A Survivor Story: Marilyn Van Derbur

Marilyn shares her story of child sexual abuse, to provide a deeper understanding of the experience of survivors.
Together, we can protect children from sexual abuse. To learn how you can help us keep kids safe, visit our website at www.D2L.org/get-trained.

[@lisajones2533]

I was sexually abused from 3 to 19 I still can’t have a normal relationship. I cannot be around my Parents or siblings, I did finally find my voice, and tell. Everyone was so protective of my parents. I was bullied . I stay to myself all the time, even around people, the comfort I have is closing my eyes and going within myself. No one around me understands , now that I’m 55 evevyone says just get over it. So I’m the only one who really cares and loves me

[@abutterfly7975]

I understand so much.....

[@jfranco1300]

God can bring you healing and deliverence.and Joy of the Lord to you.call on him in the name of Jesus! Praying youll be set free....

[@jeffthompson6451]

Jesus loves you

[@froandcara]

❤️

[@PotterSpurn1]

I suffered an abusive childhood from two narcissistic parents. My brother too was / is a narcissist. I was the family scapegoat. The destruction their emotional and psychological abuse had on me: especially the invalidation, the belittling, the glaring favouritism toward my brother, knowing that I could not talk to either parent, knowing my father (or mother) never wanted me to be happy or successful, their sadistic tendencies too permeated every core of my being and I have ended up alone, too scared and unwilling to commit to a relationship with anyone knowing full well that what I am inside may put a potential partner off. So I have never married or had kids or ever had a wonderful home filled with people and happiness. I've lived alone all my life struggling with it for a long while, trying to find a route cause and the correct label that explained their behaviours and and just trying to cope with it all. I wouldn't have even got as far as I had if I had not become a Christian, so that is one silver lining. The economic impacts have been just as hard too - anger stopped me being able to mix well or hold down a job earlier in life - and the whole abuse continued into my parents death when they disinherited me for ever trying to escape the abuse and make a life for myself, which they clearly did not want for me. Not allowing myself to be in the firing line of their direct face to face abuse was reason enough to abuse me more in my absence- so it seemed. When they died (no one bothered telling me they had died, I just found out) I never mourned either one of them. Never shed one tear. Never attended their funerals. I have no idea where either one of them is buried. Neither parent had bothered explaining, apologising for the abuse and by leaving their entire estate to my brother they wanted to leave this world ensuring that I did not have a brother either. The money and unfairness would cause an obvious divide that was impossible to mend. I can't tell you what it is like knowing that your family doesn't just not love you but also wants to go out of their way to make that clear to you from the time you were young until the day they die and beyond. It's almost impossible to see yourself as a loveable, normal human being when there are so many tangible reasons to think otherwise. The legacy of the hurt and pain they caused is total introversion, an unwillingness to trust, a desire to just not bother to socialise after attracting a whole lot of other exploitative narcissistic types into my life. Being an abuse victim makes you an obvious target for more of the same. So I tend to avoid people now. Most of the time it is OK, but at Birthdays and Christmas it is painful to be alone. The bible says that I should love my persecutors but not their behaviour. They know not what they do. I haven't got to that stage yet. So I feel like a failure as a Christian too. But I do know that God loves me. That I am sure of. He has blessed me in so many ways and I have sensed his presence from early childhood. I am certain he sent an angel to look out for me. The destruction that child abuse can cause is mind-blowing. No one, who has never experienced it, could possibly understand it. Emotional abuse is often harder to deal with because no one believes it's as bad as physical or sexual abuse. But it is. The impacts are just as devastating.

[@pattyoneill6724]

The part where she says her husband never betrayed her, oh she deserves that love, is a sweet woman.

[@sallyann985]

Truth be told she got very lucky outside of the abuse situation. Most people don't have the kinds of blessings that she has.

[@fritula6200]

Laura...in reply: You're missing her story: listen to her daily pain: it's because she was wealthy that she was able to reach you & me and HELP millions of INCEST VICTIMS:

[@annakoshi4774]

What horrifies me is that her mother did not support her. That is the ultimate rejection!

[@333-u9o]

Women often look the other way or just won't accept it even if the child finally opens up to her - because it's more important not to lose the man and to be alone. It's sickening! So many men (and also women) get away with their crimes forever.

[@TheRetroWoman80]

One of THEE most disgusting and unforgivable ways a parent can behave towards their child😡

[@sweetrose813]

I know but these women seem to be blinded by the shame of it so they'd rather live in a fantasy world a plastic world that's fake and sacrifice their daughters to the lust of their husband that man needs to be locked up instead of covering his sins

[@Thatsbannanas-d8c]

Its called a betrayal.

[@oneday455]

She was so articulate, and able to identify all the pitfalls of internalizing the shame. What a great spokesperson for survivors!

[@VioletJoy]

Absolutely!

[@cornelj.]

Nope! If she spoke up sooner she could've prevented her dad from hurting others. She doesn't deserve praise.

[@minniemouse8686]

@@cornelj. You may need to learn to listen better...ignorance is quite ugly when spoken in arrogance.

[@cornelj.]

@@minniemouse8686 explain your argument please?

[@annamfkelly]

Easy for you to blame the victim! Do you do this often in your life? Are you that harsh on yourself? Where is this coming from?

[@cwhyharris7473]

My baby sister was a survivor at the hands of an older sisters husband. From the age of 5 to 14. She passed recently at 53yrs of diabetes complications. When we hold our hurts inside it destroys our body. I so miss her.

[@TheRetroWoman80]

Hugs💚 so sorry for what she went through and that COVID messed with her too. Please keep the bright memories of her close to your mind and heart.

[@barbryll8596]

Even imagining a father getting sexual gratification from his own daughter makes my stomach turn !!!! Marilyn you are a very brave, beautiful woman! Thankyou for helping people see the bigger picture.

[@milkandhoney9849]

barb ryll so painful

[@jameseverett9037]

And it's those kind of guys who will always have women who are committed to them, while a million "nice" guys won't.

[@KDL861]

barb ryll Does it make you wonder what happened to her parents as children?

[@dancingnature]

Trauma bonds

[@DorothyGTyas]

It makes me want to cry.... and rage for all children who are abused by sexual predators. What an absolute unmitigated nightmare of a horror show.

[@pattim173]

I grew up in an incestuous family. These men believed it was ok to victimize the women in the family yet they held shame. Hid what they were doing, knowing very well it was wrong. I was beaten for going to a therapist because he (my idiot father) thought I was telling them what he did. I did. My mother, who suffered from tremendous low self esteem, allowed it. She was complicit and I blamed her for not protecting my sister and I. My marriages could never flourish because of the abuse. I could never wear a bathing suit, and to this day I still lock the bathroom door while using it. Through life I would never allow my children to know her or my father.

[@samch656]

All my prayers for you sister 🙏 clay God bless you Ameen

[@catherinehenry6762]

why is it that mothers so often deny what is happening when their children tell them about the abuse. They go so far as calling their child a liar. I've heard of it happening so many times, once in my own family. Why this , almost universal, denial? Is it just too awful to even consider, or too socially unacceptable, is the hurt too deep that you could betray your own child and make her (him) feel even more isolated?

[@GEENIAH3]

Im so sorry 😕

[@debraethan8920]

@@catherinehenry6762 I think mothers deny because it would hurt too much & be too much of an upheaval to accept or believe the truth. The mothers find it easier to bury their head in the sand & look the other way. My sis was abused at 7 repeatedly. She was told never to tell because it was her fault. She started wetting the bed at 7. When she got her period at 12, she finally told. My mother said she must've enticed her abuser (who was our cousin, my mother's brother's son, 15 at the time of the abuse). My mother blamed my sister because otherwise my dad would have to know & my mother always held her family up as superior to my dad's family. So mothers have all kinds of reasons for their denial. When my sis would wet the bed, seems my mother would have to wonder why all of a sudden. Could it possibly have something to do with the fact that this cousin was babysitting us while she & my dad worked? Instead she'd wash my sister's face in those urine soaked sheets to teach her a lesson. We were frequently treated like animals. I divorced myself from my mother as a young woman because I could see the kind of person she was. God help all children who have a "mother" like this.

