Billy Crystal's Opening Monologue: 2004 Oscars

[@marymagdalene3004]

Can't believe he did not get a STANDING ovation! Sure deserved one - that was out of sight greatness and lots of talent!!!

[@Razor179100]

One of the most confident performers I've seen.

[@harshailapakurty]

Exactly

[@SurahOnline]

FACTS!!! 💯💯💯💯

[@SteveJobIess]

Got balls telling someone else not to sing.

[@anthonycannella8268]

@@harshailapakurty 7o7o⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶⁶

[@margiebailes5360]

Agree,

[@tomgebarowski8156]

Billy was the BEST!!! He put so much thought and charm into his annual opening song medley at each Oscar's. Legendary!!!

[@colleen4ever]

Let's see how well Conan does this year. Bound to be better than Jimmy Kimmel.

[@kittyblingbling]

We need him to host next year...pure class and professionalism!!!

[@lmnefg121]

damn right~！

[@JJ-ze6vb]

It’s not 1960 anymore. This was exactly the selfcentered, tone deaf way to play „old Hollywood“ that cost them a lot of viewers. He even pretends to „sing black“ in those last seconds there.

[@deanronson6331]

​@@JJ-ze6vb FYI, he was doing a Louie Armstrong impression. Before that, in the "Ol' Man River" segment, he pronounced "along" with a very soft "l", the way a Southern black person would, but none of the well-known black singers pronounced it that way when doing that song - strange. Do you resent Billy's doing Mohammad Ali impressions, for which he became famous and which Ali and his wife liked a lot? Nobody in their right mind can accuse Billy of racial insensitivity. His father was a jazz impresario in the 40's and 50's, and famous black musicians were always visiting his house while Billy was a kid. Billie Holiday would occasionally take him to the movies. He's been best friends with Karim Abdul Jabar since high school, he could call Ali a very good friend, and I'm sure very few blacks would resent him for occasional impressions of black celebrities. Should we reproach Eddie Murphy for doing some savage send-ups of James Brown or Stevie Wonder?

[@Carlos-xz3vi]

@@JJ-ze6vb Is better to have people getting slapped, mean spirited jokes, and unamusing hosts.

[@lylejames965]

@@Carlos-xz3vi mean spirited jokes? When?

[@JohnWesleyDowney]

I've watched this video many many times. It's some of the best live television I've ever seen. I'm struck by several things. The lyrics are brilliant, clever, funny and timely. Billy Crystal is at his absolute BEST. Not only did he have to SING and remember all those song lyrics, he looks ABSOLUTELY relaxed. That's amazing. A global audience of one billion people and pretty much every Hollywood celebrity and power player in the room and he just cruises through the whole things like it's nothing. Very few performers could pull this off. Kudos to Billy!

[@gilltim5711]

I agree with everything except the audience of 1 billion. I lived overseas for 15 years and can assure you, no one else in the world watches the Oscars. No one. It's a purely American thing. No one else gives a sh*t about the Academy Awards. It's like the World Series of baseball. No one in the world is concerned with it. Every year I hear them talk about the audience of billions overseas. It's all horse manure. No one outside of American has even the slightest concern about the Oscars, or watches them, or talks about them. It's all PR BS. Sorry, Hollywood, you're just a bunch of pretentious a-holes.

[@reubenism62]

@@gilltim5711 you havent heard of chinese and indian audience yet???

[@gilltim5711]

@@reubenism62 The Oscars are of no more interest to the Indians that the Bollywood awards are to Americans. Nor do they matter to the Chinese! Trust me, the people of China could not give a rats buttocks how American's win an American award. It's pure arrogance and marketing to believe the world watches this pathetic American vanity parade.

[@mrnocal]

@@gilltim5711 There have been many non-American nominees from non-American films and wins in various categories. Just off the top of my head...Sophia Loren in "Two Women" won. Roberto Benigni won for "Life Is Beautiful". Marion Cotillard won for "La Vie en Rose". Besides acting, there have been many other foreign films that have won Oscars besides the Best Foreign Film award. Just search on Wikipedia for "List of Academy Award-winning foreign-language films".

