Decluttering Advice I Wish Someone Gave Me Sooner

When you start decluttering, do you fear losing a piece of who you are? If you answer yes, then bingo, this video is for you. Here is some decluttering advice I wish someone had given me sooner.
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Timestamps:
0:00 Intro
1:58 The Problem
3:20 Causing Disruption
3:40 Download Core Values Worksheet
4:20 Disrupting Comfort
8:30 Disrupting Familiarity
13:02 Disrupting Routine
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#ronaldlbanks #minimalism #decluttering

[@jerseygurlinmaryland]

There’s something so soothing about your delivery. 😊

[@RonaldLBanks]

Thank you! I appreciate that!

[@k.6160]

Agreed 💯!!! Yes!

[@arlenefranco9663]

Yes, I agree too.

[@edwardtaylor502]

Oh, yes! I love it! 🧘🎉

[@aliciagc2539]

Listening to Ronald I feel like I’m visiting with a wise and trusted friend. You have wisdom in your youth that many people only acquire in their later years, if at all. I’m dedicating a big part of today to decluttering, and the ideas you present here will help and guide me. I feel inspired and capable of making some significant changes. Thank you for sharing. You have some of the very best content in the decluttering and minimalism space on KZbin.

[@KG-bv6eg]

My fear is not losing me, but losing (again) other people I’ve loved and lost. I look at their things and think “they held this thing, they sat in this chair, they made this thing, they touched this thing” - I’ve tried taking photos, journaling about memories, etc., but I can’t get over feeling like if I get rid of this thing that is linked to them, I’m throwing “them” away…or, more so, throwing away something that links me to them. I know I have memories, but they are just in my head….they aren’t tangible things to touch and hold. I think when you lose someone and don’t have their physical presence, it’s hard to get rid of physical things that emote their presence. 😢

[@k.6160]

Me too. All my family has passed away. 😢

[@k.6160]

Same here. All my family is gone. It's sad and hard. I'm also drowning in photos, that's the hardest part.

[@Whatworksthisworks]

There is a way of feeling better…listen to this advice he is giving. Take pictures of the items you want and then let other people enjoy them ❤ I’m praying for you!

[@jaelithecrislip9151]

I've found it helpful to choose one keepsake for each person and discard the rest. It makes it so I can put in the emotional labor to choose a single item that best represents that person, that I can then hold to honor them. But I don't need multiple items for each person. I'm not saying this is the only way, just that it has worked for me. Best of luck.

[@sheilak4493]

Me too

[@polgara28]

Decluttering my "Fantasy Self" was the most difficult for me. I wanted to be Martha Stewart, but upon reflection, I hate cooking. My kitchen is far simpler now. I do cook daily, but I don't need ALL the things. 🙂

[@RonaldLBanks]

Love this. I’m happy you found that clarity and now have a kitchen that fits what you need and do (in terms of cooking). I agree, decluttering your “Fantasy Self” is very challenging but you did it and that’s awesome. Keep growing on your journey my friend.

[@polgara28]

@@RonaldLBanks ♥

[@sct4040]

I have a problem loving kitchen pots and pans, gadgets, and appliances too much.

[@M.Campbell]

My problem is that, as a creative person, I can figure out a use for darn near anything. I've had to learn how to look at something, let my creativity run and figure out uses for it. Then i have to ask myself "Yes, you could do that with it, but WILL you?" It has helped a great deal but I still struggle. I'm going through an extreme purge because I'm moving into a travel trailer. It's brutal.

[@OmegaRejectz]

That’s definitely important. I know a few people who will keep around anything that could serve a purpose, but unfortunately they never actually use the item for a purpose and instead it just collects dust.

[@ros8986]

Sending thoughts of support for your process.

[@Blackroseofplue]

Thank you

[@sabinadrotar1889]

🪴🌿 If you feel that your space is empty after decluttering - add a plant. It will add a sense of aliveness and good energy. 🌱 Even a white room with a green plant looks great.

