Applying The No Contact Rule Correctly

So many people who are applying the "no contact rule" after a breakup do it the wrong way. Most of the wrong information comes from those "get my ex back" programs you find on the Internet, and those programs typically instruct you to do this in a way where it comes off as weak & needy, ultimately resulting in men losing their opportunity to re-attract their ex back.
In this Attraction Tips video I'm going to breakdown the no contact rule & describe exactly how you should apply it to your own situation after a breakup, as a way to begin re-attracting your ex & ultimately get your ex back. #NoContact #ExBack #ReAttraction #NoContactRule #BreakUp
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If you would like to book me for private one-on-one relationship/dating coaching, please visit: www.skillofattr...
At Skill of Attraction I provide dating tips & relationship advice for men and help facilitate a woman's growing attraction in their romantic life to where it's relatively effortless.
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In this Attraction Tips video I explain how to apply the no contact rule in the correct way to have the highest possibility to get your ex back, or worse case scenario, be able to move-on from a failed relationship with dignity & keeping your self-respect.
Women will never respect you if you beg, plead & chase them after they have broken-up with you. Women are very attracted to emotional strength in a man. So, by walking away while leaving the door open, it's actually giving you your best shot to get your ex back in a way where it's her idea.
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You may also want to check out my other videos--
"Will My Ex Forget About Me During No Contact?":
• Will My Ex Forget Abou...
"Best Way to Get My Ex Back":
• Best Way to Get Your E...
"Getting Your Ex Back: Let It Happen":
• Getting Your Ex Back: ...
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• After a Breakup Never ...
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[@SkillofAttraction]

For questions to be answered in the comments, please give a "super thanks" or head over to my website & ask there. 𝕊𝕜𝕚𝕝𝕝 𝕆𝕗 𝔸𝕥𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 Men's Advice Community: soa.fm Private relationship/dating coaching: soa.fm/dating-relationship-coaching/ Questions or feedback: soa.fm/contact/ Get Your Ex Back: 45dayreattraction.com ✔ SOA APPROVED COACHING PROGRAMS 𝗙𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘀 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗕𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗳𝗶𝘁𝘀 How To Get A Sex Buddy: bit.ly/3Mitohu 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗰𝗿𝗮𝗺𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗿 Turn a Girl Friend into a Girlfriend: bit.ly/3Kf9EJt 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗮𝗼 𝗢𝗳 𝗕𝗮𝗱𝗮𝘀𝘀 How To Attract ANY Woman: bit.ly/35Jyx0W 𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝘅 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 Get The Sex Life You Deserve: bit.ly/3K9bI5V

[@alaalfa8839]

I would argue that, yes women like confident men but they don't crave some perfect guy, but they fall in love with an imperfect guy who tells her story about overcoming himself or stopping some bad habits that helped him achieve something, because it sounds much more authentic and genuine that he found himself etc then some "perfect" idol version that television shows, which is unauthentic and unrealistic. that it sounds like a superhero who was born perfect with perfect intelligence.

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@alaalfa8839 I cover that "perfect is boring" in other videos, but what you're saying here is coming dangerously close to proving yourself, which I cover here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/iZ2no6GdocppqKM

[@marcyallison5996]

Never contact someone who dumped you. Never!!! Don't be a fool.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Exactly!

[@ch1bob]

What if after 40 days No Contact (5 days before her bday) i noticed she unblocked me from whatsapp.. but i didnt txt her.. i wonder if she wanted me to wish her happy bday..and if it was a test to see if i remembered and still cared? Or just to reinforce her ego if i did? I almost texted her but everyone told me not to so i contained myself..but now i live in regret a week later.. thinking maybe i lost my one oportunity to rekindle..thoughts? Am i too far gone? Am i just delusional thinking i could reconnect?

[@SkillofAttraction]

You did the right thing by NOT contacting her. It's possible that she unblocked you so she would hear from you but, if that's the case, that only means that she's missing you too. You didn't miss your opportunity. Your opportunity is when she takes the initiative & directly contacts you. She has to get to a point where she feels that she might lose you forever unless she does something about it. Stay strong & focus on yourself. In fact, move on. She won't let you get away if she loves & values you. The more you wait for her & pine for her, the longer it will take for her to reach out...but she will only reach out if she still has strong enough feelings for you & misses you enough.

[@ch1bob]

@@SkillofAttraction truth hurts and i guess u are right..its been 2 months NC this week and i cant help but think she will never contact me. I wonder if i should at least wish happy new years but i guess not.

[@SkillofAttraction]

No, you should not contact her for any reason until she initiates first. That's your anxiety talking, trying to give you excuses to break no contact. If you do break it & she's not ready, you will essentially be starting from square one. She will not forget about you. And just so you know, I've had exes come back 4, 5 months later...years later in one case. If she truly loves & values you, she will not let you get away permanently.

[@rdsieben]

"Even in one case, sometimes years". Funny you should say that. My ex-fiance dumped me for someone else and moved far away from me about 23 years ago. Then 19 years later she searched for me on the internet and found me and she called me and was in tears of what she did to me and wanted me back in her life. At that time, I was already seeing someone else. Moral of my story... you don't want to wait 19 years for her to come back.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Very similar to the woman I was referring to. Though, we weren't engaged...more like the "one that got away". She came back appx 15 years later, completely out of the blue.

[@marcyallison5996]

It took her 19years?? Glad you found someone else.

[@rdsieben]

Marcy Allison that someone else is my ex wife. She is dead to me.

[@marcyallison5996]

Good way to look at it.

[@Blktxdom2004]

My situation will be unique as I have a son with her. I’m going to say let her burn her bridges. I’m not going to even acknowledge her. I will encourage you to keep the current relationship and ignore her.

[@goingaboutmyfathersbusines4359]

I use the no contact for me to heal...not to get someone back. When I'm done I'm done...especially with ghosters...they are the worst of the dating pool...cowardly, weak and selfish...who the hell has time for that? ...i deserve better...i use the no contact to better myself...so when the right one comes along. I have already gone through the healing process....and can truly give 100% of MY heart

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's great! No contact is best used for exactly that...to heal & better yourself. If an ex comes back, realizing that they made a mistake, then that's a nice bi-product of no contact.

[@orubek355]

I agree. How are you now girl?

[@ashg4045]

Your name is brilliant

[@sipe254]

You dont have enough time to wait for mr perfect, woman. The clock is ticking and the wall is getting closer by the day. 😉

[@mrs.camillewarrenempress3115]

It's funny I had a girl that I am seeing for 3 months to 4 months.. she rejected my date offer. I am Done For Good Now.. I am done texting and messaging .. I unfollow her from Instagram as well. Moving on to more better myself to be the best person I can be

[@The_Compilation_Channel]

Whenever I have the urge to text my ex I think that she’s the one who left me! Why would I want to be with someone who left me for whatever apparent reason that was not talked about or considered to be worked out? Why!? Just take what you learned from the relationship and improve on the next. If she does contact don’t engage unless it’s genuine and she is willing to fess up and apologize for the hurt she caused then you should consider getting back with her.

[@SkillofAttraction]

You're exactly right, however I wouldn't expect an apology. Just make sure she puts in the effort to win YOU back before you allow yourself to become too involved.

[@Agriculturingabetterworld]

no contact rule is also applicable to the one whom you lend the money..

[@vannhelsin2434]

😂😂😂😂

[@monas]

😂

[@jhonhernandario2335]

Yes .... it did

[@ghulamrasul6506]

😂😂😂😂

[@karinamontes1539]

Plenty Fish in the Sea Ladies" eventually you will find someone wayyy better who don't wanna hurt you and will love you and respect you 💙

[@wildmanauh]

What defines hurt? If your man is sometimes stressed at work and becomes a bit agitated hurtful to you? Will you reciprocate the love and respect always? will your love and respect be conditional? Will you surrender at the first bump? Maybe second? Keep looking for that elusive man that women of modern society created in their minds, you might be regretting your life choices when you're at the edge of your grave.

[@nigherrrrh]

Plenty of fish in the Sea Men but still she's the one

[@rogerj.hernandez2812]

Why be with someone who does not want to be with you- Plenty Of Fish in Sea! Move Forward!

[@SkillofAttraction]

Exactly!

[@markf8871]

I think the main idea is to keep yourself from pushing her even farther away, giving her time to let go of the bad and think of the past good things and hopefully miss you enough to contact you again.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, definitely part of it. What no contact is REALLY for is, for you so you can heal & move on. An ex coming back after a no contact period is simply a nice byproduct of that.

[@lilkrayjones6322]

This type of no contact rule is the best , not contacting your x unless she/he will be the one you will initiate the contact first atleast you can move on and make your self better than before and if your x will see the new you, you will be more confident to ignore or play mind games with them ....

[@juanmora9332]

Hey man if your woman left you pleas don't take her back because she is going to leave you again just go find somebody new pleas don't do the same mistake that I did believe she will leave again

[@youcefnoui9711]

Juan Mora to

[@laurenshulsteede4889]

Why? Is my ex the same woman as yours? Are we the same person? Dont think so

[@sipe254]

@@laurenshulsteede4889 You are the type of idiots who learn things the hard way. Go ahead and you will see for yourself

[@annamiljevic8632]

Then ya should have treated her better.

[@samhines5084]

She should ask me to go on a date because you should be an alpha male and not be putting her on a pedestal especially if she ended it with you

[@rosemariecooksey6574]

My husband left me a week ago he said he need space its really hurts ive done nothing wrong he was inlove with me and suddenly he changed telling me he doesnt love me anymore 😔😢😢 we got married 5 months ago 😢😢😢 and were in a long distance relationship Watching from phillipines thank you for this video ❤

[@SkillofAttraction]

I'm sorry you're going through this. If he says that he needs space it's important that you give it to him no matter how much it hurts. Emotions change like the wind & if you give him some space & time to miss you, things just may turn around. Be careful not to let your anxiety about the situation & your emotions get the best of you. Let him come to you. In the meantime, you will want to occupy your time & mind with self improvement & your passions. This will keep your mind occupied, help with rebuilding your confidence & give an opportunity to grow. Stay strong, keep busy & do not initiate any contact with him until he reaches out to you first. And thanks for watching!

[@rosemariecooksey6574]

@@SkillofAttraction thank for the advice ❤❤❤

[@toxicspamsl2yt19]

@@rosemariecooksey6574 what happened

[@0ddman1]

Most honest coach but few likes ..👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 good job thou🙌🏽

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks man!

[@0ddman1]

Skill of Attraction plz I need help I broke up early last month cos she pulled away frm me.... she wished me hbd early last month been on no contact for like 25days and her birthday is dis week ...should I reach out to her?

[@SkillofAttraction]

If she broke up with you, I'd say that you should definitely not contact her on her bday, or any holiday for that matter. However, since you initiated the breakup, & assuming that you're interested in her still, then yes it's a good idea to wish her a HBD. In the future, I don't recommend ending things with a girl simply because she pulled away. Girls will ALWAYS pull away from time to time. Just give her the same treatment when she does this. I just uploaded a video on this about a week or 2 ago. You should check it out if you haven't already. Good luck!

