90 Day Fiancé - (Nicole & Azan #42) - No Grenada - Therapist Reacts

[@StandardSoulofLight]

The last few titles lol... "Nicole & Azan: No Wedding. No Store. No Grenada."

[@poshdoesmakeup1926]

Lol!!! I was thinking the same

[@mariamnavarro4548]

No love

[@mvlenaaa]

No maturity :)

[@cloudsfluff5505]

He is using her and you are always giving him money. Quit making excuses for him. He is a loser and quit using your daughter he is not her father

[@allthatsheiz]

But plenty money spent

[@AshleighTaylorM]

I’m thinking if she weren’t trying to prove her family wrong, she would have made a much larger deal out of this.

[@kairu5607]

So true! Maybe she’d have even left him by now.

[@optionhotdogmeowkshake4090]

Yep. Classic example of quite adolescent behaviour of when a parent makes it clear they don't approve of a relationship, you overlook red flags to "prove them wrong"

[@saraforney3940]

I just commented something similar, Ashleigh! I agree totally

[@mrodgers3910]

Good point, it feels like she has no soft place to fall within her family. Which sadly appears to leave her more vulnerable.

[@rubinevanille]

Thanks for pumping a lot of content out the last few weeks! It is very appreciated!

[@kmonkey8874]

thanks for the content 😇

[@singingLouieLouie]

I feel so spoiled

[@kat_likemeow]

I feel like Nicole is staying with azan just to spite her parents. Like she must know their relationship is a sham but doesn't want to be wrong and her mom to be right

[@habeashumor9814]

That could have a lot to do with it, Feeling the need to prove everyone wrong including everyone who watches the show.

[@janetklumper6048]

I did the same things when i was young, stille regretting that

[@ergotoxicosis]

ding ding ding ding ding this is the correct andwer

[@snoox27]

Her mother maybe but her dad is supportive.

[@useresponsibly5317]

To spite her family and all of MO and the US. If she gets off the shame train she'll have to admit that hundreds of thousands of people were right and she was wrong and she is literally the most stubborn mule I've ever seen in my life! Idk y her Mom gives her $ after she sends all of hers to Hassan?? Or why she never calls Nicole out on her indignant, ungrateful, total lack of respect for her families sacrificing money and time for her chasing this man at the expense of her daughters education.

[@habeashumor9814]

Ah The unnamed family emergency… The one he could give NO details about to the partner he is about to marry.

[@AisforApple1346]

We STILL don’t know what happened here. Or what the emergency was.

[@cloudsfluff5505]

Another lie

[@amberdermul3306]

Well, to be fair, he's clearly not about to marry her... 😅

[@xxvessy]

I'm wondering who initiated and paid for the trip

[@catspajamas2961]

She physically assaulted him and apparently she hasn't gotten any counseling for it, so even he he weren't a scammer, the healthy reaction for him would be not to have a further relationship with her. Although it looks like he's dragging the relationship out for the money.

[@allthatsheiz]

Being on the show. Big money

[@LunaFaerie22]

I hope Nicole is able to move on and just leave Azan alone. I think it’s pretty clear that he does not want to marry her.

[@LunaFaerie22]

@Itsjusta Hemi Most likely true they do know stuff that we don’t. The one time I can recall Nicole’s mother questioning her parenting skills was when she said something about May calling Azan dad and how Nicole had her daughter calling her ex bf dad too. I think it was one of the Tell All’s. Other than that, I can agree that her parents never seemed to say anything else about her parenting skills in the show but then again the crew isn’t with them 24/7.

[@cloudsfluff5505]

I agree 1000th precent

[@MagicUzer]

​@Itsjusta Hemi there are far worse things like also letting these men you let your daughter call daddy also change your daughters diapers, but I guess you'll have an excuse for that too seeing as you've been caping for nicole all throughout the comments. The Jacob shit is not Nicole's story, so we can't suppose it until we know. "If May were in danger" ..uuum Entertainment cares about money and nothing else, where have you been? May is in danger of being as unstable as her mother.

[@cloudsfluff5505]

@@LunaFaerie22 very true. I really don't think Nicole is mature enough to be a mom.

[@KShugyo]

Nicole is living in la-la fantasyland. It doesn't matter if Azan is telling the truth or not. He's totally undependable - that makes for a poor husband, step/father, lover, etc. Nicole's denial is her go-to strategy for things she doesn't want to deal with.

[@snoox27]

I think Alan has been babied, he doesn't seem to have a responsible bone in his body. Except when it comes to his cultural responsibilities.

[@cloudsfluff5505]

So very true

[@sirmel11]

@@snoox27 aren't the women normally in charge in his culture? maybe that could have caused it. like you said he's been babied all his life.

[@Lilyrose23]

As a Muslim and African, I doubted Azan’s intentions when he refused to marry her quickly. If you watched the other Muslim men in this show they all marry right away because they know they can’t have a relationship without that so him refusing to marry her is a big sign that he wants her far away. He admitted that she had to lose weight in order for him to marry her and she didn’t lose the weight so Nicole is part of her own “scam”.

