80s feminism can speak to 21st century eating disorders.

CRITICALLY CURIOUS Ep. 1: Feminist Theory x Contemporary Womens' Body Image & Eating Disorders
In this new series, I'll be breaking down a historically or socially significant critical theory and discussing its relevance to modern-day issues! For the first episode I'll be going through 3 of Susan Bordo's essays from 'Unbearable Weight' arguing the anorexic woman's BODY is a CULTURAL TEXT that literally symbolizes the societal 'double bind' (dual expectations) placed on them during the first-wave feminist era-a theory that still has impact on our view of womens' bodies today.
(also i realized how disproportionate the sections are LOL it's because i didn't want to spend too too long on the overall video and i felt the most relatable topics in line with contemporary issues regarding womens' body image & eating disorders.)
~
timeline:
~intro
~essay 1: Anorexia Nervosa: Psychopathology as the Crystallization of Culture 1:43
~essay 2: The Body and the Reproduction of Femininity 11:25
~essay 3: Reading the Slender Body 20:18
~contemporary stats 22:47
~conclusion 25:30
~
source material:
~'Unbearable Weight' by Susan Bordo www.ucpress.edu/book/97805202...
other resources mentioned:
~'The Obsession: Reflections on the Tyranny of Slenderness' by Kim Chernin www.scribd.com/book/163575438...
~'Discipline and Punish: The Birth of the Prison' by Michael Foucault monoskop.org/images/4/43/Fouc...
~'Confessions' by St. Augustine www.gutenberg.org/files/3296/...
all of these resources are available either for free or with a free trial!
contemporary stats:
~National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders (ANAD) anad.org/get-informed/about-e...
~YouGov Body Image Study 2021 today.yougov.com/topics/lifes...
~
music:
~fun time by dj quads
~
IG: @theurbanroyal
👆🏻 follow for more fashion/daily content!
~
tags:
susan bordo, critical theory, body image, beauty ideals, beauty standards, literary theory, criticism, feminist, feminism, feminist theory, literature, book, reading, body ideals, women, unbearable weight, eating disorders, anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, obesity, history, sociology, video essay, analysis, literary analysis, study guide, breakdown, 1980s, american history, skinny, diet, social media, unrealistic expectations, western beauty, media, celebrity, model, thin, flab, male gaze

[@lyingtomycore-1845]

Off-topic but you can’t walk into a math class expecting to be taught history. Men gotta stop complaining on videos about women because it didn’t talk about men. Like, duh, cmon

[@Solitaire427]

Women do the same things on Videos where they’re talking about only men

[@snailart9214]

@@Solitaire427 wah wah wah boohoo

[@jamm7464]

@@Solitaire427 not really, go to any video about men, women's comments are pretty much supportive, ur just trying to turn this into a victim competetion

[@pinkroses2522]

@@Solitaire427 “uh…. Ur mom!!!!!!” hey there’s a new Jordan Peterson vid! Psstt!! Shoo shoo!

[@Solitaire427]

@@jamm7464 No the original person that posted was doing that And I was pointing out that it’s a two-way street

[@aluacage1054]

It’s drives me crazy how we are expected to have our lives out together and starve ourselves while doing so. When I was a teen it was easy to do well in school eating an apple or a salad a day, but now that I’m in college, I have job, bills to take care of, exercise, and I’m older, there is absolutely NO WAY I can survive like that. If I don’t have any substantial caloric intake, I don’t perform. I do badly on my job, on my classes, my head hurts, I can’t focus. I can only stay in bed all day to function. For what? Yet it’s still expected for me to be thin. My friends barely eat, and I feel weird being next to them for that reason. But I can’t function otherwise ?!? Like I work in STEM asking any of my male peers to starve themselves would seem crazy, since they have a lot of work, yet them having bellies it’s fine, but if I have a belly I’m suddenly not attractive, messy, undesirable ?!? I hate society.

[@soeuninseoul]

Oh yeah the double standards are real…i gave up on any notion of watching my diet when i was working w kids lol that level of stress = total free for all. thinking about what i eat/look like and trying to do my best at my work would’ve killed me 💀

[@whatsonhermindblog123]

Yes society i hate her too

[@anname7373]

You can't do stem if your brain isn't getting proper nourishment. A caloric deficit just isn't possible in stem fields because our brains use up so much fuel trying to understand the task at hand.

[@CadetRedShirt]

"seeing the larger body as a lack of self control and self restraint" is so accurate for what i've seen in my life. i'm a big girl but i eat the MOST healthy and exercise regularly, best heart rates that doctors always look shocked... but i can gain weight so damn quickly from my genetic background and so many people look at my physical weight to try and make a comment on my lifestyle & personality just based on the weight.

[@0neAutumnLeaf]

Not sure if this helps, but even when you are skinny you don’t escape the unwanted comments about your body. I’ve had comments from “you are too skinny, you need to eat more” to “you have no boobs/butt, you’re basically a boy!” to “stop going to the gym, you’re become too muscular, and no guy will want you” It feels like women can never win, we are always too fat or too skinny, too soft or too muscular, etc. Society loves to criticize women for any little thing. However I totally acknowledge that people with larger bodies have in way tougher in a socially that values slimness. This is why I personally LOVE body neutrality, as it advocates for the focus on the person and not the physical body.

[@katbamf99]

Totally feel you, I’m super skinny but I honestly don’t eat the most healthy & I over eat and binge eat sometimes. I’ve met plenty of people larger then me who are definitely more healthy and eat way better than I do.

[@NickaLah]

Yeah, doctors always act shocked when my bloodwork and blood pressure is amazing. Yet, if I have any issues unrelated to weight, they try to make it about my weight... I had a plus size ENT tell me to lose weight for an unrelated throat issue, that she prescribed a $200 med for... meanwhile, one thing that mostly cleared it up was giving up sugar and going keto. This is obviously healthier, but I didn't have to lose any weight to resolve the issue.

[@suzan7867]

Same here. In our class there are only two big girls and I'm one of them. I'm also a dancer, got cash for dancing, was going to become a choreographer. When we started learning dances and rehearsing for prom of course people were not happy when I did better, and didn't listen when I tried pointing out their mistakes or showing the right way. However, they listened to slimmer girls in our class and put them on the front. I didn't even notice how connected it is to my appearance until I realized that the only girl who acknowledged me was the other big girl. And the way nobody beliefs me when I say I'm flexible but instantly belief a slim girl, please.

[@ashley_brown6106]

Weight gain is simply consuming more calories than you burn... There's NO WAY you're consuming less calories than your body needs and you're unable to lose weight. "Genetic backround" is only an excuse, sorry. Your genetics can definitely play a role in how much calories your body burns, but how many calories you feed it (even with healthy food!) is COMPLETELY up to you!

[@catcreme]

"You can say that you love and embrace all body types, so maybe you say in your head I don't want that body type. I don't want my woman to have that body type." perfectly nailed the entire body image problem in one sentence.

[@cherrytomato7711]

part of my ed definitely developed due to comments i got when i was an adolescent starting puberty that made me feel like having a woman's body is bad . at the age of 11 i could not grasp the concept of what was happening , but i did get the concept that i had to stay small and fragile according to my family's comments to stay desirable and sophisticated . hatred towards women is so deep rooted that it's hard to explain to my male peers. they never believe me when i tell them , yet i am not the only woman who's gone through this . my experiences are not a rarity , although i wish they were .

[@katgreer6113]

yeah, i fid it odd how men never understand why women feel pressure to be small, especially when they date and marry those same types of smallish girls...we have to feel like male validation is the end-all. i wonder when women as a group can shake it off and be free from that.

[@cherrytomato7711]

@@katgreer6113 when i tell them i definitely have trauma from my ed and society wanting me to be small they're like "it's not that deep" but also fatshame every woman over 130 pounds 😑 the hypocrisy

[@-redacted2554]

@@elinope4745 lmao

[@LoneWulf278]

Nah. They know what you’re talking about. They just don’t agree with changing it because it doesn’t really impact them (not as much as it impacts women/girls). Controlling how women feel about their bodies can be very powerful and profitable for a lot of people, male AND female. They’re not trying to give that up.