[@3rdeyegoddb.y.s.records]

This Is By Far The Realest Advice on the Tube ✌️🤩✌️

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thank you!

[@EJayyDreadHead]

Well this worked for me now we're back together! this method always works* only 7 days she called me while I was busy

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's great man! Thanks for sharing your outcome! As long as a woman still has attraction for you, & you stay busy mostly focused on you & your self improvement, , it will work. Great job!

[@EJayyDreadHead]

@@SkillofAttraction yes sir! That's right my mind wasn't even on her and she called made my day yesterday now we're spending some time together Thursday* people need to understand attraction builds up in space! Its normal for a human being to feel that loss

[@EJayyDreadHead]

@@SkillofAttraction also where people mess up trying to get they their partner back.. . they continuously let the anxiety get to them or get angry😡 ... . But when you just forget about the toxic situation and focus on self-improvement that's when the exes come back and start wondering... .😰 I also did radio slience that's a very powerful method as well

[@SkillofAttraction]

Great job, man! The reason why is because you're not putting out that needy, desperate, pining vibe. Instead you're putting out a "it's her loss" vibe. Just be sure that you do not stop working on self improvement because she's contacting you again. Many men make that mistake.

[@EJayyDreadHead]

@@SkillofAttractionmy attention will be on self-care i will not get to comfortable focusing on her that's when drama occurs .. I was doing that in the beginning but after doing research I am a better person. So for now I will have her doing 100% calling and texting

[@teamsafetysalesteamsafetys9571]

coach, i really thank u for what you did on Info, honestly i keep listening and listening most your info. I think one thing i need to learn that, nonthing can last forever. All you can control is yourself. if someone want to leave it nothing u can do. You must let them go !!, sound easy ? yes, but in real life it not. so u must learn and prepare.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, it's difficult to accept that you can't control what other people do & or think; especially when you feel that you did everything right, or you went above & beyond your duty as a boyfriend or romantic partner. But you're right...all you can do is to let them go; not necessarily from your heart, but let go of the attachment that you have to the outcome. It's a mindset, really. It's about training your thoughts about the situation. I highly recommend practicing the 'law of attraction'. You can find many videos on that topic on KZbin. Do a search for "Abraham Hicks"...she's my favorite teacher of LOA.

[@glennoropeza3545]

I wish picking up and developing a relationship wasn't so complicated, I have a problem with moving on to the next woman! Life is better single and simple!

[@SkillofAttraction]

It's only complicated because we've all been taught & conditioned to believe something that doesn't actually work in real life. As you go through my videos, or begin to read some recommended books ( www.skillofattraction.com/books/ ), the light bulbs in your head will begin to go on & you'll learn what really works with women & why. Then it;s just a matter of reconditioning yourself to the point where it isn't work anymore. Yes, it takes some time & some hard work initially, but it's better than a life of feeling powerless with women, & with people in general.

[@thegreatestislove8604]

I went no contact for almost two years with my friend. I didn’t even give her an explanation why. She showed up at my door apologizing and said she changed but after a week I’m already seeing old signs that she doesn’t see me as an equal or care about what I have to say and subtly dropping insults as well as trying to take the credit for my accomplishments since I went my separate way lol I realize now I have made a huge mistake. I should have told her to leave. I’m probably going to wait for her to say something horrible about me like before and tell her to not contact me again. Hopefully she won’t show up ever again. Long story short....They DONT change whether it’s a friend or spouse. Find someone better. You’re worth it.

[@SkillofAttraction]

People not changing is true to some extent. People can become a better version of themselves, but only if they truly want to (Most people don't see any reason to improve themselves). However, who they are won't change much, if at all. So, if you're incompatible, it will never work no matter how physically attractive they are or how great the sex is. It's almost always best to move on & find someone who is better & gives you the love & respect that you deserve.

[@thegreatestislove8604]

Skill of Attraction I couldn’t agree more. Thanks for the wonderful advice.

[@Blktxdom2004]

After she slept with another man in the house I shared with her and my son, I DON’T WANT HER BACK!!! In the divorce hearing, I will implement the no contact rule until the divorce is finalized...then I will make it permanent. She is a narcissistic woman who uses me like a toy. I’m going to be forced to terminate my parental rights because of the treacherous behavior.

[@SkillofAttraction]

That sucks man! I'm glad to hear that you have the balls to send her packing though. A lot of men don't. I hope you don't give up your son just because she's a nutcase, however.

[@Blktxdom2004]

@Skill of Attraction - I have been stressed over this as this my third and I will add: FINAL MARRIAGE! In order for anyone to promise marriage, they must wear a collar of ownership and have it in the contract that they will pay an exorbitant amount to be released from the collar (including the divorce). It sounds crazy, I know...but I grow sick - ACTUALLY NAUSEATED - at the fact that narcissistic women like my soon-to-be ex can stoop to such behavior as I mentioned above. The culture of today has become one where feelings are paramount, and reason / reality is warped. (Example quote: 'What about me? What about ME?') She will push for sole custody...like my previous marriage, and if all else fails, use her new lover (Rich As all get out) to fund for the termination process. (My first marriage didn't have this take place until my second marriage was ending, ironically.) I might end up using the collar contract and risk being called crazy. At least I know where I stand. Thanks for your advice, and will try to keep in touch.

[@SkillofAttraction]

I agree...there's really not much reason for men to be married these days. I don't know what the divorce laws are where you live, but from my understanding, as far as the children go, the law mostly cares about the best interest of the children. Hopefully you have a sympathetic judge.

[@annaleahabubo6976]

Thats called self respect 😃. Best decision 👌

[@benjaminnielsen4288]

I've never felt so broken over a woman in my life... She walked away from me and over to someone else. Said she wanted him. I walked away. She blocked me, unblocked me, blocked me, unblocked me and reached out, then breadcrumbed me, then blocked me and later unblocked me. Reached out again with more BS and then blocked me again a few days ago. Funny thing is, I do respond to her but I never reach out. She blocks me again. She's with this new fella and yet still has me in her mind. For hell's sake you little b*tch, I'm letting go... stop kicking me when im down and just let me die in peace.

[@SkillofAttraction]

You might find this video helpful: kzbin.info/www/bejne/laWtpqSFeb6Ze7s

[@pam9657]

my last message to him was about 10pm last night... he messaged me GM and I ignored it... it's only 3:02 pm the next day and I feel like i'm going to lose it... any body else understand me? lol

[@leeboss4152]

Of course

[@leviet7736]

Your mind tell you the right thing. Move on please

[@adamjosephboutaleb7519]

I'm going through the same thing right now. I fucking hate the feeling and I feel like my heart is being ripped apart.

[@rinkashimi9410]

Help

[@ConservativeJuggaloPodcast]

Jamerican Queen yea been there done that but u need to keep ur mind occupied

[@inezholmes6367]

Hello I like how you've answered our questions by not stringing us along. All my best to you. I just feel so bad he dumped me without a cause and I really wish he would contact me so him and I can talk things out. I feel strongly, hom and I need to talk!

[@SkillofAttraction]

I understand how difficult it is. Believe me, if I haven't been through this so many times I wouldn't be able to teach you about it. For now, stay strong. If he cares about you, your lack of action in this situation will make him question his actions, wonder if he did the right thing & begin to miss you. Once he begins to miss you & if he truly loves you, he will be in touch some time in the future. In meantime, try to turn your focus to goals, hobbies, passions...really anything that brings you joy. It will help distract your thoughts of him, create more value for yourself & build your confidence. This will make you even more attractive to him, or other men. It would be good to begin dating other men, as well. This doesn't mean hat you have get involved with any of them, but again it will help rebuild your confidence by proving to yourself that you have options.

[@THEMAN-ru8ek]

5 years ago since I've been use the no contact rule with my Ex😅 then 2 weeks ago i received a message from my Ex on my messenger but i didn't response😅 I don't want to take her back again in my life and I don't want to be a part of her life 😅im completely moving forward with my life 😅next time im going to seenzone or block her on my messenger if she'll message me on my messenger 😅.no contact rule is always effective use it to moving forward and to make your life Better.

[@SkillofAttraction]

They almost always come back...eventually. This is why, if you DO want them back, you never wait for them or you could be waiting for a long time, depriving yourself of other women. Move on...they will find you if they want you. I had an ex come back 15 years later!

[@EllenDScott]

There's no reason to try to stay in her life. Romantic gestures come off pathetic and repulse her. Genius.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, grand romantic gestures only works in the movies.

[@snezanakohlbacher9089]

dating after relationship break up?! NO GOOD IDEA

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's the best thing you can do....just keep moving forward. Sitting around drowning in depression & low self esteem is not a good idea.

[@mlggaming838]

I've caught my ex girlfriend staring at me a few times. In addition, when I would talk to my friends, she would try to be a part of the conversation. But generally, she stares at me a lot. I don't know if that is a good thing or bad?

[@SkillofAttraction]

I would say it's leaning towards a good thing. If she didn't want to have anything to do with you she wouldn't be looking in your direction at all.

[@wintertarzanjagrup2527]

I always use the No Contact rule .

[@YoungBlaze]

Coach corey jr lol

[@JihadBunnydick]

Lol!

[@annamiljevic8632]

Going out dating again so soon is a bad idea because people shouldn't jump from one relationship to another that fast. This guy gives a bunch of bs.

[@SkillofAttraction]

No one said anything about getting involved in a relationship. Nice try, though.

[@jennypatton645]

I am using to reflect on the things he said to me , no we have a soft contact like email . So I've contact him only 2 -3 now keeping it bussiness like over a audio that he wanted me to hear before the break up , actually I broke up with him and so I also contacted him first. I believe people know this for the most part . Believe its possible as well . But allow growth to happen too .

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's really what 'no contact' is for...for the 'dumpee' to reflect, grow, let go & heal. A nice possible byproduct of that is it also gives the 'dumper' space & time to miss their ex & get a sense of what life is like without them. And sometimes this can lead to a reconciliation.

[@AlexisFloresFilms]

Hi Coach I have this girlfriend, we are new into relationship like 3 weeks only. She’s sweet and expressive/touchy and she always initiates video call to see me. We are a bit long distance relationship like 40km away so I only see her once a week then suddenly out of the blue she pulls away. she did not respond to my messages anymore. I thought she was just busy because she has a thesis to defend on her masters degree, it looks like she failed that defense and I told her over fb chat that she is a strong individual and regardless on how she want to cope up with it, Im here for her. she just “seen” my message and not responding for 3 days in a row but she views my stories in IG. ill apply this no contact i hope it helps, i cant think of anything I did wrong for her :/

[@SkillofAttraction]

It's confusing when women do this, but they all do it to one degree or another. Most likely what happened is she's just feeling a little too familiar with you (no mystery right now) & a little too confident where she stands with you. In much rarer cases, there may be another dude in the picture (maybe an ex popped back into her life?) I recommend you assume it's my first suggestion & just back off, like you're planning, & let her come to you. When she does, don't question it, just get her back out on a date. here are a couple videos you may find helpful... kzbin.info/www/bejne/aH-caqppi9ppoLM kzbin.info/www/bejne/e16ZaIuthtZ4eKM

[@AlexisFloresFilms]

@@SkillofAttraction thank you coach for being active with your subscribers ill watch your video recommendations

[@emilywinter3375]

𝘈𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 6𝘺𝘳𝘴,𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘶𝘱 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯,𝘪 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 .𝘪 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘐 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘢 𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘺 𝘦𝘹 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘳. 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵,,𝘢𝘱𝘱 𝘩𝘪𝘮.