[@leionarose]

Have you watched the current season with Brittney and Yazan? It really supports what you say. He seems to love her and is trying his hardest to get married quickly.

[@kokolatte825]

I don't think Hassan is a strict Muslim. He was already having relations with her from the beginning.

[@nothingaboutbehos4458]

I can support that as a muslim, too!

[@deelaljee7138]

He is not happy, that she doesn't embrace his culture, more than her weight. He has gotten her exercising, as that is something he can change. He is weighing things from his perspective and is coming to the conclusion,, that this relationship is not going to work. There are several factors here he has been considering. He may not be a strict Muslim, however, his family members are.

[@koobie83]

@@deelaljee7138 I wouldn’t ever doubt that Nicole catfished him too, and probably made sure her photos didn’t accurately show her weight to him. He scammed her. She scammed him.

[@evanz2704]

I'm still convinced that the $6000 went to Azan's family who had lost about that amount due to the wedding getting cancelled the first time. At least I hope so, because that would actually be a good thing.

[@TrishisFlabbergasted]

That actually makes a lot of sense!

[@cloudsfluff5505]

Totally agree

[@optionhotdogmeowkshake4090]

Yep and the shop was a lie Nicole came up with to cover it

[@allthatsheiz]

@@optionhotdogmeowkshake4090 and she really shouldn't have lied. But the thing is she took that money from her parents to pay the family back. If she had her own job then it wouldn't be a problem. Now her family feels she owes them

[@Literarium7]

All That She Iz she had a job at the time. I’d be surprised if she was able to save the $6000 all on her own but she did have a job.

[@madelineadams4144]

Another theory is that maybe Azan isn't a "scammer", but just not that into Nicole, and not mature enough to break up with her or tell her the truth.

[@LG-of8ue]

You know scammers don’t just scam one person at a time generally. They kept many women/men on the hook and collect money from each one.

[@optionhotdogmeowkshake4090]

I thought that. And there are easier ways to scam people but Nicole is proving herself to be an easy target unfortunately

[@crazyworld6793]

He had alot of women.

[@Meshea462]

He has admitted to talking to multiple women and the fact he didn’t have relations with them just makes me think he’s just leading them on too

[@inubakablog]

Yep! Spot in.

[@kokolatte825]

There have been so many allegations and rumors surrounding him. No proof though except for those voice mails which sounded like playing around to me. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@annaamericanaccent9184]

Azan may not be a true scanner - but that does not make him good husband material. People have broken up for a lot less and for good reason.

[@tonichan89]

I suspect my Canon isn't a true scanner either cus my pc can't frickin find it even though it's RIGHT THERE

[@kayann100]

I suspect he’s an opportunist more so than a scammer

[@kokolatte825]

Yeah, I mean I think I would break up if my fiance went on a date and took off their ring and that's after cheating.

[@kokolatte825]

@@kayann100 same. After she didn't lose any weight when she said she would and beat him publicly I think he checked out and decided to make the most of it.

[@mazzmj5809]

I think that no matter what Azan does, Nichole will stay with him. I feel like she doesn't want to be embarrassed and her family saying - we tried to tell you.

[@bellvalentinee]

YUP! I was thinking the same

[@RockyDaTherapist]

I don’t know if it’s true but there’s a rumor that the family emergency was that someone went into labor with his child...

[@KatXYZ]

Then she needs to take the L & leave him... 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️😒😒😒

[@spectacularmango1679]

The only "good" thing about Azan is that he seems to genuinely like May.

[@inubakablog]

My dad really liked the kids his money mommas had before they met him. Treated them like gold, better than his bio kids even! But as soon as the money dries up, so does that affection :(

[@literarykitten]

I'm an English major and self-professed "word nerd". Language is, quite literally, a string of sounds with cultural associations. As long as you are sending a meaning and the receiver is accepting the meaning with relatively little interference, then there is no problem with the words that you are saying ☺️

[@cyberfiretiger5825]

Belayed quite nicely 😃

[@Hadria7777]

Absolutely true

[@snoox27]

Katie i couldn't agree more. When I was working I worked with elderly italians. Most had dementia and I didn't speak any Italian. I picked up enough words to get my message across. If you take time and actually invest time to listen to what someone is actually saying, great communication happens. I really miss my job it was very fulfilling.

[@literarykitten]

@@snoox27 it's not quite the same but I used to work in a motel and I studied Spanish for eight years then immediately forgot half of it (pretty much all of the service staff were solely Spanish speaking). I can absolutely attest that the string of sounds you make means so much less than the intent behind them. Decades later, I still miss the team there and their no-questions-asked kindness at a beffudled strangeling, haha.

[@maxfitnesstraining1585]

Azan is onto a cash cow with Nicole, he'll stick around for as long as she's giving him money. You say he hasn't had a job for years that's because Nicole *IS* his job! He gets a regular salary from her in return for him just having a few lack lustre Skype calls each week. Nicole is not doing anything to help herself, no apartment of her own, no school for May, no school for her to try to improve the economic future for herself and her daughter, she just sends money to Azan and waits for the little crumbs of attention he gives every now and then. Sad.

