D&D Players, What was your "HOW THE HELLAM I STILL ALIVE!?"

[@adrianbrown3085]

Artificer to the paladin: "When I said I wanted you inside me, this isn't what I had in mind..."

[@digitalhomic8155]

Pffft

[@digitalhomic8155]

Were they attempting to flirt?

[@omegawolfbrony]

I was playing an Eldritch-Knight, snow-leopard Tabaxi, Caiatl. I played Caiatl like she was an impulsive cat. The party had come back to the town after wrecking an Inn/hotspring bath, evil plants had made the ground unstable anyway. We needed to gather supplies, silver some weapons, all that good stuff. Caiatl needed a component pouch because I had forgotten to give her one during character creation. I was talking to a merchant and he said he needed some plants and fungi to finish the pouch. The moment she got the list, Caiatl rushed off into the woods. At night. While out of spell slots. The best she had was a magic-fuel powered weed whacker and a wooden mask that made her eyes glow an eerie blue-green (this mask effect is the only one that is relevant). She proceeded to get just about everything and more and was ready to head back. The sound of two children screaming caught her attention and she saw two kids running from a flight-capable Owl Bear. I and everyone else knew I couldn't take on the Owl Bear. But I knew Caiatl wouldn't just leave the kids to their fate. So I rushed out into the path of the monster and proceeded to intimidate the crap out of it. Revving the weed whacker, yowling like snow-leopards do (think woman actively being unalived and you'll have the sound) and my eyes flaring with that glow. Two or three intimidation checks later and it flew off. The kids ran away from me too, but that was okay, they were safe. All the players and DM laughed and told me that they thought I was dead. Tales of a new cryptid had already spread when I got back to town, that of the Yowling Shredder, the Protector of Children. Edit: Finished the story, KZbin saved the comment before I was done. Grammer corrections.

[@DeltaSpark8]

My Level 2 Circle of Stars Druid had his Guiding Bolt misfire on him after 3 NATURAL ONES IN A ROW. The first prompted me to use inspiration to re-roll as per our house rules, and the third was to determine which of my allies I would accidentally hit. I dealt 17 damage to myself, leaving me with only 2 after one of the Kuo-Toa we were fighting had gotten a hit on me near the start of the fight. I lived only because our Paladin did a fantastic job of drawing most of the enemies to herself. The GM told me one of my hands would be permanently scarred from the incident, and I would later work it into the story by having my character examine his star map sometime later, only to discover the stars of where the campaign is taking place are different from the ones the party knew from Faerun.

[@Anfoeus811]

Barbarian lizard folk, 13 level (me) tackles boss off of a pillar, planning on taking him down with me since he killed me character’s best friend, a companion we lost the previous session. We were 120 feet over solid ground. I fully expected to die, but that one perk where if my health drops to 0 without outright killing me, I can roll (DC 10, then increasing by 5 each additional time) to see if I go back up to half health. I did. Boss took damage, but also survived. He proceeded to stab me, and once again I rolled (DC 15 now) and again I survived. Boss fled, and party member killed him with the melt metal spell, as the boss had a sword partially impaled in him.

[@GT-wj3gl]

Wow that's intense!

[@Ancient_Of_Rites]

Forge cleric sat there and ate 10 consecutive shots of cannon fire from an entire platoon of ships while walking on water, because he called their god-king a “whingy, spindly, fish-fucker.” Only one actually got through his AC due to shit DM rolls, and barely chipped his hp due to even shittier DM rolls. The image of a 3’7 man with a density similar to tungsten sprinting across the water directly at their ironclad warship caused several crewman to literally piss themselves and scatter, and that was before the homebrew magnet boots let him sprint straight up the side to get in melee range. I can’t even blame them, I’d have pissed myself too

[@CrazyHawkeComics]

The only one I can think of is from my group's first ever session. We were hired by a druid village to clear out a hive of waspfolk (DM's homebrew race) by sneaking in and taking out the wasp general. Our fighter and cleric managed to sneak in flawlessly while our monk, who was heavily inspired by Dragon Ball Z, waited outside to blast the hive away when the job was done. Then comes my turn to sneak in... a large, heavy, red dragonborn barbarian (you can probably see where this is going). I rolled a 3 on my stealth check and proceeded to trip over every piece of furniture in the room AND bump right into a guard! I was low on health and had no one nearby who could help if things went sideways. So I, in my panicked state of mind, did the only thing that could MAYBE save me... I flirted with the guard and rolled an 18 baby! Everyone at the table couldn't believe it actually worked! It took us an hour to stop laughing before we continued, and ever since then my beefy dragonborn powerhouse has been going on adventures with his new half-bee half-human girlfriend, Beetrice! Oh, and as for the original mission? I ended up ripping out the wasp general's stinger and speared him with it, still have it in my inventory as of writing this!

[@Dualbladedscorpion7737]

I can see your dragon born character founding a whole dragon wasp kingdom with his girlfriend.

[@CrazyHawkeComics]

@@Dualbladedscorpion7737 I've actually been trying to make that happen, but I may have to kill Tiamat before I can

[@hyper_sword8835]

I was playing an adventure league game as a level 12 wizard aside the rest of the party of level 16 characters. We got into a fight with several High power aberrations that had taken a npc we needed. At the start of the fight cast wall of force along the side of the room to make a safe tunnel we could retrieve the npc. Eventually the enemy took notice of this and came barreling down towards me, and over the course of several turns I went from above 130 hp (arcane ward and high con) to 8 hp at the end of the fight. I was the most hurt member of the party but through it all the wall of force never fell preventing a bad situation from being even worse.

[@jaxonmcdonald3996]

Customary Algorithm Support and “29 views in three minutes? Crazy Rates”

[@Godzillawolf1]

So, homebrew campaign, our party are exploring an ancient vault, just barely survived a fight with a pair of Dragonblood Oozes and probably should've turned back, but we were like 'hey, let's have the Ranger stealth ahead and see if we need to turn back or not.' Well, we though to keep our eye out for not alerting enemies...not for traps. One gets triggered, we manage to avoid a crushing ceiling trap...only to find a freaking Young Black Dragon rode the ceiling down. Well, we attempt to sneak out...and of course me being a 9 foot tall, half-dragon (reflavored Dragonborn) in heavy armor, we get caught. So here we are, multiple party members, myself included, nearly dead. Sorcerer is at one HP, and a Young Black Dragon would be a reasonably challenging boss at our level if we were at full health. So I decide to leverage the fact my Paladin, Drei, has an infamous Adult Green Dragon mother and that Green Dragons genuinely care for their offspring to talk our way out of the situation which would've most likely been a TPK...and rolled terribly. Cue the Druid, Wild Shaped into a mouse to avoid being crushed under the closing roof, jumping on my head to give me the help action by hyping me up. DM allows it and we spend the rest of the session making a deal with this Black Dragon to go get Drei's mom's help in freeing him in exchange for his assistance dealing with the entire freaking kingdom we've made an enemy of (long story). Somehow it worked and we got out of that whole mess alive and not melted into a puddle of flesh goo. Unfortunately, we've now got a sizable side quest to go talk to Drei's mother about this on the other side of the kingdom, but hey, we're at least not dead.