[@KathleenGreer-hk6yl]

Kudos on a truly helpful video. There are so many videos showing how to declutter but most don't deal with the psychological and emotional factors that make us hold onto their stuff. Until we resolve these identity issues, many of us will never declutter successfully. I felt sentimental about everything so it was a battle for me. Thanks for the encouragement.

[@RonaldLBanks]

I’m very happy that you found this helpful. I’m glad that I can present more than just the “how to” and have it be received in such a positive way. Thank you for the opportunity and for listening!

[@Backroadsvagabond]

From watching you and Joshua Becker over and over, for months, I finally got rid of moms stuff that was useless to me. Moms in my heart, not in her stuff. Feel so much lighter. I live in a van, so i dont need excess stuff! Thank you for the excellent videos.

[@ros8986]

Andrew Mellen says "your grandmother's tea cup is not your grandmother."

[@Patchouliprince]

My biggest issue with letting go is that I fear I’ll regret giving up the item because I have such a bad memory I feel like if I loose the item I’ll loose the memories attached. I have been working hard to address that though, my approach is mostly to be okay with forgetting parts of my life because it is what it is. And perhaps remembering those things out of the blue some day will be a pleasant treat

[@susan3037]

It has taken me a long time, but now I feel that with every extraneous item I give away, recycle, or discard, I am getting closer to the person I really am. I am a senior citizen, so when I say it has taken me a while, I truly mean that. Thank you for this video.

[@k.6160]

Clutter is causing me so much stress, it's overwhelming. I was already cluttered and then inherited a whole House of belongings from my parent's house. My relatives are all gone... parents', siblings, grandparents, aunts... That's a hell of a lot of stuff! Ugh. The photos are the toughest. I have boxes upon boxes and albums of photos. ❤❤

[@polgara28]

The best advice I can give you, is leave the sentimental items for last. Make the easy decisions first. Seriously ugly lamp? Bye! Black velvet painting of dogs playing poker? See ya! (Unless you really love it!) It helps you to gain confidence. You've already decluttered your things, and sometimes getting rid of other's things can be more difficult because of the emotions involved. Set aside one or two really sentimental items from them, (not counting the photos) and tell yourself that this is what you will keep. Or keep a bin or box full. The rest of the decisions are easy. Good luck and I'm sorry for your loss!

[@smontone]

I take family photos and upload them to family search. I write about what I know about the photo, who they were, when it was, what they were doing. It makes a more permanent record of these things that will live forever.

[@chelseajones5977]

The freedom on the other side is often so hard to see until you’ve experienced it. I always held so closely to everything and was so protective of my belongings ever since I was a child. Once I really started letting go, I discovered it all mattered so much less to me than I realized. It all seemed so replaceable and the less I own, the less it’s gravitational pull on me. I’m forever thankful for not being controlled by my possessions and being present here and now. ❤

[@RonaldLBanks]

Love this. Keep going on your journey Chelsea!

[@metasymphony]

I don’t feel that my items are part of my identity, not the stuff I want to declutter anyway. The thing mostly stopping me is “it’s still useful, I don’t think I can find someone who wants it, and it might end up in landfill if I donate it”. The stuff I can reasonably donate or give away, I am pretty good with. But I don’t want to be part of the overconsumption cycle - which is part of my core values.

[@veganfreedom]

Yeah, that's me! I can totally relate to this. ❤ Does anybody have an advice in that?

[@GiselleBel]

I feel the best thing you can do with unwanted items is not to buy another one like it. The object that sits around in your house was already purchased or acquired, it exists. To have it around cluttering up your place doesn't change that fact. I wouldn't assume that donating things means that you're being irresponsible. Also, recycling methods may improve in future so that even landfill might get mined as source material. Your place is not a dump site, you are allowed to get rid of things that are no longer right for you. You don't need to feel guilty as penance for having an object around that you don't want. Allow yourself to let go, start small and see how it goes.

