ASMR Reading Excerpts from The Book of DOS (The 5.0 Version)

[@OutOfShape]

my girl just broke it off the other day after 3 years. it's tough, but with the strength provided by the Book of MS-DOS we will get through.

[@starbrx]

Don't worry in France we say "One of lost ten of found" when we stop a relationship with a woman xD.

[@Milk-vw1cv]

She's broke your up 😤

[@Em-gd4vc]

Focus on yourself bro

[@provethioaltum3276]

Im sorry. More than likely shes getting rammed by someother guy. Cheer up bro

[@vincezockt127]

@@starbrx NICE

[@emmiehardwicke4388]

Instantly sent this to my husband. He doesn't understand asmr but this will still definitely relax his nerdy brain.

[@spravodlivykritik2439]

Your husband is one lucky man

[@zacharyalfano9846]

Cringe

[@j.alvare.z8902]

@@zacharyalfano9846 its the small details in life that matter the most, youll learn it later ig

[@electricletsplay2056]

@@j.alvare.z8902 👏🏼👏🏼

[@Fighting_Fatigue_117]

What's cringy about that? Seriously, I feel like I'm missing something... Man, Rift seems to have a few trolls in his comments.

[@gregoryl.3594]

Good old DOS, I’ll never forget the first command my brother taught me: cd/doom doom

[@connorsarles]

Hahaha wow, I had a dosbox I played doom on when I was like 9, and my dad taught me that exact same thing

[@okayokay12]

@@kashkendall5146 must be a promotion for an app I will try it I just tried it I'm not having two wings and a smol pp

[@HoneyDog]

@@kashkendall5146 Hm, two accounts with default profile pictures. Both created a week ago. Both only have one comment on this channel, and one of them is promoting a obviously fake app. Hmmm, could this maybe be the same person trying to promote a shitty virus?? Holy hell you must be actually stupid if you think people are gonna fall for your bullshit.

[@YankeeStacking]

It’s actually cd\doom 😉

[@polybius223]

@@YankeeStacking C:\cd doom

[@TheOneAndOnly004]

He could read the back of a shampoo bottle i will fall asleep to it

[@gamey__4642]

Dont say that or next we will be listening to "back of a shampoo bottle asmr"

[@chadderbug7587]

@@gamey__4642 It'd be short most likely

[@gamey__4642]

@@Gamo0ol because first we need to hear the full manual of DOS

[@moneymindedmenenespanol2749]

@SharkTank are you just copying and pasting that ya lil Weiner

[@crusaderknight2891]

@SharkTank FUCK YOU

[@U_C_G]

Glad the Sanitarium is getting a tech upgrade. Long overdue I thought! Last I checked, Corvus was still making his medical notes on wood carvings

[@beetlequeen1732]

My nurse was pounding out cuneiform prescriptions on a clay tablet :/

[@redpikdman]

@@beetlequeen1732 💀

[@pogfish4701]

yeah I was using hieroglyphi- oh that's just my handwriting

[@thevideocamman5674]

its 1991!

[@MSDesignASMR]

This takes me way back... probably before I was born.

[@okluminous566]

gold comment

[@hometownboy6537]

Same this takes me back, a decade before I was born. :)

[@Jack10158]

He will never run out of ideas

[@Tom-vu1wr]

Like chip will never run out of bars

[@ize7821]

I swear he just looks at anything and shouts Eureka

[@Jack10158]

@@ize7821 exactly

[@surthing6711]

Well its kind of hard to go wrong, if this gets accepted as a good idea. And of course, why not. All he has to do is not be loud, and be himself. Its not like there are any objects that just cant be used for asmr. No hate, just dont get how some people seem to be really amazed by him just not going with the flow of never ending head massages.

[@surthing6711]

And not to disregard his very creative roleplays and rift world!

[@frogtape4305]

That feel when this is unironically too interesting to fall asleep to.

[@epicscream1234]

Mr. Prog

[@UnderaRockGaming]

Just came here to like in advance, cant wait to fall asleep to this. I worked at Blockbuster back in the day and they operated on a version of dos so im excited to watch this and see if i remember or recognize anything. Also r.i.p block buster

[@TheOneGodofMadness]

Recognize anything?

