CryptoLand - The Fyre festival of Crypto

[@Empyreal_90]

basically building epstein's island - best comment of 2022 so far my man!

[@Hugh839]

It'd be weird to find Prince Andrew is your neighbour there.

[@saltynadsack]

Might have a tie with "one natural disaster will wipe them all out" 😂

[@cloudzack1090]

I was thinking the same fucking thing lol.

[@liamcollinson5695]

It's not too far from the truth when it looks like a school kids dream and they is the whole thing about them saying the age of consent will go of mental mutarity 🤮

[@Dragon-Believer]

They wish it was Epstein's island.

[@kingdomrains]

If Mental Maturity was the age of consent then these people would never breed

[@ItsaJuraff]

Hence the "more than enough"

[@joshuaporterfield6774]

Most went to begin with.

[@gandalf_thegrey]

Sometimes im just so freaking happy that im a normie and interested in .... just women The amount of time i screamed at my PC "STOP DIDDLING KIDS YOU DICKHEAD" in the past months seeing videos like this is unbelievable.

[@3dartxsi]

Mind you, they are selling 'parcels' not houses, not lodges, not condos, just parcels. You pay 3/4 of a million for a patch of land and YOU have to build something on it.

[@jackmaney4276]

Who wants to bet that if this *actually* ends up happening, the parcels not only will be completely undeveloped, but won't have any hookups for electricity, any access to fresh water, etc?

[@TR-qf2gt]

fyre festival x10000 lol

[@xbit2011]

I was a PADI diving instructor on an island quite similar to the one shown in the video in the maledives. From personal experience I know that fresh water, electricity, internet connection and food (besides fish) is always a huge problem. Big financial resorts are renting out bungalows for a few days and have a constant financial turnover. Maintaining such a place which will fall array to the salty air in no time is an incredible costly task.

[@Marci124]

They are not promising any development in the whitepaper, in fact they state explicitly it's not really their problem. No promises of any infrastructure either.

[@nickyblue4866]

Is there even any infrastructure on their crypto island?

[@Trozomuro]

Please.

[@notribadsvault]

They really named the coin mascot “Conny”

[@BoldTint]

Postal 4 still did it better.

[@bananasinfrench]

Just saying it outright aren't they

[@andhieyusuf7008]

Conny 2022

[@alexmoon3844]

No I in team but there's con in economy.

[@DyingBobby]

Conny the con artist

[@dubioushumor9243]

I usually feel bad when people lose money in one of these crypto scams, but this changes my mind. I want every single person that invests in this to lose everything they have.

[@Mat-ky5gr]

This truly is the scammer get scammed era and I say good. These people are unbearable.

[@AndyMush]

Same. I feel the same way about NFT holders too

[@basharalassad1073]

agreed if they cant take responsebility with money

[@zuzoscorner]

yeah, if they fall for this, there just no hope for humanity for them.

[@inconspicuoushoodie4504]

Honestly if you're gonna destroy the environment in your pursuit for money you deserve to get scammed

[@ladyteruki]

I love how one minute they wipe their butts with physical money and the next they're bathing in coins. Perfect metaphor for what crypto is : "the same thing as before, except it's ours". Talk about changing the world.

[@youtube-kit9450]

That's just the libertarian's creed.

[@Theguyoverthere603]

I read a book about this once. It was called “Lord of the Flies” or something.

[@soup_pigeon]

oh no

[@TooLateForIeago]

Nah, Jack Merridew had something like integrity.

[@cinematical9213]

And I played a video game about this! I think it was called Bioshock or something.

[@Vee_Sheep]

are you sure? maybe it was "The Island of Dr. Moreau", but idk about your books and book experience lol

[@battlion507]

@@Vee_Sheep The book? More like the movie starring Val Kilmer.

[@Aquelll]

Did nobody tell them that Casinos are illegal in Fiji? They think they can make up their own rules if they own land in Fiji? 🤔

[@sithlordhibiscus9936]

they don't understand basic bird biology. "casinos are illegal" is Harvard.

[@attilamagyar91]

It's not a casino. It's a place where you can spend your money for chances to get more money. Its a game.

[@kumomo_yosei]

​@@attilamagyar91Japan moment

[@ORITHEDREAMER]

@@attilamagyar91i can’t tell if this is a joke response or not

[@planescaped]

@@ORITHEDREAMER I... _think_ it's a joke. Probably...

[@patrickfoster8335]

FYI... the person who created that seagull model asked them to remove it.

[@scorpiowarrior7841]

Seriously? So how many of these assets are actually theirs?

[@ReD-zc3uu]

And got insta-blocked by these guys on Twitter. Without even a chance of talking about the matter.

[@TheYdyp]

@@ReD-zc3uu Well all he has to do is DMCA their ass on youtube and block their video. And no way in hell can you explain that using the seagull in an advertisement video is fair use ;)

[@ReD-zc3uu]

@@TheYdyp I hope that artist will do that and obliterate this clown fiesta shitshow for good... (Also I hope others who got their assets stolen will join that fight)

[@hope-cat4894]

@@TheYdyp This is one of the few times doing a DMCA takedown makes you the good guy.

[@cheken4326]

The best part Callum is you've not even scratched the surface with this mess. They haven't even bought the island, and are claiming that all purchases of these plots are "safe" because you'll get your money back if they don't make it past a $50 million goal, while also silently saying that they actually need $100 million to complete the project and not saying where they'll get that other $50 million

[@Chris-pu9sh]

Where do all the people life who have to work on the island? Gardeners, electricians, plummers, service staff and so on?

