Colleen Ballinger’s Ex TELLS ALL: Joshua David Evans EXCLUSIVE Interview what NO ONE Knew | Downfall

[@PettyUniversity]

I want to thank all of the victims who have shared, including Josh, as well as a huge thank you to my team, and to all of you watching, for your patience and kindness through the telling of these stories. I hope for nothing less than healing for everyone. > Get your new Petty University VALID apparel here! : bit.ly/PettyUniversity > Thank you to Kenzzi for supporting this series! use code SWOOP2 for 20% off! kenzzi.com/products/kenzzi-ipl-hair-removal-handset-2?ref=SWOOP2 > Subscribe to my 2nd channel: kzbin.info/door/Bj8fSqth8MhN-RhX9Y7f2g > Fing me on Instagram: bit.ly/3uXM1xC

[@fioregiallo]

💚💚💚💚

[@Lovelyteenlife]

We appreciate you so much swoop

[@danielsantiagourtado3430]

You're the Best SWOOP! Love your work and dedication 🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤❤❤

[@tameikajackson6887]

Thank you so much for your tireless work and support of victims. And I thank for making the rest of my shift an easier one.

[@Tasha.Bae1]

❤❤❤❤😅 good work swoop

[@bbfrfr44]

This is everything Colleen’s apology wasn’t: transparent, accountable, articulate, humble, and not sung to the tune of a comically tiny string instrument

[@mia-mf5xt]

Ikr, if Colleen did an apology video like this, I guarantee EVERYTHING would’ve been pushed aside by the next week and she would be making videos again by now. She really fucked herself over

[@twildabuckingham]

Don't you mean "Cawlleen"? 💀

[@mina_g10]

@ville__stop spamming mate Adam went thru so much, the videos 100% fake

[@904funny]

He’s known “Ukulele Colleen” for far longer

[@lindaferencik6791]

Colleen said her video WAS NOT an apology video. It was a video stating Adam and others were blowing things out of proportion etc. you know ... mostly for VIEWS - fame - money and attention. Ah, the Godlike power KZbin has when cancelling someone. It helps all of the followers feel so smug, and that their lives have more meaning even though many times this judging action - saturates you in negativity.

[@haileygoff579]

“She’s got kids, she’s got babies” was so real. That’s what it looks like to truly care about someone, even after everything he’s been through. That’s real human emotion.

[@Hinata8778]

I agree. That short sentence really made me feel some type of way. The sound of his voice was just so. Pained, because he knows how this will affect her kids since it's affecting her.

[@rachellefebres4183]

She shouldn’t she doesn’t deserve them

[@thefelicits]

It made me sad because she had no scruples about destroying his life. Still, it's good that she didn't crush his spirit and he's still capable of caring about even the worst people.

[@yingyang2838]

For some reason even though I have been waiting for Colleen’s downfall this hit me the most. Josh has so much compassion for someone who ruined his life. Her kids are precious I would hate to think how this affects them

[@undeuxtrois123]

The full responsibility is on Colleen, he has nothing to feel guilty for, he is allowed to speak up. Colleen was illegally sending and mocking Trisha's nudes while she was pregnant and even after she gave birth as A MOTHER. She didn't care how it would impact her children if it was exposed, if she did she wouldn't do that or her arrogant self thought she won't get exposed. She's a horrible, horrible individual and this interview really showed it

[@ailsagillies]

This interview is the perfect example of: "The truth doesn't mind being questioned; a lie does."

[@xiantree3081]

THIS

[@chelseahindle3645]

The contrast between Josh’s interview and Johnny’s is astounding for this very reason

[@horizon_upkm55]

Absolutely agree.

[@sassysince90]

EXACTLY 💯

[@undeuxtrois123]

She was never remorseful for what she did anyway. Even if she comes back her "apology" will be fake and not genuine. I hope she doesn't come back so that her kids have their privacy and not on camera every single day. She can go make money in a more ethical way instead of exploiting people around her.

[@yunochiii]

Seeing Colleen talk about her ex to a bunch of children in a group chat should basically tell you everything you need to know about her emotional baseline

[@jessp8238]

Absolutely 😂

[@Lucifersfursona]

Colleen projecting her abuse onto Josh as coming from him and begging for pity from the minors she was grooming

[@hotflippinmess9178]

Flying monkeys. Those poor fans were used just like he was.

[@IssaMomThingCT]

It’s like the teacher that would come into class and talk about their personal life for the first 15 mins of class. “ miss I just want to turn in my homework.” Coleen reminds me of those teachers that that gets their students to harm their husband.

[@eternallybroken]

150%%%%%%%

[@KorinnaSimone]

This is probably the internets greatest apology. Real accountability, no downplaying the situation, no talking in circles, being honest and genuinely remorseful. Way to go, Josh. 👏

[@burymewithabook]

❤

[@lunamonetmonroe]

It’s very clear he has put a tremendous amount of work in on himself. His transparency & vulnerability in search of healing for everyone involved *absolutely* is admirable.

[@JJhhh-wb6sg]

You have to be kidding. Both Colleen and him sound fake. He was married to her that long. I think neither one of them deserve praise. Everything he’s said is from his perspective with no actual facts.

[@LizardKingRequiem]

@@JJhhh-wb6sgokay, then give the facts then. 😐 Right, you have none, nothing to add, nothing to say.

[@darcy230]

​@@JJhhh-wb6sgactually facts? Ok how is it not facts? Wth? And yh this particular situation is being said by his perspective BUT that's because Colleen won't even talk about it and he hasn't lied or manipulated any of what he has said.

[@sunnyjim1223]

The fact that Joshua didn’t air her dirty laundry and still doesn’t wish her ill AND takes accountability for doing gross stuff, owns up to his blind shops, and shows personal growth . . . that’s the internet apology we’ve been waiting for. All you need is a little integrity and perspective, no grey hoodie or anything.

[@JohnGardnerAlhadis]

Grey hoodie?

[@vincentbardai1096]

@@JohnGardnerAlhadisit’s a joke that a lot of influencers will put on a grey hoodie in apology videos as a way to make themselves seem more down to earth (like wearing the usual expensive clothes would make them seem super disingenuous). “Grey hoodie” is just like a synecdoche for “bad apology video” like “big sigh” and “leaving in your turning on/off the camera”

[@JohnGardnerAlhadis]

@@vincentbardai1096 Ah, gotcha. Thanks!

[@yalebowles30]

​@@vincentbardai1096or like in 90's sitcoms where the adults would sit on a chair backwards to seem hip with the kids.

[@michewi]

It's like not a fact though. It's action. Don't go confusing the two. An action can be calculated a fact is also calculated and then hypothesized on and then recalculated and then reevaluated etc. Body language is not a science

[@SarahGHilton]

“I want my life and I wanna protect it, my wife deserves it, my little dog deserves it” That’s so profound in a simple way, props to Josh for pulling himself out of the rubble.

[@CherrrrBear]

Report the spam

[@11Christys11]

@ville__go away. Your name should be Vile

[@PhoenIXPhantasies]

@ville__ Stop spamming fake news. And stop victim blaming! It's not tolerated on this channel.

[@DaggerJay9]

@ville__ Adam really needs someone to track Ville's IPS And sue him.

[@ValentinoQ]

Lmfao his dog? How would it know? Dogs don’t even let that long 🤣🤣😂

[@TheMinimalistTherapist]

I am a therapist. Joshua David Evans has shown here how abuse happens by a thousand tiny cuts that no one sees, how boundaries are pushed incrementally slowly and how this becomes normalised, how stressful cognitive dissonance is when the safety and success of so many areas of your life feel like they are on the line. I can see how much complex rationalisation he was putting himself through and how, at times, when 2 ideals clashed (eg wanting to please his wife when he felt "less than" in the relationship and wanting to please the fans even when he was aware it felt "off") and how he found himself simply accepting the unacceptable in order to get through that moment. Living at this level of constant psychological stress eventually becomes traumatic. Its too *much* to live with that level of hypervigilence. So I admire his ability to acknowledge his misdemeanours and accept them without making excuses. That must be an incredibly uncomfortable thing to have to turn and face publicly. I think this was a very good interview by Swoop. I hope Joshua is able to find peace within himself going forward because it sounds like he's been to hell and back.

[@JoshuaDTV]

This assessment absolutely hit home with me. Thank you for taking the time to share it.

[@TheMinimalistTherapist]

@@JoshuaDTV Joshua, you are so welcome. The hard therapeutic work you must have done was clear to me. I salute your bravery and wish you all the very very best in your ongoing recovery and post traumatic growth. Warmest wishes.

[@joylox]

"...a thousand tiny cuts that no one sees..." That's so validating to my experience. While nothing related to this situation or that intense, I have struggled a lot with my experiences being invalidated because there weren't any big events in my life that caused trauma, but rather many repeated small things that happened as a kid. It wears you down, you get to a point when you're just trying to not make it worse, and hoping for whatever way out you can find. I can't imagine how much harder that process would be when you have fans looking to you, and so many more people in your life with expectations and their own ideas being shared. It's hard to stand up for yourself and your goals to move forward, but it's so worth it, and a big step in healing, at least it was for me.

[@kobra4422]

That's very valuable comment. Abuse doesn't have to be this huge event(s). More often than not it's very covert that's why people get confused. If someone beats you society agrees that it's not okay. But other forms of abuse of power get off the radar. It's like it's possible to die from violent attack but it's also possible to die from hemorrhage that we don't feel. The result is the same.

[@Ellie-vb9vm]

Wow this interview happened on my birthday, yo. Jeez

[@march_dismal4718]

For a man accused of horrific things such as grooming and abuse, i’ve never seen someone so forthcoming, transparent and quick to take accountability for everything put in front of him. No excuses, no sidestepping or deflection. I’ve never known an abuser to be so.. willing to admit to their every fault

[@henotic.essence]

THIS

[@maryssaann]

So well said. And typically means he’s not an abuser or groomer. Most try to adamantly try to hide that side of them at all costs.

[@SnekkySnake]

He's a good guy, being selflessly aware, what a fuckin gem he is, restores my faith in humanity he does

[@laaurenduh]

@@maryssaanni think he was a victim of colleen and she manipulated him or put him in a mindset to be comfortable doing the same things she did with her fans. i saw this saying that said, there’s never an excuse, but always an explanation and i think that goes with this situation.

[@nunnunnunyabizzie2345]

I have been waiting for his redemption since 2016. I was never really a fan of his, or colleen's for that matter, but I watched their videos back in the day. I watched everything unfold after that divorce that was made public but I knew she was a bad person way before that from their vlogs. The way she treated him, the look on her face at their wedding, the horrible digs at him about his career - she was emotionally abusive. It was clear as day that Josh was just this goofy guy who wanted to be a pop star and he got smashed to bits by Colleen. People forget this but I really want to emphasise it - Colleen did not attack Josh publicly directly, ***SHE GOT TRISHA TO DO IT***. Trisha would make horrendous videos slandering Josh as Colleen had fooled her into believing they were besties. The stuff Trisha said was absolutely vile towards Josh with zero evidence. I remember a video he made, very visibly dishevelled and shaken by the whole thing and struggling with rapid weight gain, that he could say A LOT about the situation with Trisha, but he held himself back and said he wasn't going to do it. He said nothing even though he was very much in pain, even when everyone was attacking him, even when it was the time to say EVERYTHING. But he never stooped that low. His integrity went ignored, but I never forgot. I am so glad he is getting heard and that his redemption day has finally come. I'm just some asshole stranger/lurker on the internet, same age-ish as Josh, but I never forgot it and I am so fucking here for this karma. I hope this eases his soul, and that he and Pamela can finally move on.