[@emmaphilo4049]

@@cherrytomato7711 'it's not that deep'... This is denial, or just refusing to use their brain and think in general

[@morriganarcheron364]

2 years ago when I was around 15 I had a normal and healthy body (my BMI was between 18.5 and 19) and I was very happy with my body, loved it and didn't care what anyone said about it. until my mom started becoming unhappy with her OWN weight but started calling ME "fat" and telling me I shouldn't gain any more pounds otherwise I wont get anywhere in life. At first I usually cried and dieted for a few weeks. but then after a while when her so called "advice" turned into insults and I became anorexic. I was doing bad in school because I wasn't eating well and not exercising either because I didn't have enough energy. I'm finishing high school now. and her abuse wasn't only emotional either. the number of times she told me that shes ashamed that " this piece of shit" is her child was too many too count. I'm still trying to ignore her and try to not give a shit but I'm crying as I'm writing this so please, if youre unhappy about your body, get help from a professional, don't take out your insecurities on someone else. PLEASE

[@katerinaklutz3239]

I'm so sorry your mom treated you so terribly. Remember, you don't owe her anything, and you can always take a break from your relationship if you don't want to cut her out of your life forever. Clearly she was the person who needed professional help and it's so disgusting that she lashed out with such horrible words towards you. I'm so sorry, and your anger is valid.

[@haleyjoy1377]

:(( you deserve to nourish your body. you deserve to be loved and celebrated in a healthy way. sending so much love for you.

[@anupreetiboro1352]

I would be more than happy to leave my home and start living alone. I've been extremely clumsy and oblivious to my surroundings resulting in getting angry at. There's a lot in my mind and I can't help it when I get distracted. I have to pull myself back again but it isn't working. I have been showing symptoms of depression for as long as I can remember. And as much as I appreciate my sister trying to help me, I don't believe that it is working. I've been traumatized and while I realize it and know what I have to do get over it, it is still so hard to work on it.

[@user-dq8km4zt7f]

I have the same situation but on a less intense level. My mom behave the same for years, until I realised what was happening, and told her that in face. I don't know if this helps, but just remember that her belittleling you is sign of her own weakness and insecurities, and that you're above that. The people who cannot stand other people's happiness and have to bring them down with themselves are extremely miserable and pitiful

[@riversnow5771]

I'm so sorry you have such a terrible excuse for a mother. Sending tons of love your way! Also, some advice from someone who wished they had learned sooner; "family" is who you decide to let in your life. Cutting out toxic people, no matter their relation to you, is your choice and is sometimes the best decision you can make.

[@oliviafagin293]

I personally feel like traditionally feminine traits like being lead by warm intuition, being flexible, empathetic, collaborative, receiving, and playful aren't nearly as praised in society as more traditionally masculine traits like being lead by cold logic, being focused, independent, competitive, providing, and assertive. While I think having a balance of the two is definitely healthiest for everyone, I know I have always been a more naturally feminine woman and I think a big part of anorexia, for me, was trying to reclaim a sense of being soft, delicate, fragile, gentle, and carefree after being in a very masculine mindset for a long time. Larger, more mature, womanly bodies have always been associated in my mind as being tired, let-go, overworked, stressed, and taken for granted which is exactly what I didn't want to become. While smaller, more youthful, childlike bodies have always been associated in my mind as being more vibrant, nurtured, respected, rested, appreciated, and taken care of. I am now at a healthy weight and I can clearly see that these associations are not usually true but are rather the media's attempts at making women stay in a perpetual cycle of attempting to shrink their bodies and take up less space.

[@kungfukenny1793]

True being empathetic, flexible, warm or whatever tf else gets u nowhere in life. If those things truly had power, men would have never given them to women

[@carold.9049]

Same, my experience is very similar to yours. It started for me as being compared to slender, sweet little girls from church and being treated worse by my mother for acting 'like a man' and being chubby. I wanted to feel protected but at the same time my body became so big, and I started to get catcalled at the street at 11, I hated to look as big as my mom and to be treated like an 'adult'

[@strawbun871]

capitalism baby

[@jessicacabanilla1524]

I have a naturally large figure and have never viewed myself or other large bodies as tired or stressed or undesirable? I would like to know how you came under this influence and how you overcame it?

[@blush3790]

@@jessicacabanilla1524 I’m guessing social beliefs. Lots of jokes out there about gfs/wives “letting go” once they’re in a committed relationship and comparing pics of them “before and after”. Always, she has barely changed except in ways that are entirely natural: stretch marks, body hair, a full figure and wears comfortable clothing. I’ve even seen women shame other women for “not trying to remain attractive after marriage”, again referring to gaining the traits mentioned above. r/arethestraightsok is full of examples of this phenomenon. Idk tho. I’m gay, and seeing women gain a bit of weight and stretch marks and all that sounds rly cute to me; like, they’re so heavily associated with long term romance and femininity that I don’t understand how men hate seeing these traits develop

[@brittanystorey9460]

I always had more issues with other WOMEN commenting on my weight than the men in my life; aunts, grandmothers, my mom, other peoples mothers, women at the mall. I was always too skinny or too fat- to muscular or too frail Dudes just judge if your ass and tits aren’t to their liking, or your not “tight enough looking” without being too muscular depending on the dude. So glad I’m attracted to women

[@dejstoney]

Smh. That’s so sad. I’m sorry. A bunch of projection.

[@Kay-kg6ny]

@@bleachdiet559 what are you doing.

[@heh4389]

@@loveandsqualor this is true. they’re just passing on the messages theyve internalized for years because they genuinely think it’s helpful and true. of course not an excuse, some of the women in my life have really harmed my body image with their projections. i just think women should be taught healthier outlooks about bodies and obviously healthier coping mechanisms so they don’t pass it onto their daughters/granddaughters/nieces/cousins etc

[@bleachdiet559]

@@Kay-kg6ny I am of course agreeing with out fem-cel queen Maria Serdiuk who thinks women have no free will or agency of their own ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[@TheVivaciousNerd]

@@bleachdiet559 That is an unhinged interpretation of what they said... If you're implying that socialisation is not relevant to how people treat their bodies and those around them then you aren't paying attention. We're allowed to criticise the ways in which we're reared, that doesn't mean we're being hateful towards other women. Also acknowledging the influence of social standards isn't the same as saying that person has no choice or accountability. It's called nuance.

[@lavinder11]

Interesting. The girls and young women I worked with diagnosed eating disorders had history of trauma. They felt that losing weight (and breasts) or gaining weight would make them unattractive to men, thereby avoid future assaults.

[@loverrlee]

This has been true for me. When I lost all my weight the first time, I felt too vulnerable and was constantly harassed by men I did not want attention from. When I gained weight again, I was left alone like I wanted, but I also felt less healthy. Basically I wish I could be a healthy woman in society without the constant barrage of unwanted attention from men.

[@user-umcub]

I live in a different culture so losing the weight helped me not get harassed so much

[@mimries9612]

ABSOLUTELYYY

[@mimries9612]

Too fat, comments. Too thin, jealousy and still somehow comments. Too muscular, not pretty. All the while dealing with school/work or both, kids, hobbies, social life, and other aesthetic areas. Everyone just needs to shut the fuck up honestly

[@happyjellycatsquid]

@@loverrlee My trick is to be mean 💀I “playfully” absolutely roast any man that speaks to me so they won’t want to hit on me because they find me sorta scary/insane. It comes with it’s own set of issues, but hey 😅

[@mimvsa3521]

When I was 16 and started to develop visual signs of my anorexia, my mom told me she's glad I've lost all The Weight, because she was afraid noone will be interested in me. I was 13-14 when she was thinking about that....

[@loverrlee]

I’m sorry she said that. You are so much more than “The Weight.” Someday you will find someone who loves and appreciates you inside and out.

[@neranerak]

so glad youtube recommended me this video. this was so interesting, I really enjoyed it. thank you!

[@soeuninseoul]

Thank you! That means so much 🥰

[@chandranelson2772]

Me, too!

[@jamielynn4187]

No kidding! I had no clue who she was until KZbin suggested her… but I’m so glad it did!!! 🥰

[@GrizzlyInc-zs5xu]

I am a trans guy who's in recovery from anorexia Nervosa. You're comment about wanting to achieve a masculine prepubescent body hit really hard for me. I do wonder weather many AFAB trans folks we're driven to eating disorders as a way to control the public image of their gender. Especially in a time where they do not have the words or safety to assert themselves.

[@miche8868]

++

[@rofljen666]

I started being afraid of getting bigger when I was probably 8. I lied about needing bigger shoes because I was terrified of having a bigger body. I guess I thought if I denied it, it wasn't true. While I would consider myself recovered for the most part, I still find myself wishing for a more boyish figure sometimes, especially wishing I didn't have breasts at all.

