Capturing a Short Life: Losing Our Beautiful Babies (Family Documentary) | Real Stories

Capturing A Short Life is a beautifully photographed documentary film that combines verité and interview footage with still photography to detail the stories of four families who are dealing, in an immediate sense, with the loss of a newborn baby.
In a sensitive, intimate manner, this film explores the emotional, medical and ethical choices that parents are often faced with when they are told that their baby is incompatible with life.
Although this subject matter is impossibly sad, the lives and relationships that evolve, even in this context, are not. This is not a film about death, it is, rather, a story about how critical it is to remember and celebrate the lives of these beautiful babies who are only with us for a moment, and how impossible it is to forget them.
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Content licensed from [Hewitt Media Limited]. Any queries, please contact us at: [e-mail]

[@monicahyland8641]

I’m going to tell you something that I don’t talk about much, I had my son at 24.5 weeks and he had so many complications. He was only one pound. We were called up to the hospital at midnight one night and we were told he wasn’t going to make it through the night and Drs recommended we remove him from life support. I refused, he fought so hard for his life only for his intestines to rupture and his little lungs to collapse over and over. I still couldn’t take him off life support 😢. I felt so selfish. I just couldn’t do it. My son fought so hard for his life. By some miracle he pulled through the first hurdle ,on some days it was like 3 steps forward then 5 steps backward. Infection after infection,surgery after surgery,he pulled through. I’m so glad I didn’t listen to the doctors because he is here today,by some miracle. He just turned 19 and he is such a amazing kid,I don’t know how my life would have been if I would’ve listened to the doctors.

[@melanytodd2929]

🙏🙏🙏

[@OanhSchlesinger]

While reading your story I had a feeling it had a happy ending. No long-term complications is a miracle ❤️

[@wendywozniak6360]

All beautiful babies with such wonderful parents and families. This is so heartbreaking😢

[@deecates7715]

I went through a similar situation with my youngest child. (Our only son). I have lost 3 babies and have 3 biological living children and I also adopted a daughter. My oldest daughter I was pregnant with twins and lost 1. But my son I ended up in the hospital while pregnant and had been in the hospital for a week or so getting IV fluids and on bedrest and I had lost weight. I ended up having gallstones and had to have surgery and a few hours later my water broke and I ended up having emergency C-section and tubes tied. And I had this all at a small hospital that did not have a NICU. I had to be sedated for the emergency surgeries. I woke up after the C-section and my mom and husband said he was actually pretty good size for as early as he was. We knew his lungs were premature but he also had the cord in knot's and wrapped around his neck and he was bluish gray when they got him out. My husband and mom just got to get a very quick look at him and rushed him to another room. I have a sister who also was born with the cord around her neck and she is mentally handicapped from it and she was full term. But they had told us that we should contact a funeral home and I wasn't able to go to him or him to me for 48 hrs. But I refused to contact a funeral home and didn't listen to some of the things they were saying. Long story short he turned 30 this year . He did have some scary stuff in the first couple years and he had asthma but he is married and they have 4 kids. I have 12+ grandkids. My heart breaks for these parents and loved ones who lost their babies.

[@queenbee9785]

The doctors are not God , they aren’t always right!

[@zerinjannat]

My sister was born in 1990, she lived for only 4 days. But my parents never forget her birthday and the day she left. They still break down into tears. We mourn her till today and we always will.

[@Meao848]

My mom and dad lost a child at 18 months old. It doesn't matter if it is 18 min, 18 hrs, 18days orn18 months........the love of a parent ends when the parent passes and the loss of a child leaves a huge void. My dad was in his 80s and never stopped loving his first son!

[@zerinjannat]

@@Meao848 I am sorry for your and your parents' loss. I agree to what you say. There is this void always present and this question of : 'what if?' living in our minds. It wont ever disappear.

[@sheraria]

I was pregnant with twins. I miscarried one baby at 8 weeks gestation. The Dr or us did not know I had twins. They wanted to do a D&C. I said No, not before I have an ultrasound. The Dr was upset but let me have the US. He called my hospital room and said he was glad he didn't do the D&C bc there was one empty sac and one baby in there with a heartbeat. I was on bedrest until my water broke at 22 weeks. I asked for another US bc I knew my water had broke(We had a 4 and 5 year old) The Dr said no to the US😡. I started having contractions 4 weeks later so I went to ER who sent me to the OB ward and asked again for an US. Again the Dr said no. I said I am not leaving this hospital without one! You could see his little elbows and knees bc there was no fluid. It was so obvious there was no fluid. I was very tall and thin so you could see every lump and bump of baby parts. The Dr finally gave in and sent me down for an US. As soon as the tech put wand on my belly she said there is absolutely no fluid around this baby. I just lost it. Severe sadness(bc as a nurse I knew what this meant) and relief that I was right and not crazy or stupid like they tried to make me out to be. The Dr couldn't face me and called me on the radiology department phone and as I stood there in front of other patients in the lobby he told me.."There is not a drop of fluid around your baby. Baby's born this early almost always die. Come see me next week and I will send you to a specialist. " I thru the phone across the desk and ran to the lobby where my mom was with my girls and said we are leaving this place and never coming back here. I went that same day to the biggest hospital in our state. They didn't give us much hope. Said I had infection and was starting to dilate. They let me sleep ha the night and checked my blood in the morning and my white cell count had doubled and was getting septic. I was dilated to 1. They gave me no choice but induction or I would die of the infection. Definitely the hardest thing my husband and I have ever gone thru. It was in 1990 so no cell phones or any way to get pics of him. He only lived 2 hours after birth. Perfect except very underdeveloped lungs. There is still a whole in our hearts. He would be 34 this year. Every circumstance is different in infant loss and it is definitely not a club you ever want to be in! My heart goes out to all parents who have had to face this tradgedy 😢 Thoughts and prayers to you all!! Hindsight is always 20/20. But still everyone's circumstance and choices are different and none of them are wrong. Noone else has ever put on the shoes you had on when you had to make your choice for your reasons 😢. And people say the rudest and coldest things bc they are just trying to make conversation. Sometimes silence and just a hug is best. One family member of ours who was never married told us he would always say we had an abortion!😡 12 hours of labor on pitocin was the longest most painful 12 hours of my life! I wouldn't take any pain meds bc I knew that would slow his breathing. The nurses begged me but i refused. One nurse even said that she knew I tht he might live if I didnt take medicine. I would have always wondered if i would have. Hugs to everyone who has experienced this most painful feeling in the world. Leaving the hospital with "empty arms" was so very painful 😢

[@zerinjannat]

@@sheraria I am so sorry for your loss and your pain. You are a great mom! You fought for your baby and I salute you. To think your baby would have been 34 now! Its heartbreaking.