[@susanstevenson3532]

This took guts. In an era of buzzword, pr-machine-non-apologies, how utterly refreshing and human to hear someone admit, “I knew it wasn’t right, but I was selfish and was benefiting from it and didn’t want to lose that.” I hope this man can now enjoy the peaceful life he fought for.

[@boricuabeautykk]

And the way that he fully accepted each incident. Like, he said, "It was in London," before she even said she thought it was in Europe. He didn't try to hem and haw like he didn't remember the situation but, rather, owned up before the question was even done. And his very upfront, "I was selfish," was extremely refreshing in the Era of non-apologies.

[@dings7301]

​@ville__god damn I've seen this comment so many times stop it

[@Jaxxxxxxxxxxxxxy]

P ​@@dings7301

[@sallyostling]

I'm? Bn

[@pmac5445]

I’ve never believed the garbage being spewed at josh for years simply because Julien and Jenna took his side during the divorce. That spoke volumes to me. And now we finally get to hear his side and it’s heart breaking. It completely aligns with everything we have been hearing about Coleen. She sounds like such a nasty mean girl

[@alysonscanvases]

In a world full of Colleen Ballenger’s, I wish there were more Jenna Marbles’ 😢. I’m so sad she removed herself still but I absolutely understand why, especially if this was the culture behind the scenes

[@snowytits]

Can you tell me how they took his side? I didn't know about colleen or Josh at the time so I didn't see what they said or did that was taking his side

[@nabishie]

I remember either on one of his vlog or on the j&j podcast julien mentioned about hanging out with josh sometime after the divorce happened

[@FIRING_BLIND]

Oh shit I never knew that

[@reallyreaally]

I have to say I agree with you. I had watched Jenna grow up on this app and I know her heart to be true. I know that if she cared for Joshua then he was righteous. This hurt my heart to see the pain he was going through and is still going through. I wish him healing and a beautiful future.

[@spiralflash6169]

The way he feels like he has to protect her is so indicative that he was the victim of domestic abuse. 😔

[@sweeetener0]

Colleen is a proven domestic abuser. multiple witnesses on the colleen snark reddit said that colleen was physically abusive to josh constantly.

[@cosmicredeemer3109]

That’s cause he is

[@FocusedFighter777]

​@@cosmicredeemer3109 That's what we are saying....

[@FocusedFighter777]

More guys now are starting to know what this feels like. "Why didnt u leave" Why this why that etc. Usually it's women going through that BS. He went through the same process "its my fault", "but I love her" etc., but he wasnt the problem. The same women go through.

[@cosmicredeemer3109]

@@FocusedFighter777 Did the Johnny Depp case not teach society anything?

[@bernienelson8926]

It is so refreshing to hear this level of accountability. When Swoop says, "this behaviour, which you were involved in, was really inappropriate and disturbing," and Josh answers with, "you're right, it was unacceptable and should never have happened. I'm ashamed that it did." No, "well, you don't actually understand the situation." No, "well, I was a different person back then." No, "well, I didn't know any better." Josh is giving us reasons so that we understand, but no excuses. He's being grilled like a well-done steak, and he is not flinching. This is what accountability looks like.

[@lenaboyer6981]

doing an interview like this and speaking with such clarity and awareness requires both self-esteem AND humility, which is probably why we see so little of it from public figures. idk what exactly he worked on in therapy but i commend him for it because it shows

[@carolineculbertson878]

Also, can we give it up to Swoop for holding his feet to the fire with such direct, even pressure and unshakeable composure? It is not an understatement to call her the Gayle King of our generation 🙌🙌🙌

[@lenaboyer6981]

@@carolineculbertson878 I’ve seen few interviewers who are as thoughtful and level-headed as she is, it kinda blew me away.

[@christiekeller1252]

Sñ Jo

[@alim.9801]

​@@carolineculbertson878 she's fantastic. She seems very fair, she offers great questions, and she seems to actual care about people and her craft. It's cool to see

[@CandySoulAndSoil]

The fact he didn’t go after her money, didn’t air her dirty laundry to grow on social media and just left to heal says all you need to know. I’m so sorry what you went through Josh! ❤

[@SuperNuclearUnicorn]

I feel pretty confident saying that most people in his situation would have jumped at the chance to appear all over mainstream media, ready to the world that she was a manipulative asshole who not only constantly belittled you, but cheated multiple times and then used legal threats and her massive following to ensure you never told anyone The fact that he ignored requests from major networks that probably promised a decent payday and only sat down with a KZbinr who has no reason to believe him, and who has made it extremely clear that she won't take it easy on him makes me think of a man with nothing to hide anymore

[@craigharmon9494]

He couldn't support himself in his own talent? Hmm. Why not?

[@hernameispekka_Rebecca]

​@@craigharmon9494most people trying to work on entertainment can't. Not purely from being an entertainer. Not a him thing, a career choice thing.

[@CherrrrBear]

Exactly 100%

[@hchau-222]

​@ville__lol....

[@SnowCat-nu7gj]

For the record as a queer person the advice he gave Johnny about not coming out is the exact same I would give in that situation. It is awful that we often have to live in the closet at times but survival comes first. Saying if you are not certain you would be safe to come out while living with parents do not do it until you can comfortably stand on your own two feet is the correct thing to say. Living in the closet sucks but it is better than living on the streets and in the worst scenarios it is better than being killed or assaulted. It is so gross to see that being weaponised against him. Saying make sure your safe first is the responsible thing to tell someone in that situation.

[@kristajones7202]

THANK YOU! I've given that advice to queer youth still dependent on their parents, and I'm queer as well. It really sucks, but sometimes the closet is the safest place to be.

[@sophiaec2607]

Same, I'm gay and have echoed similar things. Always safety first.

[@hernameispekka_Rebecca]

I'm not queer (well, it's a whole thing I'm figuring out) nor have I been put in this situation, but this was my understanding as well. That the recomended steps are always first make sure you're safe, second make sure you have somewhere to flee to or a backup if things go sideways etc. Like... other than the "that's got nothing to do with me" kneejerk, his response seems textbook to the kind of advice you're taught to give.

[@DavyThomas88]

You are 100% right - plus, sexuality is private, and people can come out, or NOT come out, to whoever they want whenever they want. Ain’t nobody’s business but yours.

[@skylinesandturnstiles9595]

yes exactly, its real advice. kind of the basics at this point

[@molleirose]

This, this is a man. He acknowledged his fuck ups, and owned up to them. He tried to keep the peace, and now even while speaking out, is still showing compassion for someone that put him through hell. I am genuinely proud of him. Im glad he's with Pamela, and i hope they're doing well. She seems very kindhearted. Im glad they're okay

[@madeleinereads]

Same here. It's a shame that he is the only person in this situation who tried to take accountability, but I am glad that he has tried to take accountability to own up to his mistakes and the things he did wrong. I just wish that Colleen, Kory, Johnny, and Trent would do the same.

[@chickinskinz]

This is the most sincere apology & taking of accountability that I have ever seen on KZbin. There was no victim blaming, no “I’m sorry, but,” no pussyfooting around. Josh was in depth, explained how he came to where he was wrong & genuinely owning up to his actions. It’s not easy to talk about let alone open up on the level he did. I commend u, Josh. We’re standing with u.

[@sarboee77]

I love that I'm not the only person that still says "pussyfooting around" haha

[@chickinskinz]

@@sarboee77 the use of the term has definitely dissipated lol

[@louis.p808]

To me the best (to the point of noble and overcorrection) is Jenna Marbles’, but this is great too.

[@trinitybernhardt9944]

She didn't show him any mercy either. I totally understand why that was necessary, but it was hard. It is hard not to try and defend yourself when someone comes that hard, even if you are sorry, but he was ready to take accountability. I admit I wasn't familiar with him before, so I didn't know what he was gonna be apologizing for. I think he has grown up and I hope he can leave this behind and find peace.

[@C0nejaa]

@ville__boooooooooooo

[@shanr6270]

Honestly I don’t really see Josh being at fault for much.. but the accountability he takes shows he is a fully evolved, self aware, high emotional intelligence individual. This is more rare than I think people realize. I hope him and his wife have peace and can continue their lives without interruption

[@rat6508]

I agree I thought some of the “grilling questions” while I agree… seemed to be reaching in ways. This is Colleen’s shit… and he seemed to have been sadly tied along to it… and despite that he took accountability.

[@Cairo198]

why does Josh have to apologize for making a rap parody? should Weird Al apologize for "white and nerdy"? Should Jon Lajoie apologize for "Regular everyday normal guy"?

[@registeredjopper]

​@Cairo198 yeah, no. the internet is just kind of obsessed with making people apologize for anything.

[@miamaru414]

@@Cairo198the rap parody isn’t even uniquely offensive or anything. it’s just making fun of stereotypical things you see in rap music videos.

[@Lawam12]

Agree, lots of reaching.

[@user-oi9ej8bk4v]

it’s clear that josh has worked SO hard on himself and to overcome the trauma he’s endured. major respect

[@LynetteTheRogue]

I feel like there are not enough conversations around people who do the work and become better people. That not to minimize the real harm their actions cause but it is so refreshing to see someone who put in the work and willing to take accountability rather than bury it in denial

[@shannonlaforme8344]

@@LynetteTheRogueI couldn’t agree more. These days there are not enough people putting in the work, all we get are cringe internet apologies. For those who put in the work and are genuinely better people, there’s not enough recognition or forgiveness.

[@Exorcist364xs]

@@shannonlaforme8344 I know he went along with bad things. But the abuse he went through my god, my heart just breaks for him. There are not enough men who come forward with mental abuse or just abuse in general. He obviously feels terrible and he has had to had an enormous amount of therapy. I believe him, I had never heard of these two until recently. That woman Colleen is pure evil. It takes a very strong person to admit to have gone along with things they knew were wrong but seeing how broken down he got it’s not unbelievable how he allowed it to happen. Sorry if I keep going on but this just hurts my heart.

[@cosmicredeemer3109]

Am I noticing parallels with Johnny Depp

[@madeleinereads]

Yes. Josh did not deserve all the hate that came his way. Also, I respect Josh for trying to take accountability. Like Swoop said, unlike every other adult in this story, he is the only adult who is speaking up and is willing to take accountability.

[@ellab2446]

2:23:12 the fact he immediately took your correction to what he was doing as racist and didn't even argue it for a second was so satisfying to watch. THAT is accountability; being able to admit and understand why what you did was wrong, but also listening to how it affected others and fully validating that. this was just one specific example but it's been displayed throughout this whole doc and it's just so refreshing to see

[@molleirose]

You could see on his face how much he hated that he did it. "Racist, yeah" immediately grossed out by his own actions.

[@vicki9298]

Yes

[@JoshSweetvale]

You wanna be cool, be loved, be adored? That's how you do it.

[@ultimategameredits]

I don’t think the video is racist tho? Check the comments of it, most people agree that at the most it’s a micro aggression. Just my opinion, please don’t come for me. 😭

[@easonbrown7255]

Do you mean 2:22:50?

[@frodogabbins]

I'd like to acknowledge and praise Josh's directness. He doesn't try to shirk ANY responsibility. He directly said yes that was racist, or yes that was wrong, while also apologizing for the hurt he caused and the wish he could retroactively change things. This is how you take accountability.

[@karenholmes6565]

I am so glad that the response of most people is to support Josh. The only innocent victims in this world are children. And abusers know this. It is easier to DARVO an imperfect victim.

[@animec-dramaskpop6362]

I support Josh 100% and appreciate that he didn't even try to make excuses for it. Ppl have said and done things that they will never repeat and so have I. Nobody is perfect but hopefully everyone is willing or open to growth and change.

[@Elkura_xo]

💯

[@zaramikazuki8374]

@@karenholmes6565 Same - especially in his case. His situation has so many shades of gray, especially considering his own power dynamic and abuse under Colleen - but even despite that, he acknowledged that he still had some agency, made his own mistakes, and took accountability. I hope he continues down that path and I wish him and his wife well.

