AITA for telling my wife she DOESN'T contribute!?

[@MrsWellner]

I'm a 43 year old daughter.... and an only child... I NEVER would have invited myself to my parents' house for DINNER, let alone their freaking VACATION!!!!!

[@cmonson1]

Someone needs to tell Jane to GROWUP! lol and her husband is bum. No self respecting man would let his wife do that.

[@maryanntrammell1952]

I'm a stay at home mom and my husband works and covers all expenses yet he always thanks me for contributing with keeping house clean and taking care of our kids❤

[@Jack-M1113]

See that's normal though and totally fine, if the man makes all the money and the woman does literally nothing at home that's different lol

[@grantpowell4135]

Literally me and my wifey lol

[@withcharmtospare]

Yep, something I will never understand is the breadwinner wanting to pull this score keeping bs. Guarantee if they hit a snag and no longer made that much they wouldn’t want the fucking ledger hounding them every moment. Money is not the most important way to contribute to family and home life.

[@sweetwentworth]

Your profile picture say something different.

[@Aloysius_OHare]

The wife in that story is so ungrateful for her husband. Like her getting instantly suspicious of him makes me suspicious of her.

[@infin8ee]

Everyone needs to have their own space/time. Living in each other's pocket and being jealous is a great way to drive your relationship into a ditch.

[@victoriawilliams2786]

@21:20 Husband deserve alone time, just like everyone else. Maybe he should tell his wife something to the effect of "You don't come to work with me normally so there is no reason for you to come to work with me on a BUSINESS trip."

[@cnnelsonnn]

I can relate to the vacation story. I scheduled a small weekend getaway for me and my wife because we hadn't been on a vacation by ourselves since 2016. I paid my mom to watch the kids so me and my wife could have some alone time. The day before the trip my wife kept asking if we could just let my parents come and bring the kids so they could see some christmas lights. I told her that the reason i scheduled this was for us to get away. She asked over 500 times and finally i gave in and said invite them if thats what you want. My parents said it would be like the kids werent even there, they would stay down stairs. Needless to say, my wife and i did NOT get alone time and we definitely knew the kids were there. Next time i know to just say no and stick to it.

[@ChAoS12388]

I’ve been watching you two for a couple years now and this was one of the best videos I can remember. They are all “dynamite”, but seeing your own opinions and interactions as you figure out AITA was a breath of fresh air. It’s comforting to see normal people with morals and values in this world.

[@Mashy8722]

Broooo the girl that’s been broken up with her ex for 6 yrs and is keeping his life insurance policy money is diabolical!!!! I can assure you he probably didn’t even think about it, especially being sick, that prolly was the last thing on his mind. It was not a “gift” he was tryna give to her, especially if they didn’t even have contact for YEARS. My conscience would never let me do something like that lol I would feel awful. Especially knowing his mother is still alive AND he had another partner too!! She’s absolutely delusional if she thinks that was in any way intentional smfh

[@CatMom03]

I just found r/regretfulparent and it is so sad. My husband and I have no kids, but I can't imagine writing on a website saying how much I hate my own kids/I wish I never had kids. Truly disturbing and heartbreaking.

[@jesclifford88]

Oh wow that’s a thing 😢 if they feel that deeply about it to voice their thoughts online…you’d think they’d give their kids a chance at a better life with people that love them but I’ll bet they won’t.

[@neillundgren6699]

the mullet is coming along nicely! it peeks out of your hat perfectly

[@RacinJasonM3]

Travel guy is NTA! I used to travel 100% and stopped when I had a family. I still travel from time to time and I would never bring my family! Business trips are ALL business, no time to play around!

[@74rocktiger74]

I've brought my wife on two and it kinda sucks because it's a vacation for them and work for you. I'm in the office from 9-5 and she's on the beach. All you wanna do is leave and join them.

[@WhatTheWHAT524]

AGREED!!! This may sound terrible, but all those comments sound like to me is bunch of angry "feminists" who just recently shaved their heads, playing victims Olympics(having been gold medalists in all the previous events) sitting at home with their 7 cats, wishing they had a man. Or the divorced multiple times already, most likely with now grown children of their own, and their cats, being angry about how their life choices haven't exactly led them where they wanted to be at this point in their lives! So now they are bitter, angry, and miserable, and because they spend way too much time online, scrolling through tiktok, listening to the other crazy women screaming and crying about how much they hate men. So now all they know how to do is project all their insecurities and INSANITY on everyone else!! As a mom myself, I had zero issues with him traveling for work. I find it absolutely weird to even expect someone to make every work trip into a family vacation. That should only be a once in a very great while, and only because certain things just so happened to line up well, and it worked out, type deal. The family going should be the exception to the rule. NOT the rule!!! But hey, this is just my own, biased, and maybe a bit of projected, opinion!!! 😅🤣 Either way, best wishes to you and yours!! To EVERYONE!!! God Bless!!!💖🙏💖🫶

[@SkateWeird4]

completely agree, work trip is a *work* trip. if i was him, i'd ask wifey what i could do to prepare her for being gone for x amount of days. but beyond that, i will be doing my job away from home and just because i'm in a different state or country, does not immediately mean i'm on a vacation.

[@Sancsteq]

what would reddit kneckbeards know about leaving their parents basement?

[@RacinJasonM3]

​@WhatTheWHAT524 lol, awesome! Sounds like you know some of them personally! When on a business trip, when the day was over, all trips include a "Business Dinner" (so annoying), all I wanted to do is SLEEP! Not go to the pool, beach, shop, or whatever else!

