Absolute Mad Lads - The Merchant Of Death

[@CountDankula]

Go to tryfum.com/DANKULA and use code DANKULA to save an additional 10% off your order today.

[@davidwhitelow6536]

We need one on count dante and el Marino Loco.

[@stoph19831983]

Engagement

[@MrJturner74]

Good thing that WNBA player got traded just when his services would come in handy. All that gear in Afghanistan and Ukraine isn't going to sell itself.

[@alexg4711]

But shes gay and hes not so america won.

[@mranapra6439]

You didn’t trade him for a NBA player the president that got voted in Traded him for a WNBA player

[@Rustysheriffsbadge854]

The most upsetting trade in basketball history for sure. To give away a hall of famer like that

[@Danimal4321]

Maybe you mean women basketball because trading away magic johnson was pretty up there

[@micnorton9487]

Well yeah Viktor's jump shot wasn't stellar but his head fakes were legendary and his endurance unmatched,, he and El Chapo had a bet who would be traded out first because of an international incident,, and the Fed - wide book had El Chapo at 2-1... And you KNOW El Chapo bet against himself and made a k*lling lol......

[@darklombax2580]

@@micnorton9487 let’s not forget his value as a player because of his speech ability. The way he would do press, interviews and press conferences brought value no one could ever imagine.

[@NuggetsNBAChamps]

​@@Danimal4321 Utah didn't trade the Magic pick, they were fucked over by the league to get Magic in LA with Kareem.

[@chucknorris408]

Right they get a legend and we get a washed up center.

[@thecaptain138]

There are over 550 million firearms in worldwide circulation. That's one firearm for every twelve people on the planet. The only question is: How do we arm the other eleven? ~ Yuri Orlov

[@majorccunliffe4662]

lord of war....great Cage movie

[@CountCorax]

Can someone do the maths for an updated version of that quote? Are we down to 1 gun for everyone yet or not?

[@vapormissile]

I get to get the guy from Uncommon Valor - "...bargain basement..." Thompson guns & rusty BARs. 😢🎉

[@thecaptain138]

​@@CountCorax We're around 1 firearm for every 8 people now.

[@ebfromtha410]

@@thecaptain138it aint much but it’s honest work

[@TheTacoKing13]

The Fact we Traded a WNBA person for him will always piss me off

[@Monkey.D.Pression]

A WNBA plqyer that smuggled weed into russia... she shouldve stayed there

[@rossicourvosi218]

Deal of the century 😂 I bet the Russians couldn't believe it when the offer was made

[@dogshake]

@@rossicourvosi218 That’s the moment that every single other country around the world realized how far we had fallen. We were already becoming a laughing stock before that situation, but afterwards…..we just look straight regarded.

[@MakerInMotion]

Especially when a former Marine named Paul Whelan had already been a prisoner there for years and she was traded instead. The democrats will let the former Marine rot while the America hating basketball player gets priority.

[@netrolancer1061]

It wasn't like we could've gotten that U.S Marine, and or that U.S teacher out instead.

[@jaffarebellion292]

"I'm with the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms" "Let me guess, this isn't about the alcohol or the tobacco"

[@jamesbuchanan3145]

I gotta remember that line when the glowies come knocking 😂

[@allistairlicorice310]

That prisoner exchange has got to be one of the most humiliating things I have ever seen this country to do itself, aside from the sloppy Afghanistan withdrawal.

[@theempirestrikesback]

Check out the withdrawal from Saigon. That was pretty f'ed.

[@quagmoe7879]

As an American I’m proud of our “sloppy” withdrawal. We were there 20 damn years, I don’t care how sloppy it was to pull out as long as we do indeed pull out. The important part is ending the War immediately and allowing the Afghans to rule themselves in the way they see fit.

[@mustangmckraken1150]

@theempirestrikesback Nah, Afghanistan was worse and it's not even close. The idiots in Saigon destroyed a lot of perfectly good equipment and a lot more non military were left to die in Afghanistan

[@mustangmckraken1150]

@quagmoe7879 You're an idiot lol, a lot of people died for absolutely no reason because of the logistics of the withdrawal and call me crazy, I don't think the average person in Afghanistan wants to be led by a military dictatorship

[@ShredCo]

You don't understand.