[@Chelle8847]

Absolutely. It almost made me emotional in parts of this interview, just because of the way he totally took accountability and apologised, and truly meant it. He was so direct, to the point, and also very well spoken, very clear with his words. We just don't see this type of accountability happen very often, which is a sad fact. I do hope Josh is able to move on from this and I'm so happy that everyone seems to be in total support and have respect for him, and i really hope he can sleep better at night knowing that the truth has come out and he doesn't have to fight anymore. The abuse he dealt with while he was with Colleen is sickening, and the whole John thing just makes me so totally infuriated. Those two are just absolutely disgusting people, and it's almost scary to find out/see the manipulation that both of them are capable of. I do wonder about Eric, what does he think about all this, or is he just totally complicit? I guess we'll never know!

[@caitlinbroome8519]

Am I the only one who doesn't think what he did "wrong" was even that bad. Seems like a good guy who was in an abusive relationship who was forced to go along with things because he was punished if he didn't. So he rationalized the situation and just assumed it was normal and what all the KZbinrs did and behaved. Compared to what Colleen was doing and saying he really didn't do anything that bad.

[@d6mafia13]

100%

[@LindseyDrennan]

Yeah especially the Johnny situation. This guy is acting like he recruited him into a cult of something, and is really putting a lot of expectation on Josh and what he should do for him which is kind of unfair.

[@caitlinbroome8519]

​@@LindseyDrennanright I just am getting to the johnny part . N as someone who was raised in a Christian church I can 100% see where Josh was coming from. I have seen that sorta thing before. I've seen people who give their number to "troubled youths" as they would say to try to be there for them in the hopes they would come be a part of the church and improve their lives and help them outta a bad situation. I feel like Josh had nothing but good intentions with Johnny.

[@trae74]

Agreed 😅

[@wingsoffreedom3589]

Me too even this music video sounds like a cringe skit racist is thrown around too much though I haven't seen it. Several of these accusations seem overblown.

[@SirenAngelique]

I literally cried when he was talking about Colleen disrespecting his boundaries like it was just "playful" and you pointed out his body language. Seeing people minimize their trauma while their body is trying to be as small and safe as possible always breaks my heart. Thank you for helping to give ALL victims the voice they deserve

[@averyjasper]

“Seeing people minimize their trauma while their body is trying to be as small and safe as possible” oooof. I felt that. I’ve described my abuse as trying to fit into an ever shrinking box. Yeah. That sentence hit different.

[@rikkirikki4892]

@SusNation90why are you commenting this everywhere

[@Jess-on-the-Tube]

@@averyjasper funny you should say that. For the whole "give me one word to describe how this made you feel", in the space of silence where I was looking at Josh & trying to second-guess his answer, the one that came to me was "he feels small". Small & afraid & completely uncared for, and I don't know how Swoop managed to keep her game face on through some of that. 😥

[@Dani-Claw]

​@SusNation90Cope and seethe

[@cloudedey3s582]

I definitely had to take a moment when that part came up because my abuser used the same excuse. And because I was so young and all I had ever known was how he treated me, he was able to get away with extreme physical abuse but would say he was "just playing" so i grew up thinking i was wrong for not liking playing around bc it was what were kids supposed to want. I still have days where I cannot fathom why I ever thought these absolutely horrendous things were okay, but because they were dismissed as being playful my entire life I normalized it my whole life. It's an excuse that can really fuck with someone's mental health in the long rung

[@brooklynnbailey4356]

Every time I see a comment saying "Colleen is innocent" I report it for "misinformation" & I giggle a lil 😂

[@bhargavipba]

😂😂

[@nebula541]

thank you for your important service to our society 🙏🙏

[@okami_eddy]

As you should

[@ladyhella7560]

That's the pettiness I love XD

[@A-DISTINGUISHED-DOCTOR]

Toxic gossip train chugging down the tracks of ✨ misinformation✨😂😂😂

[@rachel_haley]

Over a million views within 24 hours and it's Joshua sharing his story. Over a MILLION people have heard his story. Truly a moment of beauty rising from ashes (something good coming out of such a horrible situation). Sorry Colleen, all power is lost and you're stuck with your own inflated ego.

[@AshleysPZ]

👏 ONE MILLION people have heard his story. Whoa. That sentence is so impactful.

[@kaseypb]

@ville__plonk

[@krzysiektr6]

@ville__ get lost.

[@karowalker5254]

@ville__painu vittuu

[@bee1411]

@ville__ Are you alright? I’m sorry you’re in this still. :( It isn’t too late to make friends who don’t use you in this way.

[@savl29]

God, his pain is palpable. You can see it in his eyes throughout the ENTIRE interview. My heart goes out to him and Pamela.

[@Lackingwanderlust]

Mine too. He’s worked so hard to put his life back together. I sincerely hope he and Pamela can live in peace.

[@fadalerabrasool3563]

I saw it especially around the part where he discusses the extent of colleens nastiness towards him. Colleen is such an evil person where no one who she has hurt has forgiven her. Honestly I agree what she has done is unforgivable and ireedemable

[@spreadlove5771]

You can hear the therapy he went through

[@savl29]

@@spreadlove5771 YES!! That too

[@fadalerabrasool3563]

​@ville__Yeah yeah whatever. Choo choo the toxic gossip train

[@kaemincha]

You can tell Josh has put in the work towards his recovery. People in recovery are some of the most strong, in-touch, truthful people I have ever met.

[@ladyhella7560]

I can't even imagine recovering from this. At the start I was like: How bad can this be; and quickly passed to OMG, what is this. And listening him saying that he just normalized it and he regrets doing it, it is so conflicting. I clearly have the explanation, but damn, this stuff is indeed hard to listen and I can't imagine growing up and finally realizing how fucked up it is.

[@BleedingGrafitti]

Josh is the perfect example of what a legitimate sincere apology from an influencer looks like. It takes serious guts to admit what you've done wrong to the world when many others would just squirm and twist things around to make themselves look less and less bad.

[@allyfrankhouser]

@ville__there is something very wrong with you for trying to profit off real victims.

[@Dingesis]

@ville__ stopped reading at "uncool"

[@relatablewhitegirl5700]

Not to mention he has had the time to sit and reflect and work on himself. Colleen and johnny haven't done that

[@maggiekarabel123]

This was brave.

[@Brooklyntrash]

Unlike most “apologies” which usually boil down to someone parroting “I was in a dark place and made some mistakes,” Josh is someone who truly was in a dark place. But he really took an unflinching moral inventory of his actions, and with the help of therapy and Pamela (who sounds terrific) he pulled himself back up into the light. And there’s none of that “I made a mistake” crap; Josh admits when he did something wrong and why he did it. Too bad the other adults in this sordid story - especially Colleen - are unwilling do the same.

[@archermaj]

Can't imagine how difficult it must be to publicly admit to things you feel shame over and genuinely own up to it and apologize for it. Amazing interview.

[@KittyCat22976]

I have been thinking the same!! I’m so glad he felt with Swoop a Safe Space to bare his soul. Truly Amazing.

[@e_aa518]

same, this was such a vulnerable thing to do. i think it shows swoops character that he was so open and honest - she much be a very welcoming and kind person.

[@KinseyTaylor-gm4lg]

I have lower I.Q. Then Colleen (I have an invisible disability) But my gosh, at least I can understand right from wrong and take accountability and apologize. That will take me much further in life probably. I don’t want to say anything for Colleen, or shame, but I just want people to take that in. Yikes.😬

[@KinseyTaylor-gm4lg]

@ville__uh, Ok. 😕 Want to finish typing the end colon?

[@Astaraea]

I'm so glad he was honest and said "no" when you asked if he forgave her. There's a misconception that you have to forgive your abuser to heal. You don't. Forgiveness is a personal choice and if the person who hurt you hasn't earned your forgiveness there is nothing unhealthy about not giving it to them and you shouldn't feel any shame for not feeling like you can.

[@Chef.Excellence]

Yesss. My abuser has never shown a lick of sincere remorse and so I don't think she's owed any forgiveness. Like I don't sit around and stew and focus in on it, I don't wish harm on her, but that person wronged me in ways that have affected and derailed my entire life. I am allowed to be angry or resentful about that occasionally.

[@shinakohana]

It took me a long time to accept this truth… My gran kept telling me to automatically forgive everyone who hurt me. Why? For self peace? Because you said it will help? No. It didn’t help and I will never forgive some people…

[@Vixa_Jaz]

THIS^^ as someone who has cptsd and doesn’t believe in forgiveness this is so important. I will never forgive the people who have hurt me, they chose to do those things it wasn’t a mistake, it was a choice. I feel so intense empathy for abuse victims

[@kittymilkyyy]

Honestly thank you.. i was told i needed to forgive for my own sake but i can't. Those scars are too deep. Itll be worse to forgive

[@kennyl4699]

Forgiveness is - and always should be - an option that the wronged/abused party chooses if they feel like they can do so and want to do so.

[@user-bj7em4fv1p]

Kudos to Swoop for being so compassionate and professional. Having a crisis counselor on set should be industry standards in this type of interviews.

[@jennydinh13]

Can we just appreciate the transition from Johnny’s “This was my ticket to success, my ticket to happiness, no one could take it away from me…” to Josh’s “Johnny, my whole world and career crashed to the ground. Where was I gonna take you? What did you expect me to do? There was nothing to take you to.” All without even hearing Johnny’s interview. I couldn’t help but giggle a bit.

[@indiashante1560]

Right lol

[@mia_abfab]

Same lol

[@jasminv8653]

Really speaks to how instrumental and deluded johnny's view of josh as a person was, also clear in the way he's since been hell-bent on punishing him for not giving him what he wanted.

[@Ashbrash1998]

That rung out to alot

[@ZijnShayatanica]

The difference in character from what Johnny believes to how Josh actually presents himself is startling.

[@TheHahafunnyguy]

20 minutes in and I didn't think I could respect Swoop any more than I already do. Having a trained crisis counselor on set is SO telling about how much Swoop respects and values mental health of anyone, regardless of their story.

[@jenniewalker6651]

@@rachel_haley I hope you don't mind if I offer a perspective about why I think it was good that she did mention it. Firstly, it is an open acknowledgement that she had someone on set for Josh, and people who might want to attack her for making these documentaries and say "oh she talked to him for seven hours straight and he might have said things out of [negative emotion]" are given the knowledge that there was a neutral party that could advocate for him. I think it's also a way of demonstrating a level of what to do for others that want to make docuseries in the future. If you're going to have a sit down interview with someone who has allegedly gone through an abusive situation, she helps set a bar of "this is something you should do." She does often include quotes from those in the interviews about how good and respectful she is at interviewing, but I do think that it shows others who might want to get into the field that this is a good way to make your interviewee feel comfortable while also asking hard questions.

[@ohreally1997]

The "crisis counselor" is hysterical. I'm glad Swoop's investment in those optics is paying off. Imagine gaining clout from having the equivalent of a Mental Health First Responder on standby.... for a youtube interview. The WWE vibes sent me. Someone like Dr Phil is required to have crisis counselors available to his guests to appease the production liability insurance underwriter (especially as his psuedo-theraputic premise really makes his billion dollar production company/studio vulnerable to lawsuits), but to announce the presence of a crisis counselor in this context is truly just a matter of optics. Not saying Swoop doesn't genuinely care about mental health (she obvs does), or that the subject matter isn't difficult/traumatic to rehash (obvs it is), but how is a crisis counselor truly going to assist Josh on the spot? What ACUTE mental health emergency is going to arise that it's necessary to have a CRISIS counselor on standby? Are they going to walk Josh through an emergency guided meditation if he starts to have a panic attack or what? I mean if you really think the concept all the way through, if it's NOT just a matter of optics for Swoop, if it's genuinely that she thought a crisis counselor was a necessary safeguard, is this interview even ethically responsible? If you're about to knowingly conduct an interview with a 39yo adult that is potentially SO emotionally compromised (ie the trauma is so triggering, lacking the coping skills necessary, etc) that he may *realistically* need an emergency mental health intervention during the course of the interview, doesn't that make the entire premise just a little problematic?

