Hoaxes that Went Way Too Far

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[@brainblaze6526]

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[@llperlrll]

If Magellan actually gave 2 crapz about history they'd get renamed to "The Enrique de Malacca streaming service"...

[@Kiefsti]

@@llperlrll So you've mentioned.

[@llperlrll]

@@Kiefsti Donno mabe because a video that touches on themes such as systemic racism, seems to be sponsored by a company deliberetly named after a slavemaster who never actually did that thing that made him famous ... So if Magellan wanted the name Magellan because of some build in metaphorical meaning to suggest the bridging of gaps between cultures worldwide ... Then they made a mistake which in it self might greet potential costumers in a slightly racist tone... Keep in mind their target audience are people with atleast some historical background knowledge... And naming a company like this without thinking about the historical implications of said name is just a lack of professionalism...

[@icarus_falling]

What have they actually done to your collarbone? Pinned it or what?

[@Kiefsti]

@@llperlrll *glances at your rant* yup, two sides of my ancestors faced racism also. Slavery and death too! Calm down dude, it's not worth your health.

[@jacobmarkley6943]

What really killed mediums and magic with Houdini was that when "communicating" with his dead mother, the medium called him Harold. Harry Houdini was a stage name. His real name was Erik Weisz.

[@ultimamage3]

That and the medium was speaking and writing notes "from Cecilia" in English and topped with a Christian cross when Houdini's mother was a Yiddish woman married to a rabbi and devoutly Jewish-- she didn't speak or write a lick of English, much less could she be capable of writing Merry Christmas on a note.

[@jacobmarkley6943]

@@ultimamage3 I forgot about that part

[@ohnonotagain8935]

If only Google was a thing back then, she could have done some research first like all the others do

[@sse_weston4138]

Simon: Describing a very wholesome moment with his daughter Sam: *Casually inserts human centipede*

[@mammuchan8923]

A rare misstep for Sam, we will forgive this one time

[@DroidAssembly]

@@mammuchan8923 misstep?!? that was top tier meming, he deserves a pay raise for that alone

[@jakenkid]

Better than... Hmm... Yikes... I can't think of anything worse than a human cempertede! 🤣

[@miristtotallw]

@@jakenkid Some people argue that Tusk was worse but the gross gore fandom isn't unified in this question tbh (Spoiler alert: In the movie Tusk a man is turned into a Walrus through rearranging some bones, adding a bit of fat here and there, you know, such stuff)

[@jakenkid]

@@miristtotallw You just couldn't resist, could you...? 😁 Still tho, a human centipede... Multiple people, AND THEY ALL LOSE! Tusk, there's no head up your ass, you're not eating shit... Just sayin'...🤣

[@beagleuk3233]

"SAM CUE THE MEME" "nooooooooo" Lost my shit 😂

[@runed0s86]

I love their petty fights. They're so cute, it's like they're indirectly flirting with eachother... AM I RIGHT PETER

[@slcpunk2740]

@@runed0s86 kzbin.info/www/bejne/nWjCemmhn56ZisU

[@katiasofiagonzales1235]

Simon smiles while talking about his kid * everybody liked that*

[@jenniferhof9448]

Such genuine happiness on his face. So awesome to see. ❤

[@DayZeroGaming]

I can't wait to find a partner and do the same tbh

[@jamescritchlow3445]

I gave this video a like just because of the amount of joy Simon had talking about his kid.

[@octo_0523]

And then the editor put in human centipede

[@justsomeone1038]

Everyone also smiled about the human centipede when he talked about the caterpillar.

[@amandajones661]

Simon's doctor: I'm so proud. I put this man's shoulder together so perfectly! All he has to do is heal. Simon's doctor when he watches Simon do BB: Nooooooo!

[@countcain]

I once broke my collarbone and I refused to move my upper body for weeks. Simon‘s just that wild.

[@caitlinbarker645]

@@countcain I imagine it's very painful. Surely it hurts every time you breathe?

[@Kiefsti]

@@caitlinbarker645 I was just talking about this with someone else! Will Simon be able to mountain bike again? Collarbone replacement seems...fragile

[@caitlinbarker645]

@@KiefstiI can imagine Simon biking one-handed and yelling "oh noooooo..." as he goes off track. Once it's healed, if all the precautions and rehab work is done they seem pretty good, but it's 12+ months. Some people even get the metal plate removed later.

[@countcain]

@@caitlinbarker645 Yeah pretty much. Everytime I tried to pick something from the floor, pain. Everytime I tried to straighten back up, pain. Lying down, pain, no matter if on my back or on my side or on my stomach. I think it‘s especially mean because you can‘t put a cast around it, so you will definitely accidentally move too much. I wore a special bandage, that looked like rucksack straps, which tried to keep the bones and my posture in the right place, but bandages like that can‘t hold everything. Keep in mind, I was around 13 years old, so it might have hurt more, but still. That stuff‘s no joke.

