I watched TAROT so you don't have to | Explained

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But NOT goofy enough
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tarot movie
tarot horror
reacting to tarot
tarot is dumb
tarot is almost good
worst horror 2024
Jacob Batalon
ned spider-man
Avantika Vandanapu
Larsen Thompson
Harriet Slater
Wolfgang Novogratz
Humberly González
horrorscope
zodiac horror

[@AmandaTheJedi]

Thanks again to Raycon for sponsoring and making sure I can sleep through my screaming upstairs neighbour! Go to www.buyraycon.com/JEDI for 15% off your purchase!

[@Unfortunately_Mickey]

Don't get the green ones. I lost one of mine forever the second it fell in the grass😅

[@lils6407]

For the tarot, you should ask this Canadian girl, her name is Liz, her channel is called Charmed IntuitionTarot

[@toddhollen]

Maybe you could use some of that Raycon money and your 600k followers to help some of the people your country is helping G-cide by promoting some Operation Olive Branch families.

[@Feycat]

The podcast/documenting bizarre stuff in the friend group makes me think you'd like the original Archive 81 podcast

[@satisfied656]

Ohh...i didn´t realized the first character was gay when she died...

[@samlewis6487]

"He's an earth sign! They found him in the dirt!" That's. I'm not a horoscope girly but I don't think that's right.

[@AngelofGrace96]

She's an air sign, she's levitating!

[@GioInvestigatesFrogs]

They're a water sign! Oh... oh no. They're drowning! 😢

[@genericname2747]

He's a fire sign. He made Creme Brulee for all his friends :)

[@johnynoway9127]

​@@genericname2747naaa was born from a Witch burned alive.

[@SophieVanHelsing]

She’s a fire sign, oh my god she just spontaneous combusted!!

[@jim-bob3093]

If you listen carefully, you can probably hear the distant wails of tarot enthusiasts crying out in pain at this card butchery, haha

[@FabricFool]

Decidedly so.

[@jim-bob3093]

@FabricFool haha, knew it. My aunts about to rise from the grave to object to this heresy

[@HistoriaLectura]

As one of those I can assure you that the mood was a huge shrug emoji. At this point, crap like this is just another wednesday.

[@hibikuokudan]

You are very correct, I'm dying

[@instantromy]

It happened when I saw the trailer.

[@wobbly_doo]

That first girl was literally laddered repeatedly to death and the cops just said there's no foul play involved? What?

[@AmandaTheJedi]

Honestly that’s such an amazing point and I’m mad I just ignored the cop involvement entirely

[@gamingwithbonnie8051]

Eh probably was ruled a suicide

[@wobbly_doo]

@@gamingwithbonnie8051 repeated blows to her back and the back of her head can easily be ruled as suicide? Are you one of the cops investigating this?

[@VultureSkins]

⁠@@wobbly_doothat might be the joke

[@johnynoway9127]

​@@wobbly_doono foul play was involved. She hit her head repeatedly on the back of the head.

[@hannahfuhlhage5342]

Daily Horoscope: You Die Today absolutely SENT me

[@Ishtarru]

I was like "How is this a real movie?"

[@AidanOAArch]

Ah yes, when i'm in 1798 Hungary I always make sure my Tarot card's text is in English and shows the magician in late 1800's/early 1900's clothing. Because as an astrologer i'm just *that* good at seeing the future.

[@frauleinbird]

There are tons of US-American movies that are supposed to take place somewhere in Europe and everything is in English. Hurts every time. Oddly, this usually doesn't happen with European movies about other countries.

[@mama_verse]

Former (professional) Tarot reader here - that is not AT ALL what the Priestess, The Fool, Hang Man or any of them mean. These writers obviously picked things they thought sounded cool and have zero idea about what the cards actually mean. Or anything about them, really. Edit: I could see their interpretation of the Devil card, but hey even a blind squirrel finds a nut sometimes

[@AlishaHerbiederbie]

Or maybe trying to dumb it down for audiences they expected to be stupid. Still, it doesn't make any sense. Tarot isn't a foreign concept to most people, ridiculous

[@NovemberRose6]

I am also a reader (novice). I wish people would understand Death isn't literal death, but rebirth and transformation. Not to mention, all of them getting major arcana in the center is even more frustrating/inaccurate. I agree that The Devil is probably the closest to what a reading may entail.

[@Kalyahna]

@@AlishaHerbiederbie Most people are probably aware that Tarot involves a set of cards and might have heard of some of those cards, but that's about it.