[@CatherineSaimon-uv7nf]

I burn my clutter 😂😅

[@zennoodle]

The video speaks to the 2023 version of me. I was worried about identity. I was scared to lose that identity. Then I sold a ton of nostalgia (re: GI Joes, Transformers, misc Japanese robots) over the weekend. I haven't looked at any of them in well over 35+ years. $140 later I had a nice sushi dinner Saturday but the point is disconnecting from the yesteryears does not identify of the life I am creating. This video is both talking to me from the years past but also who I am and who I will be. Life is good. Love these videos Ron! Keep going, keep climbing and keep lifting us with your message.

[@leebradford6283]

I felt the same way. Then as I got rid of more and more…it actually changed how I do everything including what I look like and what I wear it’s weird!! I also learnt to put things away as opposed to using surface as storage. But I definitely feel like I am lost quite a bit whilst I am down to the final touches of decluttering.

[@Meemee-mo5it]

I'm grateful for the quality of work that you share.

[@newdiffrentbetter]

I just moved and I could see how decluttering and adopting minimalist principles made the packing and unpacking extremely easy.

[@stefanforester6737]

My possessions are owning me, I feel like I’m swimming in treacle. I have so many hobbies/interests that I have so little time available to actually indulge in these pastimes. The amount of stuff associated with them really clutters my mind.

[@smontone]

Your voice is so gentle and I feel your kindness coming through. It’s really relaxing. You mentioned a toddler, do you find minimalism more difficult with a kid? I sure do. My decluttering journey took a side quest when my son was born. Managing his processions can be a lot.

[@ros8986]

For me, decluttering is excavation to find my life.

[@purplewitch8525]

Thank you for this video it has immediately become one of my favorites of all times, and I know I will keep coming back to it when I need a break from my own thoughts when decluttering my home.

[@laurapearson3258]

I have been working on decluttering for three years. It ebbs and flows as the seasons of my life change. People who visit already call our house empty. I like to call it calming. Still slowly purging after three years. It's a slow methodical process. Especially with kiddos in the mix.

[@advitasastry2634]

Appreciate your efforts ! I guess our house or possessions should be meaningful then they would automatically reflect who we are …having junk and keeping things that don’t matter can also reflect what we are but in a negative way.

[@kasiapetruk6730]

Sometimes I think of those scenarios when there is a fire and any risk to the building and you are expected to leave without taking anything with you. Just the thought makes me anxious. What about my passport, my phone, wallet and few other bits like a jacket? Not sure how you are expected to continue living and getting stuff done without your documents.

[@juliemcdaniel499]

Go to ur local Dept of vital records, request a dupe and start living again. Jacket/clothes, etc go to Wal-Mart. Worry if only needed.

[@GiselleBel]

It can be useful to keep your driving licence and/or your passport where you can easily pick it up from as you rush out of your house. Getting other documents replaced is possible, it works better and quicker if you can prove your identity.

[@sheilak4493]

Absolutely… fear of losing myself! It just paralyzes me at time and I clutter shift all the time!

[@rebeccabaron1348]

Love your content. I can’t express enough how motivation it is. I’m 60 and still on my decluttering journey. It brings me much more peace. Question… do you have a video of a home tour? It’s a personal space and I respect that if you don’t. I do love seeing those though. I get a lot of inspiration from them.

[@itsdaksha]

I would love an in depth video on properly decluttering the mind. Decluttering our homes is so physically visible, but mind isn’t! Would love your teachings on it ❤

[@s__erv]

Having a hard time letting go of my military uniforms and leftover gear. I lost a bunch of photos from that time and only have a couple in uniform.

[@Meemee-mo5it]

It took many years, but I was able to release mine. It was freeing for me.

[@OmegaRejectz]

Would a photo or a framed photo of the uniforms/ you in the uniforms make it easier to get rid of them?

[@mrsparker195]

Save them. You will regret letting them go.