[@wavy6470]

Me too, I wonder if this has something to do with CPTSD and wanting to be smaller and less noticeable

[@zg5672]

as an anorexic girl i always wanted the 12 year old boy look bc... skinny 🤣 now in recovery

[@phucbich7581]

@@zg5672 as an anorexic afab person I always wanted a Japanese fashion magazine body (I’m half Japanese and was Raised by the culture) cause skinny.

[@zg5672]

@@phucbich7581 ahah too relatable, its like normal skinny aint good enough... but asian skinny??? 🥴🥴 (im asian but would always look at chinese streetwear models cause i was always jealous of ththeir tall and slender figure, while i was just short and stubby)

[@lo4568]

@@zg5672 Trigger warning, this will get very personal. I talk about my "jealousy" of anorexic people. I have never told this anyone, but if I'm being honest, I hate hate hate skinny women. The ones that are flat-chested etc. I don't really HATE them, I'm just extremely jealous of them. All of my life, I had to listen to my mother telling me that "if only you'd lose just a little bit of weight, you'd be so pretty". Telling me that my butt is too big. Forbidding me to wear certain dresses because my butt appears "too large" in them. I am at a normal BMI btw. But I have a very curvy figure, not because of the fat but because of my bone structure. I just have very wide hips and I developed them pretty early on in my life. I also wish I was flat-chested because all of the pretty girls on pinterest are flat-chested. They all wear so many cute tops that I simply can't wear because my boobs are in the way. I just feel like society likes the "prepubescent boy" look the most. Or the cute loli girls. That's what men are into. But I will never be that, never. I will never be a cute little anime girl with no womanly features that speaks in a high-pitched voice. I wish I was but it's never gonna happen. I'm not anorexic, I actually tend to overeat sometimes out of boredom. But sometimes I wish I was anorexic because it's one of those mental illnesses that are regarded as "cool". My mental illness isn't cool, it's not pretty and angelic, it's ugly and destructive. That's why I'm jealous of anorexic girls, because they have what I can't have. What I will never have. And that's why I hate them (and regular skinny women too).

[@orangepeelqueen2787]

I remember being .... so so young, maybe 5? and watching a show where these guys try to cross a huge desert. They said they were losing weight due to using more calories than they were consuming, and I (who was already underweight) wished some sort of hardship like that would happen to me so I wouldn't be able to eat either.

[@blondie9909]

One time i had food poisoning and spent a week in bed vomiting and not being able to eat anything and just barely being able to drink water and it was horrible but i lost 5 kg in that week alone and even after a month only gained 2kg of those 5 kg back . From then on i would hope to get it again so i could lose weight , i dont anymore , but its weird how we WANT something awful to happen just because we want it to force us to lose weight

[@profpiew]

@@blondie9909 I had the same thing happen to me

[@blueshell820]

I developed anorexia nervosa the second year grown men started treating me like I was the sexiest piece of meat they'd ever seen. I was twelve years old, and I've always looked young for my age. It didn't matter how I dressed, and I can say that this is 75-80% of what contributed to my anorexia.

[@Waspinmymind]

@@peamutbubber Wtf? This person just told you they started hurting themselves because men were treating them like a sex object.

[@denisearyana3860]

@@peamutbubber she's actually talking about how being sexually harassed by grown men is a reason why many adolescent girls become anorexic. The fact that Thin/attractive people usually get better treatment is true but a complete different subject.

[@em6644]

This was a really big factor for me too. I’m so sorry, I hope you’re safe and healing

[@elinope4745]

Did you become anorexic because you wanted to continue to attract the attention of men, or did you become anorexic because you thought looking younger would make you invisible again? The biological norm of the animal kingdom is for females to be most sexually attractive the year that they become fertile. Our social norms may condemn this, but it is still our animal natures to be this way.

[@blueshell820]

@@elinope4745 it's a shame it's illegal to tell people to shoot themselves.

[@kittea0203]

im so glad you spoke on the mindset of anorexia. most people believe it to develop through vanity and just a desire to have a skinny body, but it’s so much more than beauty standards. feeling out of control is for sure a large cause for development. examples which may make someone feel this way are mental/physical disability, mental/physical illness, financial struggles, strict parents, breakups, intense and overbearing emotions - all can create feelings of restriction in the direction, journey and success of your life plus less power/control over it. starving is the manifestation of these feelings. i also loved the part talking about bulimia and it’s desire to balance the consumption with exercise of self control. this will be such a helpful video for people mot struggling with anorexia and other eating disorders to watch, thank u sm

[@imcomingforyou.3245]

Exactly. Anorexia is sometimes the one thing women/ people can control. Eating or the lack of is sometimes all they have.

[@kittea0203]

@@imcomingforyou.3245 exactly !! it definitely feels that way for me

[@annalisehuntington]

this is amazing. i appreciate the thoughtful way you present the anorexic mindset. as an anorexic myself, i constantly felt like i was constradicting myself, because i had an eating disorder, but i am also a raging feminist, and i want to destroy the weight loss industry and diet culture. im slaying now though because ive gained all of the weight back and my hair isn't falling out as much!

[@soeuninseoul]

Thank you so much! I definitely can’t take all the credit-Bordo spoke for so many of the struggles I couldn’t voice! Reading and analyzing her text for myself was definitely super helpful for me, and it’s still a process I’m working through as I was never officially diagnosed. Hope to keep giving a voice and thought to these issues. And yes keep on raging LOL. And congratulations, such a huge step!!

[@chana7276]

Yesss girl I'm so proud of you!

[@danilovesjelsa1352]

i'm recovering too!!!! im cheering you on from afar!

[@mmarleenn2391]

That's great to hear that you're doing better🥰

[@mesCheerios]

ah someone i can relate to so much! i have not been able to meet someone like you before. Except rather than consistently having anorexia i have been up and down with my weight throughout life because of this contradiction of values. No matter whether i have been fat or thin i always had a reason for self hatred

[@thedabara94]

I'm from Venezuela, and I'm not sure how much influence culture has on my experience, but from what I hear of my other latino friends the weird moral panic over weight gain is a common occurrence. My disordered eating(which eventually blossomed into anorexia by the time I entered my freshman year in HS) began when I gained weight after catching mono during the summer of 1990. This was a time when part of the treatment was bed-rest(I know that's not the case anymore) An uncomfortable moral panic swept through my family, my chubbiness was like a dark ominous cloud that would cause everyone to start "judging" us. Until one day my grandfather sat 10 year old me down, to have a serious chat with me. In this chat he proceeded to let me know that(paraphrasing) "nobody likes a fat girl, especially men, so get your sh*t together and work hard to lose that weight" That's not to mention the cornucopia of harassment I got from my peers in school when I got back from vacation, and they saw that I'd gained weight. The message that I internalized was: "You're only worthy of love and kindness if you're skinny" And I took that to heart. I'm 43 and I still struggle with dismantling that message for myself, I still struggle with that voice that gets too excited when I notice that a clothing item fits a little looser. At my thinnest, I had plenty of grown women stop me while I was out and about to ask what my secret was for staying so thin. I never told them the truth, just your usual "I exercise and eat well!" horsepucky. What I have learned is that most people(men especially) get suuuper uncomfortable when you let them know *exactly* what it is that you go through to stay conventionally thin. My ex-husband was terrified for me when he saw just how messed up my eating habits where. He always assumed I was naturally thin. Thank you so much for this presentation, "Unbearable Weight" confirms a lot of observations I've made throughout my life.

[@emmabennett7699]

I'm 18 years old, so take my theory with a grain of immense salt: But I feel like the reason men get so uncomfortable with knowing what goes on behind the curtain with women, especially with EDs, is because it is like a direct confrontation of hiw fucked up their ideologies and standards are. Men want to believe that it is just their animalistic instincts to like really skinny, adolescent girls, so to see the actual consequences of what their ideology does makes them have to question themselves and they don't like that. Not to mention the other factor of men often having an extreme unrealistic hypersexualized ideal of women in their head, (often coming from porn TV/Movies and societal values) that they genuinely belive that the way women are in these pieces of media is how they vehave in their daily lives. I've seen a KZbin comment if a woman saying that her ex was shocked that she wore normal bras in her daily life and not lingerie every day because that is what she wore in the bedroom. And to reveal what it actually takes to maintain the "perfect" body is another shattering of that fantasy that women are just naturally beautiful without trying.

