Shoot Your Shot ft. Jay Barnett & Essence Atkins | Dear Future Wifey S4 E401

[@candicane1]

I was not ready for him to literally shoot his shot on camera. Lawd. Bless his heart.

[@cloversmithbent9729]

@candicane1 me too😅 olordt🤦🏾‍♀️ I listened so attentively….lovvve his vulnerability.

[@monicasaffold9405]

so are we gonna just skate pass the fact that Essence is almost 50, wow !!!!!!!! she's absolutely beautiful and doesn't look a day over 25.

[@susan8576]

What??? Now I'm in shock!!!😨😨😨😨 she is so beautiful

[@tarahines2381]

I did not know!! She is beautiful‼️

[@latasha8581]

I agree

[@claudettevt7400]

🔥🙏❤️❤️❤️

[@reesycasi]

Was thinking the same thing!

[@KingJayBarnett]

My brother Laterras, as always man I'm grateful for your courage to openly share your journey with the world. Thank you for the opportunity to be a part, love you brother. And Essence always bring such an elegant and broad perspective on life experiences. I enjoyed the episode man. Cheers to the best podcast...

[@DearFutureWifey]

Thank you for being a willing vessel to share this space.

[@raeliciamorris900]

🤨😂🤨🤨😍 I was

[@thequeenofresources]

@@DearFutureWifey Laterris I don't know you brother. But, hear some words of wisdom. Before you shoot your shot next time do this. 1. First let the young lady know that the conversation is being recorded. 2. Ask her what type of men does she usually dating? while she is describing him see if she is describing you? 3. Ask her what type of man does she desire to be married too? You will know right away if she is describing you. 4. Then tell her your reason for asking her those questions is because you are interested in dating her (gathering data) with the intention of marriage. Note: Every women knows what type of man she wants to be married too. Just like men know what type.of women they want to be married too. Be blessed and be safe out there. Sister Keshia

[@letsbefruitful5457]

@@thequeenofresources great advice!

[@kellyamouzou7278]

Just Thank You Jay for your spiritually ordered input in this conversation. The 3 of you gave me increased Hope, Confirmation that I am on the right path and deep Gratitudr for the Work God has been doing on me on my journey to my God ordained Husband. Thank You and bless you on your own journey. Joy

[@theprocessforummediagroup3229]

Thank you Essence for allowing the phone conversation to be aired to demonstrate to women how important it is to deliver delicate information to a man with grace, class and style so that he walks away empowered and not injured - something women of this age are so notorious for doing...being intentional in their pursuit to injure and not uplift. ✌🏽♥️🙏🏽

[@DearFutureWifey]

And that's my I swallowed my EGO (Edging God Out) and posted this

[@yolandawilliams236]

@ the process forum media group...well said!

[@yolandawilliams236]

@ Latererras..you my friend already have the everlasting love of God. Even if you don't find her in this lifetime..the FATHER is well pleased!

[@teejaybee9]

The problem is that she didn't know it was going to air, initially. Immediately, for me, that would take away from the authenticity of the conversation. She stated that she had no idea that she was being recorded. She applauded him for his vulnerability but she made it clear that deception existed on his part. He recorded a private conversation and decided to make it public. She protected him in his vulnerable moment but he took a moment and made her vulnerable.

[@RDCFemmes]

@@teejaybee9 thank you. I got tired of protecting the ego of men whose sole intentions was to use and abuse me. I told them the truth about themselves and the truth hurts. Now if they have any sense, that should be a clue to work on themselves and be better for the next woman. Not stroke their ego and make them feel good when they are not good man.

[@Harykeh]

Essence is the wisdom God described in Proverbs. This woman is wise and definitely speaks to Jesus. Thank you for teaching us how it should be done.

[@audaciousenuf8606]

I love how she broke down the help me and emotions. Teach sister Essence

[@duduetsangphatsimokoko9519]

Essence Atkins, "...I'm used to operating without a covering." I felt that. God bless her 🙏🏽🙏🏽 love her ❤️

[@kanikaevans4284]

I so relate with her.

[@latasha8581]

Oh wow! I felt that as well when she said that

[@AllThingsSoul]

But...us ladies have to allow a man to "cover us" so he feels needed in our lives for the things that money can't buy. Let him open the door for you, pull out your chair, walk closest to the street, you can even let him order your meal for you sometimes. Go sit on his lap when you need a hug. Let that man know what you need him for!

[@shilliard1888]

When I say she is the translator..whew!!

[@ajordan1847]

"To be known and seen by one." -Essence Atkins Whew!!!🙏❤🙏🙏🙏 Quote worthy. 🙏

[@yolandawilliams236]

Definitely a tweetable moment!

[@rehanna6594]

​@@athleticWorld1849 She is.

[@purpledancerbmw5279]

Amen, truly! That's what we all search for....... Finish my sentences day nab it! 👀👋

[@purpledancerbmw5279]

Day not day, spell check finishing my sentences all wrong.

