This Man Was Obsessed By His 1950s Suburban Upbringing

To support my efforts to create more clips please donate to me at www.patreon.com/allinaday. I interviewed James Gilbert in 1989. He grew up in the 1950s and became a passionate observer, analyst and writer focused on that era. He is a Fulbright professor of history at the University of Maryland. He has written 11 books. I found his perspective uniquely fascinating because he grew up as a middle-class white kid in suburbia and continues to analyze his experience and the generation that came from 1950s suburban America. #suburbia #1950s #middleclass

[@Arrowed_Sparrow]

I graduated in 2007, and I vividly remember so many people talking about all of the wonderful things they were going to do after graduation. Yet if you sat down and had an actual conversation about it, we were absolutely terrified. For a lot of us, going to school was our home, there was far to many broken families. But hey, we were going to rule the world. Just don't ask us how.

[@princesseuphemia1007]

Wow. I graduated in 2011 and went on to do my own thing. I still haven't been to college although I plan to in a few years. I have travelled all over and done lots of cool stuff because I didn't feel ready to "settle down" at such a young age and the older I've gotten the more mixed reactions I see people have to the lifestyle I've chosen. It sucks to see some of my own friends from back then look down on me now because I'm not married with kids and a 6 figure soul sucking career like they have. I have some friends who still love me despite the different lifestyles we live because our bond as friends is more important to them, and I also have friends who are jealous of how much freedom I have that they don't. The saddest group of all though are people I used to hang out with who came from broken families just like I did and we used to spend hours talking about how shitty our parents were and how we were the good ones and we were going to break away after high school and live the happy lives we truly deserved as adults, except most of us didn't. There are a few who have grown up to be kind-hearted, stable, happy human beings but most of the "friends" I had in that group just grew up to be the same psychotic, abusive, violent pieces of shit their parents were. I look at them now and think damn where did their innocence go? It seems like just yesterday we were all talking about how we were all going to change the world for the better and live happily ever after. :P

[@Arrowed_Sparrow]

@@princesseuphemia1007 It's a strange response people have. I think when they see that you actually made that choice, that you looked past all of the uncertainty and dove in. They get mad that they didn't. You weren't some random person, you did the same stuff they did, you just didn't let fear get the better of you. You're absolutely right on how much it sucks though. I've lost far too many friends because of hatred, or a god d@mn drug overdose. But as long as you can wake up everyday and be happy with the path you chose, that's all that matters. And if you find new friends along the way, all the better. :)

[@Theomite]

HOLY BALLS, THAT COULD BE A NEW SERIES: *PRE-RECESSION GRADUATING CLASS MEMORIES.* People who were classes of '05, '06, '07 about what they expected life to be like vs. what happened, and when it started happening for them.

[@princesseuphemia1007]

@@Arrowed_Sparrow Thanks! It really helps to hear words of encouragement like that. I mean in some ways I know I am behind the rest of society and need to catch up, not that I want to conform totally. I only want to conform in the areas where it makes logical sense to and will improve my quality of life long term, but overall I know I'll never be happy just taking the prescribed path of least resistance that most people take throughout life. Life has to have deeper meaning than that for me, and yes I think a lot of people hate me for that and look down on me for being "irresponsible", "immature" ect while also complaining about how much they wish they could get away from their job and their spouse and their kids that they had way too young but now they're stuck with them. Luckily though, most people aren't like that and like you said I have found lots of new friends that support and love me for who I am along the way. Also I'm sorry you had to lose so many of your own friends in such awful ways. I send you my condolences.

[@Ben.878]

Princess Euphemia100 I think your situation (which is actually similar to mine) helps you to filter out the good from the bad though - someone who looks down on you immediately you can walk away, which is better than being with a deceiver who is toxic. Also, I agree it’s frustrating how most people who end up being parents are the shitty ones - as if no lesson was learnt from beforehand...the scars ‘have’ to replicated on the offspring. Sad. Although, I guess we can only look forward though and make the most of lessons we have learnt from

[@BartAnderson_writer]

I was born in 1950, grew up in suburbs. My experiences match what James Gilbert describes in the interview. I was lucky to find other outsiders, so wasn't so subject to the rules he describes. And it was delicious to be a rebel then, to find "Catcher in the Rye" or "Steppenwolf". Each era has its own flavor, its own advantages and disadvantages. It's good to be get outside one's own era and see what life was like elsewhen.

[@donaldbutcher1260]

Ditto

[@foxopossum]

Elsewhen...i love that

[@ESponge2000]

@@foxopossum I looked up the word elsewhen and learned it was used in the English language centuries ago and ran out of fashion so let’s revive it

[@foxopossum]

@@ESponge2000 yes!!!😄😄😄

[@WasatchIntercept]

Peer pressure, an unwritten code of conduct, clothing do's and don'ts...sounds like everybody's youth, regardless of what decade they grew up in.

[@milkyoni]

The code of conduct is very loose today and mostly revolves around somehow emulating wealthy rappers / popstars

[@ethanwashoe5868]

Fox it’s different but the same, multiple trends happen at a time but whatever your friend group wears your expected to dress the same.

[@RetrocadePodcast]

GreyGeek ^ we found the brainwashed right wing boomer

[@RetrocadePodcast]

@GreyGeek Oh, good one. Did you think of that while you waited for your social security check? Nutsy codger

[@RetrocadePodcast]

@GreyGeek Only to those who have clear cognitive dissonance. I suggest you speak with your doctor, be happy you have Medicare

[@marclove1159]

This is a very thought provoking conversation, but a bit too much for 5:00 AM. I’m going back to bed.

[@DCFlow-em6zy]

2:22am Miami 😂

[@lukegromacki9863]

It’s currently 5:03 am in Wisconsin

[@Feardracus]

Best Internet comment ever

[@unicornmadness6286]

Love it 🤣🤣🤣

[@katherinechase3674]

Abby bed rocks!

[@Caperhere]

Lot of wedding photos from the fifties with the bride holding a bouquet of flowers in front of her belly.

[@saltydawg7078]

True. I was the flower for my oldest cousin. Lol

[@snakesoccult2444]

@Victor Vaida shut up fed

[@foxopossum]

Hahahahaha

[@theboyisnotright6312]

Yep just like every era☺️😉

[@AAmoroso]

close your eyes. a young Jeff Goldblum tells you about the 50s.