[@Lizzypoohxo]

I love when my husband leaves town for a work week! Our 5 year and i go buy a big bag of mini M&M's and order pizza and we just play video games and watch movies for a couple of days. We have some quality time together and we make the most of it. Then when my husband comes home the excitement on our som's face is THE best! We miss him like crazy, we miss his cooking and play time but there's only one time i actually wanted to stay with him because his company paid for these badass beach front suites and it was during covid so there wasn't a bunch of people out. But, our son was a baby and had his own set schedule and i didnt want to disrupt that.

[@AnyThiccPasta]

You know, just because you’re in a different location, you can still keep doing his schedule.

[@jenn8179]

My best triend was 7 1/2 months pregnant and was a brides maid (my sister was moh) in our wedding. She bought a dress 2 sizes too big and had it altered for her pregnant belly. We LOVE looking back on these pictures! We always say her son was at our wedding 😂❤ People be crazy about their stupid "aesthetics" 🙄 meet people where they are in life! She was absolutely beautiful! ❤

[@davinci3259]

Didn't the first story the guy said her money doesn't go to the household at all. Plus she maxed out all of her cards. He did word it pretty badly at first but if she has a spending issue that she cannot control then of course he needs to bring it up to her.

[@Smoothdice6520]

Exactly. He probably shouldn't have "laid out all the bills and asked her to point out one she paid" and thought about how he worded it, but if she isn't staying within a sustainable limit then it needs addressed

[@davinci3259]

@@Smoothdice6520 That is why as they read it I was thinking Leon and his wife were kind of jumping on the asshole bandwagon a bit to soon. Given we don't really know the whole story which is why his wording sounds bad, but if the guy pays for everything, while she spends her money, plus maxes the cards, and he still has to give her $500 on top of everything else to cover her spending with none of it going to any of the household costs. This may be a guy who is just at the end of his rope so to speak.

[@krock2894]

This is exactly how I was hearing them read it. Sounds like she takes and takes and takes without contributing anything. If she was contributing the maximum of what she could then it would be a different story, but sounds like she is using him and doesn't like being called on her shit.

[@Akoyabones]

From the way he explained it, she spends all of her money on herself and he pays for everything else. She even maxed out her cards..on herself and not even on any of the bills. NTA

[@isntitawesome2104]

Leon and his wife both had already made their mind in that situation and critical thinking part was missing in that situation. Both were supporting each other and taking each other validation as sign of them being correct and that loop continued throught the video. I don't know what kind of biases are at play at that part but it is fascinating to see human mind work in real time. What might have he said if Leon wife was not present there or they have thought a little more about the whole situation instead of giving a bland 2d answers so that they don't look bad.

[@deanbarnette1602]

The guy that didn't want to take his family on his three day work trip is definitely not the A$$ Hole, but Reddit commenters are definitely the A$$ Holes!!! 🤬💯

[@xixXxxXxix]

He wasn't originally but changing plans for everyone last minute is asshole behaviour lol. Although I wonder if his wife was actually in on the change (since she went along with the change & only phoned the daughter once they landed) but she told him not to dare throw her under the bus if he writes about it on the internet 😅

[@xixXxxXxix]

Sorry, I wasn't on to this problem yet and I thought you meant the Anniversary one. For some reason my comment won't show up to delete tho lol. Yeah, you're 100% correct and I think it shows what an incel cesspool Reddit is. The OP didn't say anything outlandish and they acted as though he told everyone he made her life crap day in day out of summit

[@desiree8395]

My parents celebrated 47 years in October! The kicker is everyone told them they’d never last because they got married after knowing each other only 3 months! Guess they showed them!

[@cindytriffon4942]

Time to get out the ouija board.. ask about the insurance policy... 😁

[@MarySmith-kw9bc]

About the insurance policy. This is difficult because my ex, who is also the father of 2 of my offspring ( He does have 2 other children by 2 other women) When he started his new job he contacted me to put me as the beneficiary on his life insurance policy. I declined. I told him it should be our son, maybe his wife, but not me. In the end he didn't put anyone down, and then he did end up passing away. Now the policy is sitting in limbo, has to go through probate and who knows now where the money will end up. He wanted me on that policy for a reason. If I would have simply accepted, the cash would be in my account and would have been distributed evenly between his 4 children after the funeral costs. We truly never know what is in a person's heart.

[@melissa06660]

The insurance one is complicated. Every employer I know of has a yearly insurance thing where they update the information on it. So 6 years and he didn’t change it. Something’s up with that.

[@Katz_Pajamas]

7:10 I love Mrs Lush's attempt to not misgender someone! "He, She, They...It...are...an assho1e." 😂

[@cmonson1]

lol. The jelly bean one was funny... but yeah, his sister is a horrible parent. I would have replaced my siblings snacks without having to be asked.

[@BunnyJosuke]

That’s what I’m saying. I get op was a bit childish about it but I think anyone would be upset if they found their favorite candy was gone in their own house bc your sibling can’t watch their child. I honestly think she helped. 😂

[@sithgamingyt4419]

My husband works out of town Monday-Thursday night, sometimes fridays which puts him home around 3 or 4 in the morning on Saturdays. For context, we live in Elk Grove CA, 20 miles north from Sacramento. He works down south, San Diego, Carlsbad, LA, sometimes he’s 5 minutes from Disneyland. We have 5 children, 4 living at home and I’ve never thought twice about bothering him with us all going as well. He’s there for work! He leaves his air b&b at 4:30 in the morning, gets back around 6-8pm so there’s not much we can do all week. It’s too expensive to stay for a whole week because what’s there to do while he’s working, A LOT! But we can’t do that every week! We do have a plan for next year march to April sometime for him to get a week off and we’ll all go and do all the fun things, go to the cool places, but that’s called a vacation! I trust him more than anyone in my life, I have no worry about him doing anything stupid, it’s called trust you crazy lady! His job is very important and we don’t need to be there not being able whatsoever to spend time with him.