[@kellen4671]

I used to go there and rent movies all the time as a kid. The gold ol no toyota corrola virus days

[@UnderaRockGaming]

Just starting the first actual watch. If i dont fall asleep ill let you know later.... if i fall asleep... well most likely ill tell you tomorrow lol

[@ThomasParrish]

@@UnderaRockGaming lol i miss blockbuster

[@UnderaRockGaming]

Me too, so so so much. Probably the job i was most suited for which might say a lot about me, but i dont care.

[@willis32]

A reading from the divine tome of the Omnissiah, we truly are blessed today.

[@alexraley4733]

Praise the omnissiah!!

[@prohikikomo]

PRAISE!!!

[@normantent]

PRAISE THE OMNISSIAH

[@DOGMA20051]

POV: You're Professor Clemmons during the 1990's trying to figure out your new fangled 'Personal Computer'.

[@projectdaaltaran]

The 2 dislikes must be from mac guys.

[@benthompson9135]

17 there’s More than I thought

[@jheitz223]

Linux > Windows > macOS

[@TheDismissor]

@@jheitz223 did you forget that a majourity of software is linux incompatible

[@Ozukai]

@@TheDismissor guy who literally has er as their pfp, a legend if i can add

[@ghostrangerz8273]

@@jheitz223 Linux is cool and all, but let’s be real here. For just about every situation It’s: Windows > Linux > macOS

[@bobveinne2439]

"You could make a religion out of this!"

[@skitsyn8989]

Bill wurtz was here

[@severeautism5055]

Let's do this

[@ChristianRandorff]

Yes, hail the mighty cult of DOS (5.0)

[@yatzeegamingop]

A guy actually did it. He called it "Temple OS", basically os from god. He later went nuts due to mental ilnesses.

[@edmundofuentes7940]

The religion would be so fake

[@dogski2822]

I love how a manual for an outdated operating system is basically the ER universe's Bible now.

[@JuniperF]

I mean if somethings archaic enough, it can and will become a religion. If this religion existed, I would be a follower

[@priestofcheesuscrust9825]

Palpatine approved

[@ciaranjamiesonfamily-frien5144]

M’aiq Approved or didn’t he? M’aiq does not know.

[@getjoosed]

@@ciaranjamiesonfamily-frien5144 yes

[@ciaranjamiesonfamily-frien5144]

@@getjoosed ahh but only M’aiq can verify what M’aiq saw, but if M’aiq cannot remember what he saw, did what M’aiq supposedly see ever happen?

[@brremsilverte.9022]

Awesome! I was wondering if I should watch this or not because I could not find an official Palpatine seal of approval anywhere, but luckily I found it!

[@packingpeanuts4175]

Approved by the Emperor himself

[@abogus1756]

Dude I really needed this. I work as a C# programmer, and this whole video legitimately subconsciously resonated with me. I feel like I learned so much while getting a good night’s sleep. So, thank you.

[@Maxwellcafou]

I think he the first and last person to actually read this

[@Fighting_Fatigue_117]

God, imagine having to be the person to make them.

[@Charu0]

@@Fighting_Fatigue_117 true pain

[@stickydolphin5038]

No, we have to read this stuff in IT Class.

[@rococoblue]

You'd be surprised😎.

[@theHerathrig]

LGR probably reads this for fun.

[@CraftMine1000]

As a programmer this is very relaxing, the dos 5 manual does a really good job explaining everything in ordinary language, nice change of tone from how I usually absorb this type of information

[@Jesus-wi1tt]

I am so happy he is so close to 1 million subs, he deserves it.

[@Charu0]

I'm also happy for him

[@Vynecloud]

I applaud your extraordinary patience. I wouldn’t have made it even a page in.

[@ankarikunodawu5966]

doing my operating systems homework while listening to this lol

[@QuaversASMR]

Same, doing an OS exam

[@dubslayer4207]

Hope you get an a+

[@Fighting_Fatigue_117]

Some school. Sounds like college.