[@idontevenknow9758]

Also, what happens if for whatever reason, whomever they are buying the island from (it's the government in general correct?), what if they decide to change the price? What if they pull the plug and decide not to sell the island after raising the $50 mil? Also, I'm just thinking off the top of my head, how long will it take to even secure the island's purchase? It could take years for all we know. I'm mostly just spit balling thoughts but buying any real estate especially in a country that has their own laws is super complex.

[@exxelsetijadi5348]

@@idontevenknow9758 the island is in Fiji so yes, i think they will be buying it from the government (not sure though, i'm no expert in these kinds of dealings) what makes me also mad aside from the crypto stuff, is that if, and *IF* they manage to buy the island, i am certain they'll somehow end up environmentally destroying the island, before abandoning it should they fail at developing the island

[@idontevenknow9758]

@@exxelsetijadi5348 that sounds like if they actually buy the island the most likely outcome. It will be covered in incomplete structures and trash after being abandoned once they run out of money.

[@ChaosKnuxxx]

They're gonna get $50 million from selling their nft collection, duh!

[@Wrswest]

What gets me about the cryptoland presentation video is that if you wanted to make a satire animation mocking crypto people, you would make exactly the same video. And yet they somehow made this _unironically?!_

[@Nejvyn]

"Why don't we take all the cryptobros ... and put them somewhere far away?"

[@MasoTrumoi]

Cryptobros and the investor crowd in general aren't usually good at art. They don't realize it looks ironic because they don't grasp irony.

[@Wrswest]

@@MasoTrumoi It's not even just the art, though - every single word in this just comes off as parody. I mean, the _bitconnect memorial?!_ Wasn't that infamously literally a scam?

[@exxelsetijadi5348]

@@Wrswest as Callum said in the video, they most likely don't care that it was a scam. they only care that it was related to crypto, their brand image

[@l0rf]

Yeah I kept thinking that I couldn't really tell if they're serious or if it is satire. Who is this meant to attract?

[@FuelDropforthewin]

When the promotional video said "They have spent half a million dollars of their own money already" I was like... and? The level of infrastructure that this project needs, power, water (presumably a desalination plant since I am not seeing a reservoir on that island), sewerage, waste processing, insane construction costs due to having to bring in all the heavy machinery from off island, having to clear forest for construction... trying to make this remotely sustainable is a multi-billion dollar project minimum (costs will be high because it's an island and thus transporting workers, resources, and equipment to and from the island are going to be inflated). Half a million isn't even going to register.

[@alexh2413]

The Dashcon of crypto

[@ImNotJust]

The entire project will easily be in the hundreds of millions.

[@thejohnleos]

They spent more on the damn video

[@Wungolioth]

Where are you going to put a waste water treatment plant on such a small island? Anywhere you put it, you'll smell it everywhere.

[@goosegas2087]

Movies don't even cost half a million lol.

[@khandimahn9687]

I can't wait to see Callum's update after he looks deeper and finds things like the fact that THEY HAVEN'T EVEN BOUGHT THE ISLAND YET!

[@Archangelm127]

And the fairly-literal cult. Don't forget the cult they're forming.

[@ElysianAura]

Unsurprising considering this is clearly just to sell the nft

[@SianaGearz]

@@Archangelm127 what do you mean forming... You can't form something that is already there!

[@aslandus]

"Yet" feels like a strong word to use, that would imply they actually planned to buy the island and this wasn't just another scheme to filch money out of gullible rubes

[@solidzaku2]

I'm all for this. Could you imagine all these braindead fancy lads stuck together on an abandoned island with no infrastructure, abandoned there while the Craptoland owner flies off with the money? It would be like lord of the flies. And I must see it.

[@ridhosamudro2199]

I really like the unexpected "oh Christ Ethereum took a tumble" for some reason

[@MrDiggityaus]

I know right haha

[@jdevlin1910]

"they've just got some random asian guy and stuck him on a pedestal" this is a great way of summarizing the depth of this entire culture.

[@ashanarchy7255]

Thats actually the stolen asset. theres a youtube creator, if I can find it ill link it, but he basically teaches 3d modelling and he 3d modelled his own head pulling a ridiculous face.

[@DragonAceSg7]

I was confused why you'd need a members-only club on an island for members only, but I seriously doubt these people will clean up after themselves or maintain the streets so you're going to need staff too. Where are they going to live? I do love how much copyrighted music is in this, including stuff from Nintendo, Warner bros/DC, and Disney. And this isn't for entertainment purposes, they're selling something with it.

[@GGG_gaming]

dont forget lambo since they are literally plugging in lambo atleast 3 times in this video

[@markusnavergard2387]

yeah these fucks are gonna get sued so hard. I mean WB/ Disney and nintendo are not know for allowing their copyrighted stuff in advertisment they do not own. These Cryptobros are gonna soon find out that they are messing with some titans here.

[@HarverTheSlayer]

Oh, and don't forget Iron Maiden as well, since Eddie's face appears in the bloody pinball machine.

[@markusnavergard2387]

@@HarverTheSlayer yup. noted that to. it is Powerslave and brave new world album covers mashed together.