[@itsdanielleslife]

@@Meao848 I’m so so sorry that you lost a sibling at 18 months old. That’s so so sad. May I ask what happened? My daughter is almost 16 months and I feel like permanently terrified something will happen xx

[@knighttoking7926]

Losing a child, no matter how long they were here on Earth, is a trauma beyond description.

[@I-dont-give-a-shit777]

😂😂😂😂😆😆👎👎👎🤢

[@marygoff3332]

​@@I-dont-give-a-shit777go away and crawl back into your hole.

[@suzziezhills]

You’re so right . I cannot believe things some people will say. When my newborn son was in the NICU and we weren’t sure each day if he’d turn the bend or we’d get a middle of the night call that he was gone, I remember one particular person saying “well at least it isn’t (my 3 year old daughter)” I guess meaning it wouldn’t be near the loss since he was only a few days old. All I could think of was “you are a complete idiot” but it was meant I guess to make me feel better just in case. Sometimes a hug and no words is best.

[@nancyminui9108]

Letting go and letting God is the hardest but sometimes just praying that they will be relieved of their suffering and leaving the outcome up to God can bring the greatest peace. It is when we let go of our preconceived ideas about death and trust in the spiritual afterlife. Mourn for the loss of their physical presence realizing that the spirit lives on. For what is once loved can never die. They live on in our hearts❤

[@carolhanson8330]

I lost my beloved grandson whom I raised, in May of this year and he was with me for 20 years. My life will never be the same. I loved him so much.

[@shatteredshards8549]

To Christine, and all parents who lose a child, I hope you know that you are still 'mommy' and 'daddy' - your child no longer being with you does not change that.

[@CMoore8539]

That’s true.

[@user-et7yp5me6h]

❤️

[@loyaldogpublishingllc915]

What a beautiful thing to say❤

[@user-et7yp5me6h]

❤️❤️❤️

[@user-hk8tk7bp9m]

❤❤❤

[@kynaleemom]

As a mom who has been through this twice, this topic needs to be talked aboit more. People often forget our babies were here and lived and were so very loved.

[@NecrOphelia747]

I agree. I absolutely agree. 😢 my heart goes out to all of you.

[@michellesartori6695]

Please accept my sympathy for your losses! I am a mother, grandmother and a retired RN. I was a Childbirth Educator and I have always had an interest in fetal and maternal health and everything that surrounds this topic. I was also a Palliative Care nurse as well as working simultaneously in a Care Home for the profoundly disabled children in my community, but I have NEVER had the experience of loss which you have had. There is a KZbin channel called "Still A Part of Us" which hosts parents who have had a stillborn child or a neonatal death and the parents who started this channel, Winter and I've forgotten her husbands name, lost their son to a stillbirth and now offer a space where people like yourself can share the story of their experience of losing their child and hopefully this brings comfort and also awareness of how common infant death actually is. I have listened to many parents share their stories and it provides a way to ensure that people know that although their babies are no longer with them, they are still a part of theirfamilyforeverandtheirlife had meaning! I hope that you were helped properly when your babies were dying and given as much time as you wanted after they died to spend with them, and a box full of memories. Thanks for reading.

[@standup2982]

I'm so very sorry for your losses.

[@marciajones2993]

So very sorry for your losses. They’ll always be a very big part of you. Bless you all. Much love. 💙🩷

[@HypsyGyspy1467]

@@marciajones2993 I just read that when pregnant a part of the babies DNA ,is left with the mother.♥️They are always with you 🙏❤️

[@annefink7497]

Never question a parent with a dying child. It is their decision to make, what they believe is best for their child. Hugs to the families.

[@kristyw89]

I mean not always, there are people out there who do kill their children... Sometimes you DO have to question them.

[@user-sk2px6ox7m]

Think that one mother couldn’t handle a baby with massive needs she seemed unattached while the father looked devastated..too others grieve differently 😢❤

[@Moilacubaine]

@@user-sk2px6ox7mdon’t judge for what you see, you don’t know how people feel in the inside!

[@rainaa1997]

@@user-sk2px6ox7m just bc someone decides they can “handle” a child with special needs, doesn’t mean that every child should be forced to live a very hard and short life. This child was not going to live regardless. In this situation, as her doctors said, death was going to happen, this was an inevitable outcome.

[@suzziezhills]

My son was born with spinal meningitis and the contracted pneumonia. Within 12 hours they moved him to a NICU at another hospital. I didn’t understand newborns don’t get fevers. He was in very critical condition. They put me in a room on another floor with a woman whose baby died. My son was 24” long, 9 lbs and induced 2 weeks early. So looked big and strong compared to the preemies. For 3 weeks every day we were sure he’d die. Thank God he didn’t . Now he’s 43. It’s a miracle I celebrate daily but relive that trauma often.

[@psychonauty2020]

my baby also had a fever so soon after birth due to complications of the cesarean surgery he is a miracle

[@Alexandra-dy2ns]

I'm so glad your son survived. It moves me that you're speaking of a trauma and I can fully relate to it. My baby boy was sixteen months when he contracted sepsis in a hospital and showed several extremely scary symptoms. He made a full recovery, but if it comes to sepsis, every minute counts and I really had to pressure the doctors to find out what was wrong. I never can not think of it when we have the same time of the year again. It gives me goosebumps to think what might have happened had I not insisted doctors give me a diagnosis and instead just waited as they had suggested. Thank you for sharing your story, I've always shied away from calling myself traumatised because my boy regained health but I know now for sure that it is a trauma.

[@kimtillman5683]

Newborn baby’s do get fevers and when they do you should seek medical attention for your baby right away…I’m not sure why you are saying that newborn’s do not get fevers but that is completely untrue maybe you mean not all newborns that get sick get a fever which that can be true with every age

[@suzziezhills]

@@kimtillman5683 the NICU docs said - in response to my “normal” reaction cuz I had a 3 yr old that oh little kids DO get fevers, right? - that normal newborns do not. My son was on NICU for almost a month in “very critical condition “ and almost died . I believe what they told me.

[@kimtillman5683]

@@suzziezhillsI see I’m only commenting because my son was a “normal” baby when I brought him home 2 days after he was born he started to run a fever I took him to the ER they did a spinal tap he had caught strep B (the docs said he must have caught it in the delivery room because I did not have strep B) which at that time he was placed in quarantine,strep B can turn into spinal meningitis thank God we caught this when we did anyways 14 days later we went home… but I still think you misunderstood what the doctor told you all “normal” newborn baby’s can run a fever and if they do should be brought in to see a doctor anyways it’s very easy to find out information on your strange information you received from that doctor or that you misinterpreted what he said you can easily find out again that all “normal” newborns could run a fever if they are ill I think you spreading such information and totally even denying the fact there is a possibility you misunderstood or are remembering things differently as it’s been many years that spreading such false dangerous info on the internet could reach just one person that is hard of learning & decides what you have said means her newborn that has a fever is not normal …. again you should educate yourself again on what you are saying that newborns with fevers are not normal because that is not true at all

[@christinapaul7069]

My son died at 49. So unexpected. Nearly miscarried him and always smiled to see him grow into a handsome man. He's been gone 8 years today. You never get over it.