[@AYOKat]

Tarot reader here. It's funny that they always go after the Major Arcana and twist them when the 8s and 9s of the Minor Arcana actually have more negative readings even in their upright form. If they were going for recognizability saying the 8 of Wands, Pentagrams, Swords, or Cups is still pretty niche to tarot and not overplayed in every single piece of media. Then you can have the tarot expert try to explain off-handedly about the suits and another character joking that they must be weaker cards. That way the payout of 1) a more specific/themed death can happen and 2) you also get the comedy of the characters going "I thought these were weaker!" Or something like that. Movies assuming audiences are dumb always seems there downfall. Instead of going "ooo look at the pretty pictures with scary people" they could have had genuine certainty by the reader that all pips in the Minor Arcana read the same between decks and then have more trouble down the road when it's different. This option could signify that she isn't experienced or that, like the readings about her boyfriend, she assumes and is stubborn and through the movie has to let go of the preconceived notions she always held. Or they could have had pictured Minor Arcana and led to her trying to decipher their meaning which could contradict or darken the generally known meanings. Either way, they could then bring in the expert to help them more because of the ambiguity and they could debate about the meanings, which leads to a disagreement, and that's why this expert doesn't stick with them and reappears closer to the end. Sorry and thank you for coming to my TED talk 😅

[@azuki_O]

Not a tarot reader but I read some stuff online. Yes. I said online. And depending on the websites the wordings and meanings of the cards can be different. And honestly, if I knew nothing about tarot (which.... Well I don't...) and wanted to quickly write a movie like that I would just use the first website or coolest looking one about tarot.......

[@nekograce7914]

Have we learned nothing from Supernatural? Pour salt on it and burn it. Right?

[@booksquirm92]

Omg ikr. I was screaming “where’s the salt??!” when they were burning it. I thought it was obvious

[@Gingermermaid90]

2 types of people on the world... those that are prepared to fight the evils of the night and those that aren't.

[@kseni_vely]

Abso-fuckin-lutely 🔥

[@nekograce7914]

Y’all…I feel good knowing that there are people out there who will help these dumb arses when and if the need arises.

[@Dragonspoetofdeath]

@@Gingermermaid90 Unofficial third: those who think they are, but...

[@jazzycat8917]

The "he's an earth sign, they found him in dirt!" fcking SENT me. The truest confirmation that whoever wrote this movie knows absolutely nothing about either tarot or astrology outside of maybe scanning a wiki page and decided that was enough research lol.

[@alexv3372]

What do earth signs mean anyways?

[@hope-cat4894]

​@@alexv3372They're earth benders. 😉

[@alexv3372]

Haha But no seriously what do they mean

[@Pippa87]

@@alexv3372 Just means you're a Taurus, Capricorn or Virgo

[@justinturingan2997]

@@alexv3372each elements in horoscopes are somewhat related to their unique characteristics so they each have differences that’s more i know

[@paintedpig3021]

For a movie about Tarot Cards you'd think the writers would do the bare minimum research into tarot cards

[@NeloBladeOfRanni]

I mean I'm not surprised it's very rare movie/TV show people do actual research into the occult when they use it in their TV shows/movies

[@GiulianaBruna]

Many times they don't even research the non occul​t stuff,

[@112523]

I bet these people also wrote the bye bye mam

[@Chuck_EL]

​@@NeloBladeOfRanni I mean until American Horror Story most studios didn't fully commit to understand Vodun or Wiccans (Not saying it never happened there's a few good examples of movies and shows that vaguely did them justice without spookism or racism)

[@NeloBladeOfRanni]

@@Chuck_EL even AHS shows it dosent understand either lmao

[@reb3578]

I'm an atheist raised by a Mum and Grandma who are both Spiritualists and Wiccan, so they taught me to read tarot cards. The death card DOES NOT mean literal death. It means something is about to end and something new is about to begin. One of my biggest pet peeves in TV and film is someone getting the death card and then dying. I thought a fucking movie called TAROT would at the very least get this right..

[@homeiswonderland]

Right? Absolutely no nuance.

[@alexv3372]

Well from what I know The death card is usually a tower

[@reb3578]

@@alexv3372 that and the three of swords are the somewhat "bad" cards.

[@alexv3372]

Why 3 swords?

[@reb3578]

@alexv3372 the three of swords card represents heartbreak. In most decks the three swords are piercing a heart or a person.

[@trexteacher16]

Ok not to um actually this, but... The death card in tarot does not mean death, it means transformation. It would have been great for her to get "the lovers" card, then her "love will be the death of me" would make so much more sense

[@AmandaTheJedi]

I think they tried to reason it out with how her zodiac factored in and that it only meant death because it was inverted but, yeah, they really just wanted her fighting *literal* death at the end because she was trying to fight her moms death when she was younger

[@teddy-1965]

I was thinking Three of Swords would also be a good option! Take that heartbreak meaning to the extreme

[@FabricFool]

You’re correct. They’re using Hollywood Movie Tarot tho, so obvs death card is literally death. As in “the death of originality…”.

