What's CODEPENDENCY And How To Heal It Quickly! [4 Steps]

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Christina Lopes, DPT, MPH

Christina Lopes, DPT, MPH

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 661
@ChristinaLopes
@ChristinaLopes 3 жыл бұрын
💥 NEXT UP: How to Set Strong BOUNDARIES with Others [4 steps]: kzbin.info/www/bejne/noPUpaalh65-i7M
@ravenstillwaters5195
@ravenstillwaters5195 3 жыл бұрын
I definitely need that information. Ty dear.
@-beTHEchange-123-
@-beTHEchange-123- 3 жыл бұрын
@Don S hey, hopefully Christina answers, might try her on instagram, she is there more but, in my experience healing the wounds results in the other cravings to go away. 🤍 & light to you
@kayleighpapaleo
@kayleighpapaleo 3 жыл бұрын
@Christina you triggered a memory for me in this video. When you spoke about your personal experience with your father at a very young age caring for him when he was ill. Those words triggered a memory from my past that I was unaware of I had to stop your video because I was crying so hard. I don’t know where I would be without your videos and guidance. I’m so glad KZbin suggested your videos to me at the perfect time on my spiritual journey. I had just woken up back in sept2020 and I almost immediately came across your videos 😍 so so much healing has occurred in my life since then through the guidance you give in your videos. Words can’t express my gratitude for you accepting this calling.
@jolenehann6547
@jolenehann6547 3 жыл бұрын
Yes please!!! ❤️
@joopizdebest
@joopizdebest 3 жыл бұрын
Hey Christina - great video, and useful tips that I will definitely use! I was wondering if you took requests for topics in future videos? If so, could you perhaps do one on procrastination? And how fear ties into it? I'd love to see how it is all linked energetically. Thanks in advance :)
@jdamore2
@jdamore2 3 жыл бұрын
I have been through years of therapy and went to school for psychology. I could not break through my codependency, being the giver, until I started chakra healing. I started setting boundaries without even thinking about it. It is one of the first changes I noticed in myself.
@heart2heart-nhataihy117
@heart2heart-nhataihy117 3 жыл бұрын
Good for you, keep going :)
@hihihi1495
@hihihi1495 2 жыл бұрын
@@heart2heart-nhataihy117 hello ng việt nam
@rosaiaruberto6588
@rosaiaruberto6588 2 жыл бұрын
Western psychology has been really limiting healing, change, realization and growth potential. As a monopoly it has also not recognizing and integrating much more ancient and powerful knowledge and practices. It is important to be aware and allow change in the healing sector. We are doing that at all levels.
@msheline
@msheline 2 жыл бұрын
That gives me hope! I need to really start working on my chakras. Thank you for your response here you shared to Christina. This helped me and I'm sure many others. I appreciate. Sending you love.
@johannakunze3300
@johannakunze3300 2 жыл бұрын
What kind of chakra healing did you do? Asking as a fellow psychologist:)
@iamdannita
@iamdannita 3 жыл бұрын
I don’t think is addiction to people, is an addiction to all the emotions that the person make us feel.. Because I was co dependent in some of my relationships but I realized that I was not addicted to them, I was addicted to the ilusión of love and needy they generated in me. I believe 99% of empaths suffer some kind of co dependency when they are not awake of who they really are yet. After the awakening is other Story, absolutely everything change. 🌟 Great video Cristina!
@dabreacacolson7904
@dabreacacolson7904 3 жыл бұрын
This hit for me. From the video to reading this. I have a lot to work on. And if this had a heart button, I would push it!!
@mandydivine7035
@mandydivine7035 3 жыл бұрын
Same thoughts here! Well said.
@iamdannita
@iamdannita 3 жыл бұрын
@@dabreacacolson7904 Go watch the videos of EMPATH UPRISING , that guy will empower you !!!
@dabreacacolson7904
@dabreacacolson7904 3 жыл бұрын
@@iamdannita who is it by so I can click on the next video?!
@samskri6222
@samskri6222 3 жыл бұрын
Totally agree with you, bless you
@kalliopimariacaviara8376
@kalliopimariacaviara8376 3 жыл бұрын
I have been healed by codependency in 2017, after a huge event that took place inside my family, which at first I deciphered as a failure..I was angry, hurt, depressed and felt powerless. But it was the very moment when I realised that everything and everyone outside of me cannot be controlled. I can only control myself, my reactions, my behavior..started constructing my borderlines and cultivating my creative power. Started yoga, meditation, started changing my habits, decided to follow a new career, I moved to a new house, followed a more spiritual path.. new things started happening in my life, that reflected the changes...one little miracle after the other. I broke the pattern and every aspect of my life changed to the better. Now, I am “here” for others when needed and asked, but in a whole different and much much healthier way, in a way that doesn’t drain me and makes me sleep like a baby, walking lighter, being happy.. Christina, your videos are triggering and truly helpful for people. Guys, go on and do all the little changes..it’s a path that starts with baby steps but these steps are the way to open the door for a happy life...and this world needs happier people during this amazing period
@vonBRS
@vonBRS 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing, the light at the end of the tunnel. It means a lot and it gives us hope!
@kalliopimariacaviara8376
@kalliopimariacaviara8376 2 жыл бұрын
@@vonBRS light always finds its way ❤️
@sallycharles1288
@sallycharles1288 Жыл бұрын
I realise that I have become utterly co-dependent on my son after a bitter divorce from his toxic father whom I feel I have to save my son from. It is not healthy for him or me… but I don’t know how to create boundaries with my child who is solely dependent on me. I can’t say no to him, and it kills me if he is unhappy. 😢
@wonderfulrainyday
@wonderfulrainyday 3 жыл бұрын
When you mentioned a workbook I thought „I’m tossing coin for that“ but then you said it’s FREE and I thought „Wow Christina really loves us“ ✨☺️
@graziaromano3531
@graziaromano3531 3 жыл бұрын
Hi, where can I find the work book?
@chasitybaugh3913
@chasitybaugh3913 3 жыл бұрын
Ya I can't find the workbook
@graziaromano3531
@graziaromano3531 3 жыл бұрын
Sorry I still don't see it..where is the video description..just not on my radar I'm afriad
@graziaromano3531
@graziaromano3531 3 жыл бұрын
Got it! Learn something new!!!
