Seeing My Birth Mother This Weekend - My Nerves and Personal Feelings

[@diannewi]

Alex, your presence in Mama Tatiana's life has given her love she never experienced. It seems she is really opening her heart to you. This was not the case when you first met her several years ago. You've made a tremendous difference in her life. Good luck on your weekend journey.

[@sewingBay1255]

Exactly. I think no one was ever there for her. No one to count on. You turning up, looking for her, must have blown her mind. You cared enough to find her.

[@glauciacruz7186]

When i hear you i think Its imposible not to be happy and thankfull having a son like you! You are a special person , God bless you allways. ❤️❤️

[@Mama_Syna_]

Alex, you're a real blessing for both of your families 😇 I wish you all the best with your birth mum!🙏

[@EyesonEnforcement911]

Please thank your parents back in New Zealand for being such an amazing mother and father to you. You are so blessed Alex. Wishing you all the best on your journeys across the motherland. Looking forward to your next video, my friend :)

[@rosengade8887]

Brother, your love and concern for her will heal her childhood experience gradually. Keep connected with her always.

[@aliciabalchin7277]

You are a kind and sensitive young man. Very best wishes for your visits in Russia.

[@Anca820]

Alex, I won't tell you not to be anxious because it's a normal emotion. Some of us feel anxious more often than others, and I believe we are simply more sensitive people. Try to remember that once you arrive to see her and begin to spend time, it will pass. She is a more complex person than your birth father, and her life has been different than his and certainly what you're used to in New Zealand. I'm sure you'll have a great video for us after you see her again, and I know that you always touch her heart! You're such a wonderful person and son!

[@Jenz873]

Stumbled on your videos last month. What a wonderful young man you are. Your birth mother struggles with the damage from being institutionalized at a young age. Don’t be nervous. Seeing you makes her so happy inside. Knowing that you turned out so well. Mama Tatiana has loved you since the moment she knew she was carrying you. What a blessing that you found her and she has that peace of mind.

[@ms.lafondm.ed.3915]

Enjoy each moment, even the challenging or anxious moments. We grow from them. This is a blessing. Later in your life, you will always have peace that you are living this journey that has bestowed you. Thank you for sharing. Others will find positive inspiration from you.

[@nicolafigini784]

Yes, I myself find positive inspiration from Alex. Simply from his attitude to others and to life in general. And I’m 53!

[@Martina-Kosicanka]

Such a wise words. Unimportant, but it just has given me bit of needed strength...

[@nandinos]

I'm sure you're going to have a very meaningful time and build a better bond with Mama T. Just be yourself and have a good time!

[@MrTicolino]

your parents rescued you and now you rescue your biological mother. This is fantastic.

[@pamelafitzpatrick2717]

@@MrTicolino I really think that this was meant to be Claudia. Your right on the nail!

[@milenisch]

Tatiana is lucky to have you back in her life

[@souvenirjpgr]

Alex, your mother loves you. Take it from there. Awesome

[@bkhkh7285]

Больше всего в данной ситуации меня потрясает поведение приемных родителей Алекса. Это просто следующий уровень человека сознательного!

[@suemick8709]

I'm so happy to hear that you will have Vera as a travel companion. It will be good to share time with Tatiana with your growing knowledge of the Russian language.I've developed a maternal feeling for you worrying about your welfare so far from New Zealand but then I remind myself that you are a clever adult and a very likeable person. Always the best wishes for you Alex from a Canadian Grandma.

[@BibleBelieverUK]

Its good that you are sharing how you are feeling. The dynamic between birth fathers and mothers is (somewhat surprisingly) just so radically different. Yours is no exception it seems. My birth father passed away in 2000, long before i found him and his family, yet i have had a far better experience with them than the wall of silence from my birth mothers family (three years of ongoing attempts). My adoption notes suggest the reverse (birth father was bad, etc) so these situations are never so obvious from the notes. There is SO much to actually discover and sometimes "unlearn" - but fear, nerves and anxiety are ever present.

[@suemick8709]

How very thoughtful of you to share your experience and perspective Mark.

[@alexgilbert]

Thank you Mark for sharing this with me. Thank you!

[@mawmawd627]

Great perspective. Thanks for sharing.