[@djmagichat1721]

Back in the days of 4th edition, I was still in college and a friend wanted to run the 4th ed Tomb of Horrors campaign. I joined in for laughs, mainly. Fast forward to the third leg of the campaign. The "boss" for that segment was a massive arcane engine of sorts, shaped like a chandelier and hung like a chandelier from the ceiling of a tall chamber, about 90 feet up IIRC. A couple of us got up on top of the chandelier to start shattering the stones keeping it powered. I, like always, was playing a wizard, and thus when I saw someone else going for the finishing blow I magicked my way back to the floor below with no fall damage. But see, our DM had stated that with two of the three power sources destroyed, the chandelier had started rocking in all directions as it destabilized. So when it was finally shut down and he said that the chandelier fell straight down, several people spoke up. After all, most of us were studying computer science or some form of engineering; it made sense that the wobble would have sent it careening in some random direction. I actually felt like I argued for it the hardest. Our DM finally capitulates, and rolls a d8 to determine which way it's gonna go. *It landed on top of my wizard.* I'm staring down at our drawn out map and the dice, just stunned, while the other players are falling out of their seats laughing and our DM is fighting not to do the same. He even started to apologize, but I stopped him. After all, I had argued quite hard for this to be what happened. If this is how it goes, I might as well take it in stride and hope for the best...because OF COURSE IT WOULD WORK OUT THIS WAY. DM rolls his dice and gives me a number. At this point, we were a high enough level that even as a wizard I had around 110 HP. 93 damage. I looked at our DM and said, "I crawl out of the rubble and immediately do this!" and proceeded to throw up double V's like Nixon, but wide-eyed and half-crazed from adrenaline. 10/good, would make the same mistakes again somehow, I think.

[@SaxtonGaming1401]

In the Lost Mines of Phandelver module my party is playing, I have gone to critical HP three times. Once in a homebrew gladiator arena, twice in a homebrew false hydra dungeon. In all those situations, even the simplest hits would've killed me. Why didn't I go down? Hill Dwarf Barbarian, enough said.

[@pulsefel9210]

1:40 ok that deserves some "see the light" one liner from you as your friend sends it down

[@magoichi75]

I got one, My life domaine cleric was put into a catapult and was gonna be launched onto a pirate ship as our paladin was getting onboard to start a sort of sneak attack. The Sorcerer launched me but due to not having any knowledge of operating it my cleric was sent out into the ocean. 1 HP and a dream I managed to swim back to not only heal the team that got wiped on the docks but roll onto the ship and assist the paladin that was tanking the entire group

[@AlphaVT20]

Thank you so much Mr. Ripper for featuring Farren again. And for everyone that wants to know how Farren is doing, he is very much alive and well. He managed to remove the Eye and Hand thanks to the Deck of Many Things. Heck, I'm probably gonna have to write up an entire essay about Farren sooner or later. No doubt one of my favorite characters to have ever created. ^_^

[@skeepodoop5197]

Couldn't tell you how many 50/50 odds I've survived. There's been at least 2 times I was on my last death save and got lucky, and another time I broke a staff of power to kill an ancient red dragon, and won the coin flip. With how much damage I would've dealt to myself, I would have instantly died if I lost the 50/50 odds to get teleported to a diffrent plane.

[@alexanderkane7586]

I once played a Human(base Human for 5e, not Variant Human or 5.5e's Human race) Fighter, Orel "Ore" Marsk, who was still Lv. 1 when he fell from something close to 80ft. while ensuring a Dwarven Monk made it all the way to the top of the cliff they were climbing and securing a climbing rope along the way. All of us playing in that session(for a Westmarch server during 5e, btw.) thought Orel Marsk was dead, but I asked the DM to roll the fall damage anyway just in case. The result was that Orel Marsk took a grand total of 23 points of damage from the fall, just barely not enough to one-shot him from the drop. Thankfully, the rest of the party was still at the base of the cliff and swiftly got Orel back onto his feet and he ended up trying the climb again a short while later, making it all the way up this time without falling again. The moment was so impressive to me that I have recounted this moment many times across places with people interested in D&D. Additionally, I continued to play Orel Marsk and made it to Lv. 5, nearly Lv. 6 before Orel Marsk's luck finally ran out.

[@littlemilk2]

Early campaign playing as a cleric/monk. 2 failed death saves down and i roll a 4 on my final one. Ruling that a death save counts as a saving throw we flavoured the bard's bardic inspiration as hearing the angelic music of my deity. I rolled a 6 to keep me alive for one more turn, just enough to be healed. That cemented my character's faith for the rest of the campaign.

[@JustinVanTrump]

The party had someone leave after only a couple sessions, so the three of us remaining ended up watching a fight in a gladiatorial arena and the rogue and I (I am playing a Mountain Dwarf Fighter) got into an argument, and as a prank the rogue lifted me up by my arm and volunteering me as the next opponent of the winner (who by the way was undefeated and we were only level 1), well the entire party had to fight and since I had the highest AC I stayed in melee range and attacked as often as possible with my greataxe, while the rogue and sorcerer pelted the gladiator (who turned out to be a barbarian by the way) with ranged attacks, I got knocked down just to get healed, just to then deal the most damage to them in a single round of combat, which made me their target until we finally won and spared their life which made them want to join our party as a life debt

[@ray-raypacheco276]

I was on a trip to Portland one time, waiting for the Metro, when i see a guy walking up the street yelling, kicking things, and holding a machete. I stopped him and asked him about how he was doig and managed to calm him down and get his story, (drug issues, untreated mental disorders, and he had nearly gotten kidnapped the night before which is why he had the machete). My bus came and i was willing to wait for the next one to talk with him a bit more, when he threw himself onto the front of the bus to stop it and at that point i thanked him and got on, wishing him well. Once on the bus i realized that i saw a crazy dude swinging a machete and my first thought was, "I need to check this out, in case i need to take that away from him."

[@GabbyJFS_02]

Two weeks ago, in my first ever combat encounter for DnD. My first campaign happens to be Tomb of Annihilation (yes, I know, I will die horribly many times), and the DM had me roll on what I assume was a random encounter table. We got 3 sea hags as 5 level 3 players (one fighter, one barbarian, and three druids, although the barbarian didn't show up so DM just rolled for him). I went down almost immediately due to death glare, then again to a 5th level lightning bolt. He did another one of those right after. It took damn near the entire session to kill those things, and by the end of it the druids were almost completely out of spell slots and we were all at single-digit Hp. Absolutely insane, still don't know how we survived that. Lots of fun though.

[@benjaminfinlay829]

I had a 4e campaign in Dark Sun that had a handful of "How are we still alive" moments, as the DM sometimes overestimated the party. I don't remember all of them, but... The best one (specifically for my character, a Dray Assault Swordmage named Marxon) involved the DM's overestimations directly; we had an encounter with Abalach Re herself. We were only just entering Paragon tier, though, so the DM ended up having to pull a Deus Ex Machina to avoid a TPK. Or rather... a _Diabolus_ Ex Machina. Because Abalach Rey _exploded._ Literally. Which brought down a landslide that chased the party down a mountain. The others managed to find a log to ride if I'm remembering right. Marxon, on the other hand... I had a crazy idea, and ended up succeeding at an Arcana check to turn to allow Marxon to turn his Warding (a Swordmage feature that's sort of a shield made of solidified magic) into a sandboard. It was a crazy moment all around.