[@erikm5221]

Child Simon: **pulls out glass bottle from mud wall** Child Simon: "This is crazy! AM I RIGHT, PETER?!" Peter: **look of concern**

[@ajstevens1652]

🤣

[@Vincent-2057]

My thoughts exactly

[@anthonyscott6929]

I'm just imagining a three foot tall bald kid with a beard and I now accept this as cannon

[@ncbentle9154]

​@@anthonyscott6929😂

[@themartinebunny]

The fairy thing was too funny. They were just two little girls who liked fairies, and decided to make some fairy pictures in the garden. Next thing they know, a bunch of adults are like "OMG! Real fairies!" And Arthur Conan Doyle is involved, and they couldn't really just be like "Umm... We were playing?" 🤣

[@Mister_MS.PAC-MAN]

They had some fairly odd parents…

[@themartinebunny]

@@Mister_MS.PAC-MAN haha.

[@DJSockmonkeyMusic]

I find it absolutely hilarious that Sir Arthur was completely convinced that the fairy photos were 100% real. Years later, Harry Houdini spent an entire evening trying to convince Sir Arthur Conan Doyle that he did not have magic powers, that he just did tricks, showing him how the escapes worked, even demonstrating cold reading and other mentalist tricks and Sir Arthur just kept chuckling and proclaiming that he wouldn't be fooled, he knew Harry had magic powers and was reading his mind...🤣🤣🤣

[@jayray2761]

Simon’s daughter: Daddy! Father Christmas is going to visit tonight and bring me and (insert name of Whistler’s second kid) presents! Simon: No, he’s not. Is he? Santa Claus is not real, popet. Neither is Mikulaš or Jezisek or whatever. There’s only one bearded guy who brings you presents on Christmas and his name ain’t Santa! Simon’s daughter: …but daddy… Christmas is magic! Simon: Magic isn’t real either. You’re just another tiny, momentary speck within an indifferent universe. Simon’s daughter: …but I thought you hated the marvel movies… Simon: *pauses, realizing his kid really is smart* GO TO BED!

[@mammuchan8923]

Simons daughter : daddy will you please watch Star Wars with me Simon : errrr

[@SRW_]

Simons daughter: im sick of magic spoon!!! Simon: out of the house!!!

[@bluepvp900]

I share Simon's skepticism and really struggled with the Santa Claus thing, eventually allowing the lie to be presented to them, and they're now nearing an age where they know it's BS. I feel it was a mistake to do so, and the easy way out to go along with the silliness, but also wonder if it isn't best to go along with it and let them have some fun. We lie about things everyday anyway, maybe this one isn't all that bad, I still don't know on this one. Religion is clearly harmful and dangerous, Santa not so much.

[@jayray2761]

@@bluepvp900 idk, man. Santa’s pretty dangerous… breaking into people houses… stealing junk food and milk… dude clearly has an eating disorder… enslaving people of shorter stature… giving “presents” to kids he doesn’t know…. watching kids when they’re sleeping… *and* when they’re awake and making lists of “naughty” kids… killing hobos! I mean sounds pretty dangerous to me. Not a good roll model at all. Don’t take presents from strangers, kids. Also, breaking and entering is a crime. Is killing hobos illegal… probably not a good idea at any rate, though.

[@hereticpariah6_66]

*ALLEGEDLY!!!*

[@wut274]

Well, obviously number 1 will be Simon keeping his staff in the basement, because that's all a hoax right?... Right? 😅🤣🤣

[@malcap]

You give Simon too much credit. It's just a crawl space.

[@zachaliles]

@@malcap eating the spiders costs extra!

[@stacyrussell460]

Allegedly

[@cristinesplinis5815]

Or is it…?

[@brainblaze6526]

RIGHT

[@amandajones661]

I love Simon's passion when he talks about his daughter. He lights up when he talks about her. 🤗🤗🤗

[@autosmo4248]

What time is it at?

[@LegionOfShrooms]

🤦‍♂️

[@antiisocial]

@@autosmo4248 was going to say the same thing. All my kids are old. Lol

[@SkuLLetjaH]

That "Very Hungry Caterpillar" joke by Sam, tho! LOL.

[@ClipsFromMaine]

I was born in ‘80, left home at 14, and I have Never bought a cable package in my life… exposure on TV 😂

[@GrubbsandWyrm]

Houdini challenged Conan Doyle, saying that if he could do a trick that couldn't be explained it was proof against the paranormal. He did, but instead of conceding, Conan Doyle decided he was a wizard

[@JoshSweetvale]

Smart people can bullshit themselves too. This is usually the only thing that makes people like Houdini (and Randi and Penn&Teller) _angry._

[@CornPopsDood]

@@JoshSweetvale Always loved Penn & Teller.

[@5777Whatup]

God it took me a while to get this joke 😂 🤦‍♂️

[@truefact844]

I am a wizard, I can make spells... First I mix some oil, minerals and metals... I use the power of the sun and then cast the spell using letters and numbers with some strange symbols...Now we .can see Simon in this strange square... Magic, please tell me its not?