[@flyonthe7013]

Enjoy the visit with mum. She is just very shy and feels guilty. I just feel sorry for her. Be as warm as you can. Looks like she has built this shell around her. You are lovely son and very lucky to have not 2 but 4 Parents!👍👍

[@sharonstone3284]

Sasha it is very exciting news. People who criticise must remember there was a language barrier the first time you met. I think she's a wonderful woman with a sensitive soul and a big heart. I wish you both well.

[@dee7353]

You birth father and mother are two different people. She seems to have had a tough life, is more insular, more shy. That makes sense as she did not grow up with love and nurturing like you and I did so it is hard to understand that kind of life. You seem to have to pull a conversation from her whereas your birth father is just more outgoing. So, your nervousness is understandable.

[@juliesprik9479]

I agree 💯 percent! I'm so happy for you! Thanks for sharing your story and your experiences!

[@kevinh.6556]

It's good you're honest and open with your parents in New Zealand and in Russia. It's wonderful you and your parents in Russia are making genuine attempts to build a healthy relationship. You're very blessed, especially with your father. The authentic love he showed you the moment you met still amazes me. You're very blessed. Cherish it, because my father never showed me that sort of love. It can have devastating impacts on a person's life. I hope all goes well when you visit your mother.

[@damianavoneric9991]

I lost my mother to cancer when I was a kid, she was only 39, and there's not a day that goes by when I don't think about her. Your mother is a gift from God, as are YOU. I'm so happy that you have the opportunity to spend time with her, and your father, too. 🤗 These are for your mother 💐

[@jocelyneb]

She talks, talks, talks... She is so happy to see you and has so much to tell you... Difficult for you both but you understand why. Its is a lot. = So much love between you. Nice of you to say "Mama Tatiana". Be sure You have a russian soul. You, and your 4 parents have a very big 💛. God bless you all.

[@littlemisshappy2002]

You are pressing on and working through the anxieties, which is the most important thing. Have a lovely time on Saturday - go easy on yourself. I'm sure mama Tatiana is also very anxious x

[@gailwagner8115]

It is wonderful you are so patient with your birth mom, she likely has not had a close relationship and it's not a natural thing for her.. born and raised in an orphanage and basically thrown out when you get of age. It's just hard, I'm sure. She WANTS to though, that is awesome! She is trying, in time you will both be more comfortable at the least ♥️ (imagine how happy she is that you did not repeat her life, I can imagine that would be her fear when she gave you up, it would be mine anyway.)

[@lorrainegatzke1048]

Vera, thank you for being an awesome friend and for looking after Alex. 💖 Alex my love and best wishes to you and Mama Tatiana. 🙏🙏🙏💖

[@catherinewiseman4083]

Alex, I recently found your channel and have been binge watching. I personally know a family here in America that adopted two children (a boy and a girl) from an orphanage in Russia in 2001/2002 era. I see your birth mother as probably having guilt for giving you up and also she doesn't know how to be a mother having never had one, nobody to hold her as a child, and that comes across as coldness when it is something altogether different. You are a special son for realizing this and not being hurt by it but continuing to persevere and nurturing the relationship. I'm looking forward to seeing how this next visit goes. Have a safe trip.

[@janeshea1798]

Alex just be yourself and make the time and moments as special as can be when you meet up with your birth Mama T. Enjoy your time with her.

[@rahmalia8247]

I wish best hope and pray for your birth mother,full of my respect for your journey

[@ClaudinneV]

What a nice and sweet person you are! All the best to you and your birth mother :)

[@peterkehoe1984]

Love your work Alex. Best of luck mate.

[@dionfeist5226]

I love hearing how your relationships with your birth parents continues to grow. I’m excited to see you have this chance to experience Russia and connecting with your birth parents during your time there. Looking forward to see how everything goes.

[@FamilyFunForever2013]

good to work through the family constellation challenges, as you are... love is what unites you all, beyond any shadows of the past... how wonderful that you are allowing the future to shine brightly for all of you. well done, Alex. 👍

[@tracymauro5245]

Sending you and your mom love and positive vibes.

[@aprilgraham-tash1124]

Sending you my best wishes for a truly nice visit with your Birth Mother 💕

[@nik90910]

Спасибо Алекс! Much love brother!