@deloresbenjamln2274
@deloresbenjamln2274 3 жыл бұрын
can i please have one of the free work book
@esotericsolitaire
@esotericsolitaire 3 жыл бұрын
Being emotionally neglected by a narcissistic parent is a recipe for codependency.
@EMS01119
@EMS01119 3 жыл бұрын
How so? Could you explain further?
@esotericsolitaire
@esotericsolitaire 3 жыл бұрын
@@EMS01119 The narcissist is concerned only with what affects them. The empath feels others' emotions. So it is easy for an empath's power center to be drawn towards the narcissist. The power center being outside the self is one sign of codependency. Narcissists are energy vampires who feed on empaths' energy. The narcissist can convince the empath that the empath needs the narcissist to survive. The codependent person believes that another person is needed to survive. This is just a start. I see many similarities between codependency and the narcissist/empath relationship.
@sweetbabe3539
@sweetbabe3539 3 жыл бұрын
@Susan A Narcissist mother sets the path for a codependent. Lived in mental misery for most of my life, not knowing why? I thought my mom was the greatest thing, until I AWAKENED! I saw! I saw her mood swing, I saw how I spend a lot of wasted energy trying to help her see how negative she was. I came away most time like I am victimizing her. Not knowing, I needed to spend that energy on fixing me. I am not responsible for her and her crazy attitude.
@esotericsolitaire
@esotericsolitaire 3 жыл бұрын
@@sweetbabe3539 I never thought mine was the greatest thing. If I had of, in some ways, my childhood would have been much easier. I always knew something was off kilter. She just did not behave like other mothers. Now I know.
@alexandra2536
@alexandra2536 3 жыл бұрын
I was emotionally neglected by my narc father so I have always looked for a man to fill this void. I was obssessed with having a boyfriend and I still am. I have to get out of this pattern and see myself as enough. I AM ENOUGH !
@shawnteldrake367
@shawnteldrake367 3 жыл бұрын
I literally cried towards the end of the video. To know that I’ve spent the majority of my life being codependent and it’s not until now I realize I have so much work to do- so much unlearning and relearning. If it wasn’t for my spiritual awakening I would still be so miserable. I sincerely thank you for creating this video. It was extraordinarily helpful!
@maattherealtruth7393
@maattherealtruth7393 3 жыл бұрын
Ou2
@stellaknol2273
@stellaknol2273 3 жыл бұрын
Yes thats how I feel. Thank you Christina to bring to the surface what I deep down already know.
@yodo73
@yodo73 3 жыл бұрын
Same happens to me . I have not words to describe how glad I am feeling!
@Rosie1996
@Rosie1996 3 жыл бұрын
I feel you, I also just realised I've been codependent this whole time...
@valeriedubois8955
@valeriedubois8955 2 жыл бұрын
Many blessings and love to you. 💕
@mandolaa
@mandolaa 3 жыл бұрын
Codependents also struggle to identify their emotions and especially to feel anger and express it. Guilt is number one trait of codependency. Usually codependents are raised by self-centered,selfless, narcissistic parents and choose partners with the same dynamics (aka narcissistics as well) because of the confirmation bias, until the trauma is healed
@brandikelley9711
@brandikelley9711 3 жыл бұрын
Up until now 😊
@graziaromano3531
@graziaromano3531 3 жыл бұрын
I've only just identified this pattern deep within me and it's very unsettling...makes you questions everything.
@FaithResurge
@FaithResurge 3 жыл бұрын
Can you go in depth about your first two lines. The struggling to identify their emotions and especially to fill anger and express it
@mandolaa
@mandolaa 3 жыл бұрын
@@FaithResurge search on internet or youtube about enmeshment trauma. Codependency starts from childhood
@FaithResurge
@FaithResurge 3 жыл бұрын
@@mandolaa oh you meant identify the source. Ok.
@margit6521
@margit6521 3 жыл бұрын
12 years ago I got 10/10 signs. Today I got 7/10. So I guess I'm slowly moving towards my real self? Thank you Christina!
@beautyroses8771
@beautyroses8771 3 жыл бұрын
This is spot on. One thing I'd like to add is that All of our emotions come to tell us something, anger included. Anger, in my opinion, means we aren't listening/we don't feel heard. I believe that when we feel anger- it is our inner being nudging to us that 'it's' not being heard. It shows we aren't listening to ourselves, we aren't validating ourselves.
@anacarmelle3496
@anacarmelle3496 3 жыл бұрын
I love you so much. I was adopted at 2 from third world country. My mom who adopted me was blind so and I was the only child she adopted. She was also badly treated being blind and abused and neglected by her own family. She was a missionary and had many good intentions but cycles still happen. I feel this so much. I have been healing for the past year and you have been such a large part of my healing. Thank you so much.
@thegroovypatriot
@thegroovypatriot 3 жыл бұрын
I can absolutely verify that the focus is outside of self. I call it "other focused". It is so deeply rooted that even with my awareness and much work, it is persistantly under the surface and I catch myself still doing it all the time. If anyone else is near, my default focus is on them. I had a revelation once where I realized I was the center but my awareness was outward, like I was on a stage for others. It woke me up and started my journey. Still traveling! Thanks for addressing this most important of issues Christina!
@susansilverstein889
@susansilverstein889 3 жыл бұрын
I love other focused...it is the perfect description. 🙏
@thegroovypatriot
@thegroovypatriot 3 жыл бұрын
@@susansilverstein889 Yes
@masham3467
@masham3467 2 жыл бұрын
Yeah, I have a similar thing. When i am with others, I always feel what they feel, and don't really feel my personality. Like I am dissolving in them. The other thing is that I can really feel the mood of another person, and it helps to build the conversation in the right direction.
@cindywomack5911
@cindywomack5911 3 жыл бұрын
I’m slowly healing from being a co-defendant. Partly because of you and your teaching and also because I’ve awakened to my spiritual self. My father was pretty much nonexistent in my life. Thank you for all you do for people. ❤️
@wendyvoye3110
@wendyvoye3110 3 жыл бұрын
Yes. My mom was very sick (mental health) and I felt like I had to take care of her. This sheds a lot of light on things. Thank you.