[@IstvanThree]

"And while the biggest arms dealer in the world is your boss - the President of the United States, who ships more merchandise in a day than I do in a year - sometimes it's embarrassing to have his fingerprints on the guns." ~ Yuri "The Lord Of War" Orlov.

[@alyssarichardson2544]

The government: Arms dealing: *I sleep* Without a loicense: *REAL SHIT*

[@Unknown1-1986]

Yeah we know what it’s like to live in America. Ya dick. lol!! All love brotha

[@IchigoKurosaki_]

We traded the merchant of death for a basketball American that snuck weed into Russia despite knowing the laws there.

[@wenlisman]

What were you gaining by having him sit in a U.S prison?

[@IchigoKurosaki_]

​@wenlisman tell me you have an iq BELOW 80 without telling me. 🤡🤡

[@IchigoKurosaki_]

Tell me you have an iq BELOW 80 without telling me 🤡

[@wenlisman]

The irony of you sending me two messages saying that. Answer my question bro let me see your IQ@@IchigoKurosaki_

[@w4tt58]

​@@wenlismanhis loss is the world's gain. Considering he was selling massive amounts of firearms to terrorists groups in Africa and the Middle East. Where he got those arms? Maybe has something to do with us trading him away for so little and I get the no American left behind thing but bro. The person they traded for HATES AMERICA.

[@adamfrazer5150]

In cynical terms : Viktor was hunted because he wasn't listed on NASDAQ

[@alyssarichardson2544]

Arms dealing: I sleep Without a loicense: *real shit*

[@cassandras8797]

neither are most glowies, to be fair

[@SelecaoOfMidas]

​@@cassandras8797Don't need to be on the NASDAQ if you're backed by Big Daddy Warbucks. [taps forehead]

[@iminvalhallabitches]

He didn't want to touch their wall.

[@adamfrazer5150]

@@iminvalhallabitches he probably had more morals than the average broker-cowboy 👍

[@ALovelyBunchOfDragonballz]

US Govt: hey, you cant traffic weapons, thats our job! (Op Fast and Furious)

[@MGTexan47]

"You're the lord of War." It's called Warlord. "I prefer it my way".

[@alanduncan9204]

I worked in Angola in the early 2000's. The local lads told me that they all had an AK47 still in their house/huts just in case it all kicked off again. The Russians were flying in tonnes of arms and flew out with crates of diamonds.

[@johnrice1943]

Sweet trade

[@brunojyrkiainen6686]

Russians are better at trading things

[@PauloAlexoliveira]

Angolan here, still have one in my closet.

[@jillvalentinefan77]

​@@PauloAlexoliveira Use it in good health may you never need it.

[@Renone87]

@@PauloAlexoliveiragood decision who knows the future keep your family safe 🙏

[@mr.abrams9885]

The fact that we traded the guy with a basketball American says a lot about American society and more about American leadership as a whole

[@bloodaonadeline8346]

one that actively hates the country

[@LukSter18998]

oh you already said it

[@wenlisman]

That they take care of their own? That is what you want.

[@kkandola9072]

Shows you the retardation of Biden voters.

[@bobwolfninja206]

Clown world 🤡

[@ornu01]

Truly, Nicholas Cage has done everything.

[@shnorkeythefourth4572]

No one can face the Rage of Nicholas Cage

[@redneckson]

​@@shnorkeythefourth4572only on Stage

[@illeagle9560]

@mightymqb4800 nobody will ever compare to Lord Cage. So don't be jealous of us, just be jealous of The Cage.

[@Rick_Cleland]

*_"NOT THE BEES!!"_*

[@princessapplestrach6327]

He got bee tortured, became the Ghost Rider and stole the Devil's soul , stole the declaration of independence and sold guns to dictators , He's truly a god of cinema

[@sadsoup5821]

Him throwing a peace sign while being an arms dealer called "The merchant of death" is probably one of the coldest things a human being has done

[@W4RL0RD83]

Nah, he was throwing up the rest in peace sign.. that's gangsta

[@andresmcguire-buckley1659]

Some people don't consider it a peace sign.

[@alyssarichardson2544]

@@andresmcguire-buckley1659 yeah isn't it victory? The 2 fingers making a V?

[@andresmcguire-buckley1659]

@@alyssarichardson2544 maybe, some consider it as some sort of evil sign. I watched a video that was talking about what common hand signals today used to mean back then, I don't remember much, so I might try to look for it again.