[@PRS777]

Hi I'm new here from Malaysia. Sometimes, some people do not open up easily. They are afraid of getting hurt. Just give her a chance to prove herself to you. God bless.

[@travismaupin6617]

I used to get so nervous with my birth mother. Your such a great person. This is so fantastic thank you for making these videos inspiring

[@mawmawd627]

Mama Tatiana is a SURVIVOR. I’m so glad she’s doing well. Each time you see her will get easier as you develop your relationship.

[@pamelafitzpatrick2717]

I believe as you give your birth mother time and you will, just being yourself, help her to blossom Alex.

[@lisebjerring9197]

Alex, I have a girl your age. Thinking of what you doing, how you do it. You are really an amazing young man. I hear the word you mention often, connect. And I love it. Exactly what we people need. I am Danish living in Stockholm, from me to you hugs, Lise

[@katheryns1219]

You are a very brave человек, дорогой! Good luck to you.

[@lancebergstresser3412]

Hi bro nice to see u ON youtube tell everyone we said hello god blessed

[@banemattiebrahaspat4902]

Can’t wait to see the video meeting ur mom and dad, stay safe... god bless

[@DmitryPomor]

Good luck!

[@joycegibbs5267]

I think you've given her an outlet Alex. A lot of pressure on you but you're such a mature, lovely person, who couldn't open up? ALL your family must be so incredibly proud. Keep it up, look forward to every video.

[@rhiannonrose4841]

I'm sure your mother is just as anxious and nervous and being a mother myself.I imagine she feels some pain in her heart as well.Once you guys have a real moment and a heart to heart your relationship with flourish.Maybe she needs to hear that you truly forgive her.I have other friends who are adopted as well and found their birth parents really needed to hear they are forgiven,you are such a great inspiring young man I'm sure you know all these things as well.Mamas are different then Dads you guys will be awesome

[@sidneylawson7767]

Being positive for you. All best.

[@LifeisEnergy2]

Very proud of you Alex! You did well. Sorry watched the other video first then this one. And All your mothers are proud of you as well 🙏🏽💕💕💕

[@mbsbrown7838]

Your birth mom and you are on a journey all of its own, this time you will be able to talk with her more one on one since your Russian has improved. Always remember she loves you and enjoy you two getting together.

[@jasmin0930]

I am so happy you will have some time to spend with Tatiana and be able to communicate better with her in Russian. I am sure the nerves are good excited nerves and I am sure she feels the same when she knows you are coming to see here but more than anything I know she can feel the love you have for her. Continue to stay safe, enjoy your time in Russia and the work to reach your goals 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@emzbagtas9781]

All the best Alex...prayers for your exciting bonding tomorrow now that you can relate much because you've been practicing Russian language...all the love for your family/s...Godbless always!

[@manxkin]

Looking forward to the reunion with your birth mother and your birth father. They seem like wonderful people.

[@didi-bc1xs]

Hugs from Serbia!😇

[@lanalucia3596]

I am so here for the journey! I support your bravery and courageous act of self-love and self-discovery! You are doing so much while you are here/there just remember to take time for yourself to process.

[@MikeAlabbasi]

*Привет Саша!* 😃 Thank you for sharing! This is really awesome, I'm positively sure it will be just fine, and it's gonna be a great opportunity for you to bond with your birth mother, I believe she's excited about seeing you. She would certainly be proud of the clever, humble, kind, respectful young man that you are. Вера, ты хороший друг. Большое спасибо! 🙂 Lots of love and respect to you, to Mama Tatiana, Mama Janice, Papa Misha, and Papa Mark. God bless you all. I wish you all the best. Stay warm, stay safe, take care, and have a lovely day! 😊 ❤

[@jeanpitt7401]

Awe, you are am amazing son. Just for you to make time to connect with Mama Tatiana is a true blessing for you both. Prayers for your journey in your birth place.

[@coG139]

What a wonderful journey of love! :)

[@maolector]

You have an excellent story, I was hooked on it from the first video I could see. You should write a book. Greetings from Colombia.

[@alexgilbert]

Thank you heaps for watching!! :) Yes I already have two books! :) You can read them online for free! :)

[@NurElv]

I can relate to the both words - New Zealand and Russia. This is so sad that your biological parents put you into adoption, but at the same time you are blessed to be brought up in New Zealand.