[@mahs7620]

I’m so grateful for these educational videos, and I also appreciate the hard work of Dr. Kirk Honda’s *wife* behind the scenes. *Thank you, Stacy!* 🙏 😊

[@bren4055]

“If you don’t know what I’m talking about just ignore this”.. 😂wish I had a professor like that

[@caseyw.6550]

I just wonder what Azan was thinking by agreeing to be on this show if it was all a scam. I think people just call it a scam because he is a foreigner. American men act exactly like Azan all the time and we just call them deadbeats. It's never framed as a scam.

[@Meshea462]

I think it’s mainly bc he came on a show that had a specific purpose and he’s just using it to either drain her money or clout maybe both. He isn’t the only one people thought was a scam couple.

[@t.carter]

Are we just going to ignore the fact that she took off with no concern for her daughter and the brother and producer just had to care for her?

[@Superibis.]

I feel so called out by this extract in particular, because I'm typically the kind of person who will make up anything to turn a "this person just doesn't like you and is making excuses to not see you" into "that's got nothing to do with you, he's just having trouble/is sick/injured...", basically making something negative into something positive... And that's a real struggle and it hurts to see how ridiculous it looks from the outside :/ But hey, that's a necessary step to grow up and evolve ^^

[@Emily-lh5kq]

Everyone has their moments, and it is IMMENSELY common for people to use denial or rationalization as a defense mechanism. You're learning and growing from those experiences, and that's definitely not ridiculous. We're all stumbling through life rn and that's okay bc it's all part of the process, like you said. Best of luck!

[@Superibis.]

@@Emily-lh5kq aw thank you very much :)

[@susanriddle9408]

Me too! I have done incredible mental gymnastics trying to make something work. A lot of wasted life time ect. Now in my 50s and it makes me sad.

[@lindsay9838]

I wish I had a little bit of that in me! I always just assume the worst because I’m insecure. But a good way to ground yourself when you’re in that situation is just to remember: When someone has feelings for you, they WANT to see you, just like you can’t wait to spend time with someone when you like them. And if someone truly has feelings for you, they’ll make you a priority. People always make time for things they really want. If you’re just an opportunity, not a priority, they don’t deserve you. The right person, who really really cares, will never let anything stand in the way of spending time with you. I hope, if you haven’t already since this thread is 10 months old, that you find someone who appreciates and adores you♥️

[@bethewalt7385]

I have a dear friend in Agadir, he's a university graduate in French studies from Lausanne in France and it's very hard to get a job in Agadir at least, if you're fortunate and get a job it can be difficult to keep it, it's a lot of nepotism, cronyism, politics, who you know etc....

[@satyati]

Lausanne is in Switzerland

[@DiscoFiesta]

Zain has a channel on here and he is from Morroco and pretty much debunks this myth. Azan admits he had a job until Nicole started paying him to talk to her and be on call 24/7. Why work....but he doesn't really want to spend time with her anymore so he's stringing her along for years now.

[@vellabella1]

@@DiscoFiesta She probably gives him more money than he made while working, If he was smart, he would do both. Jobs there either don't pay much or they don't exist. on a sad note..I just saw a news article where 3 Moroccans, and 2 Algerians died 4 months ago and they just found their bodies in a container , trying to enter an EU Country. Unfortunately, these stories are frequent, there is a reason these men keep risking their lives. It is not an excuse for him using her but you can see why it is hard to walk away from that money.Especially since she willingly gives him money

[@rachelmason5066]

Dr Kirk, you are a metahuman! One in a million! I've learned so much from watching you. I needed a role model like you in my life, and I'm very grateful to have found your channel.

[@deedouglas580]

I don’t think necessarily that the Azan “dating” Nicole for a long time means he can’t also be scamming her. Why toss a woman away when she continues to provide money. It’s infinitely easier to keep scamming the same person for money than finding new people.

[@vellabella1]

yep, he won't be able to find another fool that would give him money, like that. They would be suspicious right away

[@allthatsheiz]

But scamming assumes that the other doesn't know or agree to the arrangement. And Nicole knows what is happening here. He never gave her physical affection, said he want really attracted to her. All of that. She knew when she tried to 🥊him down . Thats why she was so angry subconsciously she knew he didn't want her.

[@carina0081]

I remember when I watched this episode, what I felt was that Nicole was pretty violent in her first reaction, that is not shown here, but that was my impression from the footage I saw, like very childish behaviour, slamming doors and running away nowhere to be find with her daughter there... I was in awe.

[@daringone657]

The writing is on the wall but she does not want to see it.

[@yoshiew05]

She doesn’t read

[@n4musica]

She sees it, but she thinks denying it will stop everyone else from seeing it too

[@cindylou2311]

I think Azan would literally do anything to avoid physical contact with Nicole. The whole purpose of the Granada trip was for them to finally share a room. When she called him and said they'd be in one room he looked scared.