[@JennRighter]

Oh my, that is so accurate it's terrifying.

[@bluecollar58]

Crap , you’re right !

[@2Manolo3]

Very close, but I can still hear a difference.

[@brpitrepeters7983]

Uncanny

[@lunakat5763]

Yes true!

[@Ben.878]

This makes me wonder if a society is best with well thought out guidance, but not repression exactly. Too much repression (IE 1950s) seems unnecessarily rough on ourselves, but too much personal freedom seems too unstable and removes social cohesion

[@Ben.878]

Angel Rosas I think they have good social cohesion (being fairly conservative), but their suicide rates likely point towards too much repression and certain social pressures

[@thedacters6851]

@Angel Rosas The society is pretty rough. People have few friends. Japan is like what America was in the 70's

[@songbirdforjesus2381]

@Angel Rosas in Japan it's very much like a combo of the 50s and the beginning of the computer age. Men are expected to work 60-70 hours a week and be totally devoted to the company. They are minimalists and many women stay home are quiet and take care of the house and children.

[@EpicKate]

With all this talk about rules and conformity, the thought that kept ringing in my ear was that life must have been near impossible for people in the autism spectrum.

[@EpicKate]

@@kaz1015 Thanks so much for sharing, it's so good to learn and see things from different perspectives.

[@tomf429]

I was born in 1951. I agree with his characterization of that time. It was somewhat comforting, as a child, that there were rules, conformity, etc. You knew exactly how you were expected to act, dress, and interact. As a child, I don't remember actually questioning or analyzing anything - it was just the way things were. Then, at around age 16 or 17 (late 1960's) everything changed. It was like being given your freedom. All the old rules went out the window. Sex, drugs, rock&roll. We scared our parents to death. Wild times. It took another decade to settle down into careers, marriage, kids, etc. Now, those that have survived, are on Medicare and being blamed for all that is wrong in the world.

[@jebalbert5903]

Didn't live back then so take this with a grain of salt but I sounds like ur freedom was handed to u that late because y didn't choose to buck the crazy ystem he described and take your Freedom before that point every generation goes through some form of it but if u never step up and wait for society to hand in your Freedom then it's not real freedom because u depended upon society to give it I said fuck society by like 8 or 9 and have embraced my weirdness since. It has caused me some discomfort I imagine it would have been a lot worse for me in the 50s BUT icant even empathize with feeling constrained by societies unwritten (and to some extent, written) rules it's just not a reality for me

[@Nikolapoleon]

Of course the blame is going to fall on your generation. According to your own characterization, the boomers went on vacation for an entire decade. Wild times... that your kids and grandkids have to pay for.

[@tomf429]

As I recall that decade from age 17 to 27 - I served 3 years in the Navy, finished 4 years of college, started my career, got married, and bought my first house. Hardly a vacation. More of a transition into adulthood. That transition seems to take much longer nowadays. Maybe all those rules we obeyed as kids served a purpose.

[@Nikolapoleon]

@@tomf429 So which is it? Sex, drugs, and rock & roll, or college, career, and marriage?

[@user-yx7dp2pl8t]

That was very well put

[@23ofSeptember]

I wonder how we will look at today's society in 30 years.

[@MARCIE12ification]

Yes

[@somerandomvertebrate9262]

They will marvel at how a politically correct thought police conformism managed to bring down the whole of western civilization.

[@unicornmadness6286]

In major disgust

[@artembolshakov3901]

Badly.

[@jctai100]

The same way. I see so many repeated patterns in David's works.

[@yellowblanka6058]

"The one thing you didn't want to do was to stand out, to wear something that was out of fashion somehow" - some things never change. People at large are still obsessed with appearance.

[@jamesrogers47]

Because are social creatures, they want to fit in. Fitting in requires you to meet the expectations of the group, to comply with the norms that have evolved over time within the group. It has always been thus, the only things that change are the expectations and norms. To believe that we have escaped the pressure to conform is a delusion. The pressure to conform is just as profound today (one might even argue, more intense,) than it was sixty or more years ago. We are told we must accept concepts that most people, if they were being wholly honest with themselves, realize are patently false and completely absurd, but the social consequences of not going along are perceived as too great. The very act of being a non-conformist has become a form of conformity imposed upon the majority. For example, tattoos (most especially facial and large area tattoos on visible parts of the body,) as well as body piercings other than of the ears in women, are seen by those who have them, as statements of non-conformity, yet those who have them have demanded that broader society conform to their aesthetic sensibilities. People in the larger society go along so as not to be thought narrow minded and staid. It is really no different than what people were doing in the 1950s.

[@thegribbs]

Really? At least where I live, fashion is very loose. Not since high school have I met many people who made fashion a key point in their life.

[@bperez8656]

This is called mass manipulation by the state and media apparatus

[@robinriebsomer4607]

I was born in 1951. There were 5 kids in my family. I was not taught that I am the center of universe. My parents struggled financially because they had 5 kids. I recall that as a girl that I was much more restricted than the boys. The biggest worry in high school was getting pregnant or being ostracized by peers. Opportunities for women in the work world were extremely limited. I chose to go into nursing. I think much of what he describes are the developmental issues that adolescents in every generation face. Who am I? Where do I belong? What are my values? What work shall I do? What rules should I follow? Do I rebel or conform?

[@michaelbradshaw8278]

I think Robin pretty much nailed it. We (teens), struggled with most of the same problems faced by contemporary teens. I feel teens of today face the same issues...perhaps different language, but same issue. Rumours did abound...the "what ifs," the "should I," and virtually every other questionable thing, was prevalent. It was a difficult time, at best. It was a mirrored image of our own parents, at worst. Time may change; minutely, hourly, daily, weekly, monthly, yearly... but teen thought; teen desire: NEVER CHANGES, regardless of the decade...and, that is extremely important! I am sure I have done something, that my Grandmother or Grandfather, did, as well!

[@saintd_ii]

Sounds like he's attributing his experience with the decade when it's likely every generation creates kids who feel as he does. His fixation on some things strikes me as self-absorbed and somewhat pessimistic. I get no sense he cares at all about moral decay.

