When The Narcissist Loses Control Over You

[@tdog9150]

I didn’t have a bad childhood , I had a great childhood , I never realized their was people like this existed ,, I can’t believe people are like this , but they do , oh how they do

[@joanolisa1]

Tell me about it. I read it in books, but experiencing it is an entire life changing process. They will shock your entire system.

[@kyki8512]

I feel the same way! When Jesus showed me that narcissist exist, I was so hurt and annoyed! I have always had a lot of compassion for people who were spiritually poor BUT when I started to come across narcissist I had to pray hard because I was TOO DISGUSTED with them to be as compassionate as I usually am! At first it made me feel like a bad Christian until I learned otherwise! I had never felt like this about anyone else no matter how bad they are EXCEPT NARCISSIST! They're spirits and behavior are just that horrible!

[@donnaogorman4935]

My childhood was like yours ..... Thought there really something wrong with me. I had never experienced a narcissist in my life. If I did I guess my radar was up without knowing it. I am fine after 2 years of having no contact. Hang in there people. Good days ahead

[@sarinascates5132]

Meet my husband. I am pretty sure he is infected by a demon, if not the devil himself. God pulled the wool off my eyes.

[@Liane-qs6ml]

I totally agree. I never knew either he hacked my phone, took my job away from me.

[@rambultruesdell3412]

Some people want and need for everyone to be as empty and miserable as themselves.

[@thetruther954]

Yes, and those “some people” should be showing their faces. It would be good for your wife. Don’t talk about her.

[@redsquirrel1086]

Always remember that you are dealing with a young child, between about 4 and 8 years old, in an adult's body.

[@brentgurney1308]

I believe it's more a 6 month old to a 2 year old who is able to speak in an adult body. From my experience dealing with these people I believe the self love is formed at very young age in development from there the emotional growth is diverted to the monster society is left to deal with it as the person grows.... The baby who was left to cry and not picked up over and over and over again

[@diojeidic.8272]

My child is 7. NEVERRRRRR has behaved in such way

[@narcissism-masterclass]

The narcissist experience can brew in your mind endlessly IF YOU LET IT.

[@lauralittle6899]

That's what is happening to me now!! I've lost a lot of sleep 😢😮

[@TrishaJohnson-ox1ry]

Yes; indeed; amen!

[@Linkfan007]

Yeah I agree, maybe he was in my life to teach me to be stronger and not to give myself up and give up everything for one person. To not be so trusting and giving? To not be so naive and to be brave enough to protect myself and walk away if I have a gut feeling that something isnt right.

[@daljitvirdi1024]

Thanks Anoushka I found myself crying at the end of your video because i still can't believe I've gone through this where they are extremely nice in the beginning.... only to disappoint me when they show their true colours! 😊😢💖😇💫⭐⚖️✌️☮️💞☯️💞🙏.

[@hibbertsh]

I do believe there was a reason why this person entered our lives. Believe me it was an agonizing lesson to learn.

[@edgreen8140]

When they say " your tge worst person" its a projection. They are jealous envious of you. You have things they don't have. Envy, entitlement- they should have these traits or material possesions. They showed you your triggers and you have more emotional intellect than they will ever have. If you have a talent they devalue it. We need to protect ourselves and do the work. You learn to see the manipulations. Its painful but your growing learning. Watch them move the goal post and deflect. They love if they can irritate you.

[@michaeljackson7361]

I believe this is the best post I've came across and I've seen thousands. Like she said I did nothing to deserve the treatment. I'm not co dependent like everyone else says. Listen to this lady. She's telling u the facts.

[@jrandallgilmore8907]

I NEEDED to be reminded of this. I thought I was healing and moving on, then he tried to come back yet again two months ago and I didn’t respond, but now for some reason I’m thinking of him constantly and secretly missing him. I’m afraid I’m going to manifest him back. Trying to remind myself all the crap and lies he put me through and his constant lying and games. Trying to remember all the lessons I’ve learned and the pain I’ve endured. He’s nothing but toxicity, lies and manipulation. Why TF am I thinking about him so much again? I thought I’d moved on and was healing.