[@andrewcullen2527]

Yea that's my real question, how is staffing to be handled, like no way will that place (or its inhabitants) would survive without cleaning staff, cooks, severs, DJs, the luggage guys, all that shit. And guess what if it really is some island off Fiji then likely those people don't gotta be treated fair or right or even get paid well. Would love to see what they demand people do as a job there and the petty amount of money they would get in return

[@TimmHenson]

"look at the quality of this 3d animation" gets me every time. I notice crypto dream dealers always sell a promise first and deliver never.

[@kyuubey7688]

Look at the eyes. They're souless and empty

[@peger]

Arent you a smart fella. I'm Colonel Doctor Jeff Sanders. And I'm here today to give you a offer of you life time. It's a brand new medicine. But weit it's not like any medicine. My patented oil is made in 100% from snake. :D

[@GrumpyIan]

The models are quality but the lip syncing is so off.

[@DuckTheFinn]

To my animator eyes the animation is so low quality, while the models are a mix of quality (probably bought) models and cursed diy-models. The animation is also a cursed mix of mocap and hand keyed animations, just look ta those broken shoulders and dead eyes. But thats on par on what id expect an ad for a shitfest like this to look like lmao

[@peger]

@@DuckTheFinn the bird has been stolen.

[@SleepNeed]

I checked Google found the listing for the island as it stands now. To say it's undeveloped would be an understatement. Currently, it has two (dirt) roads across the island connecting the jetty to various staff houses, generators, water tanks, some guest homes, a stable, and the mansion that the current owner built. Current generators (no idea how they are powered but likely oil/gas powered) and water tanks (no idea if rainwater or imported) are not big enough to support the amount of population they are pitching, so they'll have to be redone at great expense unless it's some libertarian utopia where there are no public utilities and you are left to fend for yourself. Food will have to be imported, so costs go up even more. Salt air will make the maintenance cost to that clubhouse and buildings will be a nightmare as well due to corrosion. No existing paved roadways (there are horse riding trails) means that they'll have to build new, and that's not cheap (without clearing the jungle) if you want it to last more than a day. This is such an obvious scam or extremely optimistic that it's not even funny. This is going to make Fyre Festival look like Lalapalooza by comparison.

[@avaspongeriffic]

>some libertarian utopia where there are no public utilities and you are left to fend for yourself you absolutely know that's how they're gonna spin it once they realize they can't feasibly develop an entire island lol

[@princesscrystal6410]

@@avaspongeriffic already happened, Grafton NH and a cruise ship

[@SeppelSquirrel]

My biggest questions: 1. WHERE DO THE ISLAND STAFF LIVE?? 2. What's the plans for sanitation? 3. It's going to rain a ton, but everything is outdoors. What's their plan there? 4. What is security going to look like? 5. WHERE ARE THE EMERGENCY MEDICAL SERVICES??? 6. If you look at the shot with the gym, nobody is ripped at all. Why? Lol. 7. How much ETH did that lady charge to spend time with that crypto bro? 8. They didn't show off the Vladimir Club at all. What are thEy PosSibly going To bE hiding IN there?

[@hjalfi]

I was thinking about many of these too, but I think I can answer #6 for you: because then they'd have to create two different humanoid models and that would have been work.

[@kingdomrains]

I also don't see any docking facilities for barges to deliver large equipment or bulk goods, that yacht pier is completely unsuitable. No power facilities or water storage either.

[@Saieras]

The answer to #8 is mentally mature people.

[@hjalfi]

@@kingdomrains I'm also going to guess that the half-size space shuttle and external tank parked on the helipad isn't going to be particularly helpful. (2:08)

[@fatalityin1]

fyi they did not yet buy the island, but their dream island is not even 200 meters away from main island fiji, the water there is so shallow, you could most likely walk to their super secret escape-island from the resort next to them. Just to be fair, most of your questions are moot, because they are basically in fiji. Yet other more concerning problems arise: internet, plumbing, electricity. They also want to buy that island via crowdfunding. And a buyer of land has to pay additionally for his house to be built. And on fiji an nft is not a certificate for land ownership. Also visa. And the island is almost completely flat, you can view it on google world in 3d (if interested I post the name of the island), it would require a single tropical storm to flaten all their buildings

[@kurovah5475]

The word Crypto gets used so often it eventually stops registering as a word

[@demon2441]

It reminds me of when people use 'like' multiple times a sentence as a filler word.

[@sonetagu1337]

Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo...

[@Fiery891]

Some of the animations are stolen. Creators have been contacting them saying to take it down or at least credit them but the Cryptoland twitter has been blocking them instead.

[@xaviaxs]

they want to pile lawsuits with just one video

[@LikaLaruku]

Guess the creators need to be informed of how to issue a DMCA.

[@whovo3059]

@@xaviaxs must have already have some filled as the video is now privated.

[@lorekeeper685]

@@LikaLaruku I think it is been slow, but I heard they stole stuff from Disney, if they get involved it's over. Disney sueing the cryptoland, and becoming a hero would be so wild

[@Nenilein]

I'm an animator,and I'm pretty sure the protagonist's model is derived from a non-commercial model called "Malcolm" by an organization called anim school, that young animators use to train. Using Malcolm in commercial projects in any way is NOT allowed...

[@randomizer1666]

"Wait, they've actually bought a fuckin' island?" No, they have a purchase agreement with the country of Fiji to potentially buy the island if they can raise the capital...

[@elbruces]

Had.

[@bread8465]

@@elbrucesLol

[@matthewwest2482]

Their animation is some parody/ satire type stuff. However they literally are banning people for laughing at their cartoon.

[@gilolaes4725]

Then they shouldn't have written such funny jokes in it.

