CHRISTMAS TREE DECORATING + Honest Holiday Feels // Infertility & Loss

#infertility #loss #christmastreedecorating
CHRISTMAS TREE DECORATING + Honest Holiday Feels // Infertility & Loss
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Hi friends,
Sharing a video I filmed a few weeks ago - hope you enjoy.
Wishing you all a safe and happy holiday season!
Sending my love to anyone struggling.
xo
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For more regular updates head over to INSTAGRAM ~ @tim.celeste.x
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Link to PURCHASE MY CHILDREN'S BOOK,
"LITTLE DREAM" [ a story to be read to a longed for baby ] :
www.darlingcloverco.com/shop
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INSTAGRAM: @tim.celeste.x
WEBSITE / BLOG: timandceleste.co/
EMAIL: [e-mail]
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We love receiving snail mail from you!
PO BOX 117
Bacchus Marsh VIC 3340
Australia
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Music by Epidemic Sound (www.epidemicsound.com)
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OUR TTC BACKGROUND:
~ Married - May 2013
~ Conceived naturally after a couple months trying, ended in missed miscarriage at 9w4d - Oct 2014
~ D&C
~ Laparoscopy surgery after 1 unsuccessful year of TTC following first miscarriage - Nov 2015
~ Surgery revealed blocked tubes due to infection following D&C
~ Conceived naturally prior to starting IVF, ended in another missed miscarriage at 7w6d- Feb 2016
~ Another D&C
~ Conceived naturally again prior to starting IVF, ended in chemical pregnancy- March 2016
~ IVF egg retrieval #1 - April 2016
~ Fresh embryo transfer ended in chemical pregnancy with 0 embryos frozen
~ IVF egg retrieval #2 - June 2016
~ Fresh embryo transfer ended in chemical pregnancy with 1 embryo frozen
~ Conceived naturally, slow rising HCG & ended in blighted ovum - Sept 2016
~ Yet another D&C
~ FET #1, never happened as our 1 frozen embryo didn't survive the thawing process - Dec 2016
~ IVF egg retrieval #3 - May 2017
~ FET #2- September 2017 - Heartbreaking BFN with PGS normal embryo...
~ Another Laparoscopy & Hysteroscopy surgery - November 2017.... TUBES NO LONGER BLOCKED!
~ DQ Alpha gene partial match - unexplained infertility FINALLY explained! = alloimmune implantation dysfunction
~ IVF egg retrieval #4 - June 2019 - total fertlization failure
~ IVF egg retrieval #5 - September 2019 - 2 PGS normal embryos frozen
~ Gestational surrogacy process started - Nov 2019
~ Gestational surrogacy application hearing to get approval - March 2020
~ FET preparation with gestational surrogate - March 2020
~ Gestational Surrogacy FET #1 with PGS tested embryo - April 2020 - chemical pregnancy
~ Gestational Surrogacy FET #2 with PGS tested embryo - August 2020 - miscarriage at 6w
~ Gestational Surrogacy FET #3 with untested hatching embryo - Oct 2020 - BFN
After 8 pregnancy losses, 11 surgeries, (including egg collections), & 6.5 long years of receiving constant bad news, we are so ready to finally hold our longed for rainbow baby in our arms!

[@roxieeyeleers4465]

I am sorry about Tim's mother. Christmas will bring out the feeling of loss. On a happier note, your kitty is adorable, and such a good "helper"!

[@erinrooney5276]

I really appreciate this video. It’s very helpful to me. I am so glad you where open and made this beautiful video that really shows how so many are feeling. It’s hard to be grieving when everyone seems so full of joy.

[@Emilia60829]

I feel like you took me on your life journey. Hearing your story completely, I realized I have set my expectations of IVF unreasonably too high. Thank you for sharing your story! I wish you all the best!

[@lilied1]

I just saw your Instagram post about your sister's pregnancy. It kinda hit me hard even though i look at your channel every few months. I can't even imagine how miserable you must have felt, when you heard the news. You don't know if you should be happy or sad. You are happy that it's happening to someone you love but then there is this feeling that why it happens so easily for others while you are struggling. Uzt feels unjust. And then comes the resentment you feel toward yourself and the guilt for even having such thoughts!! You are not alone. Stay strong!

[@cristinaromer1433]

Praying for you and Tim! Never give up on your dream. I understand how you feel and how it’s hard during Christmas. My husband and I suffered infertility for almost 8 years and are currently pregnant with our little miracle. I know you will be a mom one day soon in God’s perfect timing! Put all of your trust in him! Sending love!

