Bob Mortimer: "I once masterminded a daring heist on a campsite tuck shop." | Would I Lie To You?

Bob Mortimer: "I once masterminded a daring heist on a campsite tuck shop."
From Would I Lie to You? Series 13 Episode 5.
Would I Lie to You? is the hit BBC panel show where two teams of celebrity guests try to figure out whether their opponent's ridiculously far-fetched statements about themselves are true or, in fact, a lie.
Featuring inimitable host Rob Brydon with lightning-quick team captains David Mitchell and Lee Mack.
Like Us on Facebook 👉 / wouldilietoyoutv
Follow Us on Twitter 👉 / wilty_tv
Would I Lie to You? is brought to you by Banjiay Rights in partnership with Zeppotron and the BBC.
#WILTY #WouldILieToYou #BBC

[@billyeveryteen7328]

I don't know who the first person was to suggest booking Bob Mortimer on this show, but that person deserves a knighthood.

[@Showmetheevidence-]

ABSOLUTELY 😂😂

[@Galerak1]

Weirdly, at 5:54 when Rob says "So Bob..." it sounded like 'Sir Bob' and I thought "Bob deserves a knighthood', then I see this as the top comment.

[@3lttlbrds]

Facts😂

[@bcaye]

Since he's a celebrated UK comedian, I don't feel it was that brilliant a decision

[@eclectica1]

​@@bcayeYou need to get a clue sunshine.

[@ls1125]

Rob asking "do you remember any of them?" knowing full well it was about to lead to Bob saying some ridiculous name! 🤣🤣

[@Missjunebugfreak]

Yeah, I like how he set that up with a smirk on his face. Bob's nicknames are comedy gold.

[@haunter4708]

Yeah but I always want to know, if he makes up a funny name to get a laugh (which obviously isn’t true) can he still claim the overall story is true? I’m not just aiming this at Bob but I often see the likes of David Mitchell scrutinise certain details of people’s stories that leads me to believe that the rules of the show mean you can’t invent any part of a story that turns out to be true. And as hilarious as Bob is, he clearly invents certain things but most of his stories end up being true!

[@Chpeler]

​@@haunter4708 There's a difference in lying and cracking a joke in this show. Lee also says a lot of untrue things in his stories for comedic effect, but since everyone can tell when it's a joke it's still within the spirit of the game. As for Bob's names, it would be the norm to not give out the names of your friends, specially non-celebs, so using made-up names is perfectly fine. Instead of saying "I can't say his name" or "John Doe", why not make the audience laugh?

[@nagualdesign]

​​@@Chpeler Exactly. If I remember correctly, the first time he did it he made it clear that he was using pseudonyms.

[@randysmith4569]

But what if for some unexplainable quirk of fate, Bob's friends really did have those nicknames. I mean the stories are already unbelievable anyway. Why couldn't he have friends with weird names too.

[@photovincent]

Pulling bits of pollen off a mouse’s handkerchief 😂

[@rollin340]

The phrases he comes up with are always golden.

[@wajihbec1087]

Up there with "fingerprints on an abandoned handrail"

[@anusha8085]

@@wajihbec1087 fingerprints*. But yes!

[@wajihbec1087]

@@anusha8085 ofc! Thank you.

[@broxi93]

​@anusha3085 u really got to spellcheck someone

[@eclectica1]

Watching David Mitchell slowly decompose whenever Bob Mortimer takes his turn on WILTY will never ever stop being an awesome sight.

[@GodotOfficial]

4:47 Smallhead Bob aka Sniper’s Nightmare

[@sovupo]

They ran a double act 😂

[@MrAguila]

No matter how many times I watch this, "Well we put a bit of urine on it" makes me laugh out loud every single time

[@taaamas7785]

It's delivered so well, and I love watching David just crack up instantly

[@FinBrennan]

*Someone every time Bob is on* : What were some names involved? Everyone watching: Here we go… 😂

[@sstills951]

Or when Greg Davies was talking about his friend 'Chinese Dave'. Why was he named 'Chinese Dave'? Greg said "I think it's because he always wore a hat". Bob Mortimer "Well that would be it".

[@AJ-ei3ee]

😂😂😂 Gary Cheeseman - snipers dream. Sergeant Bytheway. Ronnie Omelette 😅😅😅

[@ivankudinov4153]

Bob's tales should be preserved and displayed in museums as a gold standard of humour

[@felipemaldonado8028]

Well, a sample of his 💩 is supposed to be displayed in the Isle of Wight. I don't see why his stories couldn't be somewhere

[@Hearyehearye515]

So these Bob Mortimer clips pop up all the time and I already in my head go “I’m not watching that, I’ve seen it so many times, it’s madness”… then an hour later I finally surface from my WILTY Bob worm hole for the 10th time 🤣

[@equinox9]

I love the way Rob asks 'Do you remember any of them?' He knows some absolutely outlandish names are about to be uttered.

[@thaDjMauz]

With that little grin after asking, he knows full well

[@dalerandall4768]

Bob’s the only guest where even his own team questions him and is trying to work out if it’s a lie.

[@deterlanglytone]

Everytime Bob gives a name I think it either sounds like a children's nursey rhyme or a brunch of Mafia folk

[@wbbartlett]

Brunch with the Mafia sounds like one of Bob's stories.

[@brianybrianbrian]

"Quiffel" I nearly got sick laughing

[@lyannawinter405]

4:55 :D it's just so funny :D

[@felipemaldonado8028]

The same with FOX!

