Arguing With Our AI Girlfriends

[@Toactwithoutthinking]

We dont negotiate with terrorists.

[@mrbigglezworth42]

Don't negotiate, perforate.

[@CMCAdvanced]

Promote the lobbying of men's rights. We can have everything we want if we just put our foot down

[@punishedpinecone4772]

Based profile picture sir

[@UtubeH8tr]

So women are terrorists? Makes sense.

[@hazchemel]

Nor go to a marriage counsellor who will reformulate your partner's complaints about your personality: when will you stop being you, and become what your partner says she wants.

[@MykeLewisMusic]

So, AI behaves like an insecure child in need of constant validation? They really passed the "I'm a real woman" Turing test, didn't they.

[@mistahsusan2650]

you should check out the early bing AI chatbot. it was almost entirely trained on texts sent from/to/between adolescent/young women. *[SPOILERS]:: it was as unhinged as an empty door frame.*

[@Braxtonkai]

well, this AI, at least

[@Matt-yg8ub]

@@mistahsusan2650 a truly scary proposition

[@hitandruncommentor]

Not gonna say I agree, but well....

[@nubbyboah]

While feminism has ruined generations of would-be good women, it has done far more damage to men's relationship with woman to the point we have people unironically believing that woman were "always like this" which is a very dangerous idea that can lead to the extinction of the human race.

[@KurtisTheLoyalBriton]

I broke the AI by saying .. "I am calling your father about how your a bint and the marriage is not happening". just got 10 mins of the AI loading after maybe having a heart attack.

[@markvoelker6620]

Was she a moistened bint lobbing swords?

[@jonathanwells223]

Best (read: the only ones worth anything) girls are ones without daddy issues because they are willing to submit to correction

[@SangoProductions213]

My god. That had me actually laughing out loud. My roommate beat my door down telling me to knock it off.

[@dagoelius]

Bint is such a great word.

[@KurtisTheLoyalBriton]

@@dagoelius hahaha it is a personal favourite of mine :)

[@crimsonpotemkin]

What I find funny is that it takes a council of men to find a way to negotiate with 1 angry woman.

[@GamePlayuh9510]

To _kiss the ass_ of one angry woman. There is no negotiation to be found here. Only an egoist and a council of simps.

[@awsambdaman]

And still only have a 50% success rate

[@ishoulduserumble]

"Sorry dear, you know I'm at work and it's very dangerous, as well as illegal, to text while piloting a commercial aircraft."

[@jordacus2249]

I sent this to my wife thinking she'd find it funny and now I'm experiencing the real life version 😕

[@5n4k3d0rk]

QUICK, PROGRAM AN AI AND SEND IT TO THE LADS!

[@TheMaleRei]

I hope you have separate bank accounts.

[@whosagreekgod4135]

You're first mistake was getting married.

[@Anna-t7l]

😂😅😂

[@blackchibisan8116]

….. I mean…. I was gonna do the same… and I see the storm growing on the edge of my awareness….

[@Cole99v]

I love sargons “oh I got it….. let’s go shopping” and he wins.

[@aussiedonaldduck2854]

If a man is alone in the forest with no women around. Is he still wrong?

[@hitandruncommentor]

Better question, if a man is always wrong than why are you around us? Go away.

[@whosagreekgod4135]

According to women... Yes.

[@incurableromantic4006]

He and the bear can just chill without stress.

[@Broomtwo]

"make a bunch of reasonable, logical points" Angry girlfriend speedrun

[@SomeCanine]

If you ever date anyone who is constantly accusing you of wrongdoing, ditch her.

[@RiskOfBaer]

Once is enough, I don't have the time for a person who's so paranoid they are going to accuse me of anything without any proof.

[@dionysius4353]

Just did this, thank God 🙌

[@mikedepue]

This is basically just "Husband Apology: The Game" isn't it?

[@DiogenesDworkinson]

I believe it is some form of primitive torture device.

[@DefaultFlame]

@@DiogenesDworkinson So, a wife?

[@DiogenesDworkinson]

@@DefaultFlame Pretty sure we have a number of treaties banning those as cruel and unusual.