[@emilywinter3375]

➕1 =956=531=2406...,

[@ralphwiggum1982]

I did no contact for two weeks an got a notification from my instagram an saw my ex liked 10 of my post in a row is she trying to get my attention

[@SkillofAttraction]

Absolutely! However, you want direct contact from her before you respond. Direct contact = text or phone call

[@ralphwiggum1982]

Skill of Attraction ok oh one more question are my chances probably good if even after our break up we would still have somewhat of a sexual relationship even tho not recently cause I just decided to cut her off so I won’t get stuck in friends with benefits are my chances still good

[@SkillofAttraction]

I wouldn't have done that. You were in communication with your ex & you were getting laid by her...you were in a position that most guys going through a breakup wish they were in. You were basically in a relationship with her, just without the label. If you would have just been patient & focused on having fun with her the relationship would have fallen into place naturally. You do still have a good chance with her, but I recommend that you watch my latest video that talks about a very similar situation. kzbin.info/www/bejne/pKvYlWedmtaBjbs

[@kingjohnjuly]

How can I reach u

[@TheWritingGirl]

If you have to 'manipulate" someone to love you, its not love and just let it die already

[@SkillofAttraction]

While I agree with what you're saying, there is nothing manipulative about 'no contact' if that's what you're driving at.

[@elprimo6652]

WHEN WIL I FIND SOME ONE I CAN LOVE AND BE LOVED THE SAME WAY BACK AND HAPPY FOR EVER????????????

[@SkillofAttraction]

You have to work on self improvement. Women want a man who is the prize. The more you love yourself, the more women will love you. Watching some of my videos is a great start & will get you headed in the right direction.

[@jameshuffmar1765]

I thought saying Happy New Year would be the decent thing to do. She never replied but she DID NOT BLOCK MY NUMBER either so maybe that means something

[@SkillofAttraction]

If she pushed you away or broke-up with you, it's never a good idea to break 'no contact' & reach out. I recently did a video called "Dangers of breaking no contact" that explains this much more in depth.

[@Troy12-fitnessmodel]

So my story is I broke up with her due to dishonest behaviour, after a week of NC and finishing with her I reached out to reconcile. She has now since said she doesnt ever want to be back with me...possibly in the future. I did the usual beg/try to rebuild for a day or so. I have told how I felt and walked away for a week NC. She said there would be no one else and couldnt think of being with anyone else but me. Yet she posted last night on Facebook that shes single and ready to mingle... are we done here or is she moving on? Weve not spoke for a week even though she offered friendship. I have walked away.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Happy to help! Please see the pinned comment.

[@sheriwilson6340]

My bf and I dated for 4 years he is a sentive guy. He was never a player or nouthing like that. I was his first serious girlfriend. Then out of the blue he said he couldn't do it anymore and that the way I feel he didn't feel the same love as I did. Which really hurt buy I think cause he is so much younger than me and he has not dated alot so I think he wants to go exploring and find what else if out there so I was gotta give him some space and see what happens in The end is that a good idea?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, giving him space is the best thing you can do. It will also make you more attractive in his eyes, as opposed to chasing him & trying to convince him to change his mind. That never works. So, I recommend not to contact him anymore. When he misses you he will most likely reach out to you. It might take a while, so be patient & keep your focus on improving yourself & doing things that you bring you joy. This will build your confidence & keep your mind distracted from him a bit.

[@loulou1235]

It doesnt matter if he wasnt a bad guy. Truth is to him you are just an option. Look out for someone who adores you.

[@Nukemaster91]

Hi coach, do you still advocate indefinite no-contact after a breakup of an intense/high mutual attachment short term relationship (2-3 months). Cause of breakup was needing to focus on herself/couldn’t give me the time ‘I need or deserve’. Towards the end a drop in contact due to personal issues made me insecure and try to pull back rather than give space which I assume came across as needy and weak. I’m using the time to reflect, improve and keep busy however some coaches advise using an accountability letter/elephant in the room letter to re-establish some dialogue after no contact. Your thoughts?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, indefinite no contact. It doesn't sound like it ended badly, per se, but she left due to a loss of attraction. The reasons she told you were the typical excuses girls give when they're not feeling it any longer & they don't want to hurt your feelings. The good news is, if the attraction was that intense between you two, as long as you don't do weak/needy things after this split, there's a REALLY good chance she will be back. A woman's attraction is always in flux; one day it's high, the next day low. So, when you do something that turns her off & causes her to pull back, a lot of the times just giving her some space is all it takes for her attraction level to begin to rise again. The reason this happens is, because she not only sees your strength (by not chasing after her), but she begins to miss you & wants that feeling of high attraction back again. That feeling really is like a drug. And NEVER, ever do the letter thing. That's still chasing after someone who pushed you away. If a girl wants you & values you, she's not going to let you get away easily, nor permanently.

[@zerihunchekol3860]

Better to go no contact forever. If they don't want you in life, there is no need of playing games to make them back

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's basically what I say. Though, I do explain what to do when/if they do reach out IF one wants their ex back.

[@themadmattster9647]

I think its dumb to just ignore an ex trying to contact you. I think you should respond but just be succinct about it. ALMOST worked for me years ago, but I was a dumbass lol

[@SkillofAttraction]

I never said to ignore an ex. I said to stop initiating contact.

[@alaalfa8839]

Or maybe remind her the reasons you fell in love with her the first time some specific details... But it should sound genuine.. not found on the internet article.

[@BikkiMahato]

Hello, I need your help, I want to start the no contact rule but my ex texts me every morning(Good morning texts) and give some slow and cold replies throughout the day. What should I do? I am having exams for 15 days then I will be going out of town for 10 days. How should I implement the no contact rule and be safe and I want her back not lose. I am willing to do whatever you say. Can you please tell me. how should I act on the No Contact Rule. I mean what should I do. How should I do it to be safe and get her miss me. I used the Clean Slate Text and started no contact for 2 days, she has sent me 2 text saying goodnight and are u alright?Am I doing good ignoring her?What should I do? Please help me. I request you.

[@SkillofAttraction]

You don't want to ignore her if you want her back. You just want to stop initiating contact with her. So, don't contact her unless she contacts you first, then just respond to her with a positive attitude. However, when she does contact just take your time in responding to to her. As an example, if she contacts you with "good morning" respond to her in the afternoon or evening with the same thing, "Good evening =)". Don't try to start a conversation. If she tries to start a conversation, keep your conversations short, positive & playful. And try to get her to get together in person so avoid the "text friend" trap. I hope that clears things up for you! If you further assistance I can help you here: www.skillofattraction.com/dating-relationship-coaching/

[@northernthrifter8817]

Skill of Attraction if she dumped you I've read that you don't take her out on a date you get her to come to your place the thinking being ťhat she has to make the effort and you should only be willing to walk the distance from where you are to your front door. would you agree?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, that is the best way to handle it. You always want to put her in a position where she has to make the effort if she was the one who dumped you or pushed you away.

[@blessielove5727]

Skill of Attraction ,hi my boyfriend and I having a wonderful and full of great memories together,he focus all his time with me,he prioritize everything about me and my fmily,until such time that we are already in distance because we agreed that ill be going home for good and he will just support me in my business and with the kids,he has plan for our fure together and everything thats matter to both of us,,one tragedy happens and his feeling so down and miserable from the betrayal of his family,one problem to another and that cause him to be so cold suddenly and want to be alone and asking peace from me,dont want to accept calls,always angry to reply mesages,rejects my symphaty,though i tried to understand him but it breaks my heart that suddenly im a nobody and useless person to him,,,how I will manage this,pls advice,,,,

[@SkillofAttraction]

Unfortunately, as much as it hurts you, you must give him the space that he wants. If you continue to contact him it will only annoy him & make him more angry. It does not sound like he views you as a nobody or useless...only that he needs some space & time. When men are having a tough time, we need to be alone & figure things out by ourselves. We rarely talk about how we are feeling with others. So, I would just let him have his time by himself & allow him to come back to you at his own pace. In the meantime, I recommend that you just focus on yourself, your business & your children. I know it will be difficult, but it will help you keep your mind occupied & keep moving forward.

[@derrick1916-i7d]

NC since Mar 2nd. I have changed a TON since then and have accomplished a lot of things I have put on the back burner. Mutual friends are always checking on me, and Liverpool is going to the champions league final (definitely know I’ll cross her mind with her soccer fan brother). Always wonder how often then check your social media 🤔

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's great man! keep it up! Just be sure that you're doing it for yourself & not strictly for her. She can be a great motivator, but if you're doing it only for her it could backfire on you. And I'm not sure what you're asking about social media?

[@derrick1916-i7d]

Oh I meant by that was I wonder how often exes usually check your social media accounts. But yes 100% my own doing, working everyday to be the best version of myself

[@SkillofAttraction]

If an ex cares, I'm sure they're checking your social media more than you think...

[@thisrivenx366]

I broke up with my girl. Actually I just wanted to see her reaction because she was mad that i asked her if she could have taken some money from our workplace. ( I also told my boss that she didn’t steal it 100%, I did back her up, but she misunderstood it and got hurt ) asked her for a break, she said okay. So I just said ok let’s break up it makes no sense. She got many problems, we are both 18, she got thrown out of her house from her mom, she was absolutely in love with me, talked with my boss about marriage. ( we were only 4 months together ) I tried talking to her, but she says she has no feelings, but I do not believe her. What should I do? She was really crazy in love with me, more than I was with her, I just regret the breakup. Her reasons are that I acted weird the last 3 weeks and I didn’t give her attention that she wanted and that I did hear more on others than on her, what Did hurt her a lot aswell. Advices? I want her back, really badly

[@SkillofAttraction]

I would tell her that you apologize for overreacting, that you made a mistake & you would like to work things out. If she agrees, then you know what to do...if she does not agree, then just tell her to contact you if she changes her mind & walk away. If she truly loves you as much as she has expressed in the past, she will not let you go permanently. It just may take her a little time to figure things out before she contacts you again. But do not contact her if she does not agree unless she contact you first.

