Breakup Fears: When you want ‘them’ more than they want you - Susan Winter

Shift from anxiety to confidence within a matter of minutes by using “The Internal Accountant” technique. This perspective turns the tables on an unresolved breakup fear while putting you back in control of your emotions.
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[@johnairisc]

After 2 years I’m finally free of this. I wanted to let everyone know that it will come to pass. Being on the other side of a broken heart is the best thing ever! Thank you Susan, for being part of this journey.

[@sherriflemming3218]

Sometimes it's relief. Peaceful again.

[@marislyra]

Became addicted to your videos! What I love the most about them is that you show that in fact everything in a relationship is about us and how we deal with our emotions, put the focus in ourselves! I've realised that the pain of a breakup aches less that way..thank you again!!

[@SusanWinter]

Mariana! I'M SO HAPPY TO READ THIS! Your comment in the last line about the origin of pain in a breakup makes is wonderful. You've got it. Thank you for this note. I'm pleased to have such a bright light in my KZbin family.

[@MayaNature113]

Susan, that is exactly how it goes and only until we start realizing own value...thank you

[@Markymarkbejammin]

I wrote down everything I don't like about my ex on paper. It's a god send! When I did this it made me realize I have to completely let go.

[@Cesiumkid]

Susan...wish I would have found your posts a long time ago. I am in a "relationship" with a self-centered, narcissistic woman that is usually MIA in our relationship. Yes, it's all about Chris. I have waited 2 years for her to become present in our relationship and attempt to do her part by investing in our future together. My placement on her priority list is high only when I can provide her with fun trips, dinners, etc. I'm like many guys my age (65) that are patient and hopes for a better day and improvement (hope springs eternal). After listening to one of your videos that essentially asked the question "why are you here in this relationship?" I experienced a release, clarity and new found power of realizing it's not all about Chris, I am important also. Not to sound selfish, I am the most important person now. It's my life and time that is passing me by. I am making plans now to move back to my home in the state I came from and get ready for the next phase of my life. Possibly, God willing, new and more fulfilling relationships. Susan, thanks again.

[@UhHellandDoomIguess]

Where were you three months ago. I needed this. I’ve been watching your videos non-stop and they’ve been giving me such a clarity in working through my recent break up. Thank you!

[@girlinthesouth850]

This is EXACTLY where I'm at right now.

[@SusanWinter]

Incredbile. I love reading about the synchronicity.

[@doseofdesi926]

+Susan Winter In my situation I used to wake up in the morning and as soon as I did I would almost loose my breath bc the sense of negativity and warning urging me to stop about my special person. I tried to push it away until the anxiety made my appearance change, I lost thw color in my face, I had bags under my eyes....i was a mess and eventually I had to move on bc it was JUST NOT RIGHT. I'm glad I need bc I got myself bk

[@VivVal33]

Haha, absolutely loved the analogy of the "accountant". I could honestly say that you can pick up on how your relationship will be with certain person the first time you go out with them. We women are the queens at giving opportunities. Our big hearts get in the way i guess!!! As for the advise in asking ourselves "is this really what i want and need?" it is just so powerful, Susan! Thanks again for being a beacon of hope for everyone trying to make it right in the world of dating. XO

[@SusanWinter]

Viviana, I really appreciate your comments. We women (who truly love) must also become smart with whom we share that love. I ignored my internal accountant for too many times. Then, I started getting the 'alert' messages. Now it's easy to know what to say and how to say whatever's on my mind. Wishing you love and light.

[@VivVal33]

Susan Winter Thank you!

[@VivVal33]

Susan Winter I am working on my communication skills, believe it or not it is extremely hard for me to say what i feel and want. So i end up resenting and closing up.

[@user-fk8rb8ue5h]

In a nutshell, go with your gut feeling.