[@Meemee-mo5it]

@@mrsparker195 Not everyone feels regret, but minimizing down to one set of every day and one set of formals to start might be helpful.

[@mrsparker195]

@@Meemee-mo5it you are absolutely right, not everyone will feel regret. Just sharing my own personal experience and knowing he will never get them back once they are gone. Besides the fact, they are his personal items, that he wore and served in, not like holding on to your mothers wedding dress. It’s up to him, either way. And besides he only has a couple left anyway.

[@louisemaris]

This is the BEST video I have ever seen on decluttering. I LOVE your channel! This clarifies so many aspects of cluttering and your website an resources are second to none! Thank you so much!

[@KeishelleNichole]

Good point on moving room to room

[@RonaldLBanks]

Thank you! I’m glad that resonated with you.

[@natashyas4149]

Good stuff, Ron. Hard to break scarcity mindset. Grateful for your example and value based approach

[@patriciainportland5567]

I'm realizing my things indicate I lived/am living a full life, that I matter, and I'm not poor. Only the homeless, the go-nowheres have "nothing." I think others have this in mind because I have seen their minimal items are often *very* high end. Quiet luxury, for sure. I lived out of my car/a tent by choice for almost a year, traveling across the US, so I know minimal for the basics.

[@minimalistsmanaged]

Excellent advice I wish I'd also received earlier haha :) Great video, as always Ronald :)

[@faeriemagic3546]

After winter i look through what i didnt wear and donate them.. brought out summer clothes and will do the same thing.. i also only have one small shelf of books .. i always donate books ive already read.. i will know that i will not read again.. room for a new book!

[@ABrigitteM]

Thank you🙏

[@annetteaughney9182]

This is so fantastic!! So much that hasn't been said before. Just loved this, and love your channel.❤

[@SkyePrescott]

Spot on! Another amazing one by the Decluttering God:) thanks for sharing your advice Ron👏🏻

[@MFG1212]

Hola, siento no poder escribirte en inglés. Te acabo de descubrir , estoy viendo tus videos y me gusta mucho tu estilo. Eres claro, práctico . Enhorabuena y gracias ! Un saludo.

[@gabanciano]

Needed to hear this. Thank you

[@RonaldLBanks]

I’m happy this video reached you my friend!

[@GiselleBel]

I get really annoyed at myself for how long my decluttering is taking. I'm lucky that I don't have my identy too wrapped up in stuff. My problem is that I already chucked lots of extraneous stuff that I'm left with things that are so very useful (I cycle through my hobbies. I eventually get back to something I did years ago). I paid good money for those and I'd like to get use out of it. My solution has been to look through things with hopefully an increasing emotional distance. I can still find things that aren't important to me, or that aren't as useful as I expected. I occasionally decide that I no longer want to do a specific hobby, like weaving. Haven't touched it in decades, won't touch it again, don't like the results I was getting: it can go. What a relief!

[@Tuntee]

inspiring!

[@ros8986]

Such a great video, as always

[@RonaldLBanks]

Thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed it.

[@kikitaube-hansen]

Great video about performing a new Life Style. Did that over 20 years ago and its an ongoing process. Thank you.

[@lookingtowardsthesun]

Wow. This was very helpful, especially dissociating myself from the items that I have accumulated, but have yet to do anything with them yet & fantasizing about what I could be. It's time to let go ao that I'll be free to move forward. Thank you

[@dominiquepayne1341]

Thanks for your video. I'm downsizing and must do a big declutter. It helps, listening to you.

[@dypick]

I enjoy your channel. You seem very calm and happy. I’d love it know you.

[@patriciajones1567]

I feel overwhelmed with clutter in my home. I can’t sit down a craft with stuff everywhere.