[@kanashinamida339]

Yeah I noticed that too, he doesn’t want to be with here

[@marisapetrucelli5574]

He is married

[@riri12566]

The whole thing about belay cracked me up 😂 I say it's OK as long as we know what you mean and to be honest it's endearing that smart people/professors use words wrong too 😂

[@MJ-vb7un]

Hi Doc. I love this show and you have so much insight, however there are a lot of cultural components that ofcourse you won’t get cause you’re not Moroccan, I am. There are a lot of men like Azan, that look for foreign woman, Azans behaviour is not a man in Morocco that loves his partner, he would never get away with this type of thing here, also because a woman here would never accept it I think he doesn’t want to hurt her, but after he initially saw her in the airport he never wanted to get married. Azan is very aware of what’s right and wrong, we don’t need to make any excuses for him. 2 wedding cancelled, trip cancelled people’s money and time. He is fully aware and would never do to a Moroccon family. Maybe in America you guys can have a lot of justifications but in Morocco no way.

[@kmonkey8874]

who runs out of the house for 10+ minutes and leaves their child

[@GabriellaT21]

To be fair...her brother and father were there. We have no idea if she said "hey guys - do you mind watching May for a few minutes". Calling her a shameful mother for something that is potentially a non-issue is a serious escalation.

[@tonichan89]

lol my mom did several times for one or several hours :'D I was scared shitless cus I didn't know she was at the neighbors

[@snoox27]

@@GabriellaT21 they were behind a closed door. If she had said "I need a walk ill brb" totally different situation. The producer doesn't count. 4 year olds can do alot of stupid shit in a very shirt space of time. Dont invite danger into your home.

[@snoox27]

@@tonichan89 my daughter has anxiety (as do i) we all (dad included) make sure we communicate well about where we're going what we're doing and when we'll be back. All three of us always say "i love you" before bed, leaving each other.

[@jenrutherford6690]

The child isn't alone . Their are people in the house .

[@Meofalulu]

"Belay" is what what the person holding the ropes does when they're helping a rock climber

[@naomikeenan951]

She’s been quarantining in Morocco but living alone. May is not with her.

[@R4di0Tr4sh]

@@karolinag6321 she's posted about her daughter being with her mom the whole quarantine.

[@esmiq7771]

Also came out Azan married with kids lmao

[@Andorski]

I thought she already came back.

[@esmiq7771]

@@Andorski shes been back.

[@Andorski]

@@esmiq7771 originally she left because Morocco was throwing out everyone who wasn't a citizen, right? I think that was around September. Did she go back after that?

[@djsoleil78]

The explanation of sitting with ambiguity was so helpful!

[@liz_suh]

I spot a Depeche Mode LP in the background. Dr. Kirk is so cool. Depeche Mode (early DM is one of my favorite bands). All their stuff up to Violator.

[@cecilewhite1897]

I didn't notice that. DM is my favorite band!

[@cecilewhite1897]

It's Catching Up With Depeche Mode.

[@liz_suh]

@@cecilewhite1897 I have a VHS with the same cover and it’s of all their singles & music videos.

[@renardealors3192]

And Journey's Escape!

[@minaermelyn]

Didn't one of the weddings not go through because Nicole didn't have the paperwork? So Azan really "only" cancelled one wedding. Or am I remembering that wrong?

[@TheSaiyanPrincess89]

Yes and no. The paperwork she needed wasn't there so they couldn't officially and legally get married, however money had already been poured into the ceremony and reception, so cancelling that was just an excuse on Azan's part. They still could have had the actual wedding and waited some months to be able to officially file the paperwork. Does that make sense? So while they wouldn't have been able to be recognized by the Moroccan government as legally bound by marriage from the first wedding, there was no reason to actually cancel it unless Azan did in fact not want to get married to her. They wasted a ton of money both times Azan cancelled the wedding.

[@minaermelyn]

@@TheSaiyanPrincess89 that makes sense, and was also something I thought when that issue came up - just have the ceremony and do the legal stuff later! I don't know what "side" I am on, imo they are just not compatible and not ready for marriage. Both of them need to figure their lives out and grow up first.

[@deelaljee7138]

Azan was taken aback by her size. That is why he did not go through with the first wedding, I am speculating. The ceremony could have taken place. In fact if it did, the pictures might have assisted in expediting his Visa.

[@abigailtrumbo178]

@@TheSaiyanPrincess89 In Morocco, though, you cannot go ANYWHERE together without proof of legal marriage. I wanted to visit with my husband, with whom I had the Islamic marriage first because our faith is most important, but we couldn't even do that despite our signed contract and certificate from the mosque. It has to be specifically government paperwork. So even trying to do a faith marriage would have put Azan and potentially her into danger.

[@jessgillis4103]

I'm really curious about this "evidence" that he loves her. Fat-shaming her, refusing to share a bed, recoiling from her touch... He says he loves her, but I've never seen him show it other than maybe some hand holding.

[@ironzombi]

About 50%...zero evidence Azan is in love with her, I was confused where that statement came from also. I mean are we watching the same clips 😂

[@kokolatte825]

I'm sorry? Did you expect him to share a bed with her in his mom's house or anty's house? And please with the "fat shaming". Other cultures don't pussyfoot around people being obese. I really think he tried to not be rude because she's just big, a little bit.