[@debralondon2402]

Amen

[@shannonrussell9651]

Thank you, I needed this today. I have had really bad luck in relationships. It’s like I get to a certain point and they just end things for weird reasons or it fades. It’s beyond difficult to be single at my age, but I’m also learning to put myself first, grow, and realize what I want and deserve. Your videos have helped me so much. Thank you

[@Saifalfalasi1]

Brilliant!!! Thank you for rebuilding my self-esteem, Susan. "Internal Accountant" is the one thing I never had because I used to focus on Him. I never put myself first. I used to hear every warning Bell, probably even louder than the bells of Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris. Yet, I still put my blazing devotion on the other guy because I had zero self-worth. I will never self-flagellate again. I cannot tell you what an incredible magnificent feeling it is, to fall in love with yourself and who you were meant to be. Thank you, Susan. I honestly can't thank you enough.

[@hawkkim1974]

Just let it go and be free by not having anything

[@JC.Realm7]

That's a big part of why you even manifested a breakup - there was a part of you that didn't want the relationship.

[@Ladybeck-br8hf]

Thank you for giving us these valuable lessons

[@SusanWinter]

You are welcome! Thank you for writing to me, and for watching the video.

[@craiasanoptii]

I wish I would have watched this 3 years ago. Great video Susan, you're an inspiration.

[@deqaabdi5599]

I wish I have found this great video five to six months ago when I broken up with my ex. This will safe me a lot time. Great advice well done

[@P.willow]

What a beautiful clean crisp room. Bright and fresh. Totally off topic but another great video. This woman is my Oprah Winfrey 😂

[@kamran.i]

What she is saying is absolutely right always have the dignity to walk away from something which doesn't serves your purpose.....my internal accountant was always going off in our 4 years of relationship never got reciprocated at many levels kept pouring and pouring my self out of hope and got nothing in return untill I got ditched

[@LoadSheddingSession]

Thank you, Susan! You have helped me so much the last 4 weeks. I have watched around 30 of your videos each helping me and giving me the next crucial step or perspective. The only regret I have is not discovering your work 10 years ago :) Thanks so much! Gratitude and ♥ Thank you. Thank you.

[@Sherlika_Gregori]

The account is intuition

[@shaheenakhtar1544]

Hi Susan , just love listening to your talk, they make things so easy, m going through same situation, where m not getting what m paying in, I just need to build courage to take control, I feel weak to stand up to what's giving me more pain then pleasure. M gonna keep listening to this lecture to build my strength Thank you so much

[@philyip4432]

You are so right on again !! You are great !!

[@SusanWinter]

phil yip THANK YOU!!

[@MaryBartnikowski]

thank you Susan, I'm sitting back and hearing my own accountant, #truth

[@SusanWinter]

haha. Love it Mary. Pretty cool that we have our own internal CPA (available 24/7).

[@MaryBartnikowski]

Thanks for the reminder, one thing I learned from solo world travel is this: trust your gut!

[@SusanWinter]

Mary Bartnikowski - I love that phrase. Absolutely correct. Out gout always tells the truth.

[@gingafinga]

gout is nasty ;-)

[@jenniferravolet9852]

Susan, this was amazing. You have a way to formulate concepts that I absolutely love. The inner accountant aka Intuition is our greatest tool in love indeed.

[@veronicasmith1332]

i cant stop listening your videos they are great i feel good about my self

[@cwoods8940]

Susan, you are amazing, so helpful, clear, insightful, kind, caring, speaking from the heart& with such understanding & intelligence ♥️ You've helped me loads

[@myrahouse2368]

😬 cringe when you look back at how needy you became during this time 🤭and the knowing you really stuck around to long. They bread crumb you well! Emotionally they are over you. By the time is ‘over’ the dumpee is raw while the other is over it already 🤔

[@John-ih7gp]

Just been going through this over the last few months. Eesh it hurts sooo badly. I've taken a step back and realized how pathetic it was. It is so true how you said it, "They Bread Crumb you well."