[@lindsays2007]

@@debraethan8920 oh my. I’m sorry you and your sis went through this. Unbelievable. I’ve never heard of a mother rubbing her child’s face in their urinated sheets (though I know it’s undoubtedly happened bc parents can be cruel). Truly, you both have my respect. If you don’t mind me asking: about how long ago did the abuse start? I’m just curious when it took place. ❤❤

[@rickruthstrom222]

At one of the darkest points in my life, Marilyn revealed what had happened in her life. My mind was screaming, “No, not Miss America too!” I was violated by several perpetrators as a child. In 1991, my three-year old very clearly told me what had happened to him and who did it. That finally launched me into my own recovery over 30 years after first being violated. My acquaintance with Marilyn began then. Miss Colorado before becoming Miss America was living in Denver. I have lived in Colorado since 1979. I was able to participate with groups Marilyn was a part of. However, the best memory of that time was the two-plus-inch thick file of personal correspondence between myself and Marilyn. Her very personal efforts to support my recovery were stellar.

[@adriennep.5004]

She is a stunningly beautiful woman....more beautiful than when she was young and she tells her story with such grace and class and honesty.

[@ummiramli6554]

That's what I thought striked me when I first scrolled down ! Amazing beauty.

[@schoomzer]

Adrienne P. Yes, stunningly beautiful then and now, but not more beautiful now than when she was younger.

[@terenoy]

schoomzer I’m guessing it’s the depth of positive feelings that shine through.

[@ladennayoung2939]

She is pretty period. When she was younger. She was pretty, and at an older age. She is pretty.

[@reneecarter4505]

I'm not sure when this interview was made but she is 82 years old now and still beautiful. So glad she chose to share her story, may she continuously help others.

[@lauriesoper4056]

"It's never too late to be a mother." This is a profound and compelling statement from someone who never had one.

[@deboraholsen2504]

Laurie Soper After all that, this remarkable woman was willing to forgive her mother! But her mom was too much of a narcissistic coward!

[@malola100]

it is .... defenetly

[@marycanfield8654]

She waited for a demonstration from her mother that her mother loved her and even up until the day she died her mother wouldn't do it, she wouldn't give her the love, she needed.

[@Ida-Adriana]

I need a mother

[@ellieaquitaine6396]

This story is so tragic. She was betrayed by both her parents. What an amazing lady.

[@Tameasa]

I heard Marilyn Van Derbur tell her story when I was a young woman in my 20s. She helped me to find the courage to speak.

[@jrg4313]

Tameasa Provencher Very sad to hear that this happened to you. It is heartbreaking. I was not sexually abused.....I was verbally, emotionally and physically abused..... beaten, hit, ridiculed, ignored, teased, put down, yelled at, etc. by my father, and the other siblings were encouraged to do the same. My mother looked the other way. I have been in therapy 40 years and counting.

[@sharongill9837]

@@jrg4313 😢😢😢😢😢

[@sallymander7863]

Tameasa, JR G, I don't know what to say to you both to comfort you, all I can do is hope you find the happiness you both deserve, sending you love and hope, bless you both ❤️❤️

[@jrg4313]

@@sallymander7863 Thank you! I was fortunate not to be sexually abused. I can sort of forgive my mother because she had a he-ll of a hard life growing up. Her brothers were abusive to their children. I don't know where my father's anger and mental health issues came from. His parents were not abusive in any way, and his siblings were not abusive to their children in any way. Many many others have been through worse and too many to this day go through horrible abuse. People who abuse defenseless children, elderly, handicap and animals are evil vile scum. God Bless you 🙏!

[@Catalystresource]

As a therapist and an incest survivor myself, her description of dissociation and the abandoned inner child that she needed to rescue is so perfect! It is everyone's recovery journey and eventually it will manifest into physical symptoms to get our attention, which ultimately is a blessing.

[@fritula6200]

Correct!!

[@jeffreymiddlehurst4075]

What an eloquent, beautiful and strong woman....her story is inspiring.

[@gienbot7954]

I was about to say the exact same thing but you said it for me. Absolute elegance.

[@yvonnerahui8729]

And what the love of a good man can do..and to have his loving family embrace her. Love conquers. This is the love of God.

[@marilynwillett804]

only God has agape love, no human being.

[@lindor1695]

Rahui - The Bible teaches women and children are possessions of Men. There is no love there, only dominance and abuse.

[@paddlefar9175]

+Yvonne Rahui Where was your god when she was that scared, helpless little girl? Face it, your delusion isn't helping anyone. She did it on her own - she saved herself.

[@artbysonyabadgley]

This happened in my family as well. My father and my brother who was 10 years older than me. I have 4 other sisters and it happened to every one of us. All of us in some way ended up being damaged because of these horrible secrets. I was one of them that stood up to my brother and said I was going to tell if he touched me again. I ended up marrying 3 times to abusive men...thinking that's all I deserved. I went to counseling for years...and FINALLY, at the age of 40 I figured out that I did NOT have to have abuse of ANY kind in my life. And the way Marilyn had the split personality and acted out and had to be hospitalized was so much like what happened to my sister. These pedophiles need to be locked up permanently!

[@thcproductions477]

Hunny, I'm SO sorry this happened to you and your sisters. I hope you managed to find happiness, self worth and self love. So much evil out there... it makes me sick to my stomach. Love and light to you, always XOX

[@artbysonyabadgley]

@@thcproductions477 I did find happiness, self-worth, and self-love. Thank goodness! And yes, so much evil...it's so heartbreaking! God bless you for caring. xo

[@artbysonyabadgley]

@Monica Merino Yes, I do! And I'm so thankful for that! And He has delivered me, praise God. I just wish I could rescue all other victims.

[@rochelleahrotbard8866]

ABSOLUTELY

[@breezy3725]

No, they need swift justice. Anyone who harms an innocent child needs to be strung up until dead, period. There is no rehabilitation.

[@grizzlybear4]

"THEY NEVER STOP." Truest words ever. Damn them, and damn their enablers.

[@curiousgeorge6921]

That's Why Hell exists yet people call God evil for promising that

[@fabulousatfiftywilliams4177]

They don’t want to stop

[@cathyrenick8562]

NO, there's no cure for pedophilia and that is a fact. More than likely her father was also sexually abused. Sexual abuse incest is usually passed onto many generations in families. Her mother's denial as rejection seemed much harder to accept. Made me wonder if she herself split and was also sexually abused. Exactly, as she stated, How could her mother not know for 18 yrs. Very interesting how she was able to heal and finally get the validation she needed and found happiness.

[@cathyrenick8562]

@@curiousgeorge6921; Seriously, where in any Bible does it say hell exists? I'd really like to know. What I appreciate from her life's exoeriences. She was betrayed, rejected found true love and was later validated by her husband's family. Amazing child as a survivor of incest, betrayal of her father, and denial or rejection of her mother. Who may have herself been surviving abuse of incest. A truly remarkable woman as a survivor who was able to heal.❤ GOD BLESS ❤ALL SURVIVOR'S.

[@TheeQueenMidas]

Mary Riker Marilyn is exactly right-in the vast majority of cases-“They NEVER stop.” She said everything, in this interview, that I have always felt. Especially, when she says (not verbatim) “Even if there are some who are reformed, oils I trust my child around them? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Not even for 10 seconds.” I love her for that. She has expressed so much of my emotions, it’s surreal. Pray complete healing for each and every survivor.🙏🏾

[@myfriendisaac]

I hope she realizes how MAGNIFICENT she is for sharing this story. Wow 😭👏🏾💯

[@sOnlight67]

"He never betrayed me... I could trust him." I wish I could say those words.

[@dreamsofturtles1828]

She loved her father but he did not love her. No one who loves their child could do this .

[@malola100]

Her father is undoubtfully a psycopath... I read the first chapters of the book online and he was a tyrant with the whole family beginning with the heartless mother... He just cant love anyone

[@lynnklein6146]

He was a very sick man

[@alejandraalejandra4700]

Dreams, it's nothing about love in her father thats lust like animal's. Probably she was confused if she stayed in that house hold until 18...

[@alejandraalejandra4700]

Also victims are often feel like powerless, like paralise to move out or dream to start clean. BECAUSE they blame self first...

[@Farrah300]

Exactly my thoughts. If a parent loves his or her child, he or she would do everything possible to keep child safe, and NEVER HURT HIM OR HER.

[@karenkennedy6331]

I am from Denver, I remember you. We thought you lived a charmed life. Thanks for speaking out.

[@Farrah300]

Everything this lady touched turned to gold seemingly. Nobody knew of the horror she suffered.