[@markholdahl6511]

"You're a wizard, Harry!" - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

[@jaycenzimbeck7638]

I want to imagine Simon's kids watching Business Blaze many years from now and seeing how much their dad talks about them. It's very heartwarming to see just how much they're on his mind.

[@aceundead4750]

In between the lines of coke, right next to the rotting turtle and adhd. Not necessarily in that order, or any order, i imagine Simon's brain being like a tornado

[@terryenby2304]

Did you see casual criminalist? He had a full on gush moment this week! Was absolutely adorable and reminds me how I felt when my babies were actual babies too!

[@jaycenzimbeck7638]

@@terryenby2304 yeah! Usually when he mentions his kids in CC it's because something terrible is happening to children though, so I think any father would think of their kids in that moment.

[@isaacschmitt4803]

Quick bit on the Balloon Boy thing, it may not have actually been a hoax after all. There is some evidence that the local sheriff was out to make a name for himself with a big public scandal and that there were a lot of leading questions in the interrogation of the kid and wife. The Internet Historian has two videos on this subject and it's worth at least a viewing.

[@Seraph_Krow]

Came here to say this, thumbs up for visibility

[@brendonwood7595]

So what was the ballon for, if not a hoax?

[@PastorOfMuppets91]

Heene worked a lot with balloons. He was a self-styled inventor.

[@chadcuckproducer1037]

Internet Historian is a vastly underrated channel with high production values and good research.

[@isaacschmitt4803]

@@brendonwood7595 As someone else said, he is/was an inventor/KZbin personality. The balloon was an experiment and was not supposed to be launched at that time. If you watch the video, you can tell he was *not* happy it launched, and when they thought their son was on the balloon, they were very clearly panicking.

[@greenhowie]

So when Simon says "AM I RIGHT, PETER??" he's remembering the days when he pulled random stuff out of a huge pile of shit? I mean it's a pretty good analogy for Business Blaze to be fair.

[@JozefLucifugeKorzeniowski]

Peter was the name of a character from a crazy misogynistic postal meter ad. Peter tells a super insulting story about his weak woman secretary and then inquires whether he can kill her. When Simon references peter its usually because the material he's talking about is bigoted on a level that peter would appreciate. But maybe, on a subconscious level, the two stories are connected.

[@JoshSweetvale]

Oh my god it adds up. Freud might've been a coked-up sex criminal, but he was right (Peter!) about this.

[@TheSoftestGirlYouKnow]

~illuminati music~

[@theHotpointHoodlum]

Simon, don’t be so hard on yourself, 99% of us are here for the tangents…

[@tammystockley-loughlin7680]

My life is a tangent, lol. I am ready for anything to happen or to be amused by an overheard conversation...I work in a small grocery store in a college town....there are sometimes a quote of the day. Positive vibes from New Hampshire, remember to be kind to each other and yourself during this pandemic and social crisis

[@Daviticus042]

I'm not.

[@ONEDVSDVIT]

always knew i was a 1%.... AM I RIGHT PETER??? but seriously... 99% of your tangents are 99% too long... turn a 10 minute video into 19min.55 seconds... so i gotta play your videos at x1.99 speed ... to make up for all the GOD DAMN TANGENTS SIMON!!! FFS LOL

[@hollymcdowell2865]

I love the tangents…and Peter!!!

[@JeeVeeHaych]

Simon: "There's no such thing as magic!" Me: But... what about magic spoon(s)...?

[@mktrill]

There is no spoon, there is only yourself

[@JeeVeeHaych]

@@mktrill Impossible! It's clearly a supernatural spoon, I saw a cat eat from it and turn into a (bearded & bald) man

[@SRW_]

@@mktrill In self loathing

[@Daviticus042]

@@mktrill There is no spoon, it is you that bends.

[@dannahbanana11235]

HA! Got em

[@LadyLenaki]

Weekend jail is something I've seen only for parents with kids. It's less disruptive to the kids, like they can stay with friends or family on weekends but with their parents during the school week. It basically keeps kids out of full-time foster care.

[@flowertrue]

I've seen it for people with jobs so they don't lose them

[@LadyLenaki]

@@flowertrue Cool, that makes sense.

[@renren4m802]

Dammit Sam that “very hungry caterpillar” cutaway killed me!

[@mrmojomajestic8317]

I read this before seeing it and I still did not see it coming. 😲 I think your comment made it even funnier. 😂

[@ValentineS97]

simon talking about his kid just made my heart so fuckin happy, man…

[@bythebeardofmatt]

Holy shit right???

[@annettepenwell6220]

Houdini had a secret code for his wife who tried to reach him in the beyond for the rest of her life, she never did.

[@Foolish188]

Simon never had childhood friends, Tim was what he named a dead oak tree. That is why he has to keep his "Friends" chained up in the basement.

[@runed0s86]

Simon records while locked in the basement. Danny is one of his many personalities. I don't think I've ever seen him eat anything other than sponsor food, water, and coffee.