[@humbieduardoregulezpaco7552]

Hey coach, so I dated this girl, things had started going down hill and then she broke up with me when she went back to where she studies (long distance).. since then things had been horrible and I started make all mistakes in the world (needy accepting friendship after I said no etc).. I still showed high value when I pulled back for real (0 initiation).. she came back to our country but I wasn’t exactly in same city (trips) she would DM me every other day (photos vids audios etc of her) so we started talking again and things were pretty ok.. I asked her to meet up she told me her family wouldn’t let her due to COVID... she’d still reach out and I asked her a couple weeks later to have a video date she agreed but on the day told me she couldn’t and was busy studying(day before she saw me with some girls on stories).. again she reached out and a couple of days later I asked her again since she was busy that time and threw in a joke that she still had time to come see me.. she replied with daggers saying that just because she talked to me doesn’t mean she wants anything with me.. since she had been continually disrespectful after breakup(telling me didn’t get turned on by me; before we met up for the first time she told me she’s barely had sex and past flings were sexless so I didn’t believe her)(being rude and flakey etc) I told okay I wish you well then blocked her everywhere (at the time I just wanted to move on).. A couple of days later I unblocked and she texted me saying why I deleted and blocked her.. I explained I felt disrespected for a lot of things, she told me she didn’t do it etc.. I told her I couldn’t act like a friend because it’s not who I am(she gets mad when I flirted and said to meet-up).. told her again take care hope she finds someone special and Godspeed with uni, hope our paths cross again.. she didn’t reply.. she might be dating someone new (but it started when I blocked her).. is it ok to re add her and tell her I was acting dumb to at least leave the door open? Or is it completely bust?

[@SkillofAttraction]

I recommend that you do not add her again, because it will come across as weak & she will lose more respect for you. Yes, it's always best that you let her know the door is open if she has a change of heart, but if she truly wants you that will not matter; she will find a way to get in touch with you. How you feel about a girl does not affect how she feels about you.

[@humbieduardoregulezpaco7552]

@@SkillofAttraction thank you coach it makes sense.. I do think she had feelings for me but things went south.. I don’t understand why she wouldn’t want to meet up if she kept blowing up my phone(maybe she was testing me or felt I pushed things).. I won’t reach out unless a lot of time has passed and I’m visiting close friends in her city (nothing to lose).. but I did cock it up completely by blocking and deleting I do hope she sees some strength in me doing that as in I’m done and moving on

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@humbieduardoregulezpaco7552 Yes, that's confusing when women do that, but it's more about your attention. Women thrive on attention; it validates them, but they don't need to actually see you or spend time with you to feel that validation the same way that we do. So, if they can get that attention for free without having to do anything for it, they will. This is why you want to make sure that any woman in your life is investing in you & earning your attention before you give it too much of it away for free. After all, your time is your most valuable asset. Giving her a little for free is fine, but then make sure that she's putting in the effort before you give too much more or she will take full advantage. So, moving forward, just remember that. The trick is do enforce this with a smile on your face with a touch of indifference (ie: not attached to an outcome) in your attitude.

[@humbieduardoregulezpaco7552]

@@SkillofAttraction hard pill to swallow but sounds about right.. I know I did a good job when things were good, she'd make a lot of effort to see me and she suggested I go live with her in her city.. obviously, things change like the wind with women which is where I am now! I should have acted indifference like I used to I the beginning.. Thank you sir!!

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@humbieduardoregulezpaco7552 Yes, women are emotional creatures & act on the emotions they're feeling in that moment, & their emotions are always in flux. You being emotionally centered & indifferent to her fluctuating emotions is the key, but can be difficult at times. It's even more important that you behave indifferently to her walking away, because that really is the best chance that you will be hearing from her again. And when/if you do hear from her again, be upbeat & indifferent...then arrange a date (IF you want another shot with her).

[@debonaire_nerd]

Great vid! I met a girl earlier this year where we connected well but there were a lot of mixed messages. We spent about a month hanging out but I was insecure and a dick which resulted in her telling me that I hurt her feeling and didn't want contact. I never messaged her after that. About five months after that, we see each other in the supermarket. I stop to say hi and it's a really pleasant, but brief, exchange. I very respectfully end the conversation, telling her I am in a hurry but it was great to see her. A month later, she emails asking if she would like to be friends again. What's going on in her head? Once again, we ended badly BECAUSE OF ME. Not her.

[@SkillofAttraction]

This tells me that, at least at the time, she really liked you & she now misses you. If you haven't responded to her yet, don't agree to be friends, but do tell her that you would like to see her. Then simply ask her when she;'s free. if she agrees, just arrange a date & don't bring up the past at all (relationship, your mistakes, etc)...start fresh, like she's a brand new girl & a brand new courtship.

[@debonaire_nerd]

Actually, this is what I did. I did reply to her email, thanked her for reaching out and just simply said it would be great to catch up for a chat (i never addressed being friends nor said i'd like to be friends - just meet for a chat). She said she'd be free in two weeks as she was busy (at the time of writing). At the time, I was travelling out of my home town for three weeks, I told her this. I politely ended the conversation saying it was great to hear from her. This was a month ago. Honestly, I haven't written back since and nor has she. I know I was meant to set the date but I decided to spend that time thinking about what I really wanted. Also, I am spending ALL of this time focusing on myself: career, fitness and just life in general. If she reaches out again, i'll set a date and will present the best version of myself. If I never hear from her again, it's honestly fine because I will just keep improving. But, best of all, it means we actually ended on a significantly more positive note than in earlier this year. That honestly makes me happy because I hated how we ended. I resent that version of myself - i'm a different guy now.

[@SkillofAttraction]

You're doing a great job then...& everything that you can do. As far she goes, she'll more than likely contact you when she wants to see you. She's contacted you after this long, so I'm sure she will do it again. I;d just let it go for now & let her reach out to you, as she said she would when she wasn't busy any more.

[@debonaire_nerd]

Sounds like a plan. Until then, just rocking and rolling at work, gym with a whole lot of chilling and Netflix'ing :) Thanks, man! (though I should point out that she wasn't ever my girlfriend, but there was a lot of flirting between us, she would message a lot, tease me, compliment me on my dress sense. Again, a union of mixed messages with some tease thrown in). Will keep you in the loop.

[@debonaire_nerd]

@@SkillofAttraction Hey, got an update: i bumped into her again at the supermarket tonight. Since I last wrote to you, I HAVE NOT written to her at all since she last wrote to me. I saw her, i said hello and asked how she was. She seemed happy to see me, she asked how I was and what was happening. I then ended the conversation by saying it was great to see her again and hope she enjoyed her night. She reciprocated. I actually feel better that I never wrote because I didn't feel like i was chasing - i was just a confident guy approaching. I'm not going to write to her. I think tonight might motivate her to write again. The entire time i stayed in my core, kept it succinct, polite and to the point.

[@PeterPSea]

Hello, I need some advice, I made a BIG mistake by showing over anxious and too hyper, here was the story, after she ignored me and took a business trip to avoided me. I called her up and she admitted "we can’t be together because her parents think we don’t fit"....huh? I’ve haven’t' even meet them. We dated about 2 months. She was raised from a traditional family with extreme rules which turned her to have a low very self-esteem in relationship. She’s like a puppet to her parents. Ok, I said, respected your decision. But I screwed the NC rules and took my chance, emailed her daily, not to beg, but made up something like radio station, talks about humor, education, and interesting real stories. She did read and listens to them, more than once, (I have a tracking app that can see if the person opens the mail and how long they reads them ) Anyway, from the last email, I put the "last show" with all the heart melting materials and a touchable song, claim I will stopped the show for health reasons. She called me and cried like a baby that night, said wants to see me in the morning. I was really hyper and over anxious, even showed a little desperation while messaging each other before went to bed. GUESS WHAT? she messages me the next morning and said her boss asked her to do something very important and won't see me today.... what was I thinking ...I said its ok, take care, then sent out a few stupid desperation messages again, last 2 messages were from her, "I just want to check and worried about your health, I want give you a few more hugs too. I applied the NC for a few days now…from now on, I have to think cautiously straight. I have to show a lot of confidence do what I suppose to do, change myself, improve myself and let her see my change, I’ll email her again in a few weeks to let she hears my changed …As since as she doesn’t block me, I think I still have the chance… any suggestions?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Unfortunately, you're fighting an uphill battle when her family is against you. For women, it's very important what their friends & family think. In her heart, she doesn't care what they think but, it will really cause her to hold back from taking action. What you're doing is working for you, but you're right...you have to have self control with the anxiety & desperation that you're showing. Girls like emotionally strong & confident men. That's what will make you the most attractive overall. So, yes...focus on your own improvement for now. You will feel better & more confident. The next time to communicate with her, you do not have to show her that you've changed. In fact, you do not want to tell her that you've changed...she will see it in the way you talk, your personality & your behavior.

[@PeterPSea]

@@SkillofAttraction great advice sir, even though she didn't see me a few days ago, but she did mentioned that she wants to see a "Fit, stronger, a handsomer version of me" in the future, since I told her I was sick. Most people had advice me to give up, because of parent's disapproval. It is a definitely a tough tough uphill battle, but I'm willing to take any chances, Shes the "ONE" i'm looking for. Once again, thank you sir!

[@Positionzen]

I don't know man, exs reaching out after months of not spending time with them just seems uninteresting. Kinda get used to not hearing from them and enjoying life. Why bother asking them out after all that time passes and they just send some random message about nothing?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Of course you don't HAVE to take your ex back, but many people want them back & this is the best way to achieve that...at least for starters. You want your ex to EARN you back, but since you're the man you must take the lead. The chances of a woman asserting herself back into your life after she pushed you out is extremely slim. So, if that's something you want, she took the first step by reaching out, & if she wants you back as well, she's hoping you show her the way. However, just because she reaches out doesn't necessarily mean she wants you back, but it does show that she's potentiality open to it. It's often how you, the man, handles it that will determine if she comes back or not...then of course she must earn you back the rest of the way.

[@SkidCudi]

Watching from Nigeria thank you

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thank you for watching!

[@ether.UNLIMITED]

thanks for the info!

[@SkillofAttraction]

My pleasure...

[@dailyamperes]

What about if she took advantage of me my time, money, and hard work. She went back to her ex husband.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Protect yourself of course. If you need to speak to her to tie up loose ends, that's fine...just don't talk ab out the relationship or breakup, or anything that has to do with that unless she brings it up. Here are a couple videos that may help with your situation... No Contact when you share a life: kzbin.info/www/bejne/iaq2qYdmnL2npM0 She may reconcile with her ex husband: kzbin.info/www/bejne/n5WrdGlolNdsY5I

[@sharmamanoj]

Thanks buddy 👍

[@SkillofAttraction]

You're welcome!

[@nicolealizio2003]

I was with this man for 5 yrs after the break up we lived together for 6 months. Right now we've been separated for 7 months I haven't contacted him for 5 months. He blocked me from Facebook. He's already dating someone else. His friends told me it's rebound relationship because he's trying to forget about me. Any suggestions

[@SkillofAttraction]

If he broke up with you, chasing him only lowers your value in his eyes. He has to realize what he gave up, but the catch is that he has to realize this on his own. Reminding him, even indirectly, is still chasing. On the other hand, it sounds like you have mutual friends, which is good, because word will eventually get back to him. Your best bet is to begin some radical self improvement, whatever that may be for you. However you must do it for you, not him, or you won't have the same drive to accomplish what you feel you need to change in your life, for the better. Focus on the things that will make you happy, because it will help rebuild your confidence, keep your mind off of him and your own sense of accomplishment will radiate from you making you that much more attractive.