[@deelaljee7138]

It's not accepted in their culture or religion to be sharing a bed prior to marriage or being physically close in public. He explained that to her, so did the mother and aunt. Public display of affection between a man and woman is not accepted in Muslim countries. He has no choice but to follow the rules.

[@trinejensen1707]

Dr. Honda ending a video Me; NO, DON’T GO!!! 😭

[@katpillar4131]

Pay close attention to the phone call she has with Azan in a future episode where she has to prompt him about that "thing/family emergency" that kept him from going to Grenada...you can hear the lie in her voice. I hope Nicole has finally learned to only buy refundable plane tickets in the future.

[@trinejensen1707]

And Nicole lets May sit alone and paint, while she is in lala-land facetiming with azan 🙈

[@trinejensen1707]

She was lucky that the camera-crew was there to keep an eye on May, it would be horrible if someone bad came and took May while Nicole was deeply distracted by talking to azan 👀🙈

[@trinejensen1707]

And when she asked him how it was going with the family-crisis, he was quiet for a while, as if he didn’t rember that he had said he had that 👀

[@kristinbagani2811]

Has anyone noticed that Azan has the tendency to cancel plans at the last minute? He did this with both the weddings and the trip to Grenada. I can’t help wonder why he keeps doing this. Is this a result of his supposed arrested development, or is he doing this as a form of passive-aggression against Nicole and her family for some hidden reason? What do you think?

[@marisapetrucelli5574]

Passive agression. Revenge.

[@colleenbogovich5435]

She is a liar but not just to get family and strangers, she lies to herself.

[@Jinxi928]

I get what Dr. Honda is saying about ambiguity. However.. can't we all just agree that with the data we have about Azan and Nicole it is clear he is a scammer? I mean yes, never judge someone too early, but how much data we need for something that obvious?

[@gorefieldluvr6921]

Hi Honda! Youre posting a lot lately, remember to take a break if you need to!

[@Anmorataeah]

I think that she fully knows everything. She knows what he used the money for and the real reason they cancelled the wedding and what's actually happening with this "family emergency". She just has to cover for him in front of the family and cameras because they can't know the truth--they'd think she's even more incompetent. That's why she always seems so calm when these things happen, because she knows the truth and knows it's bad but doesn't care. I don't think it's just him telling her these things and her believing it, they probably figure out what to tell her family together. Not saying Azan is necessarily abusive, but I've been in 3 physically and/or emotionally abusive relationships in my life (yes I'm in therapy now), and I would always try to downplay things as much as possible to my family. I fully knew all the terrible things that were happening but I couldn't let my family know, because they'd think I was crazy for staying. Even when my most recent bf (who reminds me of Azan right down to the accent so it's a bit triggering to watch these) cheated with multiple women, including my best friend and was all around an abusive, gaslighting, terrible human, my cover was: "mom I'm just upset because I found out another woman flirted with him" (as he yelled at me for letting my mom see me cry at all because it "makes him look bad"). It's much too traumatic to admit the truth that the person you love doesn't exist and doesn't love you like you wanted, so you just stay in fantasy-land.

[@mrodgers3910]

Yes! I think that this is why it's so important to support people without judgement until they are ready to leave. I'm glad you're in a better place now:)

[@ImaginaryMdA]

I believe we've seen a change in Azan. And I can't help but feel it's because of the way Nicole and her family have treated him.

[@crystalhogan3834]

He was working when she first meet him but she told him to quit his job so she could talk to him whenever she wanted to SMH 😡

[@naomikeenan951]

I believe that you’re thinking of Angela and Michael.

[@jeanp1323]

Angela did the same to Michael. Some women are very controlling

[@vellabella1]

She probably made a deal saying I will pay you , if you stop working

[@sdg2450]

Yeah it's brought up in one of the earlier episodes that he quit his job because Nicole was upset she could talk with him while he was at work so she told him to quit his job and started sending him money.

[@ilikealison]

i'm definitely living for nicole/azan + colt/larissa reacts the same day lol

[@duhastkeinhertz]

Dr. Kirk has a Depeche mode - "catching up with" vinyl on the shelf!! Great album!!

[@thepolarbearsarelife]

Lol doctor Honda being scared of the text screen 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@tehdemoness]

I feel like this is a situation of, if he loves you, you'll know it. if there are mixed signals/questions, then he doesn't. or at the very least you deserve to be with someone who can be dependable and love you wholeheartedly. even if i know my partner truly loves me, i'd still be furious if they were so irresponsible as to keep cancelling plans like this, especially as it affects my family and others. even if it might not be reflective of their love, its still reflective of how they handle their business and follow thru on their word and those are important attributes in a partner

[@van5754]

Can we just talk about how charming Dr Honda is when he talks about using a word wrong 🥺

[@habeashumor9814]

Yesterday there was only one “really” in the sign-off instead of the usual two, and I was like “oh no he’s mad at us!” 🙀

[@colombi1anjay]

Poor Kirk got mortified. But I learned two new words.