[@Daviticus042]

I knew it. 😏

[@toddnolastname4485]

Are we sure Simon's not the one locked in a basement? And the wife and child are fiction that they force him to talk about? If I was the guy behind one of Simon's channels, and he was the reason it was such a success, I wouldn't want to risk losing him.

[@Azby64]

Simon: Joyfully recounting his reading children's books with his daughter. Sam: Already typing in search, predicting the need for a "Human Centipede" image.

[@jeremyborder6794]

I don’t believe in the supernatural, however the stories are often a lot of fun. They’re full wonder & imagination

[@Wootguy238]

Oh they're full of it, alright.

[@QueerCripple]

I personally believe that everything labeled supernatural is just stuff we don't understand yet. Humans used to basically panic every time there was a solar eclipse because they didn't know what was happening, but now we do.

[@chriscollins550]

@@QueerCripple that is how we got God

[@QueerCripple]

@@chriscollins550 correct. Technically God is still the explanation for that which we do not understand to this day! I personally have chosen to believe in a God or Godlike Energy, and simply see it as something I am unable to understand yet, which humanity may never understand. I think there is a perfectly sound and scientific reasoning for everything, but there is also a comfort in the idea that maybe there is some "magical" being of sorts watching over us. Technically I'm an agnostic theist, a christian and a satanist at the same time, but unlike the evangelical christians I take things a lot less seriously. Maybe there is a mass of energy somewhere in space that is shooting out radiation and that Radiation is causing things to happen on Earth that we interpret as God :D

[@odog1999]

OGBBs know that the video originally ended early while Danny and ETA implemented their escape plan, then Sam forgot to release the "real" video to cover their tracks

[@chrish9980]

you caught that too! I wondered why the episode ended mid sentence.

[@dilanbrinkley3587]

ALLEGEDLY

[@mildlydazed9608]

A 3 min cut for an escape plan? Oh Danny and Sam could do better.

[@geekdivaherself]

Who is Estimated Time of Arrival?

[@odog1999]

​@@geekdivaherself Sounds like some watching of older Business Blaze videos is in order ;-)

[@Adendum82]

Another episode in Simon's ongoing "Wanna Bet I Can Get This Video Demonetized, Too?" series. Love it ❤

[@hollymcdowell2865]

Oh my gosh right?!

[@I3IackSabbath]

Simon: I'd rather be doing something than sit on my ass. Also Simon in every Business Blaze: Danny, this script is too long, my legs hurt!

[@ethoswolf7597]

I thought internet historian proved that the balloon boy wasn’t a prank but an accident?

[@kaylanrodger7088]

Not really proof, just a different look at it and potential evidence that the family was screwed by corrupt officials and the court of public opinion.

[@smiller3995]

Someone put Simon in a cone of shame just so he don't scratch

[@maniaemagna]

I was raised by Jehovah's Witnesses so I read stuff like Man, Myth and Magic because some of the stuff in there was forbidden. I didn't believe they were true but found the stories interesting. One story that stuck out out was a step-mother got jealous of how much the father loved his children so she turned the kids into swans. She regretted what she did but couldn't reverse the curse. They didn't change back to human until the first Christians landed on the island as a result they almost instantly aged to death. Edit: I finally remembered the story was about the children of Lir.

[@deathmetaldahlia]

Hello fellow exjw!

[@RedneckWarlock]

​@@deathmetaldahliame too! Haha I was so afraid of getting attacked by demons if I was bad lol

[@aguaarch]

Business Blaze is one of the most random things recommended to me on youtube and it is its own genre .....and it is glorious!

[@feraldelight]

Simon: Harry Potter is for kids Also Simon: I love revisiting kids' books with my daughter. Some of us don't have kids for that excuse to work 😭

[@madalice5134]

I work in a bookstore and I like to read a bit of everything, both because I'm a big need and because I don't like giving people random recommendations that I know nothing about. I still enjoy reading children's books, even before this job, because they're fun, but now I have a job related excuse.

[@TrineDaely]

You could volunteer to read to kids. Or just enjoy the books because you enjoy the books. Mom had Shakespeare and Stephen King on the shelf next to Stuart Little books, and I picked up the habit myself.

[@kellyfarrar6639]

SImon's story about his friend Tim, no not Tim, it was Peter's garden, is the reason why Buisness Blaze is my favorite of Simon's channels

[@stuarthamilton679]

I don't know why or how but Simon's tangent about his mate Dave, no Tim, Bob, Mary, no Peter lol was the funniest thing I have heard in ages.

[@sp3lllz]

sam is the unsung hero of this channel his edits are so fucking hilarious always catches me off gaurd

[@pulepebane5679]

Simon says "what is going on?" So often I'm starting to worry that he's really living in a constant state of confusion

[@walfman100]

I mean his job is reciting massive amounts of information all day, he has even mentioned that he sometimes goes completely autopilot mode while reading scripts. So it makes sense that he kinda looses track.

[@deadeye8843]

That's Florida, right?

[@fatalgravity]

Aren't we all just living in a constant state of confusion?