[@AmandaTheJedi]

@@teddy-1965 The old lady got that one actually lol

[@caithenry8429]

This is exactly how I felt about the hanged man slander since it's my personal favorite card meaning

[@DPWFG]

They activated the witch's... trap cards

[@annetheelf8174]

Is this a Muffin Time reference? I play that game every Sunday at my grandmas house

[@juliatakacs3994]

Wait that's so funny, thanks for that😂

[@Laura-ql4mg]

Heart of the cards

[@mattbaltimore7195]

"The witch deck has no pathetic cards, Kaiba!!!!!!"

[@NeloBladeOfRanni]

​@mattbaltimore7195 but it does contain the unstoppable tarotxodia

[@justjax6000]

They’re graduating college and they couldn’t use context to understand that Demonio is Demon in Spanish 🙄

[@DrGregoryHouseIT]

Actually it's Italian but you do you...

[@jonnestyronicha497]

@@DrGregoryHouseIT it's insane that you said this as if it's not literally the same word in both languages lmaooo idk what your logic was here. and also she clearly spoke spanish? like italian and spanish, similar as they are, sound pretty different when spoken and that was clearly spanish

[@leiajiang7877]

not even use latin. Das lazyyy

[@112523]

I would've known that shit as a 10y/o

[@yesminogue23]

Did the movie imply it was a good college 😂

[@paintedpig3021]

I'm fully convinced this movie is a cabin in the woods sacrifice

[@PawsomePalsPetService]

That would have made a better movie lol 😂

[@Nexils]

But the virgin isn't the only survivor (so I guess one of the other sacrifices - maybe Japan - succeeded).

[@gregoryvn3]

Headcanon accepted!

[@EurydiceAllAlong]

It honestly makes sense that it was like a prequel to cabin in the woods about a previous sacrifice group but it didn't work out so they just made it a stand alone film

[@bigbearkat2010]

@@EurydiceAllAlong Especially when Ned has the same character archetype designated to him that Marty did

[@EmmaMurgatroyd]

I went to see it for the giggles after a difficult day. The biggest thing I remember is the guy being literally dragged into hell in one shot then helping the girl fight the demon/ghost the next

[@Chuck_EL]

It's like this was written in the mid 2000s and the Studio was like "Hey not many tarot movies, let's greenlight this "

[@myettechase]

“He’s an earth sign, they found him in the dirt” has IMMEDIATELY entered my lexicon

[@maxmustermann-zx9yq]

that so close to a wrestling-level-line aka "you're an earth sign? good ... cause I'm gonna put you in the ground!"

[@breakyourstory]

This movie was “based on” the book and was originally called Horrorscope but there was another finished indie movie that was actually called Tarot that was being shopped around the same time this trailer dropped and this Tarot stole the title, poster artwork, and tagline from the indie film. I don’t know what happened to it, but it might pop up somewhere at some point. I’d like to see that one.

[@alexv3372]

Wait fr ?!

[@matxalenc8410]

Damn! Why would they do that?

[@Nebulousart]

they got trevor henderson, TREVOR HENDERSON, to design the creatures and they fucked up this much? i feel bad for his art being associated with this alleged slop

[@joeschmoe3815]

Na, it's still a good showcase. Not his fault the writers are terrible.

[@janekoppitz]

If you were wondering why The Tower wasn't mentioned at all, it's actually because Robert Pattinson's character pulled it in the hit 2010 movie Remember Me

[@rachelanderson4325]

💀

[@naplockblubba5369]

I think that is the worst thing you could have written good job 👍

[@ReinBelmont]

Did he by any chance pulled it twice?

[@erikdaniels0n]

I remember getting the trailer for this and thinking “really??? Haunted tarot cards????? This is where we’re at now?”

[@pastaluvr5596]

For real, I swear my eyes almost got stuck cause of how far back I rolled them.

[@AugustRx]

It's a considerable stepup from ouija boards and dolls

[@RealBradMiller]

Neat year it'll be haunted dowsing rods, leading people to their deaths.

[@erikdaniels0n]

@@AugustRxat least Ouija: Origin of Evil was decent and there was like.. a couple decent Annabelle movies

[@gothnerd887]

I could make a better horror movie and I've never even been to film school. I could make it about something stupid like NFTs.

[@sunnypupbarks]

this had to have been originally pitched as a comedy, right? no fucking way a screenwriter uses a newspaper headline prop like that and goes "awe yeah this is what serious cinema looks like"

[@hitsugiluva]

capricorns are rule breakers?! nah bro im the one enforcing the rules!

