ADDRESSING CONTROVERSIAL PARENTING TOPICS! | VERY HONEST CONTROVERSIAL PARENTING TAG

#controversialparentingtag #2019controversialparenting #momof4
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This is my VERY HONEST 2019 Controversial Parenting Tag Video. Find out my thoughts on tons on controversial parenting topics: Do we spank? Did we circumcise? Do we vaccinate? Does our toddler have an iPad? Do we co-sleep? How do we discipline our kids? Homeschool? Did we force our kids to conform to stereotypical gender roles? Tantrums in publics? Do we practice pool safety? I hope you enjoy hearing my thoughts on these issues and others. Feel free to respectfully share your own opinions in the comment section below. Thanks for watching and supporting our channel! - XO - Lo
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[@user-bc4es6uq8m]

i agree with most of these but as you said, thinking that your kids will only be with one partner in their entire lives, is VERY naive.

[@tallyakuzmin6390]

My husband and I were both each others only partners

[@forest_green]

Agreed. And even if your child is well educated on abstinence, and stays with the same partner for life, they're still at risk of being assaulted. I can't imagine how horrific if one of my daughters got cancer from a sexual partner or rape.

[@LovelyMarvelous]

It's really refreshing to hear a mom admit that they regret a parenting decision they made or admit that they might not be 100% sure about something. I feel like so many moms think their way is the right way and are closed-minded. You don't see a lot of moms admitting they might be wrong.

[@pinkafterblue]

Thanks for taking the time to leave this comment, Katie. I try to be as real as possible - there’s many things I’m confident in, but there are many things I’m not as well. Part II is going up tomorrow if you’d be interested in seeing it.

[@ninamariamedium]

I don't know why any topic is controversial. Parents can raise their children however they see fit. As long as your children are happy, healthy, and thriving then you're doing a great job. Great video.

[@Henry_Smith_862]

how many body parts am i allowed to cut off?

[@marclabrie6027]

I agree nina brown

[@marclabrie6027]

@@Henry_Smith_862 nothing wrong with circumcision

[@Henry_Smith_862]

@@marclabrie6027 there is something wrong with forcing it on a person who is healthy and did not consent.

[@sarah_Docenko]

The fact that your having a 5th baby is controversial these days! We are having our 4th in June and people think we are insane. Our kids are 6,4 and 2. When I grew up(I'm 31) I always wanted 4 kids close together for sure but it was more "normal" then. Now it seems more and more couples stop at 1 or 2 kids and 3 seems to be considered A LOT.

[@pinkafterblue]

Haha you’re so right! I grew up an only child and despised it. My husband had a big family, and I’m so thankful we were about to have our children and were able to support them. 💕 With that being said, 5 is all she wrote for us 🤣

[@pinkafterblue]

And we’re the same age 👯‍♀️

[@sarah_Docenko]

My husband wants 5 kids but I'm on the fence! We'll see how I feel in 2 years. Haha! It will probably be a boy since we are having our 3rd boy in a row. At this point I'm surprised we even had a daughter....maybe its a good thing she's the oldest 😂

[@pinkafterblue]

We had three boys in a row as well. We then got pregnant with at least two girls that we know for sure, but we lost one in the second trimester.

[@sarah_Docenko]

Ughh! I couldn't imagine! 😥❤

[@MaryssaAlbert]

Love this! Raise your babies however you want! You're amazing, and your 4 (soon to be 5) babies are SO lucky to have you!

[@pinkafterblue]

Aww, thanks, Maryssa 💕 Sometimes I try 💁🏼‍♀️

[@zzevonplant]

Hey! Just wanted to let you know (in case you don't know already), the DockATot is a pretty big suffocation hazard. So it's not really safe for babies to sleep in them when the parent(s) are asleep and no one is able to supervise the baby. Not telling you what to do, just want you to be aware. I wouldn't do it myself, but your parenting decisions are yours to make.

[@jennybiddle-smiley7173]

I support anyone decision in not washing new clothes. I have to say though I’ve worked retail for many years in the past. Everyone should wash new clothes before using them not just for babies, because well people can be be disgusting. Saying this only with love and in the end to each their own, blessings to all, you do you boo.

[@TaliyahMC]

As a NICU nurse we ask all parents to wash new clothing before bringing it for baby...there are a lot of chemicals even in baby clothing (not tried on in the store)...I had no idea on this until just recently....