[@purpledancerbmw5279]

One more again DAG!!!!

[@BreenyLee]

This episode was IT! Especially love the part about being SEEN for who you are and not what you do ♥️

[@magneticaims]

Breeny! Good to know you watch this too. I watch you sometimes as well.

[@AngieeShipps]

Love this podcast. A few notes I have taken from this pod : - Be open to a organic friendship before considering being in a relationship with someone. - Listen to yourself and have discernment before continuing a romantic interaction. - Both men and women need a safe and secure place to be human and imperfect. - A relationship requires selfless and sacrifice. - A woman is called to be helpful to man. - Be open to rejection and face it with confidence. - Stop looking for the outcome and look for the lesson. - As woman, be gracious and gentle in you expressing honesty. - Grow in the process and all things work together for the good.

[@justcallmenee]

I have so much respect for Essence for the way she spoke the truth in love to Latteras. That’s a hard thing to do, but it shows how much she cares for her friends.

[@noble604]

So much care and it was almost twice as long as this. I agree!

[@absolutetreasures6877]

I didn’t see that phone call coming, but the vulnerability, honestly and just y’all being grown was so real, and though I cringe, it was amazing because it shed a weight and an understanding that it’s okay on both sides, you shooting your shot and she being true to herself. It was indeed LIT.

[@KP_FruitsoftheSpirit]

Absolutely! God is getting him Ready Love these guys.❤️🙏🏽

[@Yukia76]

Yes

[@stephaniecollins9202]

Absolute Treasures I did!!! I knew he liked her like from the first video with her on it.

[@KP_FruitsoftheSpirit]

I love this comment and this whole platform. This just shows you how real and authentic living in your truth is.❤️🙏🏽

[@tanyaholland8542]

I was waiting for that phone call because I was always expecting and hoping with faith that they would connect on a higher intimate level.. however I wasn't expecting the disappointing outcome. But I pray they continue to stay connected and cheer their spiritual wisdom and Revelation with one another

[@sheenau3447]

I commend him for letting her know he see her. I love how she handled him with care.

[@lb1798]

That was special ...it didn't come out as rejection...but as love and concern.❤️

[@michellemorris9181]

That's so true! She was kind and sweet. He acknowledged his feelings!

[@Radience100]

I absolutely love to see the vulnerability of these 3 people!!!!!! How Essence said she desires to be excavated and known by one man and not be admired by many is powerful!

[@alvinjackson9685]

Wow! That was deep!

[@saywhatondat]

Absolutely !

[@vivianbelk6211]

Her and J clicks but won’t go for it

[@dynamiss12]

Essence's name is so befitting. The way she handled this was classy & full of grace. Some women would have put aside their convictions, just to "have a man" (a good one at that), but she was willing to stand in her truth & say that while you ARE an amazing man, you're just not HER amazing man & thus, she will continue to wait. I have so much respect for that. 👏🏾 for your courage Laterras. Loved watching ADULT men & women get it right.

[@noirefit5954]

I have really fallen in love with this show. And I hope Essence is brought back more. So much wisdom

[@LadyK09]

I always say this.... Don't pour out your soul to someone before you discern if they have the capacity to handle you in that moment👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@jvhunt6319]

Im 22 and told two ppl i liked them. They both handled me with care in their rejection but its been weird for me ever since to carry on like that didnt happen.

[@nikkyshamz2696]

@JV Hunt might be your ego coming into play especially cos you said they handled you kindly .

[@darisesanker6022]

​@jvhunt6319 some time has passed I'm curious about the two relationships since your sharing; update?

[@Blessed-ly6kr]

​​@@jvhunt6319give that to God. Don't let it hold your mind in bondage. Is just a trick of the devil. Cast your care upon the LORD, and... Leave it there. God bless your journey as you move forward. It doesn't mean that you were not good enough; maybe God just have something better for you.

[@SusanitaEfe]

It will be so amazing to watch an episode in the future with the 3 of you and your spouses.👌🏿 This episode was raw and lit!

[@nikkyshamz2696]

AMEN

[@acelove-un1ff]

Facts ... Love manifested🎉

[@Klove514]

Essence is right! I love a hand written note or a greeting card more than any handbag you could buy me. 💕

[@mo_love7089]

My love language !!!!

[@Thefitmarquee]

Y’all did I miss something- did her fiancé pay for the trip/ shows/ lodging ? Was that not enough as a present? I love creative gifts too but I’m sure after that feedback he could make it right with her.

[@tiffanyfields241]

Yes I love poems, notes and cards. It’s so thoughtful.

[@frannygochi]

"You can't want the PRESENCE of my body and then not want the PRESENCE of my soul"! Deep

[@dineoportiamagoro3212]

Very deep❤

[@grannysesebe9721]

Extremely deep ,and what would it take to gain all and loose your Soul .

