criminal minds humor

featuring 90% reid, 30% hotch, 27% prentiss, and 22.5% garcia. or something.
spent a while on this video bc i wanted to make it perfect and then i realized was overthinking things. please enjoy!
love,
emily
sidenote: the music cuts off at the end but that’s cuz i really love that scene and the music is hecka loud so i compromised. anyways. :D
ps i don’t own anything!
Copyright Disclaimer:
Under section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, education and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.

[@MatthewvMayo]

"Let's see you profile a disorganized psychopath." I'm dead.

[@hahaifarded3047]

Guess they were too late :-//

[@dzzlinglypeachy_c7396]

Cat Man oh my god

[@bananachip7937]

1x19 machismo!

[@ixchelr2953]

Cat Man oh God

[@kanikagaral7637]

She probably can.

[@sopie97burr96]

I love when Garcia was like; "Talk Dirty to me." JJ's face is like; "Get out of this one Morgan."

[@calissamonroe1580]

Frl tho

[@Lonewolfmike]

Hotch, "Keep it clean, and don't call me honey." LOL

[@mementomori9844]

@@Lonewolfmike "remind me to get her drug tested"

[@Lonewolfmike]

@@mementomori9844 She doesn't needs drugs she is Garicia she is wired differently and we love her for it.

[@mementomori9844]

@@Lonewolfmike it was a quote from the show lol

[@addiet4875]

A literal murder going on: Morgan: babygurl

[@nashidragneel4980]

Baby gorl

[@magpie7938]

The fake FBI agent trying to pick up Prentiss was my favorite cold open ever

[@gizmokat8321]

you do know that's not a cold open???? A cold open is in a live show, it means without rehearsal, or at least very little. SNL has them a lot. I think you just mean opening scene.

[@magpie7938]

GizmoKat 83 Sorry, but cold open also refers to different shows like the office. That was the first word that came to mind and for me, it is correct. It broke the audience into a show before the theme played. 🤷‍♀️

[@gizmokat8321]

@@magpie7938 When the office did live episodes or live parts of episodes maybe but for scripted drama's or police procedurals, it's just called an opening scene. Cold open originated in theater. Most people don't use the term Cold Open unless it's a live show, even though the definition includes scenes before the theme song, which is most shows now, back in the day the theme song came before any scene. Cold Open is used less often these days because so many shows use an opening scene before the theme. I asked my writer friend and he said it usually a term they use for live tv. They just use opening scene for scripted.

[@magpie7938]

GizmoKat 83 okay but still I use it. and its not incorrect as you said & it isn't hurting anyone. I won't respond after this

[@gizmokat8321]

@@magpie7938 oh my gosh I wasn't trying to sound like I was being jerk... butI think I might have. I really just wanted to point out its more current usage. I AM SORRY!!!! I overexplain sometimes.

[@JESUSROCKS921]

The 3 BAU women at the bar scene is hilarious every time!!!😂😂😂

[@arellasamuel7866]

Garcia saying Quan-tea-co had me dead

[@jessycartell1996]

Arella Samuel did you see this one kzbin.info/www/bejne/an2smaaFoZiln6c

[@axolotl7084]

women* they have names

[@JESUSROCKS921]

@@axolotl7084 thanks for the correction and I know their names it was just easier to say it that way

[@craft9311]

Episodem

[@sleepysmartboy6287]

"You kick like a 9 year old girl" That is both hilarious and so sad..

[@frexdari2510]

Read this as Reid said it 😂

[@srig3649]

I’ve been kicked by a nine year old once, a while ago I’m pretty sure I still have bruises

[@Cr0sh._.N3x]

what episode was that-? i completely forgot but i know i’ve seen it before

[@melarie205]

@@Cr0sh._.N3x season 1 ep6 “l.d.s.k”

[@andiestrauss8926]

"la cah-suh del pero" "La casita del perro" "That's what I said."

[@sandracruz1163]

i miss Elle, she should’ve stayed

[@char-586]

It’s Sandra ikr 😩

[@lifeisbitvlover171]

Reid says 'the dog's house' and Elle says 'the dog's little house' if you translate it litteraly

[@NatSan031]

LifeIsBi TVLover yeah I was about to say the same thing technically Spencer is right

[@jessycartell1996]

It’s Sandra she made a tribute to the show kzbin.info/www/bejne/an2smaaFoZiln6c

[@iceprincess1898]

I love the one where Gideon tells Hotch he's the best unit chief he knows and Hotch replies with an unimpressed, "Jason I'm the only unit chief you know" Edit: I think I'm famous now.