[@mrnocal]

I doubt the audience of a billion. How could they possibly measure that? But I do agree that Billy Crystal was one of the greatest hosts alongside Bob Hope and Johnny Carson.

[@rjkral]

Wow. They don’t make ‘em like this anymore!!! What really strikes me besides Crystal’s immense talent is how this presentation he provides just truly CELEBRATES the night and those being honored. You can just feel how everyone is thoroughly enjoying this!! Class act to say the least.

[@emmyelijah7395]

Absolutely beautiful performance. Billy is irreplaceable.

[@DailyCherish-rp8ng]

I love that he said most men Clint Eastwood's age are either dead or dying TWENTY years ago and Clint is STILL HERE! Long may Mr Eastwood live. So glad he's still with us.

[@matkodoris9099]

There were more than a few good hosts of the Oscars but Billy was quite special every time, arguably the best host ever.

[@grizzfan08]

+Matko Doris Amen to that!!! And quite frankly he does the best jokes.

[@howardkoor2796]

Loved his hosting

[@robertbarnes2205]

I agree

[@Omar-wz4ds]

I think Whoopi was a great host too

[@vivianamuntean146]

:) Would love to see Martin Short host.

[@Mintie365]

Daang, Billy is one true performer. All his monologues are so witty and entertaining!

[@adscorp2002]

Undoubtedly he is one of the best hosts for Oscars... till date. Always charming and full of good humour.

[@gmar7836]

No. He is the best

[@dotsanto3929]

No one can ever be as great as he was. Miss him

[@davidmarlajurek5038]

Best EVER!!!! Have been a Billy Crystal fan since I was in grade school and watched him in the sitcom “Soap”, then SNL. Wow, what a career and what talent! ♥️

[@pandorazbox9659]

The Best host, wish he still did it

[@PiCheZvara]

Damn, Depp was nominated for Pirates? I totally forgot about that. Deserved, its an iconic performance, but man, to be nominated for a Disney summer blockbuster...quite the feat.

[@keelahrose]

Easy to forget considering how far he's run the character into the ground by now.

[@katherynemero9355]

Actually, I think it was a sign that movies are becoming trash. If you can win for an idiotic summer film with no real point (except a huge budget, explosions, nudity, and billion dollar box office). This was the beginning of the downhill slide that the Oscars were doing. It's basically trash now. Trash winners are all that win.

[@steveconn]

They hand them to films like The Black Panther now. Not such a big deal.

[@matt_indy]

@@katherynemero9355 What a shit take lol. If anything it is going the complete opposite direction. Most nominations are for movies even film fans don’t watch. Micro budget gender benders.

[@PrettyXXEmpty]

@@steveconn tf

[@Casarzino]

my favorite opening monologue ever

[@abrahamd9126]

It must be a category to award the host of the oscars...so funny I love him on stage

[@launachtyr]

I have rewatched his performance over and over with my mom for years. We still quote some of the lines he does. Fantastic show!

[@gabrielcoronado6395]

No one, by far, has had the talent, charisma, gift and grace of Bilky Crystal at the Oscars. The guy is a genius!

[@Coconutcase90]

"Julie Andrews, I apologize in advance!" ... Billy starts singing ... I fall of my chair =)

[@marcocaneira]

I just can’t get tired of watching this guy, amazing Billy Crystal 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

[@freddyfaze25tiktok48]

❤️I love Billy, I never wanted to miss the opening of the OSCARS because of Billy. He is the best!!😂🤣

[@stanleyban]

God, Billy's a talent! What fun!

[@TheJewellian]

The days of talent and style, Crystal and the stars....now we have a slap!

[@Au60schild]

What a great opening to the show along with the preceding parodies of all the years movies with Billy Crystal inserted (see separate upload). He should be hosting every Oscar show. Funny, imaginative and talented, he's just perfect!

[@xoxLettermanxox]

BRING BILLY BACK!!!!

