Create Tension To Get Her Chasing You

[@SkillofAttraction]

For questions to be answered in the comments, please give a "super thanks" or head over to my website & ask there. 𝕊𝕜𝕚𝕝𝕝 𝕆𝕗 𝔸𝕥𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 Men's Advice Community: soa.fm Private relationship/dating coaching: soa.fm/dating-relationship-coaching/ Questions or feedback: soa.fm/contact/ Get Your Ex Back: 45dayreattraction.com ✔ SOA APPROVED COACHING PROGRAMS 𝗙𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘀 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗕𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗳𝗶𝘁𝘀 How To Get A Sex Buddy: bit.ly/3Mitohu 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗰𝗿𝗮𝗺𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗿 Turn a Girl Friend into a Girlfriend: bit.ly/3Kf9EJt 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗮𝗼 𝗢𝗳 𝗕𝗮𝗱𝗮𝘀𝘀 How To Attract ANY Woman: bit.ly/35Jyx0W 𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝘅 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 Get The Sex Life You Deserve: bit.ly/3K9bI5V

[@MattCassCook]

I love this. No BS. No woke agenda. Just pure guy to guy relationship advice that so many of us guys need. Thank you sir 👌🏻

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks, man! I appreciate that! Thanks for watching!

[@ddmozz]

Excelent video and completely spot on. At one point I noticed that I was a lot more successful with girls I wasn't really into, and it all came down to one thing: simply doing less. I wasn't so forthcoming with texting or with compliments, or with arranging dates. This (unbeknown to me) created tension and caused these girls to chase me. Of course if you take it too far they'll just give up and leave. And yes, it's completely possible to "fake it 'till you make it" with a girl you're actually attracted to, even if you don't have that many options.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, exactly. When you don't care as much, you don't try as hard...& if you give her just enough to believe she has a chance with you, she will fight tooth & nail to win you over.

[@inkwyvern5171]

I'm really Impressed with the frequency of videos you upload on the subject. You've helped me personally more than once before too in the comments. Just wanna say thanks

[@SkillofAttraction]

Glad to hear you're finding my content helpful!

[@Thegamehhh449]

She is telling me or giving me hints of rejection, but I’m not falling for it, her smile, her silence, her eyes looking at me, tell me otherwise oh and the tension is undeniable

[@SkillofAttraction]

I wouldn't ignore hints if rejection. The mixed signals tells me that she's confused herself. As I mentioned in your other comment. sounds like a little space is in order. Not too much space, but just be a little less available until she starts pushing for more of your time again.

[@Thegamehhh449]

@@SkillofAttraction amazing! Exactly sir thank you once again, and God bless.

[@carlosdixan112]

Your videos are awesome as always. Really good stuff Erick , I have a question for you, my brother. If you can’t trust what a woman says only her actions. How can you trust her when there’s no way to verify her actions? Also, women are very manipulative and sneaky. I’m not saying this from anger but it got me thinking. When I get into an ltr it happens all the time. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, and I don't know if Is that I don't trust women or I don’t trust myself to see the red flags and the signs before they cheat? Thanks. for helping us, you're a great mentor

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thank you for the super thanks...& the compliment! I think we all have a little damage from past relationships where we were lied to &/or cheated on. So, it's natural to be a little suspicious of any woman. What I tell myself is, "what one woman did isn't necessarily what this next woman will do". But, the only way that you verify her words or actions as being truthful is by not necessarily believing them until those words & actions align, as well as, watching for relative consistency. I mean, women are rarely consistent due to their emotions always changing, & the fact that they follow their emotions. But watching over the long term will help you to determine what's real. And if it's a new girl, I recommend that you don't go "all in" with a girl until AFTER the honeymoon period. We're wired to fall in love & bond ourselves to each other early on...this is nature's way to make sure that we have babies. But it isn't until after the honeymoon period that the real girl comes out. As you mentioned, women can be master manipulators...they have a lot of practice at that & since most men fall for it, they continue. Once a woman can confirm that she can manipulate you, she will do more of it. So, it's important that you watch for signs of manipulation & nip it in the bud, because if she discovers you can't be manipulated, she won't do it to you...or at least she will attempt it much less. One way men demonstrate that they can be manipulated is by losing control of their emotions. This is yet another reason why passing her tests are so important. There's a fantastic book on women's tests; how to spot them, how to pass them, etc. I Highly recommend it...."What Women Want When They Test Men" by Bruce Bryans. If you're in the US you can find it here: amzn.to/3Ha3nNB So, you have make sure that women's words & actions align before you believe it. If anything, go by what their actions are, because her actions are most likely the truth. As an example, a woman telling you how much she loves you, but isn't making the effort to see you, her actions are the truth. In this case, her actions are saying that you're not really much of a priority...until she needs to be emotionally fulfilled. Then she will start calling/texting you to get your attention & emotional fulfillment, but never really make the effort to see you. Most men are fooled by this, because she's reaching out & saying all the things he wants to hear. He feels he has a chance, but she will rarely make the effort to actually see him, because she gets what she wants for free. See what I mean?