[@xellios]

Not only that, they have the balls to say they are UNDER ATTACK, Because people are calling it out for the cringe that it is. Unreal.

[@patate87548]

It reminds me of the animation in the first Lego Island game to be honest.

[@wazzzup2579]

They look like those bootleg kids animations found in pirated CDs across Southeast Asia or east europe Lmao

[@Shatterstar]

Just checked the video, comments are turned off and so is ratings.

[@mousepotatodoesstuff]

"do you want to be part of the world's first physical crypto island?" - "no." That's a big mood right there.

[@BKPrice]

"Who with 3 quarters of a million dollars saw this and said, 'Yes, this is definitely going to work out'?" Someone who just lost 3 quarters of a million dollars.

[@drakkenmensch]

Fyre Festival part 2: cryptocoin boogaloo

[@cryptohunter8119]

@@drakkenmensch it was self bought noone has bought anything

[@raeleneosborne7801]

@@cryptohunter8119 yeah, that's my thought. To get the ball rolling on others buying them

[@illdeletethismusic]

this is for people that got lucky on some memecoins if acquiring wealth is a joke, then spending it can be too

[@Llortnerof]

@@illdeletethismusic "A fool and his money are soon parted" As true today as it was for the last few centuries.

[@crunchyfrog555]

I have the distinct good fortune to work for Glastonbury Festival (disabled campsite). Been there almost 20 years now. I can honestly say these people haven't got the first clue how basic infrastructure works or how they are never goign to manage this. That island has no space for sewage storage and management, no area for electrical supply and management, no real place for ACTUAL food (I don't include a 12-year old kids idea of a restaurant in 10K pizzas), never mind water management and supply. Then you needd on site caretaking and staff for both staffing and maintenance. Glastonbury Festival has around 90,000+ punters there. And 26,000 staff. Now google a map of the place. Note how much space that involves for both staff and punters. Now you see the problem?

[@crunchyfrog555]

@@NormandyFoxtrot Well no. They might think that as far as actual products go, but you can't do that for sewage, water, electric and maintenance. They're completely hopeless.

[@scruffybones321]

What's the big deal? They're in the middle of the ocean. Just drink the infinite sea water and dump the sewage into the ocean.

[@Lowaver]

I like how they called it self sufficient. But farming crops would take up so much of the land. Even if they don't farm crops, meat is still a problem. You get one to two missed shipments and there will be a whole lot of problems.

[@crunchyfrog555]

@@Lowaver Yup, I laughed at that too. That was the phrase that piqued my interest. They have zero clue at all when they have drawn up plans and there's no accounting for ANYTHING. God part of me wishes this would happen, and it was allowed to be built as planned and then we could watch the car crash happen.

[@rolfs2165]

You could probably do away with staff if you set it up like a commune and everyone chips in an hour or two of work per day. (Not like that's gonna happen.) But yeah, their island looks like it was designed by someone who only ever looked at commercials of holiday clubs.

[@mvv700]

I said this on Kira's vid, but I'll say it here as well. This is by far the most malicious people behind it you could imagine with their latest 'mental maturity is enough for consent' tweet. We know what can happen with rich people, private islands and minors. I'm for once actually really worried for anything they do to get funded for the safety of others, assuming they are serious with setting up this crap and not pulling the rug and running with investors money..

[@CheesyGabite]

Epstein Island 2

[@solinvictus2018]

This should be a life lesson: Value, in any form, attracts the absolute worst. Crypto set out to be the antithesis to the international banks and the elite, and look at them now; already building their own loli-islands

[@KatastrophicNoodle]

Hey, the whole mental maturity thing could be a slip up, cause they're not english, right? Less "fuck whoever says yes". More "everyone should take an institutionalised test to fuck and have kids". Right? Just hoping for the best here really.

[@user-uo1rn2nb8f]

@@KatastrophicNoodle nah

[@KatastrophicNoodle]

@@user-uo1rn2nb8f TTnTT

[@bosunbill9059]

17:57 Fun fact , Satoshi Nakamoto is a real Japanese engineer and that is what he looks like, however the real Satoshi is a victim of identity theft and is less than happy of getting his face stolen by the "Satoshi" of Bitcoin. So real Satoshi CAN sue Cryptoland for using his face in such as manner as he is not a public figure, and I HOPE he does. Sadly, the poor dude just want some peace in his life and that is perfectly understandable.

[@Dave102693]

What did the guy do to be loved by Cryptobros?

[@bosunbill9059]

@@Dave102693 Cryptobros are Crypto Cultists, and they need something to worship.

[@benjaminmadrigalperez9010]

@@Dave102693 he's is the one that created bitcoin or something.

[@spottyhead]

As a professional animator I just wanna point out that at 14:32 he's holding the workout machine wrong and the human character's arms actually break thru the geometry. The propaganda budget must've been starting to dry up by this point and they just wanted to render everything out and get it on the web next to Spider-Man and Elsa videos Edit: Even the lip sync gets lazy after the 19:00 mark

[@LikaLaruku]

I noticed he lipsync issue too.

[@christianlewis6789]

In other words, not quite Disney-esque quality, right? Or am I getting it wrong myself?

[@LotherLotheris]

And I cannot count how many times that ugly coin just... slides around.