[@hernameispekka_Rebecca]

@@ohreally1997 I disagree. If he gets triggered and has a mental health crisis, that might be something this person can handle better. But also, the biggest part is that this person would be able to advocate for Josh if they felt he was not able to himself. He alluded to isolating himself and we don't know how his trauma shows itself in his health. Having a neutral party being able to step in if Swoop gets carried away or miss something, or someone to make Josh feel more comfortable speaking up if he needs time.

[@ArDeeMee]

@@ohreally1997 Is this you basically complaining over someone providing a box of tissues in case tears start happening?

[@meggisamachine]

I'm a therapist in training and I think it's amazing that she has a mental health professional on set.

[@WindyHorse2662]

As a Midwestern born and raised person when Josh spoke about it being normal for an adult mentoring a child or young adult, that's 100 percent true. I was a part of a group called Big Brothers Big Sisters and that was the whole premise of the group. It was completely innocent in my experience as a youth and an adult. This whole interview felt very honest to me. Thank you both for this!

[@CasacaraDFP]

Yup! I was a big sister in the program years ago and it was such an amazing experience. The mentality of looking after younger ones still stands with me, ESPECIALLY after becoming a parent myself. I get that there was a bit of a power dynamic in this situation and if Josh was just a random person, it wouldn't have escalated the way it did, but I believe Josh when he says his intentions were good.

[@aina3387]

Yeah, I grew up about 2 hours away from Josh and although he's not Christian anymore, he always gave me "youth pastor" vibes and I'm sure all he was trying to do was be a mentor like had been modeled in his life.

[@musicmary1331]

As someone who also used to go to Youth groups same

[@Prairie_Gypsy]

I actually brought this up in a comment, stating that big brother and big sister, Boys and girls clubs, etc. Will all get a bad rap due to grooming allegations where there was in all actuality a need for these programs and an important for children.

[@unicornL]

Absolutely

[@apocketfulofprose]

I have such respect for how you handled this interview, Swoop, and the fact that you had a crisis counselor on hand speaks volumes. Also, I want to echo what other commenters are saying about how much work Josh has put in. I have so much respect for that and where he is at right now as well. I wish him the absolute best for him, his mental health moving forward, and his family.

[@KinseyTaylor-gm4lg]

Agreed. Nothing but well wishes to him and his family, too. This video made me want to just give him a friendly hug. Like, uh. 😢But I hope either Josh will see this, or not, but know that we hope he can move on (But not forget) to a better future. And happier.

[@athena6653]

I am beyond impressed by how composed he is. He has been accused of horrific things, his name and reputation wrongly dragged through the mud, been told he is even worse than his abuser. Yet he has so much grace and maturity. I wish him nothing but the absolute best.

[@kanachanwhisper7174]

I think he has really grown as a person, also therapy helps to put a lot into a perspective.

[@sagew1312]

It's clear he put a ton of work into who he is as a person. He laid everything out on the table and didn't (for the most part) hold back. It felt more like a call in than a call out.

[@brandienicolle9738]

@ville__ You didnt prove anything, i saw your half ass made video

[@nikki4803]

Especially knowing how scared he was to do this as he stated more than once

[@Seevawonderloaf]

I agree. I don't think i could have taken this calmly

[@sevhells]

This is the rare example of actual apology. No "ifs", no "buts", no "I was hurt too and that exonerates me". The acknowledgement of "yes, that is racist". "I didn't see it at the time, that action was wrong." The quality of person Josh has chosen and chooses to be under circumstances I wouldn't even wish on his ex... it's astounding. Also, the example of how all interviews into deep personal topics should be conducted. The goal is truth, the careful wording and presentation of each question, the team of three people still going through the expense of having a trained counselor, ... the SWOOP team is becoming my golden standard.

[@michewi]

I feel insane from this comment. I feel like all I heard was "because"

[@1221sabmur]

He’s so dismissive of everything he’s done. Tons of back walking

[@drownzi]

@@1221sabmurwhere??? he’s owning up while still explaining why he thought it was okay at the time.

[@michewi]

I'd love a video editor to take this video and put every response with the because but since I'm not a video editor, I can't show this easily

[@jakechartrand7308]

Bullshit. He’s the ONLY one taking any kind of responsibility. He was destroyed. He is the definition of the better person.

[@elg6651]

The fact you have a crisis counselor on set tells me all I need to know. Thank you SWOOP! I wish more people would treat sensitive topics with such elegance and grace.

[@frosty_teacup]

So professional! I'm very impressed by the production quality!

[@Samuel-ku1qb]

She truly took the situation as seriously as was needed and that's very admirable. Though, I voiced this before but I just wish she wouldn't have been so dismissive when he answered questions about the bad things he'd done. Like the reaction to his answer about the racist question put my own ptsd in fight or flight mode. If she could at least pretend better in future interviews and maybe talk about it after she may become one of the best youtube-interviewers to date.

[@Stormstorm1]

Yes! I thought that was extremely considerate and professional.

[@lfrands]

At the end he says that she “handled him with a care he hadn’t experienced in years” ❤

[@Stormstorm1]

@ville__ "I'm better than Swoop" Signed, A legend in my own mind.

[@tallicagirl]

'Its not like that. He has a girlfriend.' Instead of 'We're married. I'm not cheating on you.'

[@JoshuaDTV]

Yep

[@tallicagirl]

Thanks for opening up. I've checked 99% of the 'wish I didnt have to go through that' boxes life has thrown at me that you talked about. Therapy and sobriety are pretty rad. Someday I'll find a supportive partner like you've found in Pamela. Have a great 24 ⏰

[@Broeckchen]

Saying nothing will happen because the other person is taken rather than because the speaker doesn't wish to cheat or doesn't want them is always such a huge red flag.

[@weirdo5424]

@@Broeckchen Exactly! Who cares what the other person does? Maybe Eric might cheat? This is supposed to be about Josh!

[@emmicah7720]

For everyone reading this who's watching the video, please keep in mind there's no such thing as a perfect victim. He can do bad things and still be a victim. Sending love to all of Colleen's victims. Edit: my comment is directed at Josh primarily. Children, including Adam, never have responsibility in what happened to them, which is why they are considered the "perfect victims." Already on Twitter (X), there are comments of people asking "Why didn't Josh leave if he was so afraid of Colleen? Why did he marry her? He must've been ok with what she was doing since he stayed." Fear is a very powerful motivator, and I don't think some people understand this. It is fear like this that kept me trapped in a marriage for 11 years, that kept me from (still to this day) outing my groomer, that kept Adam from coming out sooner, that kept the other victims from speaking up sonner, and fear that keeps countless other victims trapped in abusive situations RIGHT NOW. Because victims don't act or do things in the manner that some of the general public thinks they should, those people will then use that justification to undermine victim's stories and credibility, which is wrong. This is why I said my comment to begin with. Just because Josh didn't react perfectly, doesn't mean he isn't a victim. May everyone who's dealing with abuse or grooming in their own lives find a way to get to safety, and find some semblance of healing, however it looks to them. My comments and DM's are always open if any of you need to talk ❤❤

[@JNMKlover]

I would venture to guess that the reason victims engage in some bad things, is because too much has been heaped on them is spilling out

[@NooralainMirza]

I agree , when Johnny first came out with his story I believed him and I was going hard on josh , but I’m really glad swoop has opened up the truth for us 🤍

[@alinaserizwimasekophiri1708]

I think there is a perfect victim in some respects

[@MandyR0116]

Absolutely, other than children this is so true and is used in therapy. No human is perfect and victims deserve to be seen as a whole being and not just the good or bad.

[@J97736]

Of course he is a victim. He’s not perfect, but he’s a good guy. He is a victim.

[@chocolateb0nes403]

So many times we completely ignore men when they are abused. You did such an amazing job interviewing him and being respectful to everyone impacted. This sort of thing is so important and I'm very glad to see everyone seeing Colleen as the abuser she is.

[@FukaiKokoro]

I think this whole thing with Adam and Josh is shifting culture and I'm very glad. This story opens up a way to talk and discuss it. If anything positive comes from this it's that we take ALL victims seriously.

[@LatIenws]

👏👏👏 a little louder for the people on the back I can tell an abused victim when I see the interaction in relationships , I seriously think his case went so unoticed and was so unfair. Our male victims need our attention too.

[@thisiscait]

Thankfully it's getting far less common where we ignore abused men. At least here in Australia.

[@memethingz6004]

Moids don’t care about female victims so I won’t care about them either

[@animec-dramaskpop6362]

I think what's most important is that this shows the toxicity of fandom and how attacking ppl shouldn't be viewed as a show of support from fans or the general public.

[@theperksofbeing_rachel]

SWOOP is hands down one of the best interviewers I’ve ever seen. The fact that she made sure a certified crisis councillor was ON SET while she interviewed Joshua is absolutely amazing. As a trauma victim, I thank you for taking our feelings and experiences seriously and for showing so much kindness

[@anaalicia5029]

Yeah, that’s a rare kind of professionalism on KZbin

[@madisonrose1576]

🥺🥺🥺

[@JNMKlover]

I feel like many of the Josh and Colleen fans from that era, need a therapist. When someone is influential in ur daily life, u become part of their circle. The breakup was likely truly upsetting to fans. Seeing people in pain, hurts me. When celebrities die, I feel pain for their families. And for the people who cared for them, and how the death will affect them. Joshua has a private life now. he didn't have to lay this out there, but he also did. Because if there r Stans and maybe even his ex wife herself that start to put things on him, he should explicitly share whatever he saw and was involved in. I believe every word he is saying. We expect nothing less from Swoop, but the fact that she does comfort, and stands up to evils, and champions those who need her.

[@thesingerintheshower]

UH-MAZING!!!!!!

[@ZionDoesMakeup]

Frrrrr like she should be an guidance counselor or an counselor in general cause I'd go to her cause ik I would be heard and listened to

[@sunnysideup1218]

The way he took accountability for his racist video was by and far the best response to allegations of racism I've ever seen. I really appreciate the work he has done to better himself.

[@beautyandbrainz]

He didn't even have to apologize for it because it wasn't racist. It was a parody on how rap music and music videos were at the time. People were able to enjoy parodies like this back then, but now people are so quick to get offended and call people racist.

[@sunnysideup1218]

@beautyandbrainz or. Perhaps we always felt this way and you just weren't privy to those conversations. I promise many of us have been clocking that shit and having conversations about it for a long time.

[@inyourwifi]

​​@@beautyandbrainz Uuuuh. Unless that's not you in your profile picture, you appear to be white. Us saltine sisters don't get to decide what is racist. Swoop is a black woman telling Josh that that video is racist. Full stop.

[@JakeKoenig]

What racist video? That video wasn't even close to being racist. Black fragility is really getting out of hand.

[@The-Triumphant-Truth-Talker]

@@beautyandbrainz "BaCk iN MY dAy blurgblurgblurg"

[@morganmann5366]

I understand Josh did some messed up things but how Colleen treated him was AWFUL, I’m horrified.

[@J97736]

He was not as nearly as bad as Colleen or her ‘minion’ fans at the time. He didn’t deserve any of the treatment he got.

[@morganmann5366]

@@J97736 I agree, she removed his agency, the fear in his eyes is so telling of what he has seen, heard and experienced.

[@OpalLeigh]

She really weaponized her power advantage from being famous 🙄 poor guy never had a chance. And she did it on purpose.