[@ludofratta2328]

Can we also talk about how fat has now become an insult because many things that fat and ugly are sinonims? Like if I say someone is fat instead of big if you think I'm insulting someone, that is you who find a negative connotation to my words. Ugly and fat are not the same. Someone fat can and is beautiful to some people because beauty and ugliness are subjective, just like you can find a skinny person ugly if it doesn't meet your taste. Fat is an innocent adjective that has become negative due to normal weight or skinny people, considering it an insult. Also, I understand the messed-up standard of very skinny people being now the norm, but how come normal weight people are now considered chubby or curvy? Like no, they are normal weight, and if they were chubby, why is that a problem? I swear now everything has to be in a way problematic

[@soeuninseoul]

Agreed! I never knew the full history behind the word but I definitely think we’ve placed our own connotations on both ‘fat’ and ‘skinny’ as if one is better or worse than the other. We need to reassess and neutralize words that have been weighted by social and cultural factors!

[@starzies]

@Zenith i think it depends where you go in europe. i dont know about all countries, but the Uk has high rates of obesity as well.

[@noodles8951]

Where are you living. Curvy is the norm now, not skinny. Big butts and boobds and small waist ia the trend.

[@anajulianascimento7832]

@Zenith funny, because here in Brazil the "curvy" people of USA would be considered skinny, since most of then are just skinny people with large hips and maybe some booty and boobs! I honestly feel really sad that those woman are told that's something "wrong" with then.

[@SeiichirouUta]

@@noodles8951 I guess trends are "too weak" to break that type of thinking. Or why do I still see young women in the shop I work at, who get frustrated or even teary-eyed, when they don't fit EU size 36 trousers?

[@omowhanre]

We women are soooo damn kind and inclusive. We remember to make a disclaimer about how men do also suffer. I pray they start remembering and giving caveats for us. Amen. Lol

[@mercedescreates]

Underrated comment!

[@katgreer6113]

for real... we don't forget the mens' suffering but when it's vice versa, men don't care... guys around me are dating smaller and smaller women... idk if its just a trend or pedophilia

[@Solitaire427]

@@katgreer6113 It’s got nothing to do with pedophilia it’s gotta do with men liking women that are not out of shape. How come when a men prefers a thin woman that means he’s somehow secretly wants little girls. That’s ridiculous men just like a woman that stays in shape

[@Solitaire427]

@@katgreer6113 we don’t forget men suffering but when it’s ViceVersa men don’t care yet when Men are attracted to women that are in shape they are somehow pedophiles. A man can’t even have a preference of body size without being accused of something disgusting. So no women don’t really give a shit about the suffering of men either. They can’t even like what they like without being accused of something atrocious

[@makizenin1840]

@@Solitaire427 Dude no one said that men can't have preference. It's their choice if they like skinny girls. It's just that some men always makes fun of those girls who have a medium size body or those who are too fat(sometimes it's due to some disease also like diabetes). If men like skinny girls then they should go for it but they really need to STOP making fun of other girls If they don't fit in today's beauty standards which ultimately lead the others girls to do SUICIDE. My father itself is an example of making fun and humiliating my older sister just because she's not super skinny and super light skin. Hope you all men don't become a Father like mine. Your daughters/sons don't deserves this shitt.

[@jaredandallie1681]

My grandma passed away last year at 93 and looking back she had a very unhealthy take on weight and food. She had little to no food in her fridge and said many mean comments about weight to my mom and I and especially about other women in public.

[@soeuninseoul]

im so sorry to hear that, my grandmother has dementia and is on the verge as well. when she was well she had mental health issues from her marriage and family life. i pray our predecessors’ legacies will not define our own!

[@elinope4745]

My grandma was similar to the girls and had a huge list of things that us boys had to be and do as well. I held up my end of her unreasonable expectations though.

[@micheller3251]

It's crazy to me that people consider skinnier as more in control. For context, I'm naturally skinny and various mental health + sensory processing issues means that the worst I feel, the more I lose control of myself, the less I eat (not by choice, I just can't swallow anything without having a meltdown), the more I lose weight. So in my case, gaining weight makes me feel good about myself because it means my mental health is also good, and it has a positive impact on my physical health of course... but then I get told that when I gain weight I'm "slacking of" and that I need to "watch" myself. And when I lose weight, even when people KNOW it's because I can't eat properly, I get praised for looking "elegant" and "in shape". The message I got from that is "we don't care about how you feel, as long as you look like what we want you to". In the end, I chose to use it as a pointer to who doesn't deserve attention and care from me. I love myself too much to spend time and energy on people who encourage me to be ill. For me, being in control means looking after my health, whatever my body and mind need, not what *ssholes want me to believe i need.

[@verybarebones]

Ive been training martial arts for a long time, and my brain seems to be split between the desire to have a beautiful waifish body and the desire of being physically capable and go toe to toe against stronger people.

[@luanasilva7341]

Me playing volleyball as young tenager wishing I was good but not having a tall, curvy body like the athletes.

[@sariesy]

at some point in elementary school for about a month i wasn't eating very much at all, for reasons having to do with anxiety after i choked on a bagel at lunch lol. my parents were aware and helping me work through my anxiety and trying to get me to eat. when they made a worried comment on how skinnyand underweight i had gotten, internally i was completely overjoyed by the idea and proud (even though that hadn't been my goal or even a thought i had until that very moment!!). this was in the early 2000's. we didn't have a scale in the house and my parents never commented on my weight or anyone else's, yet somehow my mind was pleased with being underweight. i can't remember anyone else making fatphobic remarks either, and yet media had already so deeply affected my mind and how i looked at my body subconsciously to such a large extent. it's very scary to think about

[@soeuninseoul]

so much of it is driven by our own fears as well! no one ever told me to lose weight, but i hated anything that made me feel unattractive or unworthy of love, including my extra pounds and body shape. still trying to shed those fears, it’s an ongoing process & a journey ❤️

[@NoMoreUsernamesSucks]

I love that you explored the control aspect of EDs here. Towards the beginning of the pandemic I just fixated on the idea that I Could. Not. Get sick. So I started working out and eating a diet with better nutrition. Thing is I started working out until I injured myself more and more often as time went on, and if there wasn’t anything “healthy” to eat or I didn’t feel like cooking I would just not eat. It got so bad that most days my caloric intake was in the triple digits, my hair began to fall out and I’d gone months without a period. I didn’t really start to recover until I moved back in with family July 2020 and I couldn’t hide what I was doing as well. It was like being a teenaged nicotine addict all over again. It was extremely frustrating at the time, but having a little less control over what I put into my own body probably saved me from serious injury or worse.

[@soeuninseoul]

i still evenly divide my strawberries to match the number of french toasts ill make 🥲 don’t know if the ocd or the eating issues came first, but i can no longer seem to eat excessive sugar without keeping track or feel satiated without eating meat/heavy protein. sometimes having control isn’t freedom. thank you for sharing, & i pray for healing from your experience!

[@UrMom-rs1jw]

i found myself wishing i was a boy, or rather, that i had a male body. i just assumed that that was wat being transgender was like. but i’ve never minded (i still don’t, kinda love it tbh) being a woman before (i started wishing this about 2/3 years ago). i even pride myself of being a woman (bc we are so goddamn beautiful and strong). this video made me realize *why* i wanted a male body. i’m trying and working towards loving my body as how it is simply because its mine (who will love it if i dont?) but its quite hard(er than expected). i’m constantly reminded of the opinion of ‘society’, and even tho i know i shouldn’t pay attention to it (my body, my opinion, my choice) it’s hard to ignore.

[@bleachdiet559]

Only a few people in this world are truly beautiful and strong. None hang out in hateful spaces like this

[@emilia__1181]

Wtt

[@UrMom-rs1jw]

@@bleachdiet559 wait what is the ‘hateful places’ here?

[@shelby9510]

Same! I thought maybe I was trans, but I was just mourning that prepubescent body that I once had. One without period pains that cause me to be immobile and breast soreness. I’m trying to be content with my body, but having periods makes it’s hard😫

[@JamzYamz7]

As someone who’s currently struggling with anorexia but is also learning about radical feminism/ patriarchal pressures. This video was very insightful. Thank you!

[@soeuninseoul]

yesss i’m so glad!! 😘🙌🏻

[@lvmln7843]

hi, i just want to ask you to please be carfeul when exploring radical feminism because as a movement, it's unfortunately riddled with tranpshobia and bioessentialism, and many people calling themselves radical feminists are more of an anti-trans hate group than they are feminists. :(

[@tharo4390]

@@lvmln7843 I'm sorry you have been personally victimized by women acknowledging the sex-based material reality of their oppression in order to heal and to center their own liberation. Must be awful.