[@davelamore6309]

Hello

[@clareburke2154]

Thank you Celeste And Tim for sharing your story. I have had a tough year with failed ivf cycle and the intensity of emotions.. sadness despair and loss have been at time too much to bear. Your story has helped me as felt alone in going through this treatment. I sincerely hope and pray for you both for happiness next year and for your dream to happen. I think your both amazing inspirational couple sending love from England xxx

[@pennyalison5827]

I’ve been wondering how you guys are doing. Thankyou for sharing Celeste and Tim 💖 the footage of your fully decorated Christmas tree is so beautiful. Despite how difficult times can be for you, you still manage to see the beauty in things. That is to be truly commended. You are so deserving of a little 1 to love and cherish. It just is so bewildering as to why beautiful people do get such a raw deal. Argh, that’s something In life I’ll never understand. I’m rooting for you guys. Take care of yourselves and each other xoxo 💝

[@dianaray1470]

Celeste, I can only imagine how hard it was to decorate your Christmas tree. And doing it alone broke my heart to watch.I know Tim is struggling as well. Merry Christmas to all three of you ❤️ oh and props to clover for helping you decorate ☺️ as well.

[@TheSenija]

I appreciate so much the fact that you share diificult emotions during holidays. I know how hard it is during Christmas and when you see only happy content all over social media it makes you feel even more depressed. Your channel helped me go through many dreadful moments, I am so grateful and so full of hope for you

[@cvayers1]

I have been watching your channel for about 4 years now. My heart just breaks for you guys. I can’t imagine anyone more deserving of a baby than you two. I have complete faith that you’ll be holding that sweet baby in your arms someday. Sending you so much love and prayers. ❣️

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you so much ❤️

[@kellyjames6702]

I have been watching you for over 4 years now and just wish the best for you and I know one day I will be watching your Labour blog just trust in God it will happen I promise I was trying for a baby for 4 years and I was about to give up but had a dream of holding my baby and found out I was pregnant that month, Anyways have a great Christmas 🎄

[@marial3231]

My sis in law had a baby and I saw a pic of her recently (first one she allowed my brother to take of her with baby) and I was literally pissed off seeing her glowing and radiating in her state of self-actualized glory. Thankfully it didn’t last long but I feel like an evil person for feeling jealous. On the other hand I try to be kind to myself too and not beat myself up for having what was a pretty reasonable reaction. In the end what happens to those around me doesn’t change my situation. I’m so happy for my brother and his wife and they have a precious healthy little boy.

[@ninarostad1975]

Scandinavian Wibe is nice, greetings from Norway

[@leanneadams2549]

I love to have my decorations to be themed every year also !!! It makes it special every year instead of the same thing year after year ❤️

[@chasingrainbowschannel]

Putting up the tree is so hard. I delayed putting ours up and I couldn't even bear to put up ornaments that have any meaning to them. The struggle of the holidays is real! So sorry you are feeling such a heavy weight this Christmas. Praying it gets better for you both!🙏💜

[@mags7815]

you bring a lot of joy to me and I love your videos

[@TimandCeleste]

Aw that means a lot - I'm so glad. Thank you! Sending love this holiday season xx

[@cdesjardins1988]

Beautiful tree ❤ Yes we all need some Christmas vibes to help get through the rest of this year. Soon will be a new year and hopefully a great one at that 🙏

[@TheTeaIsReady]

💗 Keeping you and your family in my prayers. The strength you show by your vulnerability and truth is felt more than you know...

[@melanierose3909]

Praying for you. Sorry about your journey

[@lisap8802]

Merry Christmas from Paris Celeste, wish you the best

[@aislinn1991_]

The end of 2020, welcome 2021 a happy and joyous new year for all. Enjoy your Christmas celeste and Tim, 2021 will bring you joy ❤️🙏

[@meghapatel9902]

sending you hug and praying for you Celeste! hang in there, have an amazing Christmas.

[@natashaharris89]

Merry Christmas lovely! Your tree is beautiful. Wishing you and Tim peace this festive season.

[@davelamore6309]

Hi

[@dvbibbs192]

Merry Christmas Tim & Celeste! The decorations look beautiful 😍

[@nebraska418]

Your tree and decorations are so lovely. Merry Christmas to you both 🎄 (and Clover and Cooper 🐈🐈). Sitting with you in your heartache and praying for better days ahead. 💙

[@mtflem05]

You do such a beautiful job of decorating softly but with color. Not just for the holidays but in your home. It’s so lovely.

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you so much for the lovely compliment! 🥰♥️

[@chloecrawford5426]

Merry Christmas Tim and Celeste. What a beautiful tree. Love and support this season ❤ best wishes for 2021.

[@deirdrekelly2372]

You're a very determined woman and you will be admired for that and you will one day have a baby of your own. It will be very hard to watch your sister go through labour and have your niece/nephew however you will at some point win your battle and it will be so worth it. Try to focus on Christmas and have as nice time as you can and hope 2021 brings you joy !!

