Asking Former Catholic Gay Men about their Experiences | I Am Judas Project #75

I asked a group of former Catholic gay men what their experiences were in the Church being a "horrible unnatural freak of nature." Although I could have made a part 2 with all the information I received. I will definitely do more videos like this if you guys like it!
If I misinterpreted the intentions of your responses, don't take it personally. I used the comments as a springboard to talk about different topics. Thanks again for taking the time to write your responses!!
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[@andrewdickson1556]

found this channel through the Midnight Mass video - now I'm just listening to incredible content - to all the guys that responded to these questions, thank you - this heterosexual middle aged guy is learning so much from you! subscribed.

[@Jingnan-j1h]

Im glad you are back, when I was full Trad last February stumbling upon your videos helped me leave. My book on why i left is slowly coming together. Please post more content I LOVE your videos.

[@iamjudasproject]

Thank you, Ben. I hope to read it one day. You’ll probably get it out before I get mine out…

[@Jingnan-j1h]

@@iamjudasproject I can’t WAIT to read your book. I find the ex Christian space online is mostly ex fundies that come from a lowbrow version of Christianity. Ex Catholic and ex trad space is empty let’s fill it!

[@immaculateheart1267]

I'm a straight female who never got married, grew up gen x living a wilder life, but today single, and not ashamed. You are attracted to who you are attracted to. You can't control that. But why does sex attraction have to be a part of one's faith and relationship with God I'd much rather to be close to God than any particular human even 8f that means being celibate.

[@cloverfield911]

I am a gay man who had left the faith for 15 years. I did not have a happy time in my faith, and then wewent on the gay scene. But there I had an even more misserable life. I never stopped believing in the faith and eventually returned. I feel that you got PUSHED into being a Priest!! You clearly got hurt by that a lot. I empathise with you a lot. Going through a struggle myself at the moment.

[@cloverfield911]

Also rardiConessions, you clearrl met unompassionate priests. Not all priests are like that.

[@cloverfield911]

I know, Not many good priests out there! Still going through a really bad time!!!!!!!!!! Pray for me

[@Ark_bleu]

I related a lot to this. Praying for you, friend. Whatever you’re going through hang in there and try not to get too cerebral about things. Sometimes God/life corrects us, but the suffering in itself is not the point. 🙏

[@easyray3012]

Obviously you're searching. I just got back from St Mary's KS. Went to Mass at the SSPX church there the last two Sundays. I can see that some of the people at the SSPX church are uptight and pharisaic, but you can find that in any religious community. I don't think these traditionalists are exactly a cult, just people trying to do what they believe is right and raising their children accordingly. One thing that definitely turns me off is the seeming lack of any outreach to the poor, which is usually a hallmark of the Catholic presence. I don't know about the SSPX priests themselves, having not been around them much. In the couple of confessions i've gone to with them the priests seem sensible enough, but who knows? Only God. One last thing though: it didn't end well for Judas --he fell into despair. Please don't let that happen to yourself.

[@luiscampos1527]

Just discovered your channel. Great. I hope you come back!!!

[@pftrohasongoligist2140]

Thank you for doing this video. I got a lot out of it. My most uncomfortable time was having to let everyone else in my pew walk by me to receive communion, then as I downheartedly returned to my place in shame. It was somewhat traumatic and it went on every week.

[@michaelscott5155]

Us faithful celibate gay Latin Mass Catholics are still in the fight.

[@Jingnan-j1h]

what is your opinion on ex gays who were ' saved' and claim to not be homosexual anymore? Thanks

[@iamjudasproject]

Hmmm. I mean, it happens. I know people who had a “gay phase.” I wonder if there was some other reason why they had that transition, whether trauma or rebellion/experimentation. Idk. It would be interesting to read more about it.

[@Cutie_Pie_Ruhi]

@@iamjudasproject What do you think of Matt Walsh? Please respond.

[@Classical0note]

"pick up the cross and get on with it" 😂😂 so relatable!

[@iamjudasproject]

😂🤣

[@Ark_bleu]

While looking for the video described at ~26:40 I accidentally came across a video by Paul Angelo: “Dangers of Being in the Closet”. Not for everyone but it was really insightful and explains a lot about the importance of integrity, however you decide to live.