[@Noirmariposa]

This is a much healthier talk format than some other popular shows on youtube/ social media.

[@DearFutureWifey]

Amen

[@garnet1178]

In my mind… Two big brothers and their little sister sitting on a couch having a discussion about love, marriage and relationships. I love it! 🖤💜

[@inspirationalempressoflove220]

She's actually close to 10 years older than both of them...though she looks like she could be younger...but I get your point. 👍

[@DrKellie247]

It looks like Essence is the little sister, but she's the big sister with the little brothers.

[@shons_homecooking]

except shes older then both of them lol

[@sharesereed8168]

Essence is like a spokesperson for everything in my head that i have a hard time finding my own words for ❤️

[@absolutetreasures6877]

I’m 💯 with Jay, I’m not shooting any shots, just like him, I want it to be organic. Just a hi to an organic conversation and maybe using discernment. That is my prayer. I’m so glad you all are back, Essence you are a friend in my head and Leterras, thank you, thank you. Pray we all find the love we’re hoping for and be the love for that individual. Again Jay is preaching, I don’t do social media. Let love happen organically and naturally.

[@MyMARI3]

She gave him hints in their last podcast that she only saw him as a friend. That was bold to shoot your shot on camera. I felt uncomfortable for her, but she handled herself well

[@shedagirl1726]

She was graceful with her response.

[@JoJoInHouston1982]

I completely agree.

[@dawneshiaellerbe6765]

yeah i felt very uncomfortable. She did great.

[@cassiebrunson1590]

I felt uncomfortable the whole podcast, when he titled it shoot your shoot😂.

[@allthingsash4303]

Same

[@EOOgunro]

This was a good episode! The "shoot your shot" moment was actually an eye opener on how to let someone down but still treat them with dignity and respect and still caring for their heart/feelings.

[@aminahdean7468]

Yes!

[@cims1ty640]

It’s curious to me that no one asked Essence how she felt regarding being recorded. The question was instead directed towards Jay. That was truly a vulnerable moment, I think, for both because there has to be a trust/ respect there to even have that conversation. Most people don’t assume they’re being recorded and certainly don’t expect to see it replayed in a public setting. Perhaps I’m missing it but I couldn’t help but notice her body language afterwards and wonder who was covering her in that moment.

[@toyajones2186]

Yess I would thought they would ask her but oh well

[@Nubiasquared]

Absolutely agree. She should’ve been told that she was going to be recorded but certainly not find out while in the middle of the interview. I’m disappointed that she wasn’t covered.

[@lydiaheelu2681]

Laterras mentioned in the podcast with Dee-1, and perhaps other episodes as, that he told Essence about it and she gave her him permission to share it publicly.

[@c.estmoi]

He did tell her. And she wanted him to use it on this pod. The original call happen from his previous episode with her season 3 ep. 300 i think.

[@cims1ty640]

@@lydiaheelu2681 okay didn’t know he told her. That’s good to know.

[@takeauthority30]

The biggest reason I stop dealing with men online was because there's a certain type of man who can't speak to women. That man needs to strengthens that muscle... The strength in leading and just being a man comes with having the confidence to just speak. There's a lot more to it but I pray men address their fears and insecurities so that more of us can meet.

[@jess_is]

THIS!

[@d.c.4706]

This comment right HERE!!!!!! Truth indeed!

[@kikib.4519]

I agree,most men don't know how to talk to women correctly and respectfully but most women are just justifying and accepting the disrespect.

[@womanofgod2948]

Two healed individuals who dealth with this in a mature, adult manner. I literally was holding my breath while he was 'shooting his shot' at Essence. She is a beautiful person, and it was done so gracefully. 🙌🏾💯 And for him to bring Essence back on the show and reveal to the public what he did, this is respect, honour and the power of Almighty God on a WHOLE DIFFERENT LEVEL!

[@DearFutureWifey]

It takes a healed woman like you to recognize everything you stated. Thank you for doing the work.

[@jenniferscottstanislaus9980]

Bravo Latteras. What you did by showing your exchange with Essence is so brave and beautiful and I thank you so much for showing somthing that is so personal to you both. There so many men that would be so afraid to show that type of vulnerablity and I appreciate you so much for it. You three are amazing human beings and may God bless you all exceeding, abundently, above all you can ask hope or think.

[@DearFutureWifey]

Thank you so much!

[@Yukia76]

Clutching my pearls moment for real 😳

[@edenise07]

Amen!

[@Selflovematters4life]

The beauty of relationships lies in interdependence. Knowing you have the capacity to do it on your own...but the gratitude of having a partner who says...you no longer have to...I got you.

[@j.o.y_aliba]

I was totally blushing when Latteras was speaking to Essence ☺️☺️😩😩😩 I totally covered my face…Wow that transparency😩😩 This is my best episode

[@zimkitastuurman6720]

I know right!