[@kmonkey8874]

lmao may laying on the floor

[@trinejensen1707]

Yeah, she couldn’t care less 😂

[@kristinbagani2811]

I’m thinking May has learned to tune out Nicole and her drama in order for May to be content with her own life.

[@jke387]

I love when Dr. Honda has awkward moments in his videos...thumbs up!

[@KarenSmallwood]

Are his “things to do” his wife and children? I think something like that is going on and Nicole accepts that but is afraid of her family’s reaction.

[@meganwoehl5277]

The emergency was his wife giving birth to their 3rd child.

[@KarenSmallwood]

@@meganwoehl5277 Is that what's happening?

[@meganwoehl5277]

@@KarenSmallwood it's been a moment since I read updates, but yeah the rumors are that Granada was canceled when his wife went into labor. Nicole then learned that his wife and him were still together even though she had given him the 6,000 to pay for the divorce, so she booked a surprise trip to Morroco to confront him and got stranded there during quarantine, forced to quarantine on her own in Morroco without May. Idk. It's all rumor but honestly if any couple could be so deceitful, it would be them. Can't even keep up with all the lies.

[@KarenSmallwood]

@@meganwoehl5277 That's awful for her daughter. It makes sense as there is something so dishonest about how Azan carries on.. and his mother calls him Hassan when she speaks Arabic I feel so badly for any woman who has to deal with that kind of deceit from him.

[@theherbivorelife5743]

I suspect he's got someone in Morocco and he is just using Nicole as a cash cow. Poor Mae in all of this, her mom really needs to get her act together.

[@lindag.9069]

Anyone remember how Azan's ticket was purchased? Did she give him money, or actually purchase the ticket for him (instead of sending him the money)? I feel like that was a minor discussion. And I remember kind of... turning against Azan and starting to believe he was just in it for the money at that point.

[@yuukimasamura5143]

Azan got in too deep. She basically forced this relationship on him all just to prove her mother wrong.

[@stacieicats]

Love the hand motions in describing Nicole’s dad’s chin decoration

[@necoragha65]

Haha, chin decoration, must remember that.

[@cecilewhite1897]

The rumor was that his cousin "wife" was giving birth to his third child and that's why he couldn't make the trip.

[@katpillar4131]

Methinks that $6k is Azan's cut of the 90 Day pay that Nicole got for filming.

[@ashalvarez5287]

@Itsjusta Hemi Marrying cousins in NOT normal

[@ashalvarez5287]

@Itsjusta Hemi you better look up the birth defects that come with it .

[@robinnilsson9487]

@Itsjusta Hemi people use "normal" to mean "okay". Just because something is normal or not, doesn't mean it is good or bad. We can say for certain that cousin marriage is bad for child-making. But it serves a cultural purpose, and it benefits their society in other ways.

[@ashalvarez5287]

@Itsjusta Hemi I literally just saw a documentary on Royal family that married cousins and the birth defects they had and there children .

[@litarivera-cortes146]

We don’t care if you use the wrong word sometimes! We know you’re smart as crap. That’s why we like you because you’re so human and relatable AND smart as crap. Totally get how it mortifies you though because I’ve done similar. True story: On one of my dating profiles this guy messages me to let me know in my “about me” section I spelled sapiophile wrong. Sapiophile!😱 Of all words. I swear I know how to spell that word but thanks to autocorrect and poor editing...so yeah. Talk about mortified. You would have thought I killed a puppy

[@mrsa6925]

I’m a sapiophile too! 😊 I discovered that years ago.

[@HokieJuju]

I had to laugh when u were talking about the whole belay and allay thing. I feel the same way when I use a word the wrong way. It's probably not a big deal to 98% of the world, but I'm humiliated by it!! I'm such a word & grammar freak!! Lol!! Where does that come from?? I've always thought mine comes from having a mother who was an English major in college and was a writer, but who knows?? It's funny to see someone else have the same reaction I would!!! I enjoy your videos. I had an idea of something that would be really interesting for u to analyze, but I'm not sure if u would be interested as it's kind of a hot topic these days. I think it's something that is important and would help people gain some much needed understanding. It would be to analyze some interactions between police officers and a perpetrator. Maybe do some where things go bad and do some where everything is peaceful and ends well. You could look at some cases where mental health is an issue and cases where it's not. I feel like people don't really have a good understanding of what police officers go through sometimes and how stressful that situation can be as they are going into these situations blind and not knowing if someone may have a weapon or not. I also feel like some officers don't have a clue how stressful the situation of getting arrested or detained can be for some people, especially people with mental issues or who have something else going on like autism. And then if u bring in the 3rd group of people, which could be witnesses or family members or anyone else who is on the scene at the time. It's very stressful for them as well. It would be really cool to see an unbiased view of the situation from a psychologist who could relay what is happening at the time, what people on all sides might be feeling, and how to best respond for a peaceful end for everyone. People that are going to be punks or thugs regardless of the situation aren't going to watch or get anything out of it b/c they have no desire to change, but it might help everyone else who actually cares about having peaceful endings to very stressful situations. I really wish the show Live PD was still on b/c that would be a perfect situation where u could do a commentary as the situations would happen live. It might be best to stay away from analyzing the well known cases we've had recently (at least initially) b/c people are so impassioned about them and have their mind made up one way or the other and are set in what they think on those cases. Anyway, figured I'd throw that out to u as I think it would be great to see u do some cases like that and offer unbiased viewpoints from a psychology perspective!!!! Thanks!!