[@shponglechunch8056]

@@lvmln7843 I am so fucking tired of you people on their high horse saying shit like "be careful!!!" As if radical feminism is a cult or a hive mind. Seriously shut the fuck up. Terfs do not make up a large percentage of radical feminists. Stop fear mongering about shit you clearly know nothing about. 80s feminism was radical feminism and a lot of them in that movement were not anti trans even then. It is the same now. Terfs like being very vocal online but they are truly a minority that most real radical feminists condemn. I'd rather be called a proletarian/Marxist feminist but that hasn't picked up steam to be used as a term.

[@lvmln7843]

@@shponglechunch8056 why are you so agressive? why does acknowledging the fact that many transphobic people are calling themselves radical feminists bother you so much? i never said it was a hive mind, i just said that it's easy to stumble upon transphobia and bioessentialism when researching radical feminism. please chill out.

[@MELLMAO]

I find that I never want to lose weight for approval of men or women that I'm romantically interested in. For my weightloss I'm only praised by my female family members and female friends, but men don't appreciate it as much. My thiness is only for how I and female friends and family members perceive me and my control

[@soeuninseoul]

I admire the lack of seeking approval! I think it really hits the nail in the head when we realize many of what we think are beauty standards “preferred” by others is more of something we formed ourselves.

[@NoirL.A.]

well....now that feminism has had its say yet again the big bad mean awful stright male is gonna completely disrupt the proceedings with some hard cold facts that, unfortunately, still don't care about yer feelings. 1). sexual dimporphism is found all throughout the animal kingdom and with very few exceptions the male of the species is larger, stronger, more aggressive and has a higher sex drive. 2). as a result of walking upright the human female has both the most difficult periods in the animal kingdom and a body wholly unsuited to childbirth. it was an enormous evolutionary trade off and the human female got the worst of it including significantly lower upper body strength. women also have more bowel trouble for reasons not yet fully understood. mother nature is responsible here NOT straight males. 3). eating disorders are an ADDICTION not unlike drug addiction, alcoholism, compulsive gambling, etc. there is a satisfaction tradeoff and a dopamine hit at work there where overreating / binge eating affects both sexes equally but anorexia and bulimia are favored by women. why men don't get the same dopamine hit from that last two is not understood yet but anyrate no way to know because men who suffer anorexia and bulimia are rarely ever diagnosed because they almost never seek help for it as they don't for many other disorders which is why they have always committed suicide in much greater numbers than females. 4). my poor grandma was not only alcoholic but co-morbid with bulimia. she was born in 1916 before tv, movies, photography in general or even radio were available to the common folk in a time when there was nowhere near as much societal pressure to look a certain way as there was in years to come. therefore it's reasonable to assume that these issues existed long before modern media. 5). children's toys including the dolls i played with as a boy in the 70's buff males with washboard stomachs were very well represented and if you look at almost all the statues and images of shirtless males all throughout history they all look like they could be on the cover of men's fitness. therefore it's reasonable to say a certain male archetype has also been present throughout history. so girls and their barbie dolls are not the only potential victims here. 6). modern media plays on EVERYBODY's insecurities not just females. maybe it slipped yer notice but wealthy, well dressed and buffed out men are also used to sell us everything from cars to weight loss products and whatever else is supposed to make us happy. making us feel 'less than' in some way is what DRIVES modern consumerism and materialism and EVRYBODY gets screwed in the deal not just women. 7). the modern fashion industry is run and dominated almost entirely by women and gay men plus we all know women are far more likely to comment on another female's appearance especially her weight and far far more likely to call said female a "slut" or the like. be that as it may, feminists still manage to block out reality and blame heterosexual males for the problem. females are also by far the biggest consumers of celebrity worship, tabloid journalism and wealth porn. 8). as human beings male and female both we will go to any lengths to not have to take personal responsibility for our bad choices and therfore blaming others or feeling like you are somehow part of an oppressed disadvantaged minority is incredibly gratifying to the human ego which directly gives rise to victim mentality and snowflake / cancel culture. much of modern feminism is based entirely on that dynamic. 9). the concept of "divide and conquer" is as old as the human race and modern media goes to very great lengths to keep the "peasants" at each other's throats. and since within the human psyche emotion so easily overrides logic we are all regardless of sex, race, etc. WIDE OPEN to being manipulated. 10). because the human body is so weak and our species so high maintenance and resource dependent one of the ways our species survived evolutionarily was that there is a natural tendency to focus on the negative because we had to be hyper aware of anything adverse in our environment which is why it takes so little effort to make all but the most hyper arrogant prone to self doubt and low self esteem. which again leaves us all vulnerable to manipulation REGARDLESS OF SEX, RACE, etc. sermon concluded.

[@langustajableczna]

@@NoirL.A. don't flatter yourself, you didn't disrupt anything

[@NoirL.A.]

@@langustajableczna yeah...but u can't unsee it.

[@langustajableczna]

@@NoirL.A. umm no. We hear way more stupid, entiteled pseudointellectual and less insightful shit on the daily basis since the day we are born, boy

[@PrincessGloomychan]

Growing up in the late 90s, early 2000's really warped my relationship with my body. I hit puberty in 5th grade and constantly felt shamed for having womanly features, it morphed into self hatred and disordered eating. It is frustrating to constantly strive for an impossible body created by society. I completely agree the addiction to mind over body is a dangerous thing, and it's very interesting to me the dangers of ano*rexia are very rarely discussed in media.

[@thefilleinred5218]

as someone who has struggled with having a healthy relationship towards food for years, AND is a feminist... THIS WAS SOOO GOOD! :> your explanation of feminist theories really reminded me of a similar philosophy class I´ve had a few weeks ago :) thank you so much for this informative video :>

[@soeuninseoul]

Ahhh thank you!! I’m glad it could resonate 🙌🏻 it’s all thanks to my theory classes too!

[@NoirL.A.]

well....now that feminism has had its say yet again the big bad mean awful stright male is gonna completely disrupt the proceedings with some hard cold facts that, unfortunately, still don't care about yer feelings. 1). sexual dimporphism is found all throughout the animal kingdom and with very few exceptions the male of the species is larger, stronger, more aggressive and has a higher sex drive. 2). as a result of walking upright the human female has both the most difficult periods in the animal kingdom and a body wholly unsuited to childbirth. it was an enormous evolutionary trade off and the human female got the worst of it including significantly lower upper body strength. women also have more bowel trouble for reasons not yet fully understood. mother nature is responsible here NOT straight males. 3). eating disorders are an ADDICTION not unlike drug addiction, alcoholism, compulsive gambling, etc. there is a satisfaction tradeoff and a dopamine hit at work there where overreating / binge eating affects both sexes equally but anorexia and bulimia are favored by women. why men don't get the same dopamine hit from that last two is not understood yet but anyrate no way to know because men who suffer anorexia and bulimia are rarely ever diagnosed because they almost never seek help for it as they don't for many other disorders which is why they have always committed suicide in much greater numbers than females. 4). my poor grandma was not only alcoholic but co-morbid with bulimia. she was born in 1916 before tv, movies, photography in general or even radio were available to the common folk in a time when there was nowhere near as much societal pressure to look a certain way as there was in years to come. therefore it's reasonable to assume that these issues existed long before modern media. 5). children's toys including the dolls i played with as a boy in the 70's buff males with washboard stomachs were very well represented and if you look at almost all the statues and images of shirtless males all throughout history they all look like they could be on the cover of men's fitness. therefore it's reasonable to say a certain male archetype has also been present throughout history. so girls and their barbie dolls are not the only potential victims here. 6). modern media plays on EVERYBODY's insecurities not just females. maybe it slipped yer notice but wealthy, well dressed and buffed out men are also used to sell us everything from cars to weight loss products and whatever else is supposed to make us happy. making us feel 'less than' in some way is what DRIVES modern consumerism and materialism and EVRYBODY gets screwed in the deal not just women. 7). the modern fashion industry is run and dominated almost entirely by women and gay men plus we all know women are far more likely to comment on another female's appearance especially her weight and far far more likely to call said female a "slut" or the like. be that as it may, feminists still manage to block out reality and blame heterosexual males for the problem. females are also by far the biggest consumers of celebrity worship, tabloid journalism and wealth porn. 8). as human beings male and female both we will go to any lengths to not have to take personal responsibility for our bad choices and therfore blaming others or feeling like you are somehow part of an oppressed disadvantaged minority is incredibly gratifying to the human ego which directly gives rise to victim mentality and snowflake / cancel culture. much of modern feminism is based entirely on that dynamic. 9). the concept of "divide and conquer" is as old as the human race and modern media goes to very great lengths to keep the "peasants" at each other's throats. and since within the human psyche emotion so easily overrides logic we are all regardless of sex, race, etc. WIDE OPEN to being manipulated. 10). because the human body is so weak and our species so high maintenance and resource dependent one of the ways our species survived evolutionarily was that there is a natural tendency to focus on the negative because we had to be hyper aware of anything adverse in our environment which is why it takes so little effort to make all but the most hyper arrogant prone to self doubt and low self esteem. which again leaves us all vulnerable to manipulation REGARDLESS OF SEX, RACE, etc. sermon concluded.