[@Bandog23]

I remember there being a movie about the plane being intercepted over Afganistan

[@malcolmliang]

In Pokemon terms, We gave the Russian their mewtwo ... and we got a pidgee.

[@funbro99]

Nah ..pichu

[@rustythefoxcoon5143]

Shame to you both! Not even Magikarp is accurate as that does more for society. It makes me laugh, BG does not.

[@funbro99]

@@rustythefoxcoon5143 oddish?

[@thiswebsitesucksTBH]

we got a zigzagoon

[@eidolon1426]

So far you've all implied that the thing we gave up the Mew-Two for has *potential...* We're actually looking at something along the lines of a Rattata, as the best that can do is become a Raticate, which is *still* effectively useless. If anybody knows a completely worthless, low-tier, non-evolving Pokémon, then be sure to let us know so we can make the comparison better.

[@mhick3333]

I had a marine mechanic friend who was working on a ship that got into a post soviet port , he said the ex soviet sailors would sell ANYTHING

[@Trump2024asw]

America rember this note national guard armories.

[@VestigeV47]

And we gave him back to Russia for nothing

[@zacclmfao3980]

i wouldnt say nothing, but damn close

[@jamesm9250]

The CIA wanted him back out on the market so they took the deal

[@megakillerx]

Can’t let your precious blacks be mildly inconvenienced.

[@Swanjeff1]

For a women with a penis

[@log7029]

For nothing? I don’t think so buddy. I believe this was a well worthwhile trade as it has greatly improved my absolute favorite sport, _Womans_ basketball.

[@thecaptain138]

Of all the weapons in the vast Soviet arsenal nothing was more profitable than Avtomat Kalashnikova model of 1947, more commonly known as the AK-47, or Kalashnikov. It's the world's most popular assault rifle, a weapon all fighters love. An elegantly simple nine pound amalgamation of forged steel and plywood, it doesn't break, jam, or overheat. It will shoot whether it's covered in mud or filled with sand. It's so easy even a child could use it, and they do. ~ Yuri Orlov

[@aregularperson7573]

From the lord of war the best movie ever made FIGHT ME

[@jamaldominicbarr7379]

No arguments from me Boss

[@moonasha]

@@aregularperson7573 definitely not the best, but they don't make movies like that anymore that's for sure.

[@carsoncasmirri3874]

@@aregularperson7573I’m not even an AK fanboy and I agree heavily with this

[@jhoughjr1]

I had a wasr-10 ak and yeah they are amazing machines

[@Street.Hermit]

as a true red blooded American I can respect this man’s hustle.

[@theforlanjoker4457]

My uncle disappeared for 2 years in the 80s, he speeks 12 languages, my mum got a call of a solicitor as he was leaving me all his money. He never talks what he did or where he went. I can confirm it's the number one thing intelligence agency's look for.

[@TheSouloftheDragon]

And we traded him for a basketball player who wasn't even that good. Awesome.

[@largemouthfisherman5298]

There are good players in the WNBA? 😜

[@Zach0451]

US citizens that are political prisoners in foreign nations > washed up foreign arms dealers that have been rotting in prison for 2 decades.

[@CidVeldoril]

I mean, it should not matter if you benefit your country. If you are in shit abroad, it is your country's job to get you out of said shit.

[@BusterHimen-1202]

Traded him for a nobody

[@ThZuao]

@@CidVeldoril The thing is that they had the option of the wnba player or a former marine sentenced to 19 years in prison over bogus espionage charges. Well, the marine is still in prison. Jailed in 2019.

[@johncherrybone4835]

This is the worst trade deal in the history of trade deals

[@SpartanTrigger]

As an American … we got a bum deal 😂

[@Danimal4321]

I once traded my charizard card for a twinkie I like to think that's pretty up there.

[@RT-qd8yl]

@@Danimal4321 Right up there with buying burritos with Bitcoin in the 2010s

[@Nick46289]

Russian here. Yeah. Yeah, it was. I would say "thanks, lol", but - no. You don't even get that. You get _nothing._ You _lose._ G'day, sir.

[@RaddyC]

Maybe ever

[@thecaptain138]

You call me evil. But unfortunately for you, I'm a necessary evil. ~ Yuri Orlov

[@sestorm2159]

Love the jokes that you sprinkle in such as the old Rhodesian SAS story that rebels used to put their rear sights at 900 meter because it would hurt more😂

[@scottessery100]

I wondered about that 😊 cheers

[@Steph-sk3xb]

USA traded an international arms dealer that was on the wanted list right net to Osama for a WNBA player on a pot charge. This still hasn't sunken in for me yet.

