Birth QandA

You guys have asked a ton of questions about our last surrogacy delivery so we wanted to answer a few of those to hopefully clear the air! Love you guys tons. Thanks for being here!
DAN AND SAM
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Hey there, I'm Sam. My husband Dan and I have two kids, Canyon and Ember. In 2018 we felt led to pursue surrogacy and we are now in our second journey. We hope to encourage and inspire you with all we do!
Editing by: Crema Video
#surrogacy #surrogacyjourney #surrogate #gestationalcarrier #gestationalsurrogacy

[@Meagan.Jones2024]

I love how you put your thoughts aside and focused on what Jake and Kenzy desires and how they felt.

[@brittniwilliams4826]

As someone who has worked in L&D and NICU for almost 20 years… yes! The lower back pain is from the epidural. The scar tissue is pulling and trying to break apart so there is a little knot that’s basically trying to reabsorb. I also have four c sections and know exactly what you’re talking about. It usually lasts a couple weeks. Heat and massage help a TON! :)

[@stephanieann622]

I swear you have angel wings on your back. What you’ve done for less fortunate families is simply incredible. I can’t imagine wanting babies and it not happening for some. Congratulations on your latest journey and God’s blessings on you and your family 😇🙏

[@jamiesmith2609]

Sam every time you speak about this you just glow !!! I think we all feel your love. ❤❤❤

[@courtneybreault5263]

I feel your nervousness about delivery was because of the bond you have with Kenzy & Jake. You wanted everything to run smoothly for them. You were EXTREMELY close to them from the start. I hope you will always be by their side as Baby girl❤ Aunty's Sam. Thank you for sharing the whole story.❤❤❤❤❤

[@jid3479]

Thank you for sharing your journey. I listen to how positive and open you are. Your consideration is inspiring I’m so pleased everything went well and what a gift you were able to give to a precious family. Take care in your recovery ❤

[@BobbieJoKlug]

I'm sure you've heard this before, but I'm so proud of you Sam! What a wonderful journey to allow us all to be a part of! Thank you for being so open and vulnerable, let alone being an Angel from God to literally change people's lives, so they can become a parent! Very special to watch you become so close with Jake and Kenzy throughout this process!! Again.... thank you! P.S. I've had 4 children myself, and only one labor and delivery I had an epidural.... I agree, it was amazing! I felt like I didn't even birth a baby, until obviously when it was healing time.

[@1sweetmess]

I swear epidurals cause back pain after birth. The doctors and nurses told me its not from an epidural, but everyone I've known has had that same experience. My back felt like it was breaking in half that first day.

[@-nellie-m3711]

Sam, I’ve said it so many times since I found your channel, You and Dan are Very Special Kind Of Special People, putting the intended parents before yourself is Even More Special Kind of Special in my Heart ❤️, I can imagine how Kenzi and Jake are Feeling Right At This Moment, holding their Precious Baby Girl and finally being able to be parents, I have learnt so much throughout your journey that I never knew before about surrogacy, giving the Gift Of Life Is A Blessing, You and Dan are a Blessing to those couples who are Now Parents To Their Own Child. Thank You for sharing your journey here on KZbin. Keep Healing Well and I’m sure Dan will rub your back for You. Blessings from Australia 💙💙🩷🩷 and I must add that I Respect the Parents of Baby Girl To Keep Her Off The Internet and any social media platforms that involve You and Dan, it’s their baby girl. 🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@anitavandermerwe7797]

You are so awesome not just for this journey but your whole attitude is uplifting and so caring and so much love for everyone ❤❤ 🇿🇦

[@brandyhardin5045]

Epidural back is forever. It’s something about the epidural that just makes your back hurt like that for always.

[@camarogirl1369]

I delivered both my babies being induced with no pain meds or epidural. Everyone is different. When I worked in a surgical center we used to mix alcohol and essential oils for nausea. Works wonders! Thank you for sharing your beautiful journey, you’re truly amazing!!

[@Crystalc8683]

It’s amazing how you blessed them with a beautiful baby girl❤❤

[@lornafletcher6174]

Hi, just wanted to say congrats to Jake and Kenzy on the birth of their little girl. Also well done to Sam and Dan. In terms of epidural and back pain after, i had the same problem with my little girl's birth. The back pain was something else. I found putting something behind you when you sit and also one of those donut pillows for down below. Plenty painkillers and moving around helped. Also maybe cool gel packs?

