BPD Therapy Vlogs - Week 1

[@MichellePipng]

I totally get what you mean by still feeling like a child sometimes. I I feel like I'm now at the life stage I should have been at 4 years ago. But everyone is different and I think it's okay to not live the most 'normal' and ideal adult life.

[@burpingcricket]

Really relate to the feeling of not being able to grow up due to my mental illness. Being talked down to while being an adult half of the time and then in other ways being so frustrated with my self for not being able to do what other people my age are doing (like traveling and studying and getting a drivers license). Thank you for taking about it!

[@lisawhite2600]

Sounds like a great start! So nice of your grandparents to stay with you - something like that really can make all the difference in an unknown situation. Hope the next session goes just as well! Have a great week :-) x

[@julesk2629]

I’m missed the shit out of you. You are such an inspiration to me. Thanks for all you do.

[@AshAshBaby]

I've never much cared for the label borderline myself, as it comes from a really old school psychoanalytic idea- that it's the "borderline" between neurosis and psychosis, which just isn't accurate to modern understanding of how BPD works at all. Just my two cents as a psychology grad student. but congratulations on getting help! you sound really excited about it and I hope so much this program can help you. It sounds a lot like DBT, which is supposed to be really good for people with BPD. The woman who created it, Marsha Linehan, has BPD herself and is a wonderful example of someone with the disorder living an amazing, productive life- if you're not familiar with her story I think she's a great role model. happy for you!!

[@RisaNoelRomano]

It's so nice to find other people with mental health vlogs. I always found the different/changing names of disorders tricky to keep up with and am constantly worried about using the wrong terminology (sometimes even about myself!) it was nice to hear how you handled that. I'm also curious to see how working in a group goes for you. It's tough for me personally (anxiety, depression, symptoms of OCD), but I'd love to be in more of a community.

[@tara6328]

I'm so so proud of you! You are such a gorgeous person overall and inspire me so much every day; I can't wait for these weekly videos! Lysm ❤ also your room looks amazing xxx

[@charlottetaylor-ashfield4353]

I've recently started an MBTi BPD treatment group and honestly I was feeling so pessimistic about it, and especially after my group today I just wanted to give up, but your video made me feel way more optimistic, the way you describe your illness matches mine (like what you said about feeling like a perpetual child/missing life tutorial.... im a homeowner and doing a phd? but i cant cope with day to day change/regulate my emotions at all/constantly scared of killing myself) but this video just made me feel so positive about tackling my own issues, thank you. I'm really excited to follow along with the rest of the series :)

[@flo-rence222]

This is something I'm so grateful you uploaded today as this is the most perfect day I could have ever watched it within my recovery X

[@joysfulljourney]

Yes, you did it!! I'm so, so very proud of you. You've taken a wonderful first step towards your wellbeing and your dream future. I don't have the opportunity of being a part of this sort of therapy (not available where I live), but I'm very happy it's already helping you grow even more. You are such a strong, kind person. You've got this 💕

[@enchantedforestprincess7968]

You definitely come across very well, at least from what I see of you online. You inspire me so much. And I wish you nothing but good things for the future!

[@Tr3nn4]

You are brave. Your videos have been a source of inspiration to me.

[@AbiSaysThings]

I don't have BPD but I do have some pretty debilitating issues with anxiety and depression and I HARD RELATE to the perpetual child thing. The time after I finished school was a haze and I feel like I've just landed here in my early 20s with just as big dreams as before but no idea how to approach life, and then the added feeling that I'd better learn *immediately* or I'll never have time to do everything I'd like to since everyone else seems so far ahead. It's nice to see this little community in the comments of people who seem similar, makes me smile to see people working towards making their futures better, I hope I can keep doing the same.

[@blackblackheartsss]

Truly wish you all the best!!

[@fionastibbles9550]

Thanks for sharing x

[@MarinasBirthday]

I started DBT for my BPD ( ps. I agree I prefer the term EID!) three weeks ago so this series will be really interesting and helpful to me. I feel like we’re going on this journey together!