[@laurene1389]

Celeste, I truly marvel at your strength and perseverance. I pray you and Tim have a peaceful Christmas and a better and brighter 2021❤️

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you so much ❤️

[@nnejdee5094]

Wishing you all lots of love, laughter and beautiful memories for this holiday season. This is our second Christmas without my mom...this year the reality has set in. Hold each other close. Much love. 💛

[@jacintawatts9457]

Wishing you & Tim a happy and relaxing Christmas. May 2021 bring you both renewed energy for your journey to parenthood. I love your openness of feelings as this will help remind all couples that it is normal.

[@bab883]

Merry Christmas to you and Tim. Keep going and don’t give up with God all things are posssible. Lots of Love from Denmark 🇩🇰❤️

[@alisonorigel573]

What a beautiful tree! Merry Christmas! Keeping you in my prayers!💕

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you! Merry Christmas! xx

[@jewelse5089]

Merry Christmas Celeste ! What a gorgeous tree ! I love the rose gold ornaments.. Sending u love and support this holiday season ❤️

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you! Merry Christmas! xx

[@emmacole9533]

Wishing you both a very merry Christmas and happy New year sending you lots of love and prayers xxxx🎄☃️❤️

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you! Same to you xxxx

[@maram_37]

Merry Christmas Celeste and Tim. I wish I could soften your pain and the heartbreak of infertility during the holidays. I appreciate you so much, you've taught me to hold space for emotions ❤️

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you so much. Merry Christmas to you, too xx

[@cassiforest9191]

Wishing you guys (and the kitties) a Merry Christmas. Christmas doesn't feel the same this year, I had a hard time decorating as well.

[@cherylwilson8743]

Wishing you, Tim and those adorable cats a Merry Christmas. Sending you both hugs from KiwiLand. Take care.

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you! Merry Christmas ♥️

[@Ms_me914]

Beautiful tree. So sorry your going through so much this year. Hope next year is better for you.

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you so much ❤️

[@northerngirl4924]

Merry Christmas to you and yours Celeste! And the very best in 2021!❤️❤️

[@TimandCeleste]

Merry Christmas to you, too! ❤️😘🕊

[@missmadeline500]

Merry Xmas💚🌲

[@stacygibson1322]

Merry christmas to you and tim xxx

[@sarahsaulmusic2929]

Celeste! And, Tim! Lots of love and light to you both during this holiday season. Your tree is beautiful. And... thanks for converting centimeters to feet for us mathematically challenged. Take care dear friends.

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you - same to you, lovely friend! ♥️🌲✨🕊

[@oreed]

Merry Christmas! I'm also struggling with infertility and just received some bad news. I'm enjoying your videos and hoping for the best for you. ♥️

[@TimandCeleste]

I'm sorry... sending love and peace for this holiday season and year ahead xx

[@aliciadeppen6538]

Lovely tree for a lovely couple. Merry Christmas ❤️❤️❤️

[@TimandCeleste]

Merry Christmas! ❤️

[@stephaniescott3412]

I seem to cry every time I watch your videos, the music, the editing and a sort of sadness I guess, BUT 2021 is near, and I know it will bring good things! Merry Christmas Celeste, you are a beautiful soul xx lots of love from Queenstown, New Zealand

[@TimandCeleste]

Aw thank you so much, Steph. Merry Christmas to you, too! ♥️ xx

[@davelamore6309]

Hello how are you doing my friend

[@missquinn861]

You look so so beautiful ❤️❤️

[@06102011BB]

I really love your style ! Would like to see a house tour 🏡

[@judyhuang6776]

For the first time we didn’t even get a tree, I know how you feel...

[@silverlimosine]

I’m so sorry that you are feeling down. I wish I could help in some way. I’m not on an infertility journey but I have had other losses this year from Covid-19, so I totally understand not feeling festive. HOWEVER I think New Years will feel GREAT this year! let’s get OUT OF 2020!!!

[@Kaylzann]

❤️❤️❤️

[@veras7137]

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@Yukahotanashi123]

We just news that out journey is ending due to financial reasons. We are beyond heartbroken but will continue to root for you. I pray with all my being that you get your miracle baby❤️

[@TimandCeleste]

I'm so sorry... Sometimes I just can't comprehend why life is so incredibly cruel and unfair. Sending you so much love xx

[@Yukahotanashi123]

@@TimandCeleste Thank you, that means a lot❤️ Same to you.

[@Sazzay96]

Can I ask where your tree is from? It looks so dense and real looking!!

[@TimandCeleste]

We got it from Balsam Hill

[@dmarr8816]

Ahh I'm 32 today :-/ This holiday season is hard. My husband and I have also been struggling with infertility for 10 years. My little heart hurts. At least we arent alone....god bless

[@TimandCeleste]

Sending birthday wishes and love ♥️

[@dmarr8816]

@@TimandCeleste Thank you!

[@alistairrae9807]

I don’t know what the struggle with infertility is like but I have suffered this year and can’t personally wait till it’s over I am so sorry that this has not been a great year for you both

[@TimandCeleste]

Thank you. Sorry it hasn't been a great year for you either. Here's hoping 2021 is a kinder year in many ways!