Space News: Mars Lander InSight Has Died, No Life On Venus

Space enthusiast Stephen Colbert mourns the loss of NASA’s Mars lander, and looks into reports that it’s impossible for life to exist on Venus.
#Colbert #Comedy #SpaceNews
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via Paramount+, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

[@derekstein6193]

2:10 I would've gone with, "Ashes to ashes, rust to rust." Seems fitting.

[@williamduffy1227]

Or "ashes to ashes, funk to funky"

[@jamesburk8145]

I like to think that no one showed Stephen those space graphics and he's just really good at maintaining his composure.

[@emitheegemini]

I'd like to think so, too 😂

[@joshDammmit]

Oh yeah, absolutely

[@XeroStudios]

that's exactly what happened. i love when he pushed last one away

[@maureenparker6185]

SPACE NEWS IS GREAT . Your grafics departmnt is top notch! LOVE this part of the show but nudt admit that MEANWHILE is my all time favorite..

[@lawrencedoliveiro9104]

3:13 That Venus picture is a false-colour image using the UV band. The clouds look spectacular in UV, unlike in visible light where they are just basically a featureless white.

[@samuela-aegisdottir]

Thanks for info. But it is common to use false-colour images when the picture was taken in non-visible light. The second option is to use black and white images but they are able to contain less information. The false-colour images are not false though, they just link different colours to different wavelenghts, usually shorter wavelenghts being marked with blue, medium with green and longer with red. Sometimes, different colours means different intesities of light, which makes the picture more comprehensible for human eyes. It is not like scientists are adding colours to pictures to make them more fancy and likeable, because there are scientific reasons behind these colours, they are not random, they carry information. They are fancy for us but have meaning to scientists.

[@traildoggy]

"I’m afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it." -- HAL 9000

[@Earthneedsado-over177]

That plays in my head every time I can't remember something.

[@joanlyoung1]

As long as the band is not set up near the toilets or the door to the kitchen, it's a good gig.🤠

[@MB5rider81]

"Throw another crustacean on the flesh burning machine." Underrated

[@keonroshdieh2497]

"Ashes to ashes, beep to boop." LOL. LMAO 😂😂😂

[@High_Alpha]

On behalf of Aussies... well played sir, well played.

[@CJFerg81]

I swear the Graphics and Writing teams are doing everything they can to make Stephen crack during this segment. It didn't work this time but it will someday 🤞

[@kilmer009]

Here's the thing, they do a rehearsal for each show. So he's literally doing everything twice, and I bet he DOES crack a ton the first time around. When he does it on the live show you know it's a really good one.

[@laurenkwh]

I love space, too, and appreciate The Late Show producing a science segment like this. And also, “Beep Boop”. 💀

[@danjohnston9037]

R.I.P. Little Bot You Will Always Be Part Of Us

[@jamiewatkins4178]

I wish he explained what the Australian radio telescope can do, what it contributes to science...

[@Sp3rw3r]

What kind of explaination would you expect from someone that says space is closer to the USA? I guess it would be something like: "They will be listening for strange lifeforms in the universe. They should check Twitter."

[@zombieowen]

Is it funny?

[@ebybeehoney]

Too much time given to graphics.

[@jamiewatkins4178]

@cak01vej Thanks for the insight 👍

[@LindaC616]

@cak01vej that will stunk for people working there....but on the other hand, Australia

[@lidarman2]

Crocodile Dundee; "That's no radio telescope, (pulls out the Aussie radio telescope plans) Now that's a radio Telescope."

[@angelusmortis3150]

RIP Mars Lander Insight. 😢😢😢

[@stevefromsaskatoon830]

@David Wang who hurt you?

[@Salem_Gracian]

"You'll be able to vacation in space!" *Me barely managing to survive here on earth* "why you lyin?"

[@josemelendez8549]

His explanation of where Australia is something Herschel Walker might say

[@saved217]

AOC

[@bradleybarnett9545]

@@saved217 Australian Optical Commission

[@saved217]

@@bradleybarnett9545 Not even close.

[@samuela-aegisdottir]

Steven uses this jokes about the continent being in the bottom of the Globe quite often when he speaks about Australia. I would prefer more inventiveness from his team.