[@CKlegion7272]

Really?? I just say that a part of my disorder is that I'm a borderliner. People who don't understand what I mean I just tell, well when start doing something (depending on what it is so not always) I find it very hard to stop..almost impossible to stop with what I'm doing. And most people understand or ask some more questions wich is ok. But kindda "masking" or hidding the core is for the outside world. Within this context I mean. I don't know if that's the way to go but who am I ? I'm sorry, starting to ramble maybe but the point is every few years any "psyc, in the head, problem" get's a new name. There used to be a difference between egoïstic and egocentric same goes for sociopath and psycopath. According to my old psychiatrist there was no more difference between egoïstic and egocentric. I think there is. Same with the other, from sociopath to born with anti social behavior to odd/cd and now within the authisme spectrum leaning towards high functioning syndrom of Asperger with borderline....aso.. I am rambling.. I just think that sounding nicer doesn't make it easier. If you know what I mean..and I don't mean bad in any way.. I'll stop now.. (sorry for writting errors, I am not used to writting in English) Greetings from Netherland

[@ghoulage]

I related so much to certain things you said! It almost feels like relief that someone else feels this way. I started counselling last week so I hope it goes well for me and I hope these sessions go well for you too! Good luck on all your work!

[@kaitlynarsenault3156]

I’m so proud of you Claudia! I loved this video and I am really looking forward to coming along on this journey with you. ♥️

[@pooka1pooka2]

Well done, my darling, so friggin' proud of you for pushing through! I'm looking forward to seeing more about this course, sounds really helpful. Thank you for sharing, you are an inspiration! Sending loads of love and strength to you :) xxxxxx

[@starlovegirl24]

I'm so excited for you! I can't wait to see your progress!!

[@Lilly-iv4rk]

Good luck 😉

[@TheKingMacgregor]

Bit late to the party but all the best on your journey. There's always hope in the darkest of times.

[@RhoadesLessTraveled]

Love you so much and I'm really proud you plan to keep going back! I look forward to seeing the videos every week. ❤

[@george-vk8ke]

congrats !!! so proud of u !!!

[@SpeakNowAvril]

I've just started a DBT workbook alongside CBT phone sessions (because my local health board won't fund DBT) so this will be really interesting to watch alongside it :) xx

[@oliviasmith9033]

So happy it went well for you, Claudia 💖

[@katieridge7366]

I love when you talk about your mental health journey it's really inspiring ❤️

[@georgiabradley1712]

I totally get about the child and how everyone can seem to cope with things and have these special skills which I never seem to be taught and missed out x I’m young for my age and emotionally I can still be like a toddler the issues you can have because of no skills is very upsetting yet everyone else can cope x

[@charlotterose4290]

Good luck with your deadlines for your course!!!

[@MW-bk2nc]

Very interested in this series. Side note: I love how at the end you say “ love you loads”

[@davedogge2280]

Good you're talking postive steps to normalise your mind and heart.

[@BR540E]

"Not in that way" XD You have a lot of aspirations that are more than possible but feel distant, like wanting to become a model. But I'd say you're already a model. One doesn't have to go any further than your Instagram to see that; you're also a well-liked KZbinr, an effective speaker, and entertaining, too! Loads to celebrate!

[@mmc.amethyst]

Claudia, I'm so excited and happy for you! Now that you've talked more about the program you're doing, I've realized it's the same one I did about a year and a half ago (though I was placed for my bipolar and social anxiety disorders, not BPD/EID). It was so life changing for me, I really got a lot out of it, so I hope you will too. I'm really looking forward to seeing your take on the skills and techniques and everything the program works on. Plus, I think it will be good for me to have a little bit of a refresher lol. I so deeply relate to the anxiety and stress associated with starting, and the fear of being perceived as weird or the odd one out. I am so proud of you for committing to the program and attending every meeting in spite of that. Good luck with everything, I really truly hope this is a fantastically positive experience for you.

[@meaganleereads]

I also often worry that I'll be the "weirdest" in a group of people and that I won't be able to relate to anyone because they're all "normal" and will think I'm "crazy". I don't have BPD - I have anxiety disorder and depression - but I'm finding these videos really interesting so far and I'm curious to see what skills you're taught and if any will apply to my life. I totally relate to feeling like you're behind other people. I'm just now taking driving lessons because of my anxiety and I can't fathom going abroad alone. Good luck with everything!

[@butterflypooo]

That's awesome that u r feeling so pumped about the program!!! So exciting!!! :D Hmmm, describing ppl with BPD as "emotionally unstable" sounds really off; vilifying people with mental health issues. Great. I like the sound of "emotional intensity disorder" as well, sounds more accurate.

