An Adoption Story (S1): Nina's Story - Adopted from St Petersburg, Russia to Rochester, NY

[@iamfromthewild]

I was adopted to! Your story is almost exactly like mine and very comferting to hear thank you. When i was around 16 i went back and actually met my mom and sister in russia! Most emtionaly intense thing i have ever done. Also russia is such a cool place to have a connection to!

[@sasharemez7373]

I am so drawn to these adoption stories. I wasn’t adopted. As a kid we visited an orphanage and brought some gifts. On one side of the big room the group I was with was standing and across from us was the group of orphans. When I looked them in the eyes I felt what they felt; I felt their pain of rejection and abandonment. I grew up in a big family and my parents were always in a survival mode because we were poor in the Soviet Union. I didn’t get the attention and love I needed, so I even work parents a child can grow up feeling rejected and abandonment. I know it’s not the same, but I can relate to this pain on some level. As a kid after that visit I dreamed of building a big house and taking those kids and giving them love and support. This is still my dream. I am going to do that after my kids get older.

[@ChellenBobby]

Wow same here well not really my mom had a rough life her mom had 6 kids then her sister died and she took in her 7 kids so my grandmom had 13 kids in the home and my mom didn't get alit of attention or love as a kid so when she had us she thought us that there are people who have less than us but most of the people who don't have keep smiles on there face and don't do that poor me thing so me my mom and my little sister always said if we ever came into a good amount of money we would buy a factory or old school or hotel or something big like that and make it a home like room and a bath room in each one and make a few one room or 2 room apartments and take in teens because it seems like no adopts teens but they can live there we would take care of them and teach them life skills and the apartment rooms would be to teach them to learn how to live in there own and they could save all of there money while with us so they could live good lives and also to take teen mom's and there babies because I was a teen mom but I had mom others don't have anyone and they dont have anyone to teach them how to care for them selves much less a baby but seeing your comment brought all that back my mom passed away on October 19th,2022 at age 50 from her 3rd round of cancer but even now if i ever come into money like that I will still do that because it means so much to me I'm so thankful I had a loving caring kind mom who loved me more then she loved her self and when I got pregnant at 15 she made sure I knew my life was not over and I still do what ever I wanted or what I set my mind to I graduated highschool got a great job and took care of my son who was 2 when I graduated then my niece who was born a month after I graduated but we did nothing but love eachother and took care of each other I feel so bad when I see story's where young women are having babies were and still are being forced to give there babies up against there will so sad... I hope and pray one day it all changes and there is all love in the world .

[@sissyrayself7508]

I wish you and your son nothing but the best.​@@ChellenBobby

[@Maria-fm1tj]

Nina, I’m Russian, but now I'm living in the USA. And I should say that childhood in the USA is much more useful for children. It's very hard to grow up in Russia. It's very difficult and stressful school atmosphere, and all circumstances. So, it’s a magic to be adopted from orphanages because these children doesn’t have a chance for happy life. Your American parents gave you happiness to grow up in the happiness. ❤ Be proud of them, you are kind and strong girl 🙏

[@anikomattison7568]

The easy way is not the best way. When we have difficulties that’s when we learn

[@irinap7389]

If she or other adopted children feel so happy in their families, why so they feel the need to go and see those relatives that gave them up?

[@KimKincaid-mc9ht]

Dear sweet Nina, embrace your blessings of having been adopted and loved!

[@siobhan7798]

Thank you Nina, thank you Alex. Nina you are a beautiful mature young woman, wishing you all the best in your future. Thanks so much for sharing this. From an adoptive mum in Ireland .

[@IvánGastañaga]

Thank you Nina for sharing your beautiful story and for inspiring more adoptees to talk about their international adoption lives and experiencies.

[@alexgilbert]

Thank you Ivan for your comment on Nina’s story. When I’m back, you’re story is next bro!

[@moreinterference]

This is a terribly underrated channel.

[@kikomarty4337]

Amazing story, heartbreaking at around 17 minutes but very brave. It's good to see you doing well now.

[@Peace.Beyond.All.Understanding]

Loved this! Nina has such a deep authenticity in her, she’s so cool

[@figureitouttalk]

I am adopted from Ivanovo Russia. I was only 11 months old when I was adopted, I live in the US now

[@nataliella97]

so I think I've commented enough for it to be obvious that I love these videos, but the bit at the grocery store honestly made me tear up a bit! russian bulk candies have the same emotional weight as proust's cookie I swear

[@elinabiryukova670]

Thank you for your story, Nina. Just amazed how strong and deep you are!