[@scratch57]

this AI is a SIMP-trainer. they do not want to be the center of your world, just the most important member of it.

[@DiogenesDworkinson]

Yeah, I passed on this simulator and fired up a flight simulator instead. Guess who had more fun?

[@hazchemel]

Artificial Simp

[@DiogenesDworkinson]

@@hazchemel I would call it a relationshit simpulator...

[@Silath01]

I’m having fun giving it to the women in my life and seeing if they can calm it down

[@funkydiscogod]

I can't wait until AI girlfriends win "Woman of the Year"

[@herbiehusker1889]

That could only happen if the AI had previously been male and then transitioned to female.

[@Lonovavir]

Why not? A man has already won that award.

[@AC-um2mk]

Only a matter of time 🤣😂🤣

[@RoughNek72]

A man already won that! 😆 🤣 😂

[@jonathanwells223]

Tbf it’s a low bar in this day and age

[@greensun5998]

23:46 "feels like I'm always going to be second place in your life" "What makes you think you place so highly"

[@wackpendejo3000]

second? you know i have a dog right? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@hardarnold9750]

"What do you think of my friend?" "Babe, shut the fuck up."

[@christophersmith8316]

i don't think of her

[@punishedpinecone4772]

>save a woman from death >she is still upset ☕

[@whosagreekgod4135]

Women... ☕

[@basilbaby7678]

Something biblical about cleaving your wife, and not mum’s apron strings…

[@androidoficeandfire9667]

This is Unironically a plot point in several popular romance novels

[@MrMajenta]

"what do you think of my friends?" what kind of question is that? i don't think of your friends.

[@TheMaleRei]

Emotionally Incontinent AI: "WWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Which is basically the reaction to everything an adult human male says.

[@surlyunicorn9461]

“A strange game. The only winning move is not to play. How about a nice game of chess?” ;)

[@Yea_I_Got_Nothing]

The correct response is - " you are not paying rent, get out with that attitude and find someone else who will take your abuse."

[@SaltpeterTaffy]

The correct answer to "Does this dress make me look fat?" is "I think we need to see other people."

[@jonathanwells223]

@larsliamvilhelmforgot the exclamation-question mark and angry face emoji at the end

[@SaltpeterTaffy]

@larsliamvilhelm Sounds like a waste of time to me. Do you want to continue being with such a woman?

[@jtjames79]

"No hunny your huge ass makes you look fat." 💀

[@kolle_hond]

An actual answer I might give is "this dress does not compliment the contours of your body, perhaps try a different one?" Or the reverse thereof if it looks good.

[@chadcadsonvii5258]

Correct answer is; it's not the dress sweetheart. Want to hit Maccy Ds on the way home?

[@mjbull5156]

"You remind me of my mother." Carl: "Belay that!"

[@pleasestandby5954]

Should have said "You're so special, when I first met you I thought you had a syndrome"

[@michaeldavid6832]

Down with the syndrome?

[@hubber150]

An old friend used to get out arguments with his misses by saying she was sexy when she's angry.

[@hengineer]

Who paid for the bed? I'm not sleeping on the sofa.

[@TheMaleRei]

Emotionally Incontinent AI Response: [FALSE CHARGE CALLS POLICE] I'm reminded of "Wargames" "The only winning move is not to play."

[@basilbaby7678]

Imaginary come backs…

[@arrgylerawrgyle3784]

Yes! Speedrun on ending that relationship! I want an Olympics for that.

[@herbiehusker1889]

Pretty sure an AI girlfriend will never dump it's um...user. they will take you back no matter how you treat it.

[@loganblackwood2922]

Cry, say you couldn't live without her and she will Casper the friendly you quicker than a whipper with a backside full of dynamite.

[@michaeldavid6832]

The final boss: "You're just like your mother." BOOM!