[@magpieMOB]

This video makes me so happy 😊 everything else I had to say has been said better by others

[@rasheedawilson752]

I am so proud of you Claudia. I wish you all the best. My therapist has recommended group therapy to me before I was curious to know if it be effective for someone like me with Bipolar. You look fantastic btw. Gorgeous 😍 btw, your videos have changed my life so you have achieved something with your social justice/mental health content. Keep going 😍

[@unseenmolee]

Yes! I need more of this in my life❤️

[@melodydanielluna8244]

Wow, I'm really happy for you :) I have a feeling this is going to go well for you. You seem to have a great attitude about it. Best wishes, xo

[@AMOEDEN888]

Wonderful 😊 I am also emotionally intense ( diagnosed ) as well as other mental health issues yet managing it so far ( cognitive behavior therapy has helped a lot ) . I am happy for you dear . Angel hugs n Blessings to you and yours. ~ 💜💜💜~

[@rowanboleyn7383]

I relate an awful lot to what you feel- or, are working on not feeling-, especially in relation to education and learning, as an unmotivated high-achiever. I only want to work if I'm interested in the work, but still get cross at myself if I don't do well. I used to be 'gifted' when I was younger, so I never had to work hard, but now I do. I redid a school year, so I should be in college right now, but I'm still doing my GCSEs, because I missed a whole bunch of school because of mental health and thought I wouldn't reach my potential if I did them last year. But I still feel as though I won't do well enough. I know that I will pass, and it sounds so pretentious if full of myself, but I will feel like a failure if I don't get 7s, 8s, and 9s, because if I hadn't developed mental health issues, I would have. Right now, I am on track to pass, but not get incredibly well, and I just feel so disappointed in myself. I know it sounds stupid. I'm thinking of bringing it up with my therapist, but I have sooo much stuff to discuss with her, and I only see her for an hour a month. And I love your bedsheets omfg

[@liamodonovan3437]

You look beautiful Claudia I hope your first group tearphy went well love your Claudia your videos are always educational

[@orangepulp392]

I know you probably never would, but you're the one KZbinr I'd go to a meetup for 😂 I'm glad the program is going so well for you!!! ❤

[@aboutagirl5085]

My psychologist insists on everyone calling it EUPD. I prefer 'BPD' because I think people are more likely to know what that is (if they are gonna know at all) even though I think there is some confusion with bipolar. Sounds a lot like my sessions. Today's (28th Feb ) should have been my third one but was rescheduled to next week and I forgot and went in anyway. I like the sessions up to this point- the first one I was anxious about what it would be like. Got myself into a panic about arriving there and getting back, which happens to me basically every time I go somewhere new. I panic about getting lost or stranded. When I got there the entire group was so anxious basically no one spoke or made eye contact and it kind of made me feel even more nervous. The first session I held back quite a lot because of this, I thought I was terribly anxious but I'm the most talkative person in the group and I didn't want to seem like I was taking over everything. The first one we created group rules,like: Don't breach other people's confidentiality, have your phone on silent if you are going to be late let reception know etc and then we had a discussion about what the course would entail and a small introduction. we also talked about recovery and pros and cons of it. Second session people spoke a bit more but still not much, and in this session we actually started the course and got our workbooks. Yours sounds more specific to BPD than what I'm doing. There is a few people with BPD in my group, but I don't know everyone's diagnoses (obviously). I was told when I was enrolled onto it, that is the course people with EUPD/BPD would be enrolled onto, but they never once talked about BPD specifically while we were in there? I love the thing you said about it feeling like everyone else has been taught how to cope, I relate to that so much. I don't get how other people do stuff either. I feel that was a relief for a lot of the people in the sessions as well, like 'oh, there are other people that get this!' I'm also studying (masters in music performance) balancing mental health, the therapy and a masters degree is hard. Sorry for waffling and thank you for sharing.

[@ClaudiaBoleyn]

This isn't waffling! It's super relatable! I agree with you about everyone not making eye contact at first. I think we were all pretty shy during this first session. I'm the same as you with the panic about getting there thing as well. I got really sick in the morning beforehand. xxx

[@caitling3868]

❤️!

[@helenas436]

Yesssss claudia, go on gal

[@bergaymott]

💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

[@Alanahhhh]

so happy for you CB

[@Art-zp1qg]

I’m so happy for you Claudia and I really hope it goes well in the next 19 meetings. Love you❤️ (Btw whats that picture behind you if its okay to ask)

[@ClaudiaBoleyn]

All the art is by the same amazing artist called Jenny Slife. The one with the guy on his own is of Aaron from Emmerdale, next to that is Aaron and Liv (my favourite bro and sis from Emmerdale), and the one with the two guys is Robert and Aaron, also from Emmerdale xxx

[@beckyginger3432]

Flip chart

[@jinnbs414]

No dislikes yet... Being shameless really does work! :D

[@jane7997]

i so relate that i can't live my life worrying im gonna kill myself tomorrow. i really want to enjoy my life but i don't know how.

[@celinak5062]

Kids In The Hall comedian got f'ed by the Canadian court and his ex-wife, who had bpd. That's at least where some guys first hear about it, afaik