[@krivasn]

Forgive my ignorance, but what did he do?

[@Sammy84_]

What he did is called surviving and that comes along with flaws, not inhumane mistakes. It is mind-baffling how he has been treated. What a chest game she plays 🤮

[@chazzo3759]

The tears that started pouring down my face when Swoop said “it’s not your responsibility to feel like you’re adding something to someone else’s plate when you’re telling your story” not sure which trauma was unlocked tonight but damn, Swoop is a WIZARD.

[@purplebanana9]

when she said that i literally worded it with her. idk how i knew what she was gonna say it just felt good 😭😭

[@NiallSkye]

I very much needed to hear it today too.

[@rebelks88]

I also love that she verbalized they had a crisis councilor on site for this. He is being so vulnerable that the precautions are so important ❤❤

[@bellapaton7512]

I know :(

[@chazzo3759]

@@rebelks88 loved this too!!! I worked as a crisis counselor for the national suicide hotline and this make my heart so BIG ❤️

[@michellebaker6302]

I don't think I've ever watched someone "take accountability" and come away as convinced that they mean it as I do with Josh. It seems like he's really done the work. I'm glad you platformed him.

[@highdefinition90s]

Right? It’s almost shocking not because of the information but because it’s so genuine, his face matches his words if that makes sense? His speech is natural and he doesn’t excuse himself when he’s wrong but doesn’t excuse others for being wrong. My sense is that he’s trustworthy and I’m glad she left him, because he deserves love and she couldn’t do that.

[@-eight-]

Near brought me to tears more than a few times. That is what real accountability looks like. So proud of him for even being brave enough to set foot on the stage after everything he went through, but to handle it all with such compassion and humility and honesty is mind blowing. He’s clearly done the work and I hope this goes a long way towards securing the peace in his life that he’s worked so hard to carve out. Also, it broke my heart how earnestly he thanked you for being the only one to even listen and be fair to him in any way publicly. Because you WERE fair and impartial, and you took him to task for the things he did wrong. So many people would take that wrong, thinking that if you’re not all for them then you’re against them. I think there is more than one person involved in this very case that would think that way. But he was just so relieved that you listened to him without completely demonizing him. That said a lot to me. It also said a lot that taking accountability for his own wrongdoings was easier for him than speaking the truth of his experiences. It speaks both to his character and the ongoing trauma that he’s experienced. My heart goes out to him and I wish him well.

[@dirtduct]

One of the true heroes in all of this is Josh's wife Pamela who helped him pick up the pieces of his shattered life and help him out of the hole he was in. As a man who also was fortunate to find a woman who did the same for me after my first marriage. I can say without reservation how important it is to find someone who will support you through thick and thin.

[@CreativeCreatorCreates]

My ex is a narcissist. My current helped me heal from him and it was no easy feat. He took on my three kids as well. There truly are angels that walk the earth. Blessings ✨

[@saixenophase]

Massive credit to Josh as well for allowing himself happiness, allowing others to help him and help himself. Such amazing team effort on their part for growing as people and living such a peaceful life before Johnny dragged his name through the mud. Edit: to the original commentor and others who went through a similar thing, you also deserve so much credit for your growth and stability now :> 🫶🫶

[@Mo-fx2lo]

Yes this, I kinda got goosebumps when she said she spoke with her because as noted she rarely gets properly respected or acknowledged despite also being affected, it was lovely to see her perspective and support of her partner through it all platformed in such a positive way 🥹

[@CrystalCat24]

Yes! She seems like a wholesome and amazing human. ❤❤

[@UP-ww9si]

This is possibly an unpopular take but I’m so fucking happy Josh said he doesn’t forgive Colleen. I’ve always felt that way about forgiveness and when people say “you owe it to yourself to forgive them” or “forgiveness brings closure.” You do not owe people forgiveness and not everyone deserves it. I fully believe you can be happy and move forward in your life while still carrying standards for yourself and sticking to what you believe is right. I have an ex from almost a decade ago who means nothing to me anymore, I’m very removed from that chapter of my life, but I still to this day don’t forgive how she treated me. And I feel confident moving forward while carrying that choice.

[@_SunscreenQueen_]

YES! You don’t owe forgiveness to anyone. I refuse to forgive my abusive ex. I don’t constantly carry anger with him he just simply doesn’t exist in my brain

[@joakuz]

THANK YOU!

[@Gingermermaid90]

Yes, this !

[@frogonwall]

Yes!! Thank you! I feel this way too. I've never felt like not forgiving someone was holding me back

[@meag_ken822]

Yesss ❤

[@zoedujour]

Holy poo. I respect Josh so much after this. THIS is an apology. THIS is accountability. No wonder they didn't work out. He acually has compassion and a soul. Go live your life, man. I wish you, your amazingly graceful wife Pamela and your tiny dog the best.

[@madisonkay_yay]

Yessss 🤍🕊️

[@Jujudeze22]

Riiiight? This was the read I had in him when first took accountability last summer.

[@shelleyconnolly8452]

So eloquently put ... you said everything I wanted to say I wish him a lifetime of peace

[@SuzieJaneBlues]

“Holy poo”

[@stephaniepapaleo9001]

Wow. I’m in tears. “It’s not your responsibility when…sharing your story” that hit home for all of us who were victims of any/all types of abuse. To hear the honesty from this man and then listen to how he still feels the need to almost protect her, just floods back the memories of wanting people to think my relationship is fine.Everything is fine I’m fine mode. That toxic train video was never meant to be an apology video. Swoop, you covered this not only as a journalist but as the advocate you are, your psych/social knowledge and compassion shines thru. I’m so glad Josh got the chance to share his side. Nikki did the best thing to slide over that phone so he could see the manipulation in black & white. ❤

[@caitlinpowell9010]

If someone comes into this comment section and says that Joshua David Evans is NOT a victim of domestic abuse, rethink your opinion and perspective. This man is scared of her. This man who used to love her and tolerate her, is scared of her. This is a prime example of Domestic abuse. I'm glad you added these segments to the doc, Swoop. We needed to hear it.

[@CaBobProductions]

The present fear that you can see throughout the interview has been one of the most striking things. That's raw, long lasting trauma.

[@thebjm1967]

Yes. Amen! He was/is a victim of narcissistic abuse. I am going through it right now and it’s absolute hell.

[@emilybunney6163]

@@thebjm1967wishing you all the best in your healing from that, it’s such a hard situation

[@theblackschaos]

Exactly, and his life, his LIFE AS HE SAW IT; ended. I’m so happy for him he was able to get therapy and move forward and has an amazing life he deserves now with a wonderful woman, but I get it. When you are actually LOYAL and UNCONDITIONAL, and you love someone so much, that’s your LIFE. You can tell he married her for the RIGHT reasons that marriage is. She is just a narcissist evil person. I really do hope she can change and get therapy and also im hoping she can set a good example for her kids. Makinf fun of people behind their backs etc, wow….. that’s just gross. I would pray no one makes fun of her kids or treats them the way she has treated people around her in and out of her life. Please Colleen, get therapy! And be a good human. Change! Take accountability!

[@nedradonnpickens]

It’s so sad to me that someone can be scared of their partner!! That should be your safe place!! So sorry Josh.

[@Subtitles_Addict]

It’s awful that someone who has been abused is taking accountability for his abuser. I think it’s more complex than him just participating or being complacent. When you’re abused, you don’t really see choices. Your response patterns are altered. Your sense of self has been erased. And decision making is based on the abusers wants and needs. There are so many victims in this story.

[@emmaharris8815]

Couldn’t agree more, some of the wording in this had me cringe, he clearly didn’t want to go against here wishes with her shows and I am sure everyone felt like they had to just go along with it to keep the peace. He shouldn’t have to apologise for being involved when he wasn’t the only one, he was her husband so I am sure he didn’t feel like he had a choice to say “colleen these jokes are messed up” without causing himself a great deal of issues at home when they were alone. No one truly knows how he felt in the situations he was forced to be in. It also sounds like the adults around her were walking on egg shells due to her rudeness so maybe it was just easier to go along. She is very messed up and it’s really saddening knowing the trauma she has caused to josh, and so many young impressionable children. I hope they can all heal from this.

[@emmaharris8815]

The wording of swoop, not your comments just to clarify

[@KairiMorin]

THANK YOU!

[@wowjennawow]

he claimed responsibility for his part and it honestly feels like swoop was trying to make him take accountability for all parties. those actions don’t just become normal to you - when you’ve been worn down like this, you start wondering if those actions are really as bad as you thought they were. you’re convinced your opinion isn’t worth anything so you doubt your perception of reality and do what you can to keep the peace. he’s owned up to his mistakes and worked to better himself which is all we can really ask for

[@spacepirate9275]

This is so true in my opinion.

[@LoveCommaHayley]

Having a crisis counselor on set is so incredible and considerate. I know there’s a lot more to take from this interview but that really hit me with just how amazing it is.

[@hernameispekka_Rebecca]

this!

[@PandaBearsXc]

Same!

[@princessmyparty]

I’m with you! I was like…wow…why doesn’t everyone do this? We’ve needed a Swoop in this world!

[@teresacondon]

This man is showing emotional intelligence and is a great example of someone who has taken the time and turmoil to turn his life around. Rising from the ashes is hard. Taking accountability is hard. I commend him for his honesty and wish him nothing but healing from here on out. This was the best possible ending to this chapter of his life.

[@thisisavivistanaccount7866]

honestly i was ready to side eye Josh. But seeing how brave, transparent and open he was changed my mind. He genuinely apologized. no “i’m sorry,but” “i did this but”. He owned the mistakes he’s made and did not repeat them. There were deeply uncomfortable and hard moments where he looked awful, yet he still was open. He needed to tell his story, i’m glad he got the space and platform to do so.

[@LuxLoser]

​@SusNation90 Lol what? We have literal evidence on Colleen, and she's refused to give any statements or offer countering evidence.

[@TheRoobster]

​@SusNation90I don't think Colleen's receipts add up... just sayin'.

[@clown2672]

​@SusNation90 not only is there evidence she HERSELF has admitted to some of the allegations. This is not a situation where there is no evidence. There is a lot of it and there is a lot of victims.

[@Jaylah234]

@SusNation90 be serious, there is literal evidence. also colleen admitted to some of the allegations. idk why you and that other troll here are trying to invalidate adam and the victims but screw y'all.

[@serenitea2435]

@SusNation90 Oop. Look y'all we have a blind Colleen stan on the comments section!

[@AmandaMuse]

The part when Josh explains becoming desensitized - he nails it. When you only have "yes" people in your life, your vision gets distorted. This is a very interesting interview.

[@MinaXo18]

Yes, absolutely. Trauma and abuse will also have you believing that certain toxic and bad behaviors are normal. For example, a kid growing up in a physically abusive household might believe that's how all households are, and might start being violent themselves, mimicking what they saw growing up, until they learn that's not normal.

[@TJMalana]

You end up having tunnel vision and that’s a very hard thing to overcome.

[@jayjayjohnson777]

same trap elon musk is in right now. He has been surrounded by yes men for so long he just does whatever

[@bernienelson8926]

Also, when going along with certain things is the only way to stay with the people you love, it can be very difficult to go against the tide. It does start slow, with you conceding small battles that don't really seem to matter too much, until you're fully conditioned to just go with whatever the leader of the group is pushing, and you honestly don't even check in with your own morals anymore because they'd interfere with you being loved and accepted.

[@MinaXo18]

@bernienelson8926 Yes! Very, very good comment! Sometimes, we go to great lengths and become people we never would have imagined we'd become just to stay with the person/people we love.