[@judorican973]

Time to move on ppl!

[@rdsieben]

If they reach out to you... Try for a meet up. "Hey! It's nice to hear from you! I would love to see you again! when are you available to get together?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Exactly!

[@northernthrifter8817]

you've read how to be a 3% man

[@SkillofAttraction]

Great book! I highly recommend it!

[@pam9657]

WHAT SHOULD I DO?? (lol) last summer my best (male) friend was murdered and this guy (who i was extremely facebook connected to since October 2015 because we share the same beliefs) would speak to me over the phone and text me nearly every single day (since August or Sept 2017) and would just listen to me cry and reminsce, etc. I could tell that he wasn't trying to take advantage of me during my vulnerable moments, but he sincerly cared about my heartbreak and was hoping to see me heal. We always flirted, but I dont know if either of us was serious about each other. In November I believe feelings and interest picked up for one another. We saw each other in person for the first time in December 2017 and we were both still very mentally and pyhsically attracted to one another... we are in different states, but only about 90 minutes away. we talk and text daily and he has shown me in various ways he cares, yet we have not seen each other again since and it's the end of Feb 2018. Sighhhh... I have expressed how important it is to me to see each other, but he says that we promised each other to help each other heal from our passed relationships.... he also said that his last 2 relationships were based on sex and he doesnt want to rush things. He wants to make sure that if we are in a future relationship it is built on real foundation. he says he wants to go slow but he defintely wants us to have something special together.. He expresses his interest in me, attraction in various ways for me, and states that he wants something really special with me... yet he hasn't asked for a commitment.... he has taken his time on seeing me... he hasn't said he loves me... i feel he does, but he hasn't said it so maybe i'm wrong.... we have a great friendship and i believe that he is being honest with me and he does want to establish something real... but i want to be able to be face to face with him in the flesh to hold him, look in his eyes etc... he went from making $60,000 to having to resign from his union position because of the conditions he had to work in so right now.. his car has issues.. I know that he is not financially right and maybe it plays a role in him coming to see me... or maybe I'm just making excuses for him.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Well, the harsh reality is that if he really wanted to see you he would make an effort. You must be very careful not to fall into the "chat buddy" trap, which it sounds like you may have done just that. It takes little to no effort to maintain a relationship over the phone/computer, so it's very easy to fall into this. Especially with verbal promises being made, seemingly of false hope. It sounds like he genuinely cares about you, however. After all, he IS investing his time with you. I recommend that you tell him once again that it's important that you see him in person on a somewhat regular basis & that, as much as you like him, you don't feel that you can keep investing your time into a phone-only relationship. Then slowly pull away until he makes some sort of effort to see you. Remember...your time is the most valuable thing that you can give someone. You don't want to waste it on someone who is putting in so little effort.

[@pam9657]

Thanks for your advice! I feel you are correct because I fell prey for that type of relationship before and I do not want to do it again. That was a complete waste od my time. I do believe this guy is being honest with me because of the friendship we built. I do know it was very hard for him to get over his ex, but he did realize that relationship was toxic and no longer wants any part of it. He did mention that he wants something valuable with me but doesnt want to rush like he did with his exes and have it be more of a sexual thing but one of substance. He also stated that he thought he and I agreed to help each other heal from our past relationships and take it slow. The only thing is he hasn't been with her intimately in a year... I dont know how much longer he needs to heal. As far as I am concerned it can be another year and at the end what if he is still not ready for commitment. I feel he is genuine and honest with me. I just dont know if something like this is worth the wait. The pro is that we get along amazing. I ignored his GM text and was considering doing the no contact. Do you feel no contact is appropiate for this? I dont believe he is intentionally trying to hurt me so dont know if it is appropiate. I value your time and wont keep going with this after this question. Thanks for your feedback. I apprciate you!

[@SkillofAttraction]

I think no contact is a bit extreme in this case. I think what I suggested is your best course of action. It indirectly puts a little pressure on him to step up, or move on. If he doesn't get the hint then he's definitely not worth your time. The best way to get some else's attention is to remove yours.

[@pam9657]

I agree completely. Thank you so much for your thoughts and advice.

[@Samir-kz8gb]

Man I need your help please! My ex and I share same friend group! She is trying to make me jealous with my own friends she is flirting with them right infront of me! I spoke with her a day ago but didn't talk about the relationship.. i try to stay indifferent and show like idc but its getting the best of me! Need help please...

[@SkillofAttraction]

She's doing this because it's getting a reaction out of you, & it's getting her your attention. Women LOVE attention, even if it's negative attention. You must show her that you're not bothered by it & she will most likely stop. It will be difficult to pretend like you don't care, but you must power through it. You can't force her to stop, so this is really the only thing you can do. Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.

[@inspiretamil3800]

I got break up on August 23 2018 . I begged and pleaded then walked away . I followed no contact . After a week she called me . I attend her call and talked. But she talked without an interest so I cut her call and followed no contact . On September 14, she came my home and saw me . I talked her face to face but no use . On some gaps she called and messaged me . But I did not reply. Before few days she told we will marry . Go to job soon . After 2 years meet my parents and ask them permission. Then we marry . On October 7 2018 . She called me and told. We marry with our parents permission . If they not accept I won't marry. I thought she confused herself . So I told we will marry after 2 years . Till that we won't call and message each other. She said ok . On the next day Oct 8 . She called me 6 times on evening . I did not attend her call . Now I am in no contact from October 8 2018 . What do I want to do ? Plz give me a suggestion . My birthday is coming on October 26 2018 . What do I do?

[@SkillofAttraction]

I'm not sure why you don't want to communicate with each other for 2 years, especially when you're talking about marriage?? I explain it in this video, but when she initiates contact with you (if you want her back), simply tell her that you would like to see her & ask her when she is free to get together. If she agrees to meeting you, arrange a date. I don't teach to ignore, unless you do not want her in your life anymore. Next time she contacts you, try what I suggested.

[@inspiretamil3800]

@@SkillofAttraction ok . Shall i message her? or wait for her call or message ?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Wait to hear from her. If she loves you she will not let you get away permanently.

[@inspiretamil3800]

@@SkillofAttraction now we talking each other but not like before. Few calls and few messages. When she thinks to talk with me then only we can talk . If I message she sent some replies for my messages and finally say don't msg . What do I want to do ?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Then she should be doing 100% of initiating any contact. Do not initiate contact with her, let her come to you. When she does reach out to you, follow what I suggested above. You just have to be patient for now, so find an activity (preferable a productive activity; like, pursuing goals & hobbies) to keep your mind distracted & to keep you moving forward. Women LOVE a man on a mission.

[@santabarbaraguy9430]

does this still apply to a woman I dated for a couple months ? we weren't in a relationship just dated. she ended things with me because she said she is really busy but it's really because I came off as needy

[@SkillofAttraction]

You are correct, that was just an excuse...especially if you know you were acting needy. But yes, it still does apply as this communicates value. It doesn't guarantee that she will come back, but it's your best chance.

[@santabarbaraguy9430]

@@SkillofAttraction when she broke things off with me in person she said maybe something will work out between us in the future. it's been about 7 weeks now so idk. anyways thank you for response I will tell my friends about your channel

[@SkillofAttraction]

You never know what will happen in the future. So it's best to let go, stay in 'no contact' & focus on bettering yourself. If she misses you & values you, she will be back at some point. And thanks for spreading the word!

[@karinamontes1539]

AJ Triumph in needy too

[@sammonsterenergy1982]

What gets me is your with someone have fun, great sex, make each other smile and they always enjoy being around you..then they say she’s got an awful lot of pressure from work/family/me says I’m not feeling the connection with you, not sure on future or if I feel what I should with us so best thing right now is to end things. I’ve really enjoyed out time. So you give them space and say get back to me when you’ve figured things out. I blame Covid lol!!

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, basically. Give her all the space she wants. Cease all initiating, like you've completely disappeared. let her come to you when she's ready.

[@emilywinter3375]

𝘈𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 6𝘺𝘳𝘴,𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘶𝘱 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯,𝘪 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 .𝘪 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘐 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘢 𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘺 𝘦𝘹 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘳. 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵,,𝘢𝘱𝘱 𝘩𝘪𝘮.

[@emilywinter3375]

➕1 =956=531=2406,

[@TAGvirtualsolutions]

This makes no sense if she dumped the guy because he hurt her and he needs to make changes... he needs to chase

[@SkillofAttraction]

I do say that he should tell her that he wants to work things out. If she doesn't want to, there's not a lot more that can be done in that moment. A relationship takes two. She should not play games to try & get him to chase her. She should communicate why she's hurt instead of going for the nuclear option & ending things without saying why she's hurt.

[@razor2ts]

Best advice on here! Thank you man :-)

[@jennypatton645]

You also have restricted this to men this should be to people not either or .

[@SkillofAttraction]

I'm a men's coach, so it's aimed towards men, but most of what I teach is the same for women. There are some subtle differences, but for the most part it's very similar. I even coach some women.

[@vannhelsin2434]

Best advice ever

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thank you!

[@ginzo666]

If you send that letter, the woman is not only going to laugh at it. She's going to show her friends so they can laugh at it too. I've had women I'm dating show me weird messages from their exes and we had a laugh about it.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yup. Probably. The only time a romantic letter, or letter gushing feelings, will have a positive effect on a woman is when her attraction is high & you've been a challenge.

[@ginzo666]

@@SkillofAttraction I think even George Clooney would eventually kill attraction if he did that too much. It's just not what women respond to, especially if they've pulled away.

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@ginzo666 Yes, exactly. Very good looking, successful men can get away with a little more "simp" behavior, but eventually it will turn her off.

[@ginzo666]

​@@SkillofAttraction When I was younger, I was decent looking enough that women asked me out fairly regularly. Or they at least handled the approach. This would get me a few dates/fucks at most. I had to learn a bit of game before could get a LTR.

[@ayyubilyasov]

thank you . it helped me

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's great! Thanks for watching!

[@Rawnrecords]

My ex lost her feelings for me. She said that she was unsure if that was the case (2 months ago) and kinda gave it a chance. We agreed to break up this Saturday. This month has been a nightmare. She started out saying that she wasn’t happy and told me that she had a lot of things in her head. She was just constantly irritated. We talked about how she kinda felt a pressure regarding visiting me in the weekends and talking on phone. How she sometimes missed counteraction (a man). I guess I’ve been too sweet to her. We talked about this in the start of October (7th) and we planned meeting again later on (18th). On the 18th she blew me off by saying she was sick (she later explained that this might have been due to her being afraid and nervous to say the truth about her feelings). This day we wrote together and she blamed me for not doing anything about the situation.. like I didn’t care about we having a problem which I did. I just thought she needed space since she said that she had a lot of things going on. Furthermore, I asked what she expected of me, what should I do, and she answered.. “I don’t know, be a bit interested maybe”.. but yeah, we planned our next meeting 28th October and she said that she had taken a ‘shift’ that day so it would be 27th instead.. fine.. and then when we met I said that I hadn’t gotten any confirmation regarding her ‘loving me’ this whole month (she had been cold towards me this whole month). She said that she wasn’t in love anymore but she still loves me. After this we talked about how awful this month had been and she apologized for her being cold and everything. We agreed that it was best to break up (she asked don’t you think).. and yeah, because one more month of her being cold and everything I couldn’t take it and when she says that her feelings are gone; that’s not something we can fix.. I just have to accept it. We agreed that we still could look each other in the eyes and everything afterwards.. and yeah.. I haven’t written/talked to her since our breakup (5 days ago). I don’t know what I should do; I really want her back. (We saw each other for 2 hours this month in total). She has a lot of work and is stressed (she said that previously). We had been together for 7 months. Do I have a chance?

