Semester 1 Narrative Writing Exam (3) درس + امتحان مع التصحيح

[@redaff882]

You're explain is so good keep going 🙏

[@sarabelmaati5489]

Goodluck for u r book pain and pleasure👍👍👍👍.. we are proud of u teacher .u r a good example of an ambitious young man

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Thanks a lot dear Sara, I appreciate that a lot. Wish you a bright future ;)

[@sarabelmaati5489]

@@AhmedElrhazi I wish I all the best wishes 👍

[@صندوقالمعرفة-ه6د]

thank you for your guiding lessons Keep going Sir ❤👍

[@lamyaarrai9513]

narrative paragraph My strenuous efforts were ultimately going to be coronated in that serenely cheerful day. It was my graduation day which i had patiently devoted for my sleep and ruthless diligence. I woke up earlier than usual in that remarkable day. I wore my graduation suit which profoundly seeded a mixture feelings of delight and glory that made me feel like a bird which had just sat free after years of emprisonment . My eyes breamed with tears once i saw the proud glances of my parents who had always kept pushing me forward to triumph over all stumbling blocks that faced me throughout my scholarly trajectory. My father was supposed to drive me to university that day. On our way, i set my soul and my hands free from the car window to sense the refreshing air while closing my ambitiously sparkling eyes ; it was indeed a moment of a wornout warrior. I suddenly had odd feeling once i sensed the slowing down the car speed. It was horribly rueful feeling once i learnt that the car had actually broke down. i was crestfallen since i knew i would be late for the graduation party, so i eventually bursted into tears. After few moments of apprehension and gloomy atmosphere, a car stopped to us. Luckily, it was best friend father's car. My tormented soul had finally soothed, and we went on to my solemn venerable coronation.

[@sarranafizi8335]

you helped me a lot Sir, thank you so much

[@AhmedElrhazi]

You Most welcome

[@amjedjassam2375]

اريد ان احصل على الملزمة او الملخص الذي تشرح فيه اذا ممكن

[@xrfox1634]

Thanks for the video, teacher!

[@AhmedElrhazi]

You are welcome!

[@sick-head3770]

thanks man keep up the good work

[@bidarnoor6878]

جزاك الله خيرا

[@AhmedElrhazi]

بارك الله فيــك

[@jihanmisbah92]

Excellent work

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Many thanks

[@halaabdel-hlim2445]

يعيشك .

[@alabillagonja5623]

But shouldn't we start the paragraph with the topic sentence which includes the topic, the controlling idea, and the point of the story?

[@AhmedElrhazi]

You should. The topic sentence, just to let you know, can be in the beg and in the middle and in the end...Put me in context of your question

[@hasnacharia6398]

شكرا بزااااف

[@redalaila780]

شكرًا جزيلا

[@wweforever6342]

with all do respect M.R ahmad but it does not seems to me that have restated the topic sentence.

[@AhmedElrhazi]

f Narattive writing machi darouri dir restating. You can Just give a general opintion about the story and it will be considered correct and ACCEPTABLE.

[@cloudy3183]

Thank you so much 🙌💖

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Glad it was helpful, Kholoud

[@nihalamahfouf5581]

Thanks alot, wach machi darori ndiro firstly, in addition, moreover, finally, f narrative n3wdohom ghi b after that later...

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Ila t9edri tketbi in a creative way omate7tajihomch rah not necessary. But if you use them that is also good :) machi darouri t3wdihom t9edri tkhdmihom bjouj ri matktrich menhom :) . Thanks for the comment

[@Smailenglish]

Thanks a lot bro💚💚

[@chimi8911]

حبذا لو ارفقت الفيديوهات بامتحانات pdfفي صندوق الوصف

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Chai mae لا يمكن ارفاقهم عن طريق ويتوب ...سأحاول فيما بعد رفعهم على موقع اخر... Thanks for your remark.