[@lauriehand1021]

The ex with the money is 100% TA! She didn’t even know he died but is trying to convince herself he did that on purpose

[@michaelametty8809]

I think the money should go to his kids(not the mother or mother)?

[@suzannedavila1446]

​@@michaelametty8809she said the kids were the new gf not his.

[@SimplyConeh]

@@suzannedavila1446 Family doesn't end with blood

[@ninawink8973]

For the 40th anniversary vacation, I completely agree with you. I think the father could be super CLEVER in a way of apologizing, as he did say he did feel guilty about changing the tickets last minute. One could apologize for not informing them of the change of plans, as a famous Admiral had once said " it's better to ask forgiveness than permission" and I know that is taken in much different circumstances, you could argue it could be used in this situation. What I am saying is the father had no reason to tell them IMO about the change of plans, at least in a manner that the step daughter could argue. He definitely should have put his foot down at the start, as you guys said, but this is a very smart petty way to get the daughter back for imposing on the trip in the first place. So switching the plans to surprise the wife, is romantic as hell if you put yourself in her shoes, and she even said she was glad to have it. Just if he does regret not telling them he could pointedly apologize for NOT INFORMING them ya know? Something like, "I am very sorry I didn't tell you I was switching plans. I thought it'd be beautiful and romantic for our 40th anniversary to be here instead, and I hoped you guys would have a fun family vacation on your own!" arguing is mute at that point even if she huffs you can say you apologized, and hoped they had fun on their own vacation.

[@diaseph]

Don't touch my f'in Jelly Beans!

[@Shellygrrl2573]

Right! Ask first. I have children and rule of thumb is never touch people things without asking first. It's called MANNERS

[@OveToranger]

I disagree with the first one. IF as OP said, the wife has a full time job and her own salary (0:34), gets $500 a month (1:07) AND she hasn't paid any common expenses (1:01) for A YEAR plus has maxed out her credit cards (1:07). She's not contributing, she's spending money she hasn't earned/doesn't have (maxed out credit cards) AND she's definitely NOT contributing. Her contribution is spending money, not paying for the household/common expenses. IF she's paying for her own things like gas in her car and cell phone bill (1:12) that's literally what any other adult has to do to live - and if she's NOT paying for insurance/medical etc, house loan (or rent), groceries etc. etc. she's not contributing, she's just spending her salary AND her extra $500 0:46 She's not a provider, she's a spender - so no, that's not wrong. OP is the sole provider, she's a part of the household but NOT a provider, unless you count providing for yourself only ? 3:18 She's 4 months when she was kicked out...doesn't say how far along she'd be when the wedding was. The bride was TA anyway...but slight point there, she could be showing more during the wedding - but lets be honest here, if this is your maid of honor (ie. someone whos a GOOD FRIEND), would that matter ? No, not at all - be happy for them getting a kid instead. Bride TA definitely ! 25:55 How TF do you spend hours on spaghetti carbonara ? Cheese cake you prep the day before and that doesn't take hours... 28:14 Unless you're extremely slow you don't spend HOURS on that menu... OP is TA...and doesn't have kids yet...might learn later though ! Her sister should've stepped in and stopped her kid from fingering ALL the candies though - that's common sense parenting, also - "no, you have to wait till after food before you can have sweets" is a thing

[@forallhavesinned]

I think the 1st guy wasn’t an asshole. He said she works and spends NOTHING on the house. He didn’t say she paid less lol he said she paid NOTHING for the house. AND gave her $500.

[@tryaluck]

If it was the other way around his wife and other people would say he was a bum, yeah he's definitely not an asshole.

[@cmonson1]

I mostly agree. He didn't say how the conversation started, which is key to whether or not he ITAH. Do is paying all household bills and her maxed credit cards? He's nicer than most dudes. But yeah, depends on how this conversation started, but as it stands... not really. Rude... but not an Ah0l3.

[@snickers882]

And also said about how she's in debt... so maybe he contributes all the money and she spends all hers on stuff..

[@V3nomEX_DE]

Its never stated how house chores are devided or how she makes up the deficit, but if this is a case of "her money is her money and his money is their money", then he's NTA

[@shocked-by-your-nonsense]

Yeah, people always take the lazy woman's side in these sorts of things.

[@francisengevik9517]

Why? If she maxes out all here cards, she could rry to cool it down spending so much money.

[@MrsWellner]

Depends on what she's buying.

[@picaae]

A few years ago on a subway in Hamburg, Germany, someone was blasting music on something like a boombox and another passenger broke it, when he wouldn't turn it down after being asked. The guy with the music then pulled the emergency break 😂Ended up with a 500 EUR fine for pulling it when there was no emergency.

[@accidental-life]

Watching you two is awesome! Thanks for the smiles 😂

[@starparodier91]

I accidentally roasted my FIL with a SpongeBob meme that I sent to my husband when I was having trouble breathing (asthma) at my in-laws house while my MIL was out of town and their cleaners weren’t coming out that week. My FIL has no idea how to clean and just used Febreeze. My husband sent the picture of SpongeBob febreezing the trash to his mom I’d sent him and she found it hilarious. My FIL no longer uses Febreeze 😂

[@robertrickett7816]

I was riding a bus in LA when an idiot got on blasting his boom box, (this should give you a hint as to time period) folks asked him to tune it down, they literally had to scream to be heard. He just flipped them off, so I walked over, hit the power button, blessed silence, and applause. He stood up to confront me, looked me square in the chest, and walked off the bus. Bus driver said, he got off 5 stops earlier than usual.

[@krashd]

I thought you were going to say a guy bearing a striking resemblance to Leonard Nimoy touched his neck and he fell asleep.

[@michaelc1626]

Man typical fake 'I'm a badass' internet story, even included the applause, well done.