[@Calibur43]

I remember being 5 years old launching Duke Nukem and Carmageddon from MS-DOS

[@r.i.pjuicewrld7941]

Omg PLEASE continue this as a series where you do an in depth reading of totally mundane and random things 😍

[@henry7001]

What an exceptionally thrilling video, I was on the edge of my seat the whole time.

[@persephone9084]

Ah yes, miss those days, when i didn’t exist

[@texanplayer7651]

This is your father's MS-DOS, this is the machine of the 80s whitecollar, not as clumsy or random as a smartphone... An elegant machine, for a more civilized age.

[@andrewmaderer1989]

@@texanplayer7651 the 80’s civilized lol. We know this guys not gay!

[@texanplayer7651]

@@andrewmaderer1989 You didn't get the reference did you?

[@ffwast]

@@texanplayer7651 all he knows about is being gay.

[@texanplayer7651]

@@ffwast Why would you people talk about being gay? What does that have to do with an obi wan quote? Was the actor gay or something? Or why are you mentioning gays?

[@bluepatriot6078]

I feel bad for the poor souls who’s job it was to write and compile this whole book. I would absolutely end my life unless I’m being paid a substantial fee

[@endermage77]

I would start writing a book like this completely unprompted. Granted, I would forget about it and go do something else before I even finished chapter 2, but the thought still counts.

[@YaEliRoCz]

The people that write manuals/user guides are called technical writers. I am a technical writer. The pay is great, most jobs are work from home, it is flexible hours. It is much less boring when writing them, as opposed to reading them. It also does require a high level of creative problem solving, as you need to be able to write highly technical concepts in a fashion that is simple and easy to understand.

[@Jesus-wi1tt]

I get tingles just thinking about this. That's how you know he's good.

[@yugonediee]

Of course he is he’s been doing this for a long time like we talking YEARS

[@erratmorning3703]

@@yugonediee fork knife

[@mouhibgh6928]

@@yugonediee fork knife

[@nevar23]

Flashback to 1996 me trying to figure out how to run games on my first computer, then feeling like a tech god when I actually got it right. 😁

[@tanksherman8953]

I love his pronunciation and whisper level. Its not to forced or to quiet. Very relaxing and sleep inducing; I love it.

[@puckmarin]

Huge ASMR fan, but I’ve never checked out this guy before. This video came up as recommended. It went on my ASMR favorites playlist after about 30 seconds. Phenomenal for sleep!!

[@dixieandbuck]

That book is probably older than i am. And is in much better shape than i am.

[@rococoblue]

😂.

[@cass_the_weirdo]

He needs to do the fitnessgram pacer test at some point

[@mouhibgh6928]

bro i am trying to sleep not get a ptsd atack

[@crispybacon556]

As a request, I would love to hear ER read the KZbin terms of service.

[@rococoblue]

Something tells me it will get...

[@gamesux420]

I can connect MY home computer to another computer from another building or even ACROSS THE COUNTRY? The wonders of technology!

[@thatreddude8796]

I started this video as a human, but I have now transcended to that of a floppy disk

[@bobveinne2439]

you're just evolving, but backwards

[@kilo3989]

Mom: What are you doing? 🤨 Me: I'm studying. 💤

[@PeterGriffin-kb2hf]

If you own a DOS machine, it would be really cool to see you use it for asmr. Those old keyboards sound nice and I'm sure there's something you could do with it during the video. Or you could just do a new zork asmr :) Keep up the great videos!

[@vorloran1315]

Thank you, Peter Griffin of Quahog

[@llynxfyremusic]

The clicking sound computers make is really relaxing

[@elijahpolen5872]

Thank you, Peter Griffin of Quahog

[@milosvuco]

00:20:29 Finally, after all these years, I can finally start MS-DOS

[@geoffw6007]

The only video that everyone fully watches when trying to learn how to operate a computer Edit: Also please do another video covering what you didn't read please! This video is so good at getting me to sleep!

[@CausticAscarite]

Relatable. Such techy texts have a big potential to make someone feel asleep very easily while keeping the interest in what is being read

[@TheDamisen]

Do you guys think I’ll be able to understand if I haven’t read versions 1-4 yet?