[@spottyhead]

@@christianlewis6789 While I don't expect a commercial to have Disney-level animation it becomes obvious they front-loaded the talent in this video. It just gets worse and worse as it goes and that's not even taking into consideration the bad puns and wordplay they shoveled into their script. It's like Johnny Chimpo from Super Troopers...Afghanistanimation lol

[@spottyhead]

@@LotherLotheris Another thing I noticed is the milkshake glass jumps outta the coin's hand and onto the table as well. Sometimes I hate being trained to notice these things lol

[@kuba4ful]

14:58 This is my favorite part, I love how Callum goes "this can't get worse" literally a split second before Cryptopher starts singing lmao

[@christianlewis6789]

I guarantee two things. One: if this absolute mess gets canceled, it'll be the same level of drama to follow as CoE if not worse. Two: if it doesn't get canceled, it'll genuinely be Fyre Festival plus cryptocurrencies with a literal barge's worth of acid for good measure (there's literally no better comparison that you, Callum, and everyone else could choose). If the latter happens and there isn't at least a news report on it being an absolute joke (I would hope for a whole documentary personally), I will be well and truly awestruck.

[@Freakymonify]

Personally I'm looking forward to the Internet Historian video on this one.

[@kempolar9768]

Well the first part of the cancel happened, the main video got DMCA'd by fucking crazy frog. Of all people I did not see that coming.

[@alexn5743]

Sadly it seems to have died with a whimper rather than with any bang. Although it's starting to look like that first plot investor might actually have been the real head of this scheme.

[@Megaritz]

“Mental maturity should be enough.” Okay, so basically nobody who buys into Cryptoland can qualify.

[@LikaLaruku]

Is it just me, or is the island shaped like a dolphin? That CGI Bitcoin looks something straight out of Food Fight.

[@Saieras]

This must be where the stolen footage went.

[@thebaseandtriflingcreature174]

Holy shit it’s Isle Delphino from Mario Sunshine

[@anonymousgoon4249]

That's what I'm sayin

[@LexVanguard2004]

@@thebaseandtriflingcreature174 Lol that was my first thought as well

[@nman551]

I KNEW I WASNT THE ONLY ONE WHO THOUGHT THAT

[@chrisgaming9567]

You know how, when you're scuba diving, you have to pause for a bit after every meter or two that you ascend or descend? That's how it feels watching the Cryptoland video.

[@Stilran]

"look at the quality of this 3d animation!" At the very start the shirt changes from flowers to bitcoins... so much quality that they couldn't just start the animation with the shirt having bitcoins pattern.

[@timburgess920]

There's an expanded version of the animation. In that the start is different, and it cuts to the guy saying his shirt's bitcoin, causing the change. They didn't bother doing anything about it when they shortened it. I think the expanded is 8 minutes longer and the only difference is 8 minutes of more crypto "jokes".

[@ninyaninjabrifsanovichthes45]

@@timburgess920 Please don't show us, I don't want to see any more of this.

[@YOSSARIAN313]

It really gets worse when you remember these are people who think that selfishness is a virtue and that regulations are always bad. Think of the pollution theyd cause and watch them dump their waste in the ocean and draw industrial amounts of power to feed their crypto rigs. Not to mention that tons of non cryptobro workers who would be trapped on a tiny epstein ancapistan island and will be severely mistreated with no who can really help them

[@notnoodle2196]

Callum himself definitely makes this bearable but this is depressing as hell to see that something like this can get so far.

[@TheAdarkerglow]

Allegedly, there was a streamer who donated 160 Etherium live, and received a thank you for it. Possibly the second half of the purchase of that lot? I don't know, that's just what I heard on a discord. The quality of the models may also be related to the artist of the Seagull frame has gone on twitter requesting that they remove the use of the asset from their video. Yes, it is free to download and use, but the artist doesn't want it used in an ad. They maturely blocked the artist.

[@bappo456]

The amount of logistics required to develop, let alone manage and maintain an entire island resort is probably going way over their heads. It probably won't get past the buying/planning phase as the people running this I assume have the patience of a starving dog when it sees food, once it makes enough money to move to another scam, it probably will.

[@OscarSommerbo]

Not to mention the volatility of cryptocurrencies makes it incredibly hard to keep solvent and pay anyone a salary.

[@MadScientist212]

Yep. Like, have they even considered, just to bring up one thing, power? How is the electricity for this island going to be generated? And that's just one (albeit big) part of the infrastructure that would be needed for something like this to actually function.

[@Delaterius]

And then there's the fact that despite their claim that they've okayed this with the government of Fiji, they probably haven't yet mentioned the fact that all of the life sustaining services on this island Fiji is about to be responsible for will go underfunded or unfunded when the crypto market has a big downswing. Something tells me they're going to have a hard time explaining to an actual government of grownups that cryptocurrencies gain their invincibility from the sheer coolness of being untended buy a government.

[@Llortnerof]

@@FqYIwgsiRW2MaTDc By "some time" you mean "about half a day"? Land generally isn't exactly the most expensive part of something like this...

[@Setixir]

@@FqYIwgsiRW2MaTDc The land is the cheap part of this entire thing. The infrastructure, the staff, the constant need for fresh water and food....

[@Jokoko2828]

The empty, souless eyes on the models are what gets me the most, it's like I can feel them staring into my soul.

[@DemonicAkumi]

The first reaction from Callum during the dancing and singing. Magical.

[@ReD-zc3uu]

Purely Majestic. And even better when Callum decided to run that scene again :D

[@TheLizardKing752]

I love how these guys need a de-sress room while they're on vacation in Fiji

[@perciusmandate]

Something tells me these guys didn't pay for the rights to use that Beach Boys song in the credits. And of course THIS video hasn't been DMCA'ed into oblivion. Just another example of KZbin "protecting small creators".