[@Laura-ql4mg]

Right!?

[@drewberry4534]

I really wanna know where they got that trait from since we're stereotyped as boring workaholics damn Did they accidentally read Saggittarius' when scrolling through their teen horoscope website last updated in 2003?

[@val3kyria]

I was looking for this comment! I would understand Aquarius or Sagittarius, but Capricorn? The success obsessed ruled by the literal rules planet? Between that and the silly "death card means death" I know they didn't even google the meaning of anything 🙃😊

[@mxngos7493]

and they just HAD to make the leo the "unreasonable" one. God forbid leos are seen as caring and compassionate in Hollywood instead of arrogant and narcissistic 🙄

[@Shark-Fist]

I really hope that we do get a Ouija-esque redemption sequel, because Trevor Henderson's monster designs deserve better

[@Brione30]

“Sorry, I’m an Asparagus”: the Movie

[@lonerdreamer92]

I'm miffed that the designs of the Tarot monsters were wasted; they were conceived by Trevor Henderson, creator of Sirenhead.

[@anonymous-vr5gv]

It really sucks that this movie was garbage. Trevor Henderson is such a talented artist and I was so excited hearing he was designing the monsters for the cards. Extremely wasted on this movie

[@MaddyPerez128]

Omg I didn’t know that. I love him and now I’m so disappointed

[@makhina8839]

Did we all just collectively forgot that Madame Web was this year or something?!

[@AmandaTheJedi]

I would never forget she's my favorite

[@ashleybrooke2087]

Sony was probably hoping this movie would make people forget.

[@mikankitsune0440]

As someone who uses tarot this movie so dumb and hilarious. The readings and meanings are also very incorrect 😂 also, Ned's *"Hell no."* about The Fool/Jester stalking him is an accurate response to that situation

[@Kalyahna]

I rented this and told a friend it was as dumb as I expected but I'm easily entertained so it worked out and his immediate response was "thanks, picking it up now."

[@eroe2742]

Same, I love trash movies

[@logandodson1484]

I fall into the goofy-fun category. The first kill was so fun good / the clown “kill” build-up was fun / and the magician kill was pretty good, too.

[@AmandaTheJedi]

I think if it committed a bit harder to goofy and gave us a better lead this would be near perfect for this level of horror for me

[@QuestionsIAskMyself]

Yeah, the costume design of each monsters was genuinely cool and interesting. But it’s really ruined by the acting and story. The design team was too good for them

[@logandodson1484]

The monster design was sooo good. The priestess was legitimately scary (could have watched a whole movie about her).

[@Chuck_EL]

​@@QuestionsIAskMyself fully agree great mix of cgi and prosthetics

[@wantcinnamon]

The creators must not have had their tarots read or else they would know this would be trash lol

[@Dragonspoetofdeath]

true...problem is, that the creators choose to lean onto the card aspect. The sourcematerial was a book called Horror-scope. But why butcher horoscopes, if you could massacre several esoteric/occult practises? **shrugs**

[@alexv3372]

Ouch Someone get some ice

[@Dragonspoetofdeath]

@@alexv3372 for the burn or as snack for the show?

[@airhead7460]

Watching this movie as someone who actually uses tarot cards and believes in them made me pass away. I personally like to believe that the entire movie wouldn't have happened had the girl just cleansed the energy from the cards when they first used them. It's not 100% true/accurate but whatever

[@AmandaTheJedi]

because of the ritual side of things I don't know if they could have been cleansed but I thought the same thing, like she knew enough that it was bad vibes but didn't bother trying to freshen them up

[@JdeeGeekyGao]

I also read tarot, I would like a copy of this deck to have in my own collection to use, I love the art. But I collect geek/nerdy/fandom based tarot and oracle cards to use in my readings.

[@RealBradMiller]

​@@JdeeGeekyGaoLove the art of the cards, as well! Always wanted the Tarot cards from the HBO show Carnivale.

[@Kalyahna]

@@RealBradMiller So many years later and I'm STILL bitter Carnivale never got a proper ending.

[@reedsylvier5250]

Haven't used my cards in a WHILE but the using other things comment made me think she probably could've used playing cards instead for a limited reading lol

[@slashnyaoi]

the owners of the house and the family from the Conjuring are the same people - ultimate crossover

[@yagmurtuna837]

nope, this is the summer house of that one family that played hide and seek to death with their new DIL as a welcome game on the night they got married.

[@031Productions]

I too will one day own a globe liquor cabinet. It has been a life goal since The Sims 4 was released.