[@tinamccormick4679]

This is so informative. Thank you for being open and sharing. Sam your blessed.

[@daniadeane2519]

Maybe because of the depth of your relationship with Jake and Kenzy amped up the nerves! This story is so awesome!!! ❤

[@simplydivinewithleahdeane549]

I've had Pitocen with 2 of my 4 deliveries...I Labored quickly with every delivery tho. My 1st was 6 hours (with Pitocen) my 2nd was 4hrs (without pitocen), 3rd was 2 hrs (no Pitocen), 4th was 4 hrs (with pitocen)...but I had no epidural or pain meds with any of then. I love hearing all birth stories, all babies are miracles.

[@baylor.elizabeth.12]

congratulations! you helped another family and that’s all that matters. you are a very kind, and generous person to do that for someone! your amazing! and i know it may be hard for ur kids but they will understand soon. i love ur channel and i’m subscribed! lovee you alll! ur amazing!!❤🎉😊

[@abbytravers2306]

Im a surrogate and I nursed baby the whole time in the hospital 💙 for me it wasn’t a bonding thing and It was just easier for me than pumping freshly postpartum 😊

[@torischwartz745]

I think that’s the easiest also it’s so beneficial also for the breast milk to come in

[@Juli-wu5nv]

Still not getting it, why still so many women lay on their backs, pushing the babys out against gravity. It just doesn't make sense at all.. After my first baby I thought I could never ever do this on my knees, after a 20+ hour birth, wirh epidural, pitocin, long pushing, nurses helping push baby out, tearing like crazy... . but here I am, 5 babys later- all born on my knees, without any kind of medication. 2 - 3 pushes, no tears, one baby even breech- the fastest delivery by the way- My advice.. try not to lay down. Walk through your pauses, squat down in contractions, let your partner help you through- you can have a very peaceful, still painful but same time great birth experience! And for sure ALL medical intervinents effects you AND Baby! Also epidural. Don't research just main medical pages, consider critical thinking doctors as well.

[@Aplrjybfkwlsbc]

I know exactly what you mean about the mental load of wanting everything to go well. It was so much to carry. Of course when I was trying to talk about it in the moment I would cry 🙄 gosh that's the worst. Thankfully everything worked out and seeing my IPs meet their baby was worth everything! Seeing big sister and IPs all together has meant everything to me. I wish I could do this 100 times lol

[@ashattack99]

20:10 I’ve never had an epidural but I’ve had a lumbar puncture and it does in fact cause soreness in your back, I would recommend, personal experience, that you don’t use a massage gun in that area and just do the best you can to let it heal. Edit after reading other comments: I fully healed and have no lingering sensitivity or pain BUT my provider was very honest and upfront that I would have pain and that I shouldn’t be lifting more than 10lbs, I can’t remember exactly, but I think for a week. I would say a lumbar puncture would be easier on the body than an epidural and it seems providers aren’t giving the same warnings.

[@courtthelover12]

For my experience they always deny the back pain is from epidural but had 1 healthcare professional admit. Theirs something going into your spinal column of COURSE it's going to have long term effects. Def. irritating that it's something they try to deny but knowing your body and that somethings not right since, almost makes you feel like your making it up and feel dismissed.

[@KelseyMc6]

My first child I had an epidural and they messed it up and hit the wrong spot. It’s 12 years later and I have chronic back pain (horrible back issues) and psoriatic arthritis. I have no doubt that it is what caused my issues, but they will never admit it. Now I’m 34 with severe arthritis, my body is literally like a 60 year olds. I went on to have another epidural 8 years later and it failed. Then a spinal with my c section, 17 months later, and they hit the same spot that they did the first epidural. So I’m set for life with chronic pain and severe issues, from the first epidural.

[@courtthelover12]

@KelseyMc6 I am so sorry! With my first, the epidural worked, but I had chronic back pain for the first few months after having my son. Thankfully I could go to therapy bc his NICU stay hit insurance max for family so insurance covered therapy 100% for the rest of the year. With my 2nd child I refused to get epidural, the moment I found out I was pregnant I mentally prepared for a med free birth. It was a better recovery for sure. the birth pain didn't last near as long as the post epidural pain.