[@myrahouse2368]

Same I was damn pathetic patient. 😖

[@lovetrustandpixiedust]

Yeah, I'm currently looking back on my past self and cringing at how needy and desperate I was. It's okay, I've learned a lesson. Moving on stronger.

[@barbieshs777]

Your videos always pop up at the perfect time. Thank you! Your advice is priceless and I can tell you are truly enlightened and give your guidance and advice with love and care.

[@ElisabethSangberg]

I love your lingo and the way to explain things! You speak directly to my common sense. Thanks for sharing your wisdom!

[@Acalelithe]

What a great perspective! I've been recently challenge with what to do in my relationship and your "internal accountant" concept resonates with me.

[@bjewel3751]

You are so good at explaining and helping us get in touch more with our intuition. New admiring subscriber! Thank you for your gift and sharing with all of us.

[@colinheaton6934]

You are always right Susan

[@shivaniartanddesign2007]

Wow! This is exactly what I've been thinking the last few days! Thank you

[@shekinahfire5936]

You know your stuff Susan. You can learn a lot if one pay attention. 💯🔑

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you!

[@Hanson586]

I'm here currently w/my wife. Over 2 months of "Space" and it's killing me.

[@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488]

Move on.

[@davidthomspson9771]

Just let go....you cant make someone like you.

[@kellystone1535]

Beautiful hair you have Susan

[@Eyat369]

❤️you’re wise

[@P.willow]

I'm just here right now in my life. 😭

[@mara1275]

Thank you so much! God bless you!

[@parfecto7716]

Susan, You are amazing! Thank you for your videos, very helpful and down to earth. The best advice there is!

[@theresachung703]

Susan, how did you get so wise?!! I don’t understand!

[@umpalumpa-qw8ru]

Thank god I found this video. This is exactly my situation. I put much more into this than she does and yet I want her and ask myself, why she pulled back. Maybe I should have a talk with my accountant

[@65philo]

Wise you are

[@tarunsabharwal1751]

Very well said. Thankyou

[@dd-pw8tw]

Your videos provide clarity, you have helped me through some confusing times by speaking to my inner truth aka accountant 😄excellent !!!thank you Susan

[@flexyxs]

Awesome, great tip! Thank you so much Susan !

[@priyanka776]

This is me. Grateful to you for your advise.

[@kwonjiyong73]

I love your video, every single of them

[@listairgin]

Thank you Susan! This is another avenue of thought that could possibly give us in need of help just a little bit more strength to soothe our emotional pain. The accountant inside us , that's a good one. Thank you! 🌌x

[@evangelistsstone]

What an amazing powerful word🙌👏 thank you so much for sharing

[@lorriekelly964]

Yep. U. So. Right. My Alert. Has. Been. On. Along. Time.

[@samerinakhanpolitics2949]

Good advice

[@reinavirtucio2229]

I know it's for their best

[@veronicatalavera9454]

lord only knows how drained n exhausted I am trying hold to a relationship that is abusive n toxic and I thank lord for keeping me strong not doing sutin stupid like suicide I just wish that I would leave this guy that causing me so much damage mentally emotionally I don't deserve it😢😭😭😭😭

[@Labiadore]

You look very pretty in this video x

[@SusanWinter]

Thank you Reggie!

[@VivVal33]

Reggie Reg agreed! those colors are a great contrast to her hair and skin color... 🙂

[@SusanWinter]

Thanks Viviana Valverde and Reggie Reg

[@gina72916]

In the thrashing period...ugh! Thanks for the advice.

[@hennylo68]

She really does.

[@johngreen1776]

You are very wise for your age!

[@MrFazzza]

brilliant

[@COSMICCFREQUENCY144]

Wow susan! You’re a genius. I’ve never heard anyone put It like this

[@anatnabi2]

i love your stuff!!!!! you are incredible -thank you for your videos

[@olympiaelda1121]

Youre the best. Thank you!