[@megs3019]

Josh is 100% a victim. It was normalized to him by colleen. Not making it okay but he doesn’t deserve this hate or the word groomer what so ever. He was and is a victim and I’m so beyond happy that he got his voice and was able to tell his story. Colleen is disgusting and karma is beautiful

[@animec-dramaskpop6362]

It was normal in general back then bc nobody was having these conversations then and plus regular ppl becoming influencers and gaining fans was new ground for all influencers. Of course there's the obvious things that you just don't say or do around young fans regardless but ppl weren't talking about parasocial relationships back then the way they are now.

[@NaturalMonroe]

The only people in this situation that are 100% victims are the children.

[@KnickKnackz]

​@@NaturalMonroeJosh is a victim too, not the same kind as the kids. But he is.

[@MakKSharpe]

​@@NaturalMonroeI think putting percentages on "victim" hood is problematic because it's like saying someone is less valid. Victims are victims, period. Doesn't mean that people are perfect, even victims, but it does show people are still victims.

[@megs3019]

@@NaturalMonroeage doesn’t matter if your a victim or not.

[@leafyveins4985]

Swoop, I was so impressed by how you handled this interview. You treated Josh with such grace and respect, including having a trauma counseler on set. I hope the best for all the kids involved in this, and Josh, and Pamela, too.

[@askadena10]

Swoop takes abuse very seriously. That was obvious to me from the first five mins of watching a video from her.

[@hypatiakovalevskayasklodow9195]

1:15:40 Hearing Josh that he was so happy about having “new vows just for them that no one else could hear or see” just tells me how much he craved at least some privacy I can’t imagine having a wedding for the whole world to see online. It doesn’t feel intimidate at all, it feels like a show

[@Hi-vr3kd]

to be fair he vlogged down the wedding aisle and posted his own daily vlogs. i think he liked the online presence at the time but the real issue is her treating him terribly off camera so he was happy that she seemed genuine during that private moment

[@snake.puppet]

​@@Hi-vr3kdshe made him vlog down the ailse

[@anja6548]

I think I remember this. I think it's really trashy to post your wedding like that.

[@hypatiakovalevskayasklodow9195]

@@Hi-vr3kd "to be fair" where was I unfair? Any way, I said it shows he craved at least some privacy. And that's a sad existence. If he was completely happy with the way things were on the filmed wedding, why would he be so excited about this other opportunity? We make the choices that seem the best at the moment, we compromise, we adapt. Doesn't mean it's actually god for us in the end, it's still sad, the lack of privacy, when you look at it from the outside. Everyone who has the compulsiveness to post everything online and publicly - to me a sad situation looking from outside even though they might feel like they're happy with that choice. Seeking that kind of validation is never a healthy thing. Even if the emotion at the moment is joy, it's an empty kind of joy, an addiction, always looking for more. It's just sad

[@hypatiakovalevskayasklodow9195]

@@anja6548 Trashy is a pretty elitist term, but any way I am sure it was good for the views. At least they were adults, and, maybe coerced into it, but still have some semblance of consent

[@thecharmingcharmander]

It’s so clear how traumatized he is. It’s sad that he over apologizes for things and even still tries to protect Colleen to an extent bc of the fear instilled in him. No, He isn’t innocent and he takes accountability and RESPONSIBILITY for his actions in the most appropriate way. I’m glad he finally has a place to be seen and heard.

[@justbecca87]

he’s so traumatized. he’s cowering back like a hurt dog at some points. poor guy.

[@ElizaBetsy_]

You can also see it in how tuned in he is to Swoop's emotions, like when he noticed she was dubious of his explaining the music video really quickly. Victims of abuse are constantly tuned in to the people around them. This is what creates the hyper-vigilant response in PTSD or CPTSD. It's so opposite from Johnny who didn't seem to notice how Swoop was responding at all when he talked insensitively about Trisha or about Josh's abuse.

[@notkennedy5787]

@@ElizaBetsy_this is such an important point!!

[@justbecca87]

yeah johnny is a fraud in all ways. joshua is a hurt person. so different. @@ElizaBetsy_

[@humanoide7076]

A narc like her leaves a permanent marc and it takes years to heal, I was with a narc and you are never the same person anymore

[@ashleylafonte3075]

What I genuinely love about this is that this is a man who has clearly been through so much and took it upon HIMSELF to go and seek help, therapy, learn, take time away, grow and he is such a soft spoken and kind man who still just wants to be as kind as possible to those who hurt him. I would love to have a man like Joshua, he deserves the best.

[@dianecastaneda4457]

s

[@Elismusic1032]

​@ville__girl what

[@margievdw]

At 1:39:04 I love and personally appreciate the acknowledgement she gave Joshua. I really resonate with his experiences of online harassment and bullying and his ways of coping. This is the first time I've watched SWOOP and the fact that she showed compassion proves this isn't like any other online gossip channel. I'm unsure of the interviewer's name but THANK YOU for being humane. You can see how much it meant to Joshua

[@jadynlynnee]

There is no such thing as a “perfect” victim. I feel so sorry for Joshua and everything he’s had to deal with.

[@jackiemoon4587]

Yes! I wish the world would remember this more

[@storm-vp6jf]

i needed to be told this ty

[@jadynlynnee]

@ville__ I hope he sues you for Slander.

[@emilyarrington320]

This is exactly why victims are afraid to speak out ALL THE TIME IRL!! because victims screw up too

[@megan807]

@ville__ You haven’t posted a damn thing and Adam was never trying to be cool?? What the hell does your comment even mean? You have spammed it over and over in every reply. Not one person cares who is cool or not? He’s not 12. But you sure act like you are. Are you one of Colleen’s kids she is grooming?

[@user-unfriendly_-o-]

As an lgbt person i absolutely would say the same regarding coming out to your family. YOUR SAFETY COMES FIRST. You don't owe anyone "the truth" and if you want you can just never tell those people who could be dangerous to you. They didn't make you feel safe or seen, they don't deserve to know everything about you.

[@nuffyj8614]

That was one of the moments of the interview that made me uncomfortable. Swoop kept trying to dig in with 'Johnny did seem genuinely hurt by how you reacted,' as if this was an accountability moment when Johnny has proven multiple times that he won't take an apology; he'll just use it as ammo to say, 'Look he admitted he did something terrible to me. I'm the victim and he's a monster!' Maybe Johnny did take it badly, but he's not looking to heal. Nothing helpful would have come from Josh apologizing...again. "Wait to tell them until you feel safe" is not bad advice from an outsider.

[@user-unfriendly_-o-]

@@nuffyj8614 i think if Swoop feels that it isn't her place to judge we should let her just show us Josh's statement and see how people react. Coming out is a sensitive issue and I think that it's normal to not wanna speak on what is okay or not as a response. Besides, when that interview was filmed, Swoop didn't know how deep the lies went and I'm kinda glad that we have Josh on record explaining that situation and his intentions so we can discuss it with full context.

[@nuffyj8614]

@@user-unfriendly_-o- I do think the topic needed to be addressed - we needed both sides of the story. But, to me at least, the way it was edited did feel like there was a bit of judgement toward his answer. We didn’t need the ‘I’m just gonna let your answer speak for itself.’ It would have anyway; including that was just a way to comment while saying no comment.

[@ArDeeMee]

Josh‘s answer was so extremely important here. Especially on YT (probably other socials as well, but I‘m not on them), there is this notion that you HAVE to come out, or else you’re just pretending. Sooo many comments from teens who got kicked out by their ALREADY abusive parents. I mean, wtf did you expect happen? Only ever come out to people you can trust. If you’re not sure, then don’t. Preserve your physical integrity. That’s the very least you deserve… ❤️‍🩹

[@snowytits]

@@nuffyj8614 yea as a gay person I feel like what's more harmful is johnny weaponizing his coming out to attack someone. It wouldve been irresponsible for Joshua to tell a teen to do something that could possibly put them in danger and/or leave them homeless. Which is a thing thats happened to teens who come out. Joshua did the right thing based on what Johnny told him

[@hannamcswain]

I give grace to Josh for being so transparent. When you’re wrapped up in an abusive relationship, you find yourself doing morally grey things as the relationship gets more intense. I don’t think his behavior was ok, but this interview was extremely indicative of healthy maturing and growing from past mistakes.

[@ABCDyeahyeahyeah]

100%. And if you don’t get out, after a certain point you will lose any chance for forgiveness because you will have gone too far.

[@ShesNervous]

Thank you yes.

[@cottage-core_]

+

[@FukaiKokoro]

It's very refreshing. When people want creators to take "accountability" this is what they want. Actions speak louder than words. Words are valueless unless there's action behind them. He's definitely put in alot of heard work mentally and emotionally growing and working on himself.

[@carolinehottz3]

Mad respect for Swoop and the team for working their butts off to ACTUALLY portray the truth. Mad respect for Josh for not defending his wrongdoings but instead acknowledging it and taking REAL accountability AND changing his behavior. It’s so rare to find and it’s truly beautiful to see someone who went from rock bottom to living his truest life.

[@Nerdosaurous]

The fact that Josh is literally the ONLY person to have spoken up and apologized at all, already says a lot about him. The fact that he is willing to publicly admit to his past wrongs and where he was complicit is frankly unheard of coming from influencers, former or current. Like, this has to be the only GOOD apology video to exist and it's not even intended to be an apology video. But honestly, all the props to Swoop and her team for putting together the research, this interview, all four videos, and of course to Swoop herself for not shying away from the uncomfortable and hard questions. This was fantastic and genuinely this entire series is just a master class in interviewing and journalism imo

[@craigharmon9494]

Anyone can say the words "I'm sorry". Big deal. Just words. So if they say "Sorry", we forgive them? Aren't we supposed to do that,,anyway,, according to the bible? Or are we judges now?

[@starspangledhiker]

@@craigharmon9494 I don't use a fiction novel to base my life decisions. I have real Morals to stand on

[@MissCaraMint]

@craigharmon9494 To quote Elton John and Bernie Taupin: Sorry seems to be the hardest word.

[@Heatherzrule]

This redemption moment for Josh is long overdue. He's a good person who made mistakes but has shown integrity and growth and is an amazing example of how you can take ownership of your missteps and do better. Bravo Josh I am so happy you finally got to break free of Colleen's twisted world and tell your truth.

[@aleciahansen7859]

I wish I could be a fly on the wall when she watches this!

[@emilygenre3627]

I did not expect to cry

[@kellywolstenholme8134]

@ville__shush

[@KnickKnackz]

​@ville__shut up troll

[@twocathome399]

@ville__ ok johnny 2.0 over here trying to gain followers off someone else’s story 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@pietrofattorello]

ITS HAPPENING EVERYONE STAY CALM

[@anneliesdecleyn]

WHATS THE PROCEDURE

[@M0-nique]

I can't lol

[@rebekahjacintags3285]

@@anneliesdecleynSTAY F****ING CALM

[@angel_swty]

Been patiently waiting for part 4!! Woot woot, thanks Swoop

[@pageypie]

@@anneliesdecleynbreathe in, breathe out. Have a snack and a drink, take breaks as needed! I know I will be.

[@acidpoptartxx]

Can we just talk about how kind and reassuring swoop is? I have never seen an interviewer be so compassionate and poised. The way she carries herself is just beautiful.

[@uzamakiforlife5554]

It seemed like she was scowling at him most of the time

[@aidan-mrtl]

​@@uzamakiforlife5554 that's just her resting face 💀 and she generally has to remain impartial and professional to some extent

[@uzamakiforlife5554]

@@aidan-mrtl nah I’ve watched several videos. there’s a difference between rbf and scowling

[@inkassosjefen6315]

​@@uzamakiforlife5554i agree. She doesnt usually look at abuse victims like you would look at the leader of a murder cult, like she does to him.