[@SkillofAttraction]

There's always a chance. It sounds like she's pushing you away, but then blaming you for not trying harder. Don't fall for that...it's a trap. The best thing you can do is tell her that you'd like to work things out, but if she's not interested then tell her to contact you if she has a change of heart...then walk away & move on. She'll be back if truly loves/values you.

[@Rawnrecords]

Skill of Attraction Yeah, she pushed me away due to her feelings; she told me that. Her feelings are pretty my gone => we can’t really work things out I guess (can’t fix her feelings for me, that’s something I need to accept I guess) => should I tell her that she should reach out if her heart changes? Or what would be a good idea to do? And then just no contact / improve myself? I think she lost interest due to me being an emotional / insecure dude => lost respect somehow... also she still has pictures of me and her + highlights on instagram with me and hearts. Idk how I should interpret this. I just found out that she’s already on tinder again with her Instagram attached where she has this picture of me and her + those highlights..

[@SkillofAttraction]

Well, emotions change like the wind. What she was feeling a the time of the breakup may change after a little time & space away from you. I believe I explained it in this video, but let her reach out to you & she will sometime in the future if she misses you & values you. Then assume she wants to see you, tell her you'd like to see her & ask her when she's free to get together. If she rejects you, tell her to contact if she changes her mind. Then go no contact again. I have several videos on no contact & breakups...

[@Rawnrecords]

@@SkillofAttraction Alright, thank you! - I just hurts when I find her on Tinder a few days after our breakup. Furthermore, she has her Instagram connected to Tinder which includes a picture of me and her standing together (couple-ish)... Can't really understand why she would have that picture + have those story-highlights (with me and hearts) on her Tinder. If you are dating/searching for other guys.. why would you show those things.

[@Rawnrecords]

@@SkillofAttraction Also, I just read your article 'Being too Available to her Ruins Attraction' which describes it very very well... I didn't have things besides studying and her. I don't/didn't really hangout with friends/go partying due to my focus on uni (i'm too boring/predictable) => I don't have a fullfilling life which is true.

[@RohaanCchauhan555]

Brother its been three months now, no contact from both of us, it was she who called off our engagement, sometimes i think i want to be with her sometimes I don't, confused, over thinking everything, all thoughts some are logical some are illogical, bathing under the shower of emotions again and again. But i she wants to make it she has to initiate contact, i too want to make it but nope i won't show any signal to contact me and I won't initiate any, phase is tough and killing me everyday but I'll make it all alone, it has to pass and it will pass, I'll make it large..

[@SkillofAttraction]

I know it's tough, man! I've been through it many times. It's best to just keep moving forward, keep bettering yourself, date other women & remind yourself that it's her loss! Remind her through your own self improvement & by not contacting her that you're the prize & if she doesn't do something about it she will lose you forever...

[@RohaanCchauhan555]

Skill of Attraction thanks mate 😎

[@juanmora9332]

Rohan Chauhan 3 month bro let go take L like a man go date other woman

[@RohaanCchauhan555]

Juan Mora no question buddy! But still it feels like i am missing something big .

[@RohaanCchauhan555]

school jobs who cares now, i am on my way to my beautiful life.

[@jameswhitlock7497]

Ex keeps contacting me every 2 weeks or 1 week checking how I am 🤔

[@SkillofAttraction]

I have a video called "Why does my ex still contact me?" that may shed some light on this. But next time she contacts you. tell her you want to see her & ask her when she's free. Focus on fun & flirting, & be a little playfully cocky. If she rejects your date, don't take it personal. Tell her 'no problem. Maybe some other time', then politely end the conversation saying you'll talk to her soon. Then let her initiate contact with you again. Then do the same thing all over again when she reaches out. However, if she rejects you this time, you're not going to arrange a date again. It's up to her after she rejected two dates in a row. Just tell her to get in touch when she's interested in getting together. You may also want to watch this video: kzbin.info/www/bejne/fZm4Xn6dobl3aMU

[@malhunt7]

These videos are not for anyone looking to settle down. The hundreds of no contact videos posted by scorned lovers and ppl with a "dating life" not a married one. I know if I want to get married I'm going to take the word of a serial dater with a grain. I fell down a YT rabbit hole....I gotta get out.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Well, you have to date before you get married. Suit yourself...

[@user-om1jd6th9f]

For approximately 3 months I continuously begged her, and she started becoming more bitchy and more disrespectful, and now she used to say I don't have feelings for u. After watching your video i started no contact, during this first 3,4 day se contacted me but i did not respond and now she is not connecting. What should I do

[@SkillofAttraction]

Please see the pinned comment.

[@isoooalrock]

great video and truly effective my friend... i have question for you... i have been in no contact more a month by now and i feel my ex is trying hard to get me notice her...for instance she never uses Instagram (like once in a month) but after i stopped texting her thro insta she has been posting like every minute. although i ignore her but she studies with me in the same college (not same class) but i see her suddenly in canteen, or walking to class... so should o ignore her even in college? Like should i change my path when i see her? If i see her in canteen should i leave and come after she goes Hope u help with ur experience. Bcoz this girl is gonna be my wife and i really don’t wanna loose her

[@SkillofAttraction]

I can't say with 100% certainty, but it definitely seems like she's trying to get your attention on Instagram. Do not 'like' or comment on her photos...you want direct communication from her. Social media activity does not count as her reaching out. Seeing her suddenly in canteen & walking class tells me that she's trying to put herself in your orbit. Basically, she wants you to notice her & chase her. However, your resistance will eventually drive her crazy & force HER to make contact with you. I do not recommend ignoring her or changing anything about your daily routine to avoid her. You want to show her that you are unaffected by her presence. This communicates your emotional strength & women find that attractive. So, if she looks your way just smile & go about your day. If she truly cares & loves you, she won't let you go.

[@isoooalrock]

Thank you very much for help.appreciate it man

[@diamond13130]

It’s been 3 months that I’ve been trying to heal. It hasn’t gotten any better. I don’t even want to live anymore this rejection has killed me. I’ve tried everything to get over him, everything. Hobbies, prayer, meditation, working out, going back to school. What more can I do??? The pain hasn’t dissipated.. what am I doing wrong?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Believe me, I know exactly how difficult it is, & you're doing all the right things to help you move on. Focus on goals can also help, as it'll give you a sense of purpose, accomplishment & rebuild your confidence. Also, dating new men. I know that's probably the last thing that you want to do but, it's a good idea to force yourself. You don't have to get into relationship with any of these men...just enjoy some time with the opposite sex. And again, it will help rebuild your confidence. Another good idea is to do a search on KZbin here for "Abraham Hicks Relationships"...she teaches the law of attraction. Most people that I recommend her teachings to, who are also going through a tough breakup, have found themselves feeling much better.

[@diamond13130]

Skill of Attraction He contacted me today and sounds like he misses me and wants to come back. I’m keeping it cool at the moment but it may be possible that I might be having a Merry Christmas!

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's awesome! Make sure that you have him work for it a bit.

[@nickblacksoul4318]

Well said ,

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks!

[@karinamontes1539]

Ladies don't deal with a man who has multiple babymamas they players and they will NOt change they will hurt you and make you cry " just keep they for fun nothing serious trust me

[@MsSexyAngel29]

My situation is a little different. I broke up with him becos he couldn't get over his ex although there's a slim chance of them getting back tog as she's married. I've been on NC with him for over a week and he hasn't contacted me either. I want him back but not unless he's willing to let go of his past (he's resentful towards his ex becos she lied to him). It's apparent he likes me very much (even friends could tell) but I still have this fear that he might get over me during NC period even before he gets over his ex! Will NC work in my situation? We have a regular hangout spot so there's a chance I might bump into him but I don't know how I should act if I see him.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, you're doing the right thing. He won't forget you, but he needs to figure out what he really wants. If he decides to continue pining over a married woman where he has little chance, instead of pursuing something with you, then it would have never worked anyway. So, by you projecting your value by walking away & giving him the space to figure things out he will either continue down the same path he was on & miss out on something with you, or he will choose you. You want him to choose you 100% & not with one foot in & one foot out. It's difficult, but your only other option would be to continue being his second choice. Let him come to you on his own & a his own pace.

[@mariebell3094]

My ex tells me he luv me wants to be with me but he is with another woman so I told him to never contact me again I still love him hope I wasn't too mean can u help? I haven't contacted him for 2months

[@SkillofAttraction]

If he truly loves you he will figure something out in order to leave the other woman & be with you. You weren't too mean, because if you were stay in contact with him or continue to see him, you're actually lowering your own value in his eyes. Basically, he would be able to have his cake & eat it too...& he will never make a real decision. So, you're doing the right thing. I know how much it hurts being on the receiving end of this painful love triangle. I have actually been in your shoes & I walked away even though I loved her with all my heart. It hurts, but you must respect yourself first.

[@mariebell3094]

Skill of Attraction so true😁😁😁broke down spoke to him and he is still playing games...stupid of me ...back to square one thanks for u r reply I wish I had read it before I contacted him😁

[@esterwillis6420]

THERE IS NO REASON TO CAUSE SOMEONE ELSE PAIN.....ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU ARE GETTING OVER YOUR OWN PAIN...SELF PRESERVATION IS IMPORTANT....I DON'T FEEL THAT MANIPULATING SOMEONE IS A GOOD IDEA.... IF ITS BEST TO MOVE ON THEN THAT SHOULD BE RESPECTED....NOT TO SAY YOU DON'T STILL LOVE THEM BUT TO FEEL THAT YOUR LOVE WOULDN'T BE GIVEN IN RETURN IS SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT.....BUT ITS ALWAYS BEST TO THINK ABOUT WHATS BEST IS FOR EACH OTHER'S HAPPINESS AND IF BEING APART IS BEST THEN THAT'S WHAT SHOULD BE DONE.....

[@SkillofAttraction]

Did you watch the full video? This isn't manipulation. It's walking away when someone has made it clear that they don't want to be a part of your life any longer.

[@vaishaligawane7208]

How to apply this rule if you are facing her every day because she is your college or office.

[@SkillofAttraction]

I did a video about this: kzbin.info/www/bejne/qIvVfq2jqtichcU

[@damneisharma6489]

How can i apply no contact rule? We live together

[@SkillofAttraction]

I do explain that in this video, but the best way is to keep conversation to a minimal & go on about your day/night for yourself. Go out & do things for yourself (friends, hobbies, etc.). Do not initiate any conversation about the relationship or your personal life. If your mate brings it up, respond but keep it short. The only conversation you should initiate is important things (bills, living arrangements, kids, etc.)