[@Pandatege]

man like this movie is goofy enough to be a good party horror but also i cant help but feel kinda bad for trevor henderson's art being associated with this like first the internet takes sirenhead from him essentially, and now the movie he worked on is getting absolutely *clowned* on just hope the money was good for everyone involved lmao

[@TomSketchit]

Not to mention Mayfair Watchers Society, the mostly unknown, kind of mid podcast that officially uses his creations with his consent. Which, listened to it, some of it I liked, but it's got a lot of weird writing and voice acting.

[@naplockblubba5369]

@@TomSketchit How does a podcast use his creations? As thumbnails or something?

[@TomSketchit]

@@naplockblubba5369 Like, each episode is inspired by a different drawing or creature of his, and the world building is basically "this is a small town that's just sort of used to there being mysterious entities and anomalies that they try to ignore." He's involved in the making of the podcast, it is official for his works, but he's not involved in the writing, and they specifically avoid using any of his more popular creations.

[@naplockblubba5369]

@@TomSketchit Ah

[@cowgirlikepearl]

“midwest princess jams” ok Amanda you’re a chappell roan stan!!!

[@thedashboard9562]

I'm glad you mentioned Ouija: Origin of Evil. This movie seems like the kind of flick Mike Flanagan would make an amazing sequel to.

[@rorygiambalvo2955]

Okay but imagine if it was one of the other variant tarot decks like the flowers one and you just get destroyed by a giant bluebell or something, Jumanji-style.

[@bec7080]

I have that exact globe bar and i got it on Amazon. It's both affordable and sturdy! It's survived for like 15 years!

[@jennyhaslayer1396]

Hasnt even been that long since Amazon but ok

[@waywardmind]

Damn, that's amazing

[@samlewis6487]

​@@jennyhaslayer1396 It literally has. Amazon was founded in 1994 and became popular in the late naughts.

[@ArturGlass.C]

Justice for my girl, the Priestess card. She'll never kill anyone. HOW DARE YOU ?!!

[@milessolomon4864]

Wow! People who briefly glanced at the Wikipedia page for Tarot made a movie!

[@spiderbug7615]

its more like they printed out the wikipedpia page, pissed on it while the ink was still fresh, and then buried it in the backyard before promptly making everything up

[@UJEvans]

"vaguely human shaped splatter." My tea shot out of my nose. lol

[@JordanNone-vj1ps]

I love how Amanda says "truffled" instead of "trifled" 😂 It sounds so much better that way

[@froggyfresh08]

I went to the cinema to rewatch Abigail. The listing was a mistake and they weren’t actually showing it. This was the only other thing showing at the time. I should’ve just went home. At least I was in an empty room so I could vocalise my hatred

[@Chitownbabe417]

It’s okay! Abigail was terrible!

[@froggyfresh08]

@@Chitownbabe417 never speak to me again

[@Chuck_EL]

​​@@Chitownbabe417 literally one of the best horror movies of the year that did goofy horror well

[@LucyLu_meztli]

To each their own preference, I rather watch Tarot for the first time, than rewatch Abigail. Both are nonsense and stupid, but I laughed more at Tarot. The Abigail movie has the characters making nonsense decisions one after the other, that it got a bit annoying… imo. I did like the characters from Abigail more than the Tarot ones, that I’ll admit. Now, if you ask which one I would rewatch, I dunno. I rather just take a 2 hour nap, lol.

[@arashi86]

I'm so glad you got to "oh brother, this guy stinks!" this movie

[@Nicolesid1]

No no Ned tried out a new name in college to 'start over' and so Paxton 😅

[@kristym7149]

Everyone I've seen review this movie unanimously agrees that is just Ned doing some weird stuff while waiting for Peter Parker to fix the timelines

[@mrsmaggiekoch]

Shoutout to Amanda for giving my curious mind that also can't psychologically handle most horror an endless stream of enjoyable horror plot summaries.

[@SN-cj1fn]

I thought she was going to say "Oh no, we've activated the trap card."

[@GilTheDragon]

With the Fool: wolf mauling Early versions of the Marsailles Tarot had the Fool with his danglies dangling out & being bitten by a dog Also the Hangman was also known as The Traitor, especially in the Etteila decks (the first esoteric deck) Also the earnestness might be odd bc if she believed oracles so much then she ought know NOT to touch such a freakyass deck

[@GilTheDragon]

Also for a sequel; judgement would have kickass zombie uprising shit I do guess 21 deaths would have been too much (the world has strong final girl energy)

[@hartthorn]

Wait, at 15:30 ish, your idea is actually kinda brilliant. Do a found footage parody/deconstruction of both true crime and final destination horror. The whole movie is done JUST from the True Crime team's perspective. They're coming in to meet the group of kids that is swearing up and down something weird is happening. Set it up that 2 friends are dead when the call is made, and another died in the time it took to meet up with them. Make it a fairly large crop of victims, so they have 5-7 more to go. True Crime team thinks at minimum they can document the deaths, don't actually believe anything supernatural is happening at first. Victims are freaking out but trying to at least document the events as well as leave "final words" if anything happens. You could tackle so many tropes with this setup. One Victim thinks the True Crime people are vultures. True Crime team eventually turns to believing and is trying to help them. Maybe have one True Crime member try to exploit an emotionally vulnerable Victim to dig for salacious dirt that will boost ratings. I think that'd be some cool shit.