[@LikaLaruku]

I'm hearing quite a few songs I'm sure they didn't pay for.

[@BKPrice]

The guy who created the seagull asset is already demanding that they stop using it.

[@monobrow538]

Or they claimed it automatically and ignored it cause why would you fight that as creator ( most company just claim and move on only if you appeal then they dmca )

[@kinryuten]

They also didn't get permission for the seagull rig.

[@Lowaver]

I'm honestly surprised Nintendo didn't immediately sue the living shit out of them.

[@Archangelm127]

Nobody's asking the *most* important question: which countries can extradite you from CryptoLand?

[@aimhrialta]

Who has a treaty with Fiji? Even if they own the land, it's not going to be independent, it's still in Fiji's jurisdiction and they'll just send the cops over in a boat to pick them up

[@captiancholera8459]

The big three. Realistically the only thing that would really stop the US, China, and Russia from violating Fijis sovereignty to grab someone off that island is each-other (and logistical constraints for the Russians) but for the US alone I can think of several occasions within my 20 years on this planet where we have violated a countries sovereignty to get to someone. Though unless some super shady shit was going on I doubt any of the said nations would send a task force to Fiji to nab a crypto bro.

[@egoalter1276]

Anyone with an oceangoing ship, and an amphibious trained armed unit to be entirely honest.which means basically every country, including land locked ones, as even they tend to have a merchant marine.

[@MoraFermi]

That "luxurious villa" reminds me of Second Life buildings. Nice view, bed, bath and a game table right in the centre, everything else shoved into corners so that the players can spin their camera around looking for best angles as they try painful looking "adult" poses with one another.

[@poego6045]

I love how 4 seconds after saying "look at the quality of this animation", we see the main character's shirt pattern change from flowers to bitcoins in a glitchy way that can only be a texture error or someone mixing old renders with new.

[@Smaxx]

Not sure it's been mentioned on stream already, but I've heard at least some of the assets used in the video were apparently stolen/used without a commercial license. So here we go…👍

[@eddiea4358]

The musical number they did is a lawsuit waiting to happen

[@CoffeeForAll]

The underlying work for the bird was also used without permission. Which you would still need when you make a commercial project, even when using things that creators made free for people to use.

[@couldntmixapotnoodle]

D'y'ave a licence to use that kinda asset?

[@nateking510]

Serious question. Has there been anything new/innovative utilizing this technology (block chain/nft/cypto) that wasn't possible before? Because all I keep seeing is basically scams or just new platforms for gambling.

[@georgekostaras]

It’s an innovation in how to scam people of their money

[@Llortnerof]

@@georgekostaras More like an innovative way to avoid state oversight of financial transactions. And a good reminder of why that is a thing in the first place.

[@georgekostaras]

@@Llortnerof all the better to defraud people if there’s no accountability

[@simplus1980]

As llortneorf said, crypto-currencies are good to evade government oversight (and protection). So they're useful for the criminal world. NFTs, I still have to see an actual plus-value.

[@nateking510]

People can just pay other each other in cash "under the table" to avoid the government etc. So the only new part is that it is online and remote (not requiring in person meetings)?

[@MudakTheMultiplier]

I bet the one sold plot of sold land is actually just owned by one of the guys in charge.

[@rene2106]

Expect more of these plots being "sold" to create "scarcity".

[@user-uo1rn2nb8f]

Yep either that or it was given to some big crypto influencer to hype up the project

[@mjodr]

That's how the NFT scams start. Wash trading. "OMG this cryptodookie sold for $670k!? I could flip that thing for 1 mil!" NFT creator bought it with one of his 9 other accounts.

[@thebackgroundguy9491]

There's a video of the guy buying it and he outright says he is a friend of the guys behind Cryptoland.

[@Kmwildride]

Well, you called it

[@Dradeeus]

It's funny that everything in the animation, from the characters to the songs, is just a slight derivative of an existing property. That's actually really upfront about them, to say you can expect no creativity and manufactured slight variations, just like their NFT collections. Also upfront that the only women there are employees who are paid to be there.

[@scrufflord6618]

0:48 this explains why chryptopher is so keen to get to the island, given his affinity for "crypto kiddies"

[@mcnultyssobercompanion6372]

I doubt it would have been happy-faced WASP's serving as support staff, it would have surely been dead-eyed, woefully underpaid, distinctly exploited local Fiji-islanders. I don't even want to think about it...

[@Kohlamebi]

The hundreds of staff needed to run this this island, do they need to be cryptobros as well?

[@spottyhead]

No need for a passport...just verify your cryptowallet lol

[@ashanarchy7255]

@@spottyhead no, they will all live in a shed hidden away from view in the trees and payed less than minimum wage.

[@Sharlenwar]

Callum, your reaction is priceless. Thank you for staying away from all information until now about this. More please!

[@TheInternetHelpdeskPlays]

I love how you can see Callum's will to live slowly seep away. This is torture.

[@paddyjoe1884]

Hope he isn't going to need therapy afterwards! I'm actually wondering if showing people this video might be an alternative to waterboarding. But I'm pretty sure that would breach human rights conventions.

[@paddyjoe1884]

Hope he isn't going to need therapy afterwards! You'd wonder if this might be an alternative to waterboarding, showing them this video!