[@ronnymegamilk7828]

I had 2 instances. The first one was when my party went to recover a mine for some dwarves that was taken over by Fire newts (We're playing Tomb of Annihilation). I was leading when I thought we had the perfect distraction to catch the ones we had on sight off guard, oh boy I was wrong. There were a little more Fire newts than I initially saw..... we ended up fighting around 30 different creatures, Giant striders, fire newts, sorcerers. It was absolute carnage, the battle took around 2 and a half hours of us struggling against the absolute HORDE of enemies. But we lived to tell the tale, DM was so absolutely sure we would die right there. That day we leveled up 2 times in one fight as a reward, thank you DM. I don't even know how I managed to do it. The second one is on the same setting and this time our Paladin single handedly smite the fuck out of Baggy Nana, my curious character wanted to see what was below the bag on top of her head, and man was that a "Unfortunately, my character WOULD do this" moment. I got sucked into the bag whole and ended up in a place that felt like I was underwater, with absolute darkness surrounding me, but I wasn't alone, I got attacked by multiple creatures, you can imagine my panic as I love my character as if she was my daughter. My party members panicked and got a really high Arcana check to see what was going on, they managed to tear a hole in the bag so I could see the light and get out, a couple of misses from the mysterious entities inside the bag and a feline agility later, I managed to get out, also my DM was thrilled when this happened, you psycho jerk.

[@spartanhawk7637]

Bit of a long story, but I'm still proud of this feat ten years later. Wasn't D&D, this was Dark Heresy, a Warhammer 40k tabletop setting where you play as members of the Inquisition. My character was an Arbites judge (think Judge Dredd for those unfamiliar with the setting,) freshly promoted after his commanding officer got killed by rioting chaos cultists. The whole planet at this point was tearing itself apart in a massive civil war, and I found myself separated from the party, alone with a single squad of lower ranking Arbites, trying to fight my way across the planet to the capitol building from the fallen Arbites precinct. It was an almost 20 mile hike through rampaging lunatics, monsters, cultists, and aliens. This was ABSOLUTELY a death sentence from a DM that wanted me to leave the table and was being passive aggressive about it. I realized then and there that we were doing theater of the mind, and decided to use it to my advantage. Pulling knowledge I had of the street the precinct was on, (we had passed it in a previous session when I was playing my previous character. He got killed by cannibals, fun times,) I led my squad of NPCs through a sewage pipe and went under the rioters. Once the pipe started to move a direction we didn't need to go, we had already covered about two miles. We climbed out and were met face to face with a large contingent of guardsmen who had defected to Chaos. I took a moment to ask my DM what they were equipped with, and he responded, quote, "standard issue Guardsmen attire and weaponry." Now here's where the fun begins. I had played a Guardsman before in the campaign and I knew what their equipment is. Lasguns. No tricks, no additions, just plain old laser rifles. I then revealed to the DM that Arbites riot shields are SPECIFICALLY resistant to lasgun fire and provide full cover when stationary. To his credit, the DM was actually reasonable and fair when it came to combat, and I had declared that I had equipped my men for a riot before leaving. My Arbites wound up forming a shield wall and we just whittled down this force, outgunned about five to one, but due to the damage resistance, we actually survived unscathed and forced the Guardsmen to retreat while abandoning their vehicles. We wound up stealing them and drove them the rest of the way to the capitol. My character didn't lose a single man that entire game in a setting notorious for being a meat grinder.

[@umbreonjmj5647]

Just got back from a school dnd campaign and this happened, my first ever character who i am very proud of... the group was fighting a group of "fart elementals" i was already at 2hp, and i went to hit the last one, when i rolled a NAT1... i then proceeded to fail my constitution save, (the leftover fart from the mist shaper ended up in my face), then failed a death save with a 2... and luckily the dm took pity on me😂, so he made the others roll to heal me... the members got a nat1, a nat 1, and a nat 20(in that order)... healing 1hp... my heart is still racing, and i have no idea how i survived that... it was the FIRST BATTLE of the campaign, meant to teach the player new to dnd(ME) how to fight...😅

[@veardinflarin2852]

Paladin and Artificer actually get to together. Artificer: Hey, wanna rearrange my guts again? ;)

[@Azriclu]

Light armor fighter barbarian, with a new adventure league table. Wore chains that my party could hit with heat metal. Jumped down a red dragons throat....frickin Druid cast heat metal and ran with the party. Can't believe I survived that Druid ancient red dragon team up

[@6ftTiny216]

Our party is investigating a haunted manor within an haunted city, and get trapped inside by a haunting presence. After some puzzling and avoiding animated statues, we get to the main chambers and enter a confrontation with an apparition-amalgam of someone -or-other from said haunted family. This things gains an extra attack a round and curses us not to be able to heal, as well as instilling madness effects on us, both semi-permanently (i. e. Untill we leave the manor). We come out hanging on by a thread, and solve the rest of the overarching puzzle for the mannor. THEN it turns out the thing we fought wasn't the ACTUAL final encounter. Cue the courtyard fountain exploding and a damn horrible beastie coming out. We are a big party (8-ish characters) and we are split between the ground and second floor. Druid runs away. Nearly downed paladin gets insta-splatted by the massive damage rule. DM, creative as they were, was perpetually spitroasting us, giving us 1 level every IRL year (so we are, like, lvl 5) and insisted on homebrewing encounters... and wasn't too great at it when balance was concerned. Turns out that thing had an attack that could deal 5d8, among others. It then LEAPS up to the second floor, making a giant hole in the wall, but, luckily, missing it's initial attacks. In a concerted effort, our monk duo - my lizardfolk and our genassi (who by this point, despite their TERRIBLE STR scores, have become a two-man wrecking crew, and have consitently been rolling ridiculously well on any check that involved pushing or breaking down something) - pull another classic combo and shove the nasty back down where it came from. By group calculations, that was about 4-5d6 bludgeoning damage. Running the math, my character (who wasn't faring much better than our now flattened pally) decides to lead a suicide charge, and is the first to fling himself off of the rather high second floor, falling on top of the creature right below, and dealing more damage that way than he ever would have had the chance to in regular combat. This, of course, immediately made him fall unconcious, even with rediced fall damaged. Then, most gloriously, 6 or 7 other characters scream their war cry and follow suit, plummeting like a pack of rabid lemmings. Within a round, my companions crush the vile thing under their mighty weight, at the cost of most of them now standing on death's door. Nearly finished, the beast was slain by the sole person, who managed to stay concious, ending the encounter in spectacular fashion.