[@davidsoave9287]

Christine Muresan I

[@philsarkol6443]

He has got everything a presenter should have...funny, witt, smart and he is not afraid to do his sing and dance routine on his own. He does all this without sarcasm, or any danger of insulting someone , just poke a joke! In my book these are the best openimgs for the Oscars. Billy Christal a pure talent!!

[@jaynehaught9715]

I love you Billy...I can't stop smiling....❤️😇

[@ItzMeOB]

The best Oscar host ever....I could watch this again and again. Will never get tired of it. Where is he , by the way? Is he going to host the next Oscar again? Hopefully?!

[@jillspady6450]

No One does it better!!!! Way to Billy - I never tire of these.

[@MeMadSlightly]

this is the very first Oscar night I had seen, and I have been so amazed by this one, that all the others have never entertained me as much as this did. He is awesome! Sorry for my English, I'm Italian!

[@dropkickmurphy4114]

Your English is terrific! Better than many Americans'.

[@gemmab8626]

I’m at the Clint Eastwood part, and I’m crying with laughter. 😂 Omg I love Billy so much.

[@tonyanastasio6959]

Watched Billy since I was kid hosting the Oscars...the best ever...the greatest host of every award show...love him hosting...he makes it feel like a wonderland. Couldn't give a shit about all the others. Billy you rock!

[@catherinemagee5327]

1 of the most talented & humble!

[@stitchedreams]

I've lost count how many times I have watched this, along with the clip at the beginning. Awesome stuff.

[@joe-vz6hx]

absolutely the best Oscar host ever and second isn't even close. so great at having an appreciation for the tradition and the movies overall but meshes it perfectly with his humor. he was the only reason frankly that I watched as long as I did. haven't watched or cared since

[@RDSports5]

The incomparable Billy Crystal. What a talent... Thank you Billy!!

[@paulseidl4335]

Unbelievable skill at the most important Hollywood event of the year...A master Oscar host! Super talented and, ought to receive an honorary award for emceeing in front of all the critics, actors, directors, producers, etc. He knows his lines, comedic anecdotes and jabs at the nominees...that's entertainment and worthy of international broadcast!

[@merrylmarsh9037]

The BRILLIANT Billy. What energy!!!! And a wonderful, cheeky delivery.🤣

[@eloyf.192]

One of my all time favorite Oscars opening 😍

[@jgarin07]

Thank you uploading ALL of his hilarious openings! Looking forward to him in 2012!

[@danahoward759]

I just love him. His humor is so on point...I wonder how many Oscar's get hosted

[@redskywalker3374]

more sense of humor ..yes .. less violence & no one hollering fudge for fame🤣

[@yaldashams3978]

The best host ever . Love you man I wish you do it one more time

[@philsarkol341]

to me the best host ever..a treat to hear him sing in that tradition of variety musical song&dance routine as a way to present the films and actors nominated. pure talent and comical physical pressence..the best!!

[@nathelondon3719]

Billy Crystal, unprecedented, unique, unparalleled. Hard act to follow....

[@AdelaideAtAMasquerade]

Billy Crystal's song about LOTR just did it for me!!!! XD

[@grizzfan08]

+Adélaïde Naiyaleen At least he apologized in advance.

[@manuelorozco7760]

At least it was necessary for him to do so to Julie Andrews. But she wasn't the first to sing those soaring and timeless songs. The first Maria in the Sound of Music on Broadway was Mary Martin. 6 years later of course was when Ms. Andrews herself had that pleasure of being Maria. Just after she won her Oscar for Mary Poppins.

[@dabearcub]

Better than those shitty movies.

[@andyigwe7119]

Billy Crystals hosting is out of this world. Imagine doing a confident flawless one man performance in front of the biggest celebrities in the world all dressed to kill in one location

[@stevetaylor1412]

One of the best if not the best and most entertaining Oscar presenter of all time.

[@ralphfiligenzi8714]

What a funny and talented guy Billy Crystal is. There will never be another Billy Crystal.

[@DragonNomak]

0:13 R.I.P Heath Ledger

[@broadwaymike92]

Just saw him last night on Broadway in Mr. Saturday Night!!! A true top notch comedic master class experience to never forget. Billy is my comedic idol!!!