[@KelseyMc6]

@@courtthelover12 I am glad that you got to go to therapy on insurances dime and are not still suffering with it! It’s awful. How long was your baby in the Nicu? We had twins in 2021, 26 weekers and spent 96 days there. It is incredibly expensive, so I’m sure you maxed out quick 😆

[@courtthelover12]

@KelseyMc6 He was only in there for 1 week! the total bill was 45k but insurance maxed and we paid max of 8k for NICU and my labor as that was the family maximum. My friend had twins the same year as my first in 2019, 3 months later and was closer to your bill per kid! and same it's wild but happy I was able to take advantage! unfortunately, that was 2019, had my 2nd in 2021, then in winter of 2022 just before Christmas I hurt my back at work (CNA, while caring for combative resident) so I do still struggle with chronic back pain just for different reason. 😢

[@mommy3078]

The sight where my epidural went in is very sensitive still and my baby is 5 years old! I heard it’s common for the spot to be tender/sensitive

[@IngridAnsarie-s8v]

Greetings precious people from South Africa ❤

[@marciacarson6688]

Oh my goodness I know you said yall don’t want anymore kiddos they yall are content with yalls 2 but oh my goodness seeing the kids with a sibling would be sooooooo ADORABLE 😍❤️

[@StephyRae83]

The lower back pain is a result of the epidural, I had the same thing happen, and I actually did bruise pretty bad also.

[@angelalane2350]

I tore more with an epidural 😓 my second birth was unmedicated aside from a small amount of pitocin and despite the contractions being MUCH worse the actual birth was amazing. I could feel and stop if I was pushing to much :)

[@AlexaJaeger-ti5cw]

Do u plan to have a 3rd surrogacy baby later on down the road? U guys are literally a blessing, blessing these families with their beautiful babies! ❤

[@barbarahoover3941]

Thank you for this video. Amazing woman Sam ❤

[@Kimbeltran925]

I just gotta say you are amazing for doing all this🫶🏻

[@yahariamaro2640]

I’ve been waiting for this 😊❤️

[@crystaltaylor7325]

Sam and Dan, you two are such a blessing 🙌 to this world 🌎 thank you for being the people you are ❤ you are a miracle to so many people. My God bless 🙌 🙏 you and your family each and every day ❤

[@amberbomek4012]

I've heard that women can go through hormone therapy to be able to produce their own milk. I think that's cool, because I know the bond that those hormones can form 💕

[@teespencer725]

I've had 3 daughters and all my daughters were born under 40 minutes from start to finish they were all born with out pain medicine they were all full-term and all under 6 pounds in weight I think i was very lucky in carrying all 3 babies and delivering them 😊

[@LynnSmith-ug3jm]

The back pain, for me is still there occasionally! They tried twice with my first to do epidural and only once with my second. I was allergic terribly and got so sick that I accidentally jerked it out leaning over being sick. Second child Dr said formula has changed a bit so let's try again but physically very sick once in. Those entry points have given me problems ever since! Not all the time but a lot! I am now 63, birthed both kids all natural. I wanted it to work so bad but anyway I think it may be the source of your back pain! Good luck!

[@itsbrittfutch9396]

Mama who has had 2 epidurals and a spinal - the lower back pain is the epidural. Happened to me every time. After my first, my back still hurt for a few months.

[@StephyRae83]

Sam, you are truly an AMAZING human being! ❤

[@nataliepage6936]

The epidural and activity afterwards is very different for everyone...I had an epidural with all three of my deliveries. The longest I had to wait after the epidural wore off to get up and walk was three hours. With my last delivery, I got to get up and take a shower after two hours. ❤

[@heatheradams2720]

Pitocin contractions are way more intense than natural contractions 😭

[@Bestie4ever1234]

Hey!!! I love you guys so much ❤❤

[@jadehoffman7734]

I love watching birth stories and I’m thankful you’re willing to share you experience. Please don’t take this the wrong way, why the jump cuts zooming in and out? It’s making me nauseous!!