[@mnemonicpie]

Genderally and racially confused WNBA player*

[@AndrewMclachlan-hq4jp]

We traded for a basket ball player when there’s a war veteran we could of swapped for

[@Garrus1995]

It really is a slap in the face to those who serve. Whelan, a man who had served his country as a U.S. Marine (despite having been born in Canada) and had worked as a police officer is left to rot while we instead get a talentless “athlete” who had repeatedly voiced her hatred of her own country. We really do live in a clown world.

[@AndrewMclachlan-hq4jp]

@@Garrus1995 and she’s a women nba player not really an athlete

[@thatindiandude4602]

​@@Garrus1995who btw, can't even dunk. I didn't know they could stack manure that high.

[@luciferthedoberman8991]

@@AndrewMclachlan-hq4jp He is a guy

[@scottneil1187]

Could HAVE, ffs.

[@slimdiddyd]

Dankula dropped a madlads video. My day has improved

[@lynnkay417]

Same!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@annatardlordofderps9181]

I wish everyone in the comments luck in getting a nickname as cool as "The Merchant of Death."

[@paulnash9851]

My enemies call me the “SCHLONG OF DOOOOOM !!!!...”

[@claudiofabian1054]

I'd rather not, but thank you.

[@cavalieroutdoors6036]

​@@paulnash9851something tells me PeeWee is more accurate...

[@zacharymcmillan2788]

My family's nickname for me is Vlad the Inhaler,for ah...certain reasons. 🗣💨 🤣

[@T3nch1]

As an autist I can attest that languages are some of the most interesting things you can learn. Not because of the utility of them but because once you start digging into etymology shit starts gettin weird and wild.

[@oz_jones]

Ah, a fellow linguistic autist. A linguist, If you Will.

[@nextcaesargaming5469]

Fellow autist, currently learning two languages right now with plans to learn more in the future, can confirm

[@adenkyramud5005]

Also, learning stuff like gaelic languages or asian languages is finally something to actually get your brain fully occupied. Learning English and french was always something i did while doing other things as well but those... fuckin hell they're weird for me and i love it

[@violenceislife1987]

As a fellow linguistics autist, I can confirm

[@stevemcraemanager7119]

Lord Of War opening sequence is one of the best in cinematic history.

[@walkerallen425]

Only problem it has is that the gun shoots the casing out with the actual projectile. Kind of an obvious oversight about a movie chronicling the life of an international arms dealer. Still love the movie

[@Logan-nk4vg]

Wow this guys almost as important as a black WMBA player you can’t even remember the name of.

[@incitingariot9925]

Bethany? I thought it was Beatrice......

[@scottneil1187]

You can't even remember the name of the organisation, its WNBA.

[@MakerInMotion]

People care so little that the stands were empty when she made her WNBA return.

[@Damonnanashi]

​@@incitingariot9925Guys, come on. It's Bridget.

[@MaxiemumKarnage]

It was like Grimer or Koffing or Alakazam idk

[@thecaptain138]

Selling a gun for the first time is a lot like having sex for the first time. You're excited but you don't really know what the hell you're doing. And some way, one way or another, it's over too fast.

[@johnrice1943]

Accurate

[@charlessalmond7076]

Damn. Using that analogy, I feel like a Ho! I've lived check to check most of my life. I've also had a passion for firearms since I received my first, a Stevens mdl.15a .22lr-l-s, when I was 5. The only way to buy a new gun was to sell a old one. The height of my collection when I was younger was around 45-50 guns. In that era, I carried for a living doing recovery work. In my 50's now. 22 currently. Currently shopping for a "Heritage " 1911. Probably gonna have to part with 3 or 4 for that one. Sorry for the rant. The comment got me frisky!]😆

[@NorseCrusader1]

The largest gun runner in the world is whatever sitting president of United States of America that you can name.

[@robbiepemberton]

If you think the president of the USA of the Priminister of the UK or France or Germany or any other global leader has control of that, you are misguided. Who do you think puts them in power? Or for that matter, anyone who could possibly be voted into power. Smoke and mirrors. You think you have a choice? You don't!!