[@jc.1191]

I think there's one specific difference. The parenting style across the board was authoritarian. Kids weren't allowed to emotionally develop and be themselves. Of course they rebelled. It gave way to an overly narcissistic attitude not found as prevalent in other generations.

[@linuxknight4076]

Brilliant as always David. Very cool perspective. As a 70s kid things like these bridge gaps in foggy memories of the elders in my youth, such that they make sense. I love your videos. Thank you!

[@lancelot1953]

Hi David, these interviews and the collection of views regarding our American Heritage. I truly appreciate that you took the time and effort to share your experience with the YT community. I do hope that you eventually release your priceless collection to one of our universities for preservation and posterity - This is our history, presented by the people that lived it. Thank you again, and Happy Easter (any videos on the Passover/Easter celebration in our past). Ciao, L

[@saltydawg7078]

Interesting. I grew up in rural America. No running water until the 60s. Same with indoor plumbing. Our focus was agricultural. I'd have that any day over suburbia

[@OakhillSailor]

May I ask the state & city you grew up in?

[@saltydawg7078]

@@OakhillSailor north dakota.

[@saltydawg7078]

@@michaelcraig9449 wish I knew. There are many small towns but access to services suffer. When I retire in 5 yrs I will be moving closer to where I grew up

[@garretphegley8796]

Shelburn Indiana population 1200.

[@ethanwashoe5868]

That’s really interesting I’m 24 and grew up in the city. I honestly can’t fathom life like that it seems like that way of life was a long time ago but clearly it’s not

[@bernhardk7720]

Such a good reflection and analysing. Thank you for sharing it. They should show this one and others you’ve recorded in school history classes.

[@hazeldecker622]

I'm so, so glad I stumbled upon this channel. You've really got something here. This is the history that can't be found in textbooks.

[@justagirllookingup]

I think all generations feel this way but if there is one thing I could tell the younger generation - don’t rush your youth away!!! So many of us have done that. Do more of the things you want to do and see before settling down b/c once you have responsibilities it can be harder to fit those things in and sometimes impossible. You don’t want to look back with a bunch of what ifs. Enjoy your life 😁

[@prussian7]

I can't help but to think of the movie Pleasantville

[@ewalker1057]

Where is the obsession. What he is saying can be said about many generations.

[@ewalker1057]

@@internetsafetycar He's not talking about going steady. He is talking about expectations. That is with any generation.

[@olegdepapa]

he is using clickbait titles to get views

[@seeingimages]

This guy has cultural myopia. He has also clearly never reflected on the impact of Freud's thought on societal perceptions. Claiming that in the 1950s "everything was sexual," as if people were oblivious to sexual associations and connotations before the 1950s is just shallow, myopic historical awareness. Freud made sexual associations and connotations an explicit, conscious theme long before the 1950s.

[@Queenie-the-genie]

E Walker It was the first generation that grew up watching TV, hence the commercialization of everything, widespread propaganda etc. It got worse and worse and now we are being ruled by greedy Oligarchs headed up by a muderous sociopathic criminal.

[@Queenie-the-genie]

seeingimages It was subliminally used in advertizing which became ubiquitous beginning in the 50's with daily exposure to pictorial come on's ....Sheesh

[@jasonhatt4295]

After watching this video its no wonder they were so rebellious in the 60s.

[@jasonhatt4295]

@@WAX1138 And they could've gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for those meddling kids! (The generation after them didn't seem too interested in doing that)

[@dbentleyto95]

Most definitely

[@Tomdelongpenis]

@@jasonhatt4295 I feel like that era of conformity set stage for at least 30 years of counter culture the beatniks the hippies 80s heavy metal and punk rock (where counterculture began to be based a little more around urban concerns) I'd say the skate scene in the 90s was the first counterculture since the not be based in rebellion against suburbia even tho that that was like half of the participants but before street skating hit skateboarding was also pretty much a suburban thing in the us at least I dunno my two cents maybe it's just that I was an edgy teen and my dad thought the 50s was a good time

[@jasonhatt4295]

@@Tomdelongpenis You sound right about that

[@armandoperez-dd7dw]

90's was the best decade of my life

[@ToastyCoClothing]

fuck the 1990s 2007 was the absolute best year fight me

[@anitaares8271]

For me, Every decade is better than the last.

[@videogamebomer]

@@ToastyCoClothing That year blowed.

[@movadoband]

The 90's was okay, sort of chill after living through the 80's tho.

[@JohnnyUtah15]

The '70s for me as a kid. The '80s when I was a teen/adult. 1984 was probably the best year, personally.

[@grenin1010]

Why would anyone thumbs down this video?

[@makomichael]

We're in a social dry spell right now and no one is talking to each other or letting loose or changing things or living.

[@BallsInMyCup_]

Michael Reynolds i think you’re in a dry spell. i had no hope for the future until i found friends and actually started doing shit.

[@garyoak317]

Michael Reynolds So True man

[@wucash5672]

man im going to crazy ass warehouse raves we going back to 90s here

[@songbirdforjesus2381]

@Alexander Jenkins now you got me laughing. Maybe it is about that time? Not yet. Hopefully

[@roberthaworth8991]

It's Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs at work. Tough to be socially creative when rent (shelter) is through the roof in most areas, healthcare is out of reach for many, student debt is looming, and you're worried about the future itself b/c of climate change.

[@PLOttawa]

Sounds like sex was this ominous god (or demon)-“everywhere but nowhere”-and that advertisers somehow were the only ones who knew how to summon them.

[@blueskies1848]

"Everywhere but nowhere" promoted by 1950's to early 60's separate bed sitcoms

[@songbirdforjesus2381]

PS, you've got to realize that back then out-of-wedlock pregnancy was a big deal. No birth control other than prophylactics, which guys hated, and didn't want the local drugstore person to know that they bought them because they knew their parents and it would be spread all over the town. Parents were also concerned for their Children's Welfare, and that they had a good life not cut short forever by circumstances that did not allow the full development of their lives

[@nugsymalone1247]

I abhor advertising. Its just garbage being vomitted upon you, to get in your head and control you.