[@madalice5134]

It's called ADHD. We of the adhd tribe tend to live between states of brain bounce chaos or hyperfocus that can make hours pass on useless shit without noticing that the time has passed. On occasion the hyperfocus is useful when it can be directed though.

[@victor9sur768]

the bee meme to Simon's requests kills me every damn time.......Sam, you absolute legend

[@littlemissgwendolen1466]

I love the Harry Houdini story because apparently the medium wrote out several pages of messages and after all of that, he revealed that his mother couldn’t speak english

[@robirvine6970]

Why would a spirit be unable to communicate in any language it wanted to?

[@hookedentertainment9089]

I for one like when Danny's scripts are at least half an HR long. It gives Simon more chances for tangents but it's just a touch of his frustration that makes it better

[@kyky8862]

Simon talking about his children is the most wholesome thing ever and it’s all the more wonderful as part of a ranty BB video 😂❤️

[@Dsdcain]

Sam's memes are on fire in this video. I think Sam deserves three quarters rations for the video. Come on Blaze Boi give that guy a treat. 😎

[@hannibal9503]

That would mean blaze boi has to lift his arm and shit, and he is too whingy with his broken collarbone

[@mrrizzla4961]

27:18 - theeeeee, very hungry catterpiller. That memeing Sam! Take a bloody bow!

[@Conformist138]

The coolest part of Wolf Blitzer's name is that it's his legit birth name

[@4crafters597]

Tbh the whole Ballon Boy got teared apart by the Internet Historian who found out that there are more layers to this, and maybe the whole Media circus forced the family to play a hand they weren't dealt. Apparently they even got pardoned few years later, so we will likely never now the full story

[@Jimizacx]

That video is a good watch

[@generalgarchomp333]

​@walkandarun8167especially seeing how many people took it at face value and even today believe it. Shit even skeptics like Simon, and with how much research David usually does they fell for it hook line and sinker.

[@scottykomer9992]

The “very hungry caterpillar” -> “human centipede” cutaway made me genuinely lol for a while.

[@gmoney4980]

Thank you Sam for doing two of my Fav memes used on Blaze back to back... "Nooooo..." "Jokes on you... I'M IN TO THAT SHIT!"🤣

[@bradlevantis913]

The excitement as he was talking about reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar made the video

[@DrNothing23]

Glass Bottle dumps are pretty common. There is a subclass of 'picker' that, in fact, seeks them out to excavate rare old glass types for collections. They are pretty much exactly as you described; mud or clay walls you endlessly pull them from.

[@joehemmann1156]

I love Simon's brain. Dead center of a sentence in the middle of a rambling anecdote about a magical wall of mud, he just stops to correct the name of his friend at the center of the tale. Was it Run or was it Peter?!

[@lone6718]

Harry Houdini was one of the OG myth busters when it came mediums. Being a magician meant he knew their tricks. He would a live smack down of every medium that had balls to agree to it.

[@3vom918]

Can't remember the comedian who did it: "Have you got a copy of Psychic News?" "You tell me."

[@Ahalaya]

Okay, good. I was afraid I was going crazy when this ended suddenly the first time around.

[@Johnnyde94v2]

Same

[@EvanRustMakes]

Same

[@benmonia7105]

Saaame

[@robertaviles8451]

First round ended at 38:36 out of the running time 40:40 ! I feel like Simon must've gone down to the basement and... "disciplined" Danny for the video mess up!

[@Johnnyde94v2]

@@robertaviles8451 wouldn’t Sam be the one to be punished as he is the resident editor (memologest)

[@beckyowens2586]

I live in Illinois in the US and we have the same law concerning traffic accidents. I barely tapped a handicapped van (everyone was fine) scuffed up their bumper a bit and punctured mine with my own license plate and we had to stay RIGHT THERE until the cops came and told us we could move to a parking lot 100 yards away. Thankfully we were only in a turning lane, but still. Unless anyone is hurt or the damage is bad enough a vehicle is impaired, I agree, take a photo and move out of the way.

[@advena996]

That's super funny, because where I grew up in California, my understanding is that minor accidents are supposed to move to the shoulder so as not to impede traffic.

[@Col_Fragg]

@@advena996 That's provided there are no deaths or injuries. Weirdly, it seems that you don't have to notify the police but rather have to notify the DMV within ten days. This is a really bad idea. I've lost track of how many people failed to get a police report and then the story of the accident becomes a "I Said, They Said Story." And guess who gets stuck with the repair bill?

[@advena996]

@@Col_Fragg obviously

[@mathewmurray4901]

Interment Historian did several videos on the Balloon Boy incident, and there is a lot of details left out in the mainstream story. The actual story makes it out to be an accident, and not the family trying to pull a hoax. One of their other kids said Falcon was in the balloon when it took off. And The wife was a very poor English speaker, and the police kept asking her leading questions to make it out into a hoax. Same thing with Falcon being left alone with investigators who asked him why his parents lied type questions. The whole cost of the rescue is why the family was being pursued to try and recoup the costs of everything, and the perceived public outrage. People should look up Internet Historians video if they’re interested.