[@brilliantbutblue]

Thankyou for this priceless gift of life. 🙏

[@beccaroo1990]

It's funny how some people freak out about pooping during delivery,it's normal😂...a lot of the time nurses get rid of it as soon as it happens & it happens so fast you don't even know.but I've seen women argue in comments about it & getting mad when nurses say they lie sometimes when they tell ppl they didnt😂. I'm glad you don't care either way & are like w/e lol. Also, you're incredible for this. I'm so happy for Jake & Kenzy & you❤😊

[@amberbomek4012]

I'm not eligible for surrogacy. But, you definitely inspired me to inquire 💗

[@daniadeane2519]

Def from the epidural I can feel things in my back to this day and my oldest is 17 and youngest is 2, epidurals for all 4 and twice for my first so def a downfall of epidural. Would probably still choose again! ❤

[@donettasetser8703]

I had zero pain medicine or epidural with my last 2 deliveries and they were extremely painful but thankfully fairly quick labor and pushing. 43 minutes of labor and 2 minutes of pushing with my 3rd baby and 4 hours and 20 minutes of labor with 2 minutes of pushing with my 4th. I preferred them over my first 2 with epidurals. The medicine always made me really sick. I was getting sick while pushing with my first 2 children.

[@alee7918]

I just had my 5th and last and currently going through so much emotionally I don’t know how you look like your doing so good specially being a surrogate

[@tendertoad2829]

So glad it went so smoothly! How’s pumping going? Is it your first time ever pumping?

[@jenniwilliams3295]

I had spinals with my c-sections and I never had any back pain but my right thigh on the outer edge has been numb since 2000 when I had my first with the others I chose them to put the spinal in up higher turns out now we know that I have a disease that is causing my spine to fuse starting at the lumbar and in my SI joints in my hips so that would be why. But I could get up and walk usually within like six or seven hours I also heal ridiculously easy from them I feel bad even saying that cuz I know a lot of women struggle to recover from them. And then I had an epidural in for 5 days when I gave birth to my stillbirth. I will say none of those things caused lower back pain I know a lot of women say it does cause them that but I kind of would think that you probably very badly bruised your tailbone because that baby shot out like a cannon! You definitely can bruise even fracture your tailbone when a baby comes out very quickly.

[@johnnamccoy6717]

So no anesthesia doctor told you that epidural doesn’t affect the baby. My baby was affected due to epidural and almost died.

[@ashleymarieeee]

I could walk within an hour after delivery with epidural! So interesting how different bodies are.

[@stephanie6831]

You are amazing 💜🖤

[@ninas4968]

You’re a rockstar! 😉❤️

[@user-kd8yx9ks2l]

I had epidural with all three of my girls. And now till this day, they are 27, 25, 20 the spot where they inserted it in my back is still feels numb every once in a while. ❤❤

[@MegaTelenovela]

You're a trooper 💪🏻 Does it feel wrong emotionally even though mentally it feels right growing and bonding and then birthing someone else's baby? I mean having your own kids how do you differentiate those feelings?

[@marielpindar6312]

Yay!! Love this! 🥹💕

[@SOR1976]

Sam Sam Sam! You are one of a kind!!! I’ve never been or seen anything or even interested in surrogacy until I watched your KZbin channel…. Now I’ve actually sought out out of curiosity to watch more videos about it….. there’s NO CONTENT by anyone I’ve seen compared to YOU or yours …. So with that being said i personally feel that bellybud number 2 needs a sibling!! You have done surrogacy with such a class act as a woman a friend to the ip’s , just everything….. As a mother of two girls one I birthed one I did not I am sooo proud of you!!

[@Memaw1868]

You are Amazing

[@youheather766]

“What if” is fear. “Even if” is faith. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to him and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6.

[@jessicaschrader]

If Jake and Kenzy want a sibling for their little girl would you be open to that with them only?

[@sharonmartin1223]

I heard some mothers that dont carry can breast feed. Is there really a way for moms who have not delivered to nurse

[@nickiebledsoe6302]

You're an amazing gal, so genuine and you're just wonderful! 💖🙂

[@brandaunkingcarter.2330]

Love ❤️ y’all so much stay safe and stay healthy 😇🙏🏾❤️🙌🏾🤟🏾🤍♥️🫶🏾

[@TheCataldos422]

That's normal for up to a year my doctor said with back pain after epidural

[@Rcv6789]

Sam you are a beautiful women and you not having make up doesn’t diminish that. But, I say it with all the sisterly love, the lashes aren’t doing you any good. You should look at all the eye lash blinded videos many women have posted. So beautiful without them! I gotta say the style you choose are noticeably artificial and that contrast with your natural beauty just don’t make sense with your soft features. Again, you are beautiful 😍