[@Pixlanta]

You're making memores

[@Martina-Kosicanka]

I wish you a pleasing experience

[@christinaandrade9923]

I really appreciate your open honesty in this video clip. Your heart is very patient toward your birth mother and I’m sure she needs that, more than you’ll ever realize, perhaps.

[@christinaandrade1386]

Awwww…. So happy to hear that you were going to see your birth mother, Tatiana, I am sure you mean the world to her.😊

[@Mary-by1nx]

Alex, hugs to Tatyana. You're visit with you're mom is going to be so smooth. Just being in each other's presences lifts both of you. She's a special person, as are you. Her brightness when she sees you is plain. Don't be worried, it'll just flow.💗 Thats how love rolls. 💞 Enjoy.

[@kathyhoskin8350]

I'm really looking forward to seeing you with your birth mom!

[@privatename8228]

Would love for you to state the temperature at the beginning of your videos. The term "cold" means something different to everyone depending on where in the world we are. Knowing what the temperature is as the month(s) go on teaches us about the Russian climate. Love your videos! ❤️

[@MarieS-yi7iu]

Maybe just enjoying the scenery with your mum? Bird watching, admiring a sunset together, walks in a park.... this is just a suggestion. Her past might be better left in the past? I have read that sometimes ppl from there don’t enjoy talking about their past.

[@MarieS-yi7iu]

I say this because I understand what you’re going through, and I’m actually facing a situation similar to yours. I will be starting a new relationship with a family member, and our goal is to make our own happy memories together so that each time we’re together we can remember our own good times together.

[@Mary-by1nx]

💗💗💗💗💝💝💗💗💗💗 It's ok Alex, I'm excited enough for both of you! I feel (I'm sure I'm not the only one) so protective for Tatyana💫It's important that any disdain from anyone not stain your time together. She is such a treasure & whenever you're together she💫 beams light💫 joy. Wow, I'm really excited for her. Enjoy that visit 😊 much love 💫 grace on your visit💗

[@suedoyle4526]

Ah it’ll be grand Alex. I can understand you being anxious but your birth mam is probably feeling the same. God knows what she’s been through in her life but you’ve brought her great happiness, she might not show her feelings very well like your birth father but if she’s bringing you to her workplace, she so wants to show off her gorgeous son 😊 It’s a relationship that doesn’t need to be rushed, it’s growing and will continue to grow. This will give you a laugh !!! I was about to write “we’re all on here rooting for you”. In Ireland it has a completely different meaning which I found out quickly to my embarrassment when I became friends with a Kiwi 🙈 Over here it can mean “trying to find something you’ve misplaced“ rooting for it” or saying to someone, We’re rooting for you” meaning “we hope things go well for you”. Hope that made you smile 😊 Everything will be just fine 👍😊☘️🇮🇪

[@alexgilbert]

Haha its okay! But yes that could have come across differently too! Haha thank you!

[@georgepetrin1334]

To parrot what Dissy said in a comment below and you alluded to in this video, your birth parents are drawing from different childhood into adulthood experiences. Your birth father had a stable family life growing up and then had a family of his own as an adult, so he knows the role family plays in a person's life. For your birth mother, much of that experience is missing from her life. The fact that she is eagerly looking forward to your arrival indicates she is trying to bridge the gap. I hope it goes better than even you hoped for Alex.

[@melindamccartney7563]

So happy your seeing Ur mother she will love it if you keep showing up everything will be fine enjoy

[@Marcantin92]

How amazing and unique is your story. I love to hear your story & journey. God continue to bless and be with you

[@AndersGehtsdochauch]

Hey Alex, once you said: maybe the russian language is still hidden somewhere deep inside your head, but nevertheless you have to re-learn it, step by step, gradually. Maybe the ability to feel and express love is still somewhere deep in Tatyana's heart. But she may have to re-learn that language of love. Step by step, and hopefully, you can help her re-discover and express it. Just by being you! I'm sure you'll have a good and meaningful time with her. Enjoy!

[@NicoleFrancescaCes]

It is good to hear that she is doing well. You are going to have a great time!

[@rossmorebaz]

You have an amazing and unique perspective on life Alex ..I think that you have a gift and that gift is positivity ... I think you are one of those people who always brings out the best in others .... You have a really good heart mate . The woman who you will eventually marry will be a very lucky girl Indeed !