[@bradleybarnett9545]

@@samuela-aegisdottir aw, now, my true blue nation- Assiestralia- was always known as Downunder by Northern Hemisphericans, though I don't hear this much any more from comedians et al. As this is the greatest country in the world- without a need to be made great again- Orstralians have always enjoyed jokes at our expense- we can take it. For me, it's good to hear an old joke retold. There's a terrific reply here that tells the joke again visually. Enjoy.

[@inokainemis]

well another robot quote to make me tear up. first oppy with "my battery is low, and it's getting dark" now this.

[@anthonypetty9288]

Love that the 'alien joey' wanted to throw a crustacean on the flesh burning machine.

[@Synathidy]

I don't get it.

[@karenjohannessen8987]

@@Synathidy "Throw another shrimp on the barbie" ...

[@SpaceForceCommander]

Time for a new saying: “Women are from Neptune, Men are from Uranus”

[@marilynbables8071]

Flowers, trees, oceans, rivers, lakes and all the beauties of nature--no trade.

[@Opus313]

I imagine Hilton is taking some pointers from Japanese capsule hotels...

[@cameronsitton501]

So sorry to hear about the rover's passing. As a wise person once said, "caches to caches, rust to rust."

[@suzibikerbabe8073]

Rhu-roh!

[@DrachenGothik666]

Seriously underrated comment!🤣

[@generalZee]

I don't wanna point any paws here, but when my Roomba was murdered the culprit was furry and four-legged. But Benny's a good boy... right?

[@zaiologyy]

Vitamin Colbert is back in effect ! 🥂 Happy 2023 everyone

[@siriansight]

As an Aussie. I laughed 😅

[@shivamjaiswal439]

Don't you mean " pǝɥƃnɐl I ˙ǝᴉssnɐ uɐ s∀"?

[@bradleybarnett9545]

@@shivamjaiswal439 HOW DID YOU DO THAT¿

[@shivamjaiswal439]

@@bradleybarnett9545 Simple, I moved to Melbourne. (Kidding, just google "text flipper".)

[@bradleybarnett9545]

@@shivamjaiswal439 I did think you were going to say "I live in Wagga Wagga, it's always done that" Very cool.

[@shivamjaiswal439]

@@bradleybarnett9545 not that familiar with Australia 😅

[@WhatsNextwithNora]

I love Stephen's graphics team. Those computer nerds (meant with love and envy) must have so much fun 😍

[@jackson857]

Graphics team clearly had fun!

[@katoffeevhs9798]

the band deserves those upgrades! they are amazing

[@napoleonibonaparte7198]

Graphics department enjoying themselves clearly.

[@davidjosh5640]

😅Shit was heinous. I felt him cringing for the whole show. I sensed he was actually getting pretty annoyed, especially since the audience was pretty damn quiet

[@SpaceForceCommander]

It would be disappointing if the world’s largest radio astronomy observatory cannot be seen from space!

[@TheGreatAtario]

Everything can be seen from space, with the right glasses

[@Jay-ate-a-bug]

It should take up most of the Outback and serve a Blooming Onion Appetizer.

[@inhha]

This reminded me of the ongoing British celebrity iteration of The Weakest Link. Its joke writers seem to torment Romesh (Ranganathan, the host) with autocue puns he has never seen before and test his composure. For example, just a few days ago it looked like he almost started crying while reading the silliest and shittiest gag of the show "who thinks that Tom Hanks is short for 'Tom, hank you very much'?" Sometimes I wonder if Colbert has seen those animations before they show up. Adorable stuff 👏🏻

[@RealBradMiller]

That just popped up in my recommended and I saved it for later. Guess I'm going to watch it today... Also, Romesh was on Taskmaster, a UK show you HAVE to check out if you haven't had the pleasure!

[@inhha]

@@RealBradMiller I've seen every UK episode (except the most recent New Year special I watched yesterday) at least twice. Also most if not all seasons from Norway, Sweden, Denmark, New Zealand, Finland, Portugal, Quebec, Croatia... I probably forgot some, but yeah, I'm a huge TM nerd and even tried to like the awkward US attempt. Not every iteration manages to rock my socks off, but the format is just brilliant and so are you for recommending the OG 👍🏻

[@RealBradMiller]

@@inhha have not been able to find Portugal, Croatia or Quebec versions! The only thing that kept me interested in the American version was Ron Funches, he's just a bundle of sunshine. Good to see a fellow TM fan. 😁👍

[@inhha]

@@RealBradMiller Taskmaster's official YT channel has some international 1st seasons with subtitles. I think Horne hopes to make everything available for the very dedicated community, but different countries and licences . .