[@emnstuff]

Tbh am I the only one who finds it absolutely acceptible for Josh to say "that's none of my business" when he came out to him? That is a very personal thing to tell someone, and Josh distanced himself from something that could have been taken as a manipulative tactic if he drew closer to him through that. Adult or no, he knew him as a kid so it probably felt very inappropriate to hear. That's not a response I would expect from a man attempting to groom someone.

[@Prokomeni]

You’re totally right. And anyway, it’s not exactly a crime to not have the perfect response or reaction to such a thing. Insensitive or rude at best as long as they’re not obviously being discriminatory or aggressive.

[@samanthaM7119]

Totally and the setting of the interaction also plays apart, Josh didn’t have the time to talk to him about it and it really isn’t any of his business. If John wanted advice, he should’ve asked it over text or when Josh actually had the time, but I think it goes back to the theory that John had/has a crush on Josh.

[@CleverestWitch2188]

Let's be clear though. Johnny was a full ass grown ass adult when he came out to Josh. 18 going on 19. So.

[@kylecamardella627]

I def think it could have been said more sensitively but he was raised Christian in Macon, not only could it have been a reaction of “I don’t want to know who you are sexually interested in” but a knee jerk reaction where in the church and in conservative rural areas there are things like that that you just aren’t supposed to talk about

[@the_petty_crocker]

@@kylecamardella627 It should be said more sensitively when someone you barely know comes out to your on your lunch break in the middle of your workplace where you're completely surrounded by people? Johnny knew better, but he put Josh on the spot to get a reaction - then whined and held a grudge when he didn't get the one he wanted.

[@Cal-c-u-later]

I'm 2 hours in and I just want to say that Josh really seems to be explaining things without trying to excuse what he did. It's refreshing to see somebody in this whole debacle being accountable.

[@ditzycup8140]

And the way shows how easy it is to do if someone actually wants to and is willing to put in the effort, somehow makes Colleen’s ukulele non-apology look even woree

[@kellibella0804]

​@@ditzycup8140... just when we thought that wasn't possible!! I fully agree.

[@ryguy56]

right?? we kinda set our expectations so low for influencers apologizing, this should be the standard honestly

[@turnoffthetv]

I agree. I see someone who's saying, "This was my thought process then, but looking back, wow, I was NOT right, this is not okay." And that's all I would ask for. I do believe re the problematic content and the nornalizing that this was part of Colleen's control eg the "get over the cheating in 24 hours or I go". By the time it reached content creation, he'd learned not to talk back "or else". I understand his explanation that when you're out, you can clearly see the situation and go, "WTF did I do? Why didn't I fight back?"

[@TziporaRaphaella]

I’m really impressed by him. I’m both a recovering addict and someone recovering from narcissistic abuse and I’m more in the very early stages he spoke of about not caring if I died and my addiction took me but finally getting back up to own my issues even if I can’t change the harm that happened to me- it’s inspiring. I screen recorded a few minutes of what he said around the start of when Swoop was confronting him with the accusations against him and I shared it and want to sit with it because I can only hope to reach the kind of place he’s at. I don’t think enough people do the work. Because it’s true that hurt people hurt people. Before I was ready to face mine I was clinging hard to my abuser (many of us addicts are also addicted to love, or the idea of love as Josh so accurately put it) and excusing their behavior because I knew they had been hurt and abused too. And that’s the thing. That’s how all this awfulness so often perpetuates. No one wants to do the work so the hurt people just continue hurting people on and on. It’s a rare thing and an effing hard thing to actually do the work and heal and change. To not only heal from your own abuse but to own the mistakes you’ve made too. It’s a process I’m only beginning and like Josh, at some point I didn’t have a choice. I think a lot of us who do have hope for true redemption or at least real change tend to naturally be more sensitive types and it takes that kind of rock bottom, life or death level of pain to turn it around.

[@maryamsheikh7597]

Taking accountability can be seriously F***ing hard sometimes. Huge round of applause to Josh for actually stepping up and doing the hard work. Talking about conversations like this can be so hard and triggering and he spoke about it with such grace even after EVERYTHING. This is truly what growth looks like on a human being and I wish nothing but happiness and prosperity to Josh and his wife in the future ❤

[@natarshagunter]

not just that - he proved that it's possible to take accountability as a high profile person AND that taking responsibility for your actions is well received by the public. Colleen and Kory should be taking notes right now

[@EmiFromMars]

Agreed, he took genuine accountability for his part. He was manipulated used and replaced... huge props to him for doing this interview

[@DyslecticAttack]

Definitely. I had a handful of moments where I'm like "the way you word that doesn't seem like you've completely grown out of that or taken full accountability for how bad it is", but he did better than I probably would with my own mistakes. He seems very intent on being better, but also doesn't shy away from not knowing all. He acknowledges not only his past shortcomings, but also his current ones. He also primarily seems to want people (including himself) to be able to heal, and to that purpose wants to be very accommodating and reassuring in what happened, including his part in that. So yeah, he at the very least earned my respect in how he is dealing with this, even if it isn't perfect, it does seem sincere.

[@citlalyhernandez5408]

O

[@HonorWillow]

@@us_embussy3785 he's apologised constantly and he did talk about people's he's victimised

[@loraleiffxi]

Please give Adam a virtual hug. He lost his cat today, only months after losing his other one. He's really gutted right now and in a lot of pain. :(

[@chibi_rabbit]

I really couldn't care about his social impact on the internet. However, the loss of a furry companion is brutal, and I hope his heart heals. Rip to his cat. :/

[@gabby3011]

Silencing someone the way Colleen silenced Josh is absolutely disgusting. Thank you Swoop for giving him the chance to share his story and not allow Colleen (or Johnny) to silence him any longer.

[@teethfordice]

or other youtubers/podcasters refusing to interview him for that matter.

[@mentalbrookedown.]

His honesty is so refreshing. He knows he messed up but OWNED it. Try it, Colleen. We know you’re watching.

[@skyln3496]

I don’t think she is capable of that level of self awareness tbh she way to narcissistic

[@Cat-tastrophee]

The accusations would bury her. I think she could have owned up and dug her way out in the beginning, but she's shown her even worse sides in the process and shot herself in both feet.

[@morganwaas4868]

It's actually so refreshing to hear someone admit "I went along with it because it would benefit me." So many celebrities and influencers try to hide behind excuses when I think we all know that this is the answer all along. It's always "I didn't know it was wrong" or "it was a different time" or any other string of bullshit. I appreciate Josh's willingness to say he knew it was wrong but he did it anyway for his own benefit. I also appreciate the willingness to return for the second zoom interview after Swoop really held his feet to the fire in the first one.

[@ellyetibbets3321]

My favorite comment so far

[@OpalLeigh]

It’s authenticity for sure:) haven’t we all done something selfish and then had it blow up in our faces? It’s very human.

[@thereturnofveronicasawyer9998]

Did what?

[@amyrose2760]

This was.... flawless. The amount of accountability. I have so much bloody respect for this man. I don't care what anyone says. He's human. Just a human trying to do better. Thankyou Josh.

[@haileyshutze2587]

I feel so terribly for this man. He has such a pain in his eyes. You can really see how much of a toll Colleen took on his mental health.

[@nataleo9093]

he seems very genuine in his pain and remorse, I think

[@julia-vq1ow]

@ville__colleen we know it’s you🙄

[@dandelion_official4812]

@@julia-vq1ow spamming comments again 😑 it's probably Kory 🤣

[@minerlady140]

@@julia-vq1owjust report them. They are a bot.

[@Rowanda7361]

He looks fine.

[@CoffeeWithKayli]

I’m an old millennial and I watched this all go down first hand back in 2016. The hate Josh received after the divorce was some of the cruelest I’ve ever seen. It was awful. People were attacking him so hardcore no matter what he did or said. I’m so glad he’s finally getting to speak his truth and get the validation and justice he deserves!

[@adriaticirisjames]

As a recovering alcoholic and survivor of suicidal ideation and abuse myself, i have to say that watching Josh handle this interview with such grace, such honesty (flaws, bad past behavior and all) and such compassion for self and others was genuinely helpful to me in my recovery. Thank you, Swoop, for platforming someone who seems to be genuinely trying to be a healthier person and apologize for the hurt and damage he’s caused with past actions (such as the racist videos). He came off as a person who is willing to change for the better, to listen to others and to grow, and i have to say I’ve been in a dark place lately and watching this interview i felt that Josh was a role model to me in my own recovery from alcoholism and everything else. Thank you Josh, thank you Swoop and Team Swoop.

[@zsazsamorte]

That’s beautiful. Wishing you the best in your recovery. ❤

[@tallicagirl]

word. have a great 24 🕦

[@Jettypilelegs]

19 years here, it gets better and better!

[@Anna-ik6qz]

I hope you find all the inspiration to continue your sobriety and healing journey. You got this, always remember that ❤

[@adriaticirisjames]

Thanks y’all 🥺

[@orpheuseleven3047]

So, I missed part 3, so my jaw hit the floor when Johnny fully just victim blamed Joshua for being trapped in an abusive relationship for years. "He had every opportunity to leave." Okay, go walk up to other survivors of domestic abuse and say that.

[@pinkminipuff]

Johnny has definitely shown himself. I don't want people to go at him, but he is rather creepy to me. He has the clout-chaser disease and seems like he had a unrequited crush on Josh. Definitely stalker activities were performed by Johnny. After listening to all these interviews, that is my opinion on Johnny Silverstri. Swoop and her team have definitely earned my views. These are professional, raw, and unbiased docs.

[@pinkminipuff]

So yeah, the victim blaming sent me reeling. I've heard it so many times before from people who have never experienced being a victim of abuse.

[@ladyhella7560]

​@@pinkminipuffwhat bothers me more is that I was not noticing how fucked up we're the things he was saying until Swoop pointed it. It really freaked me out

[@AskMia411]

The truly wild thing about that is that he already did. Swoop IS a survivor of domestic abuse, which Johnny KNEW, and he still said it TO HER FACE. How Swoop managed to keep a straight face and stay professional after that is a miracle. Watching the interview, the change in her body language is subtle, but you can see the bottled up fury and it's cathartic when she gets to fully nail him for his disrespectful BS.

[@comagirl0815]

​@@pinkminipuff I have too, but never seen it said with a wolf grin before. That was downright chilling.

[@River13Sky]

Thank you for taking the time to actually investigate and listen to the victims one-on-one. In an age of unverified, unsupported, mass-sharing clickbait titles, your content is such a breath of fresh air.

[@uzomannorom1409]

we love swoop 🫶🏾

[@alainathompson6147]

this 1000%

[@Sara-xk1ns]

I’ve got to add a small addition for being such a kind soul and allowing the victims to feel safe and comfortable enough with Swoop so that they could open up and tell their story. I don’t think he would’ve done this with just anyone. Her efforts to deliver facts while remaining compassionate yet stern to those who deserve it don’t go unnoticed.

[@madtingz2288]

She’s never done that with Colleen tho she’s never got her side

[@loannadominique]

If you watch the video, you'll know that Swoop mentioned multiple times that Colleen refused to make comments. There is so much proven evidence against her, why would anyone choose to believe her? @@madtingz2288

[@agirlwithapurpose9529]

The absolute AUDACITY to say “he f****** around and found out” when talking about someone staying in an abusive relationship, JUST because the man was the victim?! You could NEVER say something like that to an abused wife. Johnny is insane.

[@demetriagdss98]

Not trying to downplay it but we do say that about women. WDYM? We say they should have chosen better men, that they should have seen it coming, that it's the woman respinsability to pick a good man, that women pick the "bad guy" over the "good guy" and then they "complain". We as a society say all of these stuff.