[@ilsewenzel7227]

Thanks, I needed that

[@patriciabonner2354]

You are so good....always right on the monies....you are right....i went into panic mode when my narssasist of ten years started ifmgnoring me my calls my txts..all the while chasi g him ...getting nada back.....i been backing way off now just the opposite....like today he said want to meet at the park for coffee...i said sur arounf 9 and red mountain ? And atre youbringing the coffee...all i got was sorry i cant.....i just couldnt take it and i txt back i just dont need this shot anymore i have a full plate and thoufmght mayve we could hsve tslked this sm ..gee i really needed a friend ..ill ttys...nothing back....am i crying ..yup he hasfone this everyday this eeek asked to see me then makes sn excuse like i did something wrong and he sais nm not going....i think he is playing head games im not sure but im a wreck...but i didnt give in and kisd his ass today..... Yay me

[@AnneMelb2010]

So much GOOD advise in such a short time. Excellent. :)

[@hellooholly]

AnneMelb2010 i

[@cherbug1197]

i’m guilty of chasing.

[@iamhere3618]

That is not the case. She will do fine.

[@josenavas9968]

Thanks for the advice. Even though roughly it has been eight months since the first broad cast. I feel very much interested in what you have to say.

[@dellchica2373]

Ditto ditto ditto. I am at this period right now😐after only 4 months

[@lucyloo7457]

I want to break up. Not sure how?

[@SlatherBird]

🙏🏻

[@sandandress]

hi Susan ❤❤

[@benedictaalfonso5802]

I’m scared to get sick again

[@jovialfaltisco548]

I don't want him anymore vv

[@MarioArroyo-uc2fc]

Hi love how are you doing today and how is your day

[@terrilee734]

Chasing is so wrong.

[@augustolineiro1642]

Hi Susan. Your channel is great / you speak so gracefully that it’s impossible not to like your posts whatever the topic is. Question. Does the no contact tech works in gay couples? Would be very nice if you incorporate more gay topics or within the same topics that you tech on regular couples maybe just give hints wether it will also work with gay couples or not ... sometimes techniques might not work when both persons are from the same sex. Please please keep on.

[@MarioArroyo-uc2fc]

Yes I am lonely my birthday is today

[@clarkluse2918]

Pretty eyes. Geepers creapers where did you get those eyes?

[@cnadiar87]

Hi Susan love your vids and advice ! may I ask after seeing this vid- I’ve realised I tend to ignore my accountant, with an optimistic belief in who I am over what someone does or makes me feel - with almost all types of relationships in my life- Is there something I should/can do to ensure I listen to my accountant more and change this in me ? X

[@popstargirl79]

Glory, hallelujah! Amen :)

[@lymanmayhew935]

Oh look you don't have 14 pillows on your bed,say it isn't so! Lmao. Again great work Susan 💪

[@emanuel_soundtrack]

What about saying to them to delete contacts right after you see the texts beginn to die out of the break up text? So they will rethink your value

[@emanuel_soundtrack]

My girl break up but stays there. She send another text answering, didn’t read and don’t want to read

[@odenbarrett7442]

She is 1 Fine looking Lady

[@naturelife2473]

Can any one tell any nice apps ? I need a girl friend . I found a few dating apps most are fake . Can any one tell me if you know.

[@T_bone]

I just date multiple women so I am never left feeling like crap. When one rejects me or starts acting flaky I have options. When you put all your emotional eggs in an unproven basket you may end up with ALL your eggs broken. That being said it is hard when you hope that THIS basket is "the one".

[@SusanWinter]

Tyrone, have you ever considered making a solid investment in one-woman? To be honest-I have a feeling some of the women who flake do so because they sense you're not paying attention to them. Just asking.

[@T_bone]

Susan Winter I feel like if you spend more then a day per week or so with one woman, especially if you are in the first few weeks they tend to get bored faster. I have tried it both ways. I partition my time from the one I like the most to the ones I like by am not as sure about.

[@sherriflemming3218]

It sounds like he has difficulty being alone or dates to fill a void. Avoidant attachment?