[@saint333s]

I've adopted my son's baby and he looks identical to his dad in every way. People ask me if this is hard since my son died 3 months before his baby was born. To ME it was amazing as it was like bringing my son up all over again.I feel like I'm VERY lucky to have a part of my child to bring up. I always feel for these kids. They are fortunate to have someone to care for them as I also adopted my son's babies siblings. It's been allot but I wouldn't change it for anything.❤I wish the best for any child that's been through this. 🫂🩷

[@Ang3Mc2050]

From a fellow adoptee, it is so special to connect with these stories, such as Nina's. You all have a big place in my heart ❤

[@alexgilbert]

Thank you for watching my series. Means a lot. Nina's story sure is a powerful one!

[@laurapowell7384]

November 2024 seeing this. Oh Nina what a beautiful soul, a gift and light to the world. Peace

[@jenniferfenlason8975]

I cried when I heard your bio mother terminated your twin sister's little life. I'm so very sorry. I thank you for giving your sister a voice. She deserves that you sweet and loving girl. I also cried when you mentioned that they just stuck you in a back room and didn't feed you. How horrible to do that to an innocent little one. To not give you love and comfort is cruel whether sickly and likely to die or not. I am very happy you survived and bring joy to your family and the world. My husband and I have 3 young kids: two daughters and a son. We have always discussed possibly adopting. We would love to in the near future and have an open adoption so they can be in their bio child's life. I worked for Juvenile Court for years and Adoption Day was the most enjoyable thing we got to experience!

[@teachersasha9596]

My heart goes out to you, Nina. Thank you for sharing your story

[@greggentry3793]

Nina, you were great! Thank you for sharing your story and I look forward to meeting you soon! :-)

[@moyasheehy8508]

Wonderful story about Nina!!!!

[@8656737s]

This poor girl glad she has siblings ❤

[@Ka-ly8oi]

Alex is such a good listener, very present and empathatic and kind.

[@cindymartin2676]

Nina. Your story is amazing. Glad to have you living in our city.

[@CarterKey6]

I’m a parent but I studied genetics and I almost wonder if a twin losing the sibling could be worse than a child. Context I’ve always thought nothing could be worse than losing a child but knowing the shared DNA of identical twins I almost think it could be more devastating:

[@lauriemogianesi3571]

Your program Alex is so helpful for adoptee’s.I really enjoy your show/ documentary .I learned a lot!

[@chrystalcook3239]

Another healing watch, love these 💝

[@globetrotter6127]

It should be interesting you add the present life of the adoptees , what are they doing for living , who are their family in US, etc…I mean how much they are integrated and have a way of life. Good video. New suscribi

[@rosecarrier5776]

I love these story’s. I’m kinda adopted. Probably why I like the videos. What I’m saying is my grandmother raised me when I was six months old. My mother didn’t want me. Same with my dad. 😢 They known my grandmother loves baby’s and never even told me who my mom was. Just assume that I already known. But I did not know tell I was like 8 or 9 years old. I told my mom she is not my mom. That she can’t tell me what to do. She was mean to me too. She just wanted 2 kids. My little sister and my little brother. But I lived with my older brother and 2 big sisters. 1 brother died of cancer when I was 2 years old and he was 4 years. He died on my bday and my mother blamed me for it. My little brother and sister was also mean to me growing up. I was bullied. Then found out there my brother and sister and who my mom and dad is. It was a lot to dig in. As I gotten older I actually started to help my little brother and sister in school. It created a bond. They was still mean to me at times. I have a learning disability. Takes me a bit to understand something. So they would make fun of me for it. But I ignored it and would still help them. I’m the big sis I need to help. That’s what I felt like. Eventually I was pushed to the side more. Grandma it felt like she no longer loved me too because I’m not a little kid anymore. Found out I was also used for $ so it hurt. I never told the school about me being abused and used. I feel like I should have. I was graduating high school and no one ever came. Kids laughing no one was there for me. I was sad and depressed. Knowing I have no one. It’s just me. Then I was stuck at home with my grandma and my aunt. We lived in low income housing and I wanted a job. I begged for a job. Well they said I can’t. It will make rent higher. But I offered to pay rent. They said no. I left. This was a big mistake for me. I got into a relationship and rushed to live with him. I was gone I didn’t say I was gonna stay but I did. I left almost everything behind. He was also an abusive person. Bad relationship. I loved him. I felt like I had to stay with him and that he would change. Nope. He just used me. I left. End up being homeless. I did get into a relationship again and he loves me. He takes care of me and we got married. He is Japanese. I always said I love the Japanese. Even as a little kid. My grandmother was not to happy about it. Still not. While my mom. She keeps saying get pregnant. But I don’t talk to her anymore. She was never there for me and not caring for me. I won’t let her see my baby when I have one. Also I won’t have a baby tell the time is right. I’m going at my paste. My brothers and sisters. We all talk we now have a great bond. I don’t feel much like an outsider anymore with them. We all left are mom and dad. We all are there for each other. They still live in are home town. While I’m 2hrs away. But I think it’s best for me to be far. I’m making my own life. I’m still bullied a lot. But I ignore it. I’m an adult. I know bullying shows there still a kid. That they need to grow up. I’m not going to put myself down anymore. I’m not gonna blame me anymore. I’m me and I love me. ❤

