Dealing with difficult people. NLP skills with Master Trainer in NLP Phil Parker

Phil Parker - MIND BODY CONNECTION expert.
Brilliant and simple techniques for how to deal with those kinds of people who seem to make life tricky... more on how to train in more NLP skills online or in-person with Phil at www.philparker...
UPDATE: In this video, Phil talks about the Core Skills course - this has been renamed the NLP Life Skills course, you can find out more in the link above. Our courses all take place live online and through distance learning - we don't currently offer face to face options in London

[@naturahealingtherapies]

Just brilliant! So simple and yet so effective. Thank you for your generosity in sharing these techniques. I also loved the way you explained them, so easy to understand and apply. Thank you!

[@beebennett2545]

Hi Phil. This is another great trick. Since learning NLP some years ago I rarely let people get to me and have vastly improved relationships. However, I just used this bit o mental gymnastics on my ex husband. I never see him but (23 years on!) he still exerts pressure on the kids and has told them many lies that I don't counter because my gorgeous family don't need to be ripped apart. The pressure is sometimes noticeable though so I shrunk him, moved him away and sent him right, left and behind me. I didn't like him behind me but wanted him gone from my consciousness so put him (happily with his new family) in a glass box and let him go off into the distance to my left. Feels good! Thanks for your brilliant re-caps.

[@debybeuscher7015]

Simple, quick techniques is the way to go for anybody! THANK YOU!!!

[@MicLitter]

This is funny, totally pictured my butthead manager as a tiny peanut person with a tiny chipmunk voice, made me laugh my anger off. Did the same with my other agitating coworkers & now I find them more amusing than annoying. Thanks!

[@jack63kids]

Neat! Tried it, even as listening to you talking, about a good friend who I have allowed to upset me the past couple of days. In perspective now. I feel quite differently towards her, more compassionate. My real problem is saying no without getting my ME to say no for me. Even now I am well I find myself saying 'I have to be careful' to people who aren't easily put off, as this has worked in the past. They find it harder to argue with chronic illness, especially one they don't understand. Didn't work with all people though and never made me feel better. It wasn't a good strategy then and it's a worse one now. I feel that this is a good start though to not being damaged by their insistence and demands. Thanks. Looking forward to the longer online course. One more thing I thought would be useful to graduates is to have drop-in clinics for graduates only. Just for a top-up. Some of us are still 'addicts' to our past complaints and could do with some re-enforcement. Maybe once a month for no more than an hour or so. And not expensive, so people would be able to afford to come back.

[@DrPhilParker]

Glad you liked ti, and yes we are looking at additional ways to support people - what do you think of on line group sessions...cuts down on travel, room hire etc?

[@jack63kids]

+Phil Parker How did I miss this! Just clearing out my account as changing email addresses, most reluctantly. Yep, absolutely. Anything that can cut down on time and expense for people. Nothing quite matches face-to-face though and I'd advocate for 'drop-ins' to boost our resolve-if someone graduates from courses run by one franchise holder, it would be good if they can attend someone else's drop-in wherever in the country. Weight-Watchers works as people get the regular support and monitoring that they find it hard to sustain on their own. Nothing like making us visible and accountable.

[@ismaielwaheed4300]

Love the way you teach. Keep it up. Cheers

[@lynatkins547]

Shared, I love this technique and use it for clients for all sorts of things that bother them.

[@DrPhilParker]

Thanks for sharing it Lyn

[@chloelove4952]

Thanks Phil, it is so weird this video popped up in my email just as I was thinking about the negative person! It really helped me, like you said, in feeling what they say is not so important. I have a question - it is my friend's husband who has been negative about my changes and skeptical about ME existing and when I see this person in my mind they are in their house where I only ever see them, so when I shrink and move them, is that keeping on imagining them there or in my environment? P.S. I have made so many positive changes since I did LP - it is the only thing that has helped me and I am so grateful!

[@CallMeMissCat]

Thank you soo much for the valuable exercise!

[@lifebydesignonedayatatime5146]

Thank you. I will try this!

[@mikakrstic]

You are a beautiful human. Very free and loving in energy. Also amazingly simple in explaining and fluid in talking. Thank you brother.

[@jessicavitrouk194]

Thanks Phil! This is so simple and easy! Am looking forward to more.

[@TheRagbags1]

I’m struggling with this one but I like this analogy .

[@brendacameron5276]

Brilliantly and simply explained Phil.