[@robinellison6708]

I'm so glad you're going to visit Mama Tatiana! I know she's looking forward to it, wanting to show you off to the people she works with and tell them all the wonderful work you do! Have happy memories with her! Enjoy your time spent together. 😀

[@mariannesnead6919]

Just have quality time with her

[@janicelaurin7263]

Hey Alex, I think it is perfectly normal for you to have some anxiety over visiting your birth mother. I am so glad Vera is going with you. She is awesome. Is it colder where your birth mother lives? I can't imagine it being any colder there than in Moscow.

[@alexgilbert]

Thank you Janice! It will be around the same temperatures I think! :)

[@michaeldelia9048]

Brother you have the most beautiful blue eyes. I get your anxiety. You must have felt so many things. I'm sure it worked out. Just be of heart

[@freedomexplorer360]

keep going!! I love your journey!! thank you for sharing this!! Keep being authentic YOU

[@smartladylr]

take it the way it comes Alex, your Birth mother needs to catch up for all she hasn't got in her life, just lend her your ear, your attention means so much to her, and probably you'll learn through her talk a lot about yourself, but this will come later with the years ! it's great that your path crossed again finally !

[@immitable]

Thank you for sharing. Big thumbs up!

[@oksanaivanovna1207]

Have a great time :). I'm so happy for you!

[@aswaltan8962]

Im watching!😊

[@carineosselaer6960]

Thanks love.. Big hugs...

[@user-gi2kq5iu5l]

Hi Alex it's dobroye UTRA (literally say - utra) instead of ucha :) about your birth mother, we must never judge because our childhoods and upbringings are worlds apart and no one is perfect :) She is doing the best she knows how to, as we all are.

[@БактыгульКазакбаева-и6э]

Алекс, мы ждём с нетерпением поездку Вашей мамы Татьяны в Новую Зеландию ❤часто делайте ей приятно...оба Ваши родители счастливые люди так как, есть у них такой сын как вы

[@hassanjamal4212]

Hi, how are you. Hope your parents and you are at peace and harmony

[@armoniamg6750]

So mrs. Tatiana talks, talks...well you are just like her. 🥰

[@kookietherapy9398]

Surely she has PTS.

[@lorettajones5076]

Alex I am so proud of you and you are not my son. Praying for you from Texas.

[@baritonejp1]

I'm excited for you. All the best in your journey in Russia. Has your Russian improved quicker being in Russia and around Russian speakers?

[@margaretsofocleous8137]

Your parents have done such an amazing job turning you into a wonderful well rounded young man. They are so supportive and I know you will develop a great relationship with both your birth parents because of the empathetic and understanding and non judgmental person you are. You have the intelligence to know that Tattiana is as she is because she spent her life as a child in an orphanage. Your efforts and love will help everything tremendously. I saw the Russian show where it seemed she was be verbally abused but she sat there and took it. She obviously wants a relationship with you. I admire her for that. Please speak just a little slower. English is my first language and I understand you perfectly but I think your videos would be even more enjoyable to watch if you were to speak a little more slower. There is no rush and people can analyse and take in more if you did that. All the very best xx Margaret in Cyprus

[@relaxing2979]

Very good channel 👍

[@echo7759]

Arohanui Alex 🤗

[@salexander210]

She loves you Alex even though she doesn't show it much ,she grew up in the orphanage.It will take a little more time to be fully connected , she is your birth mom,just be patient.

[@EfferverscinElephant]

I lost my family. I like to see things like this. I'm Saami and there is not much of us on this rock.

[@pcalmalel6682]

👍👍

[@mysenf3575]

Hi. One question from me. Has your brother Alexej the same mother and father? Is he interrested in getting connected with his birthparents too.

[@waqtkiawaz7914]

You broke the ice she might need time to open up with you be patient, it's human nature she might be feeling guilt & might be ashamed of her act back then don't be nervous. Allah bless you n guide u to the righteous path.

[@BlueBlossomsBlues]

Can you imagine - you are the only blood relative, the one child she had and was separated from.. It would be soo hard for her to look at you and think of how it may have been to have brought you up and to have you for her..

[@Merbella]

Have you considered going back to the orphanage you were adopted from?