[@ros8986]

"the things you own end up owning you" - Fight Club as quoted in Fumio Sasaki's book Goodbye Things

[@makichannels1073]

For me, decluttering is not the answer to everything. Things are things that are meant to be used until the end of their life. I am an environmentally friendly person so I just don't declutter mindlessly, it doesn't mean that I am attached to things, no. I just don't want to create more waste. I don't buy things mindlessly either. For example, jeans. I don't wear jeans as much anymore, so if I don't like a pair of jeans, and this pair is in pristine condition, I'd give it to someone, a friend or a family that wants it, if they don't want it, I won't let it go (sometimes it could be a pair that someone is looking for 😂). If, the pair that I have is not usable, I use it as rags (I don't buy rags anymore since textile is a very versatile piece that can be used in more ways than one). Just like I don't buy trash bags, I just use grocery bags (unless it is a law to use trash bags in your area 😂). My point is, don't just declutter things just because they don't fit your aesthetics. A lot of people declutter but then they just buy other things and then they get bored. That is just wasteful. Simplify. Stop accumulating and use what you already have.

[@leisure057blank3]

If the stuff I grew up with, that I have the most problems getting rid of. My mothers books, her collection, her everyday things. I got rid of her clothing, but the rest is more difficult.

[@pamelascott3184]

😂😂😂 I'm so guilty of this.

[@RTSJamal]

Brother you are silky smooth, better every video!

[@suzannefortner6065]

I’m unable to download the core values sheet. There is a problem. Love your information and the way you deliver it. Thank you for what you do. 😊

[@RebeccaRuano]

Since the 90s I’ve had a suspicion that minimalism is the commercial economy’s new angle to get us to need to buy more things…. Also, I have the hoarder gene running in my families, but as a natural born Capricorn I can keep the chaos organized… not really a superpower, but kind of 😅Clutter shifting has been my whole game and I didn’t know the name 😂

[@catcrayon5173]

I don't know if you would read that, but I neeeed your help hahaha I downloaded the core values sheet and it was fun, creativity, adventure and inner peace. I have loads of fabrics, crafting materials and stuff in my room and sometimes the versatillity is awesome because I can fullfill my talent and sometimes it drives me nuts. I significantly decluttered in the past month, thanks to you!!! But still feeling like decluttering is stopping me from my talent (draw/paint/sew/etc.) What would you recommend?

[@d3d3m96]

As a Mom of 3 boys plus 1 Man, do you have any tips decluttering/ keeping things minimal! I'm trying but........🤷🏾‍♀️💥

[@CatherineSaimon-uv7nf]

I look younger after a masive decluttering..im 42

[@autobotdiva9268]

i decluttered recently....i still had curling irons!! lmaooooo

[@KristiBranstetter]

I always felt my stuff gave me an identity.... I had too much. I am happy with less. My goal was not minimalism. My goal was always about managing what I have. I am happy with where I am at.... Maintenance.

[@RiteOn]

I'm having to face the fact that I feel discomfort because of the clutter. I'm currently in the midst of a spending spree and I really don't need much of the stuff I'm accumulating. I think I spend as an "action" rather than "doing something useful". When I need to be doing something, I go shopping rather than attempt to organize all this clutter. Yup, I'm in trouble. 🙃

[@6pixiestix]

💯❤🏡

[@agak61]

I actually hate things 😅 throwing everything thing away

[@deaderanunn1502]

🤚🏾

[@loveydeveney]

👋

[@sydneykasmar]

✋

[@stara9254]

🙋‍♀️

[@TheT74]

Nope. I’ll have a bonfire’ 😅! 😅

[@janieespinosa]

🙋🏼‍♀️

[@user-mo6ck2rj7j]

Hi sir, are you looking for professional KZbin thumbnail designer?

[@jkamanalong]

Bro sounds like Drake

[@juliemcdaniel499]

Really, I don't pay D's voice no attn, but I'ma listen out now lol.

[@suzeepants]

I appreciate your channel so much. Your videos are so calming, and therapeutic. Thank you! Have a wonderful weekend.

[@RonaldLBanks]

Thank you so much my friend. I appreciate you and I’m glad you’re getting what you need from my content. You have a great weekend as well!

[@STAC1218]

✋️