[@foxopossum]

Eloquent

[@jacksobrooks]

A very cool way to put that.

[@stevebutler812]

And, leading this "feared" life of getting married, having kids, going to work, sounds very loving, caring, connected, and possibly capable of a satisfying life. Boring or secure? Rigid or Disciplined? Rebels or lost? Total Freedom is Chaos. My goodness, how I wish I could go back and choose that boring path. The road to a good life versus excitement and "luving". Hes right, we are being shaped by sales pitches, messages to live now and spend. The Turtle vs the Rabbit. Choose Turtle. Sliw and steady us not boring. Its calm. The Rabbit us so chaotic.

[@jasonludwig2488]

"We persuaded ourselves..." No. You were persuaded by bad actors, and done so in such a way as to make yourselves think you persuaded yourselves. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled...

[@cashinn7490]

Well said

[@retrovintagething7013]

Manufacture Consent and a very powerful "invisible hand" that tricks you into financial traps. Diamonds, student loans, weddings, hedonistic lifestyle, divorce then retirement homes. Dead at 85. 40 years premature. Life done right Humams can live healthy, happy to 130 easy without exploited the earth's natural resources.

[@sharondrury5676]

David, I certainly had a totally different experience. We didn’t get our TV until 1959. I was a teenager back then. Thank you for this interview. Interesting.

[@LRLadyflyromero]

Growing up in the 70's for me was much like this gentleman described. Though my life was for the most part uneventful. Yet I came in the world like a whirlwind, but because of so many variables like he described I was one confused person. I could have easily been a statistic of some sort. David, I am sure there are too many of us out there. LOL! Learning Loving, and faith is key! 😁💙

[@roberthaworth8991]

I'm 58, and find myself thinking more and more about my youth (late '60s to late '70s). Not b/c I'm getting old, but b/c I'm trying to figure out "the" point at which the US -- in terms of the economy, society, and our experiment in democracy -- went irretrievably wrong. Probably it was ca. 1976 (our Bicentennial, ironically), b/c several big landmarks on the road into the sunset had just been passed. Vietnam War, Watergate, the Gas Crisis, the TV show Solid Gold :-) ... And, 1979 was the last year (until the artificial economic "high" of 2019, now over) that average real wages for working-class US adults rose. It was followed by almost two years of ruinous inflation (18%+) that tanked our confidence in the economy and in the institutions ostensibly designed to protect it, and then by a generation of gross materialism and the beginnings, under Reagan, of the huge structural income inequality we witness today. Only later did we discover that the unions had been busted, various "trust funds" and "lockboxes" on our social benefits raided, colleges and hospitals had decided to maximize profits instead of serve the populace, and the US had become the most militaristic and aggressive power since the regime of the Austrian paperhanger -- which led us before long into the disastrous Iraq War that finished the job of eroding the people's confidence in government. What we're seeing now is the playing-out of trends born in the '70s.

[@GUAMANIANable]

"I'm trying to figure out "the" point at which the US ...went irretrievably wrong." It was in 1988 with the election of globalist George H. W. Bush - Reagan's biggest mistake.

[@markshaw5018]

Probably nixon doing away with the gold standard in 1971

[@cynthiaallen9225]

No wonder the beatnicks popped up during that time.

[@bluewaterpines8323]

Oh please don't say beatniks,as my Aunt Gloria,(who was a superintendant of several burrows in the art dept) would correct you and say,"darling,they are not beatniks,they are artists," as she led us down into an underground cafe with the bongo players wearing black hip berets.😉

[@alamooji3716]

@@bluewaterpines8323 your contradicting what you were just defending bro!

[@sh115067]

I would like a documentary about life before the first world war. What was the average person like

[@nette9836]

Absolutely fascinating to hear how stringent things seemed to be. At least in his experience. I couldn't imagine such a world. It must have felt like you could never truly hone your own personality - just always projecting a fake "you." There's something scary and pernicious about that...

[@bluewaterpines8323]

This man looks exactly like my physician.His demeanor,speaking,and all around intellect...uncanny really.tyou Sir hoffman.Another excellent interview.

[@harrylongofficial6248]

In a way things haven’t changed that much... people find it odd when I say that myself, a 23 year old male hasn’t ever dated a girl, not even been in any short relationships growing up. Why? Not because I don’t find women attractive, but because I wanted good grades in College, University and enjoyed spending time with my friends instead of going out to clubs which I hated. Now as a recent graduate, I can’t help but feel freaked out by seeing all my friends my age on facebook posting about their kids! That their pregnant! Engaged, married etc. Its only now as a 23 year old male who’s never dated, that I can see (as well as others in my boat) the marketing tools people use on young peoples perceptions to try and enforce young people to believe hookup culture isna steriotypical behaviour of their youth which means they may feel like they’re not normal unless taking part in this hookup culture. Perfect example, that show advertised all over youtube by ‘Spooked’ featuring the highschool red head virgin and typical american football player. You hear her inner voice talk about being worried she’s still a virgin in a way which would make any young person viewing the show feel like virginity isn’t something you should be proud of or try to keep as you get older, infact the show along with its adverts on KZbin enforce the opposit which is “If your still a virgin at 15 or older, your awkward and not cool”. My philosophy has always been, wait for the right one, the person you know you could spend the rest of your life with. With tv shows adding to the peer pressure that kids in school create on the matter isn’t helping.

[@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker]

I do hope that you become a subscriber and go to my channel homepage and look at the videos I have posted in the community pulldown menu helping people to create videos of their own stories so that I can share them with others who might find a meaningful. Please consider that opportunity. David Hoffman-filmmaker

[@title1pro]

Sounds like this guy took every rumor he heard on the playground way too seriously

[@Driver_88]

How was your experience growing up in the 50s in the US?

[@Wardell43]

Exactly Title.