[@user-iy7hq6gg7v]

Stay strong my precious. Remember you are still a mommy and a great one at that. Praying for you my angel. Much love 💕

[@jugoldman2230]

I'm so sorry for all those who have lost a child. whatever age, it's a terrible thing for a parent to have to go through.

[@barbaragonder1889]

I'm so sorry...

[@_Z0YA_COOKS]

At 49 y old? But you have him 49 y live and well. I'd be grateful.

[@gerriclyatt8221]

I know you always see him as a little child, growing up into a handsome kind and loving young man. One day you and I will see our children again.

[@vegascece]

I'm Grandma. Not only do we watch our grand baby go though the trauma of all the tests, surgeries and procedures, we watch our adult daughter and her family go though the stress, trauma, and pain of watching their child not living as she should. And then, just shy of 6 months, not ever having a chance to go home, something totally unexpected happens and life ceases. The memories remain but those left behind are forever changed.

[@karenwelsh1705]

Absolutely, I am a Nana now (to quite a few for over 8 years old) I still feel for my Mum, she was so in love with her 2nd grandson (my second child who died at 5 mths of age) but barely got any acknowledgement or sympathy or support when she lost her precious Grandson who she spent time with almost every day with. She used to call Calem "sneaky heat" as because of his heart failure he would always roll toward the heater because he was always cold. Thank you for loving him so much Mum.

[@vegascece]

@@karenwelsh1705 It's truly a tragedy we cannot stop or change the outcome and it's always the living that continue to suffer/mourn the loss of what I call "the missing branch" (family tree). My daughter also lost one of her twins at birth so she watches her now 14 year old son and always wonders. She also lost her almost 6 month old who was born premature. Brother and sister are buried right next to each other so it gives her comfort to know that in death, her babies have each other.

[@PlatinumIrishrose]

❤ Thank you for your story and loving us enough to share your talents. Nurse hero.❤

[@starxrender]

Found Kayla's parents on social media, happy to report among all this sadness she is now a beautiful, happy teenager!

[@lkm3s]

This is what I was looking for! Thanks for the update.

[@Jojo-gg6jc]

It broke my heart when the big brother told his dad, don't worry she's still here, what a sweet boy, you can see he's going to be a great big brother.🙏💙🙏

[@stephaniedavis6531]

...out of the mouths-of-babes

[@kimma508]

Very wise big brother.

[@FullFrontalFromage]

I thought that was one of the sweetest things I’ve ever heard. A young son knowing how to comfort his dad.

[@mariajesusramos469]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤😢😢😢😢😢😢

[@kathykaybaconcarlson1476]

I’m totally touched by this treatment of babies dying. On August 13,1969 I had a Stillborn daughter,they threw a rag over her and put her aside. I sat up begging for her and I was shoved down and held me down from seeking my baby, I begged for her to hold her,kiss her all the usual things a new mother does! I pleaded till I was exhausted. No one did one thing to grant my requests, I wanted pictures. The treatment throughout my stay was appalling! It was medical maltreatment! In September 1986 I lost a son who died of SIDS 26 days old. The years since we lost his sister,Katherine Kubler Ross wrote book on stages of grief and changed the way people think about death, mourning & grief. Infant deaths have a cold cot ( bassinet with cooler ), giving parents more time to spend with their baby. This helps my heart heal. My Prayers are being answered. And please thank those photographers who so lovingly gave those parents memories I wasn’t allowed to have. God Bless Compassionate People that have the ability to go where Angels have trouble going to! Thank you for listening to a Mother’s heart!

[@CLEFT3000]

❤ thank you for sharing

[@user-hw3kg3xs4f]

I was born on August 13, 1969. I'm so sorry that you had to bear so much pain and loss. I'd like to think that she could have children and grandchildren as I do. Thank you for sharing your stories.

[@ucanleaveyourhaton]

My heart broke as I read your story. What an atrocity it was, that you suffered the way you did ! I wish I knew what to say to you, but it all seems like cliches. Damed doctors ! Damed nurses ! What an awful era to have had to live through. I’m so glad we’ve evolved past that kind of hellish treatment of grieving mothers. Thank you Dr Elisabeth Kübler Ross 🙏❤️. I want to tell you… If I had been there with you as your daughter passed, I would’ve gently picked up your beautiful baby and wrapped her in a blanket, told her how beautiful she was and handed her to you. You would’ve been able to hold her for as long as you needed to. If you had no one there to comfort you, I would’ve sat with you so you didn’t have to be alone. We would’ve celebrated her birth, her short life, together. She was a unique person in her own right, not someone to be cast aside. Just because her life was lived, cocooned inside your body, doesn’t make it one little bit less important than if she’d been living outside of you. May you be blessed 🌈❤️. Leonie in Australia

[@laramaaike3050]

My grandmom lost her son after birth and no one let her see him. Her husband did the funeral things and even he didn't want her to look at him. Not neccesary. She gave birth to another son after having 3 girls and she named him the same as her first son (a small burden for the son, who is my dad) But she could never forget her first son. She blamed her husband for it, he died and after that she told all of us the story and how she was still grieving. I am so glad things are different now.

[@iloveschicken6527]

Prayers for you! 😢

[@basicxwitch6689]

We lost my niece to a rare genetic disorder at a yr and 26 days. Took her off support on her 1st bday...she lives 26 beautiful days in hospice. She made me believe in angels.