[@evelynjuarez8123]

"Where did you find this kid?" "He was left in a basket on the steps of the FBI" I died😂😂

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

Lol Rossi Lmfao

[@milcevicoco4899]

BAHSHAHSHAHAHHHAHAHA

[@Eszra]

It was so cute!

[@kelsiecox8604]

what episode is that?

[@mizzyahyah5080]

What episode

[@laytonpro8655]

I love when Hotch cracks a joke, it’s so out of character for the uptight, tie wearing agent

[@jbreezy101]

Drug tested is my favorite

[@MaryamKhan-tu4qn]

@@jbreezy101 "Remind me to get ger drug tested"

[@SingingSealRiana]

And most of them are around about and for reid Did you join a boyband ?

[@IiI_Gogeta_IiI]

Here is the interesting thing, hotch isnt uptight he is fairly laid back i think he pretends to be uptight but he is unironically the funniest character simply because you dont expect him to crack a joke lol if you watch scenes where he isnt at work he is the biggest goober around XD

[@sarahoh2089]

Tbh nothing is gonna top when Spencer screamed in Derek's phone

[@lifeisbitvlover171]

"We interrupt your regularly scheduled musical selection with a very important announcement. Never wage a practical joke war with an MIT graduate cause we have a history of going nuclear. Now sit back, relax and enjoy the dulcet sounds of me screaming in your ear" *screaming* "Alright, kid, that was cute. But that's all you got?" *phone rings* "hey babyg-" *screaming* "Alright, Reid, it's on"

[@sabrinaheizenrader5635]

That and Rossi saying Reid was left in a basket on the FBI steps are my favorites

[@mirimke4163]

From what episode is that?

[@mia-ib3ye]

@@mirimke4163 (if you haven't already seen/found it) season 7 episode 4, i believe

[@mirimke4163]

@@mia-ib3ye thank you 💕

[@anniesdrawings6578]

3:30 Emily, JJ, and Penelope are badasses for showing him that out right to prove to him who he was actually dealing with 😂

[@zulmasanchez1108]

What episode was that

[@bananachip7937]

2x21!

[@mapo5730]

That scene gave me LIFE

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

I love that scean sooooo much!

[@tmac2744]

Well, if you watch the whole scene, not just the piece shown in this clip, they string him along for a few minutes before they hit him with the punchline. Personally, I think the longer setup makes the payoff better.

[@thenosieyartist6924]

"One last favor...look up 'sexy' and 'brilliant' on that computer if yours" *confused stares from every woman in the room* "Well look at that....its meee~" "You are a GODDESS woman! Ciao." *stares continues* "It was...ir was a work call..."

[@Thewrightchoices4u]

The type of hyping up I need

[@izzy-zy5yj]

"You're the best unit chief I know!" "Jason, I'm the only unit chief you know."

[@hirahiro2331]

Well he did say the best lol

[@introvertspeaks]

Just like how I wrote "you're the best manager I had" in my manager's birthday card. It was my first job. 😅

[@ashleyhimika3538]

*”i hate vegas.”*

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

Lol

[@herebemaddy150]

"jJ i sWEaR tO GOD"

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

@@herebemaddy150 lmfao

[@ixchelr2953]

“I see you brought your own computer” 😂😂😂

[@mirimke4163]

Do you know from what episode that is?

[@samiajunaid7021]

@@mirimke4163 I think S3 finale.

[@SingingSealRiana]

He ain't wrong

[@fionam7768]

That two-parter is (BIG CALL COMING) my favourite episode E-VAH. Today. Today, it's my favourite evah: many days, even. Including today. Must go stream....

[@Swampfactor]

"You're holding him like a cantaloupe." - Jessica Brooks, 2006

[@VyTran-lo5uy]

1:58 Hotch's deadpan way of saying that just makes it funnier

[@gillianfleischer5620]

No emotion in his voice 😂

[@florenciacea2738]

“ Oh Reid, i love it when you say Butt” SOO UNDERATED😍

[@Techlove16]

And then his eyebrow raise right after that HAH

[@jaed4]

one of my personal favorites is “i’m not sleeping with reid.” spence looks so offended and it gets me every time!

[@jaed4]

oh! or “when you’re talking what makes you feel like an expert?” “statistics.” “NO.” the immediate shut down.

[@jaed4]

“what did you join a boy band?” is another good one.

[@mrsmatthewgraygubler-4-ever]

i'm not sleeping with reid, is something i would NEVER say.