[@anxietysalsa7643]

Looking for this comment cuz I couldn’t have rolled my eyes harder! Omg 😤 he’s a child still

[@agirlwithapurpose9529]

@@demetriagdss98 i know some people do, but it is heavily frowned upon to say all of those things, because most people see that IT IS NOT THE VICTIM’S FAULT! And even the way it is said is so different. The difference between “she chose wrong” to what johnny said is insane!

[@veronarmmichaelis7264]

​@@demetriagdss98that does not justify it. Many people does horrible things, says stupid things but that doesnt mean its right thing to do. Idk why would you even point that out. Its always bad to blame the victim no matter if its a woman or man.

[@orsikocs]

Johnny really really rubs me the wrong way. Josh put it best. Where does he get the audacity of calling ppl names and mock the abusive marriage they were in and then demand a phone call.

[@dianapacilio2729]

this dude has been to therapy and did the WORK - it's so evident in the way he speaks and is able to admit and discuss these topics. I hope everyone is able to move forward and find peace. What a wild story. Thank you, Swoop, for handling this with such integrity and maintaining your ethical standards throughout. Hope you get a nice break after this. Take care

[@kaseypb]

No question 💯

[@lilyflower0616]

I think this is an AMAZING show of “getting swept up in the wrong crowd”. Him coming on camera and saying, “yes, I did these things, there really is no excuse for it, I will never do it again.” Is SOOOO brave. Facing all of those allegations against him and admitting with maturity is profound. It really speaks volumes to his character and regardless of all stories, we see you for that. Amazing interview Swoop. Sending some love to you.

[@kyla2423]

JOSH, 1) thank you for taking accountability 2) sorry for all you’ve been through 3) I BELIEVE YOU. YOU ARE VALID

[@ragdoll3745]

So as someone who was raised Evangelical Christian I can 100% confirm that children were encouraged to have older mentors in my church, especial in Middle School/High School. I consistently received texts and met with a 35 year old woman who would overshare about her fertility journey and marriage. I was 12. At the time, she was my spiritual mentor and I was a "mature" "empathetic" young "leader" in the church. Now? Dude, I would NEVER talk to a 12 year old the way she spoke with me. It was just my "normal" and I remember thinking about how I looked forward to mentoring other young women once I matured and grew. Glad that's not the direction my life went. Not excusing Josh's behavior but man that stuff messes with your perception of exceptable age boundaries. edit: oh wow that's a lot of people, I didn't expect anyone to care!!! Religious Trauma, that goes far beyond the mentorship experience, is a very painful and prominent part of my life and I'm on a life long journey of healing. I'm not going to be able to read the rest of the comments for my own mental well being, but to every single one of you who carry similar grief and trauma, and commented your experiences you are so seen, and so valid! Your stories matter and deserve to be voiced, so I won't delete the comment. My greatest hope is that we can find peace. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@ThisIsMeMorgan]

So true.

[@sarahkane380]

Relate so much and can confirm this is exactly how it was in my church up bringing too. From the age of 12 or 13 on I was actively befriended by adults who mentored me, including COUPLES who way way way over shared their intimate lives with me. I thought it was normal. Now I think it’s bizarre and scary.

[@sykogurl05]

For sure! I felt close to and trusted my youth pastors there was a time when one of them told us not to hang out with one of the other kids, because they thought he was a "bad" one. And another pastor had a conversation with me about my bf alone in a room downstairs, and only now can I see that I should not have been in the situation or having that conversation with him. He should have found a way to talk to my mom if he was so concerned, but he really just wanted to talk to me about the note I wrote to my boyfriend at 13 lol that man is a stranger to me now. How weird.

[@HaidebugCreates]

Yeah fr real

[@catherinetomes4025]

I was thinking about Evangelism while watching it too! It’s so normal in that community to have women mentor girls and men mentor boys. I remember it being an “honor” to be able to get asked to be someone’s mentee.

[@prismmakeupartistry8675]

The fact that he didn't take her money is insane and speaks a lot to his character.

[@paullopez2021]

It does, and it ended up being the smartest decision he made. Because Colleen would've used the pre-nup as "evidence" of how "controlling" he is.

[@akastardust]

he should have taken half, he deserved every penny.

[@karenblanck7726]

Every time I hear from another person in this saga….I am even more taken aback by the shear ugliness of Ballinger…and that she’s got a massive trail of damaged people she’s left behind. Her narcissism is at the highest level….dangerous. She doesn’t belong anywhere or have ANY kind of platform where she can continue to manipulate young minds. And every sponsor who continues to support her with should be frankly ashamed. She does enough damage to adults and doesn’t belong anywhere where children can be influenced. The venues supporting her concert tours should take a hard look…and restrict access to anyone under the age of 18 unless a parent is with them…and even that is questionable. Frankly I’m shocked at the parents who do go to these shows and see how truly inappropriate the content is for their children. For example I would have walked out of any show with my kids if I saw her luring kids to out their hands down her pants like that.

[@meganmichelllllle]

@@akastardusthe really did cause he made her a lot of money

[@meowser1905]

@@akastardust He did, but given who he was married to and what we know about her? She would have given him hell for it, and sometimes having peace away from an abuser is worth more than gold.

[@black__phoenix]

this is honestly one of if not the most honest public apologies and acknowledgement of taking accountability like truly the most open transparent and respectful video i’ve seen coming from someone with a public platform and is truly refreshing thank you so much to SWOOP and the whole SWOOP team and thank you Josh for being so brave and i wish nothing but love and healing towards you and your family

[@thelastholdout]

As someone who for years was in a relationship with an abusive narcissist, I can say from experience that they have a knack for normalizing toxic behavior by degrees, to the point where it's difficult to stand back at any point and say "oh man, this is truly fucked up." I empathize with Josh being dragged down the rabbit hole with Colleen and letting her toxicity rub off on him. It's admirable that he's taking responsibility for his part in the shitty things he witnessed and did, and it does sound like he's genuinely trying to be a better person nowadays. That's growth you rarely see from anyone who's been in the spotlight the way he has.

[@elizaham3189]

I was with a narcissistic abuser for 16 years. I completely understand where he's coming from during this.

[@lunamonetmonroe]

@@elizaham3189Same, but for 10 years. I am so happy that he seems to be on a path of healing and forgiveness. (himself) I am not yet able to fully forgive myself, although I’m *MUCH* closer than I’ve been in the past 1.5 years that I have been apart from my ex. Perhaps one day, but I’m not quite there yet. Funny that it seems easier for me to forgive my ex than to forgive myself, but that comes from *years* of being broken down psychologically. Working on that now with my therapist. Sending positive and healing vibes to anyone who needs them right now. You *are* valid. 💜

[@Sallimyra]

100%

[@Christine-49]

I was going to comment something similar, but you said it perfectly. I was also in a similar relationship. It is not easy and you have to make excuses to get yourself through it. Thankfully, I wasn't hurting anyone else but myself.

[@lovingod4ever33]

FACTS!!!!👊

[@BeehiveBoy]

My abuser has already passed away, and yet I am still afraid of her. That phrase josh said about 'im not under her spell, but I still feel like I'm under her control' tells me all I need to know about him..he was profoundly hurt by this woman and so many strangers with such vitriol. To see he's survived and is thriving as he is with his wife is such a miracle. I hope I can get to that point some day. Sometimes I have dreams that she comes back to life and starts abusing me again. I wake up afraid. It rarely goes away completely. I'm glad josh now has support system to help him cope with that fear.

[@airypersiflage]

I am so sorry that happened to you and I hope you are in safer circumstances now. ❤

[@BeehiveBoy]

@@airypersiflage thankfully so :) I appreciate it

[@Dani-Claw]

​@ville__Shoo

[@Dani-Claw]

My heart breaks with everyone's story of abuse and the extreme fear. I am so sorry and hope you can continue to heal and grow to the point the fear starts to finally fade. Bless you ❤

[@alexishess713]

I'm sorry that you went through that and are still going through this fear. I'm wishing you the peace and healing you deserve ❤️

[@jessicavela9764]

When he said he didn’t wish pain upon her I started tearing up. This interview was a breath of fresh air. Someone who actually opens up and takes accountability.

[@ckw039]

Josh is definitely one of the rare ones who you can genuinely tell is sorry about what he did & CHANGED his life around and has taken accountability. Major respect. I hope Josh finally gets his peace & healing. Swoop, thank you & your team for showing 100% truthful & accurate research.

[@allison493]

I have to be honest I just don’t understand why him admitting to “trolling” gossip sites to see what is being said about him or just thinking about making fake accounts to try and spread the truth would make him look bad. Is it bad social media etiquette, sure I suppose but it’s human nature to want to know what is being said about you and to try and clear your name. He wasn’t on there saying bad things about Colleen. I don’t understand the criticism on this issue. Am I alone?

[@paullopez2021]

I don't get it either. At least he's a public figure though! I had an old coworker (her name was Monica, she hated me) stalk my Twitter and thought a tweet I made about Monica Lewinsky was about her.

[@CommanderWaddles]

It's because he, an influencer, was eavesdropping on young fans & this creates opportunity for predatory adults to utilize information these young fans share personally to become closer with them, a.k.a. grooming.

[@LasBlackUnicrn]

Me either. Sounds like they are trying to make this a lot more nefarious than it was. Plenty of influencers lurk on their subreddits, others ppps comment sections etc to see what others are saying or have discords that im sure they probably read and don’t always interact with. It’s very uncomfortable watching him be lowkey reprimanded and grilled over it. Obviously he had no business talking to those young kids. He’s knows that and we know that. It seems he was no where near on the level that Colleen was as with the minors. I dnt really know there history though so maybe I’m missing something

[@maddie-ni4fm]

Agreed completely. Very weird how she tried to grill him about that

[@dorahnotani4316]

Not alone

[@spookycloud]

I can’t remember the last time I sat through any piece of media that was three and a half hours long and stayed checked in through the whole thing. That’s really a testament to your skills as an interviewer, as well as how honest and vulnerable he was throughout the interview. I’m so glad he decided to come forward and just as glad that you’re the person he opened up to.

[@lilmsdrummer]

I have ADHD and I was enthralled the whole time, let me tell you.

[@bridget663]

​@@lilmsdrummersaaame. I'm not even medicated right now and was able to watch the whole thing. Such a big compliment to Swoop lol. Amazing.

[@luvsong4no1]

I honestly didn’t realize how long this was… until your comment. I was hooked!

[@kellywolstenholme8134]

@ville__shush

[@jennicalyn3542]

I second everything you said.

[@chloeeeezyMC]

I think its extremely telling that Josh turned down interviews with other media outlets. You're the exception, Swoop. Your integrity and insistence on balanced reporting, coupled with your LOUD AF advocacy for victims everywhere make him feel safe in ways he doesn't elsewise. Damn. Thats huge.

[@jackienjackien]

This shivers your comment gave me. ❤ I thought the same thing when hearing it. He chose SWOOP, because SWOOP is TRUTH

[@SaintShion]

Yes same for Adam. Swoop believes and treats people with care and respect. Shes also brave cause Colleen clearly intimidates ppl. Ive never watched Colleen, I dont know any fans. I also wasn't a big twitter person, but *even I heard that Adam was a liar, and mean on twitter.* This is how much power Colleen had within her fans. I feel so bad for believing it about Adam and im just thankful Im not a person who messages mean stuff to strangers online. Adam and Josh deserve massive apologies f4om Colleen.

[@paullopez2021]

Swoop is the only outlet that would've given Josh the platform he needed to tell his truth with the nuance he needed. CBS News would've never considered interviewing him for 60 Minutes. ABC News would've never considered him for a one-hour tell-all special with Diane Sawyer. Both CBS and ABC sure as hell wouldn't have been so gracious as to offer an on-set counselor for Josh.

[@toericabaker]

41:55 And she was on our bed.... playing the ukulele" I.. SCREAMED.

[@ladyhella7560]

I am starting to think it's the only way she knows how to "apologize"