[@georgiareddirtroad9919]

Unfortunately I have witnessed this 1st hand. My niece found out that her baby girl was going to be born with severe poly cystic kidney disease. She arrived on her due date. She was beautiful, a head full of thick dark hair, perfect little angel on the outside but on the inside her kidneys were so enlarged that her lungs had no room to develop. She never made a sound, never open those precious eyes, just gasped for air like a fish out of water… her sweet soul left that precious little body about 45 minutes after being born. It was an experience I shall never forget, nor shall I never forget her. Her short time on earth left me in tears, in sadness, wondering why these things happen to such innocence. We as humans naturally question these situations, the only peace we have is knowing these babies are resting in glory with our Lord Jesus Christ…

[@michellesartori6695]

I completely agree with you, Georgia, and please accept my sympathy for the loss of your neice. I was an RN for many years and I worked mostly in the area of Palliative Care as well as simultaneously working with profoundly disabled children in a local Care Home. I I was also a Childbirth Educator and I went into nursing to become a Midwife but, due to being born with a dislocated hip and knowing that as I got older I would suffer with arthritis, I decided that I wasn't going to be able to get down on the floor with someone who wanted to give birth in that position and it would be unfair of me to become a Midwife for that sole reason. I am a mother of 5 and a grandmother of one now adult grandson, but I have many grandchildren in Heaven with these babies, safe with Jesus. As a Christian, I long for Heaven and to see my granddaughters and grandson's who, through miscarriage and abortion, are not here now. I am very sorry about the death of your neice. Babies just aren't supposed to die, but unfortunately, the rare of miscarriage, fetal demis, and neonatal death are increasing, NOT decreasing, and the US has the worst rates in the industrialised world. I live in Australia and our mortality rates are also increasing as well as infertility rates. I wonder if there will be a day that mirrors the movie "Children of Men"? It is heartbreaking when pregnant couples who are eagerly awaiting the birth of their baby are then told that their children won't make it, but I am grateful that parents and other family members can have an opportunity to be with that baby even after death and create memories that will remind them of the child they lost. There's a KZbin channel called "Still A Part of Us" which was started by 2 parents who had a stillborn son and they offer a space where bereaved parents can come on and share the experience of losing their baby that died due to either a stillbirth or neonatal death. I have nothing to do with the channel BTW except to say that I have listened to many parents stories and perhaps your neice might gain some comfort from listening to other parents who have suffered a similar loss and maybe down the track she might want to share about her own daughter. It's just a suggestion. Take care now and thank you for sharing.

[@sarahalbers5555]

So utterly heartbreaking. I have no words.

[@aliciadavis5466]

I lost my newborn son to PKD 29 years ago and it may as well have been yesterday.

[@leojs5673]

jesus christ ain’t real honey

[@georgiareddirtroad9919]

@@leojs5673 We all choose what and who to believe in-Jesus is mine- I won’t preach to you other than to say please do not criticize my beliefs as I won’t criticize yours. 😌

[@amyspeers8012]

I was a NICU nurse for 7 years in the 1990’s. I have so many memories of the families and babies I cared for. For some reason, or call it a gift, I was really good at having difficult conversations, to help families get answers they needed to make those hard decisions. I celebrated with families as they took babies home and helped families grieve when a baby died. I have saved the notes and letters and cards I was given and have stayed in touch with 2 families.

[@FullFrontalFromage]

Beautiful. Thank you for sharing this and for being a comfort to parents in need.

[@nancy-katharynmcgraw2669]

I worked jn 2 different NICU'S in lower Michigan in the early 1980's. I was blessed for the memories and the unconditional love given to these babies & each other...I, too, knew caring for these babies & family that did visit was a gift that I still treasure, now 45 years later.

[@wendyalexander1893]

I so appreciate this photographer and her organization. They’ve captured life and death of their babies.

[@KassieDavid]

@45:57 I felt the same. Everything she said is how I felt after my daughter passed away. Life goes on for everyone else. You never get over it. Very emotional. 💜

[@Golightly354]

I too lost a child when he was 18 days. it ruined my life. My 2 older sons also had 32mhalf brothers stillborn when they were only 12 and 13 years old. Every Christmas, they visited the graves of their 3 deceased brothers. Although I was distraught, young siblings suffer so much and their suffering is not really acknowledged. It has affected their lives when their wives were expecting babies. It was traumatic for them.

[@KassieDavid]

@@Golightly354 I'm sorry for your loss! It ruined me to. The grief process is different for everyone. I held onto the pain for a long time. My daughter was a twin and my daughter that passed was 2 years old so it was very hard for her sister so I under your feelings.

[@ginagelia2880]

I’m so sorry!!!!!💔💔💔💔

[@ambermcfalls2464]

I love how the dad sits with his son and talks about his baby sister in a very positive way ❤

[@ClearwaterKB]

I have worked as a pediatric hospice nurse and a pediatric vent/trach home care nurse. I have witness the miracle babies, the ones who die shortly after birth and the ones who survive with no quality of life. My own child was in the NICU and it is a wonderful place, sometimes I feel that just because we can, doesn't mean we should. When all a baby knows is pain from procedures, infections and surgeries I ask myself if this is medicine (healing) or not.

[@allysonh6410]

AMEN

[@user-sk2px6ox7m]

💯

[@martinasikk6162]

What a thoughtful story, with your experience. There are so many stories. We parents and hospital staff never know for sure. Best wishes from Sweden. 🌹

[@katlady6686]

Having been a pediatric nurse working on an infant floor we often received children who graduated from NICU that still needed care or were frequent flyers that were previous NICU babies. I also have worked in the NICU as well. I do agree with you about just because we can, doesn't mean we always should when it comes to the care of these premature babies especially the extremely premature ones.

[@Michele-cro-jo]

As a nurse, I agree. You know every parent wants their child to live. They often do not understand or have the strength to make such a monumental decision. I also believe sometimes doctors can be overly interested in taking extraordinary measures just to see if they can. I'm not saying they are callous, though some are. It is just in the backs of their minds to save them for statistics, science, medical history...

[@pallaszina]

Thank you to the families who agreed to be a part of this video. It's a brave move and a big one. It's also necessary for the rest of us to be made aware. This could happen to any of us in various capacities.

[@bbj4613]

This is the most heart breaking thing ever that a human can endure. RIP to all the beautiful babies, may you all be transported to a life where there is no pain, no suffering. I’m 38 weeks pregnant and I already love my daughter more than anything in this world.

[@pomnii2]

Has she been born yet 🥺

[@bbj4613]

@@pomnii2 hey I’m 39 weeks 1 day now and no sign yet 😭

[@pomnii2]

@@bbj4613 it’s still early, good luck :) I was born a week early because it was firework night haha

[@lisabeaver2919]

Good luck , wish you a safe and fast labor ..please let us know when she's here .❤

[@bonniebonbasa3257]

We love our babies before we could even conceive... my dolls were my babies till I had my sons.

[@user-ts3mi4zk2n]

I lost 4 children to miscarriage. I lost them early in my pregnancy but they were as alive to me as any other child could be. The callousness of the medical people , even family was nearly the tipping point for me. Even now all those years since, my heart still aches , I could barely get through this video. I'm glad that grief teams and support groups are now available for parents like me. I did name my children, something everyone thought i was crazy for doing years ago. I'm so glad I did. Now in my sixty and preparing for my own time of passing, My husband and I have put all their names on our grave stone. Forever to rest with their mom and dad in spirit until we're all together again. Much love to all of you who will and are walking this road of tears...❤

[@lisahawes6934]

❤❤

[@user-ts3mi4zk2n]

@lisahawes6934 Thank You...