[@robertrickett7816]

Maybe if you got out in the world, and did something, you could have real stories of your own. But you've chosen not to live, not to go have adventures, that's why you can't believe others stories. Get out of your shell, travel, go places you've never been. You may surprise yourself, at what's out here, and what you're capable of.

[@reginafromrio]

Hansel and Gretel trail😅😅😅 that's totally my roommate and I'm gonna use it. Thanks!

[@jamesf8507]

Leon leaves Hansel and Gretel trails 😂😂😂

[@AnyaMidkiff]

So normally I agree with you two, and did here except for the last one. I don't think it's really about the jellybeans, but about how a lot of people with kids these days seem to think others should be catering to their children, even in their own home. Hear me out because I think folks with kids forget how seldom those without kids think about what kids might do. The host isn't used to childproofing their house or viewing their usual surroundings with an eye to what a kid might notice, even a decorative jar of candy. But I think their issue is that their sister, aka the parent, watched her child do this and said nothing. I mean, if i had grabbed something at somebody else's house when I was a kid, family or not, my mom wouldn't have allowed that, saying, "Hey! You don't take things that aren't yours without asking!" So I think it's a bit unfair to act like the kid should just be allowed to take things "because they're there", no matter what they are, and the parent should be the one correcting that behavior instead of just watching it happen. Maybe it's just me, and I will say I wouldn't ask the parent to "replace" something like that, but I would expect them to be the one supervising their own kid while I cooked them dinner...

[@Shellygrrl2573]

Exactly! It's called having manners and as a mother I would have told my kid to wait and ask for permission and wash your hands before sticking your grubby fingers into someone else's snacks. It's not hard to ask first and parenting your child to learn manners no matter what age they are. Not the a hole...the kids mom is the a hole.

[@AnyaMidkiff]

@Shellygrrl2573 agreed. It's not really much to ask, and better to learn it from family than later out in the world. 😳😉

[@spartan211]

Yup. I've said sometimes parent oriented people forget that those without kids aren't going to think the same way they do. When I was younger, it didn't matter if it was a family members house, I always asked. I'd either ask my aunt/uncle or my parent who would then ask and give me the verdict.pwrsonally if a kid ate my candy or drank my drinks I wouldn't care, but that's me not everyone.

[@AJayAnswersYou]

You're not off. I was taught by my father to ask before taking anything, anywhere in anyone's place. If I wanted specific things at specific times, I could buy them myself.

[@darkwolf1414]

100% agree! Also, if I were the parent of the child, who had eaten the jelly beans: 1) It wouldn't have happened because I wouldn't have let it or 2) If somehow my child sneakily ate the jelly beans, without my knowledge, I would replace the jelly beans, my sibling would get an apology from my child and there would be some sort of punishment for my child. I raised mine to ask first but kids will still sometimes sneak things if they really want it. People need to realize that YOUR world revolves around your kid. No one else really gives a shit and kids need to keep their little booger fingers out of other peoples' things. If your kid does something like this, it's on YOU and YOU need to make restitution.

[@ArmitageShanksMC]

AITA 1 depends a lot on what caused the husband to pull up his wife. He also said he gives her an additional $500 a month to pay off her maxed out credit cards. I lived with a GF for a few years, and I was earning around 4 times what she was, she was also studying full time. I would pay all the bills, pay for all the groceries and pay our rent. She would literally never contribute to the household in a financial way. I worked 10 hours a day with a 2 hour commute each way, and when I'd get home from work she'd IMMEDIATELY want me to shower and go out to do something that I would inevitably pay for, be it eating out, shopping, seeing a movie. She wouldn't even let me sit down and take it easy for 30 minutes. I was mostly OK with that, she did do the majority of the housework (cleaning, laundry, etc) although I would cook and do stuff like the lawns and whatnot. The straw that broke the camel's back was when we were planning a vacation to Vietnam, right before we left she complained to me that I didn't contribute any money towards the trip (even though it would be my vacation pay that would finance us while in Vietnam) and I mentioned that I pay literally every household cost and let her do whatever she wanted with her pay packet (which after I paid all of our expenses AND paid for any nights out we would have was usually more than I had as disposable income) she went mental and didn't speak to me until about halfway through the vacation. It was a super depressing break, and caused me more stress than my job did, so when I got back from the holiday I was super tired. Anyway, it's not always black and white, and I bet of the post was made by a woman speaking about her husband not contributing both of you would have a different opinion favouring the woman. TLDR: AITA 1 the guys not an asshole for pointing out his wife contributes nothing financially while he's also paying the lion's share of her debt.

[@carlydew1823]

My best friend all thru high school was getting married and I was to be her MOH, but I had a baby a few months before the wedding date and I didn't fit in her traditional Chinese dress (she was in no way Asian, btw, just wanted to add) anymore so she immediately replaced me with her cousin that she always told me she couldn't stand. Our friendship fell apart after that and we haven't talked in years now. 4:57

[@LushLifeTV]

absolute madness... can't believe people like that really exist.

[@MrsWellner]

Sounds like it wasn't a real friendship. Real friends don't care about superficial crap.

[@AliceNsWonderland]

4:19 ok... this just made me fall in love w Leon a little ❤ 😍 🤣

[@colesquared2]

It’s so cute watching Mrs Lush read like I do, we both need some damn glasses. 😅🖤🖤

[@ItIsWhatItIs8120]

20:49 My question is who is in his wifes ear ? There is definitely an underlying issue with the wife? He is not the AITA.