@ambersueart5713
@ambersueart5713 3 жыл бұрын
This video popped up as I was deep in meditation. I opened my eyes and knew immediately this is one of those angelically-led synchronicities 🕊
@blackgirlalchemy5156
@blackgirlalchemy5156 3 жыл бұрын
Same here! Just finished meditating and it popped up 🥰🥰🥰
@HealingIndigoMoon
@HealingIndigoMoon 3 жыл бұрын
Love this!!! ✨💕
@Dexy813
@Dexy813 3 ай бұрын
I am so happy to say I have healed this. I was the person that wanted to save others. I was attached to the wounded people. I felt my worth in myself helping them. Now I’m single and healing every part of me. Great video ❤
@amyfleming5011
@amyfleming5011 3 жыл бұрын
This explains so much. Every single sign of codependency is checked off for me. Thank you for the healing suggestions. 💙
@dianecosta4071
@dianecosta4071 3 жыл бұрын
I swore I was not codependent. Oh my goodness, I am full on codependent. Starting with my childhood through adulthood, I know now I have a major problem with my Mom. Thank you so much for all your advice and suggestions. I am also wondering if I picked nursing as a profession because of this? I am going to get this under control and take my power back. Thanks again.
@ayalaamitay
@ayalaamitay 3 жыл бұрын
I am a nurse too and used to be codependant. Now as e recovered cod. I left my work as a nurse after 32 years and i am free
@hedynoble7712
@hedynoble7712 3 жыл бұрын
I quit nursing at 50 and I feel so happy and relaxed. I really enjoy being alone and doing the things I want to do , not other people want. Freedom at last. Thanks Christina
@TheDstinfrared34
@TheDstinfrared34 3 жыл бұрын
I'm a nurse as well and for the last couple of days this has been my thoughts concerning nursing. Also, I think the nursing profession is full of codependents. In many ways nursing can be like a toxic relationship. We are abused by patients and staff, criticized often, and expected to still be nice while taking care of others when we experience mistreatment.
@dianecosta4071
@dianecosta4071 3 жыл бұрын
@@TheDstinfrared34 I couldn’t agree more. I’m trying to take one day at a time and put boundaries up when necessary. We still can be nice but we do not have to be abused. Good luck!
@dianelamorticella6053
@dianelamorticella6053 3 жыл бұрын
Learn to love yourself and you will heal the codependent!!! Thank you Dr Christina!!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
@CHSN-1
@CHSN-1 3 жыл бұрын
Omg I felt my sense of self slip away one day after a serious traumatic relationship with a narcissist. As I healed I got the good feeling back in my stomach and could be in “flow” again... Wow not having a sense of self is uncomfortable af! Thanks Christina 🙏🏼
@micheller9155
@micheller9155 3 жыл бұрын
Hi Christina just watched this video twice and to answer your question what surprised me the most was that I didn’t realize codependency was an addition! Also I was surprised that I didn’t value myself for many many years. I have been working on myself for about two years now and I have to say I’m much happier with me than I have ever been. I will never go back to being that person I use to be. I’m a good person and I have always been a good person. I don’t feel the need fix people anymore. And I realize I can’t control anyone but myself and that has been truly big for me. I still struggle with Anger sometimes, with the people that treated me so poorly and at myself for allowing those people to say such horrible things to me and never sticking up for myself. But I will never sit silent again. I will always stick up for myself. Thank you for this video. You really went into depth on this and I needed to understand this better. ❤️
@indiracamotim2858
@indiracamotim2858 3 жыл бұрын
I don’t have any words to describe how this resonated with me. I spend all the possible hours of the day trying to help other people and then get angry when they become insensitive, ungrateful or entitled. And then I wonder how I just pass out at night from sheer mental, spiritual and physical exhaustion. Thank you 🙏🏻 thank you 🙏🏻 thank you 🙏🏻
@sll110
@sll110 Жыл бұрын
me too😊
@paula.nasmith
@paula.nasmith 3 жыл бұрын
I really needed this video today. I love how this topic was handled in a very straightforward way without judgment
@maattherealtruth7393
@maattherealtruth7393 3 жыл бұрын
@31:00 it’s really really my feelings. You said what I really felt on the inside. Mad at myself. 🎯🎯🎯
@sagharghaderi4388
@sagharghaderi4388 2 жыл бұрын
i just wanted to say thank you. I've been suffering from codependency for years and i've seen so many therapists and they couldnt help me at all! thank you for saving me.
@ginaloscutoff2023
@ginaloscutoff2023 3 жыл бұрын
Along with the "Anger" "Resentment" plays a key role in Codependency. Feelings of Resentment is what opened MY own eyes.
@lifeofelisha_joy6149
@lifeofelisha_joy6149 3 жыл бұрын
I was this person before I awakened. And I'm still working on this and healing from this. My parents always saw me as good enough when I was able to give, and me always trying to please them and it went on to relationships too. I'm single now working on Self-love.
@Cara-nt7ef
@Cara-nt7ef 3 жыл бұрын
As a life long codependent and a very long term addict, this was very helpful. After completely burning my life down and making sure I was left alone. I finally learned how I gave away all of myself. Loving myself so much now and pray I can help my 15 year get through her codependent nature (that she got from having to grow up and take care of her sister) before she goes out into life. 💚
@mandydivine7035
@mandydivine7035 3 жыл бұрын
Take her on Zen retreats, practice mindfulness, encourage her to be active and dance! Buy her sage and crystals. Do all the things now, she will integrate it into her lifestyle now. A better chance for her to live a healthy lifestyle now. 15 is tough she needs all the positive influence she can get. much love and namaste to you and yours
@Cara-nt7ef
@Cara-nt7ef 3 жыл бұрын
@@mandydivine7035 thank you!!! I will definitely do that.
@alodera
@alodera 3 жыл бұрын
I think I want to add one more sign of codependency, I realized now: it is difficult to take care of myself, while I can care of other people. For example, it is easy for me to wash dishes at my parent's or friend's home, but it is so hard to do the same for myself.
@alodera
@alodera 3 жыл бұрын
Now I understand better what's going on with my creativity. I was struggling to work with music, but now when I have time and even paid order for music, it is very hard to just sit and start. Also I am sad and ashamed of myself. But I want to learn to really value myself. Thank you for the video.❤️It is so important to know, that I really can help myself.
@charm202
@charm202 2 жыл бұрын
This is life changing information, I hate to admit but I'm a copdependant and struggled with finding myself and my power. Your videos have helped tremendously in my healing journey and I can't thank you enough!