[@dyawr]

Must be surreal hearing this story now, while also knowing her from afar back then.

[@ladennayoung2939]

Larry was literally Heaven sent.

[@Farrah300]

Marilyn found unconditional love. So many never do.

[@dyawr]

@Ladenna Young Exactly 👍 Amen

[@MimiB1974]

You never know what someone’s going through..... smiles hide a lot

[@blessedbeyondmeasures7532]

me af

[@texastea5686]

@@blessedbeyondmeasures7532 😔

[@chee-h1r]

Totally !!!!

[@bigjon-zx7ly]

Very true.

[@nildabridgeman8104]

MANY in life are clowns... Behind the makeup & costume are hidden tears

[@PureXLR8tion]

I feel so much rage when children are abused. If a father is abusing a child, and the mother is aware and doesn't do anything to stop him, she's just as guilty.

[@bettymobley763]

PureXLR8tion More guilty, Knowing and Doing Nothing is CONSENT.

[@lilycd6168]

PureXLR8tion the mom was probably happy the dad didn't bug her for sex..so She sacrificed her daughter...poor thing had to go to school and act normal.

[@parparpar5467]

100%!!!

[@grizzlybear4]

Her "mother" was an evil witch.

[@Karmen2010]

Probably because he's rich and and enjoyed the money. Basically she was pimping out her daughters. So disgraceful!

[@bigfoottreehugger12213]

In my opinion when your loved ones don’t acknowledge the abuse it hurts more than the abuse itself then the healing doesn’t know where to begin 😞

[@oliviacadena2036]

I really agree with you!!! 😰😰😰😞

[@oliviacadena2036]

👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍😍😍

[@oliviacadena2036]

Amen!! 👍👍👍😇😇😇

[@oliviacadena2036]

I agree with what you say!! 👍👍👍😇

[@oliviacadena2036]

👍👍😇👍😍😍😍

[@glasshalffull4061]

8:36 She hit the nail on the HEAD when she said, "We feel unlovable. We have to marry into relationships where we're not treated well, because we don't believe we deserve to be treated well." It's not because we want to be abused! It's not just the physical or sexual abuse, but the mental and emotional abuse as well. Children are in their formative years and predators know it and take complete advantage of that. They mentally and emotionally abuse children along with the sexual abuse in order to gain complete control. Unfortunately, even if the sexual abuse stops, the mental, spiritual and emotional effects last a lifetime. That's why it's SO IMPORTANT to participate in counseling, and if possible, involve those you trust implicitly. Doing this creates a Network of Support which is absolutely critical to healing. Marilyn, Thank You for being So BRAVE! Bless you. Bless you! BLESS YOU!!!

[@wandalester7253]

I am a surviver of multiple family incest. My skin crawled when my father touched me. I have a picture of my face splitting, one half is trying to smile, the other half in cringing. I was so afraid of my father finding out that he made my skin crawl. I am sixty-six years old and l'm still inside the coat of a foster mother, we are standing outside of her car, l am four years old. I was only with this foster mother for 24 hours. The hug she gave me as she tucked me into bed was the only hug l received as a child with love and security. I now know through counseling that it me that won't come out of her coat. The twenty-four hours l spent with Eleanor and that hug help me survive what came before and after that hug.

[@mariacardoza8093]

Your a true survivor

[@chynnhowe]

Wanda Lester I’m so sorry.

[@wandalester7253]

@@mariacardoza8093 thank you for your comment. God is so good, through Jesus, l was able to forgive my father and mother before they died. I will see them again someday. I hope you know the Saviour Jesus Christ. I have a wonderful relationship with Him through His Word! My favorite Ch. is John 17.

[@wandalester7253]

@@chynnhowe, thank you for your comment. I am still amazed how Jesus Christ has changed my life.

[@OneTrueWord1988]

Wanda Lester: Praying for you. 💕

[@susanduncan7875]

I have always thought that you were the classiest Miss America..when you came forward with your story I was stunned..Thank you for your courage. I too was sexually abused by a family member. I have finally have made peace with it and am now married to a wonderful amazing man. God Bless you now and always..

[@tiffanyclark-grove1989]

super classy

[@blissfulbaboon]

I agree.Marilyn is amazing for being courageously way ahead of her time in the MeToo movement!

[@hannahrosa5485]

My mother watched him molest me. I'm healed now. I'm whole now. I don't dissociate anymore. So glad you are well.

[@ummiramli6554]

Jnia. I hope you will have a more wonderful life. 💜

[@JenaEmerald]

Jnia Reepicheepcourage I’m sorry you went through that. Your comment makes me cry. How did you stop dissociating

[@MsAdventure531]

❤

[@romanromano4338]

""I will NEVER SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER AGAIN!' Oh, it was so validating." It's a shame to the family when it is other people who give you the kind of love and protection that you desperately need. A heart-wrenching story.

[@Farrah300]

Marilyn's father-in-law is nothing short of AWESOME~~~

[@TheRetroWoman80]

It is a terrible shame indeed. But thank goodness those other sweet spirits exist.

[@elainefarr3155]

I was privileged to watch Marilyn in person in the 90’s in Denver. I experienced similar early life and her story helped me start healing from my abuse. Thank you Marilyn for having the courage to share and help so many of us.

[@nickyceresney1045]

I saw her on the Phil Donohue show. Very brave!

[@taghazoutmoon5031]

Really, she's from Denver? I wish I met her

[@elainefarr3155]

@@taghazoutmoon5031 I think so, but she was speaking there at a conference. So wonderful

[@rickruthstrom222]

During her early years after her reveal in the 1990’s, I heard her speak a number of times. Twice we had face to face conversations. This guy cried SO MANY TEARS during recovery. I did not know that many tears could exist.

[@JasonX00]

18:26 "I believe she made a choice....and she didn't choose me." Heartbreaking words. I am so very sorry Marilyn. If it helps, I choose you. May God bless you.

[@blissfulbaboon]

Nice Maxi.I choose you too Marilyn ,for your strong, courageous and amazingly healthy spirit.You were way ahead of your times,ahead of the MeToo movement. What an inspiration and a true leader you are! Words cannot express my high regard and deepest respect for you Marilyn . Thank you for being you and bringing light,education and deeper understanding to what happens to the lives of victims of sexual preditors.

[@fpbsix]

yes , i agree , i have so much hurt , as i was brotherly abused from 4 to 14 when they gave the baby away .

[@janicemetzger6338]

That quote got me, too! Wow!

[@blondelebanese9922]

Faith Baillie I’m so sorry. Were you the baby or did you become pregnant from your abuse? Either would be terrible. I hope you’ve been able to be happy after being abused. I’m 68, and I’ve struggled with the abuse that was committed against me, for all these years. I’ve never told a single person, bc the shame was too great. I hope you’ve done better in your life than me. Sending loving thoughts and warm wishes your way. 🌸Annie

[@fpbsix]

@@blondelebanese9922 , no i had the baby from my abuse .

[@eileenmaschal9505]

She is a beautiful woman, how inspiring she is. How could a father destroy a child's innocence and trust. There is a special place in hell for people like him.

[@deboraholsen2504]

Eileen Maschal Her father basically threw away his evil stupid life. Jesus said it were better that a millstone were wrapped around his neck and he were thrown into the depths of the sea!

[@Farrah300]

The only father this dear lady had was her sweetheart of a father-in-law. I love she refers to him as ''Papa".

[@UnbornLivesMatter]

I'm sure her father is in hell, with so many others who have done this. Sad really... Hell does exist, and is for a very, very long time. But those who go there chose to do so, just as he did every time he molested a child. So happy that this beautiful woman found such a wonderful man & family! (They actually do exist.) May God bless her for all those she's helped!

[@upcycledwear]

Not to mention her mother.

[@lps1045]

“All I wanted was my father’s daytime love” A sad story but its a survivors story.

[@suestone6156]

She just explained the exact details of my life, except it wasn't my Father! I was threatened not to tell anyone! I was only five!!! As an adult I had to be perfect and succeed in everything, and I did! After 50+ years I choose to still remain alone, but I know now this stress is causing my severe health issues! Thank God I found this video. May God Bless her!

[@Hannahsangel]

There is something seriously wrong with the people who voted this video “down”

[@bettymobley763]

Harley Twink Who ever voted this video down may be Experiencing some dark in their life.

[@miriamllamas224]

Some people 👎 to show the hate for the subject, not that they don't like the video.