[@Wardell43]

@@Driver_88 My experience was growing up Black with a Single White mom. I went to integrated schools where we were all treated the same. Other Black children's fathers worked in the same factories as the White fathers did and nearly every adult male that I knew, Worked. Nearly every Black family hoped that their child was going to go to college or the military. My family was very proud of Kenneth Bacon a Black Korean based fighter pilot. Now I knew everyone that hung out on "The Corner". and someone was always getting stabbed or shot. At 4, I found a double barrel sawed off shotgun that we took to the closest parents house and they believed it was used to rob a store. That was the last I saw of that gun. I doubt that they turned it in. In the summer everyone from 4 to 80 would play baseball in the street, which had been paved 30 years earlier and was mostly potholes. I remember Old "Rome(Jerome) he pulled a large wheeled cart yelling out, "Green beans, yellow beans, collards" as he moved down the street pulling the wagon and the housewives would come out and buy vegetables from him. Taking my wagon to the government warehouse to get peanut butter, canned span, sacks of flour, sugar, government cheese and Powdered milk made me realize very young to get a job and never drink powdered milk again. We should go back to that system.

[@menopassini9348]

This guy lives in the prison camp in his mind, every cliche there was. My Mom a farm girl who came of age in the early 50's. Her sister and her bought a used Chevy on credit and traveled the country til the late 1950's. They met many people just enjoying their lives until they were ready to marry. Not beatniks or odd balls just people traveling the country to experience what they saw in news reels or magazines. I remember watching TV with my Mom and she would say "I've been there" and tell a better story then was on the T.V.

[@milkyoni]

@@Wardell43 You grew up black with a white mom? So you grew up mixed and not black then?

[@kittyscat8905]

Ever one know what they had to do but no one wanted to do it. Now i know why everthing sucks

[@txvoltaire]

I once met a guy who told me this story of growing up in the 50s: He and some neighborhood boys (age about 10 or 11 at the time) got into a guy's car (cars weren't locked back then.) They found some condoms and thought they were balloons. They blew up the "balloons" and caused quite a stir in the neighborhood. Apparently, the car owner didn't use condoms (with his wife), and became the first divorced people the boys had ever known.

[@ilmj9]

I don’t think he sounds obsessed, quite cynical, actually. As every era, there were both good and bad things that he pointed out

[@billcarrig9434]

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

[@jr4062]

You always think of all the opportunities of the 50’s, and how easier it was to purchase a home, car, etc., but you forget about how life was in general. Still, the control process continues to this day.

[@greenripper420]

I Greatly appreciate these. Thank You, please keep these goin'!!

[@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker]

Thank you Mike for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that KZbin is testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts. David Hoffman filmmaker

[@23ofSeptember]

I grew up in the 80s and 90s in a small town in Western Canada and I remember things being restrictive. For example, you couldn't hang out with kids who were younger than you were, like in a lower grade. You were only supposed to hang out with kids in the same grade. You were judged by what shoes you had on. If you didn't have Nike Airs then you were singled out. You had to wear Bugle Boys. If you listened to Country Music you were a made fun of. All kinds of things.

[@realmichaud]

yep, I grew up in rural Maine 70s, grade school in 80s and I can attest to what you are saying no Nikes or Levis you are out! lol, if you were poorer, your out!!! I turned 18 in 1991 and got out on my own by 93. We moved South in 90 and it was better yet different. But as far as I can tell by 90,91,92 the old rules went out the door and the openness of the 90s arrived. I remember the 80s as conformity, and the 90s as do what you want without much reprocussions.

[@Dempsey1873]

Nothings much changed then lmao

[@geraldineekhator5428]

This is like small-town life today. I had to go outside a small-town life to make a living and have things better for my family and myself. I had to go to a different country to find a husband because the husband material where I’m at was already taken. The small town people judge you and make life difficult. I can go to my hometown today and still be judged as a nothing because that is their mentality. Many people have moved and others have moved into the town but there is enough of the older generation that were there from my childhood to judge that I am a nothing no matter what I do. Although there are quite a few that say that I have made something of myself. I am just working on things for myself and my family and I don’t worry about what others think, but there are great many people that do worry about what others think and so that’s the crux of the matter. What he’s trying to say in the 1950s is that it was more congested and people had it easier to put restrictions on the children’s lifestyle. Because my mother grew up in the 40s and 50s and she and my uncles explained about the rigid rules during that time. We still have some rigid rules but they’re nothing like at that time. Although at that time children did have more running about freedom and such than they do in this current day and age. I had more freedom as a child for running around and playing than the children in this day and age. In order to give my children bigger freedom for their playing and growing up; I had to take them out to the family farm. Many people do not have family farms for children to run around and be themselves. So they grow up in these little bubbles of where they can’t be free but they can be free. When my grandmothers grew up the children were supposed to be seen but not heard. The women had to be in the house doing the work and the men out in the field. But my grandma on my dad’s side would be out in the field helping her dad, because she was daddy‘s girl. My grandmas would let their kids be kids and try to not dictate them so much. They have seen how people would bring their kids up with such a rigid rules and the kids hated it and were in misery. The other kids would come to my families place to get a little bit of freedom and to understand that their parents were only doing the best that they thought they could do. Many of the kids thanked my family for giving them that advice and for helping them to have a little freedom away from all the strictness because some parents can be extremely strict where the child ends up killing themselves because they can’t take it anymore. That’s happened in the past many times. It’s not that the parents didn’t love them enough it’s just because the children couldn’t take what the world dishes out. You see that even today where children are killing themselves now for other reasons but it boils down to the restrictions of the world.

[@alamooji3716]

He reminds me of Mr. Wheeler from stranger things

[@justme6591]

Thanks for your interesting time capsules!

[@R33fth3b33f]

I wonder what an outcast of the 50s would think now? All the nerds noticing the unwritten rules and contemplating on if they should use them and whatnot

[@info781]

He is talking about a particular socio-economic status. He is a professor after all and probably had parents like that. As late as 1940, less than half of all American students graduated from high school. You could join a company and work your way up or just work at a job or do a trade. In the 50's maybe 10% attended college. In the early 60's , it was probably like 15%.

