Burning Man Tips & Tricks # 18 "SHY at BRC"

[@oldschoolisnewschool]

In 2023 i saw you as you were puting up your shade structure. Eventhow you were building the shade stucture you still took a minute out of your time to say hi and gave me a hug. That was the best. I felt like if i said something that i was going to bother you. But you walked up to me and gave me that 1 minute of your time. That was wonderful thank you. Im sorry to here that you may not make it this year to the burn. You will be missed by many people. Thank you for your dailly gratitude circles at 9 am. Keep up the great work.

[@wifigod]

Hey John, I just wanted to thank you so much for this video (and all the rest!!!) and share a little nugget of my own personal experience. After wanting to go for 10 years and researching every little facet about the Burn, I finally made it in 2013 (as well as last year). The main reason why I didn’t go was that I was super shy with social anxiety and had no social group that had heard of, let alone wanted to visit, TTitD. I tried and tried to find people local to me that shared the same interests, but always came up empty handed. By pure chance, the world gave me an opportunity and I seized it with all of my with all my heart. A roommate was dating a gal that had been a few times and she was really excited to share her perspective with me. After hours of conversation, she invited me to attend our local regional with her later that summer. Best decision of my life! From then until now, I have met some of the most fascinating, kind, hardworking, empathetic souls I have ever encountered and they have all become my chosen family. Since my first regional, I started to watch your videos and follow your camp’s projects and haven’t stopped since! We have never met, yet you have gifted me so much that I will be forever grateful. My first year, we were camped fairly close to you guys (7:30 & Esplanade), so I would always walk right by you guys on my way to the 9 o’clock plaza and beyond. Every time I walked by, I would tell myself that I wanted to find you and give you a hug and thank you for all your gifts, and every time, I would seize up in fear and continue walking. It’s odd, as I was and still am much more open while on the Playa, but I think I just built you and your camp up too much in my head that I was afraid of the rejection you mentioned in the video. Obviously, looking back now, I see how silly that is/was, but that experience combined with this video has taught me a lesson that I won’t soon forget! Unfortunately, due to financial troubles this year (lost job), I won’t be able to make it out to the Playa with my camp or my projects. It sucks, but it is what it is. What I would like to state now is that visiting you next year and giving you a hug and thank you is going to be one of my top priorities for the week. In fact, I’ll likely make an effort to track you down on build week when it’s a little less hectic (with people, that is, I know it’s always hectic building your camp!). PS: Watching your videos before my first year inspired me to color my hair bright pink. So, I went to my local store and found some dye and low and behold, your fantastic mug was on the box! That memory sealed my belief that everything is connected and the world will offer itself to you if you are open to accept it. I know that’s a silly conclusion to come to while buying hair dye at the grocery store, but I cannot rationally explain emotion, only feel it. ~Namaste~

[@alexfouquetfr]

I have never heard such comforting words. Truly looking forward for this burning man year, and to see you at pink heart. Thank you for your love

[@HugNation]

Yay! Have a beautiful journey!

[@leirawhite2680]

One more thing. :) what I have learned about gifting from the Man has helped me give better in the big desert of my life. Went plan old camping with some very none burner folk. This group has been camping together for 20+ years and has it down to a science. I jump in to help with breakfast in the morning and did some poi around the fire at night. These people thought I was some magical being that I was not just there to drink their booze and lay on my butt, I was willing to be a part. This is what the playa gifted me, the mindset to carry all that good with me EVERYWHERE thx again see you at Home.

[@EmmaBlue]

+Victoria alvarez-chacon amen!

[@HugNation]

YES! That is beautiful.

[@superamericanickmarks]

Wow. What did I just stumble into. I am going. I don't know when I can make it. I am locked into my work. I feel like I am on an island trying to change the world. Sourrounded by zombies. I see you guys figured out a much better way to save it. Just be nice:) I am working on a video game about connecting people. A game to experience one another. I have been working on it off and on for six years. I guess I am writing all this because you said it was like this at burning man. Sharing. I want to come and try this out. It sounds like nirvana.

[@ThunderAppeal]

How many BJs did you gift?

[@yodaguy6956]

Nick Marks come on out brother, it's the friendliest place on Earth, 70,000 people completely uninihibited, openly accepting and celebrating everyone's individuality and however they choose to express it.