[@eliljeho]

I raised a glass for InSight

[@TheSupercorky]

your face trying to keep it together when graphics pop up ha ha ha

[@rachelh-j5006]

Oh, God, this is the funniest SPACE NEWS I have ever heard!!!!!!!!!!

[@kevinriddell2105]

The introduction reminded me of "Pigs in Space" from The Muppets TV show

[@Sp3rw3r]

I love space. Specially my space. I love it so much, I like to keep it to myself.

[@nanarose8537]

😂😆😂 💃💃💃💃 Thank you graphics department!

[@timschantz3233]

Louis has Paul Schaffer vibes.

[@BenjaminNelsonX]

The most attractive band in late night!

[@DrachenGothik666]

Loved the "Flat Earther" style logic of the Australian telescope segment! That had me rolling!🤣

[@SpaceForceCommander]

The prices of the Hilton Space Hotel mini bar will be astronomical! 💸💸💸💸💸

[@eudofia]

😀 I see what you did there

[@SpaceForceCommander]

Proof that it’s very difficult for life to exist in a runaway greenhouse atmosphere like Venus.

[@Historynerd42]

Proof it's difficult for our type of life, yes but the chances are there's many different kinds of life. Don't get me wrong, I think it's lifeless too. It's what earth looked like billions of years ago.

[@aaronolivas6970]

But not above the clouds though

[@scottblakey1603]

Surface temperature and methane atmosphere. Humans can't live there.

[@tr7b410]

My information-see Zohar Stargate T.V.Investigates the Meiers material,with lecture by Randolf Winters,Venus was pulled out of its previous orbit about 5k years ago close to the sun into its current orbit,rapidly burning off its ice mantle creating its runaway greenhouse gas atmosphere.

[@aaronolivas6970]

@scott blakey above the clouds in upper atmosphere temperatures and pressure are pretty close to earths all you would need is breathing mask

[@craighanson6335]

Stephen as a space cadet myself, do you know that voice effect you use is from the cartoon Space Ghost? (1960's)

[@crysstoll1191]

It's reverb and delay, used so much it's ubiquitous.

[@owenoulton9312]

I hear Hilton is getting Paris to do the interior design. After all, she's such a space cadet!

[@mariekamerdula7641]

I love the opposite seasons! ❤

[@NecroCritic]

The graphics team had way too much fun with this one.

[@Callipygous1975]

Watch for a KZbin video on "The Tragic Death of the Mars Lander". A real tear-jerker😒😭

[@vickybryan25]

Shoulda said ashes to ashes rust to rust lol

[@Everah.Snow.]

Did he just land a murderous humidifier joke? ❤😂

[@Grubbbee]

Abrupt ending, would have liked to hear a bit more about the Hilton thing

[@CRMcGee2]

And remember Pan Am was going to be the airline that was going to fly us to the Moon they even took advanced reservations.

[@sideshowbob]

"Throw another Crustacean on the Flesh Burning Machine" = took me a few sec's to "get" that one . . . .

[@Echo81Rumple83]

seeing those alien graphics is now making me wanna watch Paul again; that was funny af XD

[@LuisGonzalez-cq1nq]

SC made it awkward there for the band lol😂 #funny

[@rastatute42]

really should've been, "ashes to ashes, rust to rust"

[@hamzahbasir8277]

I really like Joe up front. He was a good sidekick.

[@IcewaterOasis]

Was that their subtle way of telling us that Jon Batiste isn't coming back? 🤔

[@adrienned5548]

Love space news

[@davidnelson4960]

Those claps ain't lying... Great job cold bear.

[@JoAnnaQuincey]

Space is truly everywhere

[@aaronspruance]

Not an Italian pizza shop, a Detroit based sandwich shop...come on writers! #HereFromSethMeyersCorrections

[@gwesco]

The Aussie bit was hilarious. Actually the Parkes Observatory in NSW played a very important role in the Apollo program. They were one of the 3 radio telescopes that carried the Apollo 11 video live. There is a fictional comedy movie called "The Dish" which recreates that event.

[@SARGENTO007A]

Good for you Louis Cato!!!

[@highstimulation2497]

omg the space news intro is awesome

[@bluemoon3264]

But you just said space is everywhere . 👁 .