[@VibingMeike]

@@NoirL.A. Wait what

[@annasommers790]

@@NoirL.A. the most intelligent people I know understand that facts are merely interpretations.

[@NoirL.A.]

@@annasommers790 yes that's absolutely right. once we think we know it all we become unteachable. true knowledge seekers do their best to make sure that never happens. none of us are perfect but at least the effort is made to not just cave in to the ego and the need to be right.

[@aoibheann8459]

i’m in ana recovery but holy SHIT miss girl this hit hardddd. this is honestly incredible and u should be so proud xo

[@soeuninseoul]

thank you! praying for your recovery process 💖

[@Elizabeth-qx6ip]

The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf is definitely an interesting read when it comes to 80s feminism and body image, so much of it is still relevant today (however do keep in mind the book tends to talk in a very binary perspective of gender and sexuality).

[@ananoname6494]

i found this video fascinating. i’m midsized and sometimes i desire to be smaller, not just in the sense of my body but because of my mind - i wish i was quieter, or less overbearing on people. a lot of it is bullying i endured as a child, but a lot of it is the patriarchal standard. this topic should be talked about more because it helps to understand those who have ed’s but also everyone who experienced patriarchal oppression

[@maddyharvey7414]

Wow.. I relate to this so much. I was also bullied and I am so mid sized and I definitely think my past issues were about desiring to not be seen.

[@nightworld12345]

22:04 I think it's really important to examine different types of eating disorders, and to recognise their differences. While I know you're quoting Bordo here, I would like to argue that binge eating as a disorder has always felt extremely similar to anorexia for me. I see both as a way to express a need for control, both take the form of controlling one's diet. However, you could also argue that binge eating is almost the opposite of anorexia; anorexia trying to control the body through a lack of food and binge eating trying to comfort/satisfy the body through thoughtless consumption. Both have always felt self-punishing in the way people who suffer with them express themselves (not to discount other eating disorders, this section just specifically compares these two). My own experiences with disordered eating have rationalised in my mind as all of these things; a way to try to satisfy the need for control in my life (especially over my own actions and feelings), a reaction to aesthetic standards, and a form of self-punishment or regulation. While I find the idea of the woman's body being a cultural canvas fascinating, I think that description might miss a lot of nuance that could be fascinating when examing through a feminist lens. You keep mentioning 'control' and I genuinely think that is a horrifically vital aspect of feminine development. I would argue that perhaps the woman's body is seen more as a canvas manipulated by culture (if that's what it actually means then sorry hahaha). I think the lack of active thought women are permitted over their bodies in every aspect of society and from such a young age is a huge perponant of a lot of issues women face.

[@anna-lisanuss3919]

I can't believe that this video does not have more likes! This is blowing my mind. I have had these ideas in my head, but this video helped me structure it to actually understand the double bind. All the binaries of the patriarchy are literally making us sick.

[@soeuninseoul]

Yessss 🙌🏻 it’s so freeing to be able to put these struggles into terms! History/former studies can help us understand so much of what we face today-there really is nothing new under the sun! 😅

[@abbinallydraws3560]

I have been in a struggle with my body-image for a long, long time. "Just be more confident" or "Just love yourself" never worked for me and struggling to rebell against these societal expectations sometimes feels impossible and like you are all alone. Do you think it is even possible for us as a society to overcome this vanity?

[@soeuninseoul]

thats probably for another video LOL but i do believe we live in a broken world and pressures for improvement for men or women, comparisons, unrealistic ideals & standards are nothing new 🥲 i find hope & strength in a life beyond and in the meantime to ground my identity in something that won’t fluctuate with trends and time, not dictated by societal standards (living that out is another story but i thank God im growing in it daily!)

[@dejstoney]

I feel like people arn’t going to change. Only thing you can do is change the people that are around you because people will always be mean to one another. It’s very hard to reprogram cultural bias. I’m a very big person and know some of the politics people have against fat people are hurtful so I stay away from them because I know everyone in the comments will fight my opinion. Ppl lack compassion and always have.

[@nicole9856]

personally ive come to embrace the vanity i deal with myself (weight, hair, makeup, shaving etc) and i learn to love the features that would need $$$$. but im more insecure about my personality than my looks so it works for me. as long as i realize that shaving and doing makeup to look presentable is not at all feminists, but that's okay.

[@90sstargirl]

🥺

Ive always considered myself as a rational person, but when it comes to body image and my ED I find myself unable to control my thoughts and emotions. Im completely unpredictable, erratic and absurdly sensitive. I’ve always been haunted by the idea that my worth as a woman is lower because of my bigger body. I wonder how different I’d be if I had been able to live a life free of disordered eating and insecurities. By this point I still can’t tell how much trauma caused my Ed and how much trauma my Ed has caused me. I guess that’s what makes it so hard to battle.

[@rizma_dizma4391]

I love the causal body shaming in some of these comments on a BODY IMAGE video.

[@sophspice-zl7mn]

"the mind commands itself and meets resistance" oh boy do i know this feeling all too well😭

[@iu9130]

This video was feeling so unrelated until she mentioned many women what to remove their feminine parts. Breast reduction is something I always thought I'll do when I grow up. Also the male voice which she talked about I can confirm it's real

[@madelinevlogs5898]

I’m getting one in a few months and I’d be lying if I said I was only doing it for myself

[@verybarebones]

I think it's the age we grew in. I was born in the 90s and heroin chic was THE thing. Breasts and hips were low class (including some racist connotations, yes) and not feminine.

[@sarahuy7628]

My college degree literally focuses on these types of issues and critically analyzes it so I'm so glad this was KZbin recommended this to me!

[@soeuninseoul]

that’s amazing! what is your degree??

[@callmebyyourname1696]

What is your degree

[@simonepon]

When I was 22, my then boyfriend dumped me saying I had “gained too much weight and was no longer sexually attractive” to him. This was after I was diagnosed with MDD and had started antidepressants. I wasn’t able to look at pictures of myself for years. Even now I struggle with my self image, but it’s not nearly as bad as it used to be.

[@Erin-zb9yj]

It's clear you've given this topic much research. As someone who's struggled with anorexia for several years in the past I found this incredibly insightful. Thank you!

[@marigabyba5786]

The KZbin algorythm nailed it this time. I am so glad I found you. This video is so good, super informative, well supported, but best of all you are incredible, super well spoken and likeable, the way you present the information in a easy to understand enjoyable way is sheer perfection. I already liked and subscribed and I surely hope to see more of you.

[@soeuninseoul]

🥺🥺🥺 THANK YOU 😭❤️ will bring more your way soon!

[@alisiademi]

The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf is a life changing book!

[@katerinaklutz3239]

This is amazing content. I have so much gratitude and respect for you! I was raised by lesbians in a super feminist household but also developed an eating ed. I love the way you broke everything down on a deeper level, we always hear "we develop ed because it's the only place we have total control in our lives" and that "it's not the victim's fault for developing ed" but the way you broke it all down made it intellectually graspable for me for the first time. Also I'd love to know your perspective on Monk/religious leaders who isolate themselves and eat very little (one bowl of rice per day) and if that is also connected to this mind is more important than the body concept. As a person who always looked at those people as "enlightened" now I wonder if they are just trapped in the same sexist concept that will power of the mind is more valuable than the body. As men have more power and are associated with intellect, willpower, mind and women emotions and body and women hold less power in society. Perhaps their religious practices were never truly to reach 'enlightenment' but just a manifestation of what society has presenting since ancient times, mind > body. Willpower over the body is the goal.