[@Bold4Christ]

Me too lol

[@karenmcgee1869]

Yessssss! So precious and endearing.

[@DearFutureWifey]

Me too! Lol.

[@karenmcgee1869]

@@DearFutureWifey that was sweet and honorable of you though. I admire that about you.

[@daintiip6905]

I would love to hear the testimony/journey from someone who has been single for a long time (10+ years) and does not get any attention. I’ve heard you say to some of your guests, “it’s not for lack of attention as you’re a beautiful woman”. But there are many singles who do not get any. That is an unique journey of faith in singleness because you are literally depending on God when NOTHING is happening.

[@elmobabe09]

This is good sis! I’d love to hear these stories as well!

[@kiam.4468]

I feel like God is intentional in that, bc the attention can be a distraction which can separate you from purpose. It's a reminder to shift the focus back to whose preparing you for what's to come. God isn't worried about time, we are. He knows His word will not return to him void. We have to remember that 💞 and not grow weary.

[@daintiip6905]

@@kiam.4468 really really appreciate this!

[@daintiip6905]

@@elmobabe09 I’ve never heard or read about this angle yet.

[@womanofgod2948]

@@daintiip6905 Yesssss, I fall into the bracket of someone who has been single for 14+ years without getting attention and also not hearing from God. It can be very frustrating, but getting attention from the wrong person can derail you from your purpose. I would love to see more people with a testimony like mine

[@joyo2898]

I was so surprised to see Laterras being vulnerable and living LIT 🔥. So proud of you brother and you will soon meet your queen!

[@DearFutureWifey]

Thank you.

[@winfridahbanda5739]

This podcast has taught me to own my story and be intentional and purposeful about my healing and growth. I thank God for leading me here🙌

[@terrialvarez2788]

Wow it was so interesting to see single men and a woman. How we should view dating, the trauma and all the baggage that we bring if we don't get counseling we come so jacked up. Once we allow God to help us and heal and some of the pain and he helped us through the rest. Wow I was blessed to hear the maturity i agreed with you all. Wow keep up the good work.

[@siweskefile1705]

The way Essence looks at Jay, oh man

[@KingJayBarnett]

😳😳😳

[@siweskefile1705]

@@KingJayBarnett I'm just an observer Jay

[@alishaendre616]

I thought it was just me who noticed….

[@jeanettemontrose5246]

I thought it was just me 😂👀

[@roughpetals4061]

I said the same thing sis!

[@20_20Perspectives]

The investment is you put yourself out there!! Don’t look at the outcome; look for the lessons. Don’t anticipate the blow; run through it!! Lean into it; It’s not rejection but redirection!! My Lord, what a way to look at that & similar scenarios!! Thank you Jay!!

[@Therealgiantslayer]

Essence really gave a great example on how to keep a healthy male/female relationship and set healthy boundaries.

[@bsolwazi2712]

Laterras, your transparency and your willingness to be vulnerable speaks volumes of your integrity and character!!! May God grant you the very desires of your ❤

[@DearFutureWifey]

Thank you so much!

[@BabeRuthuk]

The reality is how you’ve approached Essence is how it should be done but we’ve deviated away from things so much. Kudos to you Laterras - I respect your boldness.

[@patriciascorner4686]

I'm so glad you had Essence back - such a lovely gentle soul! And she's right, we should let men know we don't feel the same way, and still empower them to shoot their shot at someone else. We never what a kind word / gesture can do in a person's life. "We become the answered prayer for the other." I felt that. I'm gonna borrow this ☺️.

[@lashungambrell6340]

This conversation is giving me life!! This the type of circle I want in my life. Meaningful, depth, sense of humor,, and iron sharpening conversations.

[@leticawiley8356]

If I didn’t know that this was real, I would have thought this was not real. God bless you Laterras for the work that you are doing in front of the world. I know that had to be very difficult in the moment but also know that this has to be God leading you. This is truly a ministry and I know your walk will not only inspire others but give them the space to be vulnerable as well. I am sure after this episode a lot of people are going to Jesus and their journal to release. This was heavy. Will continue to pray for this podcast, you and your future wifey.

[@DearFutureWifey]

Thank you for recognizing the gravity of this moment.

[@georginacreighton9740]

We, that have been with you on this journey all recognised it Laterras; and we are healing and growing together.

[@DearFutureWifey]

@@georginacreighton9740 Amen

[@winfridahbanda5739]

Agreed

[@twelch0215]

Amen and very well said!

[@darisesanker6022]

This was my first episode and I'm so honored and blessed by it. Thank you to you all❤

[@roea7846]

I love these 3 together. This is a real conversation that is needed. The authenticity of all 3 speaks volumes of the partner they will need in their lives. May God bless them with their soulmates.

[@trinawilliams4695]

This episode was the BEST ever. You have set a new standard in “ opening up” to others and being okay with the rejection. It has given us a new and clear understanding on the path we are supposed to be on as a future wifey. Thank you Sir for sharing. Thank you Essence for choosing class and dignity

[@DearFutureWifey]

Yes! Thank you!