[@reedsylvier5250]

Just wanna add, you can literally use playing cards as tarot, not for the stereotypical smaller higher inclusions (forgot the names) but for the bigger pack which has the exact same system as playing cards just convert the symbols and Google the meanings if needed

[@realbadger]

I totally concur that Creepy is far more effective than Jump Scares. I love writing short-film screenplays that are dark comedies usually with supernatural or paranormal overtones, or outright horror, often with overtones of dark humour. Only one of my scripts has a jump scare, and that script is an adaptation of a friend's short story he asked me to do. Many of these [unproduced] scripts of mine I've submitted to film festivals that have script competitions, and so far all have won numerous Best Of awards (and the latest of these screenplays just received _its_ first win). In another script I have a major creepy moment that's kind of a red herring: the "Oh I _must_ be safe 𝘯𝘰𝘸..." character thought, which usually would be followed by a big jump scare, but here it's followed up with a different [sort of] creepy moment.

[@LSnicket]

Amanda, my wife knows how to read tarot but she doesn't read it anymore. And the reason is that she nailed every reading she did, even if she thought, at the time, the readings were too far off. Her cards are in a box in our living room (bc she said it needed to be in a place where people would circulate) and only me or her can move it. The cards were gifted to her by the person that taught how to read it, an old gypsy woman (and I say gypsy here bc I don't know if she was Romani and in Portuguese it can mean a person that works with tarot, crystals and "magic" in general; it would be similar to what the word witch means in English I think). But, anyways, if you want a reading, I can (maybe, a big maybe) get my wife to do it. And, even if you don't read this or end up not doing the reading with her, if you really want to have a tarot reading, look for people that understand how the reading process is important and have a history with their cards.

[@cherrytree2165]

If I join the KZbin channel that money better be going towards a globe bar cart

[@AmandaTheJedi]

I promise to use money ir(responsible)y to try and find a globe bar

[@marveludus]

Funnily enough, my mother used to do tarot readings (technically mostly Mme. Lenormand cards) professionally! It was quite profitable, but also time consuming. I'm not sure how much I believe in all of it, but I do readings for funsies every once in a while

[@aryaver]

Saw Tarot with my sister after midterms. We grew up on all of the horror, good and bad. In fact sometimes it seemed that the stupider the horror was the more our mom loved it, so I guess it makes sense that we had fun. She liked it for it's nostalgically dumb horror logic, and once I got over how they just gave us the answers in the first 20 minutes I completely agree.

[@clair_di]

This movie is really funny to me because im an aquarius, my mom died when I was young, and I got into tarot because I was having a crisis in the middle of college. I watched this movie with my friends and I joked to them that what if the movie will become our reality because I did a tarot reading on them before XD

[@paulman34340]

The Foll isn't that bad of a Tarot unless you got it REVERSED The Fool is an especially significant card within the tarot as it begets the start of a new journey. It represents spontaneity, possibility, and the endless potential and risk of every adventure.

[@caithenry8429]

They did my favorite card so dirty!!

[@Not_Always]

reversals...no thanks

[@paulman34340]

@@Not_Always Yeah Reverses of any of the cards can be a HUGE negative. If you love the POSITIVE upside versions! Wait till you see the reversed descriptions of each!

[@Not_Always]

@paulman34340 I know all about reversals which is why I don't believe in reading with them lol. All facets are represented and its all about how the card interacts with the others in a spread.

[@babypower14]

dosnt death right side up mark the end of something and start of something else with the reverse being stagnation or something like that

[@KhanaHatake]

As a Capricorn, we are definitely NOT rule breakers!

[@CatbaronAle]

Ok hear me out: liquor cabinet hidden in the Spider-Man standee

[@171QA]

Yay, Ned from Spider-Man didn't die!

[@arrow_of_ravenclaw5155]

Yes. My favorite comedy of the year. I mean, that scene in the bridge felt like something straight out of a parody, right? I went on a Tuesday with my friends and we thought it was hilarious

[@AmandaTheJedi]

my personal favorite was the perfectly sincere delivery of 'Capricorn's are rule breakers, he was in the restricted area!'