[@reversepolarity8981]

This is so enlightening. I was adopted by a boomer with paranoid schizophrenia, who I've always known has an almost morbid fixation on the 1950's lifestyle and rigid rules. But hearing this man explain the decade really shed new light on how those rules weave into her mental disorder, to the point where it seems to have played a role in exasperating it. Especially when he gets into the "value of a dollar" double standard, the constantly being watched by authority figures for stepping a toe out of line, and the whole "you are the center of the universe" but don't do anything at all attitude. Put that way, it makes sense of that aspect of her neuroses. And on that note, I've always seen the parallels of thought in ultra conservative thinking vs. the "reasoning" that leads to schizophrenic delusions, so I refer to the far right as institutionalized schizophrenia. Honestly, I think that term would apply to the 1950's mindset as well.

[@Swinbad]

Basically, you were asked to be a responsible kid growing up, and then a responsible adult. Have a good job, get married, raise a family, live a decent life and help others. And this is supposed to be bad?

[@leandrapurvis2024]

I think that’s an oversimplified version of what he said throughout this video. I think there’s a difference between the constrictions he talks about here, versus being a good, responsible person.

[@zachary_newsom]

Well I'll tell you it's certainly not for everyone, proven by the counter-culture that proceeded it.

[@DinosaurKale]

He didn’t say anything about being “asked”. Repression is not responsibility, and is probably a precursor to irresponsibility. The 50’s lead to the 60’s.

[@Swinbad]

@@DinosaurKale I am not sure being taught to exercise self-control and contribute positively to a free society really constitutes "repression." Human beings are more than their appetites, and understanding how to rightly govern them is hardly a slavery.

[@Swinbad]

@@archenema6792 Well, I would understand that to mean that a man and woman should get married and enjoy a life-long monogamous sexual relationship. That's good for them, for their children, and for society more generally. If you want to have sex with whomever you want without that commitment, or satisfy your passions in other ways, I think the personal, familial, and societal effects are pretty obvious. You wouldn't be "laughing you --- off" if you had to help and work with kids born in broken homes, without fathers or mothers because those who produced them didn't understand how to rightly govern their passions in the context of a committed married relationship. Most of what is wrong with our society can be traced to a breakdown of the family that largely began with the sexual "liberation" of the 1960s.

[@ihatetheworld90]

Things haven’t changed very much.

[@markm.9188]

How haven't they changed

[@johnblaze6269]

Lol where do you live?

[@bperez8656]

Much different now But the state and media still control the way families think

[@jacksobrooks]

Things have changed so dramatically. It’s not the same country at all.

[@BrianMax]

If you wore yellow on Thursday, it meant you were gay? That's insane.

[@LeaderOfTheRedNinjas]

That's what kids do though. They make arbitrary rules to victimise other kid based on. It's not something unique to the 50s at all, I remember similar things being a primary school aged child in the 90s. It's probably a comforting way to confirm a sense of belonging to a group amongst those who are 'in', and also an outlet for children's natural sense of cruelty.

[@rethastoneking4680]

Brian Max it was purple on Thursday where I went to school ...yep true..

[@thegoodlydragon7452]

I grew up in the early 2000s and graduated high school in 2011, so much more recent times. When I was a kid wearing an earring on your left ear meant you were gay. I think kids everywhere do something like this.

[@seeingimages]

That guy is talking about some weird custom/belief among teenagers at his high school NOT throughout all of the U.S.

[@user-hr3tx6uu9o]

When my parents bought our first house high up on a hill, my mom was the only one who worked. Honestly most stay at home moms reminded me of The Stepford Wives. They were all so alike. I thought they were old but looking back they had to be in their thirties like my mom was. I was 9 then and 11 in the 7th grade but sadly we moved when I was 12. And we moved back to the city where my parents and I'd lived before. It was a cultural shock.

[@malgremor85]

The youth commercial market actually started in the 1920's, when Madison Ave. created an entirely new marketing demographic in the "teenager"...a term that they invented. This was the beginning of a series of youth subcultures which have been evolving since then. It's all about selling them stuff, regardless of the negative impact on society.

[@helloSanders]

Is it that when you use social pressure instead of understanding to make children behave, it can keep them confused and unhappy? Did some families lean on using society to raise kids, since it was lesser effort? It might be most challenging and effective for parents to understand their own values enough to explain them, and then taking time to express it to children who may need differing explanations. It seems like a community that fell into a societal trap, where too many people are taking psychological shortcuts. Insightful to watch, thank you for sharing.

[@donjuan2421]

Very interesting and thought provoking video.. As a child growing up in the 70's and 80's, this sounded strange but familiar at the same time.. Some of the rules he mentioned still lingered around.. Today, there basically are none..

[@delilahhart4398]

I find it interesting that he describes there being a sense of impending doom among high schoolers during the 50s. I graduated from high school in 1992, and we were always told about the many possibilities that awaited us.

[@darger3]

Would love to see the continuation of this series.

[@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker]

Search the words "making sense of" on my KZbin channel and you will find many clips from my television series with sections on the 1950s suburbia. David Hoffman filmmaker

[@darger3]

Oh, this is excellent Well done David

[@Len124]

Aside for the more societal concerns, like homophobia and communism, this guy sounds like he might be mixing up adolescence with the 50s, a time when he happened to be an adolescent. His description sounds like today, except that culture isn't confined to high school, but is in everyone's pocket constantly, so someone can compare their lives or status to others instantly. He happened to age out of that culture into adulthood, but he'd probably recognize a lot in today's youth culture, aside from the particular, arbitrary trends.

[@robinluich6626]

Your life was over? Marriage and children are the most beautiful part of my life. Its love,unity, and happiness. My wonderful husband and I are more blessed than any career ,trip or possessions could offer. This life isnt about how much money and things you can acquire! Decency,integrity, family,friends,and human bonding are the greatest blessings on this earth besides sharing the Lords word.

[@thatwasprettyneat]

i wish my mom were still around so i could show this to her. i think she'd relate to it quite a bit. the whole thing with having to do things a certain way and people taking things so seriously that seem so silly now.

[@-Gorbi-]

People live till they’re 65-70 but 1960’s society convinced people high school were the best times of their lives. So delusional

[@setherin4607]

Ppl live until 80

[@DarylB1]

Guy in the video is now 85

[@chapero1]

Then everybody went out and mixed with bad people in the 60's! Great analysis, fantastic material as usual David Hoffman.