@Mkm385
@Mkm385 3 жыл бұрын
I knew something is wrong with because I ended up with narcissist and toxic people 2 times in my life... I never knew it is called codependency.. I love you Christina thank you so much for making me aware of this...
@aNnAkt1qw
@aNnAkt1qw 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much, this has been me for many years and many toxic relationships (family, lovers, friends). I resonated with you Christina and hold my hand up. I am a newly awakened empath well a year now and have been healing, setting bounderies and meditating. I will download the work book, you have helped me lots with my journey many thanks 💙👍🙏💐💕
@angelachambers5977
@angelachambers5977 3 жыл бұрын
You were spot on with this one. From my childhood to now I've struggled. My biggest struggle is being a mother and knowing the boundaries I need. I second guess my parenting all the time.
@wendyvoye3110
@wendyvoye3110 3 жыл бұрын
I justed to say that the fact you made the workbook free almost made me cry! I'm so grateful to you for that. I am dealing with this and boundaries and I really want to heal that issue. Thank you! ❤
@katev3832
@katev3832 6 ай бұрын
I learned most of this through overwhelm and exhaustion and feeling unappreciated. What surprised me was that I had ulterior motives! I thought I was sacrificing for the people I loved and got little or nothing in return. I didn't see that my self worth was tied up in these relationships. I wanted out of them so badly at times that I was suicidal. I also learned much more about how and why I gave my power away. I thought it was just taken away in childhood and there was no way to reclaim it. I see now that I was that baby elephant tied to a stake that didn't know it could just pull it up and walk away once I had grown. My conditioning had those beliefs of powerlessness down so deep that I felt trapped in helping others and unable to ask for help myself. The abusers I ran away from, the addicts I felt that I could not abandon. I constantly felt abandoned myself, not realizing that it was really ME who had abandoned me. Thank you, Christina, for your guidance on how to heal this. Years of therapy have not helped as much as the wisdom you shared in this video ❤
@janicesmith56
@janicesmith56 2 жыл бұрын
Crying while watching this video for the second time. I watched it a year ago but this time I understand it fully. I will overcome this!
@Glitteryglows
@Glitteryglows 3 жыл бұрын
Who else has recovered from codependency? Raise your hand and be proud! 🤩🙋🏾‍♀️
@thisisnchan
@thisisnchan 2 жыл бұрын
Surprisingly, from your VDO I have just learned that I am a Codependent with 8 signs you stated. I'm so grateful to your kindness with compassion in putting all valuable information you experienced and researched for us. Many many thanks Christina. I love to listen all your VDO.
@Lil_Lite_O_Mine
@Lil_Lite_O_Mine 3 жыл бұрын
Oh my God ... this is me ... my whole family... my whole life ~ hit a major cataclysm of mass, life-heart-wrending shock, confusion yesterday. Huge. This video is the hugest miracle. Just ... thank you
@capt069088
@capt069088 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you very much.. I was not aware that I am having this issue.. My TF ran away because I have abandoned myself.. I forgot about what truly matters.. Now I am stepping into my power and gaining it back as I have realized that this journey is about myself.. The expression of the Divine in me.. I thank you.. O really need this..
@CcannibalCcat
@CcannibalCcat 3 жыл бұрын
My mom’s codependency with my stepdad ruined her life and I’ve never fully understood it. So glad you put this video out!! Can’t wait to watch it!!
@liyahlang949
@liyahlang949 3 жыл бұрын
This is what is happening to my mother, and I have no clue how to help her. Every time I say something it’s swept under the rug. “ she doesn’t know anything” is what everyone says to me. So I let it go I care for her but I have to move on with my life. I sent her this I hope she listens if she can’t listen to her own daughter
@lenaM-gx2gk
@lenaM-gx2gk 3 жыл бұрын
What surprised me the most today through your learning, is that my self worth Resonates within other people outside of myself.
@virgoddess824
@virgoddess824 3 жыл бұрын
First of all....I LOVE YOUR VIDEOS 🙌🏾 I cant tell you how much you've helped me create an emotional and spiritual vocabulary through your work. And help me understand the "why". I had NO IDEA I was codependent. Severely! Never knew what it was or that I was a walking around in that space. Its a little embarrassing honestly. But better 33 than 53 right? Im so grateful I cant stand it! Thanks ❤
@HildaMVegaRN
@HildaMVegaRN 3 жыл бұрын
I was so reluctant to see this video because “I’m not co-dependent” or so I thought I wasn’t. It all makes so much sense to me now. Thank you and now working on regaining all my power back! I’ve learned so much with your videos. Sending you lots of unconditional love with so much gratitude 💕 💕💕✨💫💛
@mettaways
@mettaways 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Christina for this wonderful teaching. It’s helped answering questions about why I keep attracting people who’ve made me feel like I could/should helped them. I was a codependency (I exhibited all the symptoms you mentioned) 😳 😆 😌. I still am and now with awareness I’m going to heal heal it and gaining back my power as well as setting my boundaries. Thank you 🙏
@JEEPBABYB
@JEEPBABYB Жыл бұрын
😮that hit home when you said we help others to make ourselves feel better and that is spot on ..I thought it was a good thing to help others but I do get burnt out and feel lost when on my own .. I save others and I can’t save myself
@rebeccaavey3342
@rebeccaavey3342 3 жыл бұрын
I am co-dependent and NOW I AM AWARE OF IT .. TAKING STEPS TO HEAL IT... Thank You 😊
@stephaniea.6022
@stephaniea.6022 3 жыл бұрын
Truly and fully loving yourself (and it has to be energetically and deeply felt from the inside, not just said or acted out - though those are starting points) is when codependency begins to fade away and real connections emerge. It's a gradual process, not a quick fix...but you'll one day begin to love the world and people around you with no underlying agenda for you or them. That kind of healing invites those who truly see you and want you to show it the healthy way and it creates a wonderful balance of giving and receiving in relationships. Thank you, Christina!
@sll110
@sll110 Жыл бұрын
wow😂😂😂
@pamgreyling2025
@pamgreyling2025 3 жыл бұрын
Dear Christina I have had all the signs of co-dependency until I was 47. I then looked for help and there was an enormous change in my life. My marriage really suffered when my behavior changed and I really stopped being co- dependent. I experienced a huge relief in my life. For the first time in my life I could start taking care of myself. I have done a course on boundaries which has also helped me.