[@floki5605]

You're my favorite coach, spot on 👌

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks, man! Appreciate that!

[@salibrahim6158]

Its Morning here; great vid to start the day ⭐️💫💫

[@SkillofAttraction]

Glad to hear I can kick-start your day!

[@Alenoir88]

That introduction music it's quite cool, been following your videos time ago, they helped me a lot, thank you so much for your advices.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks, man! Appreciate that! Glad to hear you're finding my videos helpful.

[@Nicey90]

Dude you nail these tips

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks, man! Glad you've found them helpful!

[@moktarmesbahi6723]

Hey Erik! You always say that we must do the man job by keeping the fun, setting up the dates and leading things to the bedroom. But what if the woman puts in no effort? Like not initiating the contact? Is there any formula you suggest like going no-contact after the third date? And how would you deal with such situation when the girl is cold, you’re doing everything, she does nothing but goes out on dates with you? Thanks.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Either she's not doing anything because you're doing everything, her interest is low, OR it's too early in the relationship for her to begin chasing you. A few video that may help... When she stops putting in the effort: kzbin.info/www/bejne/l3W6YXikrdeiarc How to pace the courtship: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmKsnayHfap5isk Will women chase you?: kzbin.info/www/bejne/raXSq4CXataUnK8 And of course this video on creating tension will help. Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.

[@Hummel5006]

Coach love the videos as always! Question- we mutually decided to part ways last week and after 4 days she contacted me and said she wants to go on a date and try to make things right. I was hesitant but I said ‘’are you sure’’ and she said ‘’yes’’ then just went off topic about work and neither of us said anything else about it. That was 4 days ago and still haven’t heard from her. I guess I didn’t say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ because I was caught off guard. What do I do? Stay in no contact like before or reach out? Super thanks!

[@SkillofAttraction]

Well, if you want to work it out then I'd contact her & set a date. She put it out there & now she expects you to take the lead. Also, I have changed things up around here because I'm spread too thin. Please see my pinned comment for future reference.

[@beasty45]

This Brother is a G

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks, my man! Much appreciated!

[@SS-ly2bn]

This would work for shallow women who are not looking for a stable, long term potential relationship. I would see this behavior as a no go. (From a woman)

[@SkillofAttraction]

You're the ONE woman in the whole world where sexual/romantic tension doesn't work, huh? You would never have a relationship with a man(or woman) without it.

[@Rumour-]

"From a woman"...enough said😂

[@pioneeratheart6496]

Good video

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks man! Glad you enjoyed it!

[@carlosdixan112]

Erick on your video ( Controlling behavior conveys insecurity ) there was something that called my attention . Although I agree with everything you said on that video , my question for you is . Why is she going to a girls night out ? To me is very clear that she’s going there for bad purposes . Get some flirt or even possibly to sleep around . I had seeing some women cheat on their men in girls night out and then they just go back to them like if nothing happens . Do you have any advice on how to know when a women is cheating or potentially about to cheat so I can avoid that pain on the future ??

[@SkillofAttraction]

Yes, GNO can be an opportunity for a woman to cheat, but it could also just be an innocent night out with her friends. As an example, my ex would have GNO about once a month just to blow off some steam. Was she cheating on me? Of course I can't say for sure, but I never suspected anything, as she'd send me photos & texts all night keeping me up to date with what they were doing. Oftentimes she'd stop by my place afterwards. She did this one her own...I never asked for her to do that. However, one thing you can say if this sort of thing makes you uncomfortable is something like, "I can't stop you from going out with your friends, but I just can't take a woman seriously who does this. You're free to do whatever you want, but I just won't be able to take you seriously". Now, just be prepared that she may go anyway & that means you have to follow through with your threat. You can't take her seriously anymore, because chances are she's going to test you to see if you;re serious.