[@mikedavis9924]

I'm starting to think that Leon only has one shirt. Swear he's been warning that same shirt for the last 5 videos or so 😂😂😂

[@Jack-M1113]

My ex-wife didn't do anything, hence, ex-wife. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 get wreckt

[@dreamworldtony]

LOL

[@aliciacarstensen7904]

I'm so content to be single. 24/7 peace

[@Jack-M1113]

@@aliciacarstensen7904 eh just don't close yourself off ya know? But yeah single aint bad. Im crushing it at work and all my money goes to me 😎🇺🇸🦅🥳🥳🥳 haha

[@forg0tten]

so does the kid who ate the jelly beans just get whatever it wants? how do you take the kid through a grocery store? you need to start saying no at home. I think the jelly beans should be replaced.

[@sweetwentworth]

It is easier not to go down those isles. The outer part of a grocery store has what our species consume. Meats/vegetables ect. The rest is all chemicals and candy. You control what isle your child goes through.

[@kikialeaki1850]

@@sweetwentworth chemicals are in everything. Y’all really need to come up with a better word.

[@dyastro7479]

​@sweetwentworth or how bout u treat ur kid some self control. My bro and I did our fair share of "can we have thissssss" and even straight up putting crap that we wanted in the cart (as if that would trick our mom into buying it) But with enough responses of "NO", we learned that we shouldn't bother anymore (and should buy it with our own money too).

[@babbleinrl5626]

Loved this episode. I would love to see more of these!

[@Buskin8tor]

I wanted to say I enjoy your back and forth discussions. It reminds me of my wife and me.

[@MrsWellner]

Woo hoo, birthday drama from my favorite Mass couple!!! Hey Lush family!!!!

[@UDntNoMeButUWill]

Jane is the a-hole!!! Enough said. And her husband for not talking to Jane not to ruin the 40th anniversary

[@walterpiar2859]

I hope that 1 day in the near future. Claire finds out that her husband only married her for esthetic reasons and she walks in on him being spit roasted.

[@ravenslight2549]

Nah yall are wrong on this one about the jellybeans. I'm a parent as well. I was always taught respect other people's houses. Dont touch things that dont belong to you. Its not about the damn jellybeans. Children should be taught to respect others belongings. It would have been different if he had asked if he could have some guaranteed. He didnt, and his mom just let him do as he wished. That is not ok. I understand he is just a child and sometimes that temptation is strong. But had his parents taught him to ask for permission, he would have asked. So its clear he wasnt taught that. The mother should take responsibility for that and start teaching her child mannors and also replacing the candy as a good will to making things right Edited for question: would you allow your child go enter into someone elses home and just rummage through their stuff and eat their snacks or pocket something? I bet you wouldnt. I bet you are teaching your child mannors and respect

[@elfdogre2181]

100% agree. If this is indeed a real story about that person's life and family, hopefully they learned to put certain things away if they have family over.

[@slothy387pooh6]

Yap yap shut up

[@ravenslight2549]

@elfdogre2181 but that is not what my comment is about. You just don't touch things that dont belong to you. I'm not gonna hide my things away when company comes over. If there are children coming over, they can ask or I can offer. If they touch my stuff like that I'm gonna look at the parents and say, "um can you get your child to leave that alone please? Would anyone expect to put things away in their own house? Again I was taught don't touch things that dont belong to you. And best believe when I was a baby in my walker, and trying to grab things off the coffee table, my mama smacked my hands and said no no don't touch".

[@deadlyrobot5179]

But when you know that kid is an A-hole, you're in the wrong.

[@elfdogre2181]

@@ravenslight2549 I understood what your comment was about. That's why I said that I, "100% agree." I also grew up with manners and would never have dreamt to take something unless it was offered. The remaining part of my statement is in regards to that person's family. Obviously they can't be trusted to keep their hands off of other peoples' stuff, and they aren't teaching their children to be respectful either. Since they aren't likely going to change in the near future, and were backed up by their parents being stupid about the situation, the main character of the story should either 1) put things away that they don't want touched when their family comes over, or 2) don't invite them over and instead go to their place to visit. If they want to show off one of their dishes that they made, then they should ask if they could go over to their family's house early in order to prepare the dish in question. A bit of a pain, but would solve the issue of not having stuff in their own house taken or broken. I had to do similar when my son was a toddler and my older brother wanted to bring his two kids over for play dates. His children weren't taught to take care of their toys and they ended up breaking some of my son's toys on multiple occasions when they were over. At first I tried to correct their behaviors, but when it kept happening I knew nothing would change unless I offered an alternative. I didn't make a huge deal of the situation, but told my brother that since he couldn't teach his children to respect other peoples' things, then if he still wanted to have the play dates, I could bring my son to their place. Of course, that went down as poorly as expected, but it's either say something and offer an optional solution, or continue to have things broken. I knew my brother wouldn't pay for the toys since he had destroyed one of my pans one Thanksgiving when he and his wife came over and wanted to cook some food at my place so it was fresh and hot, and thus better. I said it was fine. Because they were too busy socializing with the family, they burned the thing they were attempting to make and my brother grabbed a metal spatula to use as a scraper and proceeded to scrape the hell out of my skillet which ruined it. I didn't realize he had done so because I was busy trying to air all of the smoke out of the house by opening windows and doors. When I noticed him doing what he was doing with the scraper, I took the scraper and pan away from him, but it was too late. He denied any wrong doing claiming he did similar with his own pans and had no problems with them and he refused to pay to replace the damaged pan. Yay for dysfunctional family! I no longer have my brother over to my place. He's proven himself to be how he is, and I don't care to continue to have my stuff damaged simply because he's a clueless twit. If he wants to visit, I can go to his place and do so. Btw, the rest of the family was split on who the a-hole was in that situation, but with a majority siding with me being wronged by him. Goes to show how growing up in similar circumstances can have wildly differing outcomes. Apologies for the book response, but figured I'd share where I was coming from with my comment.

[@JoshuaPlaysMusic]

My wife spent 15 years at home, raising our kids, while I was deploying and usually gone for training. When I got out, she got her Masters Degree, while I jumped into Military Contracting, and now she's my Sugar Mama, bringing in more than I ever could, and I'm not ashamed to admit it!