[@JLynnEchelon]

I have this running hypothesis that Azan has been trying his hardest to get Nicole to break up with him. I don't think it's to look like the good guy (unless he's REALLY bad at it), but the only way Nicole will let him go for real is if it seems like the breakup wad her idea.

[@sharon7968]

"There's a 'chance' he's scamming" - I love your optimism Dr Kirk :)

[@LB-gz3ke]

She says once they are married they will support each other and be there for each other. Foolish child, if he isn't there for you and being dependable now he isn't magically going to be dependable with a ring on his finger.

[@Te3time]

This is what gives me trust issues bc basically my parents would often (especially when I was younger) tell me things that never ended up happening

[@jmorphiscave]

Rewatching 8-4-22, auto scroll popped up reruns and it’s still interesting reactions from Dr K.

[@lynnmothibeli325]

Lol it's okay to make mistakes Dr. Kirk❤😂. You're just human.

[@shawnmercercrain9727]

Nicole needs to get some guts. A) ditch Azan for good b) get away from her toxic mother and family!

[@Set5087]

Dr. Honda...don't worry about getting words mixed up...you're human too! 😊👍

[@jeanp1323]

Installment #42 ? Wow i forgot she had been on this show so many times

[@alainahouser8715]

No offense but I don't support the notion of accepting ambiguity in some situations when details can be made clear. If I gave my partner $6K to open a store and then they didn't, I want to know where that money is right now. Did they spend it or is it still in their bank account? It's simple. If I have to dive through their fluff of words to figure out the answer and I still don't have one, then they're not trustworthy to me. In a lot of situations, Azan spares critical details and I don't understand why. Even with this Grenada trip; what emergency or dire situation stopped him from going? Because if you already spent money on an expensive ticket and you don't have a job, I'm going to assume something big had to happened to delay traveling. But why can't he tell her the deets? Perhaps he did but Nicole didn't want to say it on camera for privacy reason but I doubt it. Whew, couldn't be me on TV showing the world my relationship; I would not be able to handle it.

[@shareekah1]

So what about the rumor of him already being married? Does anyone know more about that?

[@wendymaree]

All relationship scams I've seen on other channels, and through real life stories published in books, follow a similar pattern to this. When there's little time shared, and the man seems unwilling to spend much or any time with the woman, AND money has been requested, it is always a scam.

[@Carla47156]

Yesterday Alan contacted Nicole and ask her to send him money. He ask if she could send him a thousand dollars. He told him she didn’t have the money. He just said good bye. Then they hung up. I wonder if that is why de cancelled the trip. He has tried to get visas into other countries and was denied. If I was in her position I would not be able to trust him. I like dealing with facts. My work for the years I worked was accounting, Human Resources and payroll. I have to be able to know the truth or have complete trust. My husband and I have never been with anyone else. I have never cheated and I totally believe he hasn’t cheated. He and I have sound morals that we rely on to help us direct our lives. We’re both from sound faithful families and I would be devastated if I cheated. I’ve been attracted to men before but never considered cheating. I so appreciate your caring heart and genuine concern for the welfare of others.

[@AisforApple1346]

Fun fact y’all. Nicole’s dad has been in and out of prison her whole life. Drugs I think.

[@liliansalinas9030]

Please Dr. Honda, I belay you, do some Teen Mom or Teen Mom 2 episodes next! 😍

[@TheDani5924]

i was in a relationship similar a few years back, it was long distance (not quite overseas distant but certainly a good 70 miles) my partner although very loving and caring never visited me, i only ever visited him. one day i confronted him and I said "look if we're going to have a future there has to be a give and take i mean if we're to get married i cant expect my family to make a 70 mile trip, if i move it's going to be a long way and he was similar to azan in that he didnt work. once i realised he didnt care about making the effort i was then I called it quits. im all for love but it's takes two people.

[@dee...]

I don't know if you'll see this, Dr Kirk, but I just wanted to remind you that it's ok to make mistakes. You're a professor AND you're also human. I'm certain that anyone with any shred of empathy and compassion will find it endearing and also comforting to know you're imperfect in these small ways. If it makes you feel any better: I know how to pronounce Socrates, but when I was a student at University, in front of a tutorial group, I pronounced it "So-Crates". I was so nervous having to talk in front of everyone I somehow reverted back to Bill and Ted's pronunciation. 😂😂😂

[@evanz2704]

Woah woah, easy there, Dr. Kirk! I can only watch so many new uploads in one day!

[@cloudsfluff5505]

Both of you are right on point and they should be aware of his activity

[@Lilyrose23]

If you go on any meeting/dating site you’ll be flooded with North African men trying to date you and marry you, they all are looking for visa and if they can’t a sugar mama😂. Some of them might fall in love and be genuine but I personally wouldn’t believe a man that asks you to marry him after 2 weeks of chatting. Which is what Azan did.