[@louisianna5524]

I had a stillborn at 20 weeks gave birth to him in our toilet, his name is Joel and we donated him to Science, I have had many more miscarriages but I'm a Mother to 3 Miracles, all in their 30s and 4 grandchildren I think about my little loves that are not here every single day.. Sending hugs to you xoxo ❤

[@nancysmith2295]

43 years ago was my baby's first day home from the hospital. He was 7 days in NICU and 3 in the regular nursery to make sure I could truly breast feed him. I saw many other parents who had their baby fighting more complicated problems. I saw some die. My son had sepsis. A heart murmur. A blood transfusion. IV antibiotics. IV's are through the head for the largest vein. He was 8 months. 4lbs. 6ozs. I had contracted rubella at a polluted beach at 7 months (I did not see the warning signs at the beach). The titer showed an increase, but because I was past 6 months they assumed the pregnancy would progress normally. He is 43 years old. A father with three adult children. I prayed so much for him. I prayed for all the babies and parents. Those first few days we're all in the same boat. I am amazed every day because he survived.

[@marjoriesmith6841]

I gave birth to twins at 24 weeks weighing 23 and 26oz they are now 24 years old and you would never know how hard they had to fight to be here. I was 1 of the lucky ones and I was blessed with 2 miracle babies My heart breaks for the parents who didn't have the same outcome 💔

[@candilease938]

11:49 bless her heart! Wiping the dad’s nose for him! This is amazing for her to donate her time and her talents to do this for grieving families! To gift them these beautiful memories of their beautiful babies! I hope she knows how meaningful it is! And how appreciated she is! ❤❤❤

[@sherry8894]

EVERY BABY MATTERS! 💗💜💗😊 These photos are amazing! The parents deserve to have memories of their babies and something they can treasure forever...

[@drintx5734]

My son died at 25 years old. You do move through the grief and will get to the other side of it. It takes time. You aren’t the same person at the end as you were at the beginning. The wound heals but stays tender. Draw close to Jesus. It’s hard to believe, but you will laugh again, love again and live again.

[@jc2385]

What an amazing photographer. Such a loving way to give of her talents. ❤️

[@lisabeaver2919]

It is . I've been hearing about this company ' Now I lay me down to sleep'. From what I read they give their service for free to parents of stillborn babies .

[@20PINKluvr]

Kinda offensive of her to be pregnant herself while these mothers are losing their babies.

[@Jw-cb5se]

My heart mourns with these families.

[@ipacarrollread]

Watching these videos is so hard and I wonder sometimes why I do it but there are many people whose pain is never acknowledged. I think these babies, their families, these parents all deserve to be seen. Everyone gave me sympathy for a week when I lost my babies mid pregnancy then they moved on. I didn’t.

[@karenwelsh1705]

There are still someone, like me who has never met you that will feel deeply for the loss of your babies, as was what said, we as parents should never have to bury our babies, I am so sorry for you losses, your perfect little angels

[@ReginaPinkston-hl8zg]

You were great parents! She is NOT mad at you - she is in heaven and YOU will see her again!

[@AnnaMorris411]

Must never forget we aren’t guaranteed to have life beyond this moment even in the womb! Cherish every second…

[@carolmiller8310]

Thanks Anna. Nice words❤.Bless you. Love Carol. In. THE UK

[@berlingolingoful]

"You want your kid to cry in your own arms". ❤

[@doreenbrownlie771]

To all the Mum’s,Dad’s , significant others and extended family members. I’m so sorry for your loss. I thank you for sharing your heartbreaking, but beautiful stories. The love you have for your sweet babies is the shining light of this documentary.

[@lms1068]

I'm a mama of 1 live birth and 6 babies that have miscarried. The pain doesn't leave.

[@aris5703]

I was a 24 wk micro preemie only weighing 1lb 9oz. I have a identical twin sister we both just turned 20 in July 😊❤

[@jeanninereynolds4989]

It took so much courage for these parents to share this. I have spent a lot of time at sick kids hospital and am so grateful for the amazing care we as a family received

[@bomblilkitty]

I just wanted to commend the producers for doing such a beautiful job with such a tragic subject and commend all the parents for their remarkable bravery.

[@trishamartin9023]

I was told to terminate my son due to complications of the pregnancy. They kept telling me the pregnancy wasnt viable due to my health. We fought for him and hes a healthy little boy today. They said his lungs would be severely under developed due to lack of fluid. However when he arrived at 35 weeks he breathed on his own. Spent 2 weeks in the hospital and had one surgery at 6 months and one at 6 years. But hes a lovely little boy. Very smart and great at sports. Incredibly sweet.

[@kasiestockdall2954]

It is truly one of the hardest things to go through. I lost my son on September 28th, 2011, and it still hurts. I hope all of these parents are doing better now.

[@ilageis1541]

Our hearts go out to you and your family. Always and forever...

[@suzziezhills]

So so sorry. It will never go away.

[@tictactoe325]

@@suzziezhills I lost my little one in 1984. It’s taken years to heal from the pain, but now that I’m turning 60 in a few days, I realise that now I’m at peace with the loss of my little one. I look forward to meeting them in heaven.

[@nancysmith2295]

In the NICU other parents know there are other sick babies. Some survive. Some die. You know when one died intuitively. You may not know, but the other NICU parents mourned your loss too. I know I prayed 🙏 for all the babies. We learn so much. I am very compassionate. (My son survived. He turned 43 a few days ago.)

[@rsmith8434]

@@tictactoe325 Very sorry for your loss. I hope you are doing ok.

[@user-qv2es3kq1r]

I lost my son in 1989, he lived only two days. If it weren’t for the NICU nurses I wouldn’t have any pictures of my son. He was born with a heart defect and coded during open heart surgery. Forever in my heart. Preston Levi 6/26/89-6/28/89

[@CatsArePeopleToo]

❤

[@bienveillance972]

One day, you will see your baby boy again. He's in Heaven. and that day, no one and nothing will separate you anymore. Forgive me, I'm french so I may be make mistakes in my english.

[@jeanhargis7333]

These babies were so loved! They had what so many other children never enjoy…the unconditional love of both parents and their siblings. Thank you each for loving that child as long as you could no matter what!

[@meganbeckett5627]

Like that one mom said u never get over the loss of a child u just learn how to live with the pain.. i lost my second born daughter in 2009 to SIDS and it still hurts to this day...