[@calvnational8276]

Im the one who did the broke up with my ex... Because she didnt put the effort anymore... I told her that something need to change because i feel unhappy in this curent situation... But she refused to try... So i said we better part ways. Does the no contact still apply in my kind of situation? I did unfollow all her social media.. so i can move on more easy.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes. In this case, her actions (or lack thereof) caused the breakup. So, in terms of no contact, she may have well been the one to breakup with you, since she stopped investing into you & the relationship. You did the right thing here. In fact I have video about when women stop putting in the effort & I recommend to walk away if she stops investing. So, you want her to reach out to you before you take any action. It must be her idea. If you cave-in & begin reaching out to her again you will never get what you want. She will see it as weakness & lose any remaining attraction for you. So, stay strong, man! If she truly loves you she will be back. If not, then she just saved you a ton of time, energy & aggravation. It may hurt now, but in the long run it's a win-win for you.

[@emilywinter3375]

➕1 =956=531=2406,.

[@emilywinter3375]

➕1 =956=531=2406.,

[@calvnational8276]

@@SkillofAttraction hi sir, thanks for your advice.. 7 months have passed ... I want to share that with the break up I made myself open up to others more, I still haven't break no contact with my ex... But I started talking with her bestfriend, nothing serious yet, more like casual things going on... What I want to ask is... What kind of reaction expected coming from my ex by doing this ? I forgot to mention that me and my ex were in long distance relationship.. due to coronavirus we can not really visit each other for almost a half a year before... So does ldr really almost impossible to last?

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@calvnational8276 LDRs are very difficult to maintain. I have found the only way LDRs work is when both people make an effort to see each other &/or they have been making plans to be together one day. Without any physical intimacy it's almost impossible to keep an LDR together ling term. I'm glad to hear that you are talking to/dating other women. This is important, because you do not want to wait for your ex to reach out...they may never reach out, & you cannot put your life on hold for a maybe. If your ex cares enough about you, I'm sure that this will cause quite the reaction in her. There's a good chance that you will be hearing from her in that case, but she will be upset.

[@naveensehdev9973]

Just found out my ex is now seeing someone and I wished her the best told her to text me if it doesn’t workout with the new guy and she replied lol!;) ok! Not sure what it means. Any help on her response would be helpful.

[@SkillofAttraction]

She really didn't say enough to be able to interpret it. I'd just take it as her acknowledging you & now it's time to begin to move on. Either she'll contact you if the relationship works out or she won't. There's no way to know for sure, but you can't put your life on hold either.

[@arzueren3164]

Can I apply this to someone I’ve never dated. We talked for a month (flirt)

[@SkillofAttraction]

Of course, but it's best to communicate your intentions first.

[@corde1517]

What if were a little needy post breakup because this was my first love and I didn’t know about no contact or anything cause they don’t teach you this in school lol. But now she’s dating someone new and I now have been improving myself, growing, and just completed 3 months of no contact. No holiday or birthday reach out like I did the previous year are we done for good?

[@SkillofAttraction]

I can't say for sure if you two are done for good or not. However, it sounds like you are doing everything you can do & the best way you can do it, because you can't force things with her. You're dealing with emotions & not logic...& emotions are very unpredictable. What she feels today can change tomorrow. She has to feel the urge to reach out to you before anything can happen though. Oddly enough, they always seem to come back as soon as you've finally moved on. I recommend that you keep doing what you're doing...& start dating some new women. Having some new ladies in your life will help build up your confidence, keep your mind off of her & show you that you have options. Having options is very powerful. Also, you being a little needy post breakup is not a huge deal. She probably doesn't even remember it unless you made a big production out of it. And for the record, in my own experiences, I've had exes come back several months later on a few occasions...one girl came back years later. So, anything is possible. Keep up the good work!

[@corde1517]

Skill of Attraction thank you will continue to stay strong! I get the feeling that this is a rebound because their already saying they love each other after 3 months we were together for a year and a half and the good outweighed the bad we began going to different colleges so long distance played a part in the breakup

[@SkillofAttraction]

It's quite possible it's just a rebound or perhaps she was just lonely. Most relationships, especially young love, don't last more than 3-6 months...once the honeymoon period is over. By you gaining this sort of information & working on your own self improvement, you're already WAY ahead of most guys. Have the attitude that you're the prize & if she can't see that then it's her loss.

[@paradiseisland3352]

For me no contact is on by default, you break up with me ok kool deuces, even if it hurts am nobody’s mat

[@SkillofAttraction]

Exactly the attitude you should have! If they want you out of their life, give that to them.

[@rdsieben]

Regarding your girlfriend or wife did you apply no contact to get her back? If so, can you have her do a vid on how she felt when no contact was being applied to her?

[@SkillofAttraction]

I've always applied no contact, however I didn't know there as a name for it until a couple years ago. My thoughts were always "if I beg or chase her, she'll never respect me". I doubt she would do a video, but I'll ask her. That's actually a good idea to get a woman's first hand account, being on the other side. She watches all my videos & agrees with 99% of my advice, however.

[@carj3023]

Im curious what if you are dating a female who tells you you the only person she is talking to i dont think i should talk to other females also its only fair whats your opinion

[@SkillofAttraction]

I would ask her what she means, "Are you saying that you want us to be exclusive?" Because, it sounds like this is what she's getting at...trying to lock you down. If she says yes, then you can decide if you want to be a part of that or not. Always remember that men are the gatekeepers to commitment, the same way women are the gatekeepers to sex. If she says no, then just tell her that you prefer to keep your options open while you see where this goes between you two. However, just keep in mind that she'll be keeping her options open too. But, if she sees you as her best option, then you have nothing to worry about. Plus, you not trying not lock her down & resisting her attempt at controlling this will actually make you more mysterious, challenging...& ultimately more attractive.

[@carj3023]

@@SkillofAttraction thank you for your time and advice its much appreciated

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@carj3023 You always want to remember that you want women to bring up the idea of commitment or a relationship...this is the woman's job. As the man, all you have to do is focus on getting her out on dates, having fun together, & gently leading her into the bedroom. When a woman is ready she will bring up exclusivity, BUT she will most likely hint at it, rather than overtly mention it. Women are typically not direct about these things (or most things). So, they will say things like, "are you still seeing other girls?" or "What are we?" or "where is this going?" etc. This is why I feel exclusivity is what she's hinting for.

[@alenagoddess2400]

This should have been labeled for men it seems to be geared towards

[@SkillofAttraction]

All my videos are aimed towards men, but a lot of it would be the same for women. In the case of this video, you'd handle no contact virtually the same way, except that instead of trying to arrange a date when/if he reaches out to you, give him minimal time/attention until he asks YOU on a date or meetup of some sort.

[@princewins88bw]

What if you're the one who did the breaking up because you appear too needy? Does no contact still apply? I let her go.

[@SkillofAttraction]

If YOU broke-up with her because of your own mistake, then it is really up to you to initiate again. Just be sure that you're in a mindset of not being attached to any outcomes when you do reach out.

[@jzrc7908]

just breakup because she wants to go back to her ex that left her six month ago,she choosed him and i let him go,how can i handle these emotions? i miss her everynight,the worst is at the moment i have final exams

[@SkillofAttraction]

It's tricky, but you have to let go of your attachment to the outcome. In other words, you have to get your mindset to a point where you're fine with her coming back or not. Look for the positives in the situation, know that you are her better option & that it's only a matter of time before she realizes this & comes back (if you even want her back). It'll also be immensely helpful for you to turn your attention to your goals/hobbies, purpose./mission in life, health/fitness, being social/growing your social circle & dating other women. Not only will all that help keep your mind distracted from her & negative thoughts but they'll also help build your confidence.

[@Quraishy]

Well, with us, she wanted to marry me but I initially declined and resisted her when she wanted me lots, Later she did marry a guy, but not living with him yet, now I want her back, she asked me to be friends .. but one month down after her marriage contract, while I would talk to her almost everyday, yesterday I started no contact, and now she’s calling and messaging me again and again.. what should I do now? Will it work in such a situation or ... or is it rude that I just stop communicating with her... What shall I do if I want her back. She’s still quiet emotionally attached with me, and her husband lives in another country as of now, and i’m also living not in the same as her,, We never had a fight of any sort and were always in good terms, till now when I started no contact,, will it unfold the same way? Or will it have negative impact? Please to advice .. She's also messaging me like "I will never disturb you again ever" -- wanting to talk to me She's saying that she won't eat anything till I talk.. :$ What do I do, talk or.. P.s. I declined being a relationship with her at first as I was not that interested in her..

[@SkillofAttraction]

Well, she's now married, & trust me when I say that you do NOT want to get in between that, whether she truly loves him or not. I was in a similar situation when I was in my mid-20's & I had to let the girl go, despite that I was still in love with her. She came back to me appx 15+ years later when her marriage was disintegrating. So, I recommend that you tell her that love her (or that you adore her, care for her, or whatever it is you feel), but she's married & you cannot simply be 'just friends' with a woman in which you have these romantic/sexual feelings for. Then tell her that she should contact you if things do not work out with her marriage. Then walk away & begin dating new women. There's really not a lot that you can do in this situation.

[@betagimp127]

Ok so after 7 months a girl I could have had but did not just dropped a short email. Saying she was thinking about me and ending it with "lots of love. We met in the far east. Both go there often. I suspect she may be here and fishing to see if I am. How long should I wait to respond ?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Give it a couple of days. You haven't heard from her in 7 months, so there shouldn't be any rush on your part.

[@timothymurray1236]

Do you really believe that if you treated them well they will reach out?

[@SkillofAttraction]

It all depends on where she's at emotionally & how much attraction she's still experiencing for you. Generally, roughly 90% of exes eventually reach out as long as you didn't burn any bridges during the breakup, or you didn't completely chase her away with begging & pleading. The fact that you didn't treat her bad will most likely make her feel safer about reaching out, if she so chooses. No contact is still your best strategy regardless. It's really for you, so you can heal & begin moving on...as a nice byproduct, sometimes it gives your ex enough space to sort through her own emotions & come to terms that she misses you & doesn't want to be without you. Also, for future reference, please see the pinned comment.

[@andrebaxter4023]

Karate as a hobby! Okinawan Karate.

[@zandramiranda6542]

Hi..! I change my phone number...4 years in prison (him) he as access to me...not now! Did I make the right choice?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Well, if you're trying to get away from him for good, then yes. By changing your number I'd assume that you sent him a clear message..."don't contact me anymore".

[@zandramiranda6542]

I didn't tell him nothing...I just change my number...I was with him for four years, supplying money for him and money on his phone...he is a Narcissist...

[@SkillofAttraction]

I meant by changing your number you sent him a clear message. However, if you're feeling used by him, then you absolutely did the right thing. It can be very difficult, but your self respect matters more than anyone else or their feelings. And "no contact" is all about communicating your strength & self respect.

[@monp.4903]

He's been in prison. Yes, you made the right choice!