[@vamanosninja4143]

The Oscars are Billy Crystal's talk show. He's hosted so much. :)

[@lorrainesekera4100]

This is his best of all time!

[@aquariusbrat]

Not gonna lie this was probably one of the best Oscar ceremonies. A) Because Billy Crystal hosted and B) The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (My favourite movie) won all 11 awards :D

[@jazzdub4958]

Awesome night.

[@kohatenclave]

Billy sings dances, moves around and jokes in perfect rhythm. Can there be a better Oscar host? ,

[@ghostrider-ek8gu]

Billy Crystal One of the Very Best!

[@barbarasquyres9563]

He is the best Oscar host ever!!!!!!

[@redskywalker3374]

Steve is running up aside him

[@citizen1163]

LOVE Billy Crystal & what a buzz it must've been singing those songs with that amazing orchestra!

[@zeekerram7892]

Billy Crystal . . .still the best Oscar host in my life time at least. . .

[@maridepp53]

zeek erram He really is the best all around entertainer which is perfect for this job... and can carry a tune to boot!

[@nanasshi0711]

"TLOTR 11 noms, one for each ending" i lost it there😂

[@sandraevans4082]

love this man, funny, sing, dance, no fear just entertaining

[@debymonk]

Billy Crystal, what a showman! ❤️

[@ronchu4453]

so much talent. Billy Crystal.

[@pwhit59]

Billy was such a great entertainer.

[@ThomasPBlack]

This is brilliance, genuine entertainment brilliance. The amount of thought, memory and entertainment savvy that it required to deliver this with class and enjoyment can only be delivered by a entertainment genius like Billy Crystal. What a golden era performance. Zero profanity. Zero insults that were the cause for discomfort ... positive energy all the way. I'm rarely impressed by Hollywood!!

[@ginal2643]

SO enjoyable! A titan of comedy for me and my family, for all of us.

[@talibe801]

tons of talent!the best ever.

[@sueraiders]

Billy crystal was the best MC ever for the Academy Awards. He could probably do it today and do a fantastic job!!!!👍👍

[@sammysouth8372]

billy will never be topped.

[@PeanutsAssorted]

Ahh Billy, easily the best host the Oscars ever had... they need to start just handing him truckloads of money so he'll keep doing it

[@PixelPigu]

+Lee GaryB I dunno, Seth MacFarlane is pretty great too.

[@PeanutsAssorted]

PixelPigu Oh he was pretty great don't get me wrong, but there's a reason that Billy was doing it as long as he did.

[@colleen4ever]

+PixelPigu HELL NO, he was one of the worst!

[@kcmn0089]

We're obviously not seeing the same thing

[@colleen4ever]

Obviously. McFairlane is one of the most evil people alive!

[@lolla909]

best oscar host ever!

[@GinnyFrings2]

Billy Crystal, the unbeatable...!

[@johnsullivan1899]

In addition to all the other well-deserved praise, Billy’s singing range and timbre are terrific! “Old Man River” and “Maria” and “Goldfinger” are multi-octave testers that demand a strong voice. “My Favorite Things” and “Come Fly With Me” have their moments too. Way to go Billy!

[@g_aldrich_]

I miss Billy hosting the oscars. He's my personal best host 😭🤌🏻

[@mkouadri1573]

i miss this guy so gifted so naturel we love you billy.

[@hyacinthalcarazvillanueva7979]

always brilliant!

[@markjardenil]

Cmon guys that is a standing ovation performance of Mr Crystal.

[@allisoncroft3143]

The best host ever .................................

[@aliasblair]

What a wonderful talent.

[@mojo500100]

Arguably the best Oscar host-expert delivery, no wandering off into controversy and dwelling on politics-stick to the material, and delight the audience.

[@AtiriaB]

Billy Cristal's monologue's classy, funny and most importantly have no use of those pejorative jokes, making everybody uncomfortable. This one reminds me of Hollywood of the Golden Times. Good job.