[@JessJArt]

And are you pulling your weight at home and with the kids while she is the bread maker?

[@JoshuaPlaysMusic]

@@JessJArt I've always pulled my weight at home. I love to cook and clean, it's like therapy to me. But, I also do work around the house, when things need to be fixed, or painted, etc.

[@JessJArt]

@JoshuaPlaysMusic Okay but you say it's like therapy for you, see the privilege here is that women don't get to clean because it's like therapy, we clean because we have too, no one else is going to do it. We cook because we have to because no one else is going to do it and you didn't say anything about taking care of children? That's where the real hard work is.

[@JoshuaPlaysMusic]

@@JessJArt I never forced her to do anything. We met while I was serving, and my Career actually made it possible for us to even raise a family, when we were that young. She understood what marrying a Soldier would mean, and willingly entered into this relationship, with the desire to stay home with the kids. It was a mutual partnership from the start. In all of our friend circles, I don't know any couples where the husband is forcing their wife to do the work, or it won't get done.

[@JessJArt]

@JoshuaPlaysMusic Then you are luckier than most to have friends like that or they are lying to you. The average husband these days spends about 4-5 hours daily playing video games. These are "men" with children and who are apparently also employed. And yet these men want to complain that they want their wives to be traditional and be home with the kids yet they simply do not want to work. They complain that their wives who also have to work want them to participate in the taking care of their own children and cleaning their own home. Yet they wanted a home and a child. And many of them will be cheating and have another woman on the side, they see no problem with this and actually expect to be able to do this. Men are not what they used to be. You say your wife knew what she was signing up for, but that doesn't suggest that you participated as a father in your children's lives when you could not does it suggest that you are as helpful in the home as she was when raising kids nor in the way she requires while she is working all day. I'm assuming you're children are grown and living on their own. You say that you work on the exterior of the home but when women have to do it we are called despicable names and told that we have to do the exterior home care because no man will have us. Yet most women taking care of themselves, their kids and their house are doing it out of absolute necessity because her man proved not to be worth much.

[@MarySmith-kw9bc]

Not on topic at all. Just want to say I love watching your channel simply because you two are an amazing couple. The way you support each other is beautiful. That's all. Proceed.

[@Brandon84J]

AITA for the fact I didn't watch this yesterday, and just now being here to support my favorite channel?

[@William-p2b]

Y'all some of the coolest people to be! Love watching y'all's videos, please keep on keeping on

[@dreamworldtony]

I love you guys fr!!!

[@StoneeWattxz]

14:36 specifically to the life insurance - as a man who has a girl that doesn’t give two shits about him anymore still on his life insurance. I get it. I loved you. I cared for you when I’m gone. I want everything I’ve earned to go to you. Only two reasons as to why a man would forget that a girl is on his insurance - one being the most obvious- I/we/he died. The other one is because my relationship isn’t going that great and I will never forget the first love I had. You only start remembering your life insurance policy unless you’re switching. But mine is up-to-date and only my family is on there. Then again I haven’t switched life insurance policies in a while so…. 🤷🏾‍♂️

[@wonderbreadjumps]

NTA! I am a person and the child of a parent. I relate so NTA!!!

[@DaniS398]

The work trip guy....his wife didn't have a problem with the trips, she was accusing him of cheating. He was NTA. She sounds controlling.

[@Arlosmom2021]

Married for 42 years

[@LushLifeTV]

bless your soul

[@TheOfficialPatriarchy]

First guy is not the A hole. This is an accounting issue and math does not care about anyone's feelings. He pays for everything and gives her a $500 subsidy which easily dismisses her gas and cell phone excuses, meaning her entire paycheck is hers to blow and yet she still manages to have maxed out credit cards. This is blatant irresponsibility. She is operating at a severe budgetary deficit and is a net loss for the household income, not a contributor. The cards need to be cancelled and her spending reigned in before she bankrupts them.

[@assistant83]

I look forward to each video you guys release! Love your content!

[@davident1]

I love Mrs. Lush's laugh when she is really tickled. LOL

[@basedlogic]

Staying at home with your children, is not like a full-time job. It's a privilege to be able to raise your children and be home with them. Fully taken care of by the other spouse, who does not get the privilege to be able to spend as much time with his children. And anyone who doesn't understand this, needs to give their head a shake.

[@joewoodfin1642]

No he sounds like the provide to me, If he pays for everything, then yeah he’s the soul provider, he’s not ass hole he’s paying everything nothing wrong with that, he provides

[@ellenstone9704]

My son has to travel for work about 10 days each month. His wife is a wonderful person. His trips cause him a lot of stress because he would much rather have the schedule he has when he’s home. He is a hands on dad and misses not only his wife but all their kids too. This man is NOT the ahole. His wife is creating problems where there are none. Our job as spouses are to support each other, not complicate things for each other. Yes, my son helps at home too. Mutual support!

[@0ipatchz]

Always looking forward to your next videos cant wait for the next ones some of these storys r just crazy

[@SylentTiger]

I'd be pissed at Ex's mom pressuring me like an AH. But I'd check in with his GF and kids and talk to them about Ex and give them it instead. Maybe give it to his kids, held in an account they can't access until they are 18. Definitely not accessible by x-mom.

[@MysteicVoltronus]

I now realize with the life insurance story why my company makes us redo our benefits every year. And while "keep it all the same" is an option it still makes you go through things like this with the "does everything still look right to you" kinda vibe.

[@TheyCallMeNathanialGreene]

Reddit is probably the worst possible place to look for reasonable takes 😂

[@TimPortantno]

Your credit is basically shared as well if you're married, so even if it's a green card marriage, he's just costing himself money if she has to max out cards to pay for gas and bills.