[@carlosdixan112]

@@SkillofAttraction thanks Erick you’re the best !

[@carlosdixan112]

Thanks!

[@inkwyvern5171]

What's this? Yellow boarder and 9 99

[@carlospita6442]

@@inkwyvern5171 That’s a little donation for all the value he provided me

[@inkwyvern5171]

@@carlospita6442 cheers

[@SkillofAttraction]

@Inkwyvern - It's a "super thanks" which is basically a donation.

[@alexanderkohary1690]

Excellent, thx.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Glad you found it helpful!

[@gabynyy12]

Hey coach. The new thumbnails you have are a big improvement over the old ones keep up the great work! I have a question though. I’ve been flirting with a girl who works at a gym nearby. I asked her out and she agreed and gave me her number. After a few days passed I went to confirm where we are going and when but she said she’d let me know and she never did. Should I call her out on it? The next day I acted like everything was normal and we worked out a little bit and were flirting with each other. I’m not exactly sure what to do next? Should I try again or just let her come to me? Or should I act more cold towards her?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks for the 'super thanks' & the compliment! Sometimes women say things "I'll let you know" as a test to see if you get impatient...& sometimes it's simply low interest. In either case, it wouldn't be a good idea to call her out. What I recommend here is that you continue act as if everything is normal & you're unfazed....continue being light-hearted & upbeat with her when you see her. The idea is that you show/imply that you have plenty of options, so a girl not getting back to you has no effect on you...that's the attitude you want to have. Give it about 2 weeks since she told you that she'll let you know. If you don't hear from her by then, casually & playfully bring it up, saying something like, "Hey, are we still on?" Don't mention that you never heard from her...that shows you're paying too much attention & you want to be a little aloof at this point.

[@gabynyy12]

@@SkillofAttraction hey coach I have an update question if you don’t mind answering. After that day I didn’t see her for while but I wrote something to her on instagram today after she posted something asking about hair suggestions. I told her she should get bangs and she responded “BANGS are you trying to tell me something?” I responded “ lol am I?” And then I said “Idk what your referring to but I like the way you think”. I thought she was trying to flirt with me so I flirted back. I guess it was the wrong move because when I saw her at the gym today after while she just ignored me when I said hi. What happened there? I plan on giving her that same energy but if she try’s to talk to me should I call her out on it or just move on?

[@DPhasely]

Very nice!

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks man!

[@sevenstars4817]

She has so many options that if i make her chase she will call the next guy and i will be single forever

[@SkillofAttraction]

That's a fearful, scarcity mindset though. Plus, if a woman truly feels a strong attraction for you, she's not even thinking of other guys. And when a woman is chasing you, she has no time or energy to be chasing anyone else. Women actually WANT to chase & win you over.

[@yours_amya]

Big Brother ❤️

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks for watching!

[@haskeyhuuu7461]

Coach Erick first thanks for helping us ❤ My question is there’s a chick that we work in the same company and when ever we come face to face she smile and laughed that’s what she does every time she saw me but today was different she just came to me in the cafeteria and I was in a line in front of her and she just told me let me go in front of u or I will slap you and some others jokes words seem like she was joking So so should I start takin to her because I always ignore her

[@SkillofAttraction]

Depends on the context & her tone, but it sounds like she was testing you to see if you'd easily give in. In these cases you want to playfully tease her, but without giving in. Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.

[@bruhbruhh5103]

Yea they be testing that worthiness into loneliness 😂😂😂 🐈

[@SkillofAttraction]

They all test men. There's no escaping it. So instead of getting offended, see it as a sign that they like you, because women don't test men they're not attracted to.

[@fuzzypanda1684]

"Women want your attention". Spoken like a man who's living life on "Easy" mode. For those of us living life on "Hard" or "Nightmare" mode, we know that no matter how good of shape you get into, how attractive you get, or how confident, charismatic or aloof you become, women will STILL want nothing to do with you. It's a rare reality that affects only the small subset of men cursed to live life on difficulty modes above "Hard".

[@SkillofAttraction]

Besides what I said on your other comment, you want it too bad & are attached to outcomes.