[@joedatura1023]

My mother raised me to be anorexic because she was deeply traumatised by fatphobia in her teenage years and developed anorexica because of it that she never got rid of. I think that we live in a society that highly objectifies women to the point where only our physical existence on this plane of existence is important. Being female in this society is a highly traumatising experience in that regard. In my opinion this runs deeply into our past when women were still married off and your physicality was the capital deciding if you were going to get a good husband or not. Also, weight and the idealisation of different body types is also largely associated with financial and social status, as to this day curvy and thick bodies are idealised in society where food is rare. In our current day and age, it's a sign of wealth to be able to stay very thin as it implies that there is no fear of lack of resources and starvation as something tangible that could happen to you. Being fit also implies that you have time and resources to spend on shaping your body, which is also another facette of wealth in today's economy. Also, thin bodies for women and men alike imply youth, so fresh genes for potential children when it comes to gamete production in humans. All of these things are highly biological, which is also one of the reasons why eds are so hard to kick to the curb. It goes against our instincts to reduce our attractiveness for potential mates, both on a biological and a sociological level. Your video is really interesting and I love the connections you make. Keep em coming. 💯

[@EmelieWaldken]

Not really linked to eating disorders but I just want to comment on the teenage girls not wanting to grow into a more "womanly figure". As a female who doesn't feel a connection to neither womanhood nor motherhood (if you wanna label it, name it agender, although I don't feel like having any gender at all really, and I'm also fine being perceived as a woman, as long as I'm not mistreated for it) (living in Scandinavia really helps for that bit)... I've never been okay with the idea of the hourglass, mother-like figure. I don't want it, it represents a femininity and motherhood I don't feel and don't want - not because I am sexist, I fully respect women who want these, I just don't feel them for myself. And something I'm trying to learn is that NOT ALL ADULT WOMEN ARE CURVY. Not all mothers are hourglass-shaped. I've seen plenty of mothers of 3+ kids who had flat chests, flat butts, were tiny, had narrow hips even, and also plenty who were athletic (I mean really athletic, like with full visible muscles) before and after pregnancy. As much as being round and curvy can happen to young women/teenagers who haven't had children, being flat and thin can happen to older women / mothers. I'd say that stretch marks and perhaps less toned bellies are much more marks of pregnancy than curviness/weight in general. I know, my two paragraphs are kinda opposing each other - as said, I'm myself trying to de-learn the association curvy=motherlike.

[@juliee593]

Wow it feels so good to find someone with the same gender identity! I've also never related to femininity or wanted a womanly body, not because of trauma but just because I feel like it doesn't represent me. I also think I'm agender but don't mind people seeing me as a woman as long as they don't associate stereotypes to that term. Thank you so much for sharing, I feel much less alone now.

[@ElectroSocketBlues]

I love to see people on KZbin doing this kind of critical work and revitalizing the ideas of past feminist moments! I think there are challenges and changes that need to be made--i.e. the feminist preoccupation with anorexia can fail to serve actual ED survivors when binge eating disorder is a far more common manifestation of disordered eating, not to mention feminism's historically (and contemporarily) fraught relationship to trans rights and sex work--but I find so much meaning and value in feminist theory of the body and I do think we can honor and explore these ideas in a radically inclusive way. Next I hope to see feminists on KZbin discussing Helene Cixous and Silvia Federici!

[@natatatm]

This is my favorite comment

[@lvmln7843]

I love this comment and I love that you mentioned trans people and sex work!

[@gabm9128]

This is the first video I’ve seen of yours, so I don’t know your plans for the future. However, your way of analyzing and communication these texts that are so often dense is so incredible. If you have not, PLEASE consider going into some form of education. You have a serious, natural talent of taking “dense” texts and making them accessible to everyone. I’m an English major (going into secondary education) and I sincerely hope that I am able to communicate ideas through texts as effortlessly as you appear to do. You’ve done a wonderful job and this video was nothing below stellar.

[@soeuninseoul]

ahhh thank you, i’ve always thought of going into academics as an option but i always felt more myself in a creative zone 💖 thank you for your encouraging words!

[@KatieeeBug03]

Wow wow wow thank you for discussing this. I’m so glad I found your content. I have struggled since I was 11 with my changing body. I grew up with three brothers and I am jealous of the casual way they seem to regard their bodies. I’ve always wanted to be covered, bundled, and swaddled in my clothes. All the while they run around in just boxers. I’ve always felt like my post puberty body is a distraction from who I am. Like it would be easier to chop certain pieces off. I’ve never struggled with an eating disorder and I’ve never felt the desire to transition, but you’ve connected the way that all of these issues intersect. This helped me put my feelings into perspective Thank you.

[@darias8328]

this was so insightful, i had to put my phone down 5 minutes in since I didn't want to miss a thing. i don't think I've ever heard of viewing EDs through this lense, mostly solely as a need for control. but on my journey, I could definitely relate to wanting to shrink myself, fearing to appear too feminine, too fertile. as if it would signal to the world that it's my sole purpose in life. there are just so many layers to this issue. And I am grateful you put so much work into this essay, thanks!

[@aixacota5499]

as a women that is part of the latina community i feel the pressure to be in the curvy side i don’t know if this is just me

[@nora4642]

Hey bb it’s “foo - coe” sincerely a girl who spent too much time reading Foucault in grad school (and French is hard)

[@soeuninseoul]

French is hard LOL i learned it 7 years and can only say “je pense que…” 🥲

[@halodeer]

I love this video so much. I relate to women of the 80s in that I don’t want large breasts and I want to be lean because I know people see me differently as a woman. I want so badly to be ambiguous but I can’t tell if it’s because of what I want or if it’s because it will be easier to navigate a patriarchal world… very interesting subject and awesome video

[@lizzielambert1563]

as someone who has finally come slightly more at peace with my body just being a little bigger than most and coming out of my Anorexia from last year, this is so fascinating to watch on the other side of the deep end. it almost feels like a milestone so thank you for providing that ♡

[@soeuninseoul]

I’m so thankful you were able to overcome your battle! Know it’s a journey though (as someone who’s still vaguely swimming in the pool) 😅 proud of your growth and hope to bring more resources and inspiration through this channel 🥰

[@blacklavoux]

Man wants to be seen with beautiful skinny woman who dress well and will make other man stares at her. But in reality, they want a little bit of meat from woman. Therefore, skinny woman tend to do plastic surgery, get bigger breast, shaping their ass, and voila, creates the perfect body a man will die for. This is reality. I'm a tall asian, and when i gain weight, my boobs grew big and i look sexier, and when i loose weight, my boobs are gone, but makes me look like a model. so i stayed in between. And that's not the only issue i have as a natural born woman. So i just live my life to be healthy and not to be bothered anymore. 🤷‍♀

[@user-jd4fz7ws2s]

thank u this makes me so happy !! i gained like 15 pounds for health reasons & even tho i'm healthy now it somehow feels like a failure 😭💗

[@soeuninseoul]

I know the struggle too well-never feel like a failure being healthy and strong! (i say when i need to hear it myself 🥲)

[@loverrlee]

Only our messed up society can make you feel bad about being healthy. Healthy should be a GOOD thing we all strive for! 🥺

[@sapphostan9114]

Thank you for this video. I've been confused for a very long time trying to reconcile the fact that I have an eating disorder with my identity as both a feminist and a lesbian. This video managed to explore the topic in a way that brought me a lot of insight and clarity, putting to words things that I have felt for a long time. Can't thank you enough. Just subscribed!

[@soeuninseoul]

Ahhh thank you so much! And happy you were able to process those parts of your identity 🥰

[@loveinthetimeof-kaisoloera2564]

Great video essay! I learned a lot and really related to wanting to maintain the kind of androgyny about my body to avoid being sexualized and it was interesting to get that perspective.

[@OpinionatedMatt]

I remember when Sigourney Weaver and Kate Moss were status symbols appearances wise. One representing the more "masculine" femininity coupled with the stronger features of '80s fashion and the other symbolizing the ideal very slender body in the late '90s.

[@sophiemoo6787]

how do you not have more subscribers??? I have a feeling you will soon! loved the video! :D

[@soeuninseoul]

awwwh thank you! yes must get back to uploading again 🥰

[@KillDjay]

It’s the screen grabs. They just aren’t giving. I’m lucky I took the time to read the whole title. I don’t always and I know a lot of people don’t and even so, I was genuinely surprised at the tone of the video and the cheeky humor and cutesy editing, mixed with the serious education at play.

[@FollowerofDuck]

as someone who used to suffer from an eating disorder, i really needed to see this, especially now as a radical feminist who realizes that part of the reason why i even went through that was because of my feeling a lack of control and patriarchal pressure

[@abigail_rhm]

I’m currently in the midst of an eating disorder and I truly appreciate the accuracy of this video, everything was just spot on. The voices, the goals and everything! There are many misconceptions about eating disorders that simply simmer it down to wanting to be skinny bc a model is skinny. P.S I’ve been binging your videos tonight and I still cannot believe the “low” sub count, you deserve so many more, great highlight quality video essays.