[@mommarae10]

I had my first son circumcised even though my motherly instinct told me not too. When I found out my second baby was a boy I planned on circumcising him too because I wanted him to "match" his brother and dad. I made the appointment and then started crying uncontrollably. Everything in me was telling not to do it. I started researching and came across a video of the procedure on KZbin. It was an instructional videos for doctors so the procedure was done perfectly. The baby got the local anesthetic but judging by the was he scremed throughout the entire procedure he felt everything. It was HORRIFIC. No doubt what I had just witnessed was torture. I showed the video to my husband when he got home and he suggested that his mom go in with our son to have the procedure done. I said "absolutely not, if we're going to put him through this then we owe it to him for at least one of us to be with him but it sure isn't going to be me". To which he replied, "well I cant watch that". So that was it, he wasnt circumcised. It's something that we've explained to our boys (now 4 and 8) as one of you had an operation when you were a baby and one of you didn't. I've never had a problem with infections or uti either. I did however have problems with adhesions in my oldest son. I am very much against genital cutting of boys or girls. People should be able to chose for themselves when they are old enough if they want to permanently alter their bodies.

[@pipermeloche7915]

I agree with everything except you're opinions on the hpv/gardasil vaccine. A lot of older studies were unsure about its efficacy because it was so new but new research shows it has been incredibly effective for cervical cancer prevention (American academy of pediatrics, August 2018). And it's still possible to contract HPV even if your kids will only be with one person (CDC). The KZbin channel healthcare triage (which is run by a phenomenal pediatrician specializing in hpv prevention) has many great videos on the topic. I hope this doesnt come off as know it all, but I wanted to include sources because it seems like you are someone who values research. I know how hard these decisions are and this is not me trying to shame you but rather offering you some research you may not have been aware of.

[@ling2555]

I try not to judge other moms but I’ve seen babies that aren’t even one yet forward facing and it just makes me cringe! It’s so hard to not judge a little in that situation because it’s EXTREMELY unsafe.

[@ashleybroussard178]

Ling I’ve seen moms forward face babies in infant seats. It makes me so worried for the little baby. 😟

[@TheOhLeahChronicles]

My son has thrown ONE tantrum in the store when he was 3, and he will be 5 soon and still remembers it. We can be walking and he will be like "Hey mom, remember when I threw a tantrum? Yeah that wasn't good..." I legit took what he had, put it back in the correct spot (5 aisles away) all while holding his hand and I paid, walked out of the store, buckled him in, and drove home all without saying a word to him. I ignored him entirely until we got home and I think the ignoring thing was good for my son personally because it gave him time to calm himself a bit, also while wondering how the hell I was going to react lol, and it also allowed me time to process how I wanted to handle the situation. But, it was his first and only tantrum in public.

[@KatCraig]

I'm sorry for what you went through with your miscarriages. I can't believe there is even controversial parenting topics... Why can't everyone just support our own decisions and actions.

[@kaydra26]

Wow, you are Mom goals! I agree 100% with the rear facing views, my son is only 6 months right now and I’m planning to get the Diono Rainer so he can rear face as long as possible (after he outgrows his infant carrier) I love your non judgmental, non preachy but very honest views on every topic, great video!

[@ashtonpaige]

I had 3 under 3 and we had all of the babies in Dino car seats in a Dodge Charger. Lol you just took me back to those days.

[@ashtonpaige]

I’d like to know your opinion on winning and loosing for sports,games, ect. Should we be all winners? Do you believe in participation awards?

[@TheNewMomClarissa]

You seem really good with discipline! Having a two year old, I feel like I’m always struggling with discipline! Your face after you said you will be circumcising Cruise 😂 we left my boys intact. I did this video years ago, I don’t think I could do it again though, everyone is so judgy these days 🙄 You’re brave!

[@pinkafterblue]

I think it helps that I have a degree in early childhood education, am a teacher, and worked as an ABA therapist with solid experience using research-based reinforcement techniques to be brave enough to do this. As my kids get older and I realize they’re actually good little people with friends and independently-generated kind thoughts, and I somehow have managed to not have entitled little monsters thus far, I could care less what naysayers say. I have confidence in our parenting after I’ve seen my kids grow into themselves a little bit 💕 I don’t know that I would have had the confidence to do it and be so open and honest when my oldest kids were babies.

[@Carolegavinriley]

Great parenting on the way your boys earned their phones!

[@serobinson1]

The car seat thing is so funny now to me. When my almost 18 year old was born 12 months was totally normal, some doctors even 9 months. They didn’t even make seats that did it that long! He was to big for a booster by like 4( he’s 6 ft 4, 300 lbs now). My youngest 2(6&7) just got out of a 5 point! So funny how things change . My husband was very firm in not doing our daughters ears until she could ask , and she asked at 6. Luckily her ears healed perfectly . And she went with me and her grandmother so it was not a bad experience. However my mom did mine at 6 weeks .

[@lexdosch180]

You were like “there’s research for this side, and that side” and never got hostile and nasty and I just want to say THANK YOU. I enjoyed this video and was skeptical when I clicked because most people (almost all) that I’ve encountered about controversial topics are sooo hateful if you don’t agree with them. It was refreshing to hear your decisions, why you chose them, and that you just think whatever a parent does is their choice. Much love 💗

[@pinkafterblue]

+Lex Fish thank you so much for the sweet comment. Live & let live!