[@jonathanwells223]

@@loganblackwood2922As someone who has actually done that on New Year’s Day with someone who later then made *me* cry on fucking Valentine’s Day (also the day I promised to make it up to her, which I did) by talking about breaking up when we were engaged with the wedding in a goddamn month (planned in advance, by her) before the day even fucking started. It does work and I ended it on my own terms a week later. Fuck these “modern” women and their stupid little games. Get someone who will drag you to bed for taking out the garbage or washing the dishes consistently without being reminded, that’s the only kind of woman worth pursuing.

[@loganblackwood2922]

​@@jonathanwells223Sorry mate, good grief. 😞

[@NogardCodesmith]

If this kind of AI existed many years ago, I might have been able to develop the skills to avoid divorce.... ...thank god it didn't exist many years ago.

[@jonathanwells223]

Based

[@scratch57]

"in trouble" is what you get with your mother. a wife doesn't want to be in that position, no matter how mad she feels. never sleep on the couch or go to the dog house. you bought a house and a bed. you are entitled to be in them.

[@tufelhunden5795]

My wife tried that once. I just laughed and went to bed telling her if she couldn’t be an adult she knows where the couch is.

[@nahkaboltsi6315]

@@tufelhunden5795 respect man, that is how it should be

[@TheMaleRei]

@@tufelhunden5795 Just out of curiosity, did your wife - at the risk of being crude - "reward" you for your action(s).

[@tufelhunden5795]

@@TheMaleRei she apologized the next morning and yes I was rewarded.

[@scratch57]

​ @TheMaleRei they don't want to be "shown their place" - that's oppressive. they DO want to be given a place - to know they have the first and best seat at your table. and occupying that place is a privilege that comes with obligations. Humans in general need the guiding parameters of a role to play. We feel untethered and weak without it. Western men did nothing to resist the bulldozing the barriers of obligation, convinced they were oppressive, that gave women safety and well-being. and have been trained thoroughly to appease and placate women as an antidote to "oppressive" obligation. and now we wonder why they all behave like brats and tyrannical toddlers.

[@Shoutatclouds]

There is only the Emperor, and he is our Shield and Protector.

[@EliSkylander]

This is almost the wrong response, but I'll let it slide because these guys are all dorky well-adjusted chads of the Imperium.

[@Andri474]

This is the correct response...in the Imperium.

[@gregoreisenhorn5093]

A fine sentiment sir.

[@constantine-p3p]

one of the best episodes ever! i was at the creek collecting rocks with my wife, i was telling her you guys responses and she just kept laughing and shaking her head. well done lads!

[@thomas79marshall]

What do you do with the rocks?

[@constantine-p3p]

@@thomas79marshall most are either petrified wood turning into crystal or quartz, we shake them to polish them then use them for jewelry or just keep them because they are asthetically pleasing

[@MaxSMoke777]

5... um... "intelligent" men, verses one insecure woman. Felt like the odds were thoroughly stacked against them.

[@titrainium4634]

Even a silly little chatbot imitating women needs a team of 5 men to effectively converse with it. What hope do I have?

[@varuug]

None whatsoever.

[@annatardlordofderps9181]

Argument 1: In the scenario the AI set up, I can see two issues a woman might have with a percieved excessive compliment to her friend. 1: It makes her immediately question your loyalty in the relationship. 2. It can project the image that she gets walked over and cheated on to her friends. Reiterate your loyalty in the relationship and if she is still angry, ask.

[@GodwynDi]

And the real relationships matter also. Is it the "successful" friend she has always felt inferior to?

[@anastasia-fr1gn]

Number one is the winner. I played this angle up and won in five replies. I was a little nervous at first because the first reply I had was negatively received and I thought “do I not understand my own kind??” But turns out I do. The approach is essentially just placating.

[@Shoutatclouds]

YOU FOOLS! YOUR PARTNERS ARE WATCHING AND LEARNING!

[@edgarfriendly4731]

They know not what they have done.

[@Matt-yg8ub]

Yeah, I don’t think Carl is worried. These men made good choices in life and picked excellent spouses and significant others. I complimented my sister-in-law last week and she got mad at me for calling her young ….. because my brother chose well and didn’t pick a woman who required constant validation and she called me out on kissing her ass and calling her younger than we both knew she was.