[@generalgarchomp333]

Kinda makes me sad how few people are pointing to this out.😊

[@Skel1001]

Every time I watch business blaze I can’t help but imagine Simon standing in front of a mall Santa yelling at kids that it’s all fake

[@mdansbyjr]

Would **LOVE** to see the crew cover the SCP Copyright Scandal ... if for no other reason than to hear more of the Demonic Simon!!!

[@weirdkitty07]

Telling the kid not to look at a secret book on the shelf is practically an invitation to look at the book. Ha.

[@dustinshadle732]

Those weekend sentences are usually to help keep a parent to manage the kids, or keep your job. It sometimes includes community service with overnight stays in your county departments jail cell. Not usually prison. These are the lowest security, lowest risk people that usually get this sort of sentences. A couple of people I know went down that path.

[@--enyo--]

This is one of my favourite videos in a while. From the adorable anecdotes about the kids to some absolute zinger lines & on point editing by Sam.

[@slayingroosters4355]

I was perusing KZbin the other day and happened upon a video by bbc earth about the Iberian lynx. The top comment was someone asking how a wild cat keeps his beard so fine and groomed. I replied with a link to beard blaze 🤣

[@decojdjful]

The very hungry caterpillar / centipede bit... Sam, that was so funny!

[@iliketowatchducks]

I always wondered if Simon watched his videos before uploading them. I was like there is no ways he has time. Simon you silly Billy

[@otgenesis7410]

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

[@bobbowers9037]

Excellent words to live by, it's a shame however that a large portion of the population switch the placements of improbable and impossible. ;)

[@otgenesis7410]

It's rather unfortunate.

[@Drejco515]

I've been wondering all night, "Why is KZbin recommending I watch a BB video I just watched this morning?" Then I clicked on it to make sure it was the same video when I realized, "Oh wait, Simon reuploaded it because it just cutoff in the middle of a sentence before, lol." Business Blaze, as always, is at the cutting edge of professional content creation.

[@crazytrain7114]

With luck, Simon, that will never end! My 22 y.o. still calls back Kipling and musical quotes from when I sang and read to them as babies

[@dexocube]

I can't believe you talked about The Education of Little Tree! my mum just lent me that book a few days ago, saying it was good and I should read it. After reading about 20 pages or so I could smell bull, the kid was supposed to be 5 years old and he could remember the moon was 3/4 full when he went with his grandparents, and all the native american cliches just didn't ring true. Sure enough when I looked the author up it turned out to be a hoax and I had to explain to my mum that the nice book she read was by some mad racist div.

[@tst4783]

As a small child I broke one of my Nan's good plates. When asked I denied any involvement and told her the bad fairies broke it. It seemed so plausible to 6 year old me. I was astonished when she didn't believe me and in twice as much trouble for lying.

[@Irisspring9339]

Thank you for the last few minutes fact boy lol. watched this earlier and it just cut off i was like "wtf mate"

[@pseudotasuki]

I believe them about Balloon Boy. Falcon was confused about the question and thought he was being asked about why they had launched the balloon, not why he had hidden in the house.

[@brendonwood7595]

Without the kid, how does launching the balloon attract any attention?

[@pseudotasuki]

@@brendonwood7595 It looks like a UFO.

[@generalgarchomp333]

Also there's the fact that the main point of the balloon was for experiments. Hence why there was thousands of dollars worth of tech in the baloon.

[@danielortman2534]

The Cherokee largely sided with the Confederacy and a Cherokee was the last Confederate general to surrender. Stand Wattie might be an interesting Biographics guy to do.

[@itsapittie]

I started elementary school with his great-grandson but I didn't know the significance of Stand Watie until I was an adult. It was a small country school in northeastern Oklahoma which no longer exists. A handful of the kids I started school with were fluent in their Native language and spoke very limited English. The first curse words I learned were in the Muskogee (Creek) language and my first child crush was a Native girl. My fascination with Native American culture has lasted my entire life. My father was culturally white but purportedly 1/8 Cherokee which would make me 6.25% Native American. Interestingly, my DNA profile through two different companies showed about 10% Native American ancestry. It was very common in the 19th and early 20th centuries for Native women married to white men to deny their ancestry and apparently there is some of that in my lineage. Kind of a long way of saying...yeah, Stand Watie would make a good study for Biographics.

[@itsapittie]

Also, I'd like to see a Megaprojects about the Chickasaw Removal. Compared to many other tribes, the movement of the Chickasaws from Mississippi to Oklahoma entailed relatively little suffering death. This was primarily due to the remarkable foresight and planning of the tribal leaders who led one of the most organized migrations in history.

[@yoblazes]

No amount of bullshit is going to justify the confederacy actually being, "okay".....stop it.

[@danielortman2534]

@@yoblazes did I say otherwise? Pretty sure I just said that a lot of the Cherokee sided with the Confederacy and that Stand Wattie was both the last Confederate general to surrender. The only thing that wasn’t objective fact was what I thought would make an interesting Biographics video. Are you so threatened by non white people supporting the CSA?