[@theharbingerofdawn7207]

"Imagine, if you will, a world where the people's religious holy book is a Microsoft MS-DOS user manual."

[@rococoblue]

That would be great for me😏.

[@julianprice9947]

This is a great piece of literature that is massively underrated

[@lindseymashburn-fonzeroth1806]

This guy makes pure gold. Rift, you're amazing. Thank you for all your wonderful vids. Hope to see another book reading video in the future. They're my favorite

[@teawings4391]

This man litteraly never runs out of ideas! He always thinks of something

[@tyraelhermosa]

I literally have fallen asleep to this at least ten times now. This is amazing 😅

[@shield5747]

Ah Yes the holy scriptures

[@aaron-crokmay]

Holly shit so my prayers do come true a pure whispering video i have wished for this for the last year

[@selfsaboteur]

We will now bow our heads for a reading from the Book of DOS. 🤓

[@OctoEdlt]

Apple pfp, L

[@sirsalt430]

ER is like an unwritten character from the hitchhikers guild to the galaxy

[@mr.statefarm1210]

This asmr video absolutely BANGS. I’ve fell asleep multiple times to this. This is the asmr equivalent to stairway to Heaven. Absolute fucking CLASSIC. BRING ON THE DOS BABY WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[@chyaboi11]

ASMR and a long book, two perfect things to fall asleep to. The man's a genius.

[@villelepoaho4105]

They don't make classic literature like this anymore :(

[@82dorrin]

Wow. MS-DOS. Brings back memories.

[@michaelroberts2172]

This man is covering EVERY piece of possible ASMR there is in the world. He is the DEFINITION of an ASMRtist

[@jackfart2227]

He could literally just whisper-read a random book and we would all be entertained.

[@jakebrown6153]

Is that not what he just did?

[@jonbenzaia]

lol yeah thats what he did

[@supersonic20091]

I'm surprised he hasn't read excerpts straight out of the Lovecraft books.

[@captainobvious9526]

He never really will run out of ideas. It’s impossible.

[@supersonic20091]

Thanks Captain Obvious!

[@Fighting_Fatigue_117]

I just want to know what came first, the saying or the advert?

[@Melodical_Baphomet]

@@Fighting_Fatigue_117 the chegg

[@benilginocchio]

Considering that all windows versions are based on ms dos and many operations' name is the same this is actually extremely useful even today.

[@YankeeStacking]

I literally read this manual early in my IT career. But it didn’t put me to sleep like this! 😂

[@dragonstudios7024]

Congratulations ephemeral rift you are so close to 1 million subscribers. I've been a huge fan since the earlier days of your channel. I've always wanted to be an asmrtist. Thank you for inspiring thousands of people.

[@Atzy]

I feel that the meaning of the term "online help" have changed. Back then I think it meant help that is available through the program you are running, as opposed to a paper manual

[@drewpetitties5168]

Internet Explorer: "Write that down, write that down!"

[@marcusanark2541]

Uncle E continues to surprise me with his creative ideas, I love it.

[@Aziz-fb5dx]

I hope that he does 'The Art of Quiet 3' and I’m sure that I’m not the only one who wants it

[@LuCkKyStEpHeN]

oh boy as a CS major ive been waiting for this one ;)

[@erik8727]

2 suggestions: A tellsell commercial for a Greates Inaudible Hits and a matchmaking service for nemesis

[@OneEdgyAngerSniper]

E.R. *says words* Me: *visibly melts into relaxed state*

[@chrisdalton8467]

I would really love a full reading even though I know it will probably never happen. Would definatelty pay for it.

[@paneminadarkness4113]

This sounds like an ad and I'm not complaining

[@theroadstopshere]

As a CS PhD student, I am incredibly pleased to see this and will be telling people I fall asleep to it every night in order to increase my computer scientist street cred. Gonna flex on all those uppity web dev bois with my oldschool, CLI swagger, and high-quality ER-facilitated sleep (which is the bigger flex tbh) Edit: just now caught the added bit about deleting files you might want hidden from family, FBI, or KGB. Nice. Very much in the spirit of the old CS world, although I'm sure the makers of MS-DOS didn't include that addendum for obvious reasons. Got a real laugh out of me, though.