[@TheWholeHealingHomie]

This right here should've been a master class or session at a heal conference. The transparency, spiritual maturity, &vulnerability. "I'm not responsible for the reciprocation, I'm responsible for the articulation". E.A. 🤞🏾🖤

[@DearFutureWifey]

Hey, that quote should be credited to the both of us. Lol. I started it and she finished it.

[@TheWholeHealingHomie]

@@DearFutureWifey Touchė you right. When I post you on my IG I got you 🤞🏾🤞🏾🤣 You know when Bishop Barnett, Evangelist E & Minister Laterras get together we liable get edges snatched, speak in tongues, & request CEUs🤣🤣🤣🤞🏾👏🏾👏🏾🙌🏾. Keep going!

[@cleaningcrew7310]

@s Perry That hit special!

[@msl5307]

"I'm used to not having a covering". WORD!

[@CoachHC]

This was good and love the humor from all of you all. Essence has a powerful anointing on her, when she speaks I get chills. Blessings and Abundance to you all great podcast.

[@DearFutureWifey]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@latoyabasden4725]

I completely feel this podcast! I am glad this was confirmation for me on multiple levels. The greatest lesson is the fact that in our singleness our Father reminds us of the need to be comfortable reaching out for someone else. In a marriage we need to be comfortable reaching to and for our partners like you reached to Essence! If we’re uncomfortable being vulnerable in that ability single, we most likely won’t be comfortable in marriage. I’m happy our Father is keeping us sharp by challenging us to practice it in our singleness.

[@MoZart1920]

I'm not done with the episode yet, but this is SO profound!!! So many things that I could comment on, but I felt like I needed to share one specific thing. While in college - fully saved and sanctified - I was "waiting" for my husband. It seemed like every young man that gave me any attention or whatever caused me to internally scream-pray to God the famous phrase: "is this my husband?". Long story short... when I finally laid that entire posture down an old elementary school friend walked back into my life. After hanging out and becoming friends, I began to feel a shift. Since I did NOT want to go back to my old posture, I prayed and fasted for God to give me clarity. I did not want to feel anything if this person was not my husband. I believe on day 3 of my fast, I CLEARLY heard the Holy Spirit say that my friend was the one. The "click" was real; BUT, I cried tears of "not joy"... I felt a heaviness that day. It made no sense to me UNTIL 10 years into our marriage this year. To love and respect him as his wife has required more of me than I could have ever imagined! I have that moment as reference whenever it feels impossible. I KNOW that I sought the Lord and the "click" is there. However, this journey has been heavy and I believe that ONLY I could cover him the way that I have. I still love him even in his very human moments. I hope that this piece of my testimony helps someone. #OrdainedMarriage #ThereIsAClick #LiterallyMadeForHim #YouWillKnow

[@KeepHealingSis]

Your raw transparency is refreshing and simultaneously healing for so many. The part of this episode that truly resonated with me was when Jay said, “You can’t have the presence of my body and then not have the presence of my soul.” And collectively you all said ... “Because my soul is my shortcomings, my emotions, my responses, my triggers … it contains all the things I’m still healing from.” I’m journaling that part and will meditate on it to go deeper within my own healing. So when I say you’re setting the captives free, I truly mean that. A continuous thank you for sharing your journey, most especially the uncomfortable parts. 🙏🏾

[@20_20Perspectives]

A mature and transparent conversation!! There are so many nuggets in this one. Thank you Laterras for sharing what shooting your shot looks like and thank you Essence for caring enough about your friend to respond honestly. At first I thought he was role playing. 🤗

[@twelch0215]

Right, I did too!

[@chaniawillow]

This episode got real after the call footage. I applaud you Laterras for shooting your shot and sharing it with us. I have learned from this to graciously appreciate affection and be honest even when I don't feel the same way. This was an important lesson for us out here. Essence was loving and exhibited pure class. Jay, thank you for being a neutralizing presence and sharing your wisdom with us.

[@tdavenport7539]

Your vulnerability was beautiful. Thank you for sharing. Essence, thank you for giving us a great reference of how to nuture our relationships with love, truth and compassion. Great episode.

[@afrikurl]

I thought it was creepy to record the conversation without her knowing it at first but when he explained it, I thought his intentions were kinda sweet. He’s a filmmaker. He captures special moments and tells the story through film. He wanted to record the moment, just in case she was wifey. They would have that moment to look back on.

[@DearFutureWifey]

Thank you for understanding. You get it!

That phone call had me glued to my chair. I'm taking notes from both sides, you guys handled it with grace and maturity.