[@chelscara]

⁠@@AmandaTheJedijeeze I’m gonna have to watch this just to see how bad the zodiac stereotypes are because traditional stick in the mud pain in the ass Capricorn (it’s my rising so it’s ok I’m just describing myself lmao) is not a rule breaker. That would be literally the next sign over, Aquarius 😂

[@Index_IIIX]

Also I gotta tell someone this: the whole “don’t use someone’s tarot deck” is like not a thing at all. At most it’s the general courtesy we extend to most people’s items (ie. Don’t use someone’s things *without permission*) and some off vibes between you and the cards leading to an inaccurate reading. Me and by bros share and use each others decks frequently enough to know that it’s not a thing whatsoever.

[@teddy-1965]

I have a deck that doesn't vibe with me and only gives me accurate readings if I'm reading for certain people. If it doesn't connect with who I'm reading for (including myself) the readings aren't just inaccurate, they're straight up nonsense. That being said, when I've read for people that the deck does like, the readings have been very accurate.

[@hope-cat4894]

​@teddy-1965 How can you tell when your deck likes someone? Is it for specific personalities or just an awkward feeling that comes out of nowhere?

[@teddy-1965]

@hope-cat4894 for this particular deck it's trial and error. If I try to do a reading for someone and it's giving me nonsense answers and is contradicting itself I know it's not clicking with the person. I've tried to push through a few times with readings for myself in an attempt to bond with the deck and just ended up with a headache. I mostly just leave it at home because I have two decks that have never given me trouble no matter who I'm reading for. It is a shame though because the art is beautiful, it's an Alice in Wonderland deck with artwork based on the original illustrations.

[@kimberlyterasaki4843]

I don't know how you feel about Friday the 13th ripoffs, but In A Violent Nature was a fun experiment if you're interested. It's basically a slasher movie from the perspective of the slasher.

[@AmandaTheJedi]

I saw it at Sundance actually - too slow for me overall because I hate the lumbering killer (my favorite F13 is when it's the mom and the first Halloween causes me a lot of stress when following him around) but cool concept and easily has the most creative slasher kill in history!

[@PawsomePalsPetService]

@@AmandaTheJediright there with you. I was like man someone wanted to make a movie like behind the mask but bad. 😅

[@msnorringtonsims6536]

We’ve activated the stars! 😂😂

[@realbadger]

As a Taurus I was greatly annoyed by the completely wrong aspects attributed to an alleged Taurus character who consistently behaves as a Libra...

[@AnaSofia-xe2wg]

Excuse you??? As a libra, I take offence

[@samlewis6487]

Oh come off it, horoscopes are literally written to be so vague that anyone could be anything

[@realbadger]

@samlewis6487 I'm referring to zodiac trait aspects, which is different than horoscopes.

[@megashima]

​@@realbadger what is the difference?

[@realbadger]

@megashima Horoscopes is divination. Zodiac character traits is how peoples' zodiac sign is part of their character. Taurean are patient, logical, somewhat hedonistic (tactile and sensual), while say, Sagittarians can be li'l flighty, particularly in relationships. Libra are generally loyal to regular friends but tend to become controlling and domineering in significant other mode. Horoscopes are "you'll meet a tall, handsome stranger" kind of thing.

[@ZombieGravitation1]

It's funny my mom has one of those globe bar things but we use it to store dog things including treats lol

[@spookyspice596]

I've been a tarot reader since pandemic and somehow I just knew I was going to cringe at the inaccuracies at this movie.

[@chelscara]

11:00 final destination did it horrifyingly well with the floss death and bad horror movies have been trying to redo it ever since

[@BandFairy]

"I love potentially life-saving adventure. We can get snacks!" Amanda, I have never related to you more.

[@darnellabbott335]

This movie was definitely in the dumb, goofy fun category for me, and I'm glad you got a couple chuckles out of it! And I noticed your extra editing and camera effects! Stay awesome, and love the new details in your always amazing reviews/analysis 😌

[@kronk2.094]

What actually makes me sad about this movie is its concept actually HAD enough potential for being at the very least kind of solid (the idea behind the story itself is interesting, the tarots' aesthetics is pretty neat...). I could see through the whole thing how easily it could turn into some sort of Annabelle Creation 2.0, had that kind of effort been put in the development. But unfortunately... 😩

[@gwhite002]

I’m in the middle of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure and I cannot take these arcana cards seriously without thinking of all the silly Stands 🤣

[@sharonhutch9370]

I think we have a Ouija situation here. Bad first movie, fantastic prequel

[@matthewpeterson2917]

A buddy of mine has a globe liquor cabinet. Highly recommend.