[@cynthokami]

My tiefling rogue decided to shoot an arrow into the ceiling of a dungeon and climb it so they can look around and spot any traps. Once they reached the top of the rope, they were hit with 4 Power Word: Kill spells-one from each direction. They met Death and the only reason they lived is because Death took one look at them and said, "It's not your time yet." and sent them back. (This character has almost died several times but this was definitely my "how the hell are they still alive?" moment lol, and still one of my favorite memories to this day)

[@Synfang]

In the first campaign I played in, during one battle, we had some form of grenade, dynamite, etc. thrown at us by a goblin (think something like the smokepowder bomb throwables from BG3). Thaddeus, our neutral evil plasmoid Oath of Treachery paladin, does the most good and most out of character thing he ever did in the whole campaign, and basically swallowed the grenade, tanking the entirety of the explosion from inside for us. How he didn't drop to 0 HP if not dying outright, especially being only lvl 3 or lvl 4, I will never know.

[@BuffaloBaymax2187]

My ranger has the habbit of dumping all remaining spell slots on Goodberry. I was fighting an NPC that i was supposed to lose to, but the DM made the mistake of letting me eat a fistfull of goodberries (had to roll for the number and roled the max I had on hand). It healed me to full and I ended up winning the fight that I was supposed to lose. DM made me roll for constipation because you are not supposed to eat 40 goodberry at once (i was constipated for 3 in game days)

[@nabra97]

I mean, she did die at the end, but I managed to succeed a bunch of rolls with dice pool 2 to 3 in a Year Zero game. I played as a "team brains" in a spy thriller that devolved into a complete chaos, and she ended up engaged in a brawl, which she won, which was one of the things that won us enough time to finish our mission. We died in the end though

[@manegirl93416]

Out of the Abyss. We rolled at the start to see how long we were in the Drow prison individually. My poor Halfling Bard had been in there, isolated, for a *month* before the majority of the party was tossed in his cell! *HOW IS HE STILL ALIVE?! LET ALONE SANE?!*

[@adromea5628]

Ok so I was playing an artificer in a spelljammer game. We were inciting a revolution on an island as you do and part of that involved a fight in a burning building. I go 'hey you know what would be really funny?' and cast enlarge on the plasmoid moon druid/barbarian who was in their bear form and hulking the hell out. I didn't have enough movement left to then get out of the building as they shot up through the ceiling, and fail the dex save to avoid being crushed under burning rubble. So I was just kinda sitting there, pinned down by rubble and slowly taking fire damage, eventually manage to free myself, walk outside the building and immediately get downed by an arrow 2 or so sessions later, this character got rammed into by an entire spelljamming ship and managed to survive that too somehow Unfortunately the campaign fizzled out a few sessions later but it's still fun to think of the crazy shit that happened

[@SPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED]

a 1v3 against the rest of my team at level 3 as an assasin rouge shadar kai. The party was a paladin, barbarian and ranger

[@billbishop6109]

I was a level 14 half orc barbarian holding the line of waves of undead coming down the tunnel inside the dracolich Ebondeath's lair. We had already defeated the dragon, but were concerned about the lich part so we went to check out its lair. We found its spirit, which took over our bard (who was the primary healer). So the rest of the party was trying to save the bard while I was tanking all the undead. Eventually they had reduced me to 0 hp, and my relentless rage kicked in, needing to roll a DC 10 con save to stay up, no problem. Next hit, DC 15, made it by 5 so no issue. Next round I get hit again, DC 20 con save, rolling an 18 with a +10 modifier, so no sweat, still no healing incoming. Then I get hit again, DC 25, I needed a 15 or better and roll a 16. Finally the druid was able to get away and throw a high level healing word my way. They managed to save the bard and helped me mop up the rest of the undead. Never dropped.

[@Lenorewolf312]

You were Him

[@downdogy9099]

Cyber punk 2020 RPG, while in a death maze gameshow in the combat zone took a head shot that ricocheted off and was tackled and shot point blank also in the head, not penetrating my armor, no clue how i survived

[@DarkBlackGod14]

Played a oneshot in the Mutants system recently. My character is a homebrew scout, who has intimidation due to his backstory, but the joke and gimmick of that is the fact that he has scout stat as 1. So yeah, he can do scouting, but he is basically the shittiest option there are. So that character focuses more on the social encounters and combat, where he truly shows how he is hated by the dice gods. The way this mutants system works, is basically, there are no levels. You can become stronger, but it goes with a price. This game has a very limiter resources, and, outside of that - if your skill rises, there are more chances you succeed in anything - but there is a catch. If you dont succeed, you can go for a risk roll. And those can make you succeed instead, but can also cause damage or other drawback for your character. The more skilled you are - the more chances yore succeed on a basic roll, or a risk one, but the more chances there are that the risk roll will just destroy you. To a point there even a character with max health stat could oneshot himself with his own risk roll. So... yeah. I wasnt lucky on my normal rolls. I could pretty much always hit, but never do enogh damage, or something like that. Whtever il take on to do - il will succeed, but not enogh. It was going like that for a whole 8 hour session. The only thing i somehow was good at - is frightening stuff. Whitch is funny, as i only had con of 2, and intimidate of 2(giving me 4 dice to roll, and i succeeded on that more than i did on shooting for whitch i rolled 9 dice). So, with introduction aside, to the story. Were at the water purification facility, with a job to claim it for our village. It turns out the place has a lot of mutants - a slime, whitch is also a bunch of 3m flesh eating worms, mashed together, whitch is worshipped as a god by a local tribe of ghouls. And 2 gigantic burds, worshipped as guardians by the same tribe. So, we fight off a recon from the tribe, getting to that facility, and then birds came back. We fight them, and, somehow we defeat them. We burn their corpses so we can eat them and get to meet our factions recon team in one of the building. Que the social gameplay - and BANG. Now we have around 50 ghouls at our door, with a boss ghoul. Just for you to understand how much is it - with a decent roll, a single ghoul can down 3 of 4 members from our party with a single hit, if we were at perfect state. And we were not. We fought 10 of those at the start of the adventure, and barely made it alive, killing half and sacring second half off. And that fight ghouls were geared way worse and had no preparation, it was basically an ambush. Now were ambushed by a squad 5 times bigger, with better weapons, and a boss. Boss thankfully can speak common, so i decide to try and win it socially, as we literally have 0 chances in a fight even with a perfect rolls. I came out and he demands we leave all our weapons, a single member of us to sacrifice and we may leave. Now normally, you have to either fight them off, or barricade into the control room for that one. But i have an intimidation. Que the dialogue. Ghoul: We have gods and guardians at our side. Leave us your gear, your friend, and we will let the rest of you go. Me: *Pulling fried chicken leg outta my bag and starting to eat it before him* You mean that guardians? Were killed them. Ghoul(Surprised but still not shaken): It doesnt matter. Our god will kill you all. Me: We will kill your god. Il give you one chance. Flee now, or when im done with your pathetic god, im going to went for you next. Whey start shooting, we start shooting. Ah, agressive negotiations(at that point it wasnt combat, we still talked, but shot each other at the same time). Long story short - slime breaks into the building and starts devouring them ghouls. Whey retreat and were forced into a bossfight. We absolutely DEMOLISH that thing, as i threw a bottle of vodka into it, and my teammate sets it on fire, basically making over 65% of its health in 2 moves, so with the bullets it is enogh to kill it even before it walks up to us(whitch is good, as that thing oneshots everything at meele range). We go outta building and there whey are - all ghouls and their leader before me. He tries to ask something about their god, but i just stand to him and yell at his face with most menacing voice i can muster, while doing it at GM irl. -YOUR GOD IS DEAD!!!! And whey flee. All of them. Thing is, i frightened GM irl so hard he fall out of his chair. So he gave me a crit for that and didnt even made me roll. That will be the story of the day i have saved the party wining 4 intimidation checks back to back, and finishing it with intimidation IRL. And that all without even having the class to boost that intimidation. Basically that day rogue was the face of the party, putting few points into that sweet skill.