[@Peeps40836]

Now THIS is the type of ASMR I could relax to.

[@debayanghosh5117]

Do more like these. Reading asmr is the best.

[@Vekurus]

5 rocked... but 6.21 BABY! DOS 5.0, HDM for a menu, Word Perfect 5.x on, Lotus 123, on an IBM model 30. Listening to this, while watching a multi-Vortex Tornado video from Reed Timmer (silenced) - surreal.

[@LittleGibler]

This beats every other "reading you to sleep" ASMR video

[@MOONxCOOPER]

Keep coming back to this video. Favorite for falling asleep

[@dlwlrmae]

computer science student here. this video is greatly appreciated. thank you.

[@blanaobla]

Eventually I'm gonna be able to recite this book letter by letter from how much I listen to it

[@pimpslayer9109]

Rifts channel is a goldmine for content, crazy how many vids hes got i hope he gets good support from it

[@PerthfenceAu]

I think this is my favourite. Also wrote and article today about ASMR because not many people know about it and linked you in. You have been a lifesaver for my sleep. What surprised me was the ability to have a max partition of 2gd! That's pretty large for back in the day. I started my first lot of programming on a 486 running dos. Now I run Linux "Parrot" great GUI for general use and pen testing tools

[@Modernhabitus]

LET'S GO CHAMP ANOTHER ASMR BOOK READING LETSSSSSS DO THIS COPS

[@mattrader4910]

Holy! Almost feel like ER was reading from the bible... 'cept it's tech; ancient tech to me!

[@joaolopes4718]

This guy is a legend: He spended his time reading this boring but informative book, with a calm voice for us. We don´t deserve him.

[@Renzosocks]

how do you constantly know what kind of ASMR content your subscribers want before we even know we want them? amazing

[@Magodaparty]

I was going to sleep listening to this video but turns out i paid attention on the video so now i know how to use ms dos

[@infringinator]

I have the book of DONTS. Get it? Nevermind.

[@Kasai606]

Actually made me laugh.

[@MarielaPerez-no5mt]

You are a amazing Asmrtist and keep up the great work

[@Zethraxxur]

I hope you mean ASMR’tist’, would be weird if he was hating on them while being one ;)

[@MarielaPerez-no5mt]

@@Zethraxxur thank you for correcting me ❤️❤️

[@infernothegreat1041]

HOW HAVE I NOT SEEN THIS YET!?!? YES

[@emptycarrots4051]

Why is this the most relaxing thing I've seen all week

[@bunsenn5064]

This video persuaded me to buy a copy myself, I’ll be getting one soon.

[@joeharley1423]

Uncle E, this has made my day, thank you.

[@heapsmadgirl]

I've tried to read appliance manuals when I couldn't sleep. It usually works. This is a level up and even more effective 😜

[@meekoasmr9270]

Hahaha it's perfect, if it was too interesting I would want to stay awake to listen but this, just as uninteresting as you need to fall asleep ! Thank you ER n.n

[@asmrnirvana1428]

Had no clue what you were talking about but still very relaxing ❤️

[@steelwendigo6118]

The mechanicus approves of the holy scriptures. Keep up the good work brother.

[@bruhmiusmomentium1082]

This was my favorite book growing up

[@lilylolz2244]

Part 1 White Clouds Chapter 1: MS-DOS fundementals

[@channieswifeyyyyy]

This guy can meme the hell out of anything and I’m so down for it lmao

[@tlou2cinematicgameplay636]

MS-DOS manual for bed time story😄👌I just love your style

[@santiagoalonso1281]

this man uploads everything we need but we didnt ask for, genius, keep up with the good work

[@closetraccoon4913]

I was trying to fall asleep to this but I suprisingly found this too interesting to fall asleep to.

[@hoxseptem4073]

Hello there everyone, I'd really like to see a video on all of the Persons and objects of interest at Arkham Sanitarium- just a thought.

[@Fighting_Fatigue_117]

There would probably be a surge in resident patients at the moment.

[@hoxseptem4073]

@@Fighting_Fatigue_117 True that, are you a Lobster from the 4th dimension of darkness?