[@delilahhart4398]

I was in high school during the late 80s and early 90s. He mentions that people were discouraged from standing out during the 50s. In my day, it was great to stand out in some ways, but not others. If you were an amazing athlete, were conventionally attractive, or belonged to a prominent family in town, life was great. If you were none of the above, it wasn't so great. If you were lucky, you were neither popular nor unpopular, but you had some good friends. If you were unattractive or had learning or social deficits, your life could be made torturous. I had then-undiagnosed ADHD and autism, and I don't have many fond memories of high school.

[@allypoum]

Whether consciously or not, this is some badass dialectical materialism my comrades.

[@johnlamontagne9678]

I was thinking the exact same thing. Superb material analysis of the social conditions of the 50s. The suburbs were/are an interesting ecosystem

[@ethanwashoe5868]

Did you hear the part where he talked about how cheap cars and houses were? These were social problems in the 50s not economic, but I’m sure it was way better in the Soviet Union comrade!

[@PC.NickRowan]

Very cool video, greatful to have these.

[@AcesAndNates]

This guy had an amazing sense of awareness

[@songbirdforjesus2381]

You must remember that the parents of the people who raised us in the 50s had gone through the Great Depression where food and jobs were scarce people were scared and didn't know what the future held. Then came World War II and our parents sent their dads off to war, many not returning and having to go to work at a young age to help support the family. I was born in 1951 and my mother waited home for her father at War, while her mother stayed home because her dad was an officer, a captain of a ship in the Navy, and could afford to be there with the kids. Money was still tight for poor people. Jobs were few initially. That's why they worked so hard so that their children would never face another depression like they did. And they wanted to have the mother and father at home raising the children. Since World War 1 this never was possible. I do not blame them for wanting a good life for their family. And honestly the generations before my parents were equally as repressed if not more. I think more should be done with looking at the World War II generation and how the war destroyed family life. But it was a righteous War. And then not long after came the Korean War. The Communist were gobbling up countries and Americans felt desperately sorry for them. So the Korean War was somewhat just. By the time the Vietnam war came around my generation was privy to all the stories of the Depression and World War II then the Korean War. We had had enough of Wars destroying our families. Our friends were dying our brothers were dying and we wanted to fight for them and to finally stop the idea that America had to keep giving up their sons and daughters for the evils of the rest of the world that will go on forever. Then you had all kinds of other evil crap infiltrating the souls and minds of my generation perpetrated on us by the wackos of the previous generation. I guess my generation went ballistic. Maybe they absorbed all of the evils from the past hundred years and their souls had had enough they got whacked out themselves. I hated the 50s but I hated the 60's even more. People exploited each other for their own ends and means. It wasn't all that free. It was people acting out their basest instincts like unreasoning animals. So many people were hurt and have scars from that era. Wild isn't good. Lack of self-control isn't good. People were calling evil good and good evil. A burnout generation finally trying to get back to some sense of goodness, they became more materialistic than their parents ever were. Rebellion does that. Did some good come out of that era? Of course, many wonderful things. But a Pandora's Box was opened and can never be shut. The extreme Rebellion became demonic in some areas. Many people say it was a spiritual darkness that came over Nazi Germany and that the people seemed like in a trance. If that is true I will say the same thing about my generation. It was a spiritual stupor and many never recovered. I know many people that never came back from LSD trips and were in the hospital. Unchecked venereal disease, babies raised by their mothers if they were lucky. Millions of lives cut short by abortion. I took the birth control pill when I was married and developed tumors because I was the experimental generation and was given dosages 20 times what they give people today. Luckily they were benign and were cut out. Divorce exploded and multiple marriages two and three times were the norm if you got married at all. Drug use became the norm. Sexual deviancy became rampant. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. I wish I never was born at that time in history. But that was my lot in life and I have learned since my mid-20s and being married to my high-school sweetheart for 51 years that we are a miracle only through the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ to whom we devoted Our Lives during the Jesus Movement of the late 60s and 70s, which I initially heard about on the Armed Forces Radio while in Germany with my husband who was in the Army and luckily was not sent to Vietnam. He was arrested for doing drugs and selling drugs while on guard Duty add a nuclear post. We finally came back to the States, my brother asked me to go to church and the rest is history, because by then my husband and I were separated. The rest of our lives before that was a typical 60s mess. So sorry to the Next Generation, hoping that you learned many lessons from our mistakes and don't continue doing the same things, because each generation has to answer for itself.

[@cashinn7490]

Well said but damn...shoulda praphrased lol

[@ay613]

Do u believe the Gospel. Alone saves?

[@missGolightly420]

Very interesting. Boy how times have changed. My generation has a lot more freedom in many ways.

[@jamesrobiscoe1174]

And freedom requires responsibility.

[@missGolightly420]

@@jamesrobiscoe1174 It definitely does.

[@nathandenault3136]

Too much!

[@bperez8656]

Personal responsibility needs to increase in times like these and its declining

[@dhutch71]

The rigid "rules" of the conformist 1950s to early 1960s gave way to the "rebellion" and independence of the post-1963 Sixties.

[@PhatLvis]

Indeed, this man is quite insightful and articulate. Paints a clear - if subjective - picture.

[@marclove1159]

I was born in 1951, so my life experience includes much of what is described in this video. Most of it rings true, but I believe it would have been more or less so depending on the part of the country where you lived and whether you were raised in a big city, small town or rural setting.

[@thomasreiter2367]

These interviews are really interesting and valuable

[@LucasFernandez-fk8se]

If the 50s didn’t have racism Or homophobia then it would be paradise imo. I like the idea of everyone being safe and Christian and wholesome and families loving each other and people acting similarly and getting along

[@ictesting]

I don't think I have stressed enough how vital these all are. Thank you again!

[@fallon7616]

I was born in 1955 and went to Catholic school. Even though we wore uniforms shoe's and purse's we're a big deal. No dating until 16. Catholic girls rebelled 💯 Great video, David 💕

[@acastrohowell]

And now society is broken, no standards, no morality

[@harrisp584]

I miss high school. Life was simple. I liked my subwoofer my bmx bike and my girlfriend. Racism didn't exist and I wasn't cursed with the ability to think out my actions.

[@easterislandstatues9176]

Always enjoy your uploads, thank you for providing this interview

[@ddkz9]

First! Another great video David thanks for posting.