[@Karmen2010]

@@miriamllamas224 Exactly! I can't bring myself to upvote it because of what she endured. I also am unable to dislike it because she is an amazing and brave person. This is a story about strength and a horrible tragedy. People have the right to see which description outweighs the the other.

[@marysalvi242]

@@Karmen2010 Yes, it is hard to tell with this subject exactly what the up or down means...

[@suearmstrong9597]

The pedophiles voted it down my dear. Also women who knew it was happening to their child.

[@kathleengleason9805]

This woman is a national treasure when she first spoke up u never heard this on tv n so many people esp women suffer in silence

[@franceslock1662]

Kathleen Gleason the reasons women have been silent are; people don't believe you, people blame you, people feel uncomfortable and don't want to hear it, people are busy with their own lives and don't want to be bothered.

[@larrypierson8860]

Frances Lockhart o9ollp

[@diloo1861]

Talk about it dear people...Your suffering is OVER!! We KNÓW!!! We will wake up our sisters and brothers with the LOVE and LIGHT we áll have inside!!!

[@rebeccaaldrich3396]

You can't blame a child. Thank you for your story.

[@ThePHYL]

I had the pleasure of meeting Marilyn about 15 years ago, so inspiring, a few thousand people came to that seminar....and she stayed till every person who wanted a hug, or a picture....

[@mebhi2]

Teardrops were flowing for the wounded little girl still needing the love of a mother... she is one classy lady!

[@rebeccaskalare9445]

She’s incredibly lucky being able to have an intimate relationship and experience real love. Something, at the age of 60, I’ve not yet being able to do despite years and years of psychotherapy. I’m a survivor but a very wounded one. My highest dream is to experience mutual love with another human being.

[@dianalang3844]

Believe and have a relationship with Jesus!HEtruly is the lover of our souls!Bless you

[@rebeccaskalare9445]

@John Roe god bless you 🙏

[@TheRetroWoman80]

I still wish it for you and empathize deeply with your story 💚

[@idamay4590]

You deserve love and healing, Rebecca. I hope so dearly you have found it.

[@virginiawilkinson5038]

Trust GOD

[@seattlejayde]

“It’s never too late to be a Mother” .... profound

[@SweetUniverse]

Beautiful lady inside and out. There's a shining light in the darkness about her.

[@TheRetroWoman80]

Very well stated.

[@kathykent2167]

I remember her being crowned Miss America I’m so happy she is free. God will restore everything that was stollen from her and more. Thank you for being so brave and sharing your story 🌹

[@tinasteer2507]

kathy kent Where was your God When this was happening?

[@caitlinsoliman1658]

@@tinasteer2507 God gave human beings free will or else we would be automatons. This is a fallen world because of Adam and Eve eating the fruit of the knowledge of the tree of good and evil in the garden. Jesus is coming back to make a new heaven and a new earth but first the anti Christ is coming. If God reached down and stopped it every time someone did something evil then no one would have free will including you. Satan is actually ruling on this earth. God cast him down from heaven. It might be hard to understand but read the Bible and talk to a minister about it and pray for understanding.

[@heavenrivers8818]

@Ellis Freed 1958

[@jackmabel6067]

@@caitlinsoliman1658 : God doesn't have free will? God couldn't stop this madness?

[@TestTest-ft9xh]

@@caitlinsoliman1658 If God is more powerful then why would Satan rule the world? That is the paradox. If Gid could stop it, he would but he can't that is because God is you. You can't stop it until sometime in the future when you grow up and have power equal to Satan to unpack his bs and outsmart him. That's called being an adult. It is ok to take comforts in constructs of power & love like God and Jesus but eventually you must take your own power back on this earth & "shame the devil" so to speak. "You have to feel to heal". - Iyanla

[@melodyclark4347]

Both of my parents were physically abused as children. It was the second marriage for both of them. I can attest that children do not do as you say. They do as they see you do. When I was six, my mother spanked me, and I hid under the bed. When I finally came out she told me that from then on, she was letting my stepdad do the disciplining. She said that she was abused as a child, her siblings too. She told me she promised herself that she would never abuse her own children. She used her hand on your fanny, 2 or 3 little smacks, that we fake-cried over. He used a heavy leather embossed belt, and quit when he was tired. Yes you can block it out. From that day on, she never tried to intervene. She could be in the same room, and act like nothing happened. When I finally told a therapist, he slammed his fists down on his desk as he pushed his chair back, and said Melody your mother was insane. That was the day I let go of the guilt, wondering if it would have been different if I had not hid under the bed. Get help. Tell someone. If they don't help, tell someone else. If you suspect abuse, get involved. Knock down a door or two. Do not look the other way. This life has more than enough hardships. Abuse should never be tolerated. Blessings to every one.

[@Mary-cu6te]

I am sorry Melody. My aunt would just sit, or stand there and watch beatings. She would yell, you are going to kill him, but never anything was done about it. Makes one wonder? Glad at least you had a therapist who detested this insanity.

[@melodyclark4347]

@@Mary-cu6te God bless you sister. 💝

[@Mary-cu6te]

@@melodyclark4347 Hoping my late response doesn't interfere with your sleep, wherever you are. Hallmark PTSD, can't hardly sleep well without medications, which I detest, and sometimes unreliable. Thank you for your thoughtfulness and kindness. You as well, and sleep good, Mary

[@melodyclark4347]

@@Mary-cu6te I understand entirely. Some times I put on a good front, but it hangs in the background. I hope you know you are not to blame. Only the weakest can perpetrate such horrors. You can't change them. You are stronger than you know. I sleep with nite lights in each room. And a ball bat next to my bed. Read Psalms 91. You will always be in my prayers. Go forth in faith.

[@Mary-cu6te]

@@melodyclark4347 reading scripture doesn't help if the Sunday school teacher used scripture and molested me. That's unacceptable and trauma based programming. Nice try though. I prayed all my life for the other people who used me and for escape. I have come to the conclusion that love doesn't exist and churches are just predator friendly environmental.

[@ChloeShaliniArt]

Totally agree with you Marilyn; splitting is huge and the only way we survive. Thank you for sharing. My love was a Larry too...he died from covid recently but he's with me still.

[@biancachi6435]

My heart is with you.

[@Jessicace]

I'm so sorry for your loss

[@ChloeShaliniArt]

@@biancachi6435 much love & gratitude. Larry was high risk due to having had a kidney transplant in 2006 - we were blessed to have met at all (2015)! As for splitting this can be overcome...I recommend the book 'Dreaming the Soul Back Home'. Love & peace to All 💙

[@ChloeShaliniArt]

@@Jessicace love & gratitude. The sense of loss has been hellishly painful BUT his physical suffering is OVER plus it was his time...I'd received messages (internal) regarding the time of his passing from May 2017 & 6 mths before we in the UK had heard about covid I heard 'it will be pneumonia that takes him'. Covid develops into a form of viral pneumonia. As mentioned above Larry was high risk & very ill already - so please, everyone reading this, be safe but not paranoid - not least because fear itself weakens the immunity. And remember that what we call death is truly a transition to the next stage of Life. I've been in communication with people on the 'other side' for at least 20 yrs...Love & Peace to you All 💙

[@janewestcountry5131]

Love and strength to you .....

[@memccrory]

I am 62 and your video helped me understand things about myself that I previously never understood. You are such a courageous woman!

[@teresaacevedo4825]

Monica McCrory me too!

[@telesterzindoga2682]

Hey me too

[@rebeccalooney1259]

Me too..

[@vonneal1]

Yesss

[@bobbiewungnema2251]

Thank you for showing me there is a light in my life. I can for the first time in 49 years say I'm a Survivor after many years of battling near death to have a want to live and feeling it

[@naemasufi]

Bobbie Wungnema you got this girl, don't let another day be robbed from you.

[@lynnecarr6179]

Bobbie Wungnema sending you love x

[@juswuzz8929]

Bobbie Wungnema you aren't alone. Much love. Xx

[@cstotesberry572]

These words resonate so much with me, "I never had a close connection with anyone."

[@Mary-cu6te]

That's what happens when you have been abused, especially beginning at a early age. Unfortunately, I agree it resonates with me and so many who have no ability yet to perceive the damage.