[@aweenlee8246]

we all knew venus is a dead planet and this shouldn't be a shocker to anyone.

[@TheCrimsonS4ge]

There were a lot of talks about microbial life possibly surviving in the upper atmosphere. Life on Venus was unlikely, but never completely off the table.

[@Megalomaniakaal]

@Neil Deep It means we've confirmed Venus as free real-estate.

[@DarrinR]

@Neil Deep science is not a waste of money

[@TheCrimsonS4ge]

@Neil Deep, if you want to cut spending there are a LOT of other places to start. Trillions of dollars go into a big black hole at the CIA and the military with no auditing or accountability. Hundreds of billions are also basically given away in billionaire and corporate tax breaks and kick backs. If the government stops spending so much money on corruption and mismanagement, space research is EASILY affordable. Plus, if NASA's budget was suddenly cut, do you REALLY think that the money will go to education and health care.

[@OriginalPiMan]

@Neil Deep Venus is oddly one of the most suitable extraterrestrial locations for us to colonize. Surviving the surface is close enough to impossible no matter what we do, but the cloud layer with roughly equal air pressure to Earth at sea level also has temperatures about 20 above freezing. Airtight blimps on Venus might be more practical than a Mars colony.

[@seanys]

On behalf of all Australians… you bastard! 😂

[@MiguelRodriguez2010]

That intro space joke was under appreciated. Thought it was hilarious 😂

[@bromeusmoueix7904]

That hurt to watch :)

[@mr.deadman1973]

Science is cool!

[@jessebrown8519]

Still in 💗💕❣️ with Cowboy Drummer!🥰

[@marcusdupree3517]

That breaks my heart damn!!!! rip INSIGHT

[@l2etranger]

3:41 😂😂😂

[@pango-y8j]

I love Stephen cold beer

[@hardwarefixer6822]

I keep waiting for him to say Spaaaace Ghost

[@AvionBlackstone]

Gah! Why do they make all these mars robots so heart wrenching? 😢

[@thexalon]

Regarding space hotel proposals, somebody clearly hasn't read Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, where the hotel is overrun by Vermicious Knids.

[@joannejohnson7006]

You have the best of the best 😊

[@AchtungEnglander]

There was a Hilton booking service in the space station in 2001 A Space Odyssey

[@Earthneedsado-over177]

And the Howard Johnson's Earthlight Room.

[@josephclum7614]

Well if you watch meanwhile you know he's fascinated by racoons in his intro 🤣

[@bzert281]

So, a Hilton, at the Space Station? Can anyone say, "2001: A Space Oddysssey?"

[@MistressOnyaCox]

LoL yuk I just stayed at a "LaCunta"

[@joycediggs4617]

I like Louis Cato; he & the band are great 👍. However, I still miss my beloved Jon Batiste. ❤️

[@beez1717]

The dehumidifier in the library with the lead pipe That's how the roomba died.

[@jeffredfern3744]

Club Quarters would have been a better hotel for the joke. That place is grim.

[@maggiejackson2160]

Me, face-down on some very fluffy pillows in a La Quinta in Illinois: 😮

[@niXonc0x]

I wish I was in the writers room for the decision that we need the visual to get the Australia is further from space joke

[@PersianProfessional]

Louis Cado is a wonderful musician, but why did Jon leave again?

[@karenjohannessen8987]

@Tristan - I b'lieve his lady-wife had "medical issues" to deal with. Bright Blessings to All!

[@PersianProfessional]

@@karenjohannessen8987 that's what I heard too. I miss him dearly. Absolutely

[@CZpersi]

In space, nobody hears you laugh...

[@PaperbackWizard]

Hilton's been dreaming of doing this ever since Stanley Kubrick put a Hilton on his space station in 2001.

[@IMeMineWho]

This is so great.

[@necieau2700]

It's getting dark and my batteries are getting low

[@evenflowsteven]

Can I have Joe’s OLD drums? 😊😂

[@mal5678]

Ha ha the title of the news article!

[@kkp4373]

I miss John B and his tinkling the piano

[@TheTechnoElf]

Space is up, and the enemy's gate is down.

[@sarcasmo57]

Good space news Stephen.

[@maxvosper9420]

Really... a shrimp on the BBQ joke for Australia... how original 😆

[@PluribusProject]

Refigured band still sounds great. JB didn't need a sign so long as he had keys

[@solvseus]

Everything is in space, Morty!