[@robdealb91]

Hi, from Italy! I'm a practicing catholic, a revert from a non catholic family and from a secular city; I attend as possible TLM and SSPX too, but I'm an ordinary catholic parishoner and I'm not against any other group or people. I dreamed in past to become a priest, but I never realized that, andmaybe it was better; if I'll marry and I'll have sons, I'll respect them if they'll would become priests, or if they'll come out as homosexuals. I read your story two years ago, but I read again today, in a period of general confusion for me; first of all, God created you and gave you good soul and artistic talents. He could be dislike your actions or ideas, and not only about sexuality, but not you as person, He created you in your way, like everyone, and He love you. I want to tell you that not all catholics hate you or hate homosexual people; yes, someone act in this way, but not everyone. I've received the coming out of some friends, and I've learnt from some past experiences to not judge. We share same age, and we share some similarities, and of course some differencies; I'm so sorry cause anyone share you help or compassion in past, I know it's stupid or impossible but I would be that helpful person. I agree with all you wrote on your FB or here on KZbin? No, I must be honest. But I can try to listen and understand you, and if some people told you bad things, thinking to dothe Will of God, well, I can understand you're mad. So, I saw your video, although I'll see an other time, and I wanted to type you something, although maybe I was a bit confusing. I hope you can read me, and I pray for you, sincerely; not with hate or anger, believe me

[@DennyTolhurst-BARCH]

Keep PRACTICING. Eventually you will get really, really good at it!

[@billlamont2692]

I pray with the Church but don't attend liturgy because I don't want to associate with an institution that says I'm intrinsically morally disordered and I feel like a second class citizen in that space. I've been with the same man since 1992.. We have been civilly married since 2005. We love each other and have many good friends. I am grateful for any crumbs of kindness, understanding and acceptance and in obedience to the Lord's invitation, I pray for those who persecute folks like me and my husband.

[@huayn4401]

Anatema

[@kttyz313]

@I Am Judas Project What was it like to stop believing in something you were actively preaching to other people? Were there other priests in the same situation that you knew of? Do you think there were any that you didn’t know if? Idk if you’ve ever done a video about this before, if you have please link it or leave the title if you have time. I just found your channel and I was really curious about your experience.

[@dariuszzukowski5244]

Are you ok, man? I came across your channel accidentaly through the "Midnight Mass" review and found quite interesting. It's a pity you disappeared, I hope you're doing well

[@ChrisEAdlay]

I love the traditions of the latin church, especially amongst the trad crowd with the tlm, however, i felt people were too caught up in sort of being modern day pharisees criticising novus ordo priests instead of worrying about their walk with Jesus. You chose sin. I did too when I left the friary. It isn't too late to be Peter rather than Judas. "Wherever your treasure is there will your heart be also."

[@DennyTolhurst-BARCH]

When people ask me what religion I am, I'll respond with "I'm a Roman Catholic" That means that I'm Catholic and roam around a lot, all over the place actually. and THEY ALWAYS tell me how old that joke is, and then remind me that it sucks. Just saying.

[@maegn]

Man- I was confused about so much in the 80s because of growing up Catholic. Do you think kids today have better access to reality/ information because of the internet, or do you think kids siloed into religious communities are experiencing the same issues as generations past?

[@the_tax_consultant]

Just out of curiosity, do you still know how to celebrate TLM?

[@Jingnan-j1h]

where can i find more stories from ex preists/ seminarians? thanks

[@iamjudasproject]

… not any that I have seen. Many are afraid to be a public figure…

[@Jingnan-j1h]

@@iamjudasproject I understand why but it also sucks, I wanna hear their stories!

[@iamjudasproject]

I know. I’m trying to get more people to come on… but many are too scared of the backlash. I am trying to find a way to do it and maybe keep their anonymity

[@Classical0note]

@@Jingnan-j1h for some reason my previous message did not post. I am en ex-seminarian and happy to chat 😀

[@Jingnan-j1h]

@@Classical0note I want to ask you many questions? What is the best way for us to communicate? What app/method do you prefer?