[@kamranahmed5940]

❤

[@karenwelsh1705]

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious and obviously very loved wee daughter

[@mael2039]

The tears didn't start coming until the sweet older brother of Kayla told his mum that he wants her to survive. I loved how the parents talked to their older children about this. They're living this loss, too. And it's so important to help them understand as best as we can and help them with their grief. How we explain and talk to our kids when they experience such a heartbreaking loss is so important. And it's so incredibly difficult when you as the parents are also going through the most difficult time of your life, but it's so important.

[@kristinaslade-pearson9167]

Although this was a very difficult video to watch, it shows the compassion of the doctors and especially the nurses. I have a son born with Spina Bifida and spent months in the Children’s Hospital in Boston NICU . You build bonds with other parents knowing most of the babies will die In some ways you help each other. Bless you all

[@nancyminui9108]

I used to work with adults with developmental disabilities. Some of them were severely affected both physically and mentally, while some of them only had mild impairment and were considered high functioning. I worked with the later type first. These individuals were such a joy to work with as they achieved their goals towards living independently and maximizing their potential. It was so much harder to work with the severely impaired. Their bodies contorted in painful submission, there were times I could only hope that they were unaware of their circumstances. We provided sustenance through tube feedings and cared for their bodily needs. I remember at times wondering about God's grace in allowing them to continue to exist day after day year after year. It appalled me to see them cared for at times by neglectful and even abusive caregivers who did the job only to make as much money as they would in a fast food restaurant but in a home like institutional environment where they could sit back and relax oblivious to their charges needs. These were the helpless individuals that we see here as babies, if in God's wisdom they had continued to live instead of peacefully transitioning to the spiritual afterlife. I can't help but think that in a way these babies are the lucky ones.🕊

[@hollyhal1254]

Angelica Monette Hall 9-23-93. That was our fear, why we made the decision we did. We couldn’t bring ourselves to put her through pain and trauma for no quality of life. But we got so little time to think about it though. It was nothing like this, we didn’t get to spend more than a couple of minutes with her before she was gone, and none after because we chose to donate any usable organs. I will go to my grave wondering if we made the right decision.

[@hollyhal1254]

For Angelica Hall, she was a full term baby born with previously unknown birth defects.

[@samanthahill9367]

​@@hollyhal1254Mother's knows best. You have that instinct, it's your child. You did the right thing. We want them to live for us, but sometimes love is proved in letting go.

[@user-sk2px6ox7m]

Agreed

[@ToeIn2194]

The disabled people you cared for had a right to life, its the system that's broken, not the disabled individuals. We need a system that values disabled life.

[@kirstenornelas881]

My first was brought back twice, once in the operating room, again in NICU while I was in the OR fighting for my own life at that point. After everything I developed a fever. I had spent two weeks in labor and baby went into distress at 28 weeks. I will never forget signing the papers yes I want them to resuscitate. Because we knew due to the medications I was given and the quickness with which the hr dropped and had been at 22bpm for over 45 min that baby wouldn’t be breathing, I heard no cry, I didn’t even get to see my little one. Ten hours later I got a grainy photo of this tiny little thing with tubes and things everywhere. And the smallest footprints you’ve ever seen. I heard the phrase “your baby might not survive through the night” so many times I lost count. At some point I made the promise that as long as my baby was fighting so would I. My tiny peanut is an A student, is amazing and here and turning twenty in the spring. We’ve got other issues due to genetic conditions that weren’t even DX until my child was 14 and so we still cope with the knowledge that we’re looking at the very real possibility that we will outlive our oldest child. I’m glad they did the C section because we found out an extremely short umbilical cord found during the c section would have meant death had we attempted a vaginal delivery. Thankfully baby was sideways and never turned right side up or down and that saved us partially and the most amazing surgeon and medical teams did the rest and our fight helped a lot. We nearly lost our child again due to sepsis developed quickly after kidney stones two years ago just days before turning 17. In fact my kiddo was released from the hospital on their birthday and we threw together a birthday and it was not what was planned but it meant so much because that first night was so bad they didn’t think I would be taking her home. I have family and friends who have lost infants. One to sids, another to a rare heart defect, one to a rare birth accident and another to the ego of a piratical not on the team at all who decided to give something to a five month old who had survived the worst of meningococcal meningitis and was supposed to be going home. Instead his intervention took her life within two hrs. He was never meant to be anywhere near her. 😢. This breaks my heart I met so many moms while in NICU with my own and so many who went through the most unimaginable choices. Many who got to bring their babies home and so many who didn’t. Many who’s babies thrived and broke all the expectations and others who never were the same and able to run and play the way they were meant to the way we all hope our littles will get to be I guess is better way to put it. The best way to explain NICU is it is a rollercoaster. You don’t plan past that moment, that second and you don’t think about when do we go home you think about when I get back from dinner what will my baby be doing? Will they still be stable. One moment they are just fine then suddenly every alarm is blaring and suddenly there’s the entire team and you’re signing papers and being rushed away and taking that extra long look hoping it isn’t the last time you get to see them. I met my first when she was 48 hrs old and it was a mix of feelings I don’t think I’ll ever be able to explain fully. I was scared and happy and terrified and so in love with this tiny little peanut. I was afraid to touch her and wanted to fold her tight and afraid that anything I did would be wrong but wanting so badly to hold her and love her and be able to be her mom. You feel like you are watching the grass grow on the good days and on the days when everything is going south you’re just trying to remind yourself to breath. I feel so much for these families and wish I could take all of this pain away and wish there was a way to fix every baby. No parents should have to see their little one go before they do. ❤

[@vernakooy501]

My 23w6d old micropreemie son was born at 1lb 9oz. I was.told there's no hope. He is now 32 years old and about to be a father.

[@spiltsoymilk]

I was born the exact same gestational age two ounces bigger than your son almost 44 years ago. I have very few complications considering all I went through, including a brain bleed.

[@vernakooy501]

@@spiltsoymilk that's awesome.

[@GW-gz8jh]

I think it’s wonderful but I think people also need to understand that your child was an exception and not the standard. Hope is essential. False hope is cruel.

[@vickythefist7062]

Wow the twins !! Her brother was right SHE'S STILL HERE THERE'S STILL HOPE . GOD HEARD THEIR PRAYERS i really hope the family are doing well today. At least there was one happy ending . Very ssd documentary 😢😢

[@MultiZoobie]

I didn't get what was wrong with the little twin girl? Can you tell me?

[@fireflychick1984]

@@MultiZoobie Meningitis caused her permanent brain damage. :(

[@user-et2wi5et8e]

She is a joy her smile is contagious! Her little teeth ❤❤❤

[@kindnessmatters4068]

What doctors told them and what God showed them was definitely not the same ending 😊❤

[@Heavyisthecrown]

She lived and is a teenager!

[@daisygirlsqueeker4146]

Im so sorry for the grief these families suffer.