[@NaturaBreeze]

+lobona arcoiris Yeah the uncomfortable jokes are BAD...no one likes them...not funny and not classy

[@AtiriaB]

***** Well, as I said, I like it.

[@colleen4ever]

Are ya listening Jimmy Fallon, and Kimmel?!

[@_fogell]

You don’t think Scarlett was uncomfortable when Billy mentioned her ass?

[@harsimaja9517]

Scarlett Johansson's behind and Clint Eastwood's similar age to people 'dead or dying'?

[@alessandrorossini8704]

Billy is one of a kind...👍🏼👍🏼💪🏼💪🏼

[@shektarafdar7496]

Billy Crystal is the Best Oscars Host.

[@mimimorales6999]

The only and only…Billy Crystal!!!❤😅Brilliantly entertaining as always.

[@MikeMusicandMotivation]

Billy is the Best and always will be

[@paoerfulone1089]

I shall forever address this Awards show as "The Lord of the Rings Appreciation Show."

[@abhy301]

sound of music was lovely

[@manuelorozco7760]

Yes but Lady Gaga did it better

[@rafaelgomez1989]

BILLY CRYSTAL is the BEST OSCAR'S HOST ever = CLASSY, FUNNY FUNNY, ARTICULATE, INTELIGENT HUMOR, TALENTED VERY TALENTED !!!!

[@Mattyhull1]

He should host every Oscar cermony from now on!!!

[@cliftonboyz1959]

The indomnitable Sir William Crystal......when all around in the world is going to sh-t, I find comfort in Billy's performances.

[@vpal2998]

Wow! What a talent! Bravo! 👏👏👏

[@DD-sw1dd]

“Theirs no better way to celebrate a recession that to have a bunch of millionaires celebrate giving themselves an award for being ‘best pretender’” Bill Crystal

[@nikhilsharma4716]

Wow Westside Story theme always makes me tear up!

[@laytonjones2093]

The all time greatest Oscar host ever

[@ryanklinker]

Was anybody else impressed by Billy hitting the high note at 9:04?

[@MrGaryGG48]

Billy isn't ever gonna be a great singer but he's one hell of an entertainer!!! His intonation tends to wander all over the scale but no one cares, he's funny, he can cram more lyrics into 2 minutes than anyone else in the house, and he is just enjoyable without fail!! He is one excellent entertainer... that's all!

[@DavidLorellHoskins]

@@MrGaryGG48 👍

[@aminaaaamina8428]

ooh my heart nealy stoped when I saw Heath :(( You were a great actor. R.I.P.

[@Raine_Raine]

Damn, I so wish Robin Williams hosted The Oscars...at least once

[@CaptainKleptan]

He did

[@maridepp53]

Raine_Raine: I loved Robin but not sure he'd have been a good choice for this, wonder if he could keep control of himself.

[@bjlyon615]

Raine It would have never ended!

[@frank2778]

@Tom Sawyer Goldfinger; Bond Soundtrack.

[@one2teen]

The year Out of Africa won it was co-hosted by Alan Alda, Jane Fonda and Robin Williams.

[@jazzdub4958]

Billy Crystal's last truly great Oscar Night monologue as host. There's been legendary hosts of past decades but Billy gets my vote as the greatest of all time.

[@johlayson]

I'm imagining Mike Wazowski hosting the Oscars. Hahahaha.

[@manuelorozco7760]

Happy 15th anniversary to Monsters Inc.

[@prestonsalexanderstudios]

Roz in the crowd would be so proud of him!

[@jokermann01]

"Most men your age are either dead or dying"-no wonder Eastwood made that joke about just being a kid when he won an Oscar the next year.

[@Casarzino]

and 12 years later he's still showing no signs of quitting

[@tarunverma1431]

Love the graciousness with which Clint took it. Classy human

[@ayosilva]

@@tarunverma1431 yes!

[@colleen4ever]

Can't get away with saying THAT to too many "stars" nowadays.

[@tugboat2030]

​@@tarunverma1431 Only Billy could have done that to Clint in 2004. He would have swatted Jack Black with the back of his hand.