[@GarthTheDestroyer]

This is the weirdest adaptation of The House of the Dead I've ever seen. The Hanged Man didn't even have bat wings!

[@LunaDelTuna]

It's exactly the plot line that the movie Cabin in the Woods was making fun of

[@DoomdayProphet]

me and my folks went to see it because the guy who did the designs for the cards and the monsters is an acquaintance of mine, so we wanted to support. i went in expecting cool monsters, came out with cool monsters, fun kills, and beloved Paxton - so i consider that a net win! i can see this becoming someone's favorite bad horror movie, for sure. some spooky middle schooler is gonna love this and further their spookiness, and i love that for them

[@Hazeljv3]

"He's an earth sign, they found him in the dirt!" legit sounds like a line Rachel Sennott's character in Bodies Bodies Bodies would have said. But that was a satire. And Rachel Sennott.

[@bella-bond]

I absolutely LOVE your commentary and I relate so hard to yelling at the characters for making stupid decisions

[@dezd4551]

"Combining horoscopes and tarot is the most powerful form of divination" absolutely sent me, I had to pause the movie for a couple minutes Context: i hate astrology

[@Not_Always]

funnier still that tarot isn't used for horoscopes like that.

[@filmfangirls9163]

The characters did make me laugh more than I expected and they were SO stupid 😂 I started to think it was more of a satire but I knew it was trying to be serious lol

[@spacecow149]

A killer Zoltar movie would be cool

[@cpkgrownup9496]

“We can get snacks!” I want that on a T-shirt😅

[@caithenry8429]

...am I going to watch this film? Probably not unless its on sale. But do I want a copy of those tarot cards? Oh absolutely. They would be the perfect foil to my Mystical Cats tarot deck!!

[@NeloBladeOfRanni]

Same I want a copy of the cards to contrast with my witches tarot set + my light seers tarot 😂

[@inklingofadream]

I got so excited at the true crime rules thing thinking they were going to go for a cheesy parody of the horror movie rules scene from Scream :(

[@FiredUpFiron]

I would honestly pay to see a sequel and/or prequel simply because the piece that could be used to continue the story in some way sounds a lot more interesting than how the plot of Tarot turned out.

[@fourcatsandagarden]

tbh that whole backstory on how the cards came to be just feels pretty freaking realistic. people in the late 1800s were obsessed with that shit but would also readily clutch their pearls and go 'how dare!'

[@Whatlander]

"That was a close one; I almost gave the killers good advice" makes me so happy. Perfect delivery, too.

[@andreagriffiths3512]

10:47 true story, I fell into my bathtub after avoiding a trip over my beloved cat. Fortunately my big toe hit the rim of it and saved me from staving in my head on the taps. So instead of a nasty head wound that could have been potentially fatal, I had a broken toe.

[@justacrystal567]

I had my tarot cards read exactly once. Summer break during college, my two best friends and I were hanging out at my house and one of them decided to read our tarot cards. The third friend got pretty standard or good fortune. But when my cards were drawn, I got all of the worst cards! The devil, swords, upside down, death, etc. my friend doing the reading was so freaked out, she dumped almost An entire saltshaker down on them. She was so freaked out and upset/sorry about giving me a bad fortune, but I just laughed my ass off! Love her to pieces. Seeing as it’s been almost 2 decades, I think I’m in the clear from whatever future she read.

[@Splendiferous42]

I love it when you post a video on a film I have no intention of watching, so I can enjoy the whole thing in one go 😀

[@earthiswatching]

Kinda amused that the example of a "super bloody" card didn't look that far off from the standard Rider-Waite version.

[@elinorwahl8619]

Thank you so much for reviewing this! Terrible horror films can be a joy, and I hope you had a blast 😄

[@katburgess5926]

Can I use this movie to explain to my friend why I don't do horoscopes?

[@Whatlander]

Ever since "Tell Me How I Die," I've really wanted to see the concept of dueling psychics done really well, whether it's sillier or scarier. I'm still waiting on that movie to exist, but this was a fun video to watch!

[@MeggyGeez]

I love watching movies with you 😂 the commentary is always on point!

[@JdeeGeekyGao]

I'd happily do you a tarot reading. I've been doing readings since 96/97 my mother taught me, I don't have normal tarot cards though, but I have a small selection of geeky/nerdy decks from Supernatural to Final Fantasy VII. I do live in another country, definitely not local to you. I promise I won't predict your untimely demise.

[@vatsan16]

woa first ever time i am watching a video 25 seconds after it was released

[@anneonomous4910]

Good job buddy!!