[@angieburns6241]

My heart broke for these parents. I watched my still born nephew come into the world. We knew prior to the birth that he had gone. It was a blood clot in the cord. He was a super tiny 26 weeker. That's a pain that never goes away no matter how many years have passed. It was a great surprise to see little Kayla at the end. An update now would be good. I know this documentary is a little older.

[@LeeLeeCRN]

Same EXACT thing happened with my stepsis. At 36wks she stopped feeling the baby move. It was her 1st baby n she was only 20. She was induced n delivered her. She looked absolutely perfect..just like she was sleeping. She ended up having a healthy baby girl 2yrs later. We were actually pregnant at the same time n had our babies 4months apart. She was monitored super close the 2nd pregnancy n was on heparin shots. So sry for your loss

[@fruitypie3219]

❤ My heart goes out to all of you ❤️ my daughter was born poorly and passed away age 3 months. I never got to bring her home. Thank you for being so brave in sharing ❤❤🙏

[@karenwelsh1705]

oh my gosh, I just ended up in another flood of tears, I hope you still have all the love and support around you that you need, RIP baby girl.

[@magicfairy7805]

God bless the photographers. Those pictures are SO important.

[@katlady6686]

I agree totally! When I worked in the NICU, we often would take pictures of the babies even if the parents didn't want them at that time. Parents often come back later wishing they had taken pictures. We also have volunteers that make little outfits for children that pass away.

[@vikkismith7497]

To loose a baby is like loosing a grown person, because it's a life as well.

[@74Spirit1]

My mother endured losing a baby and raising his surviving brother. My brother has outlived his twin for nearly 57 years.

[@Jeanine-ez6ur]

NOAH..I REMEMBER AND LOVE YOU..MARCH 13. 2010 I KNOW YOU LIVE ON❤

[@jmat5857]

Kayla’s baptism was so precious.

[@LisaW509]

RIP Angel babies! Gone but never forgotten. 😢

[@georgiavarnum8069]

You were so blessed to have delivered a living child. You got to hold it , tell them how much you loved them and be mommie and daddy even if only for a short precious time. You are very loving, selfless, and strong. One day you will all be together again. May God bless you and keep you until that day.

[@carerschoice]

This world was never meant for one as beautiful as you 💔💐 RIP beautiful xx

[@maehaughan2267]

My son said nearly the same thing……”he was too perfect for this world”. God bless you!

[@debbiemurrell3632]

I feel so bad for you. The loss of a child is the worse thing ever. I know, I lost my baby boy at 7 months old. It's not something you ever get over.😢😢

[@rebeccarawlinson5858]

16 years ago October I lost my little butterfly 🦋 it still hurts so deeply God bless all these angels who have gained their wings love be with you all ❤❤

[@kristensorensen2219]

Thanks to everyone that made this possible; for sharing a super important time in your lives with so many that now see how prescious life is for each of us.

[@susieeverett7870]

This video was beautiful and so respectful to the families whose stories were shared. Thank you…

[@SarahLittle-wk6oo]

I am 43, no kids by choice. I don’t have the instincts. As a person usually unmoved by parenthood, I was surprised to find myself crying along with these parents. I’m a nurse and I see death more than I care to admit, but I work with the elderly. these conversations about end of life come often, it’s a part of the job but my patients lived full lives. Regardless of age, The families struggle with the decision of allowing their loved one to die. The guilt is debilitating for them. Losing babies is infinitely more difficult and requires an entirely different skill set than geriatrics. Thank you for sharing.

[@Razzilou]

Thank you so much. My first child, Maggie, lived for 48 days 47 years ago. I think of her every day, miss her, love her. Your film is such a perfect depiction of the profound, complete attachment and love that thrives between newborns whose lives will be as brief as a breeze and parents who long to love them through all of many thousands of days…. You are a gift!

[@TaraMac1437]

Oh my god to see Kayla at the end THRIVING! She seemed a bit more advanced than her twin even!! Yay Kayla!!! 🎉❤

[@brooklynfinest842]

Never felt pain in my life until my niece passed away seeing my sister so broken is not something I can wish on anyone 😢she left us two children for her brother to raise and 5 years later it still feels like it just happen yesterday

[@sabrinabowden-hughes1730]

So sorry for ur loss! God comfort u and may he give u strength!

[@sapphirerain70]

This was so sad and hard to watch. My mom, who passed almost 10 years now, had a miscarriage, a stillborn and a baby boy who died of SIDS. I can’t imagine the pain she went through. I don’t think I would have the courage to try again, but she did. I was born at 7 months and the doctors told her they didn’t think I would live. This was 1970. I made it and I have two wonderful brothers, and three kids of my own. My son is named after one of my brothers who passed. I hope I get to meet them someday😢

[@samanthahill9367]

Yor mom must have been 1 very strong lady. Never giving up, moving forward and making the most of it.

[@ambervallerio2816]

This child would be 16 if they were to live in 2023. This is so very sad for all these babies and the families. My heart breaks for all of them. They are now angels dancing in heaven with all the other babies ❤️

[@janecarver9672]

Thankyou for sharing with us how you made your babies lives enriched and meaningful in the short times you had with them.

[@ellencrooks7624]

I’m watching this with tears rolling down my face on what would of been my little sister’s 39th birthday, she passed away at 10 months of age.

[@RandomComment6]

What beautiful babies. May they all rest in Paradise. My sincere condolences to all of the parents and families. Thank you for sharing your heart wrenching experiences with the rest of us. Your strength is an inspiration.

[@tracycook7355]

These parents were so brave sharing the stories of their precious babies.

[@theresa42213]

''She felt the sun on her face, and the wind too. ...She liked that'' Much love to all the people in this documentary.

[@CATNAPREAL1188]

When that Momma said that She truly expressed what a wonderful Momma she was to her daughter ! Great Job sweetie and I'm So Sorry for Your Loss !

[@lindsayatkinsonfromu.k3492]

Absolutely heartbreaking! There are no words 💔

[@tamibell4325]

This was a beautiful and heartbreaking documentary. I am so sorry for the parents losses. I know how devastating it is. Please know that your babies are with God! He is taking care of them. Though any words cannot ease your pain and grief I pray that your hearts be filled with love and peace. The photos were done with such loving care. Truly a blessing to have those photos and hands and feet plasters. Sending you all so much love and prayers!💝🙏❤💔

[@sophiabright8371]

A very beautiful film. Thank you for the generosity.

[@synappticuser7296]

All that love, so much love, completely filling every moment of each child's short life. Love totally expressed, holding everyone present, nothing withheld. A moment of total presence and awareness, that will never be forgotten. That's the sort of love we all need!

[@wendisokira2198]

God bless these families & thank you for sharing your journey.