[@bodiesandsouls]

I had an alcoholic father that died from it when I was a kid and was abandoned by my mom for two years. My narc ex trauma bonded with me over this as she was an adoptee. First few months amazing. Last few months destroyed me. I’m so thankful I found you and dr Armani because you’ve helped me realize this person was u like anyone id ever experienced before. So happy I can finally be at peace with everything she did to me. It wasn’t my fault.

[@mariaboakes1829]

Love this video, really needed to hear this today ❤

[@afol4016]

Anoushka, Thank you. What you do is So Important. I really Can't thank you enough. Narcs have Literally Destroyed Me and My Whole Life. But, I am not Dead Yet. I will rebuild My Life.

[@lankankeys8310]

One of the main reasons is the lack of boundaries. It's not about who we keep out but who we let in. Strong boundaries mean healthier relationships.

[@Vegan4life555]

I think it’s quite simple and I agree that they target anyone irrelevant of their background when they realise you are transparent. Once we initially witness that Jekyll and Hyde behaviour , when nothing seemingly has an significance as to why. It’s at that initial point that it seems so incredulous to us that we are completely gobsmacked , totally confused and try to fathom out where this inconceivable behaviour came from. As we spend further time with them they then seem to be on a level again, agreeable and pleasant. This now seems so uplifting , the good connection is back , then suddenly they disengage into some malignant energy again . The whole process initially is subtle , over more time the predictable behaviour comes into play far more frequently . It’s surreal, and seems unbelievably crazy, whilst toying brutally on a far more regular basis with your emotions . It truly is a carousel of insidious behaviour at the highest level , for no apparent reason . They need to use you at their own convenience there is no other reason. These toxic people are complete users! When they tell you they don’t care, please believe them because that’s the only truth they will ever give you. Sent from Manchester UK

[@hannahhughes4801]

Great comment, describes my wasted 30years with him.

[@lebensart3948]

They play with your emotions to cause cognitive dissonance, also called as narcissistic fog and to activate your nervous system which is your survival system. They create in us with the hot and cold game high levels of emotion which are created in our body by hormones. Adrenalin, Cortisol for punishment (narcissists devaluation) and Dopamin (narcissists love bombing). These feelings can lead to addiction (codependency) because they can eventually activate our childhood trauma of parental neglect. It is very cruel and they know, what they are doing.

[@stylist62]

This is exactly on point🥰

[@vijayarao4809]

I was brought up without a mother in a loving humble family..when the marriage was fixed, the love bombing phase was phenomenal, my MIL woild treat me so nicely, and after the marriage, extreme abuse, manipulation, silent treatment, neglect, isolation from my friends and parents, a roller coaster ride started.. Never ever knew about Narcissism until my Narcissistic MIL died.. I could connect the dots now and wonder how i survived the relationship for 27 years with her.. God was always with me guiding me through instincts and gut feelings..

[@jasminekujala4086]

Wow it's like ypur speaking directly to me ... Thank you ❤❤ your videos are getting me through this

[@Liane-qs6ml]

I have 2 very good friends who had horrible things happen to them they didn't turn out like these idiots. They know exactly what there doing

[@saulescamilla3605]

Yeah they do. I didn’t think about it till the relationship was over and she pretty much admitted that she wanted to “burn a hole in my heart” and the relationship ended horribly. Once I took some time to myself and reflect on the relationship is when I found out everything they did was premeditated. To the slightest argument to driving off somewhere mad, to “giving” me gifts or things I liked, everything was a lie and only for them to gain something. Nothing was from the heart or spontaneous.

[@basicinfo2022]

The difference is that the narc enjoys causing others pain and hurt.

[@Liane-qs6ml]

He even took my job. I'm going to be homeless

[@Joe-hf3cn]

Your deep dive in this video focusing on the victims of toxic personalities & how they possibly ended up being victimized may be one of your most powerful, insightful glimpses into the rationale for innocent people falling into the sway of predator personalities. Speaking to the possibility of a spiritual karmic influence could help add a layer of understanding, yet, one must be careful when treading on such grounds because bad things happen to good people. So, karma serving as a universal justice sends the message that whatever happened is deserved. That’s tricky ground. But I digress. As you may probably know as I’ve commented on your platform more than a couple times that I don’t always agree with your thoughts. Though, I gotta tell you, this one resonated to my heart & soul. Thank you for sharing your keen insights & passion to an extremely emotional, sensitive & important matter of narcissistic abuse

[@honestpainter]

We talked about how our relationship goes kinda quickly well when you’re over 60 years old, you don’t have a lot of time. I get taking your time when you’re in 20s and 30s but when you’re 60 - 65 years old, if someone doesn’t want to get it together right away, then forget it.