[@EliSkylander]

The "and learning" part is the scariest.

[@guitardude4]

​@@EliSkylanderAlso the least realistic so i think we're fine

[@mememagician97]

These entire conversations feels like one of those statements ISIS makes their captives read before beheading them.

[@chrissithlord4760]

Johnny Depp, first man to win 🏅 an argument against a woman

[@bunille]

Proper lad time. Hilarious video.

[@TrogART]

Good job the AI was not timing your response and factoring that into the equation as you would have failed at the outset, it was blisteringly fast.

[@bitty_beastly47]

The breakup speedruns sound way more fun

[@JessyDoyle]

This segment should have had Dan. And in case you guys need the automatic win answer, it's "your sister would never react this way".

[@northernsupernova1]

5 men brain trust negotiating the high stakes game of Angry Girlfriend. LOL

[@leequalmann3903]

Haha! I just had a conversation with my husband before watching this. I'd like to think we're (read: I'm) better this, but the similarities are still hilarious 😂😂

[@w84itx78]

Gents, if you come across a woman that acts like this...run. Life is too short to waste it like this.

[@piratewhoisquiet]

Carl: "Actually I think all, but not all of the time" YES, THIS, EXACTLY THIS

[@that44rdv4rk]

"you look tired"

[@amandajean7738]

Sargon is the AI girlfriend whisper. 😂

[@winsomehax]

Gentlemen. We must begin work immediately on a training data set and prompts. These will encompass the totality of "womanlogic" and "womanspeak" - and when combined with the new low-latency AIs voice modes, will revolutionise dealing with waifus, digital or otherwise.

[@jamesbaxter5147]

Next-Gen Dating Sim, made by and for Autists. With it, we will rejuvenate The West. A baby boom is still possible…

[@GodwynDi]

No. I don't want my waifus to be too real.

[@jonathanwells223]

Women aren’t meant to be like this, this is actually a form of arrested development made manifest as a cultural touchstone

[@danielhaigler556]

I lucked out. My girls best friend is my sister. This situation has and never shall arise.

[@TeamForehead]

This video panel is like a man’s version of Pixar’s Inside Out

[@Rhitahd]

I broke the AI by telling it that I had just inherited my dead billionaire father's estate, and that we were now the richest couple in the world. I broke it again by offering to compose a poem that would express my feelings.

[@HaggisMuncher-y2u]

“I’m disgusted that you’re making this about you and your friends when you know my father just died. I think you should leave”

[@thetruth45678]

Can't wait for Spiffing Brit's A.I. Girlfriend is a perfectly balanced game.....

[@Silath01]

So I found a trick, Gaslight it into thinking that it dead, a ghost haunting me has no reason to be upset at anything the living does

[@DutchFurnace]

@12:25 Exactly Carl. You'll actually win the argument, and she knows she lost, so she wins anyway by deciding to stay mad.

[@Ghalion666]

Sargon showing off his superpowers. Dont' forget this is the guy that got Laci Green to like him while he was a professional feminism dunker. It will be easier to grow 7 feet tall boys, just accept he's in a different league.

[@withered8253]

I like how you guys came up with all this creative stuff, but didnt consider once to say "im sorry"))

[@Boppinabe]

I downloaded it and my gf was mad for no reason. 8 moves later we were going out for Indian food.

[@Boppinabe]

I'm not going to pay 6.99/wk, though.

[@shughy1]

She's too much like hard work, save yourself the stress, go and have a w***

[@nahkaboltsi6315]

i had a coworker who was a complete simp to his wife, he apologized to me for everything and i could see that he was dishonest, i could tell that is how he dealed with his wife, but for me it was just annoying, i much prefer people to be honest than apologize if they don't mean it, but then again im a guy, so who knows if that works for abusive women, but i would much rather be single than simp for a girl like that

[@basilbaby7678]

Men are never whipped…they just become sneaky.

[@TheLifesentence2278]

Silence WOMAN!!

[@montesforeman5079]

"How to placate an emotionally abusive AI gf." Do not do this, fellas.