@jnikkd50
@jnikkd50 3 жыл бұрын
I have been in co-dependent relationships all my life & it's exhausting! My brother & I were raised around drugs & alcohol. I then.met a man when I.was.20 & felt the need to save he & his son & you.know the story & addictions of one form or another....wow! It makes so much sense! Its like we are tidaly locked for 34 yrs & I have been afraid I won't escape & the self.sabotage & lack of self worth
@monicafriend3387
@monicafriend3387 3 жыл бұрын
What surprised me the most was the 10th sign anger. It of course makes perfect sense. I just never made the connection like that. Thank you 🙏🏻
@InfinitePisces
@InfinitePisces 3 жыл бұрын
I struggle with a lot of shame because I can't instantly fix myself from this. I know that's distorted thinking but I needed to express this.
@clairemiller4228
@clairemiller4228 3 жыл бұрын
I’m still in the early stages of my awakening, and I feel a lot of ego pushback when learn hard truths about myself, like that I’m codependent. When I notice this happening, I try to acknowledge it, not judge it, and work with soothing mantras (“This is for my best and highest good.” “Healing is necessary.” “I love and accept all parts of myself.” Etc)
@loves2sing4fun
@loves2sing4fun Ай бұрын
Wow, I’m so glad that I came across this video because I realize that I was once codependent, but I have since healed that. Thank you for this wonderful content!
@jodiewalker3705
@jodiewalker3705 2 жыл бұрын
I was definitely codependent but am healing slowly over the past few years.
@AnikoDobiasz
@AnikoDobiasz 3 жыл бұрын
Hi Christina, thank you! I just want to add a reason what creates codependecy. In my case and I think in many others as well : besides being neglected the child doesn't get any compliments ONLY when she helps or does sth good for others. I remember that I was thinking all the time what I could do to make my mom happy or to get compliment. Also nothing was good enough for my dad. Even if I did my best: for example very young age I cooked but my dad - not rude but - always found something to criticize.
@xogamerchi3923
@xogamerchi3923 3 жыл бұрын
Just the fact that you said I have to take my power back… visualizing my power coming back to me has been so healing ❤️‍🩹 I can’t thank you enough
@healingtipsguidedmeditatio5117
@healingtipsguidedmeditatio5117 3 жыл бұрын
I really surprised when I heard about that I m saving people bcoz of I want to feel worthy ..o my God..I had a hard childhood .I was a parent to my parents Nd my younger bro..I m now 44 and whole life I have been shoulder that other responsibilities on me uncounciously ..it's really shockd me that I never feel wanted or much needed by others.i always feel powerless and drained.. From four years after gone through my dark night of soul period I started doing shadow work and searching for solutions and universe sending me more help. That's magical..I m really improving Nd realising in awareness that where I was doing wrong.thanks to sister ur all videos helping people like us ..and this codependency video is really superb..I was into that codependency traits.felt helpless without others ..I m living alone but I crave for human connection so much and need love. I m a loving person but some issues I have to clear and heal.. Lots of blessings and love to u with abundance..u really helping this world family collective energy. I lost my partner's bcoz of this traits.bcoz if I don't value myself how they can? I m learning to feel worthy and valuable plus creating more boundaries and stop people pleasing and saying no when I feel to say without any guilt and other projection on me. 👍👍 Thanks for guidance and kind help. Prayers and blessings for the collective counciousness.🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️✨😊😊
@Melisusy21
@Melisusy21 3 жыл бұрын
I'm on the fence with this one. Maybe Im not a full-blown codependent. I don't need people and don't seek out broken people. My motto is be your own hero and I live by that and tell others to do the same. BUT I do have a fear of abandonment and my childhood was full of emotional and physical neglect and abuse. I grew up early taking adult roles wayy before I should have. Having to cater to my Narcissistic mother's needs. I love helping people but it's not a need and I don't expect a thank you which ends up me being in toxic relationships where they are one sided and not reciprocated. Thank you for the video. I have a lot to think about. And a lot to heal.
@alikidourmazer7746
@alikidourmazer7746 3 жыл бұрын
I am so glad that she points out that going to a therapist and working from the mind is not enough unless you heal the chakra that has energy disfunction.
@BeautyByMelxxo
@BeautyByMelxxo 2 жыл бұрын
Hi Christina, I can see a cycle within my family. My mums mum emotionally neglected her was to busy doing her own thing and my mum is a very co dependant person with men she is with, but she’s also quite selfish to this day at 58. She also then done the same to me , emotionally neglected me as a child as she was always busy with other stuff and pleasing other people/her partner. I then realised my first proper relationship I was being co dependant also. But finally I have broke the cycle and now with someone where I don’t feel I always need to help them. He works on himself and I support him, but I’m not holding his hand trying to save him and do everything for him. So glad I broke free from this, unfortunately I don’t think my mum will ever change but I’m glad I have made progress spiritually as I spent time on my own after my first breakup and thought about everything and done a lot of healing and work on myself realising I deserve so much better and to value myself and have a sense of self . X
@gnomie...
@gnomie... 3 жыл бұрын
I am just so grateful for your videos Christina. They always arrive exactly when I'm ready. I have been healing my codependent tenancies for so long and I feel so happy with how far I've come. Your video just helped me break through that next glass ceiling. Gonna drum and dance tonight! ✨🔥✨
@Lixae
@Lixae 3 жыл бұрын
My mother has bpd and she was heavily abused by her mother and it reflected alot in the way shs acted. She hated everything I was into and when I became a vegetarian she refused to cook for me or even try. This video taught me alot thank you.