[@jaed4]

@@mrsmatthewgraygubler-4-ever you and me both

[@nessyness5447]

It sounded like a big brother being all " no mom, i am not going to share the room with baby brother!".

[@notwerkinginthishouse8634]

When Elle was describing an unsub and she added he is a complete psychopath, remember that ?

[@deadgirl1785]

Garcia’s back must hurt from carrying the comedy of this show

[@JKshoutoKags]

I loved the 3 ladies being savages against the fake agent

[@genikki]

Have you ever noticed that Garcia's ID has Derek Morgan's signature?

[@jessycartell1996]

genikki did you see this vid kzbin.info/www/bejne/an2smaaFoZiln6c

[@honeyfruitcup]

“Talk dirty to me”

[@zemer2940]

No.

[@xxlost_soulxx4974]

"This is section chief Erin Strousse" (Idk how to spell her last name)

[@Caithlinn13]

@@xxlost_soulxx4974 Strauss I think?

[@erin1674]

@Ashley Ramos LMAOO

[@hirahiro2331]

*awkward silence*

[@PrincessUnicornRainbow69]

"why? does that freak you out?" "very much so"

[@nessyness5447]

I am a woman and it feaked me out to the time i felt it on my pregnant cousin. It's like there is an alien in there...

[@hirahiro2331]

I remember when my mother was pregnant with my brother. Bruh, I was a fighter. He kicked, I hit her stomach and that was the first a last time I've touched my mom's stomach before my brother was born.

[@PrincessUnicornRainbow69]

@@nessyness5447 i can imagine! that’s scary 😬

[@samantha-dg2we]

the brad scene is the most ICONIC woman empowerment scene in tv history

[@miraculouslover6645]

I loved all of these. But I think you forgot that one episode where someone in the fbi has to make a whole meeting because of the language Garcia and Morgan used. 😂😂😂

[@bananachip7937]

ooh i guess i did... thanks!! i guess i’ll have to put in another video!! 😁

[@klea496]

What ep is that?

[@miraculouslover6645]

@@klea496 If im not mistaken its season 9 episode 12!

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

Lol yup

[@sleepysmartboy6287]

@@bananachip7937 _Ooh nooo, we'll have to watch another one of these videos? Whatever shall we do?_ /s

[@godwyncorry2466]

Where did you find this kid? He was left in a basket on the stairs of The FBI. ✨✨

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

Omg I lobe that scean sooo much lol Rossi lmfao

[@atsuart6670]

Phoenix Star Phoenix Star I clicked on your pfp because I thought it was going to be a quote that was used on the show 😆 I was wrong

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

@@atsuart6670 Lmao Nope but the Quote is me lmfao

[@atsuart6670]

Phoenix Star yeah lmao I’ve chocked on air more than once, I’ve fallen up the stairs twice in 7th grade, and I’ve tripped on nothing more than I’d like to 😅

[@skyegrey-lance8004]

@@atsuart6670 Lmao me to!

[@idek938]

Spencer: “I’m about to get naked, so they can scrub me down. Is that really something you wanna see?“ Me: well I mean...... 😁😜

[@kaylaM123-w8p]

I literally just said😂😂

[@marzadky4934]

Exactly, "I wanna see how much you packing!" Seems like a very nice phrase to go here

[@Hoss04-05]

Tf is wrong with yall

[@ashleeisswagger2865]

Cory Schulze a lot...... and have you seen him?

[@Hoss04-05]

@@ashleeisswagger2865 i dont roll that way .

[@cedent.6909]

3:22 the way Paget says "your badge" got me feeling some type of way omg

[@toddvandell85]

Derek: "You gotta date? With who?" Emily: "A hot tub." Derek: "Oh. Now *that* sounds like a party." Emily: "You're *SO* not invited.

[@davidshulimson9491]

I'll always love this scene from "Empty Planet": Reid: "Can we stop at a bookstore? It'll only take me 10 minutes." Gideon: "To buy it or read it?" Reid: "Both, actually."

[@naevisparx9699]

"Well let's see you profile a disorganized psychopath." He's so damn sassy 😭💀

[@shayemerson6673]

“Your holding him like a cantaloupe “ I DIED

[@Caroline28483]

"Hotch still here?" "Oh, I'm pretty sure he lives here." Penelope's delivery here cracks me up every time

[@adugie3827]

“where’d u find this kid?” rossi: “he was left on a basket on the steps of the FBI”

[@mrsmatthewgraygubler-4-ever]

i loved that part. (laughing)

[@syabilaazri7834]

Best superhero origin story i ever heard

[@florenciacea2738]

I loved this, please keep making these kinds of videos, it’s the only things keeping me sane:)

[@bananachip7937]

aww! 😊 i’ll definitely try 😁

[@lys_sadge]

Especially in *quarantine*

[@marthaloustaunau9366]

@@bananachip7937 f2s.