[@Anthony-e1t]

Thanks for the video, always some good points and very enlightening. Mine is complicated to start writing about. Thanks.

[@shirleychandler2780]

I’ve known all along there’s nothing wrong with me so after the cruelest discard what do I do with all the anger and bitterness?

[@ΜΑΡΙΑΠΑΠΑΔΟΠΟΥΛΟΥ-π7ω]

Same here I feel you

[@artbygilik]

They are the worst. It’s mind boggling that someone can invest so many years in someone or let them invest years and then disappear without a trace just like that

[@andreiadenie1158]

Hi! I am Andreia and in my case was a trauma Based relation(i believe in karma ,too)my parents ,both traumatised(Narc father..pasive agresive mum)…their marriage was a hell and yes I attract ,I entered a similar dynamic… There are No coincidences

[@jeanettecusic9430]

This is a very eye opening video. Explains a lot about ourselves and why. Thank you.

[@arianasha]

Thank you so much, Anoushka!

[@bryanwhitehouse4141]

Hi Anoushka. What I can't understand is, don't other people realize that I am being subjected to so much abuse? Do other people think that I deserve to be ridiculed? That would be hard to accept.

[@jasonfitzpatrick414]

You won't believe this, but I saw her in a dream forty years ago. Then, nine years ago, I met her. There was no attraction at that time. Now, I work with her, and she drives me crazy, or she did. She tried to use me the other day to give her energy because she was bored. I gave her a little attention, and she teased me about something. It was strange because she usually would hang out with her friends at work and ignore me. But, I just ignored her for the most part. I'm not sure why we met, and I'm trying to figure it out. She has gotten better, though. She has had a tough year. I hope she heals somehow because I know inside is a beautiful woman. Thanks for the video. I truly love this woman and want her better.

[@afol4016]

Yes. No One Warned Us! My life, or what is left of it, after The Narc, would have been a normal, love filled, Good life, if only I Knew What To Call It! It's too late for me, but I am Not Giving Up on Myself.

[@collincassady01]

Great Video !

[@Benita438]

❤❤thank you for your great videos thier very helpful and your very pretty

[@KL-zg7lu]

Didn't knock my self esteem, I only thought that he was mentally ill and insecure.

[@GuitarMatt]

Say it! They are indeed not as brilliant as they pretend to be

[@GeorgianaBagnasco]

I did take my time to get to know him, he was in my life for two years before I let him in, I never saw anything, but goodness in him, not just with me, but with even mutual friends that we shared, and he was one of my late husband’s best friends

[@unknownentrappment_ed3522]

Thanks Anoushka. I share with you. I read the book I received as a gift.

[@unknownentrappment_ed3522]

Interesting read afew days ago.

[@deezgex]

And alot of the terms about narcissist she used in expressions and saying about us, karmic, we mirror each other, soul ties, twins, flames, eternal husband etc etc. Lots of odd terms used early on over the top.

[@updates770]

I have given her everything. Yet I was firm and didn't dance to anything simply..she still left I mean after being so happy..but your videos are helping me put two and two together ❤

[@lancehilt7536]

A simpler explanation is that those with NPD are fearful of being vulnerable enough to be in an intimate relationship. They have been hurt in early childhood by the caregivers and, reasonably, are mistrustful. Nevertheless, like all of us they crave intimacy. Therefore they look for individuals who they see as kind, caring and trustful. No need to posit metaphysical origins or demonize them as calculated predators.