[@Makeithappen99-99]

حاول ديرهم فموقع خاص بالقناة وحط الرابط فالديسكريبشن راه مفيهاش انتهاك لقانون اليوتيوب... وإذا كانو ديالك راه أفضل شكرا لك 👍

[@chimi8911]

tnanks

[@noonecares3213]

Good job! such a good paragraph Yet I think u totally deviated from the topic, u didn't stick to the TS. U completely focused on describing and giving unimportant details on things which are irrelevent to the required question, Instead of elaborating on the topic. Thanks 3awntiiina bzf ♡

[@AhmedElrhazi]

No one cares Khoya I wrote the paragraph creatively and and the details you say are irrelevant for me they're not since the serve the purpose of narrative writing. Thanks for your comment خد الإيجابي من الدرس اخي

[@noonecares3213]

layjazik bikhir 😊 I really appreciate having a creative teacher like you. chokran 👌

[@ayoubakherraz2205]

thanks

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Welcome

[@fatimadjj3392]

3afak sahah liya had writing teacher

[@AhmedElrhazi]

I already did ;)

[@stepup6607]

Khoya wakha twli t9ad maa3 f les videos ta3ek rah tankhdmo b pc tansm3o ghire bzzaz

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Med Malik Khoya mafhmtkch, ach lmetloub?

[@stepup6607]

@@AhmedElrhazi khoya gha sawt na9s shwiya

[@fatimadjj3392]

Iwould like to tell you about a special day in my life.On Sunday ,14January.Iwas stay at hom with my parents and my sisters .Suddenly,My uncle knocked on the door .My sister opened it.All my family are met for surprise me about travel to Paris.Iwas very happy and I started to dance ,when I hear a good news.Because,travel in Paris it was my dream.My uncle give me a nice gifte for don't forget him. My travel in Paris was a special day in all my life ,I don't forget it never

[@AhmedElrhazi]

I would like to tell you about a special day in my life. On Sunday , January 14, I was stay at home with my parents and my sisters .Suddenly, my uncle knocked on the door. ONE OF MY SISTERS opened it. All my family WERE MET WITH A SURPRISE . He SAID I WOULD TRAVEL TO PARIS. I was very happy and I started to dance when I heard THIS good news BECAUSE TRAVELING TO PARIS WAS MY DREAM. My uncle GAVE me a nice GIFT IN ORDER NOT TO forget him. My traveling TO Paris was a special EVENT in all my life. I WILL NEVER forget it.

[@dontlosehope4964]

Goli wash haka katktab lparagraph khoya lah uhafdeek Rani talf ma3rftsh mnin nbda The homelessness Topic sentence : The homelessness issue has grown up so quickly in the world Supporting details 1 : A lot of people under poverty line Supporting details 2 : The obstacles that the homeless face The homelessness issue has grown up so quickly in the world. At the beginning, there is a lot of people under poverty line, they don't have the ability to buy or rent a house, so that will lead them to live in public places, in addition, homeless have to beg for money and getting some things to eat, even though most of people ignoring them, due to sometimes they get insulted. Some of the citizens consider them as a burden on society. More over they have to go to shelters or streets, sometimes charities provide them with residence and food. But there is not enough charities to help all of them. Overly the homeless person has many problems in his life in include them he’s threatened to die sooner or later with an awful way.

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Homelessness has grown up so quickly in the world. First, there are a lot of people under poverty line. They don't have the ability to buy or rent a house, so as a result they live in public places. In addition to that, homeless people have to beg for money to buy food. Most people ignore them, and sometimes they even insult them. Some citizens consider them as a burden on society. Moreover, they have to go to shelters or streets. Sometimes charitable companies provide them with residence and food. But there is not enough of them to help all homeless people. Overly the homeless has many problems in their life, and they are threatened to die sooner or later in an awful way.

[@AhmedElrhazi]

WORK ON VOCABULARY AND YOUR WRITING

[@dontlosehope4964]

@@AhmedElrhazi thank you very much my respect to you bro ❤️❤️

[@ahlamlemrabet372]

Wach n9dar nktb paragraph hna otsahah hali please answer me teacher?