[@Ben-yp2le]

Home brew campaign. I’m playing a warlock and I get hit by 3 TARRUSQUES. This is happening during the final fight and I’m going damn crazy when suddenly I remember about hurl through hell. I try it on one and I roll A NAT 20! Then another on damage and I do it 3 times. And at this time I was about to hand in my character sheet. My character is now renowned in my group and in the game, there is even a damn RELGION about it in the campaign.

[@Dragon---]

My level 5 artificer, Roger, the others prayers are a bard/rogue, multi class, and a barbarian is the group, we are in the under mountain, and we run into 3 manticores, in the same same room, and all three of them gotta take full tuns before any PC got to play, so the rogue died right away the barbarian was brought down at half health, and I was somehow not touched, the rogue was next, and immediately rolled a natural one on the death saving throw, so that the barbarian comes up and runs into combat and cannot land a single it hit, so I spend my action to get the rogue back up and bonus action to get my steel defender to defend me again and also attack which misses, the mancors are up again, now with barbarian goes down the rogue goes down again, and I am still not touched a long story short it was just me alone taking on all three of them. I won and I only got hit once.

[@TheHerrDoctor]

Me (A hight elf knowlage cleric) and a Heragon thief went with a bungh of civiliand to hunt chocolate eggs in a forest (there was a fair in the town and we got information that something dangerous was inside that forest). The rogue was cought in a trap and now we had to face 3 orcs and their boss (possibly an orog). We managed to survive thanks to my character using a spiritual weapon to get the thief free, spirit guardians to kill the orcs that were swarming me and command to make the boss run away from us. We lest this encounter on 1 and 3 hp respectively. I have the feeling that this spell combo was the only reason we got away

[@zacharysieg2305]

Not sure if it counts, but my character was almost pushed out of a tower once; he only survived because the party’s paladin grabbed him by his tail. (Context, he’s a dragonborn warlock, and at character creation the DM let me choose whether or not he had a tail. Really glad I chose tail!)

[@matthewlabodin3981]

Level 1 Undead Kobold Warlock. I got crit by some kind of shark. Luckily I had Form of Dread up. The damage was more than double my max HP, but 1 less than that plus the Temp HP from Form of Dread. Luckily, the party killed the shark and the ranger dragged my body to shore. Several hours later, I coughed up a bunch of seawater and asked if I died again.

[@danielmontoya1069]

Had a wizard hit my barbarian with disintegration, i failed the check but still had relentless endurance from being an orc. Dm stuttered for a minute before ruling that i survived but lost an arm, stopping the spell with sheer rage and will. He later got the arm replaced with a metal one.

[@TheDuelManiacs]

Im playing what i lovingly call a Glass Tank. It's a Clocksoul Sorcerer multiclass with a Divine Warlock that uses temporary HP and damage reduction to make up for a low HP pool, and we're currently level 13. We got in a fight with a room full of helmed horrors and an adult topaz dragon. I left the horrors to my party and used my energy trying to Earthbind or Hold Monster on the dragon. The dragon didn't like me trying to ground him, and he got me down to 6 HP. Now, the adult topaz dragon has a fun ability that deals a ton of necrotic damage (save for half). If this damage reduces you to 0, you die. I failed my save and took 23 damage. Dead, right? Nope! I used Tomb of Levistus to get 10x my warlock level in temporary hp, which ate 20 points of that damage and left me standing at 3.

[@dragonriderabens9761]

home brew modern setting with guns we were fighting what were essentially Chaos Marines one of them got a nat 20 on me...the squishy, artificer sniper SOMEHOW SURVIVED WITH 3HP LEFT I thought for sure I was dead there.

[@AristasTheMonsterHunter]

When I clicked on this somehow I forgot this is D&D channel, I was about to comment of the 4 times I almost died irl 😂

[@funnyblog100]

My bard somehow survived being run through with a greatsword and dropped off a cliff. The party found him unconscious in a pool of water which he survived because I reminded the dm that he couldn't drown because of an earlier diving mission we were on. He had a respirator in his comedy mask. He was fished out and his arm was shattered by the fall in order to continue fighting the monsters that were down there we amputated his arm and used heat metal to cauterize the wound. His arm was replaced with a prosthetic courtesy of our forge cleric. His wounds were stitched up by our wizard who was a divination wizard and had proficiency in medicine and she had the lucky feat so basically couldn't fail the medicine checks required. He still suffered some organ damage. My bard also previously survived being speared through the chest due to a lucky nat 20 on a death save with just 1hp. He also survived an axe to the abodomen and a cave collapsing on top of him. So many near death experiences and lucky rolls on my part. The amount of injuries he sustained should have killed anyone but he kept cheating death again and again returning with a new scar or injury. He also had the highest kill count in the campaign. He was from the college of whispers and had feats like sharpshooter and crossbow expert. Several encounters got absolutely wrecked by him.

[@lcajueiro]

I was a druid wildshaped as a spider sneaking into a military base. They caught me. I unwildshaped in front of 20 armed guards while the rest of my party was in the other room. I somehow survived.

[@jocelynmenard8511]

Many years ago i was playing a minotaur clerc , killed at the top of a small tower ruin , one of my friend relived me , then i start casting a healing spell on myself to gain few more live points . roll a critic 1 fail . result , the wall behind me exploded killed me again and in same killed the friend was just reliving me .

[@zifir4803]

I got nuked. Like strait up real nuke in magitech setting. Damage roll was around 10d20 force + 15d20 fire + 10d20 radiance. My DM haven't rolled more then 2 on ANY of the dice so I took only 73 damage combined before Rage cuts it in half. My Barbarian lived with literal 4 hitpoints looking straight at BBEG acrose the arena of colosseum that we fought in.

[@Bravo6-0actual]

Not me but my party’s cleric. During the session he got knocked out 3 times. First he got smited by a demon and the DM rolled high on damage. They me, the paladin who had cure wounds and lay on hands used the latter to bring him to 20 hp. We take a long rest then fighting a demon that tried to hide in a corner of knocked out. I also got knocked out and we both were brought back. Then while fighting our dead party members he got knocked out and brought back again. His reward going from level 4 to 5

[@wolfskinchanger]

Thanks to a combination of poor judgement and unlucky rolls, my rogue was being eaten alive by wild animals; while he was making death saves, the druid wild shaped into a giant spider and used her webbing to pull him out of the beasts' reach. By rights the rogue should've died before the druid got to him, but at the time I was unaware that taking damage while making death saves counted as a failed death save; if anyone else at the table knew, they were kind enough to keep quiet. However, one player spent a good month making occasional jokes about the bad decision that had gotten me into that mess, until I finally put my foot down and told him that if I wanted to spend the rest of my life being mocked for one mistake, I'd go into politics.