[@majorhawker4776]

The First one Not with MAXED Out CCs. The Dad was Correct screw that inviting yourself and getting shit for free from your parents. NO give the Money to the Family, you will never be right, unless SHE had a CHILD with him. Work trip Dad is NOT the Asshole, I get it my wife and I used to have to travel for work, my were schools so I would always working or studying and hers she would be at an Office, so I would hang out with the kids at the pool and we would go to dinner or if she had a dinner meeting, I would do something fun with the kids.

[@sarahcaitlyn88]

I have neighbours and they have a decent arrangement in their marriage regarding money. Both have GREAT jobs, She makes more than him. So they split the bills but based on a percentage. Because she makes more, she pays more.

[@dreamworldtony]

Kinda how taxes should work in a perfect world lol

[@NotMe-ej9yz]

​@@dreamworldtony I mean that IS how taxes work in the United States. The top 1% of earners pays for 50% of all income tax revenue in the United States. I can't remember the exact stat for the bottom 50% of earners (middle and lower class) but they pay something like 4% of the total income tax revenue lol (not an exact number but the point is it's laughably low comparatively) The rich pay A LOT in taxes and part of that reason is because they're in a higher tax bracket and thus are required to give a higher percentage of their income to be pissed away by the government so they can spend $800 on a soap dispenser for the military.

[@claymang]

I love when you guys do these AITA posts!! PLEASE DO MORE!! :)))))) DYNAMITE CONTENT MR/S LUSH

[@BaresarkSlayne]

Reddit is all asshats. I was stupid enough to put up a post discussing my divorce and expressing how upset I was, only to have people basically say that since I'm so upset and I mentioned a few things that actually made me a little angry about it, that my anger is proof that she did the right thing in divorcing me. It's the most circular logic crap I have ever seen with these people. Anyone who turns to the internet for anything besides the lolz and cat videos is truly a moron. I basically ended up deleting the post because people had become vitriolic, basically calling me a monster who deserved the bad things that had happened through that process.

[@Shellygrrl2573]

Geez. Sorry that happened to you. People are asshats. One time I said nobody has any business snooping through somebody's phone especially if they didn't pay for it just because their ex cheated on them. and everybody jumped down my throat like I was a bad person. My opinion was if you have a trust issues be alone because it's not your partner's job to be your therapist, go see one or just be by yourself. That's it. I was " the monster" of the day. I don't go on those types of platforms anymore. I actually think the people in those comments had more psychological issues than the OP...lol..

[@Sancsteq]

yup the internet is full of morons who will just make up whatever they want about you just to create drama or because they're triggered, they're the most weak willed people, who just like to talk big or act like they understand the diverse human condition until it doesn't suit them anymore.

[@BaresarkSlayne]

@@Shellygrrl2573 At this point, it's all good, but thank you for the kind words. Yep, these people are the worst. You are completely right. If someone walks into a relationship with trust issues, that is on them. No one has any right blaming the person who deserves their privacy.

[@JessJArt]

It's crappy that happened to you both, in my experience it is KZbin where I have received the most attitude like that especially due to my comments about my separation from my abusive ex and was blamed for his abuse because I didn't see the "red flags". There are some awful people out there.

[@J-Belle68]

Before I met my husband he traveled a lot for work. This continued after we married. We had our child the following year. He was able to stay home for a month afterwards vacation, personal time. Then back to work, he traveled 3 weeks out of every month. A few times we flew out to where he was. I definitely was a single mom for at least 3 years. We had complete trust in each other. Now he works at home. 🎉 So much better.

[@austinhuber3131]

I'm sorry, in the first one he pays all the common bills and her personal bills. She's making money and it's going where? She doesn't feel like she needs to contribute or be held accountable for her spending habits? Maybe it's not super polite how he's bringing it up, but if what he's saying is true, she's the asshole. If her small contribution isn't even a contribution at all, that's a problem.

[@taelok]

Leon, Mrs. Lush, you folks gotta link your drip in the description! Love that jacket, Leon. What you wearin'? Where can I get that sippin' cup?

[@Daniel-ek5dz]

Love you guys 🍅

[@ItIsWhatItIs8120]

I wonder if the bride was marrying the first tech guy ? 😂😂😂

[@mackinacisland3825]

I traveled several times during my work life. Rarely did my husband and kids come along. My husband never had an issue with this. Occasionally, my husband will meet up for the weekend b4 ar after the work part is over or begun. It is work, pure and simple.

[@soitgoes0321]

When I joined the Marines in 2001 I didn't have any family, so I left my $250,000 SGL coverage in case I died to my recruiter lol

[@leaharris101]

When my husband traveled for work and it was for more than a few days, sometimes he would invite me to come along, sometimes he didn't (and that was fine, boundaries are important). Now I didn't always take him up on his offer as my own work would get in the way or I wanted my own time to myself. I NEVER assumed that every one of his work trips I would be invited to. I didn't just show up or invite myself because that is just rude and could be construed as unprofessional on his part if it was a work trip with his coworkers.

[@basstfestivalvlogs7684]

Marriage sounds awful so i make 80% of our household income but i gotta make sure u feel valued for contributing less then 1/4 on a two person team.... Ya imma go ahead and pass

[@hawyadoin1175]

I hope you haven’t given up on Decently Indecent, Leon. I really appreciate the down to earth talks.

[@cdonnelly5566]

@4:57 absolutely perfect cut 😂😂😂

[@knight4today]

Anniversary trip around minute 9- preacher I once knew said he and his wife took two vacations every year: a Baptist trip and a Pentecostal trip. The Baptist trip had the kids and everything was pre-ordained from above. The Pentecostal trip had no kids, and involved speaking in tongues and laying on of hands.