[@woofy9977]

hurr durr

[@yerfriendlyneighborhoodsco3337]

i mean...they ain't technically wrong@@woofy9977

[@perfectogaming5240]

Obamna

[@SelecaoOfMidas]

Been nice knowing you? 😅

[@The_Petrichor]

Love the Lord of War reference. Also the best intro of Nicholas Cage in any movie ever. Man standing among a sea of spent casings, turns around with a big ol smile like Mr. Rogers. Makes me giggle every time

[@pbabiesinspace6112]

It always makes me happy when I see a new Madlads drop. The Count is just fun to listen to.

[@CharlieKellyEsq]

As an American rural housing enjoyer, i personally own 6 rifles, 2 shotguns, and 2 handguns. I am considered under armed where i live

[@CharlieKellyEsq]

I have over 2,000 rounds for all of my weapons, and I always feel under prepared

[@evanwilliams3645]

I’ve got a little over 10k and I feel under prepared considering I’ve heard of folks with 10x that.

[@ALovelyBunchOfDragonballz]

Those are rookie numbers, gotta bump those numbers up.

[@robbiepemberton]

If you enjoy having them then do so. Practice til your heart is content. Have a tool for every job and min max it, be the best. Make that 1 shot kill to put food on the table and ensure that the animal doesn't suffer. It's fucking scary when you have to be more armed than your neighbour "just in case" back here in the UK we quietly own them. We go out together and we teach each other. There is no arms race. You yanks are literaly making each other paranoid and it needs to stop.

[@dimadobrik4516]

​@@CharlieKellyEsqlike it's gonna matter if you need more than a tenth of that

[@thecaptain138]

They say, "Evil prevails when good men fail to act." What they ought to say is, "Evil prevails."

[@nobodynoone2500]

Are you not a good man? Or do you not act? Either?

[@desolder75]

Evil prevails when Eel Actions get Stollen. And that explains how we got here today.

[@Italianguy37]

"Evil prevails because good is dumb." Dark Helmet.

[@robbiepemberton]

It's basically what happened with the phrase... "the customer is always right...............in matters of taste" The last bit always gets forgotten about. I think you're onto something here.

[@johnrice1943]

​@@nobodynoone2500were not omnipresent and there is much evil not being stopped, rather promoted.

[@thesilliestclown]

>early life >born to parents

[@AAKVII]

(((early life)))

[@galmechveteris2163]

Allegedly...

[@Double_Vision]

"He was born at a very young age"

[@n1ls53]

Better than most basketball americans

[@seanbrazell7095]

Lord of War with THE Cage was one of the most VASTLY underrated films ever made. Its easily my favorite Cage the Nick film.

[@Renone87]

Cult classic

[@andyfriederichsen]

The AK-47 was already being spread around the world in huge numbers long before the collapse of the Soviet Union. The Soviet Union supplied AKs to just about anyone and everyone who was socialist or communist. Also, the AK-47 had been replaced by the AKM in the 1950s and later the AK-74 replaced the AKM in the 1970s.

[@Butter_Warrior99]

I remember when Biden traded Him for a basket ball player. Just great trade Joe, great trade.

[@w4tt58]

He had to get Obama his teammate. Who's next though?

[@scottneil1187]

Apparently so does the hundreds of other folk that left that comment.

[@dogshake]

@@scottneil1187 Aw, you a WNBA fan? I heard there are less of you guys than there are astronauts.

[@BruhMoment-fr4zr]

The Russians were certainly happy lmao

[@quagmoe7879]

I’m happy because I believe in free market trade. The “Merchant of Death” just does the same thing the Government does in arming people. Sick of America thinking it can just do whatever it wants but nobody else can.

[@TheGrimmCommoner]

Amazing how more valuable the life of a treasonous lesbian in a sport no one watches is (and whom actually broke the law), compared to a patriot who was unjustly arrested and remains in captivity. I wonder if they can still be swapped.

[@Vb757aye]

An American journalist was killed in a Ukrainian prison recently. Guess he wasn’t the right skin color to be worth saving according to the current regime.

[@moonasha]

don't forget the fact biden chose to take her instead of the US marine falsely accused of spying

[@redneckson]

why would they swap? they gave the useless woman back, got their dude and keep the patriot. everything went wrong, woke solution

[@CidVeldoril]

@@redneckson Even if the Russians would swap, I doubt even the US would be evil enough to actually give their own citizens to their "enemy".