[@footlooseprince5341]

I courted a girl but in my simple light joke, she became offended to me and she said to me that don't call or chat her and she said she is busy. Should I stop pursuing her? And is it applicable in courtship?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, stop pursuing. If it was just a light-hearted joke, then either she has no sense of humor, or she's testing you as a way to see if she can take the power. Keep your power. Tell her to get in touch if she has a change of heat.

[@footlooseprince5341]

@@SkillofAttraction I really appreciate your response. Thank you so much for that.

[@LuzzxYT]

If this is what love looks like, it’s disgusting. Literally mind games

[@SkillofAttraction]

This isn't love, it's attraction(or more accurately "re-attraction")...which is one of the key ingredients to love. However, it just seems like mind games, because you've never heard the psychology behind it logically explained to you. It's naive to believe that it's something magical that happens between two people...it does seem magical, though.

[@kfoxm]

Hi Eric Me and my girlfriend broke up but without a clear braking up step She just went cold and disrespectful for sometimes plus she said it's LDR and it won't suit her, after that she texted me acting like she forget what she said then in the valentine's day 10:30 pm she told me happy valentine's with a robot meme and I replied to her after about an hour "happy valentine's day" during this hour she posted on her Instagram a girl kissing a mirror showing love to herself in valentine's day. Since then she never spoken to me only if she wants some help or something. In 21 of march she asked how's my nephew (because he was infected by covid19) I answered he's good thanks for asking and then she said don't thank me it's normal to ask about people we care about I only replied with a smily face. (Note that she haven't been asking how I am.) Next day she send something to translate for her I translated and she said (idiots) (talking about the thing I've translated) Since then we never spoke and I haven't initiated any contact I'm guilting myself sometimes And I miss her so much Eric I'm so miserable since months and lately I can't hold my tears The pain is so strong I was with her only 2.5 months then another 3 months LDR but the amount of pain I'm experiencing is stronger than anytime before Even stronger than my 5 yeas previous relationship. My feelings are like a roller coaster. Should I do something? Text and tell her that I've seen something to remind me of her Or just how are you?

[@SkillofAttraction]

I think the most important thing you should do is to start focusing on yourself & make yourself a happy, confident man. Women don't reject these men. Focus on your goals/hobbies, health/fitness, & building/maintaining your social circle...including meeting/dating new women. Right now it seems that you're waiting for something to happen with this girl & that's unattractive. You're communicating to her that you do not have options with other women & that makes women think that there's something wrong with you. While I'm not doubting the feelings you have for this girl, I feel that because you're so focus on her & focused on a particular outcome with her that it makes the pain more intense. You must change your mindset. So, I do not recommend that you contact her. Instead show her that you do not need her in order to be happy. This will make you much more attractive to her. And it's a good idea to meet/date some girls that are local. LDRs rarely work & you will be much happier with a local girl that you can date & see on a regular basis.

[@kfoxm]

@@SkillofAttraction I've dated more than 15 woman in the past 60 days Couldn't click with any of them Nothing was so intense as it was with my ex. I'm not showing any signs of sadness to her. I'm posting stuff and stories here and there and at the gym and sometimes she see it. Today she posted something about how school should teach kids how to know their strength to not be confused in life and I'm so tempted to react to that. Her birthday is couple of weeks from now and I'm also confused weather I should do or say anything or not. Note that she brought me a fancy gift for my birthday 3 months ago. It's been almost a month of no contact. Should I let her go? Should I remove her from my social media? Should I interact with her post? Should I do or say anything for her upcoming birthday? Should I go for monk mood?

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@kfoxm You probably won't click with many women at this point, especially if you're comparing them to your ex. I've made that mistake before myself. However, it's healthier for you to keep dating & staying focused on yourself. I realize that it makes sense logically to stay in contact with her & to remind her that you're available for her, but it's actually having the opposite effect of what you're hoping for. Not only do you need no contact so you can heal, but it will also give her a taste of life without you...& ultimately communicate to her that she will lose you forever unless she takes action. She will never take action if she knows that you're waiting. So, I do not recommend that you interact with her (birthdays, holidays, social media, etc) for any reason until she shows you that she has romantic interest in you again. I have a playlist of no contact videos that you may find helpful.

[@kfoxm]

@@SkillofAttraction I'm watching your videos and it's very helpful thank you really, but to be honest sometimes watching many videos itself makes me think more about her. I don't know how long I need to heal and move on, but everytime I feel that I'm good, suddenly I collapse and I suffer badly to the point that I can barely breathe, I don't know what the hell is that, it happens out of the blue without checking her social media or anything. Now we're friends on social media and I can't ignore her Instagram if she posted something because it appears on my feed. And what if she reached out and asked me why or made of me a hater or a bad person because I haven't said or done anything on her birthday. Should I answer her honestly, or jsut say I forgot and say to her happy birthday. And some say that I shouldn't distract myself because it will backfire at me later, instead I should go through the pain.

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@kfoxm Well, you do have to feel the pain & go through the typical stages of grief in order to heal...but part of healing is making yourself a better man. Your focus on self improvement WILL distract you a bit, but that's just a byproduct of turning your attention & focus elsewhere. However, you don't wan t to obsess over her. And yes, you will have good days & bad days, so occasionally feel pain after you felt better is completely normal...you're grieving a loss. She may shame you or make you feel guilty for not reaching out on her birthday, but remember...SHE broke-up with YOU. She pushed you out of her life. Do you feel that she actually deserves your attention any longer? Remember, YOU are the prize & if she doesn't want that, then it's her loss. That is how you should think about this.

[@jackassfat]

after applying no contact to people, i found out both of them already started to date and already moved on in their lives !!! Honestly things have been changed since 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s....People have less and less commitments in their relationships. People are more into this idea of trial and experience...it is not even about meeting a super nice person anymore....the reason is : people got the habit of dating...specially after their first divorce...there are tones of clips on youtube talking about relationship but all are the same ...do this or do that bla bla...you get your ex back etc...sorry but i am just done and had enough or even over loaded with all these awesome solutions!!!! so here is the big question?? what is going on in our society??? please reply me with something different !!! enough of teaching people strategies etc...hoe fix this broken glass...so again: what is going on???what is the difference between those years and today? we are the same meat and bone same feelings etc....but how come relationships marriages were more solid those days than today? we are all doomed to loneliness, depressions, addiction to watch these kind of youtube "magic" take you back clips, etc etc...why nowadays people even paying to these relationship consultants to fix it for them???!!! fix what?? what did i do wrong to get fixed??? i would like to see at least a woman come forward and reply to me: if the man you date was super nice! why you dumped him? and now that you dumped him, what are you thinking ? do you at all thinking about him? (personally i believe , she never ever even cares about the guy ...) i would to hear something different !!! something new!!! whats is the real problem?? rate of divorce in N.America is 53% and mostly filed by women!!! Why? women got more freedom nowadays? or there are more single players men who know how to ruin people marriages?etc etc??? i believe this conversation is not for teenagers or even 30 to 40 yrs old people !!!! Things changed even after 80s...people postpone their serious relationship/marriage even after age 40...the reason??? i believe just do not want to take any serious relationship responsibilities!!! all they just wanna experience more varieties....it is really messed up !!! i am sure there are lots lots of mature people out there who have similar issues...."being lonely"..need a soulmate ...just striving to settle down etc....but the common solution is: go to gym,get a hobby, etc etc....i do not think those amusements gonna solve any personal issues and even make people lonelier and more "independent" and selfish !!!! so again: what is the solution? for many many years we have been a "nice" man who falls in love ...treat her with nothing but respect !!!! and here we are ..watching these kind of clips....Is it the time to be "an ass hole" ??? " a player"?? " a kind of who gives a fuck type"???? then it works like magnet and attract women???? what the hell is going on????lol ps. sorry no time to make final punctual, grammar, etc correction on my reply...lol

[@SkillofAttraction]

What happened was the sexual revolution. Women have a lot more options these days. Men thought the sexual revolution would benefit them, so they supported it. Now women have their pick of the litter. They're naturally hypergamous, so they're going to seek out the best they can attract. The best thing a man can do is to be constantly improving himself & his sexual market value.

[@jackassfat]

thanks for the prompt reply. there ye go..there is no magic...this is what it is... "constantly improving himself & his sexual market value".... i don't even know/understand what you mean by those amazing words....?! envious of that guy in Bangladesh having his wife and a kid on the back of his bicycle...simple life ....no need to go to gym, or find a hobby etc etc...lol we are all ....forget it..anyways...i am sure you are in a "right" business as many people need your nice,warm,soothing advice...

[@Jcastro9444]

Hey coach quick question if I was the one that left her because of bad communication on her part over the coarse of 8 months we were together,she knew I loved her but was never clingy or needy. Since I walked away would she ever come back and reach out when she misses or realizes she messed up?

[@SkillofAttraction]

If she was the cause for the breakup, even though you initiated it, then that's really her department (reaching out to you & making things right). So, you cannot chase her after this. You must stick to your word & backup them up with your actions. If she truly loves you, she will not let you get away permanently.

[@Jcastro9444]

@@SkillofAttraction thanks for the advice coach,update: she came back and reached out. I said before anything we are gonna have a talk about communication and boundries. I found out she slept with her childs father right after I left her. Should I bring it up to her and tell her set boundries with that guy or should I just walk away. I feel anytime our relationship gets in a tough spot she will always go to him for emotional reassurance and sex. I don't wanna have to be worrying about that while I'm with her. Any advice coach I really would appreciate it.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Her going back to the ex anytime you two are having issues is completely unacceptable & a giant red flag. This tells me that she just does not value loyalty. Yes, you two were broken up, but her running to go sleep with him so soon says a lot about her character. I know you like her, but I highly recommend that you give this some serious thought as to whether or not you want anything long term with this girl. Personally, if my girl did that, that would be the end.

[@nosakhareanthony97]

@@SkillofAttraction My relationship ended a couple of days because she said she wants to be celibate. It hurts like hell

[@MrNooransari]

Hello sir i need ur hlp.. she brkup with me i try to convince her 4 last 30 dayz but it not working.. end knw she dateing someone.. cn i apply no contact rules on dis situation..plz advise me sir

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes! Absolutely apply no contact. You will never be able to convince a woman, or anyone, with logic to have feelings for you. Do not initiate contact with her at all until you hear from her first. If she misses you, you will hear from her some time in the future. It must be her idea, though.

[@MrNooransari]

Skill of Attraction sir after ur advice have apply no contact rule but der is one big me n my ex stay in same building we see each other ever day we both ignore each.. but she always check my WhatsApp status.. alway wnt say one more thinks she very happy with his new bf .. is any chance she will come back to me

[@SkillofAttraction]

The fact that she's checking your WhatsApp status tells me that he still has feelings for you & is checking up on you. However, you should NOT break 'no contact' until she initiates contact with you first. This is very important. You want her to contact you directly. Social media 'likes' & 'comments' do not count. Also, I recommend that you do not ignore her when you see her in your building. Just smile, but do not try to start a conversation with her unless she says something to you first. Then just be friendly, polite, charming & playful with her...& ask her one a date.