[@fuzzypanda1684]

@@SkillofAttraction This is possible. I also spent a lot of time learning about attachments to outcome and worked hard to break myself of that, and recognize whenever it was starting to creep back in. But like learning about mindset, while it made sense and did make me feel better for a while, it made no difference in my life or what my outcomes were. And like trying to maintain an abundance mindset when nothing is working out, eventually it becomes impossible to have no attachment to outcome when the outcome is always negative.

[@Thegamehhh449]

I’m starting to get on her nerves, she is starting to have a short fuse with me, but I always just smile and she tells me with a smile also “you piss me off and just smile about it “ I hope this is the tension in my favor in the future, we do have sex but refuse to go on a date with me

[@SkillofAttraction]

Sounds like she could use a little space in order to miss you a bit. It's counterintuitive, but giving women too much of your time & attention works against you.

[@Thegamehhh449]

@@SkillofAttraction spot on! Thank you sir

[@apeshitphilosophy5221]

I disagree. Women don’t screen 100s of men and they don’t consider 99% of the men that approach them ‘options’ more so ‘nuisances’. Attraction is a biological state which either exists or doesn’t when she encounters someone. If she is in a state of attraction, it’s a rare emotion and occurs within seconds of meeting a man. She then seeks rapport with this man and seeks to put him at comfort around her. There will be short tests from her during the courtship but her behaviour will largely be emotionally pleasant as a woman will trust that feeling more than any ‘red flag’ or ‘mistake’ the man does. When you have dated lots of beautiful like myself and even managed to sleep with some women within 15-30minutes of meeting them, you notice patterns, and the pattern I’ve noticed is that attraction is an emotional STATE a woman is either in or isn’t when you’re around her, there’s no thought processing behind it. Attraction is mainly based on the man’s looks and perceived social status. Anything else which isn’t genuine attraction, is just her manipulating a situation for attention or free dates.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thank you so much for coming here to hold my hand & explain this to me. 🙄 And yes they do screen 100s of men. They screen every man they come in contact with, as I mentioned here: kzbin.infoQl8L1xvwAFw I'm surprised you didn't pick that up that pattern with all the beautiful women you've been with. And no, it's not just about looks & status. Another pattern you missed.

[@apeshitphilosophy5221]

@@SkillofAttraction actually, they know right of the bat if they want to sleep with you, within 5-10 seconds of meeting. Do you call that screening? why would you need to screen someone that your body already feels turned on around! Attraction can be broken down to 6 components - her availability, her age (younger = looking for sex and fun, older = looking for provider and stability), your looks, your status, your perceived neediness/response to her pulling back and the fun emotions you provide when you go on a date.

[@secretbillionaire463]

Another great video.

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks you! Glad you enjoyed it!

[@primaprimavera357]

In “Why men like bitches” she teaches us not to chase, and we don’t chase it’s humiliating. Neither me or my women friends chase men. Attention we can get anywhere, we get it from strangers on the street, from friends, men coworkers, men in gym, men are everywhere give us attention, even gas station, etc. If man acts like a prince he will get nothing. Women with healthy self -esteem who grew up with loving father, those women will never chase men. Only doormats chase men.

[@SkillofAttraction]

The book is full of it, because everyone here can tell you that men certainly don't like bitches by any stretch. In fact men despise them. You may be able to get attention from average, low value beta men who are desperate for female attention, but that won't work with high value men, then men I'm training, who have plenty of female attention themselves & will choose the feminine ladies who understand the masculine/feminine dynamic. So, just understand that with that attitude you're only limiting yourself average & below average men.

[@shamekiawalker6358]

I totally agree lol and no you are not an alpha male If you have to manipulate women to get them to sleep with you lol you’re literally stealing these guys money offering terrible advice. True alpha males can get it just by existing not by playing silly, childish games. No self-respecting woman is going to chase some beta buck loser who acts aloof. It goes against a woman’s nature, that she after a man because males were made to chase. This is true all across the animal kingdom.

[@goranvuletic8873]

I am sorry, but this is something between bluepill and redpill. I am almost 54, and what I saw in my life is that women are as carnal as men are, if not more. If you are good looking, you passed, the rest is of much much minor importance. What you are talking about relates only to about 5% cases in the dating marketplace.

[@SkillofAttraction]

The red pill is only about understanding & accepting a woman's true nature. Blue pill is about living in a fantasy world. What I talk about in this video is only about creating tension. Without it she simply won't be turned on, good looking man or not. This relates to ALL cases. Ignore at your own peril.