[@Silenced-td4xt]

I'm getting ready to go on my first burn. I'm watching this and your philosophy is so beautiful. It literally made me see myself in a different light. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

[@HugNation]

So happy to hear that! I hope we get a chance to hug in the dust. ❤

[@gusgus8113]

Loved the video and can relate so much, I’m the guy at the disco in Mexico, hope to hug you on playa this year as struggle with hugs too😊

[@joshuahaubert7685]

I’m extremely introverted in the real world but I’m coming to burning man solo this year for the first time to step out of my box! You really helped with my social anxiety and I hope I run into you this year so I can thank you in person!

[@HugNation]

Fantastic! I look forward to meting you!

[@RainLeander]

Thank you for asking this question, Willow. And thank you for answering it, John. I can soooo relate and feel equipped to tackle this puzzle for myself both at the Burn this year and in default world every day.

[@HugNation]

((HUG)) Hope to see you in the dust!!!

[@DrunkenConqueror]

Thanks so much for this. It resonates me with me deeply. -- and funny enough, I saw you last year and was so "shy" to stop and say thank you for all you do, and hug ya. But really. Thanks for all you do, Halcyon. I'll swing by this year for sure.

[@DavidKirwanirl]

Such a pleasure to listen to passionate people. Burning man sounds like it would be an amazing trip tbh!

[@mummyjohn]

Come!

[@1Chumlee]

Hi John, I felt welcome in Pink Heart, and by you. (it was a legendary hug). note for the shy - Invited- it's something that everyone at BRC should feel. Everyone is welcome. Radical inclusion "Anyone may be a part of Burning Man. We welcome and respect the stranger. No prerequisites exist for participation in our community." This was written with a broad stroke for general organizing, meaning anyone is welcome to the Burning Man culture. if the space is open - you should feel welcome. if you don't know anyone - make yourself known, and if you are insecure about your presence in a space - ask! :) you will find welcoming people everywhere. Chumlee.

[@1Chumlee]

+John Halcyon Styn I am grateful for finding you, online and in the dust of BM. ai wish I was still able to watch your show live, I will again.

[@subtao9023]

Very interesting insight delivered in a so charming and genuine way. Thank you.

[@micahtime]

Beautifully said, as always. I agree 100% that the interaction is what we all desire and is therefore a gift. We never know in the first few moments, where the interaction will go or how long it will last but that too is the beauty of the gift of that moment and those moments can really help shape one's experience overall...on the playa and elsewhere.

[@JediAkasha]

Loving these videos - thank you!! I met the love of my life, and he is a burner. He wants to take me to a regional burn and these videos help me understand SO much of what this is all I'm excited to take part.

[@Joshatdot]

Hey John .. I too feel the same way when going & visiting other camps. But when I am hosting/bartending something at our camp, I LOVE that people are having a good time & enjoying the gifts/services we provide to other burners.

[@dianhartono5321]

It will be my first time at Burning Man this year. These videos are really helpful! Hope to see you there :)

[@timwizard]

Great perspective. Really appreciate the reminder that our social fears are all in our head :)

[@markeduardo]

Woooow!!!! Uffff!!! I just find pardise now. Thank you so much!!! ❤️🌎❤️

[@shaneodonnell2515]

Goddamn! This is such a wonderful, helpful reframing 🙏

[@HugNation]

So glad it helps, Shane!

[@aliceadler4569]

Love you, John Halcyon Styn! When I come to Burning Man hopefully next year I'm looking you up!

[@mummyjohn]

Once I went to a bar adjacent a small concert venue with my best friend; we get each other really well though I always considered him much more connective & social than I. I'm feeling a little out-of-place in this bar, seems like full of "cool kids" that're on some other level that I don't quite understand or fit into. I notice this tall, rail-thin guy with a radically asymmetrical haircut in a booth with these two very 'alternative' looking, quite attractive, girls close on him. I say to my friend, "Hey man, you think that guy's in the band?" My friend turns to me and in a moment of absolute brilliance says, "Everyone in the room is in the band." Changed my life.

[@HugNation]

YES! I love this.

[@Dutch1954]

I find you rather amazing and inspirational, Thank You for being you, you've helped me be me....Best Of Health Always.....Dutch

[@KoolKyle_Adventures]

I appreciate you posting this topic Halcyon!! I needed to hear this one. Thank you buddy, see you at )'(ome!!