@blondediiahmond3082
@blondediiahmond3082 3 жыл бұрын
Wow 😯 you nailed it at age 4 I was taking care of everyone. My father was horribly physically abusive . I had to grow up fast and had no childhood. At age 12 my mom left me literally. She was gone. She was 10 miles away with her high school sweetheart. Drinking every day. Yeah I grew up fast. And this is me. Codependent. Thank you Christina. I’m in therapy now and things are getting better. Your videos help me just so so much. 🌸
@marthamdiaz5837
@marthamdiaz5837 3 жыл бұрын
Thanks for enlightening me and giving me some guidance during a difficult time in my life right now. Been in a codependent relationship with an alcoholic/drug addict for 27 yrs. I'm ready to move on 🙏
@shawntalwilson8
@shawntalwilson8 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Christina, you have brought me a so many other beautiful souls so far, please keep doing what you're doing! I thank the universe for you and this wonderful community!💗☯️🌻🦋Love and Light to all🥰🥰
@jimludwig3108
@jimludwig3108 3 жыл бұрын
LOVED this!! Hi, my name is Jim and I’m a recovering codependent!! Lol Honestly though this is absolutely awesome information and I’d have loved to come across this 3-25 years ago! I still see some of the signs in me but I’m very aware of them and usually catch myself now. Still need work on my sacral though and now have some tools to go get. Thank you so much for your heart Christina, much appreciated!!🙏
@jlynngambler
@jlynngambler 3 жыл бұрын
What surprises me most is that codependency ties into the second chakra, besides the first? Never heard of it before! But maybe it will help to add it into my regimen, though I listen to Hz music for the lower three. It's fascinating how and why it can manifest in people in several ways. For me, I was raised and conditioned into it. If I didn't do what my mom (grandmother really) wanted, I was threatened and manipulated. I was told that nothing was ever mine. I couldn't do this. I couldn't do that. No good guy would ever want me. Things like, "If you don't do ______, then I'm going to _______" were frequently used. If I wanted to do something for me or didn't want to give something away, I was being selfish and I ought to be ashamed of myself. At 9+, I had to clean part of my aunt's place, take care of her animals, and then 2 years later help with her kid. Later, I had to watch my dad (grandfather), and while I appreciate that time I got to spend with him, I was usually never asked, but told and manipulated. It's ironic that I don't feel I NEED a boyfriend, for example. Or that though I like spending time around others sometimes, I'm quite happy spending time by myself and thrive, and am then able to be happier around others. There were/are still negative affects though, such as getting into toxic relationships. And in the past, I used to behave like I could fix or help someone, and now I don't even want to try Lol. I've been learning to place boundaries and see red flags beforehand and look at the belief system that was cultivated within me and what I truly feel and believe about myself. I gave my power away because I believed that (you guessed it): I couldn't do this, I couldn't do that, and I must be selfish. Codependency has been my biggest Achilles heel when it comes to family members. It's not a true desire of my own to take care of them, take blame and responsibility, and put up with their crap. But it IS my responsibility to heal that part of me that feels like I have to help them or even say "F it" when they EXPECT it. Now that I'm older, I don't have to agree to it, and can pass their crap right back to them for them to deal with. Codependency had also seeped into and attracted other undesirable relationships (friendships, dating, etc...). Thank you for touching down on and exploring this subject in greater depth. What makes healing a little smoother is knowing that it was never my choice to begin with. My mom wanted to control me and make me do what she wanted me to do and she didn't care how I felt or what I really wanted. Can you please possibly do a video of clients or contributors' success stories, how they dealt with it, and so on. And could you also do one video on the separate functions of the lower three chakras and how they work together. I always thought root was security, base awareness, and tribe. Second was creativity, birth, and sex. And solar plexus is personal power and self esteem. I know this is a long comment, but I want to thank you for going into it more and providing some unique helpful tips. Much love and gratitude ❤️!
@coffeelover9910
@coffeelover9910 3 жыл бұрын
Seriously it's only today that I realized why I give so much to people! I didn't notice that I really do it to make me feel good, to feel like I am such a good person, like a savior. And yes I met a few narcissists in my life because of that. Seriously major eye opening for me today. Thank you for all your teachings.
@MayainBulgaria
@MayainBulgaria 3 жыл бұрын
What a coincidence! I was wanting to ask you how codependents know if they’re following they own joy or others. It’s tough because it brings codependents relief to get other people’s needs get met. So I guess it’s the difference between relief and joy I need to focus on. Thanks so much for this video 🙏
@shanatroyer8358
@shanatroyer8358 3 жыл бұрын
This was absolutely amazing. Until about six months ago, I was so wrong about what codependency actually is. And it’s just been within the last week or so that I realized I am really angry…at myself. I have allowed this. I have invited these situations/relationships into my life. I wish I would have learned these things so much earlier but it’s better late than never. One of the things I loved the most about this video was the 4 tips to healing. So many videos tell you why you’re a certain way but give no guidance in how to heal. Thank you for this!
@sonyalichti4033
@sonyalichti4033 3 жыл бұрын
This is the first time I have heard this explanation ! I was that child and still am. OMG what a lightbulb moment! Having the responsibility of a parent as a child because nobody else could do it. Feeling your power being drained from you by toxic people, wow. I knew it was happening but did not understand why.
@tamarax590
@tamarax590 3 жыл бұрын
Hi Christina, I can feel you totally! My mother got sick when I was 8 and she died when I was 11. My dad couldn’t handle it so I was his support, a lot of other problems ex, they were fighting all the time and I was the one who had to bring peace. My parents had a fight in the car, but I stayed home and eventually they had a car accident, where my mother died. I really understand you about feeling as a failure, because My dad was really forcing me to come too on the day of the accident. Thank you for sharing so much and interesting information! I’m so happy and grateful for ‘finding’ your YT-channel!!
@ediedingee6232
@ediedingee6232 3 жыл бұрын
What surprised me the most about codependency was having the realization of how codependent I am😔thank you so much for your video I wrote almost everything down and will be doing a ceremony and unblocking my 2nd, 3rd and heart chakra so woo hoo !!! Thankful I learned this and thankful for you for making this and teaching everyone how to heal from it, and I’m about to watch the videos from the link right now thank you so much Christina🙏💚
@kavitrathilak6178
@kavitrathilak6178 3 жыл бұрын
I am healing my codependency and I kind of knew it came from my childhood- adult roles. But when you said adult roles I was shocked because I didn't expect it to come to me on video. lol. Thank you so much for every video. Your content has changed my life
@vaishalivaidya7978
@vaishalivaidya7978 Жыл бұрын
We are all codependent on some level of that spectrum. The more awareness we have, the more choice we have to make decisions that enable release this pattern. It just doesn't release one person but others in the relationship as well. I'm a recovering codependent
@stevencoulter9980
@stevencoulter9980 3 жыл бұрын
Wow! Every symptom. Every single one! I’m gobsmacked, however, grateful too. I’ve been working on myself for 12 yrs, and to finally find this very clear, descriptive wonderful video, it’s my gift to find it right now. Such a “ HUGE” codependent here, funny, I’ve never seen this idea before, I guess because Im finally ready for it at 58.