[@aerovespr]

12:02 This goes against all my instincts of what I think a decent person should do. Honest disclosure and being straightforward with your intentions put her at ease, create trust, and make you seem less of a creep, is that not the case?

[@SkillofAttraction]

Putting her at ease is doing the opposite of creating tension. Attraction doesn't come from comfort.

[@Thegamehhh449]

Women are like children, they like to have fun, learn, and feel, by being like every love movie ever created, this does not bring excitement out of her, women love to chase in their own way

[@Thegamehhh449]

Women are like children, they like to have fun, learn, and feel, by being like every love movie ever created, this does not bring excitement out of her, women love to chase in their own way

[@sincerelyme7423]

👌👌👌

[@StevenHughes-hr5hp]

Sounds like bs. Creating tension is her job. She will always find the right buttons to push.

[@SkillofAttraction]

No, it's actually your job. Her job is turning it into a relationship & maintaining it.

[@StevenHughes-hr5hp]

@@SkillofAttraction Why exactly would I play head games?

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@StevenHughes-hr5hp Because that's how female attraction works...& sparking & maintaining her attraction is your job.

[@NathalieW-q1t]

Hey, great job this sounds like it’s all based on Celestine Dessike's Words of Desire. And yes, that’s the material you need to have him resonating with erotic electricity at your will. Sounds like too much IK, but just for the basics it's worth go'ogling her ;)

[@SkillofAttraction]

I've never heard of 'Words of Desire' & it looks like it's aimed at women...

[@ritchiemacinnis]

I suppose you might be negligent about mentioning country laws defending the rights of the ASEXUAL.

[@SkillofAttraction]

In don't know any country's laws or rights about being Asexual. Asexuality is extremely rare & considering my focus is on increasing emotional & sexual attraction, it's not something I pay much attention to.

[@ritchiemacinnis]

@@SkillofAttraction when a spouse on a regular basis attempts to increase emotional and sexual attraction it can be unwanted leading to charges of emotional, verbal, mental and sexual abuse.

[@SkillofAttraction]

@@ritchiemacinnis I recommend staying away from women who think that way, because there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Would you consider a woman putting on makeup & a tight fitting dress as abuse? No. What i teach is the male version of that.

[@ahmedkotby3778]

Hello coach I watched your videos and I really love them as they are very informative my problem with my ex is she work in another city away from her family for a month and I was in Russia studying (she is 18 / I'm 21) and we were. Planing on living together and studying . When she came back I didn't notice any changes on her but one day we got in an argument and she said she needed time alone at the beginning I tried to comfort her and know what's wrong but in the end I gave her the space and she broke up after 5 days saying the distance is far away for her and she saying I love you but not in a romantic way and she begged to be friends and u was like ok but I didn't contact her again until 2 weeks after the break up our friends tried to fix things and she agreed to talk to me and then I went to talk to her in private and she said she lost feelings and I was devastated we didn't block each other and we had a good relationship I didn't contact her after this and I apologized for this behavior she didn't ignore my messages at all and after 1 month of no contact she posted a picture of her with someone else on social media and she hid it from me . And 3 days later she went to check my whatsapp Messenger which she used exclusively for me and she didn't say anything and she likes posts about past relationships . Is she gone forever ????

[@SkillofAttraction]

It's difficult to say what will happen, but as far as I can tell, because I don't know the dynamics of your relationship, it was the distance that got to her. Either that, or she had been losing feelings for a while & this new guy caught her eye. All you can do is stay in no contact, work on yourself, & meet/date new girls. This video my be helpful too: kzbin.info/www/bejne/fH_Rd3SYfZygj6s Also, for future reference, please see my pinned comment.

[@ahmedkotby3778]

@@SkillofAttraction it was ldr and we were planning to love together when she asked for space I asked her and her family and even our friends if there was,someone else and even after the break up she denied it and kept saying no I wanted to ask what do I do if I said ok to let's be friends but I just never contacted her again ? And if this is a rebound relationship ? Is there actually hope in her coming back?

[@georgevossen3846]

Thanks!

[@georgevossen3846]

Thank you for helping last time

[@SkillofAttraction]

And thank you for the 'super thanks'!

[@mokyan7]

Thanks!

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thank you very much!

[@gnocchi.artyst]

Thanks!

[@SkillofAttraction]

Thanks, man! Much appreciated!