[@Gjallahad]

Fucking lmao, the Innocent 'Patriot' was a fucking CIA spy lets at least be honest for it, if you mean the marine, yet still trash trade for the Us true.

[@zacharymesimer9441]

The honorable Judge Dankie has blessed us with his verdict of a Russian arms dealer! Rejoice! 🎉🎉🎉

[@squalosus223]

0:30 Guns, like knives are incredibly effective tools. It dismays me to see a tool that helped humans defy nature itself, be villified by psychopaths using them to senselessly snuff out innocent lives.

[@lred1383]

eh, i wouldn't equate the two. Knives are tools first and weapons second, and the only purposes for guns that don't involve killing people are killing animals and target shooting, it's a weapon through and through

[@Ekdrink]

⁠​⁠@@lred1383the first thing we did with stone knives was attach them to a spear and throw them at animals. At humans was second. Knives are only not seen as weapons in America where we have guns.

[@combativeThinker]

@@lred1383 Fool.

[@Lorrieboi]

At 13 yo he already brought so much more to this world that Brittany Griner EVER could

[@carsoncasmirri3874]

10:08 DEATH TO THE MPLA!!! I may have had too much fun with Black Ops 2 because that is my first reaction any time the MPLA is mentioned

[@jimthethug7119]

Count dankula: "and of course modern warfare" Me: "i thought you already said video games?"

[@jimmyanderson3700]

Keep up the great work. Thank you for all the laugh you have given me.

[@raumograeywolf5477]

He learned Farsi, and Esperanto, at 12? I am impressed and kinda like him already. As something of a language nerd cut from the same cloth as JRR Tolkien.

[@jswets5007]

Her crime wasn't what she was carrying. Her crime was being stupid enough to carry it where she was.

[@jswets5007]

@@irisjanemay1903 I didn't know and I don't care.

[@MrMarttivainaa]

Lord of War is my favorite Cage movie, I watch it several times a year when I can't think of something to watch. Always a good time.

[@smallestgoober9399]

Love him or hate him, he reminded the world that weapons are here to stay.

[@olivere5497]

10:54 basiclly if you put all your skillpoints into languages you break all diplomacy in the game and win every encounter.

[@goddammitalana]

Maybe that's how he got traded for a subpar wnba player

[@olivere5497]

@@goddammitalana druggie lives matter!

[@MassiveKittenFire-vw1cw]

Female accountants raise 40% of the madlads in this series, I swear

[@RMLK]

I see dank I click like It’s a simple fucking concept

[@Saint_7734]

I wouldn’t be surprised if part of the reason we made the atrocious prison exchange involving this guy was so that we could take advantage of his services in future conflicts (ie Ukraine-Russia war and The Other One)

[@bickyboo7789]

I wouldn't be surprised. Gotta keep the war machine well oiled.

[@Agiranto]

I met him last year. Pretty chill dude.

[@frankejolin4615]

No effing way Ur kiding right?

[@donnie7693]

It is always fun watching a leprechaun explain his weird dreams to me

[@jonsmith2061]

Belgium "We can't sell FN Herstal products in Africa, because Victor has flooded the market with cheap weapons".

[@ronly_driver]

*Video Barely Starts* Dank: "GUNS!" KZbin: Aaaaand.... Demonitised!

[@chadisbister1227]

A fresh dank to fall asleep to. Not that I mind listening to the same ones over and over every night. Something about this wild Scotsman regaling tales of mad lads that sends me off to sleep perfectly. Thank you dank 💤

[@1milliondogs]

Does anyone find the timing of him being released/traded a bit bloody convenient, bearing in mind the Russia/Ukraine conflict?

[@nobodynoone2500]

Shhh! Stop noticing things!

[@twinphalanx4465]

Pine or mahogany?

[@w4tt58]

Hope ye can swim mate. Because what may happen won't be bewts on tha grawnd.

[@75skyloftmexican]

Fellas, it was nice knowing this anon. 🫡🫡

[@mistapimpsta2033]

What’s he gonna do? Sell weapons with the help of contacts who are dead or in jail? Exploit systems that have changed significantly since he got locked up? While every law enforcement agency on the planet knows his face, voice, fingerprints, and DNA?