[@tdog9150]

I think an empathetic person is put in a narcissistic life for punishment , they will never beat an empathetic person , and they will always look for the empath in everyone and never find it , my X will not to be able to see a Boat without thinking of me , I made her coffee ever day I was with her , all the simple things in life , she will see me , but me , I miss the person that I thought she was , but I don’t see nothing she did for me ,, but one thing is for sure ,, if yu get sick , or in my case , a very bad sickness that requires radiation ,, they will ghost your tail in a Newyork minute ,, that’s what mine did ,, anyway ..

[@joanolisa1]

So sorry to hear that. Yes, they can’t stand it when you are sick. They will suck you dry like a leech. I met one, never knew they actually existed, but they really do. They are so sad.

[@ΜΑΡΙΑΠΑΠΑΔΟΠΟΥΛΟΥ-π7ω]

Sending you my love❤ from Greece although I don't know you (I know what you mean, same here)

[@rogerwhoareyou]

But what did the empathetic person do to deserve such punishment as to be stuck with the narcissist. I mean, the empathetic person will receive most of the punishment. But what did they do wrong? And of course, in your case and mine, when we get seriously sick, the narcissist discards us. We spend our lives trying to help them, we get abused, we get sick from it and then, they leave for the next empathetic person they can find. The only one that really seems to get punished is they empath. And for what? For being kind?

[@tdog9150]

@@rogerwhoareyou God has a plan , in the military the saying is. Service before self ,, we don’t have the answers , just the question ,

[@charlesdemar9612]

I made mine coffee,breakfast,tea every night,worked fulltime,kids,stayed super fit,told her i loved her and beautiful everyday,chopped wood in negative temps for her,paid every bill and bought her everything and travel last 9 years..she left me 6 months ago for a rich family,fighting for my kids..shes gonna lose..sorry to hear about your situation..hope it gets better.

[@anneyoung2310]

The narcissist never had control. I was with one, in marriage, and when he became abusive, I didn't tolerate it.

[@isabelleparise5607]

You are amazing to explain 🌼🌼🌷🌷🌸🌸🏵🏵

[@kumarayush4967]

Everybody has their own moral high ground. I found out that my ex has different morality, she used to justify her lies. For me in a relationship there is no room for lies. So never lose your moral high ground. Find a partner who thinks the same as you do. But it's difficult as narcissists are good at acting. So once you enter a relationship, observe, if the person's words are matching with their character or not... If not move away...

[@hannahhughes4801]

Thank you❤

[@sofialopez4763]

This is so true I have been with 1 n wonder why she was put in2 my life I didn't see the reg flag after 2 months ago n she texts me showing me quotes about what's going on in her life like everything was so perfect so it went down hill wasn't expecting this from her, but life is 2 short 2 try 2 make sense of all that happened

[@rikij05]

How do you know these things ? this is what happened to me 3 yrs 😢 ty.

[@1FantasticDreamBird]

I don't get how this video is about when the narcissist loses control of you. When you learn the lesson that you are empathetic, compassionate, full of life and they drain your spirit because of karma connection, when does the narcissist leave you alone? I've gray rocked him for years. He doesn't even talk to me. He goes to my daughter to talk. He shuts her bedroom door so I can't hear. If I come into the room, he whispers like everything is some big secret. I walk away. Who cares? It's all a lie coming from him.

[@steenkristensen6351]

Jeg forstår det udmærket og er enig med dig om det du siger. Ha en vidunderlig aften Anouska 🙂

[@etaokha4164]

I went no contact

[@ChristopherCook-ou7qo]

There are predators clear and simply. Imagine if we had all ended up with nice caring partners we wouldn’t be here now. We’d all still be in happy healthy relationships. Sure I saw some red flags in the beginning. It all seems that it was too good to be true. Kind caring people are easy marks for these sick soul sucking monsters. The last five years. Including post divorce were so horrific I developed cluster headaches, pre-diabetes, and a heart arrhythmia. Never again will I ever be so caring and trusting of someone I really don’t know. She was white trash through and through with no morals. She would lie, cheat, and steal, to get what she wanted once I was used up and discarded. It’s a terrible way to Learn a life lesson but a valuable lesson indeed. Never in my life did I think another human being could be so evil. I wish you all the best on your journey of self improvement and awareness!