[@nildabridgeman8104]

I feel the same.. I couldn't develop & still can't have a closeness with anyone. My children are the closest but even them, they're my children. I long to be close to another human being

[@4evacountryable]

Thank you. I'm almost 49. So many simular things. I confronted my mom two years ago. She fell apart saying she always suspected something but could not catch my dad... My dad is still alive in Wisconsin... I haven't talked to him since I was 17. I understand... I hate him. And I hate that I love him. There we're good memories too. You strengthened me. I am afraid though he has hurt others. About 8 months ago I set out for Wisconsin to do away with him... Thankfully my son understood wayward speaking n sent a friend after me. Prison should be for him, not me. And... It has been too many years... Now it's up to God to judge.

[@CLAUDITA803]

I don't understand why you don't sent him to prisión. Bearing in mind he still doing they never stop

[@wandalanders8700]

It just never goes away...held my secret for 36 years ! Grandfather abused me for 3 years, 7-10 years old. I am 67 and I still have days when I cry and wonder how could he have done that to me. In the late 50's it was always ..."that child is making up stories " . My family knew about him and did nothing but deny. My dad's family all knew about him. they turned on a cousin, for telling, so I never told anyone till I couldn't hold it any longer. People finally began (in the media) to talk about this. Everywhere I turned there was a story. And it let me know I wasn't alone and I didn't do anything wrong. I knew even at 7 years old ...if I told mom she would kill him and I would be without my mom. God bless all who have been through this nightmare and survived. I pray healing for us all !

[@texastea5686]

Wanda I'm sorry =(

[@carolkingsafer7456]

PRAYERS YOUR WAY 💞 💖 So MANY of US OUT THERE 💔 Heard a Ted talk about SURVIVERS THERE'S MORE than 42 MILLION OF US OUT THERE ☹️ THERE'S PROBABLY 100 MILLION OF US 😞 OR MORE 💔 WE ARE HERE AT THIS TIME TO HEAL GENERATIONAL ABUSE OF EVERY KIND 😢 PRAYING FOR US ALL TO HEAL THE CHILDREN INSIDE OF US WHO SUFFERED IN SILENCE 💕

[@poet2772]

Wanda Landers I’m so very sorry🙏🏼

[@tinawillis5618]

Wanda Landers so glad you're able to finally at least speak your truth. I'd like to think that if I told my Mom she might of hurt my Father. She didn't. My true pain comes now when I see her staring at me, to hear her telling family, I'm not helping or giving money towards the home. I am like her dirty daughter who can only work to be in her company. My Father died 11-4-16 and I never heard or felt him apologise. Sad so many children never get to be really protected. You right, it never goes away. Happier days for you n us.

[@koolbeans8292]

Wanda Landers I get you.

[@robertgeigle758]

What. A great interview.. My fathers behavior was the same until he died at age 96. They don’t change..

[@amberrose1108]

That's because an evil spirit of perversion and molestation is in them. They can't change without Jesus's help.

[@christinefougere1444]

How very sad Robert.

[@oneseeker2]

Jesus isn’t saving the children that are raped, or murdered, or anyone suffering, Jesus is fiction, it’s a story.

[@naeemahh8442]

I AM SO SORRT ROBERT!

[@Hannahsangel]

Robert Geigle I am so very sorry.

[@saabajoe]

In the late 90's I dated a girl from New Jersey who went to art school in nyc! I was 19 and she was 18 and I could not understand why she could not love me back. Until she told me that everytime weekend that she went home her dad would sleep with her and that it started when she was young. I couldn't not even process that information but she simply never called me anymore one day... I now believe that she simply felt unlovable! These men who destroy their own flesh and blood have no clue all they do to these women...

[@badpuddytatt]

That is so sad. It scares me how much this stuff goes on right under our noses. And how the victims don't usually get the help that they so desperately need. I hate that there are so many children in this world that suffer from the same abuse. I wish I could stop it all. I wish I had the power

[@truegrit7697]

Yes they do - those "men" just don't give a damn. They, like too many men, just want sexual gratification. They should be castrated with a dull, rusty knife.

[@marilynwillett804]

IF SHE WAS 18 AND STILL GOING HOME ON WEEKENDS TO HIM, SHE IS THE COMPLACENT PARTY.

[@saabajoe]

@@marilynwillett804 I know it makes little sense to the rational mind. But in hindsight, and reflecting onnher emotional state at that time, I am leaning towards believing that she was under some sort psychological control from her father, that she had lost her sense of self at that time... I just hope that she was able to get out of that situation for the sake of her mental health

[@darleenmccauley9037]

saabajoe in

[@TheWiseMagpie1]

How blessed am I..!! My father was a good and honest man. He never betrayed my trust! That had to be said, in his honour!! I love you, papa..!!

[@gentlespiritjw4904]

I am happy for you that you were so blessed.

[@gentlespiritjw4904]

@Who Cares Your words just made me cry. Nothing like that for me.

[@evezazzle5974]

@@gentlespiritjw4904 I'm so sorry ❤️😢you are worthy, you are so lovable and so precious endlessly. You never deserved that and it was never your fault🤗

[@gentlespiritjw4904]

@@evezazzle5974 Thank you so much for your kindness, Eve. It means a lot. 😘

[@clauherr6814]

That's stupid commment. Zero empathy.

[@bishopl42]

I told my mom at age 15 that her brother sexually abused me. She believed me, but it was swept under the rug. In my mid 40's I received counseling after years of being violated by others wondering why no one stood up for me and being a mom this seemed like an injustice in my life. I finally asked my dad after my moms death if my mom ever told him hoping he would say....if I only had known. He did not believe me! Furthermore he told friends and relatives I was just looking for attention and the counselor I was seeing was putting these thoughts in my head. Not being believed has had a profound effect, but just another emotion I stuff down deep as we continue to have a superficial relationship to this day. I cried for you when you said your mom did not believe you...I know exactly what that feels like.

[@0906blue]

You and millions of other men and women feel the exact same way.

[@sam7001]

Teela Tequila thank you for this advice. I have three very young children and will be having the same ‘talk’ with them. Heartbreaking that I will have to speak to them about this because they truly believe everybody is their friends.. - Unfortunately reality is there are absolute monsters in this world.

[@kathleendigregorio1701]

How are things for you now, Leslie

[@ameliaweights]

What a beautiful soul. It's heart wrenching to see the emotion on her sweet face so many decades later.

[@michellebolieiro5103]

I love the way she speaks. So flowy and fineness ...so elegantly. Her mom betrayed her more than her father. Poor thing ☹️

[@chickwithaguitar6876]

BOTH are Monsters. The Father is the bigger Monster. He abused her.

[@michellebolieiro5103]

@JRRnotTolkien ,I meant the mother betrayed her more because she actually thought her mom would protect her . When she already knew the dad was an asshole.

[@Karmen2010]

She was lucky to turn out way better than either of those monsters.

[@hlondon2408]

"How could you love your father??" Larry: "I understand. He is your father." Brilliant. "I didn't get a mother and I didn't get a father." What wonderful in-laws she had. They played a huge role in her recovery. Damn. What a sad life Marilyn had. Her parents were sick, selfish and above all, EVIL. Marilyn, you are so strong and beautiful. May all your days shine love and glory upon you.

[@Farrah300]

Larry despised Marilyn's father.

[@joemacinnis1972]

For a father to do wicked things to his own daughter, is beyond evil! What a survivor

[@tapsars7911]

My papa would commit suicide before he even thought of doing something like this to my brother or me . He was even more protective about my brother's daughter than he was about us . No wonder my brother's daughter loves him to bits . Her world revolves around her dada !!

[@madymaguire7325]

What "wicked" things did her father do to her. If it was just plain sex the same as he would do to her mother then it was not the "wicked things" done--the "wickedness" was to whom he did any of these "things." We owe our fathers love and respect--not sex.

[@57andstillkicking]

@@madymaguire7325 What her father did was totally wicked-PERIOD!!!!

[@TheCrownedeagle]

Marilyn I found your story very poignant, and am thrilled for you that you found someone who validated you, your husband, your mother and father in law. How very special.

[@janross7602]

You are a beautiful woman on the inside where it really matters. Love and respect to you lovely Marilyn.

[@jaggirl]

And she is still very beautiful on the outside.

[@valdirmeretchaikovsky155]

When my daughter confronted my mother about my abuse of me and my brother all she said was did that bitch tell you and Mt daughter said no my uncle told. At the age if 47 she told me that man was not my father I am glad. Never went to her funeral. .