[@bananachip7937]

candy Loustaunau sorry, what does f2s mean?

[@JC130676]

1:08 The way all the women turn to look at Morgan - brilliant!

[@lifeisbitvlover171]

Wouldn't you!? 😂😂

[@hirahiro2331]

@@lifeisbitvlover171 I'd be pretty sus of that convo too lol

[@ardenalexa94]

Yep. Lol. I think they were all a little jelly of Garcia at that moment. 😂

[@wakeshimutanemahazunakunam819]

2:25 In this episode we learned: Reid still can't aim Reid got beaten up by 9 year old girls when he was twelve.

[@charleysonnydickinsonvuori7833]

AWW I love Spencer and Hotch. They are definitely my favourite characters on the show.

[@royaneekhalil6488]

Same. Them and JJ... When Hotch left, it destroyed the show for me

[@noodlejuice2746]

My all time favorite is “remind me to get her drug tested” after talking to Garcia

[@princesak-drama7832]

En que minuto dijo eso?

[@Brooke-of4si]

Okay but Laila and Reid in the pool "I uh... I fElL iN tHe PoOl" "YeAh I'm SuRe ThEiRs PicTuReS"

[@glitchxmars7415]

Reid: im about to get naked Morgan: *gay panic*

[@juliannaf.3074]

“ ‘cause of the inherent absence of light! ” i freakin’ love this line so much.. 😂

[@theboogeyman2590]

"I thought you were gonna talk to him about spending some vacation time?" "What's vacation time?"

[@maggie3842]

I’d like to add the scene where Spencer tells his mom that he’s “been seeing things”, while visiting her in the facility she lives in and she goes “DON’T SAY THAT” and frantically looks around if anyone heard. That took me so off guard I laughed, I’m not sure if that was intended to be a joke

[@larastroud6644]

Reid’s mom was always the perfect blend of comedy and horror

[@InkAndPoet]

I love how flirty Morgan is with Garcia, yet they know how to keep it just friends.

[@yivanayang]

same, I really love their friendship and how they aren't romantic with each other. I think it's interesting how they are flirty, very close with each other and don't really give off a sibling vibe yet despite that, they don't give off any romantic vibes either, like i've never once felt that there was anything romantic between them. The actors really did a good job in conveying how the characters have chemistry but not romantic chemistry, really showing viewers a very wholesome positive female and male friendship :)

[@galaxywolf695]

3:05 I love how Morgan acted like an overprotective older brother 😊

[@abigaillee4174]

okay but every inappropriate conversation between garcia and anyone on the team when she was expecting morgan and got someone else was absolutely amazing and like ive said before hotch's and spence's relationship is ideal.

[@katielemmon2581]

Oh more please. Please gave us more. Love all the team but there something about Garcia and there is something about Spencer that make me love just a bit more. Thank you!!

[@bananachip7937]

:D

[@dangita5664]

the way Gideon is saying " don't call me for anything, have a great time, you all deserve a break " then comes back and insists on "Seriously , don't call " ..lol

[@SakshiGupta-sd3rn]

What episode was this?

[@georgiaokeefe6597]

I love the scene “Talk dirty to me” “This is chief Erin Strauss”

[@ipeace6145]

I always loved Jason. He low-key made me laugh. He made dad jokes without smiling which I find hilarious

[@TheSkandyCandy]

3:59 I love annoying baby brother Reid!!

[@jimsweet3608]

"I see you brought your own computer." My favorite LOL line. Also it sorta sums up Reid, too!

[@simply_bxlla6671]

JJ: why? Does it freak you out? Spencer: very much so.

[@toddvandell85]

Emily: "Ugh. This is really gonna suck."

[@margotmignet3803]

Can you tell me what episode it is please

[@jemmaisweird]

@@margotmignet3803i believe season 4 ep 9, “52 Pickup”

[@mrinalini9112]

Hotch outlawyering the lawyer will always be on every awesome list. Period.

[@natberries000]

“he was left in a basket on the steps of the fbi” iconic.

