Fellow 30 year old Swede here without kids. I had been pondering that question the longest time, too. And I feel like, for me, it largely depends on what me and my (future) partner would agree upon mutually. I have known people without kids, whom even up to their 70's where happy with their choice. I have known people who in their 40's decided to get kids, and despite some hassle, ended up very happy with their choice! In the end, however, whatever choice you make. I feel like you can always find family, not all "family" has to be related by blood. :) As for purpose in life and if social media is all there is for you. I feel like, that's up to you. You can create your own meaning and direction in life. I recently started a family business with the vision to spread (emotional) value to people. And its the best thing I have done! One thing that has me pondering, why not go and do interviews with people to share their life-lessons? Just everyday normal people like you and me :) Feels like that could be interesting!

[@valentinasuarez7252]

Youe videos are so liberating! Thank you 🫶☀️🥹

[@the_lone_wolf4281]

It is so weird how I feel the same on so many aspects as you, and I am also an INFJ. I have been meditating for quite some years now!

[@mtbjason4]

Having kids is hard. So much depends on the support systems you have around you, like if you have parents or siblings who can help you out. That being said having kids was most rewarding, joyful thing I've ever done in my life. When my first daughter was born, I realized there is this whole other dimension of love and affection available to us as humans that I didn't even know existed.

[@botortamas]

Listening to your voice and watching you talk is my weekly meditation 💋 dream girl

[@AGoldenBoon]

Beautiful on the outside of course but even more on the inside. Those simple things like going for a walk on a nice day with your dog and loved ones are really special moments. Thanks for sharing.

[@NFSMAN50]

Hello Lana, this is a great video!! Some good things for mental health is journaling. Writing your thoughts and feelings down in a book will improve your mental health lots!!! Reading fiction and watching shows is also good for mental health I agree Lana!!

[@petrdostal3915]

(One of) my method(s) is: just remember the situation in which you are just now (if it seems dark). What I have learnt is that a lot of things change through time (I do not write here: with an effort or without). If the thing becames (or just looks) slightly better, you will realize the difference, which can be helful at this stage. If it becomes worse, the advice is to actualize the method (start from the beginning). It won't solve any problem, but one thing it does. It will ensure that you will keep your awareness (you will play the role of the Observer - Atman...), and this is the beginning of every constructive changes (especially in case of INFJ).

[@cc9409]

10:25 I couldn't agree more. I really don't understand how people like most of the modern music, because it's sooo violent from many perspectives. I don't get how people can be so hateful, and honestly I feel sorry for those people which most likely "go with the flow"

[@kristy.tlm.]

Lana, thank you for this great video! I've found your channel just a couple of months ago and started following you. You greatly help me in my way to become more present and peaceful! send you my hugs and love from St. Petersburg!

[@aKm057]

Lana is my soul human. Hands. Down. I always make a point to go through her videos no matter what time or place. Because her sentences are what I have felt or am feeling. Her words give shape to my feelings and THAT, is an absolute banger. ^^ Dear friend, Thank you for starting your channel. Thank you for opening up. It must’ve been quite a task. Thank you for all your words and sentences and shots and music in your videos. Dear Lana, You are one of the best KZbinrs I have come across. Ain’t no butterin’ mama. ^^ I love you. We all do. Take care and, tight air hugs.

[@CS-rx7sf]

Having children is a personal question you need to answer. Children are very expensive, for starters. In my personal opinion you will never be emotionally “ready.” Being a parent is a selfless role. You have to learn to let go of control and perfection. Having children could break you down or make you a better person. It can twist and turn you in ways you never could imagine. Maybe you could talk this through with a therapist. Best wishes, whatever you decide.

[@DanielleBabyBliss]

I will be honest having kids is tough and a huge sacrifice but I can think of nothing that will be as fulfilling as having them in my life. Most people without kids I know have this anxious nature of feeling unfulfilled. I will say they stress less which is a pro but unfortunately women especially are very sensitive on the topic which indicates possible regret if they react in a triggered way. You can tell what someone really feels by their body language an energy than by their words and reasoning.

[@jboughtin7522]

Yeah animals are a constant reminder to be present. It's all about now for them. On the topic of music, a musician songwriter I like a lot is Jonathan Hulton. He comes to mind because I pretty sure he lives in Stockholm too.

[@Jerry_064]

I’m 27 and I honestly don’t know if I will have kids. Still getting my life together and healing from childhood and I’m scared that if I have kids I’ll mess them up. Maybe in 10 years or when I’m forty I’ll have enough wisdom and stability to be able to raise kids and give them the attention and love they need. For now I’m focusing on learning how to love and accept myself, learning to trust people, to allow myself to have relationships and to allow myself to open up in relationships, to be seen and to allow people to love me and to allow myself to love and acknowledge this need for love.

[@mastandstars]

I feel you on the of the beauty points. The music, the interiors and most especially on architecture. Especially on architecture (did I say that already?)

[@signevacation]

So nice to listen to you, I can only agree about focusing to more beautiful things in your life, and let yourself to choose what music to listen or what to see on social media! Really lovely ! Enjoy Stockholm !🥰

[@brians132]

Regarding the 2 questions you raised in your introduction I can offer 2 points to consider... Re: your career - if you've always dreamt of acting, why not join a local drama group? That way you can do what you love without any pressure about having to make a living as an actor - if you then choose to do that, you can always attend drama school in a few years if you want to. Entirely up to you, but acting is a tough career with a lot of competition so it's a risk to do it as your main job. Re: kids - my son brings joy into my life every day, but you need to find someone who wants a future with you as kids benefit most from a loving family environment with two parents. Raising a kid or two is rewarding but also very hard work and two people on the team means you can share the burden. Each year becomes easier though, and the love you have for them and that they give back to you is boundless. As a woman, there are time factors to consider. Over 35 it becomes more difficult each year to conceive so if you want it to happen I'd advise you to put a lot of energy into finding your life partner over the next couple of years so you have enough time to conceive without additional stress. Modern society has pushed the age of marriage/children further and further on and this is something that needs to be kept in mind. If you fail to take action over the next few years, you may end up in a position where you want kids but are unable to have them due to age, stress and fertility issues. Please don't end up as that person - you will have the rest of your life to regret it if you do... Good luck whatever your choices are... 💛

[@lullatstars]

A lot of fertility issues today are coming from the father hope that helps rounding up the image 😊

[@brians132]

​@@lullatstars Some do, but not the majority. The main problem with the man is the decline in sperm quality with age. But most men are quite capable of fathering children in their 40's and 50's and some, indeed, even older. Woman, in almost all cases cannot concieve naturally after 45 without medical assistance and even then it is difficult. And over 40 it is very difficult to concieve naturally and the risks to the mother of complications are far higher. As always - youth is on your side, until one day, it isn't...

[@LerenProgrammeren]

I think having children is the only way to experience unconditional love. I never wanted children but now that I have them they are the best experience of my life.

[@hummuslife1086]

You remind me so much of a girl who auditioned for the same drama college course I auditioned for in 2013. Love your videos 😊

[@alejandrorodriguez4189]

Loved this video and was well spoken, thank you for this hope your having a wonderful weekend 🙏