[@spirit1366]

"They never stop" correct.Thats why i guarded my girls with my life ( and my son) of all the things I've done in life.NO ONE was touching my kids.MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.(THANKS GOD)

[@denastever2110]

💜

[@kimmatura3564]

I did the exact same thing with my kids. They were never hurt or damaged.

[@007nadineL]

God bless you.

[@lynette599]

This really grabbed me as no other survivor story ever had....this lady's gift in "untangling those rubber-bands" for us to understand exactly how the incest affected her life, is amazing. Not only extremely beautiful, but highly intelligent and eloquent.

[@0110bound]

OnTheBrightSide J

[@patriciasutcliffe7094]

OnTheBrightSide cc

[@marilynwillett804]

She was grasping for other things to matter----but when your father makes you do things in bed as if you are his wife and you are only a small child---there are no other things that matter--it is not complicated--what else could matter? an ice cream? a new toy? a smile or compliment? he murdered the little girl in her. he murdered her childhood, NOW HE'S BURNING HELL ALONG WITH HER MOTHER FOR ETERNITY.

[@Pamsmith59]

@@marilynwillett804 Yes, he murdered her spirit, which is just as precious as her body. What a foolish, foolish man.

[@hebneh]

Back when this was occurring to her, it was absolutely covered up by every single person, and everyone denied it was even happening at all. And because of this denial and coverup, people today constantly are whining about how terrible society is today while back in the good old days, everything was wonderful. No, it was not! People were doing exactly the same bad things then that they're doing now - it just was never discussed or publicized, and the victims suffered in silence.

[@2MyHills]

This is so true. My family has a long history of physical and mental abuse on both sides. Back in the earlier 1900s and even to this day they all never spoke of it. It was a huge family secret until I took my dad to court over a severe beating when I was asleep. When we were growing up we were taught to pretend our brother and sisters were not being hurt even when being beaten in front of us. We were told they were terrible kids and taught to dislike each other; it was so sick. Both my mother & father turned their head & acted like nothing was happening as well when one of them was hitting us or when I was molested by my mother's b/f. l I had to separate from most of my family for my own safety & because they were so angry that the secret was out. I was hospitalized so many times I lost count. I developed severe depression and PTSD and was made fun of by my father for seeking counseling. Things are better now that I am away from the family and their pathology. This lady is so strong to live through what she did. I completely understand why she can hate and love her father at the same time. The bonds that were created in childhood are very hard to break.

[@ggbutterfly4]

Couldn't of said it better.

[@denastever2110]

Amen💜

[@Farrah300]

Excellent point, hebneh.

[@流浪漢パリ]

So, maybe some of us experienced this and with this dissociation, completely forgot about it.

[@SoneBlink]

Thank you Marilyn, you are so brave, beautiful and elegant inside and out. A true inspiration.

[@HWolfe]

Sone Blink I couldn't have said it better.

[@28105wsking]

I choose you, Marilyn. Your father is a monster! I would protect you. I am so furious for your sake.

[@taghazoutmoon5031]

I'm surprised she found true love in life. Most abused women never do

[@gina4808]

Michelle Thorson so sorry for your tragic loss

[@taghazoutmoon5031]

@bailey1950 yes it's a miracle from God to heal and find love. As a woman who has been through multiple abusive relationships, it would take God to help me heal and send me a man who truly loves me. In my experience, abusive relationships tend to repeat themselves... it's a miracle to break the cycle.

[@nonamehi]

Its true. My dad sexually abused me and recently when he was drunk he told my fiance that he was suprized that I was able to find a nice man like him who loved me and was able to have a relationship. The monster was basically suprized that he was unable to completely ruin my life. I don't talk to my dad any more. I have zero contact

[@deborahchesser7375]

@@nonamehi he needs his ass kicked by your man

[@alejandraalejandra4700]

@@taghazoutmoon5031 she is still hurting. Like everyone she was craving for love. I believe that Lary was her escape from pain. With all his faithful and patient personality, he didn't love her UNCONDITIONALY. BECAUSE real unconditional love describe in bible.

[@mrscp04]

Oh my this woman is a true beauty. You just never know what people have lived through and endured.

[@malcolmandrews4942]

How evil for a father to hurt his little girls.

[@davidmorin6667]

I knew a family that was mistreated by a big coward, to hurt your own daughters BURN IN HELL

[@buddleiabee]

psychopaths completely devoid of empathy & emotional consequence. Vile to the core.

[@touraneindanke]

Or boys in some cases

[@buddleiabee]

@ethereal51 Sam Vaknin is a twice diagnosed psychopath. He likes to educate people about his kind. He's not one that physically harms people though (hopefully) His wife is a nice lady. They both do therapy. He's worth a look up on youtube. Particularly in the case of educating people about narcissistic abuse.

[@kellyleighread807]

Mine started while I was between the ages of 0 - 2. He died when I was 4.

[@merncat75]

@6:35 it absolutely broke my heart when she said, "what I wanted til my father's death was his day time love" UGH.. I have absolutely no words for how sad that is

[@esterherschkovich5002]

merncat75 So sad😧

[@joelefave4174]

I AGREE==IF SHE COULD LEAVE HER HUSBAND AFTER THREE MONTHS AND SAY TO US IT WAS LIKE MIXING OIL AND WATER. WHAT INDEED DID SHE FIND WAS AN ""ACCEPTABLE"" MIX , BETWEEN HER AND HER FATHER? ESPECIALLY WHEN HER CHILDHOOD MELTED INTO THE ERA OF AN ""INTELLECTUAL"" WOMAN =15 TO 18 YEARS OF AGE. IT TELLS ME THE SEXUAL BOND SHE DEVELOPED WITH HER FATHER WAS PLEASING==""TO SAY THE LEAST""==MIND YOU AN ABASED BOND AND SICK AS THE DEVIL CAN CREATE.

[@esterherschkovich5002]

JOE LEFAVE Yes some good points made there.I guess we will never know as we are not her but am surprised how she managed.being two people to survive.Day+Night time child.Takes some courage+to do so well in her life.The shock that her so called Mother denied it but I guess was she having sexual relations with her husband maybe not ..so she allowed her husband to sleep with her daught but the power he had over her too!!😨

[@joelefave4174]

THIS WHOLE TOPIC IS A DOG'S BREAKFAST!! YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY CORRECT IN SAYING =IN ESSENCE= ALL CASES DIFFER AND THEIR IS NO PSYCHIATRIST THAT HOLDS "THE" ANSWERS. THERE IS NO COMMON DENOMINATOR TO ATTACH TO PEOPLE SEXUALLY ABUSE,,AND DESTROYED IN MANY, MANY CASES. I CAN FEEL ABLE TO CONTRIBUTE SOME UNDERSTANDING!! WHY? BECAUSE I MARRIED A WOMAN OF 22 YEARS OF AGE WHO HAD BEEN RAPED AT AGE 10 OR 11 SHE CONFESSED TO ME, AFTER 15 YEARS OF MARRIAGE. SHE REVEAL THIS WHEN SHE REALIZED THE MARRIAGE WAS BASICALLY "OVER".\ I """KNEW""" SOMETHING WAS BAD WRONG DURING ALL THOSE 15 YEARS. NOT WANTING TO BREAK UP A FAMILY , I LIVED===="HOPELESSLY HOPING". SICK EH. DEVOTED YES. I INVENTED THIS SAD / FOOLISH SAYING. SHE WAS RUINED BOTH PHYSICALLY AND PSYCHOLOGICALLY. TO BE BUT BLUNT BUT CLEAN, HER SEXUAL ORGAN{S} DID NOT FUNCTION AT ALL. SEX IS NOT EVERYTHING=IN MARRIAGE= HOWEVER MOST ALL YOUNG ADULTS REALIZE THEY HAVE A NATURAL DESIRE TO FULFILL THEIR SEXUAL PLEASURE. IN OTHER WORDS WE ALL WANT A MATE. FOR UTOPIAN PLEASURE AND CREATION OF A FAMILY. THIS STORY OF MIND CAN BE RATHER SHOCKING AS WELL. IF I WAS TO WRITE ""ALL"" THE PAIN I ENDURED. THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. MAY YOU BE BLESSED ABUNDANTLY!