[@serenagregor1364]

What beautiful advice, so lovely,thank you xx

[@ritavolkland4433]

Love the new camera location!

[@internetcomment4440]

Met you onplaya this year. Your amazing

[@HugNation]

Thank you!! Hope to see you again in the dust!

[@SomeRandomguy.42]

Im going to the Australian burning man(burning seed) this year its my first year and Iv been watching this video and i hope to implement your teachings because i am a very shy and nervous person.

[@thiswonderfuldaycpt]

Thank you for reviewing my recent comments. I look forward to our dialogue. I trust the infinite has led me to you at this time to learn something and I look forward to that awakening and shared experience.

[@thiswonderfuldaycpt]

+John Halcyon Styn Sadly no, the playa did not connect us yet.

[@EmmaBlue]

on a practical note, maybe just take a moment to feel your feet connected to the earth welcoming you below, your toes, and observe the people you want to approach--trust your intuition! the beautiful thing about making the effort to go out in to bum fuck Nevada Mars desert is that generally people are not in a rush and make a human connection with you with eye contact/ authentic smiling...which we don't get a lot randomly on an elevator in Civilization :) kind of expensive experience but worth it for a week in itself at least once!

[@amndaluv]

you are sweet. this resonates hard 🙏🏼

[@HugNation]

Much love! ((HUG))!

[@mgs9003]

minute 9 is wonderful

[@michaelmuchness]

Great Subject.

[@EmmaBlue]

"furring things...logistics...carrying things" dont forget the hot pants and ketchup!

[@sharmaraygoldman9415]

I have been playful with the word Namaste, i have said "Now- must- Stay" and i have said at the end of gatherings "Now- must- go" Something fun to consider...or not. :)

[@HugNation]

Love it. Byron Katie has a great story about mishearing everyone saying "No Mistake" when the bowed to her.

[@hayseman]

If Willow follows the comment section at all I have another tip for her on how to approach people. I usually have two tests when I am looking for someone to meet. The first when we both make eye contact. That obviously means we got each other's attention. Then I usually smile at that person. If that person smiles back than it is alright to approach them. If the person just glances at you or not smile back than move on and seek the next person that will want to talk to you or do other things with you. Also too what Halcyon said they may be busy at that moment and chances are if you wait a little bit and see them finished with whatever they were doing. Then approach them. Its a pretty basic tip. I work at a resort and I am meeting thousands of people per year. So I have learned the signs they give me to act towards them. Its surprising actually how much people are so much alike when it comes to interaction despite how different they are.

[@timgreen6384]

Your Hugness there are people that do not say Hello to you.

[@MienemLeben]

I was given this article by someone about Burning Man: www.salon.com/2016/09/03/he-went-to-burning-man-and-never-came-back/

[@hollyklarsen]

Oh John ... there is another calling for you ... helping teenagers think like this. I'm going to hope to see you at home!! I'm bringing my 15 year old ...

[@jamesgonzales3808]

Holly Larsen i brought my two kids (15 son & 18 daughter) my daughter had an excellent time, totally spread her wings. My sons eyes were wide open all the time just soaking it in. Go for it !

[@yodaguy6956]

It's funny how people worry about kids being there, as if 70,000 people peacefully celebrating individuality is a dangerous thing. Everyone I saw was very respectful of the presence of kids, and there is an insane amount if cool people to meet and things for kids to do. If you take them fir a desert walk at 2:30am on the Playa in a sandstorm you just might bump into me wandering around dispensing freshly grilled peaches with seared pancetta, pistachios, cinnamon, and New Hampshire maple syrup...... - Oasis

[@omarm.d2578]

Thank u bro!

[@HugNation]

My pleasure! See you there?

[@jakobdodd8066]

there is nothing wrong, in conversation, with "regurgitating" info you understood from a legitimate scientific article. that is how *some* people learn.

[@bridgetmchugh9113]

I am fun fact friendly

[@Reemuphill]

I am so hugging you

[@timgreen6384]

It is not a '.' Statement more of a '?' Statement.

[@HugNation]

Of course! All different types. :)

[@ritavolkland4433]

lol

[@thiswonderfuldaycpt]

I want to like this video, I really do, but you really need to work on your gender inclusive language. Please, for the love of all things beautiful in this world, stop saying men and woman, stop being binary in your phrasing just after you get through saying "get to know your divine you" and talking about glorious infinite expression of oneself. Thank you