[@thyrajoseph2720]

There's so much to unpack in this episode! But I'll just comment on Essence's response to Laterras. I liked how she took care in saying she wasn't interested in being more than a friend with Laterras. I also liked that she stayed true to her feelings and didn't try to convince herself that maybe she could grow to have those same feelings for him. If she wasn't secure in who she was, and wasn't desperate for a relationship, she probably would have gone along with him. That decision could have possibly hurt their friendship especially if it didn't escalate into anything. Laterras, rejection is a hard pill to swallow but you swallowed it gracefully. Getting mad, or refusing to continue a friendship with her would only reveal your immaturity. I believe in shooting your shot as long as you're ready to accept that your shot may not hit the target! There's a lot to learn from rejection. I've learned to not let rejection define who I am. I know the qualities I have so someone not seeing that is not a reflection of me. Another great season opener, Laterras! (I know I'm a year late, but it was still good..LOL) God bless your Kingdom Royale project. I pray it is a blessing to all the young men that are a part of it. I resonate with your letter because I too get excited when I think about my future husband. I can't wait to meet the one He kept for me until it was time. ❤

[@kimberlyturner4065]

I just love Essence’s heart! I pray that the Lord blesses her with the one He has for her

[@davedia100]

It was jaw dropping to hear the recording and even though you were rejected you took it well. That's big because some people really act ugly during these type of encounters so you are showing men how a mature response should look like.

[@DearFutureWifey]

Exactly

[@BrandyNicoleChristian]

Essence you are in good company. I've learned from being that type of woman that it's ok that the pursuit isn't by just anyone. Know that you are for a specific type of someone. Your poetic personality is supposed to be a repellent for those that it isn't for. Accept it and love it. That's what I've done. I've found a level of freedom in the assurance that if I am who I am what's for me will be. Laterras I absolutely love the vulnerability you displayed. It's speaks volumes and I can't wait for you to get that which you seek. Jay I felt you so much when you spoke about the human part of you being accepted and not just being viewed from what you do. It was a great conversation as usual. Loved it all!

[@karene3493]

I almost fell out when Mr Jay Barnett mentioned Pastor Toure Roberts' teaching on "Identifying your soulmate", the 5 keys in that teaching are guaranteed to have you succeed! Best teaching I've ever heard on Identifying "the one"! Awesome podcast!! Mr Laterras, while the amazing Essence may not be the one for you, I'm pretty sure your wifey will have characteristics of her, which is why you are(were) attracted to her! :-) Godspeed on your quest and thank you for this great content!

[@Christimony222]

Same!!!

[@supermodeljaz6829]

“What I want is someone to see my soul and be like ‘And damn she straight!” 🌹🥰 I adore Essence,I know that’s right! I second that emotion.

[@alicetheegreet]

This was just the most amazing interview ever! I loved what you said about learning or learning how to process and perceive rejection. I really loved the part about your boys' home. The clip from this video and the one you've been using recently are my favorite. This clip I love best.

[@alicetheegreet]

I also love the part where she talks about down playing her looks in order to not attract men who are only after her for her looks. That's what really resonates with me the most about this episode. 🫶🏾🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎

[@elizabethc9843]

Hey hey you all were so vulnerable to the core 🙈🙈 I was almost in tears watching you Laterras pick yourself up and must say only a person used by God will do this being so vulnerable. May God bring you the right one. God is truly with you 🙌🏾

[@therelationshipzonet.r.z.2258]

Just an FYI... many of US(WOMEN) have always wanted MEN to HEAL. Oftentimes we've carried the BRUNT of the Healing process while men have been moving forward wrecking lives without real spoken(outward) accountability. So yes, J and L... healing is attractive because it allows a woman like myself to feel more comfortable in connecting.

[@chrisparker6249]

Regardless of the platform we own or the representative that we may present to the public, we are human first. And that human side will show its face unexpectedly. I really dig the rawness of this podcast. And to Essence, you're beautiful sister, you embody the spirit of Proverbs 31: A Wife of Noble Character. Thank you brothers for imparting good knowledge.

[@karenmcgee1869]

Amen!

[@beingmichellem3072]

I've always been the silent follower. I really enjoy your content. It is refreshing to see a man like you Laterras, taking the bullet and being the door for other man to be able to see how beautiful vulnerability an transparency can be. I want to applaud you for taking this journey as a Christian man and not hide behind religion but be bold enough to live out the scripture more than quoting it. God will not only bless the work of your hands, but your intimacy with God will definitely bring you to a relationship that will be a reflection of who HE is in you. You are definitely worth the wait brother, don't lower your standard and wait for the click! PS. Thank you for showing up and shooting your shot, through that Essence taught me how to be graceful without losing the friendships. Bless you all🙏🏼

[@DearFutureWifey]

@gracefullybroken Beautiful comment. Thank you so much. "But your intimacy with God will definitely bring you a relationship that will be a reflection of who HE is in you." THAT PART! Touched me deeply.