[@russellsmith3567]

His time in Liberia in the middle 1990's must have been interesting. Making deals with General Buttnaked would have been fun

[@Twelvegage30]

Far Cry:2 the Jackal tapes. Oluwagembi: Where do you get the weapons? Jackal: It's a romantic notion that they all came out of the Soviet Union after the collapse; that was a windfall back in '89, maybe through '91... but that's all over. I move weapons, I profit from circulation; you get a ceasefire in Liberia, both sides disarm, you think they slag two thousand tons of guns? No. They sell them to me. I resell them wherever the next war is starting. Oluwagembi: Those are Soviet guns from 1989? Jackal: Hm... That's about half. The rest mostly come from old European armies after they abandoned their colonies in the '60s and '70s, you know, French guns, Dutch, Belgian... Oluwagembi: So, some of these guns are very old? They have been sold, bought, and sold repeatedly? Jackal: (laughs) They aren't bio-degradable. Only the dead are bio-degradable.

[@scaniadan2968]

I was thinking exactly that!

[@violenceislife1987]

😂 yes guns can be sold and re sold Anti gunners are cringe

[@Anthem76]

I like the Merchant of Death more than Brittney Grainer and I think he likes America more than Brittney does. Someone should of read Art Of The Deal before making that exchange.

[@DeezN1892]

Why would you like america after all the cia backed revolutions in the third world and it’s hegemonic grip on the entire planet at the expense of its own citizens. I don’t understand this love for the boot

[@michaelborror4399]

Doesn't sound like he's causing too much trouble these days, but as the general public has a tendency to be pretty lame and guillible with admiring people in the comments and in general, and as a blackfooted lionen descendent of thomas jefferson, benjamin franklin, and pocahontas; we like america just fine, but we like jamaica jamaica too? While I like our alkaline water the best, armoring can also be an important and worthwhile endeavor in the wider world and africa and america anyway?

[@KS-PNW]

Oh please, im surprised Trump didn't give him back for nothing. Gotta keep his creditors happy after all.

[@DeezN1892]

@@michaelborror4399 what?

[@jurassicturtle3666]

​@@KS-PNWfound rachel maddow's burner account

[@Nomad_786]

Count Dankula is so good at what he does, I was shocked that he was the dog joke guy a year into consuming his content.

[@drfye]

🤣

[@hraharahra]

You DO know about his song, right? The one with the countries names! It's epic!

[@Nomad_786]

@@hraharahra no?

[@DASRH]

N00b

[@joeybebop]

​@@Nomad_786 Nations of the world. It is truly a modern classic. 👌

[@Sigismund-von-Luxembourg]

The man has the chaddest mustache I have ever seen.

[@gate7clamp]

As an American, I can easily say we have definitely lost our edge

[@theelder4797]

We've been filed down, not quite the same.

[@zacharymcmillan2788]

"Boris the Blade." "You mean...Boris the Bullet Dodger?" - Lennie James and Vinnie Jones - 'Snatch'

[@AlyssaCPA]

autistic here, loving languages to this extent is definitely an archetype for us for a reason

[@goddammitalana]

I feel like certain types of autism can be a legit game breaker if utilized correctly

[@MaxiemumKarnage]

Autist here, the fact there isn't one mandatory universal language is absolutely retarded

[@violenceislife1987]

Yes

[@dongatello6969]

Could have been traded for a Marine but we didn’t want him

[@tacitus6384]

They get back the Merchant of Death, a massive arms dealer, and in exchange we get a whiney basketball player who hates the country that freed her. Best trade deal ever /sarcasm

[@treyjordan3168]

Russia bent Uncle Sam over and didn't even bother to buy dinner

[@LiftandCoa]

I think, in this case, Uncle Sam bend over on free will and actually proposed everything that happened from the start. Literally to gain Twitter points. Russia still didnt buy dinner after finishing and spunking into Sams orifices tho....@@treyjordan3168

[@macedindu829]

It's incredibly funny to me that my government traded this obviously masterful operator for a women's basketball player.

[@posidon50]

The worst trade is the history of trade deals

[@Jekyll_Jackal]

I'm beyond pissed that I graduated from the high school that basketball american was in. That school was their only claim to fame.

[@robkilenstihl5329]

This video will get more views than Brittany Griners entire career.

[@hattimounattimou8258]

who?