[@thebadshave503]

I like how the characters all talk frantically faster when they're off-camera because that avoids syncing the mouths.

[@atraxian5881]

This sounds like the Dreamworld parallel for crypto bros.

[@BoldTint]

Except there's literally no way for it to get good.

[@zecnobot]

Dreamworld probably taking notes.

[@FreeJazzEnthusiast]

I felt my soul leave my body during the 3D animated segment. I’m not sure how a bunch of adult human beings are somehow this insanely embarrassing. Like they made this and thought that it’s cool. I could barely make it through while watching someone else watch it. I wanted to get up and make food as a distraction, just so I didn’t have to watch it.

[@basil4825]

This “show” looks like one of those kid shows from the 90’s that you would see lost media youtubers talking about

[@sarrakitty]

That's practically an insult to 90's computer animation!

[@arnaskelpsa5207]

I totally agree

[@BoldTint]

It looks like one of those shitty safety cartoons that would teach you to pee on a rag and put it on your face if you're in a middle of a forest fire or something.

[@kinryuten]

Someone call Saberspark!

[@Dave102693]

Late 90s to early 00s anime/super sentai cgi

[@Jabrils]

One bad hurricane & that investment isn't going to the moon, its going to the Mariana Trench. 🥴

[@warpingrealities]

Rapture is a lot lamer than I would have expected, but I'm looking forward to the gene splicing and face eating on Crypto Land.

[@eddiedacunha3755]

did anybody else notice that the guy's shirt changes completely within the first few frames while he's still in the plane 4:45

[@deanmottershead9208]

The island is pretty small isn't it? Like you could walk around in in a afternoon? Tropical storms will blow away pretty much every structure every year. They had best hope there isn't any engaged species on or around it otherwise most they will be able to build will be a shack

[@dahobdahob]

No idea how I wandered into this video, but I immediately wondered where the power generation and sewage processing would occur on that tiny island

[@Smogne]

@@dahobdahob Me too; also, what about the country that Island belongs to? It's laws about private land ownership, citizenship and so on.

[@bappo456]

@@dahobdahob Yeah that and other logistics like medical care and building permits.

[@DeCMKYT]

@@dahobdahob also the money they would have to spend to get internet to that island.

[@deanmottershead9208]

@@bappo456 that’s a good point nearest hospital is probably 100s if not 1000s of miles away

[@zh84]

This can be summed up in an old adage: "A fool and his money are soon parted."

[@fealubryne]

This video makes me feel some weird combination of confusion, sadness, rage, and existential horror all at the same time. With a little bit of nausea thrown in for good measure.

[@xantishayde-walker4593]

Yeah, that crazy cocktail of emotions pretty much sums up my experience about perfectly. That with a heavy dose of "WTF?!?!?!" added in for good measure.

[@mikoto7693]

I’m really confused. I don’t get it, do they have a real island or is it like second life?

[@MadScientist212]

I tried watching this myself and it was too painful to get through. Thank you for this vid, watching it with the pauses and hearing your reactions actually made it bearable. Somewhat.

[@raeleneosborne7801]

and also allowed us to watch it without giving view counts to them

[@nman551]

I made it through somehow

[@spottyhead]

Remember, they used to test nuclear bombs in Tahiti...maybe this is some ploy to get the worst of the worst of the CryptoBros to Epstien Isle v2.0 and then test out the next WMD

[@captc0ck5lap60]

In Dante's Inferno, you as the titular character are walked through Tartarus. A hell of multiple levels, each worse than the last. Each uniquely catering to the sins of the denizens that are sent there. At the last level, the condemned souls are described as being frozen in ice up to their necks. A frigid, demonic blizzard blows across them at all times, the source of which is lucifer himself, trapped up to the waist, beating his wings in an effort to free himself. But now, we've uncovered a deeper hell. A more hideous level of Tartarus. Break through that ice, and you'll find yourself trapped on an island with moonboi crypto bros. Hearing nothing but neckbeard garbage and out of date, spine cringing memes. *Forever.*

[@mpldr_]

"Why does it need to exist?" - Callum Upton The answer is simple: so you may suffer for our entertainment.

[@jessaminehaak8253]

One thing that really gets me that I'm surprised no one else has mentioned is that the ending implies that none of the rest of the video happened and Christopher imagined it all when Connie showed him the plans. Which means that embarrassing incel crap with the girl wasn't even just. that he Happened to meet a girl with such bad taste that she already thinks Cryptoland is a good idea so it's conceivable she might possibly be interested in this guy... it means he IMAGINED that. That awkward fumbling about forks is his Fantasy of a good way to start a conversation with a girl......

[@piffling2238]

I suddenly relate to Scott Lang (ant0man) when I ask "Do you guys just put crypto in front of everything?"

[@MidnightSt]

22:30 The glorious moment when Callum coincidentally voice-acts the bird's appropriate response XD

[@xellios]

Fun Fact: After KiraTV's video on it there was a flood of comments calling it a cringefest and they disabled comments on their video and they are now claiming they are under attack and being harassed. Crazy Shit.

[@nman551]

We did it boys we made them seethe

[@DoomTrooper90]

Anyone who can watch that video without cringing has seen some serious shit and is no one to be screwed with. God damn.

[@smackeddie3826]

Reporting for duty. 😂

[@Codexane]

The island seems to be Nananu-i-Cake Island in Fiji. Still showing for sale right now, but hey why would you need to own it to sell real-estate there, crypto bros will buy anything

[@BonJoviBeatlesLedZep]

"oh ETH's taken a tumble" 😭 That one line kinda exposes how awful this entire crypto endeavour is. It's like they've taken everything wrong with real money and amplified it x1000.