[@emmanuelbuckland7258]

Jay Barnett a real dude... He sees through the smoke and mirrors and removes himself from the romanticism of vulnerability.... Vulnerability is not always this beautiful

[@ba091579]

I’m so ready for Season 4 We singles are ready and taking notes. This was a great way to begin the season with Kingdom fellowship . 👑👑👑❤️❤️❤️👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@stephaniecollins9202]

Tactician - a person who uses a carefully planned strategy to achieve a specific end.

[@kantricedorsey2873]

That was a perfect word she used!

[@Womenswell022]

Strong words from sis Essence, "I am use to operating without a covering" that says a lot...

[@Michellehardyorg]

I love that Essence was so brave & understood being recorded. She could have been told ahead of time to get her permission, but she handled it so well. I love these shows & the honesty & vulnerability is fire.

[@tiffanytip23]

I think this caught everyone by surprise. This showed a level of engagement, transparency and commitment to your audience. We felt your vulnerability by putting yourself out there. Well done, I'm sure you touched many lives by doing that.

[@ClosertoGod612]

I haven't even watched anything. I just saw the faces and my heart was jumping for joy. 🤣🤣🌹🌹❤

[@deenpElias]

😂 same!

[@thegirlsclub24]

The balance of perspective in this episode is refreshing to hear. When Essence said she's used to be being uncovered I felt that in my soul.

[@tynesha3710]

Amazing episode. THANK YOU all for your vulnerability. There's a Luther Vandross song that says "you don't have to guess what's going on inside my head." How awesome to actually have an example of articulation, vulnerability, honesty, and mature communication in dating and singleness. At the end of the day, we're all just human beings. It's time to stop putting people - including pastors, clergy, and celebrities - on a pedestal (idolatry). So much I could say, but mainly... I pray this episode draws others to Christ. I believe people will see this and seek this level of healing, maturity, and faith that only comes when you're submitted to Christ. One of the few platforms to which I subscribe... so glad I do. Thanks, Laterras.

[@LaRennEstherTV1985]

This was beautiful!! She is protecting him and herself!!! Like she said, “ Never said never “! God can do all things!! This is beautiful!

[@shauneharrison1313]

Laterras you are brave! This episode increased my admiration for your process and your mantra of being LIT. Praying for you my brother!

[@DearFutureWifey]

Facts!

[@karenjackson5685]

I love how you explained how you felt and your delivery. Such a gentleman. I also love Essence's response as she respectively declined but was honest about how she feels about you and loves you as her friend. This was was an awesome episode and I pray you 2 remain good friends❤️

[@zimkitastuurman6720]

So excited!!! And it's like 23:00 am in SA and I am going to work tomorrow. But, this is the hill I'm willing to die on! Thank you Laterras, Jay and Essence ❤

[@ClosertoGod612]

Sisi me and you. Kuphele nobuthongo as soon as I saw the notification 🤣🤣🤣🙈

[@zimkitastuurman6720]

🤣🤣

[@DearFutureWifey]

I love it! Thanks.

[@ajordan1847]

Lol!!!🙏❤

[@TheBusinessCentral]

Hey nina, hambani niyobuka Uyajola 9/9, niyeke izinto zabadala. Lol.

[@susan8576]

I just learnt how to speak to a man who is interested in me. Kindness, respect and praises. Love love love this episode.

[@MsDee-xc8uc]

I really love this channel! My perspective on dating and marriage has been enlightened. I can't wait for my Kingdom husband!! 🙌🏿

[@cherwallace6026]

Oh my God! That was such a vulnerable and courageous thing to do. I’m kind of floored. The hosts’s approach was so genuine, and Essence handled the situation with so much care and loving. Men should pursue and not persuade. Women should present and not pursue. These are gold nuggets of advice. I love it!

[@SachesKorner]

I agree!

[@MachelleNowlin]

My heart fluttered when I imagined being in Essence shoes, receiving that phone call from you!! I was giddy and excited 😆!!! I love Essence and feel the same way when when she said, that she wants a man who sees her. In that phone call you saw her, acknowledged her, and with full strength in love and vulnerability you allowed her an opportunity to go into a deeper more intimate place with you. I can't speak for every woman, but that is something that I pray for, long for, desire, and require from my future husband... Covering!Thank you, Latteras for showing me every time I listen or watch your podcast, that what I 🙏🏽 for in a black man is very real and he's not a unicorn or scarce! There are REAL GENUINE AND TRANSPARENT BLACK MEN DOING THE WORK, WALKING IT OUT, WHILE LIVING FOR CHRIST AND WITH CHRIST!! Thank you 💖💖💖 #KeepingItLIT

[@dineoportiamagoro3212]

Laterras, thank you so much for your showing us that it is OK to step out of your comfort zone and be vulnerable and shoot your shot Great conversation as always - I've learnt so much from each one of you; and in the process I'm learning and discovering so much about myself. May God bless you for being a blessing to us

[@Mzzg]

It's refreshing to see and hear men show and talk about their feeling! You and Jay are helping so many men and I appreciate that. It's okay not to be okay❤

[@leleflower2366]

What Gives Me Joy is seeing 2 Powerful People being honest in their Feelings. He saw an open opportunity and She graciously responded. This is a moment that shows Us You don't have to Say Yes even when it would look Good. If it's not right for now that is fine. And there's no Love lost

[@Btj87]

I’m with Jay. I’m not shooting my shot. I have to follow the inner voice. Get from behind the screen Laterras. This is gooooood!