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Sure Ahlam...Leave it in a comment

[@ahlamlemrabet372]

Oky thank u so much

[@ahlamlemrabet372]

" a special day in my life " Sunday 3 March 2020 was a special day in my life . It was really a wonderful day ,& it was going to be my first plan trip with my family after all the fatigue from work and study . So i was really excited , because it was the first time i was in an airplane . Acually , this was my dream since child hood . At this day i was scared to travel by airplan,but , the same time it was my dream . In that day i waked up early to prepare to travel . I woke up and prayed first because prayer is the most important thing for me , then i had wear my clothes and i took all the bags to the car . After this we had eat the breakfast , and we hug my grand father who stayed at home because she is sick . In addition we got into the car heading to the airport , it was a very nice flight on the plan for the first time . So that day was very special to me .

[@ahlamlemrabet372]

3afak 9olii hta wach ktabthaa mzyanna 3la nn o smahli bzaf

[@ahlamlemrabet372]

@@AhmedElrhazi ? Plzz answer me

[@Foxmarocsport]

CURSED MORNING That's how a dog can ruin your Monday? After having a great weekend with my family outside the city, I was up to a great beginning in school. I was full of joy, enthusiasm, and ready to go .At least, that is what I thought. Next morning, I was about to learn an unforgettable lesson in my life. It was a beautiful morning. I already arranged my school bag. I took my breakfast, and I headed out to school. After I have closed the door, I came across a hug black dog sitting on the doormat of the house.I waved my hands over and over to make him go."that was useless", I said. It was strangely staring at me.Therefore,I decided to grab a rock and to shoot him. After a while, he looked at me,and it turned away slowly, as nothing has happened. I had to be hurry because I wouldn't be missing the English exam that morning. I looked back again for the dog;it was gone. I was waiting at the bus station for a long time. Then, I figured out later that the bus is in strike that day. That was the first time that happens since they constantly reserve a bus for the students. So, running against the clock was my only option to school. In the middle of my racing, I remembered that I haven't brought my identity card.Hence, I immediately stopped. I felt clumsy, ignorant, and stupid. i've turned around,breathed a big amount of air,and another round has began. In my way back, I've weirdly thought about the dog that I've met earlier. Which possibly cursed me and made my day upside-down,probably due to my hit. I didn't fully believe this stories; they were always superstitions and foolishness for me. When I get back home, I was completely exhausted and sweated. I took my Identity card, slimed the door, went back to school. That was one of my baddest Mondays ever happened to me for sure. From that day on, i've learnt to never hit any dog whatever its color is. Moreover, I have to never underestimate any of other beliefs.

[@AhmedElrhazi]

Well, I didn't care much about the mistakes in your essay because I was flown with the story :) It was nice narrative. You can improve it to have a really nice short story . Major mistakes: TENSES (Stick to one tense, usually the past, and don't keep mixing present perfect with the past since you are narrating a soty. There are some spelling mistakes too. Always check your words before using them. We never start a sentence this way: Which possibly cursed... (I mean which..) Try to revise run-on sentence... Anyway; it is a good attempt you have done man. Good Job !

[@Foxmarocsport]

Thank you.

[@posneramiir2871]

I would be happy to tell you about my room. I am living in Ifrane. My house specifically is in a location, against two karakas in our street behind the post office and in front of the police station. I don't have my own room, I share it with my brother. Our room is in the top left corner of the floor between our sisters' room and our parents' room, in front of the stairs. The door and the window of my room are painted in black and the walls are painted in green. In the left corner, there is a bed next to the window that shows the police station. There is a calendar above the dresser. On the right of the door, there is a trash can. Next to my bed, there is a brown carpet on the floor and there is a picture of myself above my bed on the wall. I am not happy that I don't have my own room. please, could you give me a grade?

[@AhmedElrhazi]

I would be happy to tell you about my room. (This your topic sentence and you immendiately mention where you live and didn't give details to develop the topi sentenece) I am living in Ifrane. My house is in a STANDS against two karakas in our street behind the post office and in front of the police station. I don't have my own room, I share it with my brother. Our room is in the top left corner of the floor(= I didn't understand the top left corner of the floor) between our sisters' room and our parents' room, in front of the stairs. The door and the window of my room are painted black and the walls are painted green. In the left corner OF THE ROOM, there is a bed next to the window that OVERLOOKS the police station. There is a calendar above the dresser. On the right of the door, there is a trash can. Next to my bed, there is a brown carpet on the floor and there is a picture of myself above my bed on the wall. I am not happy BECAUSE I don't have my own room. ---Edit it first