[@AnnetteMurphyger]

Spasibo Alex u Nina

[@rgomoffat]

It may be helpful for Nina to see a therapist. And work through all of these intense emotions.

[@AnnetteMurphyger]

Срасибо Алеж и Нина

[@christopherlamitie3506]

Rochester is not in upstate New York. It is in western New York.

[@FeministBuzzkill]

It's also upstate.

[@EuniceStone-s9j]

Are these children orphans or abandoned or surrendered??

[@alexgilbert]

Many of the children from Russia, like myself were surrendered but many of us adoptees were abandoned too. It's all different with every situation of course.

[@artyomgordeev7563]

If you'll some time visit Moscow, I'd love to show you the city and the language 🎈 just reply here

[@meypuim2951]

I have one child and thought about giving her a sibling but im in my early forties already and i dont want to go through with labor. I dont think i can ever adopt a child. You do your best for them and love and care for them but it seems in the end, they end up trying to find their birth parents, the ones who abandoned them. It happened to my cousin who was adopted at birth straight from the womb into the arms of my aunt. She tried to connect with her birth parents but that didnt go well for her and now she is estranged from my aunt. The birth parents gave you up because they didnt want you. They are fortunate that they got adopted by american parents. There is risk for the parents who decide to adopt children. You devote your life caring for them only to lose them in the end. There is also risk for raising your own biological children. 50/50 chance they turn out to be decent human beings.

[@paulettemiller7237]

"...they didn't want you" is probably not true and an unfair statement. As a former social worker, I can attest that was rarely the situation.

[@meypuim2951]

@@paulettemiller7237 that is a fair statement, it's not always true but it's a reason for giving up on the child.

[@tessmoore3762]

Just because an adopted child wants to know their roots and find out why they were given up and meet some of their birth family doesn't mean they are rejecting or are ungrateful for the parents who adopted them and raised them. If you raise them and train them to be kind, caring, and thankful, because you are that way with them, then they will be that way. If you then support them in their desire for information, they will know you love them and they will love you for respecting who they are. Many times there are sad circumstances surrounding the giving up of the child. They don't all want to, some have no choice. You can't assume they all just rejected the child and didn't want them.

[@cheapskatepanic]

I'm very glad you have taken the time to think about your feelings on birth parents and your insecurities about it. Adoption is definitely not for you and it's great that you know that before you adopt and possibly cause damage to a child. (Sounds worse than I'm meaning to sound). Many families become broken over adoptive parents feelings of jealously or possessiveness and it's so sad.

[@meypuim2951]

@@cheapskatepanic of course. My aunt ended up having biological kids after adopting my cousin. My cousin was hurt by the way my aunt treated her compared to the rest of the kids. It psychologically damaged her to this day. I have a good relationship with my aunt. But I am really the only relative or family that my cousin has left. To make things worse, my uncle died and she was close to him. After he died, her life just spiraled downwards. She has been in and out of relationships and always dated the wrong men in her life and had children with different partners. But yes, it depends on the adopted parent and how they raise them. I could never do what my aunt did. But just from this video alone, it seems some adopted kids are just broken even though they had good adoptive parents. I believe it really depends on the child's personality and how the child copes with it.

[@hellokitty_hola]

girl., go visit Ukraine, to see the true russian culture .

[@AnnetteMurphyger]

Do you speak Russian, Nina?