[@InciniumVGC]

@@yoblazes Who's trying to say it's "okay", things can be interesting while not being okay, like lives of serial killers and the like. Some people just like interesting things and aren't prudes, okay?

[@CGingRun]

This ark of the collar bone injury is so complicatedly out of order with the video drops. I love it it's like watching momento it Requiem for a dream

[@flowertrue]

Or that Seinfeld where they played clips in reverse where they went to a wedding in India.. George painted his Timberland shoes black and nobody would trade their birthday wish with Kramer

[@littlekerrfury]

So I was halfway through the original, and it suddenly stopped. I was really confused there for a minute, doesn't help that I'm just recently back to civilization, sick and off schedule.

[@blackmagemasher4031]

Irony is the video broke JUST after he made fun of the Dr needing a tighter edit

[@jeremyborder6794]

The funny thing is that Houdini was a huge skeptic while Doyle was a true believer. I think there was a tv show centered around the premise of them solving mysteries or something

[@jeremybrown2186]

Yes there was it was actually a pretty good show too lol

[@jaymevosburgh3660]

I would check that out. Going to have to look it up.

[@JoshSweetvale]

"An open mind is like a fortress with its gates unbarred and unguarded."

[@naga5707]

@@JoshSweetvale "an open mind is like a fortress, with it's gates unbarred and unguarded" - Librarian WH40K Dawn of War

[@JoshSweetvale]

@@naga5707 An open mine?

[@philipzielinski]

When your voiceover and narration career hits its apex, you get to be given a script to read along with whatever commentary strikes your fancy … and it’s brilliant. Well done and congratulations.

[@ravencanis8998]

“And we’d pull out all kinds of shit, it was amazing!” Made me think of our old mate Peter, the one who’s always agreeing with Simon 😂

[@flowertrue]

Past Simon: I've found an old medicine bottle His pal Peter: This makes me hate women!

[@snorlax6691]

The only magic permitted on this channel is Magic Spoon! Though, for real, I wouldn’t mind having that 24 volume set of Of Man, Myth, and Magic. I love that old school artwork and stuff that shows up in books like that, it’s really cool looking. And I’m pretty sure it’d be entertaining to read.

[@runed0s86]

I'd think it'd be as entertaining as the original Grimm's fairy tales

[@madalice5134]

There's a special edition magazine that my bookstore got in with a similar name that has so much cool style art like early cartography and early nautical maps that is worth getting just for that. I also really like mythology, folklore and the patterns you find across cultures, because as I've said before, I'm a big ole nerd. I think the exact title of the mag is Man, Myths and Beasts of Legend.

[@davidagosta]

Simon: Fairies aren't real! Genetic engineers: *what if ... pygmy marmoset + butterfly?* Hold my beer

[@geekehUK]

What I've never understood about the whole balloon boy thing is how the hell did people spend $2Million and however many hours trying to mount any kind of rescue mission without anybody ever pointing out that if the kid was inside the balloon he was absolutely 100% dead. YOU CAN'T BREATHE HELIUM!

[@Juicewski2]

There was a large compartment under the balloon for measuring instruments and such.

[@robirvine6970]

I've never understood why people don't spend 10 seconds googling their question before putting it up.

[@annettepenwell6220]

Simon, thats how we all found you on KZbin, BEST FIND EVER FOUND ON KZbin 😁

[@Statinthehat]

Fairies wear boots and you gotta believe me I saw it, I saw it, I tell you no lie.

[@gs4984]

Sorry son you've gone to far..smoking and tripping are all that you do.

[@busterhikney6936]

with Jean cut off shorts and nylon tank tops

[@Soph27199]

Simon just savaging TV producers/TV in general is amazing.

[@SeanNyte]

I absolutely loved the tangent about doing Community Service... I think you're right about that... As far as those people who lied about their child missing... When it comes to jail sentences, I honestly think should be reserved for people who are a danger to the community... Violent Criminals, Drug Dealers, Etc... Maybe some Addicts who choose to commit crimes constantly... This is just my opinion on that subject...

[@crankyyankee2475]

Wolf Blitzer: 30 years on CNN, believing everyone on the planet hangs on every word he says. Simon: Knows who he is because of a cameo on a mission impossible movie. Absolutely brilliant.

[@talibnunnally1531]

Simon: *loads up for badum Simon's shoulder: i'm a bad bitch you can't kill me!

[@LongNickOfDaLaw]

Simon’s love for his daughter is beautiful… she probably doesn’t understand why you light up and smile all big just talking about her.. but I am the same way every time someone will listen to me talk about my daughter

[@Rattys]

Then, Simon goes on a rant about his imaginary childhood friend taking him to the city dump to dig up pill bottles.

[@GryphonBrokewing]

"my shoulder" reminded me of Danny Kaye's character in "White Christmas"...and I'm a little irritated to be thinking about winter holidays when I'm clinging to the bitter end of summer.