[@alexandrajohnson886]

Precious … so many families can relate… we go forward and help those that may need us through our own experiences of loss… that is part of the healing …

[@aileenmccarthy8660]

Those nurses are some of the strongest souls...seeing the most gut wrenching pain of the family/parents and the suffering of innocent children, multiple times a day, everyday, for years. Without breaking down while seeing first hand the anguish and raw grief of the family/parents. I’d be bawling my eyes out with them.

[@aliciadavis5466]

There are many drives home in tears.

[@corid1897]

That photographer is an angel! What a blessing to have these images to cherish. Life is short, we have to capture the moments of love so we can hold them close to us and even if the images are painful and cant be looked at for a while - there may be a time when it will offer comfort and legitimacy to a short life full of meaning. There is such a thing as a good death and I commend these parents for putting the wellbeing of their child over their own pain.

[@carolkontur1442]

A greater pain I can not imagine than losing a child! Condolences to all!

[@melyndacorley2150]

I had my second son at 28 weeks, and he was in the NICU for 150 days. He was 2 lbs. He is now 14, and he's in 8th grade . I will be praying for you guys ❤

[@stillhere1425]

Lydia is such a beautiful baby, too. You cannot believe she’s less than perfect.

[@claudiarobinson587]

The nurses are amazing that deals with the babies and families. Thank you nurses.

[@Jo-eh7ux]

That was really hard to watch.. as a mother with now a 22 year old son I can't comprehend how heart breaking it would be.. I'm so sorry for your loss of your beautiful souls 🫂

[@andersonsglenn]

My first son was born at 29 weeks weighing 5 lbs and 14 oz. I was 19 and knew nothing about a sick child. I was told by staff how sick he was but I. Didn’t hear what they were saying . He lived 8 days. I do not have any pictures , nothing tangible but my memories.

[@AB-by8xu]

The average weight for 29 weeks is about 2.5 pounds ?!

[@sallymccoy6286]

Thank you to the parents of their beloved babies that passed away. So, sorry for your loss.

[@lynnwalters4801]

These brave parents need a place in the world. Never forget. Never Give up💜

[@HannahLuckenbaugh]

Our baby was born at 27 weeks she was on a respirator 4 days she is beautiful she is 31 and perfect it wasn’t easy road but l had preeclampsia and Kensley is a barber and a miracle my heart goes out to these parents gods bless you’ll am praying for you all we were that miracle

[@alanacoker7412]

My dear Mum lost 3 babies before i was born. One full term, and 2 almost full term. She didnt talk about it. I never understood how painful that was for her until my son ended his life at 24. Thankfully Mum and Dad had both passed and did not have to endure that pain as well. My life changed forever the day my son passed. One day we will meet again. This was a heartwrenching video but so enlightening. Thank you to those who allowed their stories to be told.❤

[@PlatinumIrishrose]

I burst into tears when I read your story. I'm in 15 degree weather waiting for a tow truck. All of a sudden, your story made me realize I can pray for my kids and stop being ungrateful for slow triple AAA. I'll pray for you and my boys. I will never forget your story. It has moved me profoundly.❤😢

[@logo9470]

I am so sorry for your incredible loss. I am sending you lots of love, strength and light. As you said, some day you will be together again ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

[@karencreighton7939]

So much devotion and love for these children. I admire these parents so much. The siblings are amazing, too.

[@kimberlyburd784]

My son Ethan Murrey Burd was stillborn May 12th 1998. I think of my sweet firstborn son every single day and what he would be doing now, where In life he would be. My 2nd son who lived was born May 13th 1999. Almost exactly the same day and time. I've been blessed with a total of 4 living children here on earth.

[@geraldineowens7001]

This programme was so sad..losing a child no matter what the reason or the age is horrendous but losing a baby is inconceivable...when I lost my daughter all that kept me going was that god needed new angels and he took the best ones....I'm not remotely religious but it got me through some of the pain...but you never forget the loss...love to the parents in this video.❤

[@karenwelsh1705]

Funny, (not ha ha funny) but I can so relate, I am not religious either, but I took comfort in a comment made to me once when my baby son died. The person said to me ( God keeps the most magnificent garden in heaven, and he only chooses the most beautiful blooms to add to his garden ) weird huh, but it sat right with me for a very long time. I am so sorry for your loss

[@beehungry6190]

I dont think I could carry on because I got severely depressed after a traumatic 15 week miscarriage years back.

[@obnoxiousbluebird6634]

I just want to say thank you so much to all the parents/family members who shared their heartbreaking, and also some very heartwarming stories, both in the video, and here in the comments. I have never lost a child. Like all other parents, it's my biggest nightmare. I have 4 kids and my brain literally won't even entertain the THOUGHT of life without any one of them, so what these parents feel/suffer/cope with is not something I in any way feel qualified to define/talk about! But in my role as an emergency nurse, I have treated, held hands with, and hugged way too many parents as they've tried to process this magical, love filled miracle, turned horror, in newborn AND in child loss. I've seen the pure, painfully raw, and absolutely heart wrenching grief these parents have had to go through, watching their child decompensate and having to make decisions that they know will cause themselves to suffer greatly, but they make them because they know it will cause less suffering for their child, and , and just witnessing it on the regular has resulted in me choosing to take advantage of some pretty regular therapy to help me process my job because, even though I'm lucky enough to be able to go home and cuddle my babies (and I do, after EVERY shift, regardless of the time or whether I had a child patient that day) you can't NOT get affected and caught up in something that is so full of so much raw emotion and two such opposing states; Pure, genuine, neverending love, and incomprehensible grief and horror, and I'm surrounded by, interacting with, and absorbing some of that grief, but as just a nurse I don't have a decent, respectful way (or right) to express it, and the knowledge that what I'm feeling is merely the "shockwave" and "tip" of this family's experience, makes me feel selfish for even wanting to! I come home and cry to my husband, and love on my kids, just to release the pressure so I can get up next day, go to work and do it all over again and, for my own mental health, it's necessary I do so, but I often feel guilty for even doing that! When I see parents, so clearly traumatised by what they're facing, but who try so damn hard to put that aside so they can be strong for their baby and spend the meaningful time with him/her that they can, while they can, and release the grief and pain when their child doesn't need them to be strong anymore, I just can't express my admiration for them. It takes a strength most people couldn't even comprehend to get through it, and so much courage to talk about it and relive it, and is the most powerful, touching, beautiful and selfless love I have EVER witnessed in my entire 32 years on this planet!

[@user-tg7pl4rj8o]

My heart is breaking for you. So glad you had her as long as you did. God is with her. I pray for your healing as a family. God bless your sweet family. ❤

[@BlueJeanBaby]

This is the most heartbreaking thing I ever watched. 💔