[@jamilar9229]

one correction though - the first time the wedding was cancelled was bc of a mistake the Nicole made regarding her own papers (she brought copies instead of original files).

[@dianastella]

Yes, there are faster ways to scam, but none of them provide a sustained income... Just saying.

[@dorahomanyi3994]

It must be really hard to be in front of cameras for years, and live with the knowledge everyone is forming an opinion about you. Not even mentioning how hard it might be to admit you made a giant mistake. Admitting you are the one to blame for many things is always hard. I seriously think Azan used to have good intentions then she hurt him both physically and emotionally, and he just realised he doesn’t want anything from her, but like free money is free money. It is so sad to see her reaction, obviously she was sad not to go to Granada, but I think she meant it when she said she is not completely disappointed that he cancelled it. It seems like she knows what is actually going on, even though she is denying it. I think they are just simply toxic for each other.

[@angelyrighetti284]

Doctor Kirk, you made my day ✨

[@Jennifer_Lewis_Beach_Living]

No worries about using the wrong words, Dr. Honda - it happens. 😊 I know that some parts of 90-Day Fiancé is a “work” to increase drama, so my comments are based on what’s shown on the screen. I don’t think Azan is the typical “scammer” where the original intention was to rob Nicole. I think he was interested in Nicole at first, but when he saw that she misled him on a few things (including her appearance and maturity level), his interest waned. However, because he’s easily getting something out of the relationship (money), he keeps her around and will continue to do so until a better option comes along and/or she can no longer give him any money. As for Nicole, she’s like the teenage girl who keeps dating a guy because her parents don’t like him and she wants to prove them wrong. She may be in denial regarding Azan’s intentions, but based on her body language, I think she knows that Azan is using her as a sugar mama and doesn’t want to be with her, but she stays with him because she doesn’t want her parents to see that they were right.

[@melyssarevilla1468]

I wonder if she has a lot of doubts and fears and feels like crap but can't express it because she knows she will not get empathy from her family but judgment and she will be mocked by them if she expresses her feelings of pain. When I was younger, my mom used to mock me for crying whenever I felt emotional pain, so I always hide those feelings. Up to this day, although I love her deeply, I don't show weakness around her because I don't trust she will comfort me but make everything worse. I think Nicole feels that way and it sucks to not be able to feel emotionally safe with your own family

[@lkiyia]

ok double comment, sorry for that but I am really actually about to scream at my screen " SOME OF US HAVEN'T SEEN THE SHOW, STOP ASSUMING IT PLEASE". Will still be subscribed and follow of the videos with love :D.

[@You-sw7tm]

Hey Dr. Kirk, can you do analysis on couples from the show Marrying Millions? Specifically couples with a large age gap like Rick and Erica, and Bill and Brianna.

[@shahrzadtajmiri3138]

Thanks Dr. Honda for your great insight into the psychology of each person involved. Will you please elaborate on how come Nicole is stuck with this guy who consistently disappoints him? I like to understand what is happening for her in her psyche!

[@jackielehman8945]

Hi Dr. Kirk! Im in school for social work :-) Could you comment on the power dynamics in these couples? Especially in regard to holding green cards above peoples head? Thanks! Love the show :-)

[@SatanSpawn801]

I honestly think that if he were to be in the United States he would want nothing to do with Nicole

[@kitsunegao]

El dr Kirk es adorable, es mi favorito, siempre veo sus videos y escucho su podcast

[@inubakablog]

Azan is like my dad. My dad likes to be kept. He spent 18 yrs doing this to various women kept strategically separate. He married the most recent one, she had the mo$t to offer and he had more to lose. Good luck, Nicole. You can't get this time back once it's gone.

[@lindsay9838]

I forgot about these two…wonder if Dr. Honda heard about Nicole traveling to Morocco at the beginning of covid and getting “stuck” there for 5 months (the truth being she was NOT stuck and people even offered to pay her flight home so she could come be a mother to Mae again since Mae was left in the states and she denied every offer and pretended she HAD to stay)

[@everydayoilmommies5091]

Wow. Poor Nicole. She is young and seems to have a long future ahead of her. I’m twice her age and would not feel I had time to waste on this pattern. I do wish her the best happiness

[@Peanut_taco_muffin]

Lol don’t all 22 year olds seem to have a long future ahead of them?

[@nurawright7521]

Dr. kirk instead of watching Smothered, I think you should watch the show TLC just released about mothers that are extremely close to their sons (i can’t remember the name). But the mothers in the show, display much more concerning behavior than those on smothered. Their behavior is extremely concerning.

[@aishavocal]

Most evidence is circumstantial, especially when it comes to intent. Per the ABA "[direct and circumstantial] evidence can be offered in oral testimony of witnesses or physical exhibits, including fingerprints, test results, and documents. Neither kind of evidence is more valuable than the other." That said, the circumstantial evidence doesn't quite point to fraud as we have seen (we don't have all the info) BUT, what Azan is doing is definitely indicative of someone who doesn't give a shit about his responsibilities and is willing to take advantage of people.