[@richardaubrecht2822]

Simon, in Czechia, you actually can just take a photo and drive the car away, if the damage is minor and you and the other guy decided not to call cops. You just file a form together (you are supposed to have one with you in the car) and then both of you file it with your insurance company. I did it just a week ago, I filed it online (you don't even need to attach ta copy of the form, altough it's better, you can just fill the info from the paper to the online form) and it was done in twenty minutes.

[@MaddMaggs]

Ok, but seriously, who has that form on hand?

[@richardaubrecht2822]

@@MaddMaggs It should be in every vehicle in Czechia, and it's a self-copying form (you write in one, text is copied on the one under it, altough with worse quality) so both you and the other guy have one for your insurance company. Altough I used all mine years ago and forgot to pick up new one.

[@JeeVeeHaych]

@@MaddMaggs Not from Czechia myself, but it's the same in my country. Pretty much everyone has that form in their car, it comes standard with these insurance folders and other paperwork.

[@geekdivaherself]

@@richardaubrecht2822 In America we call those forms carbon copy forms after the active ingredient in the original forms, by the way. It's where the term _CC_ comes from, as in the line after the To line in an email header. This is just in case you didn't know, since it sounded like you were describing something rather than using the term for it. The British term might be the same.

[@richardaubrecht2822]

@@geekdivaherself Carbon copy, right. I was trying desperately to remember how to say it in English.

[@forestxander]

Simon: "Is it?!?" Me: spits chewed up cookie all over my phone in 100% unexpected gaffaw.

[@Perl88]

Childhood Simon: “My friend has a mud portal in his garden. AM I RIGHT PETER?!”

[@theprimo100]

Sounds like He and his friend were just playing in a pile of garbage to me...

[@jeffrichards1537]

I was digging to put a pool in a few years ago and found old glass milk bottles and medicine bottles. The dairy they were from closed in the 1940's

[@runed0s86]

Did you drink the milk?

[@MaxBeaulieu]

Hey Simon have you watched the internet historian's video on the balloon boy and the follow-up? It's actually super nuanced!

[@Thelykane69]

The most amazing fact in this video is at 19:37 when we find out that Wife Swap is over 100 years old, dating back to before the introduction of television. I should imagine performed live in Globe-esque theatres. You don’t have to imagine that though

[@Phatxual]

Fun fact: For a book to become a 'Best-Seller' in Canada they only have to sell 5000 copies

[@permafrostprod1]

I was intringued by your comment so I Googled it. So the reality is that best seller list are made by weekly analysis of sales and you have to sell a few thousands book in *one week* to a diverse group (Not from a mailing list or on pre-order by followers for exemple). Also the number of books you have to sell is not fixed but rather determined by the overall book sell for that week (Christmas would need an higher number than a mid june week for exemple). *source : www.booknetcanada.ca/blog/2018/11/12/what-makes-a-book-a-bestseller + some other sites that come on a Google search and the Wikipedia on "bestsellers"

[@caitlinbarker645]

@@permafrostprod1 Thank you! You saved me doing the same search

[@permafrostprod1]

@@caitlinbarker645 Haha! you're welcome 🤓

[@Weeble_Wobble]

This is actually a *bonus fact.

[@meg8078]

People in Canada are too cold and too busy going to Tim Horton’s to read like 9 months a year

[@ZOB4]

You briefly mentioned "Winston Churchill's involvement - no that would be too interesting" - This evening my wife asked me if I could invite any five people to a dinner party - good ol' WC was the first on the list. Dude was an absolute legend in the most grandiose sense. Others included Jesus, an Aramaic-to-English translator, David Bowie, and Bill Clinton.

[@chadp363]

It seems a perfect fit that Magellan sponsored this video

[@JonDoe-rq2lf]

We've always loved to thrill ourselves with titillating stories of wherever gives us heeby jeebys at the time. Humans never change

[@Aj-hr7ym]

Simon, you gonna switch this to private again or let me watch it! hahaha got half way thru and THIS VIDEO IS UNAVAILABLE. switched to private. come on fact boi!! love the channels keep it up.

[@derekschommer1465]

He fucked up and cut off the last few minutes.

[@derekschommer1465]

Allegedly.

[@ajsparx4133]

*looks at username* 🤨 What did I (we?) miss?

[@derekschommer1465]

@@ajsparx4133 half of the last story was cut off abruptly and it ended at like 38:25 so he re uploaded.

[@ajsparx4133]

@@derekschommer1465 well hey, so we got more BB than the original upload? Aight Dope

[@venicewright7126]

Ok so a couple weeks ago I found the Casual Criminalist. Today I finally got around to this channel, am 59 seconds in and I already know this is gonna be my next channel binge

[@DeronJ]

24:00 If you receive a pardon in the US, you are still considered a convicted criminal. The pardon just removes the punishment.

[@username65585]

A commutation of sentence just removes the punishment. A pardon does more such as restoring the ability to vote although you are right that it does not expunge their record.

[@JoaoPessoa86]

@@username65585 I think there was a supreme court case establishing that acceptance of a pardon was an admission of guilt