[@adasollystyling]

Yes I did cry out method and it gave my babies a routine and a better sleep pattern. Yes allowance is good. Co sleeping is ok with me. When I was young my mother would never allow us to have any more than an hour of tv a day. I was a bit more relaxed but when my children were young I did limit the tv to children’s educational programs . We all just have to have our babies the way it is safer. I was a mother who had really easy births from 4 hours with the first and the last baby two hours. I was a bit worried about vaccines. I had a cousin who was so sick after her needles as a baby with a high temperature and she screamed for hours. Ear piercing looks so cute on babies. I was a breast feeder all the way. Car safety was different when I had my kids years ago. I would probably be your mums age but I love to watch family vlogs and I am really enjoying your family. You are a great mum so thank you for sharing your beautiful family.

[@ncp6363]

I stop counting at 2... But theres a huge difference between a 12 month vs 23 month old. So I count months till 2.

[@pinkafterblue]

Makes sense.

[@chelsealittle8461]

Had to discipline my daughter at the grocery store and then when she threw a tantrum I ignored her and 2 weeks later a lady came into where I worked and told me that she was there and high fives me on how I handled it lol at first I felt embarrassed but then I realized that's what my daughter needed at that time!

[@xowestcoast]

What age did you switch their carseats? My son just turned 1 and is big enough for one of the multistage carseat but I'm nervous to make the switch bc he ALWAYS falls asleep in the car

[@christy8069]

Absolutely love your answers! Especially on ignoring tantrums..

[@kylarunyan1048]

My mom would pinch our arms if we acted up in public.

[@maryly2688]

I agree with most of your opinions and I think how you use spanning is right but I think that this information needs to be known. For school I did a project on physical discipline and spanking and it was found that it was not nearly as affective as other types of discipline. They found that spanking stops the child from doing the specific thing but they don’t understand the reasoning. If a kid was spanked because they said something rude to there mom, they often didn’t understand that it was also wrong to say something rude to there brother. I also learned that kids who are spanked are much less likely to apply logic or reasoning to problems and aren’t good at communicating what they think/feel. That being said, I think that if you have explained why what they did is wrong and a behavior is repeated over and over, spanking can be a last resort up to a certain age.

[@mrssgen]

New York is trying to make HPV a mandatory vaccination for school now and I don’t want my son to have it 😭

[@serobinson1]

I 100% agree with allowance . If you never do allowance I feel like it’s hard for kids to understand money . The friends house I am not ok with it very much. My oldest was around 10 years old but now working in a prison and seeing the cases, my younger 2 will be lucky if they go before 15. With vaccinations my oldest had them normal, and my younger 2 did a delayed / spread out s because . So I just wouldn’t do like 5 at once

[@taylorgivens1525]

I really appreciate your video, however, when referring to co-sleeping please specify. Because, co-sleeping is a broad term, it alludes to three things: room sharing, bed sharing (which is what you were referring to), and by the bed sleeping (bassinet). Co-sleeping (as it can be one of the three) isn’t dangerous, bed-sharing is the only form that can potentially cause harm.

[@Henry_Smith_862]

I can hear the pain and sadness in your voice. The fact the you tear up talking about circumcision and you still cannot end the cycle of abuse is deeply sad. Having a penis does not give you the right to cut off parts of another person's body. Please protect your baby. Circumcision is a lifetime of loss forced on a healthy child, it is not necessary and can be stopped.

[@nothingpenguin7576]

Exactly.

[@marclabrie6027]

Wrong

[@shimrsparklshine]

Okay chores are great for kids to make money; however, cleaning their room and doing laundry and putting their dishes after eating and making their lunches shouldn't be "chores" they should be Habits that are built into a routine.

[@pinkafterblue]

Those aren’t their chores. Not sure who you were leaving this advice for.

[@MetroStationluver18]

So my sister Jenna is the last sibling I have and the youngest out of the 5 of us. So close to being similar.

[@serobinson1]

3rd comment lol as weird as some might think you loss of privileges might be, that pretty much sums up prison. Which I work in a prison and honestly, it’s not a bad way to do it. Because in real adult life if you break the rules that’s where you end up Edit to add : I hope this isn’t taken in a bad way, I generally think it’s a great idea.

[@hadassahgrace5]

I don’t think I had out is always bad but I think if I adopted her had a foster child I would have a harder time using the car I don’t message just because of the trauma thing and because a lot of kids in the situation to experience the extinction from her cry it out rather than the caring parenting form

[@danielagloria134]

My old account got deleted :( but loved the video 💕👌🏽

[@CriticalRelativist]

Your story about circumcision made me so sad. :( Wish your husband was able to get over his (what I firmly believe) is an irrational desire to have his children match him. It's ego, and I don't support that.. so sad that he's putting you through the torture as well, just to satisfy himself.