[@joelefave4174]

pls forgive my caps--nerve damage in my right hand

[@karennichols766]

Marilyn it wasn't your fault! You speaking out will help so many others who were abused! May the Lord bless you and your family... and healing for all by God's hand!🌹

[@VABee59]

Thank you. I have never been able to find these words. My story includes violence, trauma, physical and verbal abuse. It was not rape. However, I have almost the same story as she. Violence is violence. My stepfather abused me, my mother abused me. There has never been an apology. I acted out in almost the exact way as Marilyn. My mother never protected me from him. I too have the most wonderful husband, we went to school together too. He loves me unconditionally. He has been through all my acting out phases too. I’m just amazed at our similar stories. That means there are so many of us out here. People don’t understand us. May God bless all of us and thank you Marilyn for sharing your story.

[@franceslock1662]

Bee D isn't it good that survivors are starting to talk without being shut down by others. We need to actively help ourselves and offer each other acceptance and the understanding that comes from being a fellow survivor.

[@kbroers6480]

Dear Bee, One lady said you got to help yourself instead of waiting for Prince Charming. She's right but for those of us with the PTSD and the destructive role models, just finding a good one is breaking the chain. I consider my marriage to be one of my greatest achievements because I broke the chain. Pretty easy to repeat. PLEASE PEOPLE, DON'T REPEAT THE BASTARD CYCLE!

[@nokes22]

The bravery and courage Marilyn has shown here is testament to her resilience, beauty and inner strength. I’m so pleased she met a wonderful man and spent her life with him. She’s an amazingly inspirational survivor. ❤️

[@TheChristopherBlake1]

Thank you for having the courage to share your experience! I'm a incest survivor from the homosexual spectrum . Abuse is like an anchor that pulls us down to the deepest, darkness, downward spirals that eventually doom us with paralysis, depression & auto-immune dis ease . I have rheumatoid arthritis = Pain & Punishment from past . I'm working on this . Again, thank you! Huge Hugs !

[@udenisa1864]

I am so sorry for your pain! Hope you find peace and joy! Your comment brought tears to my eyes. Many of us with autoimune diseases come from abuse.

[@Ida-Adriana]

Hello from Cornwall!

[@shockofthenew]

I'm glad you feel able to be open about the abuse you suffered. I hope you are able to keep working to accept and love yourself... please know that what was done to you was not your fault, not even a little bit, not even if you 'participated'... the psychological effect of a loved-one, an authority figure, someone older than you is profound, the manipulation over time is subtle and pervasive. You are not to blame and you didn't deserve to be abused. Sending love x

[@wildershoney2439]

I cried reading your comment. Not that there's a scale for emotion trauma or pain but to me, same see abuse messes with people in an added way and I whole heartedly am glad you are with us on this planet. You are extremely brave and because you know the root of your problem you WILL have success healing. 💜

[@globaloptimatarot3676]

The mother ALWAYS knows.

[@cmebans35]

Some mothers participate with the abuse

[@cellygomez2677]

No, not always...

[@frenchvanilla7109]

@@cellygomez2677 You can pretend all you want but trust me, mother's have the strongest intuitions especially when it comes to their children. They always know!

[@lauragriffith1826]

No. I'm sure you are wrong. A person doesn't assume their partner is capable of sexual attraction to their own offspring. It's not natural, and isn't a thought in a regular person's head. Now, if it is found out, by one way or another, the parent needs to jump in and be the child's complete advocate. Period.

[@dee-tx5jd]

@@frenchvanilla7109 not every mother has a strong intuition or even cares what's happening to the child.

[@debbiethomas4472]

Beautiful woman, beautiful soul! You DID NOT cause this! You were violated in the worst ways. Monsters are real. I admire you for speaking out and holding your head up so this monster lost his power the more you talk. You're not a victim, you're a survivor!

[@oliviacadena2036]

Amen to that!!! I agree with you. 👍👍👍👍😓👏👏👏👏

[@zoehannah6278]

I'm so sorry your mother didn't protect you!

[@bridgetryder5352]

The mother probably hated sex and was happy that her husband looked elsewhere.

[@amberlilly4101]

Yep!!

[@narcsinart7179]

@@bridgetryder5352 anyone would hate sex with that man he didnt make love he only used and abused tho it does not excuse her mother

[@milkandhoney9849]

Zoe Hannah mom can hurt you more than the abuser

[@julierichens4218]

Oh, Jesus! What kind of heart walks to the bedroom door where her child is being molested, and makes the conscious decision to walk away and abandon her child??

She is a stunning beauty and she is second class to none. I can say I dont even know her but I definitely love her like a dear sister.

[@sophiecat2161]

This makes so much sense to me now. I've never trusted people and now I'm older prefer my own company. It's just easier with less stress, anxiety and fear of being hurt. Thank you for posting this. I'm sure many people found this helpful.

[@sheilakelly9116]

Marilyn, you are a beautiful woman. Your story is incredible and I am so sorry you had to live it. I am glad that you found peace, validation and the love of a good man. You are an inspiration.

[@kaylapup16]

What a well-spoken woman who explained her story very well. So strong and brave.

[@christinad4432]

“I didn’t want to go back and get her” wow. So so well said. Such a power thing to say and she worded it beautifully

[@Tangerinetaco]

The way she’s talking and conducting herself is really graceful. It’s too bad that this way of being is becoming extinct in America.

[@nokes22]

Tangerinetaco She has a really beautiful voice. Very reminiscent of the old Hollywood actresses.

[@titania145]

Education and grace are just about extinct ...Ms. Warren does have it, so sorry she left the campaign.

[@Gray-goose]

She is a speaker. Talking pretty is her job.

[@malola100]

THATS very much true... she is like a classic lady very well spoken

[@Quantum36911]

Very difficult to stay full of light and grace when you are abused and surrounded by animals. You start acting like one just to stay safe.

[@Mpirefilms]

She is gorgeous. Her smile is angelic. She should go back into acting now. I'm so glad she found love to heal her pain. Larry is the Man. We need more men like Larry in the mix.

[@RescuedByMary]

Mpirefilms 10:20 “Because I repressed the memories of insist, I didn’t know what was ruining my life” ... Let that sink in ... .. . She literally didn’t remember what had happened to her ... .. . It almost seems to surreal to be possible; to literally go through life with no conscious idea what had happened to you ... Childhood sexual rape is so horrific to a little child, that they cannot accept what is happening to them, so their little mind somehow pretends that it isn’t happening, and it is repressed so deeply that it may not even be recalled for many, many, many years ... I know, it happened to me ... 😐 RbM

[@Mpirefilms]

@Ujuani Abelsen How did you learn how to be this type of man? Did you get your compassion and patience from your parents? a teacher? We need more men to empathize with the pain of women.

[@Mpirefilms]

@Ujuani Abelsen You and your wife should write a book about how couples can heal each other from childhood trauma. You would be super rich---and might heal the entire world. What you wrote is so impressive and encouraging. Thank you brother for having such a remarkable character and being a defender of women.

[@Farrah300]

@Ujuani Abelsen Congratulations on your 25 years of marriage. Also bless you for being patient with her until she was ready for intimacy.

[@Essie-Cakes]

She incredibly beautiful and her smile is out of the world. So graceful!

[@nyuni3322]

makes you want to cry what children have to go through

[@BlueEyesBrittany]

At least one survivor who found happyness with her husband and his families. Many don t. Many try to find someone whom they could trust to love them and help them through what they went through, but get more abused or more horrible experience. At least, Marilyn found someone and a new family to truly love her.

[@esterherschkovich5002]

BlueEyes Brittany I agree with what you said!

[@sacredgeometry2344]

BlueEyes Brittany do you say tractor to Predators narcissist that abuse them

[@margueriteoreilly9490]

BlueEyes Brittany p

[@user-ci1kz1cc6t]

Sacred Geometry. Can you say that so that it makes sense. I have no idea what you were trying to say.

[@manichairdo6346]

Didn't she say she gor married before but ended the abusive relationship 3 months later? She eventually found herself able to receive love from her husband, Larry. Though not without the problems that still affected her... paralysis...sexual side of the marriage closed down.