[@jessicaleibret8772]

I had 3 boys and I had the tail bone issue to my son is now 20 and my tailbone has never been the same. When u said that I was like that's me I swear I broke it or something

[@Meagan.Jones2024]

Did you ever find yourself comparing the two surrogacy journeys

[@smolsnoodle]

What advice would you give for women who would want to get into this process for friends or strangers ❤

[@briellegranger3887]

trying to watch but why does the video zoom in and out every few seconds?? Would be nice to not have that so I could just watch

[@lifewithmaryellen4016]

I love this story 😍❤ been following for 3 years this is so much better than the last one ❤ (super side note ... Your zooming in and out during editing was driving me nuts .. not a fan-just trying to give feedback) love you girl !! You are a rockstar !!

[@rebeccaatkinson5406]

How did this journey compare to last journey? I don’t mean in relation to pregnancy but the relationship with IPs! I know you have touched on it and I’m not sure how much u can say but would love the comparison and your thoughts on it xxxx side note I am currently newly single and haven’t been able to have my own baby due to fertility issues but my x daughter I was lucky enough brought up from 6 months old new her from 3 months! But recently I have be considering either adopting/ surrogacy but as a single mum? Xxx

[@kelliehorton1105]

The first journey it seemed like they were close but after delivery some drama happened between the two of them and the IP's chose to not remain in contact. This journey they got super close which is amazing. After baby girl was born they knew they were going to stay in contact. They have plans to eachother in October

[@candycakeshake]

Does kenzy vlog?

[@briannemenzel2315]

Do you and Dan want more kids?

[@quinlanhart4308]

Did you do a video

[@GavinAllan-bd5fp]

❤

[@mjohnson8472]

Talking about expenses. Do the IPs medical insurance cover hospital expenses?

[@jessicanoble1834]

There’s usually a separate health insurance the IP’s pay for the surrogate to have, and it should pay for the surrogate’s hospital stay. As for their own insurance, I’d say it would since their child is going to be automatically back-dated once they let their insurance know.

[@mjohnson8472]

@@jessicanoble1834 thank you for answering!!

[@mindyscott3807]

❤❤❤❤

[@amandamatthews2693]

Yes that pain in your back is from the epidural, and it will bother you forever... it never fully goes away.

[@emilykru]

Not true, I’ve had four births all with epidurals, and the pain always goes away after a few months. It won’t necessarily bother her forever 🙄

[@KelseyMc6]

Some people have good experiences with their epidurals. Mine was botched with my first child and left me in chronic pain forever. It’s 12 years later, numerous injections, surgery, etc. I have severe arthritis in my lower back and suffer from pain daily. It caused me endless problems. But I know many people who had no problems after theirs.

[@ninas4968]

I still have back pain on and off from my spinal for my c section 13 years ago. And my lower belly is still numb. Everyone is so different, you’ll have to keep us posted on that issue. ❤

[@KelseyMc6]

@@ninas4968 I am sorry. I am on year 12 of chronic back pain since a failed epidural. I have severe psoriatic arthritis now and have tried everything to help. I’m 3 years post c section and my belly is still numb as well. It’s a weird feeling. I wonder if it will ever go back to normal?

[@donnapalmer9405]

I had 2 and have never had any problems after

[@izzy12285]

I know you said you are 99.9% sure you are done...what if Jake and Kenzy asked you to carry a sibling for their lil girl in the future?? Would you ever consider that?

[@kelliehorton1105]

Yes, I believe they would if Jake and Kenzy wanted a second child

[@KelseyMc6]

I believe I read that somewhere also. That they would only do it again for Jake and kenzy.

[@hompotreka]

Its so frustrating that you are not sharing everything because you do share so much and we are so invested in this story but i do get why but aaahhh… like why such a. big deal about sharing her name??? I dont get this.

[@JustMeChrissLee]

She thinks she's cute by laughing and flirting with wifey while we are live. And yes alr we get the "joke" about the apple vs chips and bun vs tails it was not a you had to be there molment because we were. It just not funny

[@HazardousChaos1]

I'm SOOO glad I didn’t have to be induced & was allowed to just let my body do its job. Not feel forced.