[@jarhonda2702]

I feel Jay's perspective on meeting ppl thru social media platform..so many ppl aren't who they portray to be on social media. So it's about meeting the person in real time..making real connections with the person personally.

[@sultrysonay5492]

The humanity of this dialogue, thank you. ❤️❤️❤️🥰I love you guys. I love this work.

[@caterpillar_properties]

I'm so excited that I found this platform. Thank you for resurrecting hope for love! 🙏 And I know that had to be difficult for Essance, but I admire her honestly and how delicately she delivered that message. She's amazing!!!!

[@designzbyjulez9838]

I love how he is being honest about his singleness. Woman do need a man who are emotionally and physically available!!!

[@msshawbear]

I can identify with Essence. I know who I am and I refuse to compromise. Thank you for sharing this. It is helping me even the more.

[@TheOmegaGamer339]

What??!! This is a treat!!! We can do all the work but certain things are not truly healed until you experience in a relationship..all those things are wonderful in theory but practical is the true test. Commitment is key.

[@banita1134]

Yes, so true! It's one thing to talk the talk, but you gotta walk the walk.

[@Narjahm]

The conversation between the both of them was so beautifully mature, bold, and transparent. So glad you shared this with everyone and thanks for this episode.

[@kamogelomokomane4462]

LISTEN!!! That Phone call... I SCREAMED AT MY SCREEN!!! Thank you both for being so honest and vulnerable, that was not easy. I felt the care from Essence and the nervous energy at the same time. Man I wanted it to end with them dating, but the lesson is honestly a better outcome for men and women. THANK YOU. Jay is hilarious. I really appreciate how open you all are about how "no" affects men and women and the right way to say "no" to someone without making them feel devalued.

[@raunaawene6314]

Yes i screamed aloud too

[@Freedom-kf1pw]

This was so helpful in so many ways! And the sharing of that recording was such a blessing! Thank y'all for this and for just being yourselves!💯🥰♥️

[@jayking2762]

Thank you Laterrius for your sheer transparency. I felt your energy with Essence from her initial podcast. I love that you were honest to share it with your audience. Your friendship with Essence has a purpose, and God will work it out. He always does. I love your podcast, and how you're representing the Kingdom of Christ. Keep on Kneeling. God's got you, and your future wifey. Amen.

[@stephaniecollins9202]

Amen.

[@mabhayiintokazy5490]

It's 12am in South Africa and I've been watching your videos since 7pm. I loved truly enjoyed watching this video. The wisdom here is 🤯🤯🤯🤯 thank you for allowing God to use you. I'm so glad I was led to your channel.

[@melissas_heart]

I am so thankful for this episode. It was moving, thought provoking, challenging, inspiring, and very relevant to the times we live in. There is so much to glean from it if you truly sit and absorb the conversation. A true conversation between friends that is authentically impacting my life as a Christian single. I don’t agree with the idea of shooting your shot, because it contradicts my belief that God is intentional about every detail of my life including the one He is preparing me to walk out His purpose and plan on the earth. However, I truly appreciated the care Laterras took with his words to express the intentions of his heart toward’s Essence. I equally appreciate the care that Essence took with her words to communicate her truth concerning how she felt about him as a man and brother in Christ. I can see how the Holy Spirit was guiding her to be careful in her approach to not sting him with her words but to encourage him to continue to step out regardless of the fear of rejection. 🗣🗣🗣 After watching this episode twice, I appreciated Jay as a friend and mediator offering words of wisdom, knowledge, and understanding concerning what was said and done in the entire situation. I can see how and why God allowed this to unfold just the way that it did for His good purpose. As Christians, we don’t talk about these things within our circles due to religiosity even though God has given us instructions about being intentional in relationships to one another. We would not know that if we don’t first start our day caught up in His presence and devouring His Word for ourselves. Laterras, overall this was a great conversation followed by one of the most beautiful letters you have written to date. Just as God is intentional about His daughters and choosing a spouse for them, He is equally intentional about His sons. Your examples are Issac, Jacob, and Boaz. If you want to take it even further, look at King Xerxes and Queen Esther. Now that was an intentional move of God to intercede on behalf of a whole nation. A message for all to see beyond what we see so it does not limit what God desires to do through us for the Kingdom and glory of God. Thank you for your obedience. God will get the glory out of this. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

[@wandaalbritton3632]

I'm watching this on 07/28/2023 and this conversation is helping me; even a year later. Thank you all!