[@Liane-qs6ml]

I think they should be locked in a room with no phone just there ridiculous thoughts in their head😮

[@anneyoung2310]

They would die without supply. They isolate the target and we get stronger and more particular about who we give our time to.

[@ΜΑΡΙΑΠΑΠΑΔΟΠΟΥΛΟΥ-π7ω]

Amazing suggestion !😂

[@BeachQueen6420]

I vetted my husband for 2 YEARS before I agreed to marry him. That is an frightening amount of control to hold your mask for years. Things didn’t change until after we had our first child, well into the 4th year of our “relationship “. Who could have seen that one coming?

[@thereallisa1]

I like your videos. Do you accept constructive criticism? Please refrain from taking 2 full minutes to promote your lives and another 4 min at end to push your programs. Just state a 10 second intro about ur lives and point to the info below. Your repeat listeners are your base and we suffer through the sales every single video and that is not necessary or kind. Thank you for your consideration.

[@Eire32]

Narc 😂

[@thereallisa1]

@@Eire32 the truth is not the definition of a narc. Sorry. Projection much?

[@ZZ-rg6li]

@@thereallisa1I agree she never comes on without a sales pitch never

[@SMorris-s4r]

Ditto

[@roddywilliams9957]

Do you offer 1/2 seasons?? Id like to talk with you before going into my divorce trial… ?? Its April 8th. Is this possible? Im pro-se.. last leg of the divorce..

[@Wordsarejustwords]

Gentle thought…maybe we could turn the into music down a smidge? 😮 (…EarPods…) 💓🙏🏼

[@Liane-qs6ml]

I'm so angry I can't help it

[@tdog9150]

That is start of second stage ,, 3 more stages to go .. normal at this point .

[@tdog9150]

If I had to guess, less then 3 months in .

[@hannahhughes4801]

Me too, ❤

[@MylesFalconer]

Really needed to hear this. Honestly never been so confused in my life, but thank god for Anoushka

[@cynthiarunge4858]

My mother was worst narcissist then I was surrounded my whole life

[@joncarson1765]

My girlfriend of 3 years has been physically abusive and mentally abusive. We just welcomed a beautiful baby and just 2 months into our new found family my girlfriend hit me while I was holding my daughter because I left a bottle of her breast milk out on accident. She promised she will never do it again, but I’ve Hurd this many times. Now I’m wondering if I should make a police report or will the abuse stop because we have a newborn or will it continue knowing we have a newborn. Can a narcissist change once having a child? I’m asking because I don’t want my daughter not to have a mother and I’m so confused on what to do. Thank you

[@ferdaspring82]

No they never chance they get worse trust me they will abuse Child too and you more and more 😢

[@joncarson1765]

@@ferdaspring82 😞Thank you, everyone I’ve talked to has said the same. I don’t know why I’m looking for more confirmation, I guess I’m hoping it’s not true, but with the knowledge I have been given from these videos and loved one I’ve decided to follow through with police report. Thank you

[@Bella-fg4nt]

💔😢

[@thetruther954]

Anoushka, with all of this hurt you are feeling? I think the problem I have with some women? I’m not naming names. But if I take this on. If I really listen? I would try and be a vessel at this point. This pain and suffering is not due to me. You are talking through me to the person who caused this. And there was a cause, it’s not something unspecific floating around in the air that no-one can deal with. So please, read that. My pain, my suffering as if it were you? Is not about you. There is no other way I can put it. It is the best way for us to get stuff of our chest without it blowing up in our face. But why Anoushka? Why on earth would you start to personalize this? You don’t get enough attention? You can’t hang in there when things start to get close? It’s your job to take the blame for some reason? Man, I got to get out of here. I must just break off for a while. My tears and anger are not meant for you. Jesus, would you kindly please stop that. It’s the right way to do this, guaranteed.

[@tonysfishkeeping537]

What you feel like doesn’t matter, where is the videos on just fact of the matters with these people. We all know what they are like if you have dealt with a narcissist. They can do no wrong, they can cheat on you and it’s because you cheat “so they say” but you actually never did

[@canofranistan6885]

You toob will not let me talk to you. I am going to take them to court.

[@DariusBazargan-eu1ik]

You are not saying anything.