[@lorgarmor5886]

"They understood how powerful a physical representation of the metaverse would be!" (??) So you use reality to represent virtuality which represents reality in the first place? Sometimes I wonder if they even think about the semantics of the sentences they are saying... Oh yeah, and buying the island is still part of the roadmap... And where is the whole infrastructure needed to support a small town on an island? The main question I have is: Since they cannot sell parcels yet they sell these King NFTs...but is there any obligation to provide what they somewhat promise here? Can they just cancel the island purchase and say "Hey, but you got a King NFT"?

[@tungstenwall474]

CryptoLand CEO: *Wringing hands* "Imagine all the Jaw Breakers, Double-D!"

[@d3viousone470]

Is this where the earth2 investors are going to spend their imaginary profit. Because if this turns into a real place and don't go up in a cloud of smoke I will eat my own crap. No one can seriously be thinking about ploughing money into this unless they have more money than sense or just utterly insane.

[@ShawnMCowles]

Someone in Earth 2 should buy the tiles on the island.

[@redohealer2]

"One good natural disaster will take them out in one quick action" god damn

[@AZodiacCancer]

The love interest whose wallet got stolen doesn't even have hair physics.

[@timburgess920]

The love interest isn't even real within the narrative. The last bit with paper suggests Connie is pitching cryptoland to whatever his name was. A pitch that apparently contains "And then you meet a hot girl and save her from seagulls."

[@thebadshave503]

Imagine being trapped on this island for any reason (plane delays, loss of access to your crypto, bad weather). You're now stuck on this tiny spit of land with seemingly no real designs for shelter except the private villas of the hyper-wealthy you best hope you're a part of. There's no apparent stores save a single cafeteria, the only non-villa structures are for recreation or business. There's an odd emphasis on having a singular bathroom structure...

[@pagannova3621]

i see why people call this stuff a cult. there's some technologicaly usage in NFT and crypto, but this ain't it chief.

[@PokeMaster22222]

I like how at 4:40 in this video, the yellow shirt goes from having red flowers to a completely different pattern at 4:48. So much for a 'polished' animation.

[@vacuousbard6410]

So this is the next Bioshock's setting?

[@Saieras]

I'd play it.

[@nman551]

Andrew Ryan Is excited

[@Shskdndnxkdnd]

This Somehow turned from a Parody Spinoff to a Horror episode real quick. Can't take it seriously, can't take it hilariously.

[@candrian7]

In 10 years the denizens of Cryptoisland are going to be Bioshock splicers.

[@dappercrow1454]

that's an insult to the people of Rapture. they took over a decade before they started to kill each other. these crypto bros will start slicing each others faces within the fist six mouths.

[@maravreloaded]

8:55 Remember the Crypto Party that ended with people with several eye damage for highly bright lights?

[@siristhedragon]

The real, cunning thing about scams like this is that the thing itself isn't the actual scam; the real marks are the guys who think that they can "get in on the scam" by getting in early. This video exists as an advertisement to those who would invest in a scam, the actual message being "look at this bullshit we're peddling, think of all the money you could make by scamming the kind of idiot who'd fall for this. All you need to do is front some crypto and you'll be all set for pay-day!" And then once there's enough crypto tied up in it, the guy who started this cashes out and runs, leaving everyone else hanging, and potentially even shirking all liability onto them.

[@Winasaurus]

Classic bigger fool scam. Except instead of "This is going to be worth a lot, you should buy now" it's just 1 layer up to "This idiot thinks it's going to be worth a lot, buy now." Can't wait when people start catching on and they just go 1 more layer up and target people who can tell it's trying to scam the early investors and think they can beat it by investing ultra-early pre-launch.

[@jamesofhoenn4790]

Everyone talks about the lack of infrastructure plans, but let’s also remember that islands like these are prime for storms. One hurricane or typhoon and everything is gone

[@emiledlund9559]

I know cryptobros like their coins. But is it really at a close friendship level?

[@platong451]

Well, it's on imaginary land, they don't own the island yet, it's like their second home.

[@platong451]

After all, they are all about that virtual vibe, they want to have real life, but on a computer screen.

[@Saieras]

Oh, I think it's something more 😏

[@nikolajlorentzen9995]

"Hold up, we need to see that bit again"....NOOOOO!!

[@Auriorium]

I don't have enough liquor in me for this.

[@irishbob26]

I wouldn't normally make 2 comments on a video but jesus christ my brain just melted out my ears.

[@ryanhollist3950]

I almost feel like they are trying to make some Ayn Rand dram come to life, while not realizing what a horrifying nightmare it will turn into.

[@Rogue2316]

I’ve always wanted to see Bioshock in real life. With some luck, we can look forward to magic lightning powers and yuppies beating each other to death with wrenches.

[@hayato1886]

@@Rogue2316 Also maybe someone turning other people into "art"

[@ja-vishaara]

Imagine someone steals your nft so now you can't prove you own the parcel anymore so you get evicted

[@WoolfJ35]

Saw this on Kira's and even before he showed the Twitter post about the age of consent I had that gut feeling that it was going to be a Epstein island situation, the FBI should just start prepping for their case already.

[@brianmanning5351]

Watching this, I can only assume we died in 2020 and live in actual hell now.