[@MyGamer125]

2:12 Morgan: I thought was calling the Office of Supreme Genius Garcia: Well gorgeous, you’ve be rerouted to the Office of Too Freakin’ Bad Underrated Garcia line

[@mikaylabutler56]

the part when hotch tries to hold jack “you’re holding him like a cantaloupe” 😭😭

[@frankyforte475]

Let's see you profile a disorganized psychopath- favourite Hotch line ever

[@xorwr]

"oh reid i love it when you say butts" i love garcia and reids friendship

[@esthervizcainoruiz403]

3:02 “i see your brought your own computer” *cheff kiss*

[@toddvandell85]

Hotch: "Just keep it clean and don't call me honey."

[@lucybug72]

2:35 and yet, he lives in the dark, like open some blinds bruh

[@raventhew2034]

Hotch: "Nice shot" Reid: "I was aiming for his leg" Me: Dying of laughter

[@mrsmatthewgraygubler-4-ever]

so was i, i was like how the hell did you hit him in the head when you where aiming for his leg? but hay it got the job done he stopped the bad gut, so good job baby.

[@hirahiro2331]

Audience: ...Ah-oh...Go-good job

[@thatonerandomchicken4665]

0:49 The glare gives me LIFE

[@caldidurmum8520]

0:11 looks like a boy scout in that outfit

[@skye9850]

"It helps if they think you're crazy, they won't argue" 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@charlieandrews7822]

"Hotch you're the best unit chief I know" "Jason, I'm the only unit chief you know" I'm legit dying rn this is gold

[@Sportsgeek1991]

When elle spoke Spanish ❤❤❤

[@MoonGoddessAlthea]

Oohh my god! When JJ, Emily and Penelope show up that fake FBI guy it gives me a reason to live

[@Alice18.17]

The best seasons are the ones with Morgan,Reid, Prentiss, JJ, hotch ,Rossi and garcia

[@hirahiro2331]

S2- S3 and up.

[@livinwitharock5tarr]

I love morgan and Garcia’s relationship

[@marybee8663]

"Can at least one of you look like your going to see me again" like seriously they all looked like they wouldn't see him again

[@Steffi.Morgenstern.5388]

What episode is this from?? I can't remember....

[@sharkdentures3247]

"Why are you still afraid of the dark?" "Because of the inherent absence of light." I busted out laughing at that one! (perfection)

[@Bobaxbulbasaur]

0:38 you’re holding him like a cantaloupe. Hahahaahaha

[@brookcrow]

2:26 the eye brow raise 💀💀

[@elizabethdawson6868]

1:44 I love him!

[@__pumpkin_heads___]

..same..

[@raitalkstoomuch]

i love this show 😂

[@En-0804]

0:18 Hotch's face literaly said "tf- does IT LOOK LIKE I CAN DO THAT?!?!"

[@shayemerson6673]

“Hotch you kick like a 9 year old kid”

[@WenzelSays]

The fake fbi guy scene has been living rent free in my head for the better part of a decade. And it still gets me. Everytime.

[@hotdamndan9892]

Hotch, you're the best unit chief I know! Hotch: I'm the only Unit Chief you know. Season 1 to 5 Hotch humor are the best.

[@notwerkinginthishouse8634]

We need Garcia and Reid duo

[@melaniavanaernam2569]

“yOuR hOlDinG HiM liKe A cAnTaLoUpE”

[@ch3sh1recat73]

“ *he was left in a basket on the steps of the fbi* ”

[@milliekearney6071]

He’s so lifelike

[@angemaidment5640]

Reid’s reasoning of why he’s afraid of the dark is amazingly rational.

[@carenxatu5962]

This was therapeutic. Thank you.

[@aubreeo1943]

notice how they’re all from the first seasons 🥺🥺

[@danielarosindo]

I read a comment about the Rossi one: he was left in a basket on the steps of the FBI. Rossi never said Reid was left there as a baby. Imagine Dr Spencer Reid, adult and sitting in a basket waiting to be let in....

[@kosai8644]

Penelope and Morgan’s interactions are my favorite. They never run out of nicknames for each other😭😂😂

[@cowboytori]

“That’s what i said” HES 🥺🥺🥺🥺

[@georgiareed923]

1:55 i miss Gideon :((

[@abrildavalos8056]

He’s so life like

[@elfsuperjunior4ever]

I forgot which episode but garcia was on speaker and she said “what are you gonna spank me” or something the reaction is so funny

[@caitlinlopez7027]

I still laugh when Penelope said: "Talk dirty to me" thinking it was Derek while at the same time Jennifer is laughing at Derek being uncomfortable.

[@milaleila7161]

gideon is so underratedly funny