[@Hohenstein1871]

Not only is Viktor Bout a mad lad, but he was also played by an mad lad

[@yudhawinter1962]

hey, he went on and won a seat in the Legislative Assembly of Ulyanovsk Oblast in 2023. good luck in catching him next time without starting a war

[@invictus2578]

The funny and fucked up thing about Brittany Greiner getting out of Russia is they left a decorated marine rotting in a Russian prison because Brittany is a part of the rainbow brigade, so yeah great trade

[@alyssarichardson2544]

Not denying her being a lesbian had something to do with it but I think it had more to do with her being a treasonous, America-hating communist, that and she's black. With a profile like that, she could be straight as an arrow. Her being a lesbian was just the icing on the cake...

[@callumrhind1357]

5:16 The best wiki article sub-heading award goes to...

[@joe-redacted]

Viktor "Based" Bout rip his brother, Jared Leto

[@stevehill4615]

You mentioned Viktor Bout was also known as Boris, made me wonder if the character Boris "the blade" Yurinov in the 2000 film "Snatch" was a reference to Viktor.

[@JohnSmith-ud9ex]

The intro sequence to "Lord of War" is, in my mind, one of the all time classics...

[@tacticool_weeb8450]

They made an anime about this dude.. and turned nick cage into a hot anime waifu, Jourmengndr

[@BamBamZ_Gaming]

Funny how a particular government does the exact thing this guy does but somehow they aren't criminals but he is 😂

[@Renone87]

That’s the problem they don’t like competition ££££

[@lolripk]

the fact he got traded for a WNBA player is so wild, I wouldn't even make that trade if it were Lebron James held in the Russian prison

[@frankejolin4615]

Agreed. Personally am woundering when this long ass south park episode will be over

[@dustondoesit3913]

As an American who is attempting to become an arms dealer, this guy really doesn’t seem all too bad. Part of me is glad he’s free, but wish we got an American who actually liked America in exchange.

[@That0Homeless0Guy]

Remember, the US traded a traitorous basket ball player for #2 on the US most wanted list. Secondary to a man they killed with C4, dogs and a military robot. A basketball player for the king of spades......

[@achd5083]

Coming back to this video because Viktor’s back in the arms business and selling to the Houthis

[@ulyssesm.daniels6927]

26:00 or so. The funny thing is that is true for rifles, but shotguns are the reverse, lower number means bigger blast lol.

[@nentendoboy12]

No he's talking about the rear sight on the AK there's a meme about how I think it was Rhodesian security forces during the Bush war, after battles kept finding AKs with the rear sight dialed all the fuck the way up. Basically indirect fire, so they asked a few captured rebels and they had no idea what the rear sight was actually for and they thought putting it on the higher numbers made the rifle shoot harder. That's what he's referencing, not caliber.

[@badgerfool1980]

It turns out the worst place you can actually be arrested as US citizen is one country over buddy, ask Gonzalo Lira.

[@violenceislife1987]

F for Coach Red Pill

[@chiefkeef74]

Lol Coach Dead Pill

[@AnExcellentChef]

coach dead shill lol rip bozo

[@taysondynastyemperor5124]

I feel as much pity for him as I do for the WNBA player in this video (none at all).

[@davidc3793]

Probably the only memorable trade in WNBA history

[@aKjohn8798]

550 million firearms in the entire WORLD and us Americans have 400 million of them

[@SirANK8]

New Mad Lad Nicolas Cage, just 103 minutes of Dank reacting to A Vampires Kiss

[@jegsdinogod5091]

Fun fact about that Lord of war quote.... It's so outdated that America alone has 650 million guns in the civilian market and hands alone. I love my country.

[@bcvetkov8534]

God bless the 2nd Amendment.

[@oz_jones]

Rookie numbers!

[@oz_jones]

Also, im certain the figure was pulled out of someones ass.

[@Borderose]

Holy fuck. Why didn't the US just keep him? The things he can spill. The contacts he can pull. Hell, offer him years off his sentence if he pledges his skills and knowledge in the service of the USA. That was _not_ a good trade.

[@MyTv-]

If he studied Esperanto early in life. It would help him learn other languages. It’s a construed mixed language. With the idea to ease communication cross language barrages. Ironically it was built to promote understanding and peace.

[@petervonfroster8i]

"UUUUH YEAH!"- Macho Man and with that at it again, to my favorite "Show" on the Internet, with yet another Funny Boi!

[@Stuka.B1]

Absolute Mad lads - Roy Benavidez or sir Adrian Carton De Wiart