[@pinkafterblue]

I respect your opinions but, to be honest & if you care to know, I don’t think he possesses a desire for them to be like him - I think he believes they would prefer that for themselves in the long run done before they could remember the procedure.

[@tiffanyzeschke6213]

@@pinkafterblue Dont you think instead of guessing what they might like to like oh i dont know... let them choose when they are 18 . The procedure isnt bad if under local anesthesia. That way your kid has his body and can make his own choice. you should check out your whole baby . org. Your kid was born perfect no alterations needed

[@mostump1362]

Tiffany Hart It’s awesome you have an opinion, and I’m sure you’ve backed in up in your own parenting. But their choice as parents is in no way detrimental to their child’s wellbeing. Therefore, although I’m sure she welcomes opinions, being condescending and rude regarding their decision as parents is unnecessary.

[@tiffanyzeschke6213]

@@mostump1362 ek you see i beleive it is a personal opinon up to the person it belongs to. Aka his penis should be his penis. Cosmetic surgerys should not be parents

[@CriticalRelativist]

@@mostump1362 - "But their choice as parents is in no way detrimental to their child’s wellbeing." Could I ask what other healthy, sensitive body part could parents choose to remove from their children and have you respond in the same way? Why is the foreskin a free pass, but no other body part?

[@aliciaalvarez118]

New subscriber ☺️ doing this video today on my channel that’s how I found you lol but I liked this video (:

[@kylarunyan1048]

My aunt had six babies and her last one was breach my mom said she didn't even look pregnant at 9 months

[@kylarunyan1048]

And she was born natural

[@kaleykirkpatrick427]

Definitely parents make the best decisions for their own kids. When the topic of circumcision came up for my son I went back and worth on what I wanted for my son, so I had talked with my ob and his (pending) pediatrician and they made a good point that if you are unsure then if the dad is then do it for their son as they help potty train and questions won’t be raised why it’s different. But coming time to when Tobias was born he was premature and he was two little to be circumcised so he didn’t have it done until he was two months old. I don’t think there is a right or a wrong way but what’s right for the family and that child. I applaud you for sharing your side of parenting as it’s not easy when everyone seems to judge these days 💕

[@Legal.Knievel]

It's safer to wear things second hand without washing them because chances are that they have been washed (such as from Once Upon a Child, it's a requirement). Clothes (new) in the store are sprayed/treated with all kinds of preservatives and come into contact with god knows what.

[@pinkafterblue]

Thanks for sharing. You’re probably right 🤦🏼‍♀️

[@tallyakuzmin6390]

I had 2 breech babies in a row, delivered them both vaginally with no problems and relatively short labors

[@pinkafterblue]

Unfortunately their presentation and my uterine condition didn’t allow me that option safely 😢

[@rebeccaplank9013]

This was a great video!

[@pinkafterblue]

Thanks for watching, Rebecca 💕

[@sarahuebersax4415]

I feel sorry for you, because you let your husband decide about the circumcision... the whole match the look thing is so weird in my eyes... You dont get a tatoo for your babys to match you... why cut an imortant part of their genitals of? Foreskin has functions... research regret mums... you will find a lot of great information there... I am european, Swiss and almost nobody is circumcised here... only jews and muslims do it because of their religious beliefs...

[@Maeve2001]

Get your children off the iPads 🤬🤬🤬🤬

[@marclabrie6027]

Allowance ok Circumcision ok for boys safer and cleaner and less likely to get infected Electronic devices not necessary at baby age or toddler age Nothing wrong with sleeping over at friends house Vaccinate ok Fence is law for pool Nothing wrong with ear piercings Breastfeeding ok as formula ok Spanking is ok nothing wrong with it works for some doesnt work for some

[@Jane-qg6sj]

Circumcision is not safer or cleaner. Those are myths. Circumcision only decreases infection rate by .001%. Not only that, infections in males can be treated with antibiotics, same as females. Intact penises are actually easier to clean - you clean what you can see, like a finger. That's it.

[@marcuscarcus159]

Imagine being this delusional.

[@marclabrie6027]

@@Jane-qg6sj untrue

[@Jane-qg6sj]

"Myth - Circumcising newborn baby boys produces health benefits later in life. Fact - There is NO link between circumcision and better health. In fact, cutting a baby boy's genitals creates immediate health risks. The foreskin is actually an important and functional body part, protecting the head of the penis from injury and providing moisture and lubrication. Circumcision also diminishes sexual pleasure later in life."

[@Jane-qg6sj]

"Myth - Male circumcision helps prevent HIV. Fact - Claims that circumcision prevents HIV have repeatedly been proven to be exaggerated or false. Only abstinence or safe sex, including the use of condoms, can prevent the spread of sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV/AIDS."