[@Derginator]

I the Paladin misty stepped onto a baby black dragon, somehow hung on for like 5 rounds. It was killed and I fell into a 15’ deep pool of acid, I just walked out and climbed up the wall. Made it out with like 20hp somehow

[@dantewest9218]

About half way through the very first session of our current campaign. Im playing a lvl 1 sorceror with 10 hp max. Only just got to thr village were pur first quest was to find the origin of some magic necklaces that were sending people mad. Whilst trying to book room for our party we found one on the tavern keeper. My character managed to get it off her neck and decided to smash it on the floor. The dm looked at me laughed and proceeded to roll 20 on 2d10 laying out everyone except the barbarbarian and outright killing my brand new character. My character only survived found to a resurrection amulet we each had been given at the outset. My character is now terrified of rubies and necklace's

[@culturewarsdiplomacy]

Jumped out of a Star Jammer that was currently within the world but in the sky above a world even with Aasimar wings it was not wise for my monk.

[@ruggedlemmings9163]

>Am lvl 8 Monk named Xander >Party is exploring a dungeon in the form of an "abandoned" wizard's tower >DM calls for passive perception check >All fail >Benevolent DM says that I got close enough to passing that my instincts sense that something is amiss >I tell party to hold as I cautiously proceed down a Definitely Not Trap Filled Corridor >Make it half way down >Trigger the trap >Walls open, revealing 3 dragon head statues on each side (so 6 total) >Statues on the left all launch a Fireball targeting me >Statues on the right all launch a Lightning Bolt targeting me >Succeed 6 Dex Saves in a row >Smoke clears to reveal my monk standing in the middle of the hallway >Only damage is to my pride as the front of my pants are now visibly soaked >DM is so amazed he declares that my sandals absorbed some of the magic that was fired at me >Sandals become Xander's Juke Shoes, granting the wearer +2 to Dex Saves Gotta love Evasion. :^)

[@JacobL228]

We were down a party member because our rogue had ghosted us IRL, and it was me (the fighter/wizard) and the paladin/cleric in disguise in a warehouse full of enemy soldiers working as laborers moving crates because our DM only really cares about combat and doesn't give us gold. Eventually, one of the enemy generals or something (we're really not sure about their military structure, but it was clearly a midboss) shows up and recognizes the paladin from when he accidentally outed himself as an enemy at a parade the day before. The soldiers all turn on him and I cast Ice Knife on him to maintain my cover and to damage a couple of the soldiers in the AOE. The other party members show up and the DM has some homebrew enemies make an appearance that frighten anyone nearby that fails a high DC check. I fail but the others are good thanks to high stats or abilities that negate the effect. Next turn, the monsters activate another bullshit ability that paralyzes anyone within range that's frightened. However, by this time, I'm next to the paladin who's activated his aura of protection, negating my frightened condition. The paladin leaves through a side door and I make like I'm going after him while running away from the monsters and also blocking the door with my big half-orc body (my race is important). At this point, I'm next to the midboss guy who admonishes me for being so incompetent. I apologize and he questions my accent, figuring out who I am (more bullshit, but also a funny callback to something from a few months ago). I immediately drop the facade and ask him how his secret project is going, hinting that we were the ones who had sabotaged it a few weeks ago to taunt him. That was not a smart move on my part. He then commands the soldiers to all attack me. Meanwhile, the commotion has attracted the attention of other midbosses who were in town for the aforementioned parade, who start laying siege to the wizard and warlock/wizard (we all chose different wizard subclasses) who came to back us up earlier. The wizard starts casting a Teleportation Circle to get us out of there while the warlock holds off the enemy. The paladin starts heading over to help them, but that left me outside the range of his aura, so I was paralyzed. Without being able to speak, move, or attack, the soldiers and the first midboss all auto-crit on me. First, I used a loophole to cast Shield and saved myself from dying once. Then I took a series of hits that almost downed me, but didn't thanks to my 20 in Constitution (high initial stat roll, racial stat boost, and use of the Manuel of Bodily Health) and the Tough feat giving me a ton of HP. Then, I used Orcish Resilience to save myself again. Finally, I used another loophole to cast what was essentially Misty Step as an ability, taking me out of range of the paralysis ability, and casting Expeditious Retreat to hightail it to the Teleportation Circle where we all barely escaped just as a multi-stage boss we had had to teleport away from as well showed up. I was so sure I was going to die I wrote a heartfelt letter to the party for them to find in my pocket saying how much he loved adventuring with them and instructing them to take his equipment and sent his body to the church just outside his hometown. I'm keeping the note on hand because last session, a ghost magically turned me into an old man and next session, we're assailing a fortress whose resident soldiers, thanks to the paladin accidentally screwing up again, know we're coming.

[@MrRukrio1]

some of you may remember a "Doorslayer". a dragonborn barbarian that was notorious for rolling strength checks for opening doors and not exploding them from her sheer force of doing so. one time, the Doorslayer had seperated from the party and, with help from one of the campaign's many DMPCs (who were surprisingly well managed, i may add) decided to raid an encampment of fellow dragonborn like her and her DMPC companion. this encampment was NOT FRIENDLY and somehow through a mix of dumb luck and abusing the toon physics the DMs (at the time) had in play, basically non-lethal'd the entire encampment without anybody noticing. the Doorslayer would proceed to have their moment that would set them on the path to being a Deathguard by taking out some giant Castlevania Legion-esque abomination that was clearly meant as a boss of some kind for the whole party to deal with- but no, Doorslayer and her DMPC companion had basically locked the fuck in and put it back to rest, with Doorslayer even getting the final blow. in case you're wondering how they're doing now, we uh, we kinda have an assortment of legendary weapons on hand. *Doorslayer's is one that lets them be a barbarian while having a level 20 fighter's amount of attacks before action surging.*

[@liushinoru6716]

I'm currently in Curse of Strahd, and my Ranger/Bard character died to an insanely unlucky streak on Death Saves. My replacement character was a Dragonborn Terrormancer that had the story of being the pet of my previous character, and the grief and rage towards Strahd's minions caused a transformation. The first fight after returning to the campaign? Defending a town against the big man himself. I hit him with multiple attacks with Divine Smite and 2024 True Strike to make use of Radiance. He then proceeded to land a critical hit on me, which took me to nearly 0 HP, but as I stood there, I made the decision to call out his daddy issues directly to his face and he just fucking flew off and left his bat minions to deal with us. I will always remember that as the day I "Made a power hungry simp think about what his beloved papa thinks of him."

[@TheSqoad]

Playing Curse of Strahd as a Lv4 Aarakocra Druid. Fought 3 Night Hags in a tiny building. Me and 2 teammates took 3 Lighting Bolts to the face, one which almost insta-killed me, and I took a Critical Hit claw attack. Somehow, by some miracle, we survived that. But I probably smell like fried chicken now.