[@angelineblue]

Wow thank you that was mind-blowing!! I never thought my eating disorder was influenced by culture & society because it felt like my way of taking control and not wanting to have the typical female body. Through your video I recognize how the view of feminine, curvier women as domestic and controlled was what I tried to avoid to protect myself from being seen as an object

[@haileys5224]

So happy I got this video recommended to me. it’s incredibly well constructed and I can’t wait to stick around to see what else your channel has in store ❤️

[@throughcolouredglasses9300]

Thank you so much for breaking down critical theory AND referencing where you got it from omg I love this

[@Maria-vy1im]

This is an amazing video! I struggle with anorexia and I wasn't sure how to put it into words but this was perfect. I will make sure to show this to anyone who needs to get educated on the topic

[@soeuninseoul]

thank you! please refer to other sources as well, as i’m not a medical expert on eating disorders! but i’m glad it was able to help process :)

[@SoVidushi]

I had a slight brush with disordered eating during my adolescent and early teen years, this video was almost therapeutic and I have never felt so understood before.

[@amandagdomingos]

This is one of the best videos I've seen this year. Thank you so much for it! 💜

[@pettyella6607]

i think Laurie Penny speaks very well on this in the first chapter of Unspeakable Things. it's about their personal story but they have this feminist view so it's both heart breaking and enlightening. great video :)

[@Sara-ip8dr]

What the heck! Seeing you had 1.4k subscribers surprised me so much - you deserve more definitely with all the work I can tell you put into your videos. Grateful to be here before you blow up🥰

[@gbriellamedeiros5971]

I am forever grateful for youtube recommending me your video! Thank you so much for talking about this in such an informative and interesting way! At sooo many times my mind was blown and I would just nod my head and think “the world needs to know this!!!” so thank you for being here. Just subscribed ❤️ Love from Brazil

[@ariichans]

This is so eye opening!!! Thank you for making this 💕💕

[@frommeghan]

Wow this was so mind-blowing for me! I had always only thought "media and society want women to hate their bodies to make money off of us," never once realizing how much deeper it goes, and the complexities of how these eating disorders develop from nuanced societal standards. Thank you for your research and this video!

[@em6644]

I really appreciate you pointing out how much dualism plays into this. So often we try to counter these problems by saying that we have to love our bodies, but my body is myself. And if you starve yourself it affects you mind too, they’re interconnected. It makes us more easy to control. There’s a reason why fasting and sleep deprivation are cult tactics - you can’t think as critically if you’re hungry.. Obviously misogyny is at the root of it, but it’s helpful to recognise the other patterns of thought that are used to reinforce it

[@taromilktea08]

6:20 it’s crazy how you explained what happened to me in the point of my life where i was thinnest

[@evalolz6044]

I loved the balance between reflecting the research and your own interpretation on the topic. This made it so informative and digestiable at the same time! I’m going to subscribe and looking forward to the next video!

[@prerza]

i'm so glad i came across this video, they're enlightening and really needed to be talked about so much more~!

[@33elena33]

Your video essay is amazing. Thank you so much for shring your founds and educating other!

[@otsukaharu4501]

I never thought of eating disorders through this perspectice. This was really insightful, thank you for your detailed research 🌼 Looking forward to more of your work 🧡

[@fanartasmr9190]

Beautifully worded - you described these concepts and feelings in ways I wish I could!

[@evelynmason3424]

this video was amazing. so many thoughts I've had over the years about women's body image but never really figured out, you explained perfectly.

[@raissalucilia4098]

Algorithm recommended your video and it's great!! I'm from Brazil and even growing up in a different culture, I've been struggling with an eating disorder since my childhood. And when I look back I realize how my relationship with food was full of guilt and shame. Thanks for sharing such valuable information

[@langustajableczna]

even in a video for women, on women, by a woman we still need to overapologize for not centering men in our conversation. So sad. Nothing helped me with anorexia more than radical feminism.

[@lyingtomycore-1845]

I was thinking about that yk. Wondering if the reason guys bring up/discuss their issues on media(videos, blogs, etc) where the topic is about women is because there’s nowhere else they can talk about it? A couple of videos on YT about how men are effected in the patriarchy are from a few years ago. No one’s talking about it much except for women who address the patriarchy as a whole. Modern men nowadays are more focused on wanting to be “alpha males” and such; that’s their focused topic. But for the men who want to speak on the patriarchy with other men, there’s not much space for them to do so (unless you look hard enough probably). The way they go about this is so wrong, though. They always undermine women when they speak up, in order to voice their own thoughts. How are you going to get people to empathize with you if you continuously invalidate their experiences?

[@tharo4390]

Thank you, my thoughts exactly!!

[@langustajableczna]

@@lyingtomycore-1845 they can make their own spaces. They have no problems with creating spaces for extreme female exploitation and misogyny (fascism, incels). We are not to baby adult men who can't function with the society their kind created.

[@kungfukenny1793]

@@langustajableczna I want to hear u speak more

[@mockingbirdnightingale7169]

I'm so glad you mentioned this and I completely agree. Feminism is for and about women and girls, full stop. We don't need, want, or have time to fix men's problems that they create for themselves, we're busy working on the problems they create for us.... Yes, radical feminism is definitely the way to go.

[@CarolinaPerez-yz6pz]

Fantastic, I really enjoyed this and I am now so excited what you tackle on next in this series!

[@gbibim]

I'm so glad I stumbled on this video. I've been wanting to learn more about feminism its relation to eating disorders and the modern fitness industry. You earned my follow and I would be so happy to see more content like this.

[@kimhyunjinsgf]

love this video format,, very informative,, thank you for your work! 🤍

[@entitled_little_cat]

Knowledge like this is so important to understanding generational trauma & how our parents and grandparents were raised - feel like I understand myself and the women in my family so much more now ✨

[@riojh6353]

Dang. This was very good. I will be showing this to my husband. He grew up in a household with very strong views on "healthy" body images. Now that we have young children we have talked more about both of our view points. I am not good at explaining my thoughts very well but this video was just so great and concise. Thank you!

[@deIcorazon]

ahhh so happy yt recommended this to me

[@brookeschmidt8482]

I needed this today. Thank you!

[@katherinec6031]

I really appreciate the way you break down concepts and put them together so coherently, and with a willingness to say these things boldly. Telling the truth is a powerful influence for good. In my own journey with the subjects of this video and related things, much of my progress has come from listening to other women (and myself) when the actual reality of why these things are is being made clear. Knowing why lets us decide if it’s a good enough reason; if it’s not, then also to find what we really want for our own sakes and own selves.

[@ninispeaches]

THIS WAS SOOO CAPTIVATING! Thank you for sharing. I learned and loved the topic so much!

[@AmyThaBest]

KZbin really came through with the recs today, thank you for this amazing video!!

[@soeuninseoul]

🥰🥰🥰 awh tysm!

[@aliaelborai]

Thank you for articulating things in such a clear way. This video really spoke to me.

[@jueedhar1545]

I really appreciate your work on this videoessay ... i am so glad i stumbled upon ur YT channel !

[@soeuninseoul]

Thank you so much! Will be bringing more soon 🥰

[@victoriasanchez5214]

Thanks so much for making a video about this topic!!! Made an essay about this topic for my psychology class last year. Interesting theres a dualistic construction between anorexia and bulimia and how they both represent the extremes of different female archytypes. As a person who used to had an ED in my teens, this whole analysis is very accurate. Love your videos!!

[@Chatxolotl]

I strongly recommend "Beauté fatale" or "Fatal beauty" in english (not sure about the english title though) by Mona Chollet that tackles theses issues in a very pleasant and synthetic way.

[@lordjuju8843]

I feel like part of the reason why I don't necessarily identify as a woman (my pronouns are they/she) is because of this want to be like a man. By having boyish features, I would essentially be able to mimic men, and feel powerful. Since I was young, I didn't feel like a woman, which definitely ties into that, but ever since stopping my sport due to injury, I've been feeling a need to be more boyish, to be smaller.

[@evBeef]

I think i was quite similar, finding things like what's spoken about in this book and reading older feminist works really helped reconcile being female and accepting it. i wanted to 'be like a man' to avoid sexism. that's not my fault nor my body nor my sex's fault.