[@DrPhilParker]

Thanks Brenda

[@hildemansson9162]

Great tips before summer holiday and family members who are…

[@lizmagee4016]

Very interesting . Worth trying/doing

[@escapeyourchains5730]

This feel amazingly effective. I can feel it making a difference. Unfortunately there is a resistence in me. For example with one person who I love, I didn't want to have them "so insignificant" as it made them being so far away - so they didn't stay where I put them. With the other person, who I would be happy to not have in my life, I felt unnerved because what they have some control over certain things in my life. Any suggestions welcome! Thanks

[@DrPhilParker]

Thanks for your comments- this technique is great for simple things like an annoying work mate... as you note it can get more complex if it's someone you love- in this case you may want to put them 'over there' temporarily...or it may signal some deeper work is needed-( this is just youtube after all :)) ) It can also show up other issues such as you mention with the 'other person' that would benefit from resolving- but again this beyond a simple youtube vid. This audio might be very helpful for you- it's focused on health but the techniques apply for relationships too. or see one of the team for some support info @ philparker.org

[@fullname7054]

@@DrPhilParker thanks very much. What audio?

[@DrPhilParker]

@@fullname7054 sorry, the link got lost :). www.philparker.org/product/use-your-placebo-nlp-tools-for-health

[@janinestreeter2477]

Hi Phil can I have link to part 1 please on changing your future, 😅

[@DrPhilParker]

I think the one you want is this one kzbin.info/www/bejne/oHbWk6aqo7yiaLs

[@trishcovich1923]

Brilliant

[@DrPhilParker]

Thanks Trish

[@DraGon-ge6po]

Well I instantly started giggling at the thought of a difficult person being the size of a peanut & talking in a tiny voice so that's a good start!

[@DrPhilParker]

perfect :)

[@LifeAfterPTSD]

I definitely need more help with this. I'm dealing with a long-term bullying problem (20 years) with my brother and no matter how many times I tell him to get the h3ll out of my life, he won't leave me alone, even going as far as to cyberstalk me around the Internet, so if I say something he doesn't like about our abusive family, he pops up to harass me. He did so recently when he called the co-host of my Internet show, claiming I had mental problems and I lied about my experiences in our family. I'm done. I want him permanently out of my life and I want to stop the obsessive thinking I experience every time he violates my boundaries. Can NLP help me? And if so, how?

[@DrPhilParker]

+End All Wars By Ending The War Within Hi there...it can, although your situation is a little more complex than the video was designed for... try the techniques and see how far that gets you. As you say its about setting boundaries and finding ways to stay calm even when he pushes them (as, unfortunately he probably will). Additionally I'd recommend the NLP podcasts on iTunes

[@LifeAfterPTSD]

+Phil Parker In the wake of my post, I received a coupe of counselling sessions from an NLP coach in Australia. Using timeline therapy, we were actually able to dissolve the bullying energy inside me. As I'm sure you can imagine, Im a much different person now. Thanks very much for responding to my post.

[@esperanzacevallos2177]

I believe in it

[@laneymae]

I would like to use this on my mom but i'm finding it difficult because i still feel beholden to her. I feel a lot of guilt and shame that i just can't shake, and making her small and far away feels disrespectful. I would appreciate some direction on what steps to use to get through this.

[@DrPhilParker]

Hi there - thanks for your comment. These important reactions show up some other patterns that would be great to resolve. As these feelings are quite complex and difficult to hold by yourself, I'd recommend working with an experienced practitioner. Do email us for suggestions [e-mail]

[@Star5dg]

Been doing Mickel therapy (similar to reverse therapy) but only getting marginal improvement. Really interested in LP but my cfs is caused by lyme so really don't know if LP would help

[@DrPhilParker]

Hi David, we've had similar success with Lyme, both sero-positive and negative

[@Star5dg]

@@DrPhilParker thanks for the reply. Good to hear it can potentially help lyme patience. Are you aware of the differences between Mickel therapy and LP? Reason I ask is I've spent alot of money doing Mickel for 10 months and although it's helped me put in place healthy boundaries, applying the keys, listening to my body and dealing with emotions...i still haven't recovered. I've made some progress but still unable to work

[@DrPhilParker]

@@Star5dg Hi David I'm not an expert on Mickel Tx but the approach seems quite different. Our focus is on how you can directly influence your physiology, especially your immune and neuro-endocrine system using your brain. This paper might help jep.ro/images/pdf/cuprins_reviste/82_art_2.pdf