[@Author1219]

The island arc. Cyberpunk/Shadowrun inspired GURPS game. Our wrestler was hired to fight a match against an older wrestler (think of The Undertaker’s reputation, & you’re close enough) on a tropical island. It was a paradise, except the cleric/paladin (me) got disconnected from her goddess and flipped shite. After we discovered a giant ritual, it was time for the match. We had sabotaged one side of the cage, but our wrestler ignored that and opened the side that was facing six gunners. My cleric jumped in the way, healed the wrestler and got shot. She spent one action to immunize him against bullets, failed to cast a healing spell on herself, and was unconscious turn three on combat one. To get off this island, we had to take out anti-aircraft gunners (which our sniper did) and survive three waves of 10 enemies. Meanwhile, the healer of the party lay dying to the point her goddess (who was quite irked at the disconnection) went “No. You are not allowed to die” and healed her between the AA and endurance test enough to get her to the escape chopper. Only a single lucky roll and DM generosity prevented the cleric getting skewered wave one.

[@entityofcreation1770]

I was swallowed by a giant worm, had 4 hp left (it did about 7 minimum whilst I was being digested) and the turn right before I'd have died our sorcerer for eaten aswell and froze the worm

[@sieghart2583]

I play with this hellish cowboy reborn (kinda ghoul from Fallout and ghost rider from Marvel mix) and in our session last week we were infected with a homebrew corruption from my DM's world and the goddesses of life performed a ritual to prevent our death by the corruption but this caused consequences in the form of physical mutations in the characters, my character (who doesn't like the gods very much) became furious and grabbed the collar of one of the goddesses screaming "fix what you did to me now", she then paralyzed him, he kept screaming about how the gods are incompetent and everything is left to mortals because of them, she used silence on him, a few minutes later the goddess removes the spells from my character and his reaction is to point a gun at her, she instantly uses banishment on him and leaves him trapped in another dimension for a few minutes as punishment, my DM said that she only didn't kill him because it was in fact her fault and he was only punished for his boldness and disrespect but that in the end in a way he is right (I will probably continue doing it inconsequential things like that because it's part of his personality)

[@Questfinder1]

I was playing solo adventures I downloaded from dmguild during the pandemic and I did not read the wild magic table close enough before playing a specific adventure. As I was writing weekly adventures to keep occupied and not lose my mind... My level 5 Ranger Firbolg with enlarge person on him got hit with "Any current spell cast on you is reduced by half (permenant). I was like he is currently around 8 1/2 normal.. the math was not mathing in his favor. He ended up be permanently stuck 12.5 ft tall. Then the next wild magic spell that hit him was because of Deity of the forest being angered.. and he was permanently given 1D4+1 levels of Psychic/Psion. The video of my epic meltdown rolling that had my husband laughing for hours. I was so pissed at the fucking Gnome Wizard who caused both things to happen. "save a gnomes life, he curses you for the rest of yours." Its been a journey. 😂

[@cmykrgb1469]

I really shouldn't be First death was from close quarters friendly fireball (brought back by "act of God" after the party returns to camp, this will be relevant by death 4) Second death from upscaled Shatter spell and failing the saving throw. Killed outright (brought back by Revivify) Third death from another friendly fireball (Revivify again) 4th was from another AOE but I failed the death saves this time (Revivify again, but because I gave spell wrought needles of Revivify to EVERYONE in my party in case our healer died during BBEG fight) That last one caused Paladine to tell me that he knew he "made the right decision" to bring me back that first time. "You have shown selfless sacrifices and did everything in your power to protect those around you, even at the cost of your own life." This prompted a new story arc where he's raising orphaned dragons. The kicker is that I can't die again, as I no longer have my human soul because it was replaced with that of a dragon. I mean. It's Paladine. I'm not contesting the decision. I just gotta be a bit more careful now.

[@jlady4110]

I am playing a high elf druid - she's not particularly smart - she said yes to a god who's habit of use and burn all vessels they take, managed to kick the god out and survived.

[@bassmikemikepugh8971]

Wooo! My comment made it in a video! I have so many more stories about Elric the Paladin.

[@BlackWolfessUSCM]

We had to fight a purple dragon and long story short after a near plauer wipe from plasma breath the last one standing was myr anger at 5 jjp. I rolled my attack and bonus attacks and hit 3 nat 20's. dropped that mother like a sack of potatos. i looked at the dead dragon and said "Yipee Kiy Yee mother fufcker" and contemplated why i lived while i got our helaer up so she scoul get to work on the fallen party.

[@captain-commander8138]

Vecna is a god / god-like entity so do everything you can in your power NOT TO PISS HIM OFF.

[@noranekosparks4177]

Toppu, my Four Elements Monk, earned the moniker of "The Invincible Monk". This madlad facetanked multiple fireballs and buildings collapsing onto him, all at 1 hp. But his most impressive feat was this. The party had been ambushed by a tribe of lizardfolk and their crocodile attack beasts. Toppu had the unfortunate problem of only having melee attacks. So he managed to draw aggro from 8 separate lizardmen, who started biting the crap outta him. So what's a poor monk to do? Flurry of Blows? Step of the Wind to backflip away and eat 8 oppertunity attacks? No. Toppu decides the best course of action is to call out to our shy, scared shitless druid and direct her. "Cast Moonbeam on me, now!" "W-w-what?" "You heard me!" So the druid casts the highest level of Moonbeam she can, centered on my Monk so it'd clip every enemy around him. All but 2 of them immediately crumple to the ground, and Toppu is left standing with 1 HP. We mop up the remaining lizardmen snd crocs. From that day forth, it became a legitimate tactic to draw enemy aggro towards Toppu and "Cast Moonbeam On The Monk". Toppu survived every time.

[@skyguard1an]

My squishy 15 year old satyr bard boy, once had a fight with a red wizzard, alongside my wherewolf fighter party member, while thrown out of a airship, so VERY high in the sky, soon as all 3 of uss fell out, i used feather fall, grabbed my friend, used a grappling hook on the wizzard to pull uss both closer after she tried teleporting away and after a VERY close few rounds, with extremely low health, still deadly high in the air, with the wherewolf player now charmed to also attack me. Next round, AND feather fall close to running out, i finished her off with heat metal, the only damaging spell that had i had any left off, watched as her forehead jewel melted into her skull, re cast feather fall on me and. The wherewolf, as we landed gently on the ground. 7 hp left

[@justjerry199]

Once, I forget what level I was at the time, low mid at the very highest. I was playing a mage in a party that ended up becoming prisoner gladiators. they didn't let me use spells or any of my stuff really, so I had no armor and a basic sword to fight an armored cyclops dual wielding swords. After a long grueling bout of rolling dice to simulate sword swinging I finally managed to fell the hulking warrior. Although now that I type all that out, with a couple of other memories from that group that I won't get into now, I think they hated me and didn't want me to play with them :/

[@goldenyanderechan]

Artificer teifling, just got took to an hi tech prison (keep in mind homebrew heavy setting) I had just survived an fight with the world eater from skyrim by fleeing and unintentionally nearly killing my party 😅 Now I have ended up with the company from the alien moives as my captors and I'm planed to be experimented on so I just telport my way out my cell fighting for my life with cantrips runing into death angels killer plants and othe horror moive creature but the one that caught me was six from the avp game like I'm still alive (for now) but holy cow just how

[@GT-wj3gl]

My Artificer lived through an insane amount of nonsense over the course of a 2.5 year Curse of Strahd campaign. At level 4, my Artificer got eaten by a shambling mound in the basement of the Death House. The rest of my party were struggling to fight it while I was able to deal the killing blow from the inside of the beast with only 2 hit points remaining. That Artificer went on to survive multiple encounters with werewolves, undead, and all sorts of nasty critters in Barovia. By the end of the campaign as Strahd lay defeated, I realized that my Artificer was the only party member to have never been downed in combat over the course of the entire campaign. Despite all the close calls and low hit points at the end of fights, his hit points never actually hit zero.