@valentinevanaugustine656
@valentinevanaugustine656 3 жыл бұрын
Yess and right before the pisces new moon! I love my fellow water signs, this is a much needed video for ya'll. Oh and Virgos. This video is for everyone but highly recommend for anyone with water placements in their chart. Or healing from psychological abuse.
@thecatwoman6496
@thecatwoman6496 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much Christina. I never thought I wanted to be ‘needed’ by others because I’m always so afraid they will need more than I can give, and I don’t want anyone dependent on me. BUT my gut churns almost constantly. It feels like grief. Constant and never-ending grief. Almost the only time I get relief is when I’m working out in the garden. When anyone around me is angry, or unhappy I feel I have to fix them. Then I feel some relief. And I let others treat me like crap. No boundaries. So I am co-dependent after all.
@DivineMotherMusicMaster
@DivineMotherMusicMaster 16 күн бұрын
Everything you mentioned was and is happening in my life dear Kristina. After listening to your message I have realised I am a codependent and iI am being in relationship with my narcissist husband since 25yrs. It’s time for me to heal completely now. I would like to interact further with you on email. Big thanks and much love sweet dear Kristina. Namaste❤️🙏💕🎈🌈
@carolinepowell2708
@carolinepowell2708 2 жыл бұрын
Recovering co-dependent here! Been working through the mental aspects of healing my co-dependent tendencies and even though I am now aware of when my thoughts, actions, and feelings are coming from a co-dependent place, and I have DEFINITELY made progress over the past 6 months or so, I still have been having a hard time cutting those final strings that keep me tethered to my "addiction." Don't know why it never occurred to me that it is because I'm missing the spiritual element, but I'm glad I was lead to this video because I think this may finally help me break those patterns and move forward! Thank you! ❤
@elixirlove2062
@elixirlove2062 3 жыл бұрын
THIS!!! A THOUSAND TIMES THIS!! OMG!!! Perfect explanation!! I’m familiar with codependency and has been working on this especially intensely in the last year, but this information is so important! Thank you so much for sharing this. I’m familiar with the sacral chakra but didn’t know that it is is the beginning of individual power and is connected with relationships. I am loving these insights!
@erink7837
@erink7837 3 жыл бұрын
I always find this channel very helpful on my healing journey. From psychology and spirituality points of view, my soul, mind and spirit are being reminded and empowered to be ready the path of recovery. In my case of codep, I grow up with a narcissist mother who completely torn my childhood. That's probably another sign of a codep. Other sign of codep: when everyone says a person is rude/toxic, you still keep contact and excuse his/her mistakes. When I found all my friends and coworkers are needy ppl or narcissist, I know how serious of my codep. Just like addict, codep will go through withdraw and repalse very often through the rehab journey. Need a support group such as this channel. Namaste. Still hope 🦋
@sll110
@sll110 Жыл бұрын
ME T OO
@Freesoulight
@Freesoulight 3 жыл бұрын
Hey Christina when is your live group meditation I'm waiting for you
@natzz8420
@natzz8420 3 жыл бұрын
Me too
@cylestine
@cylestine 3 жыл бұрын
Me, too! ♡
@irenemaine
@irenemaine 3 жыл бұрын
Me 3...been a minute
@deborahfilsinger107
@deborahfilsinger107 3 жыл бұрын
Yes me too!!!
@Iamdivine.goddesslaura
@Iamdivine.goddesslaura 3 жыл бұрын
Same here 🙋🏽‍♀️
@brendadrew834
@brendadrew834 3 жыл бұрын
Really great informative video Christina..spot on! I'm a recovering co-dependent over the past six years and had a spiritual awakening and felt myself ascend spiritually and psychologically. When I was growing up with a malignant narcissistic sociopathic father we weren't allowed to ever say no to him or my co-dependent mother so that's where I learned not to be able to say no. And we had no boundaries either, why I was sexually molested by my two older brothers in our toxic dysfunctional family! My therapist when I questioned her about the responsibility of the church in all of this told me that it does create co-dependent behavior esp in women. I think that's true with all the three top patriarchal world religions, the men at the top hierarchy are narcissistic and hold the power and they expect women to give of themselves i.e. selfless to the point of co-dependency! Always do for others before and instead of yourself lest you come across as selfish! Even giving up your own name and identity! I kept my own name when I first got married but allowed myself to be manipulated by my late husband who was like my late father..'repeat compulsion" whom I was married to for 42 years with three daughters. I did take the word obey out of our vows in 1974 and didn't always let him boss me around. I stood my ground the best I could! Think he must have really hated that. Now I see some of these traits in my grown daughters but lost my middle one to Covid19 last year plus my two 13 1/2 year old cats. so am trying to heal from that as well while having MS which I've learned from other doctors/psychologists can be caused from too much stress and emotional/physical abuse! If I only knew 50 years ago what I knew now..."knowledge is power" and "better late than never' like they say! Survivor and working on thriving as well. Thanks so much for your love and support, much appreciated always! Love all your wonderful helpful videos!! My new addiction but a healthy one! lol
@danbartell1380
@danbartell1380 3 жыл бұрын
Just watched this.. So overwhelmed by it ! Feeling so much emotion! Married 27 years recently both decided to separate to confront are problems. Seeing the reality of this.. Brings on so much!!!