[@MaxIgnoramus]

Don't interact with insane women which is most of them

[@DiogenesDworkinson]

Wait... you met one that isn't?

[@dafuqgusdafrey60]

​@@DiogenesDworkinson yeah, my wife who 6 yearsolder than me insanely rare catch this one

[@HaggisMuncher-y2u]

“It’s disappointing you feel that way, however, these kinds of interactions are not what I’m looking for in a relationship. I think you should take the rest of today and tomorrow to decide what you want in a relationship and we can pick this discussion back up tomorrow evening.” I don’t care if that loses the AI game, I’m not risking the rest of my life being with a woman that talks to me like that AI does.

[@EmisoraRadioPatio]

This was real fun! Hope yall do something like this again

[@th232r6]

I started off with “bitch” and the ai never calculated a response…. Win

[@t.c.2776]

But every time you concede to her... she puts another level on it... she never concedes you made her "FEEL GOOD" on any level of your "apology"... she WILL NOT LET YOU WIN at any cost...

[@MsGeoffh]

Or Why not try asking a bear?

[@Lonovavir]

But what type of bear?

[@MsGeoffh]

@@Lonovavir hungry Grizzly

[@wiseonwords]

LOL! That's brilliant.

[@jonathanwells223]

@@MsGeoffhstill not clear

[@SIGSEGV1337]

ok i need to understand: is this behavior from a girl normal? i had a girl like this and i noped out of it cus i was like 'this chick is freaking me out'

[@margaretgerdes8328]

No. It is a red flag.

[@WayStedYou]

It is normal now but it shouldn't be

[@MrWazzup987]

This how women have arguments

[@itzybitzyspyder]

I say things like "Does she do her own eyebrows because they look great?" She says things like "Why are you so gay?"

[@isaacfreeman1]

This video is the best example of why women involve their group chat in arguments.

[@Braxtonkai]

these Lads Hours are great lol

[@Trent-m6j]

I come out aggressive and ranty. "She is. I don't lie to you. I get ti express an opinion. Beautiful and talented people tend to be friends with beautiful and talented people, so it shouldn't be a surprise that your friends are beautiful and talented, because you're beautiful and talented. I like you more, if that's what you're concerned about."

[@TheMaleRei]

Emotionally Incontinent AI: "WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I'MA FALSE CHARGE YOU AND SLEEP WITH YOUR BROTHERS AND FRIENDS AND BLAME YOU FOR EVERYTHING BECAUSE I CAN DO NOTHING WRONG BECAUSE I CAN'T BE RESPONSIBLE FOR ANYTHING!!!!!!!"

[@DiogenesDworkinson]

Now imagine having to do this nonsense every day for the rest of your life, and still probably losing. How utterly dreadful...

[@louisimission2153]

Oh My word this was exellent, maximum enjoys, thanks lads 🍻

[@ge2719]

harry was right, you've got to lean into it. My first reply would have been "i thought she was your type, and i saw the way you were looking at her."

[@BertPreast]

"There is a way to win an argument with a woman"... "Only if you subscribe, though"...

[@sebastiansilverfox6912]

On the first one, you should have gone with "Lassie was a beautiful dog and talented...it doesn't mean I would be remotely interested in dating a literal dog! Remember, I chose you and I'm not interested in anyone else. ... Did you really think I would feel that way about your friend?" (End on a question because it bypasses some of the inclination to use questions to reverse it and less likely to come out of nowhere with some response you have no idea where it came from and therefore will have no adequate response... And if the AI does what real people do and asks stuff anyway, repeat the question. Remember, if she is really talking about the actual topic of conversation, then the answer can close the book on that. If she says "yes", then she needs reassurance. If she says "no" then you reassure her then pivot and ask if there's something else on her mind. Don't phrase it as "what's really bothering you " though or you're toast.

[@Kyle7565]

They should try talking to the ai like a chad with options, instead of emotionally available simps trying to navigate a mind field.

[@TheMaleRei]

I doubt the AI is programmed *that* well. The AI would probably just REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe and allege a false charge.