[@sairus3239]

Not DnD and not "how the hell i survived?" But close. We were playing tabletop version of DOOM (for those who don't know its a turn based game for up to 4 players with one player being a GM, controlling the demons) My character took BFG before the final fight with cyberdemon and was on low HP. I used all my movement points to approach the cyberdemon and his followers then proceeded to shoot him with bfg point blank. All demons died and Cyberdemon took a LOT of damage that turn (i got lucky with dice throw) leaving him at the brink of death. The enraged boss killed my space marine immediately, but the others quickly shot off his remaining hp in one turn, taking no damage at all.

[@pcalix17]

A man "lying" with a dragonborn. Even though the Dragonborn female was not the strongest or the most durable in the party, they were far more muscular and intimidating than the skinny, naive cleric man. The entire endeavour resulted from a long-standing grudge where the Dragonborn thought that the cleric was a fool and a sham while the man thought the warrior was an egotist and an infant. But the cleric boldly said at one point in pure jest, "If you want to kill me, at least sleep with me so I can die happy." He was completely taken by surprise when the Dragonborn agreed to his terms. What followed was a night of fisticuffs, grappling, intimacy, and pain. The cleric used all of his spell slots to ward off the inevitable but they both knew that he would run out eventually. Yet as he started to slowly approach death, he smiled and said to his killer, "I was wrong. I think we've been calling each other the opposite insults." Then the man was strangled but somehow, as if his god refused, he succeeded in the death saving throws. The cleric would wake up after being unconscious for the rest of the night, trying to contain his mirth when he learned that the Dragonborn had fallen asleep on top of him mid-strangle, saving his life. They eventually made up but the man slowly became adept at avoiding that kind of demise.

[@Isru709]

My dm trew me on a room with spinning blades as a level 3 wizard with 10 constitution -10 hp 4 more hp and i was death

[@kevinthomas4064]

Steven He's Dad: How the hell do you fail at a last stand...... my champion Timmy walked uphill into the fires of Hell both ways and died gloriously..... you.... you just fell in a ditch. Says a warlock Patron while secretly having saved said warlock

[@TokenAU]

I fought a flesh golem at fifth level by my self

[@darkphoenix539]

We were fighting red dragon and my halfling druid was caught in bite attack I rolled 20 on avoiding attack and DM ruled I managed to avoid teeth but still i was about to be swallowed. -Can i use my immovable rod to try to avoid getting into his stomach? -roll acrobatics I don’t remember what i rolled but as the result i was stuck hanging for my life in dragons throat, 1 round later I failed my saves and landed in dragons stomach and I was about to start getting digested. After taking acid damage around 80% of my remaining hp i managed to climb slightly above stomach acid levels but I lost my bag of holding My bag of holding contain equivalent of 2cubic meters or 500 gallons of magic powder (illegal drug) which i was currently trying to smuggle. DM face when i remained about it. Lets just say next round we had no problems with dragon. Cause of death OD.

[@donnydoesthings]

In the same encounter me and another person almost died BY. SPIDERS. I was a druid bard multi and in one turn I went from max hp in wild shape to 17 hp I believe I took 26 damage if I remember correctly. And the other player was a homebrew class that was similar to a monk mixed with a wizard but it was nerfed since you could do 200d8 damage in one turn but he was incapacitated by webs and he went from around 25 hp to 4 if he didn't pass the poison save he would've been dead. So to sum it up on session 0, 2 players almost died

[@donnydoesthings]

We just finished the dungeon and turns out it was a level 7-8 dungeon while we were level 3 and for the boss it was a zombie totem of the bear barb and about 10 other enemies and EVERYONE was down but the ranger/monk and he lived with 1 hp. Non of us could get up before the last skeleton went and it didn't die so it went. And it missed letting the ranger/monk kill it. To summerize we beat a level 8 dungeon at level 3 with 1 hp to spare

[@alphaxplorer8590]

Ok so, on the dnd night at my local store, 1 of 2 tables canceled, 1 player from table 1 joined us. Tricked us thinking he was playing an npc, NOPE. Level 7 sorceress aimed to assassinate our fighter me the paladin freely takes her hand when offered. DIMESION DOOR 500FT ABOVE THE MANSION. They cast feather fall on themselves, but I also had a feather talisman. We rolled initiative we both rolled nat 1s but the had higher dex. They cast dispell magic on me, dm gives me 1 action. Level 2 divine smite and the fact that I had a realy good blade. The sorceress went down, I plummet 500ft crash through the roof somehow not getting insta killed, hit the base floor of mansion auto failing 2 death saves, fighter barely healed me in time with poition.

[@alphaxplorer8590]

Also we have drawn like 12 cards from deck of many more things, over half that from my pcs

[@darcraven01]

i was teleported into a beam of radiant light that delt enough unresistable damage that it was able to one shot the bbegs.. only reason i lived was i had the shadowfell brand tattoo and was able to cloak myself in shadow, cutting the damage i took in half (technically wasnt resisted, rather half the damage was absorbed so the dm let it slide). it did oneshot our fighter and bard (put both at death saves which i was able to get them out of the light before it perma-killed them with gust of wind which i then used to push both bbegs into the light before the final fight started, bypassing the whole final encounter... sry dm, i know you had a big fight planned.. my bad. XD)

[@barrybend7189]

Play rouge..... Win a duel against an Orc warlord without stealth.

[@DHTheAlaskan]

Warhammer Fantasy RPG 2nd edition: I was on my second character, a dwarf miner. We were escorting a caravan while being chased by a group of beastmen. So to cut down on supplies and buy time, my Dwarf, Svenlock, already injured from a previous fight, decided to buy them time. He challenges the leader of the beastmen to a duel. Now the leader of the Beastmen was a champion of Khorn the God of Blood and Skulls. Thing is Khorn is big on honorable combat over slaughter. While he doesn't care if the weak dies if you have someone willing to stand against you before the unarmed masses, you HAVE to accept the duel. The GM told me I was going to die, and I said I know. I proceed to parry nearly EVERY attack against me and deal some nasty hits crippling every limb of the champion before I drove my pick through his chest. The GM, who wasn't all that stable emotionally due to his dad being very sick (he passed a week or so after this game) had another npc Insta gib me. Later he did apologize and backtracked it to me becoming a champion of Khorn and leading the beastmen away from the caravan and some small buffs to my 3rd character.

[@theofficerfactory2625]

These captions are quite off and need to be checked before posting.

[@majinsole8554]

Bananas. ~_~

[@Crocogator]

"I've only had Farren for 5 minutes, but if anyone were to happen to him, I would kill of you, the entire world, and then myself." Farren is a puppy

[@antisanity_]

hi

[@thomaswilliams3836]

hi

[@inthebackgroundshadow]

hi

[@familytablet6453]

hi