[@HealingthruAIArt]

"What I wanted until my father's death was his daytime love, and (but) I only got him at night"... WOW.....This has me in tears because it's still my truth today! My memories resurfaced 4 years ago and my entire family is standing behind him. Because I looked so "perfect" during these times, it's easier to believe that I've gone crazy now than he's always been a sick man and they have always been wrong in their judgement. 🌻

[@whoevwhatev]

@ 6:35 You’re right. Nailed it. Her entire testimony could be characterized by these few sentences - the insight it provided is… astounding

[@whoevwhatev]

Prayers & blessings to you my sister in Christ - our time her in this dimension is a mere vapor/whisper - thankfully you have an eternity ahead - of nothing, NOT A THING , but being saturated with genuine love - protected from any HINT of evil - as the despicable evil you’ve endured. I am so so sorry. Even tho we don’t know each other (I’m in Georgia) I have deep respect and unwavering love for you here/now - as I do for the other survivors listed down here 🥺 I’m just so SICK of my gender being **relentlessly** victimized by those seething with testosterone (and entitlement) 😡

[@HealingthruAIArt]

🌻💜🙏🌻💜

[@granmabern5283]

@@HealingthruAIArt kudos to you for stopping him from doing it to someone else! You can’t fix stupid and you can’t expect rewards from broken humans. God will reward your courage a hundredfold. A friend of mine stayed silent until her uncle raped her little sister a decade later. It’s better to tell, even if we suffer from the telling. But then we need to let go and let God, and get on with our life.

[@theresas740]

I believe you!

[@doshinall]

I'm overjoyed that you found your husband! Your beautiful face lights up when you talk about him. What an insightful (and long suffering) man he was/is. True, unconditional love. Blessings to you both.

[@000001willy]

What a revealing account of one person's life of trauma and recovery.

[@madeleine8977]

Marilyn, you are eloquent and beautiful. I am glad you found a way to survive this abuse. Your coping mechanism and your explanation was so clear.

[@ccemanes3609]

This was cathartic for me. You are so blessed you had an angel watching you who finally confronted you. I never had anyone and to this day, at 65, I cannot hold a relationship. I took psychology classes and became a counselor thinking that these would help me. I became knowledgeable of human behavior, but knowing did not heal me. I cried as I listen to you. Yes to all of the above and having Jesus is all I need and yet I wonder what it would be like to experience the loving and gentle touch of an adoring man. Thank you and Good bless you and your husband.

[@MyUnfilteredDiary]

I wasn't fortunate enough to find a man that loved me unconditionally but i do find two best friends that did. They are my ride and die

[@msdanet31]

NaturallyMeMya Your not done living yet and God has your soul mate in waiting 🙏🏾❤️

[@kimdukeshire4506]

I love you, Marilyn~ I can clearly relate to your story. I Thank you for giving your all to share your pain to help survivors of incest.

[@paula23525]

Much respect for your story and for you as a person, Marilyn.

[@feurigerStern]

When I confronted my mother, she cried for herself. She went into martyr mode. Her modus operandi whenever she was confronted. It was always about her. From then on, it was as though I had never said anything. No apologies, no nothing. When I told my father, he became very sad and told me that he was sorry that he wasn't there to protect me.

[@Ida-Adriana]

My mother ignored it & my father said it was my responsibility and age 7 to not get sexually abused

[@frenchvanilla7109]

@@Ida-Adriana Wow your father is a fool, a complete coward unworthy of being a man and a father. Hopefully you don't believe children can prevent sexual abuse, or anyone for that matter. When someone is abused or raped it's never their fault. Your mother ignored it and she is also a coward. Keep both of them out of your life. Go to therapy heal and learn to value love and protect yourself as an adult. Children don't have the power to fight for themselves, but now that you're an adult you have all the power.💗🙏

[@MidnightCrow928]

Same girl, same! When I told my mom she said she was sorry and wanted to know who all had I told. They must think she’s a terrible mother. Or make excuses like she needed a break, the babysitter and her husband were trusted-they watched everyone’s kids. It was all a defense about her. When she started crying saying my best friend and husband must think she’s horrible, I was the one comforting HER! I kept my silence for 25+years

[@ilovefredreika]

What a courageous woman. Lovely person.

[@cheerp7313]

You have a beautiful soul. Your honesty and candor make you radiant in so mich positivity. You are such a beautiful person.

[@lindac2412]

Her mother is as guilty as her father.

[@sandydallas9877]

Linda C Actually I believe she's worse than her father, he's sick, albeit that doesn't excuse what he did but her mother was aware of what her father was doing and was complacent . How a child's mother could know that someone was abusing their 5year old and not kill him is impossible for me to grasp. He not only abused Marylin but also her sisters, hard to say how many other children he had access and opportunities to abuse through the years.

[@madambutterfly7513]

I agree her mother was just as guilty if not more!!! My own 4 yr old daughter was sexually abused by my boyfriend, I believed her & pressed charges against the sick bastard!! He ended up going to prison for 10 years!! Your mother is supposed to protect you!!!

[@christidee5525]

As counselor I often find once a person worked through the abuse they become really angry at the other parent who didn't do more to protect them. Usually to begin with they tend to idolise the other parent- in a way to, at that time when they are still vulnerable because of the abuse- to at least feel comforted by the thought of having had one parent who cared.

[@sandydallas9877]

Christi Dee How very sad, no wonder these people without alot of very good therapy, don't have much of a chance

[@carolveternick3033]

I TOTALLY AGREE.... THIS HAPPENED OFTEN, in the 1950's-1960's!...

[@deborrastrom8559]

Hi Marilyn, this is Debi Strom. I met you in Palm Desert around 2003 at Barbara Sinatra center Fund raiser. We saw each other & hugged hard with tears very few words. I wore a distinctive Green blazer ...I also Stood...our picture together was taken By Palm Springs Life. I pray for you daily. I felt then how many you set free, as you fight to tell the truth Bravely. You sacrifice your relationships with your family to tell the truth & set yourself & others free from Feeling isolated & alone all the time. "Thankyou", seems like a word that just doesn't do you justice. It was an honor to meet you as I feel your not only a Queen but a "General" to the army of those who suffer alone, as you did. You are fortunate to find the right person as a husband but sharing this gives others hope they too can find the loves of their lives. Blessings, for each new day you hear the morning dove coo all is right for you. Db

[@jamigen1]

I'm here for you💐 When I grew up and had my children, I learned its ok to say NO' and no one should touch children! I got the nerve up to call my monsters. One cussed me out, the other one told me he had to leave for work, he was a correctional officer. He'd call the next day. He lived about 500 miles away. About 2:00 in the morning we got a knock on the door,, it was this HUGE Grown Man bawling like a baby on his knees begging for forgiveness. 😢 His heart was truly with me. We remained friends until he passed away 6 years later. The other person passed 3 years later in a violent death. It's hard living with those ghost in your closet because you feel like it's your fault, and you'll never feel good enough for anyone. God be You Beautiful Marilyn 🌷❤

[@Pamsmith59]

Thank you for sharing, Colleen. Beautifully written.

[@epbead123]

Not your fault_ Ever. God Bless.

[@texastea5686]

Cat, I'm glad you got the nerve to call them. Sorry you went thru that.

[@DrGarri]

I'm a grown up man, and still this classy, beautiful and dignified lady made me tear up. Her eyes alone tell the horror story her life was. If I ever knew that someone I know is doing what this monster (and mother) did, I think it would be very difficult for me to stop myself from putting a bullet in his miserable head, nothing is more attrocious than hurting a child or an old person, nothing. This lady deserves the happiest life, it is some consolation to know that she found the right man, who would love her for the wonderful human being she is.

[@0906blue]

The best part is she doesn't play the victim role, she doesn't let her past define her.

[@debras.6899]

@@0906blue she was very ill for a long time because of this abuse. It would not be a role that anyone is playing because she was indeed a victim. It caused a great deal of pain in her life for far too long but there is no escaping pain when you suffer like that from childhood. I commend anyone who can get through this kind of Hell Without committing suicide

[@0906blue]

I know all about it. I survived abuse. It leaves scars. I think of how the world is now and on a daily basis children are being traded for a fix in a drug house, awful. I think of Joyce Meyers and she was able to reached so many other women who had been abused.

[@nildabridgeman3739]

I love & appreciate your HEART to help survivors like me. She's right, we want to hear someone will protect & care about us

[@0906blue]

She's a beautiful woman inside and out. Hopefully her speaking out will help other incest survivors.

[@sunshinewildfire7087]

I'm so heartbroken for this beautiful soul. She is so brave sharing her story. It will help so many people. What an incredible gift.

[@OneTrueWord1988]

She absolutely glows with happiness when she talks about her husband! So happy for both of them. 💕