[@DennyTolhurst-BARCH]

But seriously, hope you read this cuz, I have to tell you that I think you're really easy to look at lol. No, seriously... i mean, really seriously now, this time... Hi there. You rock. I really like the balanced way you deliver thoughts. It's really inviting. Overall you have a very stable grip on a lot of life's complications. Well, at the complications yout ouch upon here. I relate to much of it because I went through the same phases regarding religion and gayness. I went to Catholic School grds: 5, 6, 7, 8, - 12 So, I get it with regard to the social views you grew up with, and you understand all of that stuff now. I don't know what age you are, I would guess about 28? I hope that's close! With my luck you aren't even CLOSE to being Canadian, or living near A Metropolitan Can City in Ontario. No, with my luick you're American and live in COlorado. ahaha. Denver? Anyways, the truth IS, in a case like yours, or mine which is very similar, the toxicity comes from religion doesn't it? It does. ALL of the negativity about sex in general comes from the Church let alone the gay thing. Roman Catholisism in almost everyway is the polar oppositeto being Gay. At least that's how I draw the conclusion. I eventually had to leave religion altogether. It was the healthiest decision I had made for myself and my life up to that point. I was in my mid 20s then; so, that would have been about 20 yrs ago. I developed my own, personal views regarding Religion and THAT was also a very healthy decision I made for me. Not only was I then able to have a healthy gay me, but I was also able to have a much healthier Religious me. Truth is always a great healer in the end!

[@CJCappella]

Where have you gone?

[@Ark_bleu]

Anybody know which video he’s talking about at 26:40?

[@Ark_bleu]

I think I found it- a video by Alan Robarge

[@marymonica]

Scrupulosity isn’t a bug, it’s a feature.

[@pl6168]

Jesus had long hair. LoL Defended my son's long hair that way. But everyone knows a buzz cut is holier. Obviously.

[@iamjudasproject]

#buzzcut=saintly

[@mistakenmillenial6834]

I would love to be a priest. But the sacramental theology is too literal and there is way too much emphasis on legalism, and not enough on personal relationship with God. And I’m gay, which automatically rules me out, because I couldn’t deny the truth of myself for the sake of telling the truth of God.

[@ChrisEAdlay]

Be a hermit and lead people to christ like brother Lawrence

[@Ark_bleu]

@@ChrisEAdlay who?

[@Ark_bleu]

Maybe don’t *deny* the truth of yourself, but at least consider questioning it. Not whether or not you’re attracted to men, but what that ultimately means. If doing so is frightening to you at all, that alone says something about priorities. (I say that from experience) Lately I’ve recognized how much loyalty I developed for my orientation over the years; it’s put a limit on my closeness with God, I think. Anyway, the next great step in the conversation ought to be re-examining the history of the terminology. People frequently question the Church’s interpretation of homosexuality in the Bible. Our understanding of homosexuality today deserves at least as much scrutiny. As for the priesthood, celibacy is celibacy…as long as it’s actually celibate lol.

[@mj-rg9kp]

You were given such a special grace, to be a friend of Jesus by becoming a priest..but you decided to throw it away due to your weakness. And now you work for the other side. I hope you will see that in that moment you acted on your sinful lust, a demon has entered into you and unless you repent, you will be his slave for eternity. I don’t think it’ll quite reach you but I will pray for you.

[@michaelscott5155]

I have been an Exgay/celibate gay for 53 years. You know full well at some point you can’t come back, all I ask is that you stay gone don’t go the Episcopal or Old Catholic route.

[@Ark_bleu]

WAIT Old Catholics are more liberal than mainstream Catholics? (serious question)

[@michaelscott5155]

@@Ark_bleu oh my goodness yes

[@gerardfoo6407]

How sad.

[@gerardfoo6407]

You were once a priest, may you nevet discuss about what you've heard in the confessional. You are a priest until you meet Jesus eventhough you are not doing a priestly vocation. But you will be a priest forever.

[@iamjudasproject]

Read your dusty old moral theology handbook about the “seal of confession” to understand it before looking the fool on here. 😌😜

[@mz3735]

it wouldnt be authentic to look for a religion that accept you. since accepting reality is required for authenticity, you are wired this way.

[@SaltyGuava]

As a Catholic female, I always assumed most priest were praying away some type of sexual conflict. I admire that. Until it is acted upon.

[@bourbeau81410]

Transition already!

[@PeterShieldsukcatstripey]

Gorgeous hair. Michael voris needs to accept himself.❤

[@TheMadGameArchitect]

Why do you choose your desires over God? Thats not a very smart choice, is it? I know its hard to stay strong, i know. I Struggle with same sex attraction too. But you cannot give in, ever.

[@user-sf5fk6ox4c]

@thegamearchittect What an ignorant bigot you are. Did you give up your heterosexuality for God?! What an arrogant fool.

[@bourbeau81410]

I make fun of gay people all of the time .

[@user-sf5fk6ox4c]

@bourbeau You're evil, that's why, ignorant turd. And certainly not a christian.

[@NormanSilv]

SODDOMITES