[@kateconacher3454]

Bob: "I once-" Me: true, it's true

[@tobos8909]

"Cracked an egg into my bath"

[@ericanton7]

Alice is the absolute cutest

[@cfgp]

'it's like picking bits of polen of a mouse's hankerchief' only bob would come up with a sentence like that

[@Galerak1]

This was a good one but I liked him describing his memories as "like fingerprints on an abandoned handrail" better.

[@cfgp]

@@Galerak1 that one's great too!

[@lonelyclaud]

@@cfgp@Galerak1 No but for real, I feel like I need to read one of Bob's books - he sounds like he would make a fantastic writer.

[@AJ-ei3ee]

I think this has been said many times before but can Bob get his own show, tales with Bob, telling his stories over the years, I'm not even bothered if they are true or not. My favorite was when Chris Rear put an egg in Bob's bath 😅😅😅

[@andracatheduckking257]

Bringing back Pork Chops Johnson and his back fat later on in the story is just masterful storytelling

[@calum769]

He’s an absolute genius isn’t he, just comedy gold.

[@DannyBrownPodcasts]

Good lord, I could watch Bob tell stories all day.

[@nybbleme]

Alice Levine is absolutely adorable!

[@craiglemon5026]

This is my all-time favourite of all of Bob’s fantastical ‘stories’ on WILTY. 🦆🤣

[@lindaj5492]

Lost it at, “It’s like picking bits of pollen off a mouse’s handkerchief.” 😂

[@lokinachodaisy]

Alice's comment "So they were allowed to bring a friend?" is pure gold. So sweet looking but so deadly.

[@rwhirsch]

this was a new bob story for me.

[@randysmith4569]

Nine times out of ten his unbelievable stories are true. So I'd never choose "Lie" for Bob.

[@plebcrabslayer]

It's never taken me so long to get through a six-minute video because of all the laughter-induced pausing! 😂🤣

[@Thegamingdino133]

I live on these videos WILTY so please keep them coming!!!

[@sstills951]

You can't live on these videos alone. You need to eat something.

[@Thegamingdino133]

@@sstills951 I gain sustenance from Lee mack quips.

[@tiger3249]

I fall asleep listening to wpuld i lie to you compilations.

[@6MikeJones9]

Thank God that Officer Bytheway was there to stop him

[@kidzlogic4302]

The insanity of trying not to laugh on a public bus when when he comments "With that magnificent back" is to much to bare 😂😂😂😂

[@RosaHerronGough-hg1bj]

please carry on with these i like watching them and we love you Rob

[@ef2b]

We learn the motivation for Bob's love of soil science....

[@SteveMikre44]

Brilliant...😅

[@stevo68]

I could imagine having a beer with Bob. It'd be a great night.

[@AJ-ei3ee]

😂 God knows what would end up happening, it would definitely be funny

[@geoffroi-le-Hook]

I would have watched this sooner had I known Alice Levine was in it.

[@ivankudinov4153]

What's the current score of David vs. Bob?

[@daveybew]

WILTY is a great show, would love to see Bob and Vic on the show together, for people who don't know the comedy game show Shooting Stars please check it out, it's also comedy gold !!

[@prakharjain9801]

We meet again

[@angiesemler2408]

“but, it’s *Bob*”

[@benfulfer3260]

Bob’s roommate was a frog kid

[@sonofgaming1546]

Bob has a very easy tell. Whenever he makes up silly names for the story it is true😂

[@ShubhamBhushanCC]

Bob Mortimer has ruined David Mitchell

[@nothingruler14All]

Is the story insane? Is it being told by Bob Mortimer? Then it's true.

[@MxCraven]

The one time the story sounded vaguely plausible it was a lie

[@Microdisney]

@@MxCraventhe Owl on the pillow?

[@skirmish23]

Whenever Bob Mortimer tells a story, I ask myself: At what point does padding a truth with hilarious stories and an unnecessary information become a lie?

[@Statsy10]

I hate to say it, but I agree with you that we are definitely stretching the definition of truth on these (Claudia does it as well). But of course, with Bob's stories I wouldn't change them for the world! 😂

[@user-zr6ee6lb9m]

How would you, without skipping a beat, think of using duck vocalisations as an angle measurement 😂

[@LinkH-w5c]

David just cannot beat this man 😂😂😂

[@Dayvit78]

And David goes down again :) He can never get Bob (well he did once or twice, but...)

[@MOMAN145]

If I had a time machine I would go back and just follow bob around whilst he got up to all these crazy things.

[@pixxie643]

"I once had a time traveller follow me around for years, in hopes of them seeing me do something entertaining."

[@MOMAN145]

@@pixxie643 did they see you do anything entertaining?

[@CeeDeeBC]

Imagine if someone puts as many Mortimer tales as they can into one script and make a film🤯

[@kryptonianguest1903]

I figured that story was true from the title of the video. It fits right in with what we already know about the childhood of ol' Bobby Fever Dream.

[@natisfreezing]

Whenever he is on the show its just so watchable. I love his stories true or false

[@katielasham3326]

I now use "quack" and "fox" when explaining the angles of things 😅

[@onlyinbakedgoods4877]

'Do you remember any of them?' always appreciate the 'alley oop' from Rob. legendary show.

[@WhiskyOctober]

Bob, I raise a glass of Kiss my Alderman to you.

[@Cryten0]

Bobs method on inserting a bunch of lies into his truths make them devilish to work out.

[@nybbleme]

I think if you insert a bunch of lies in there then lie should be the accurate choice. If you've made up 50% of the details that are not true then it's a lie.

[@farje1]

This is Bob Mortimer we are talking about. He’ll always beat David Mitchell, and Davi knows it.

[@lyannawinter405]

2:22 the best question to ask Bob Mortimer xD

[@Oldskoolraver-OG]

Bob did it again. Haha poor David 😂

[@tumolucky17]

Utb