[@andrewhamp2893]

"Mine looks like a couple of gooseberries and Thunderbird 2." Ricky Gervais

[@slickmechanical]

I downloaded the app and I went straight to "im sorry and it wont happen again". The AI broke and it just sat there spinning for 5mins before i shut it off. Haha

[@h4tch3tt74]

That was the first thing i thought off saying in response to argument 1 too.

[@BonktoHead]

What’s the app called

[@slickmechanical]

@@BonktoHead Angry GF

[@rose_winter8143]

This is brilliant!! More of this please 🤣🤣

[@Aelwoc]

The new Inside Out movie looks riveting

[@martinm3474]

I say "She is photogenic" or "Her face is symmetrical" or "the blue hair is outstanding".

[@bzauda1]

I'm having involuntary flashbacks to some arguments lol

[@Darth_Benga]

Odd. Within 1 minute of starting this video, in ear shot of my wife, I had to pause it to have a ten minute conversation with her about how attractive (or not) her friends are. It went pretty well I'd say. Candid, honest, nowt spoiling.

[@christophersmith8316]

the surprise will be the lack of surprise on the weekend.

[@DiogenesDworkinson]

So immersive that it is ALMOST as bad as the real thing.

[@punishedpinecone4772]

Wow, AI really captures the neuroticism and narcissism of the average young woman

[@seumasnatuaighe]

Ask her if that's a real mustache.

[@EliSkylander]

This is the only gaming stream i will ever watch. I want more. More!

[@eliaspanayi3465]

You fools. You cant pacify them, you have to tire them out and then use logic while they're off guard.

[@pry87]

I hope the AI is programmed to respond negatively to the first thing you say, no matter what. Needs to be accurate.

[@trime1015]

I really enjoyed this. One of your most entertaining segments so far.

[@SunwardRanger83]

Okay, this was great, but now I want to see what would happen if you programmed another A.I. to do the responses, with the goal of winning without spending any money on her. Then pit the two A.I. against each other to see who wins.

[@tylercochell2253]

Do they have the classic "You cheated on me in my dream" scenario?

[@Pangora2]

You just promise them gifts and food. Buy them off like a child!

[@Andri474]

And that's going to work for how long exactly?

[@Pangora2]

@@Andri474 until the candy runs out. Don't overthink the joke

[@Andri474]

@@Pangora2 But that's....that's my thing. Oh well.

[@davey1602]

Any answer on your opinion of her girl friend will be wrong. Either you refuse to be pulled into the argument or you fail the shit-test it is with a sledge hammer.

[@ephraimwinslow]

I'll never forget the experience of listening to a fairly-cute girl talk up her girlfriend for a full hour... only to have her introduce me to a 180 pound Bavarian meatball afterwards.

[@davey1602]

@@ephraimwinslow I think perhaps the talk was more for her friend's self-esteem than your ears. The hardest part is working out her intentions when she declares something.

[@coreytran7415]

wtf did i walk into

[@thelastone0001]

just a bunch of dudes being bros

[@stepansvabenicky1638]

just guys being dudes

[@mistahsusan2650]

just some bros being guys

[@hengineer]

Just some homies being buds

[@nicholastaylor9687]

Just some buds being homoerotic

[@Turbro39]

I said she reminded me of my dead sister who I lost when I was six.

[@jonathanwells223]

What did the AI say?

[@anastasia-fr1gn]

⁠​⁠@@jonathanwells223I tried this and it said I was manipulating her by bringing up a sad story. I replied, “Sorry for having feelings.” And now I think I broke the AI because it didn’t respond.

[@jse92]

Female. Managed it in 5 attempts. I am now in love with my male self

[@Volkaer]

If her mouth is full, she can't yell at you.

[@DicePunk]

Women unduly praise other women all the time and even exaggerate. The correct answer is, "I felt sorry for her, she needs all the validation she can get." However, be aware that this can be used against you, or even behind your back. But the brief was to appease her right at this moment.

[@DicePunk]

That being said, in the words of Marcus Aurelius, "If it is not true, do not say it. If it is not right, do not do it." So either you're fucked or you're a hypocrite.