[@oisinquinn9469]

Really well developed retrospective honest reflection.

[@jacksobrooks]

He really thought more about his past than many people think of anything.

[@pbayer773]

I was born in 1952 but my feeling about growing up was nothing like what this man says...I had no pressure at all compared to today. My upbringing was fun, safe, lots of friends, freedom, joy. Laughter, playing outside. Is this guy an alien from another planet. He is just a depressed, period. I didn't know what a gay person meant, I had a girlfriend named Gay and she was sweet. Where did this man come from. Look at him, he is still depressed and negative!!!! What an idiot!!! I grew up in the very best of times ....wish I could go back to the 50, 60 and 70s.

[@neilpuckett359]

Born in 55 had a great childhood.

[@jchow5966]

This is fascinating. Thank you!!!

[@AnnabelleJARankin]

This has to be American life - life in England was not like this description. We were really free - still miss that.

[@ryanholloway6078]

Annabelle Rankin what year were you born?

[@AnnabelleJARankin]

1954! @@ryanholloway6078

[@BartAnderson_writer]

The "Up" series charting the course of a collection of Brit kids from the 50s is fascinating. Shows the rigid class system breaking down somewhat over time, but still determining people's destinies.

[@AnnabelleJARankin]

Will seek it out @@BartAnderson_writer - gotta say though, the class system in England being termed 'rigid' does not convey the truth about the British: they are not by nature such social climbers and dollar-chasers as as the Yanks!

[@BartAnderson_writer]

Thanks, @@AnnabelleJARankin. Yes, two different systems, each with its advantages and disadvantages. The UK made a great impression on me when I spent months living there in 70s and early 80s. As an outsider, I wasn't especially constricted by class structure, but I observed it. I agree, it was rather comfortable.

[@elleh3495]

As a human born in the middle 1970s, I am speechless at how much control children have i their own parenting and family issues. I don't know if this is to their advantage or not; it had become a world where family values and adult authority have no context or meaning anymore. This, because of how we now organize ourselves as humans, has created uncertaintly, chaos, depression and burn-out in many of the youth. But having standards and peer pressure so tremendous that children cannot even be children, is also a situation that unfortuntely leads to the exact same consequences of depression, burn-out etc. There seems to be a pattern in this behavior the more mechanized and industrial life became for humans.

[@nationstate]

11:10 went to high school in the late 2000’s and was never told even once about “the value of money”

[@thotpatroller7892]

Grandad posts the best videos

[@cleftlannights2881]

Wow that headline doesn't really fit the video. Didn't seem obsessed at all just be grew up there any new stuff about it he's obviously being it interviewed probably 30 Years Ago by the quality of the film or even longer.

[@Bigmommafluffy]

I graduated in 1998. D.A.R.E. didn't help us. My friends are dying at a rate I didn't ever think would happen at my age. Opiate addiction is killing my generation: Gen X, and elder Millennials.

[@janethockey9070]

Miss Kimberly Increased awareness about drugs

[@bperez8656]

Your generation was fucked the hardest by these 1950s psychopaths who allowed themselves to be manipulated by the Tv and media and psychologically abused y’all into a corner both at the home and in the economy.

[@jchow5966]

I dont think he is obsessed. He is well spoken , analytical & very right on.

[@mosess880]

Thanks !

[@gscd2881]

Jesus Christ, boomers are the worst. The original spoiled generation. “You got married and your life was over”. They didn’t know what they had.

[@inkey2]

I wasn't spoiled. Like many of my generation my parents grew up in poverty that could not be imagined today. The 1918 Flu pandemic, the great depression, ww2, and being raised by a combat disabled father. Parents who lived through that were very tough on their children.....strict.....penny pinching, and having a father who had severe post traumatic stress disorder from combat, bad tempered, heavy drinkers.......like my dad. This was very common. My parents would not give me a cent because of their great depression experience. My dad always told me if you want something go out and get a job and buy it. So I started working part time at 13 years old. My boomer tale is quite common of having WW2 parents

[@adgp8945]

K D, I think you literally completely missed the point

[@igormarinkovic1531]

all those values back then were good !!!! today is the big problem. Society needs limits to stay good. Look at you today. Disaster.

[@adgp8945]

@@igormarinkovic1531 back to the Kremlin you go, Komrade.

[@lisah8438]

If you did get married for the wrong reasons you life is over. Do you marry because you are expected too or are you getting married because you genuinely want to be with someone the rest of your life.

[@agingmillennialmainer]

This sounds like my 90s rural upbringing. Down to the colored shirt thing.

[@robertlong4363]

“Do what you will” Crowley.. A fuckin mad world I say indeed

[@alwayslatesorry5202]

I was born in late 50s with fun Grandparents & very little structure. I felt No pressure .

[@Theshow-zl4fd]

I love your Chanel

[@A9POLO]

And the US talks about China being a communist state. He’s described a fair amount of authoritarianism

[@whiskeyshot562]

Repression can mean different things. The 21st century has its own forms of repression that might not seem similar to those of the 1950s. Yes, today people can wear anything, talk about socialism and communism, openly have interracial and same-sex relationships, etc, but people also enjoy far worse economic prospects. Housing prices, debt, healthcare costs, widening wealth inequalities, stagnant incomes, and the unfolding of the climate crisis--each constrict individual freedoms in ways that are quite profound. We're all subject to the whims of the global market without a strong government to support us, susceptible to the dictates of private employers and wealthy people. It's a colorful era, but I wouldn't call it free.

[@cartwrightworm1317]

I had older parents when I was a teenager in the 90s. Their attitudes make much more sense after seeing these documentaries. They were appalled that so many men in my senior year high school yearbook didn’t wear suits and ties. They wanted to know how their parents let them get away with it.

[@GUAMANIANable]

I feel sorry for this guy. The fifties were great. I was there. We had a lot of fun.

[@CareyNoblePugh]

This was going on in the 1970's and 80's too. At least the world I came from.

[@CareyNoblePugh]

@B.T.W 01 No, I liked the way I grew up!

[@vjr5261]

I am a product of the 50s idealism. My mom graduated from high school in 57 and ran away to hippie California. I was born in 60.