[@allie6469]

My husband has a 9-5 on top of working for the military and trust me I appreciate those work trips. I have no kids, work my own full time job as a teacher of 14 two year olds and sometimes I just need the space to take some me time to decompress for 5-7 days. Shit I did it for 6 months during the war on syria. He does try to invite me on work trips when he thinks it is somewhere I would like to go to and I can appreciate it.

[@EMorner]

Man: My wife has a spending problem, I pay all the bills, plus give her money in addition to her paycheck, I made this clear to my wife, AITA for stating facts? Lushes: OMG YES!! So what if she can't control her spending! You are toxic! I guarantee it, that if this was a wife writing in, in the same situation, you would still make the man out to be the bad guy! Such blatant sexism!

[@LushLifeTV]

Nah the wife can suck too, I’m just bias bc my wife is very frugal so I’m lucky

[@reginafromrio]

I never would have thought of asking permission to eat anything at a relative's house. Someone else? Absolutely. And a jar of jelly beans with a 7 yr old? C'mon....

[@XxMaddieCat]

People can be so weird about weed. There's such a stigma that if you smoke, you're a lazy bum. But it's no different than a glass of wine after dinner. This guy is literally on a work trip, he provides for his family. What's wrong with a little j during your me-time?

[@jonathancarreiro4333]

That entering Boston hat is peak drip. love it great episode.

[@realbadger]

I love your videos, and this sort particularly as I can do tasks and listen, while With Videos I have to take time to Watch.

[@josephhubert4693]

I'm not even going finish watching this video because the fact that you immediately said that he's the asshole when she doesn't contribute financially is mind-boggling. What does she do then? Her credit cards are maxxed out even.

[@troiennist1410]

Yes!! More AITAH please!!

[@miiissfox]

I think that guy should be able to go on a work trip by himself.

[@lolalarue9708]

My EX-husband traveled for work Monday - Friday. Sometimes he would even leave on Sundays. We NEVER went on work trips with him. Not sure why the young mother with 2 sons felt she was entitled to go on work trips with her husband and turn them into vacations? She sounds very immature. I worked 3 days a week and took sole responsibility for our 5 children when he was gone. My days started pretty early and ended pretty late. He, on the other hand, worked his 8 hr day while on the road and had all the other time for himself. According to him, after working hours, he would order dinner, watch tv and go to bed around 8:30 or 9pm. I didn’t even leave for the gym until 9:30pm so I could work out after my younger kids were in bed. I could leave them with my older 2 kids who were told to call me if anyone would wake up and I could literally be there in 3 minutes. I had zero complaints. I loved our crazy life! The older kids would usually have friends over, edging that number of kids in the house to 7 - 9 on a nightly basis! Again, I loved our crazy life! The problem began when my now ex-husband decided that on the weekends he couldn’t participate in any family activities, household chores or any outside maintenance (ex. mowing the lawn) because he needed to sit in the basement all weekend, watch tv and decompress from his “very important job”. At one point I figured if I’m doing everything anyways, what did I need him for?!? And that’s why he’s an EX-husband!

[@intothevoid47]

23:29 It's hilarious hearing Reddit say these things when most of the users commenting have never even been touched by a woman, let alone start an actual family. One that doesn't have 3 participants and call themselves a "wolf pack"...

[@adrianryberg]

My partner wasn't happy with her career as a teacher. She has now gone back to studying, which she will do for the next 3-5 years. Meanwhile we have bought a house, new car, we go on vacations, we have her friends, relatives and family over frequently to stay with us (I built a guest room just for this). I fork out for all the bills, she doesn't even know what it costs to live the way we do. She supports me 0 financially. We share chores - we both cook, clean, laundry etc I do the more labour intensive work e.g. house and gardening, but she takes care of the plants. I have never been happier in my life. She's happy, I'm happy. We support eachother mentally and encourage eachother to be better. I've never loved someone this much in my life and I'm feel so lucky every day when I wake up and go to bed next to her. This is what I remind her of from time to time shen she feels guilty and considers getting a job instead of studying. Happy wife, happy life.

[@GenoReaper333]

Work trip guy framed it in a way that i 100% believe he is cheating

[@Jenn_Lucky]

Dig it! That was fun guys

[@BunnyJosuke]

I had a very similar experience to the Jelly Bean story at work the other day. It’s funny because regardless of what kind of candy it was I totally know how they felt. I frequently buy Japanese snacks and candy’s online to get my fix for my cravings a lot of times. I work at a daycare, and Sundays are pretty slow, so I usually bring more fun snacks with me I can actually enjoy and don’t need to scarf down quickly. I got up to go with a kid that had an accident and actually needed to shower off in our bathroom. When I returned to the room with the kid, I didn’t notice anything strange at first until I saw what looked like a cupcake under the table. When I looked closer I noticed my little dessert I brought myself had been stolen, torn open and only picked at, then thrown under a table to hide it. I was SO FLOORED. I think it was the disrespect more than anything? Like why didn’t you finish it? Why didn’t you throw it in the trash?? Why didn’t the other teacher notice? 🙃 I never would’ve thought to do that at that age. It was just crazy how I instantly knew who it most likely was considering most younger kids can’t open that plastic packaging (half the kids in the room were toddlers). And the funny thing is, this specific kid had shown up while I was in the back with the kid who had an accident. I knew none of the rest of those kids in the room would do anything like that anyway. Kid in my situation is about the same age. A couple years older. But I think 7 years old is plenty old enough to know that if something isn’t yours, you SHOULDN’T touch it.

[@patriciau6277]

I had a job that required a lot of travel. On trips where I figured there would be more work then down time family did not go especially if the destination was nothing special. But, when it was a once in a life time location I found away to include them.

[@GenericName9835]

Dude, Leon’s mullet is coming along nicely 😂