@brendagordon3858
@brendagordon3858 3 жыл бұрын
Really hit home with this one Christina wow never saw myself as a co-depenant but yes things Resonated loudly... stepped into this role around 8yrs old helping my mother run the house and take care of younger siblings as she was poorly and single mother. Big wake up call started to realise more work needs to be done on self. I'm going in thank you Beautiful Soul 😊 ❤🙏🏿
@cvetnaspirala
@cvetnaspirala 3 жыл бұрын
Hi Christina! Thank you for hitting again straight to my pain point! I have been wondering why I am so readily responding with intention to help others, and why I find myself drained from my energy when I actually start doing it. What surprised most is that co-dependency is related to the 2nd chakra. This answered many questions for me. I am also glad to hear that blocking my creativity is a sign of a weakened 2nd chakra (in addition to further weakening it). In fact I fully consciously chose to make this block. You talked about the dysfunctional family, I believe that emotional support also counts as stepping into a caretaker role, when the child feels it needs to defend one of the parents from the attacks if the other? I am also relieved to learn that the sense of self worthlessness is an illusion. I see that I don't need to constantly seek ways to be good or need the approval or acceptance of the others in order to feel that I am doing the right thing. I feel I so much need peace, to be left alone but I am also restless, worried, ashamed and feel guilty for not contributing to the wellbeing of the world.. so I keep getting myself into situations where I want to help someone with something. I keep falling ill or least, keep getting powerful headaches every few days .. I haven't had a period for many months now... Now I can see that maybe I need to get off this fast moving train, take time and repack my bags then when I feel strong and ready, chose which train I want to get on. Warm big hug! Thank you
@billiemike100
@billiemike100 3 жыл бұрын
Wow great video 🤩 I found out I didn’t even realize what codependency actually was. I had my hand on my 2nd and 3rd chakras after you mentioned them and after a couple minutes I could feel my heart beat in both places and it felt amazing. The life that was coming back into me was like leaves growing on a bare tree in a time laps. I feel so clear and more life coming into me 😃 I will no longer say I am a codependent. I am Independent and will continue my life that way. You are the Best Christina. Thank You 🙏🏾
@areayljourney2917
@areayljourney2917 3 жыл бұрын
Would you say an empathic person without healthy boundaries is codependent? Because I just started my spiritual journey & discovered I'm empathic & this video also helped me realize why I put up with my narcissist husband (whom I'm leaving soon b/c he drained my energy so much I developed manic depression & attempted suicide 2x) but found my power & relearned & learned myself & am stepping into my own💖💪🏾🤗
@TeeTee34523
@TeeTee34523 3 жыл бұрын
Omg.... thank you so much for this video, I'm in complete shock and tears by learning that I am this codependent. It was like you described me in my life!!! I must say I always thought in life others controlled me, but in cold hard truth I just faced the fact it is ME! That's a hard pill to swallow, and I never really thought I ever had anger, but Christina you definitely ripped off that blindfold as well ... I have thought I was doing out of good and selflessness for others without " expecting"... but well I guess I lied to myself and others!!! VERY BIG EXTREME 'AH-HA ' moment here... thank you so much!!! Now I realize that my childhood may not have been as great as I thought.. I think I have alot I repressed.
@Enchanted_jewels131
@Enchanted_jewels131 3 жыл бұрын
If I was a little nail, u were the hammer. A lot of truths resonated for me, and even though it hurts a little to admit I’m just as much of the problem as a codependent then I thought, now I can take action and grow! Giving ALL that love to myself and my son 🙌🏽💗
@mnnew6772
@mnnew6772 3 жыл бұрын
Good job exposing codependent over giving as not altruistic. I think the psychological core issue of codependency is being cut off from emotion which is required for core sense of self. It’s so helpful to now understand chakras involved.
@lifeisbeautiful7047
@lifeisbeautiful7047 5 ай бұрын
Need to be needed 👉 Self-sacrifice My needs aren't important Controling people Fixer syndrome Fear of abandonement Martyr complex ; angry for a lack of appreciation Externalized power Relying on people to feel good about yourself
@rachelliu219
@rachelliu219 3 жыл бұрын
Just broke up from another codependent relationship. What a perfect timing! Thank you so much ❤️
@Euphoricbryanna
@Euphoricbryanna 3 жыл бұрын
Sending love your way 🥰
@tedih4885
@tedih4885 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you Thank you 🙏 I did Codependency work years ago, but I find myself back in another relationship where I given my power away. I going to start tonight working with the workbook.
@annuverma7480
@annuverma7480 3 жыл бұрын
I am not a codependent person but I attracted narcissists in my life, It explains now why I was never under their control and why they couldn't abuse me, well they did in a different way like spreading rumours and all ,there are certain things which I can't torelate no matter what because of my self-respect. My sister was manipulative and was used to confuse me mentally but never overpowered me as I never gave that power away.Once she became physically abusive,she clutched my hand so tight in anger that it bruised my hand and that was the last day ,i didn't take it any more. thank you to the people for uploading videos and traits of narcissists,as i didn't know before but recently came to know and got parted from my sister. well before watching these videos I healed.I found out that I was filled with anger with what she did,and i started living like her ,in rage,and you know those people who laugh all the time from their heart and childish ,well i was that and i knew i shouldn't lose it for anyone. Then i started thinking from her point of view,even it is distorted that why she was jealous,how unhappy she would be, that didn't mean i ran back to her,i don't talk to her but I wish she remains happy,as I know If I talk to her I will lose my balance.I am in a good place where i want good for her and me,sometimes anger gets provoked when i see her mentally abusing my youngest sister but then i console myself that anger would not let me be peaceful. And yeah those boys who were narcissists I don't hold at all anger for them as well,one of them took advantage of me when I was drunk,I was just his friend (1 of them),and the friend who took advantage of me spread bad rumours in my office as well, after a month or so ,I released all the anger as I didn't want to live like them in a state of anger,it's exhausing.I didn't go to any psychiatrist and all , i just healed ,1st by becoming as angry as i can,lived in it and then released and then when they pop up in my mind I think good about them,I thought revenge would be fair but nothing is more rewarding then getting healed,only a healed person would understand.
@blacksheep9772
@blacksheep9772 3 жыл бұрын
You have NO IDEA how much I needed this today!!! I will be watching this over & over, I need this to marinate in my codependant brain. Cant live like a codependant anymore (48 years too long). Thankyou thankyou thankyou. ❤❤❤
@jhentoyou8497
@jhentoyou8497 3 жыл бұрын
This was so meaningful to me - and I realized that the 2nd chakra of self identity is orange - (I knew this but it really just hit me now ) and the word orange has nothing that rhymes with it - so the word describing the color in itself is individual -I immediately started my healing and shared the narcissist video with the person in my life who actually triggered this realization in hopes he would take his necessary action - but I’m reclaiming my power every moment moving forward - thank you
@shobanaiyer4093
@shobanaiyer4093 2 жыл бұрын
I show not all 10signs but I know that I'm codependent .In fact since last 2 months have been wanting to change and believe me led to these videos .thankyou
@barbwarmuth2149
@barbwarmuth2149 3 ай бұрын
Christina, I was watching this video to help someone else, and SURPISE, I resonated with so much of it! I'd love to see a video and Motherhood and Codependency!
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