DEF CON 22 - Gene Bransfield - Weaponizing Your Pets: The War Kitteh and the Denial of Service Dog

[@carrotman]

"If the compiler screams at you and you scream back you only really succeed at is scaring your wife" - Gene Bransfield 2014 I need that on a motivational poster sometimes.

[@binaryspace6444]

+Carrotman yes please.

[@COAx4nge1killa]

I literally scrolled down and saw the comment right as he said this lmao

[@estherstepansky5256]

Double ditto that if you are the wife screaming at a compiler - it REALLY scares your hubby!

[@aaa-vu5iw]

Holy shit, this guy is smooth. He's like the perfect speaker everyone wishes they could be.

[@TerjeNesthus]

Yeah, one of the best defcon talks :)

[@Burn3r10]

I love this talk. Makes me wanna goto DEFCON even more.

[@ulissemini5492]

@@Burn3r10 goto considered harmful

[@gorkyd7912]

He uses PEDs though. Bourbon.

[@0rez]

Exactly what i was thinking.

[@surlyogre1476]

"Dogs have owners, cats have staff."

[@Reman1975]

It's the old one about a dog looking at it's owner and thinking "This guy gives me a nice place to live, Food, and all the affection I want........ HE MUST BE A GOD!", But when a cat looks up at it's owner it thinks "This guy gives me a nice place to live, Food, and all the affection I want........ I MUST BE A GOD!".

[@michaelw9852]

i like cat girls better than furry doggos.

[@Pwnstared]

@@michaelw9852 Don't we all?

[@thegardenofeatin5965]

How to weaponize a cat: 1. Pick up cat. 2. Identify target. 3. Throw cat. 4. Detonation on impact.

[@spinellyg4803]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@questwalkerko]

*boom*

[@darkkaioken]

"There is still no patch for human stupidity." I need that on a shirt!!!

[@lisdmon6538]

34:21 wow he's so quick witted, he noticed nobody was clapping/cheering so he said something more to avoid an awkward silence. this guys got crazy good charisma

[@simonisenberg4516]

Fantastic talk. Funny but more importantly taking us through all the steps that were hard, annoying or just didn't work out. Many speakers go from idea to "hey it works" in a flash and you don't really feel like you learned anything or if it's something you might want to try too.

[@hyrdocomputing]

by far and away one of the funniest talks at defcon ever!

[@shpluk]

The interruption was way out of place

[@indecentseas-]

its funny watching this in 2018, literally a raspberry pi zero w + small gps module, would not only allow for war driving, but also supports packet injection, so you could perform deauth and get WPA information for later cracking.

[@RuckusRugs]

The overuse of the cat memes really dates it as well lol

[@tommihommi1]

I would go with an esp32 instead, much smaller form factor

[@corriblehunt4554]

I'd just go with the neverkissedbyagirl2000

[@EchoXIIIGO]

@@corriblehunt4554 You sure you didn't opt for the neverbeentocollege9000?

[@windwalker5765]

A step farther, an LTE-capable Apple or Samsung watch would do this nicely, I think. Might have to mess around a little, but all the hardware is right there...

[@OwlexMyth]

Thanks for bringing to light the TV B Gone product. It would be a pleasure to turn off sports games at the most inopportune times, repeatedly and with utmost contempt.

[@wege8409]

I love that this tech talk reminds me of stand-up comedy a little bit, it's nice to see a tech speaker that tries to engage people on a more natural level.

[@TrulyOutragious]

War kitteh is amazing, but ii have to say my favorite part is messing with the soccer game XD

[@KommaAchtKommaEins]

Years later but this is the most entertaining and awesome talk in a years. Thank you so much.

[@icarusswitkes6833]

This is the most entertaining defcon talk I've seen

[@pex1111]

Jesus christ. This is the single LONGEST video I have ever watched on KZbin from start to finish. This guy is awesome! Thanks for the great information AND keeping me interested the ENTIRE TIME :D

[@ViezeVingertjes]

You need farm born cats for this, those are proven to wander much further. Fun project though. ^^

[@pullybungieharder]

Farm cats will sell the collar on Ebay.

[@anonony9081]

Junkyard cats are pretty good too

[@TheTruthAboutLemmings]

He should do stand up with that energy and sense of humour.

[@awake31337]

That's hilarious that this was the first talk from 22 uploaded. I had seen a talk from this dude from another con on youtube last week and was telling everyone about it.

[@GuerrillaSauce]

*DEF CON 22 - Weaponizing Your Pets - Gene Bransfield* Probably the best DEFCON presentation I've seen, and one of the most accessible. #WarKitteh #DOSDog

[@OmegaNinjaKiller]

Im enjoying defcon thanks you guys for hosting theses awesome people

[@999hmartin]

Very cool Gene; sorry I had to bugout too early to catch this... Nice to see you have that same vibrant, energetic, bright mind and sense of humor. Never stray from the Way ;-)

[@christopherneufelt8971]

This is the sort of content that I was looking back at start of 90's. Great job, that what the internet documentary is all about.

[@davep8221]

Worth it just for the pic of the grandma.

[@FoxDren]

googled kitty coat... is safe

[@RoamingAdhocrat]

Yeah, I'm just getting pics of coats with kittens on them.

[@ayrendraganas8686]

I thought it would be either furry weirdnes or a coat made of kitties

[@RoamingAdhocrat]

@@ayrendraganas8686 I'm a Dwarf Fortress veteran. Kitten leather clothing is nothing new to me.

[@Boost_Addict]

@@RoamingAdhocrat im getting a coats that look like a vagina....

[@yellowcrash10]

Nice Housepets avatar!

[@vikrantvijit1436]

Superb take on a very fascinating idea of putting ancient cats and dogs to play out future Sky God like CATS AND DOGS RAINING MAN.

[@johng7410]

Great talk, but that drinking interruption was super cringe.

[@stencil25]

So, so cringy. Trying to push this trope that, "Yeah, we drink anytime of the day, we're MEN and we're COOL", is so forced and cringe.

[@Garryck-1]

@@stencil25 - What's even cringier is you trying to paint this as some kind of "we're MEN" thing.. enough with the sexist bullshit already..

[@boycotgugle3040]

@@Garryck-1 Lol, sexist is the new racist or what? Just call everyone that, it makes no sense. It's not sexist. It's immature. End of story.

[@birchcakes]

lt didn’t seem as cringe to me because l’ve seen several videos where they interrupt to drink, but once you said that l realized that yeah, that was cringey as fuck. lt’s like they so desperately want to put out the vibe that they are cool party guys that drink. l will never understand some people’s drive to present themselves in that fashion.

[@burdenonsociety1968]

Was waiting for that part after reading this comment, thought it might of been a refreshing beer but them shots seems a super try hard flex at " look we're the coolest guys in the room" failure

[@NonciclopediaForEver]

Amazing presentation, fantastic speaker. I don't know a iota about tech but DEFCON talks are always good fun.

[@Reman1975]

I've watched a fare few of these DEF CON talks online. Most have been very informative, and interesting on a technical level. But I have to say this ones been the most entertaining so far. Interesting, Informative AND this Gene Bransfield is FUNNY AS F**K !!!! :)

[@Allegheny500]

A friend showed this to me, I think with a little tweaking Gene's denial of service dog pack would be the perfect augmentation to actual Bomb sniffing dogs as it would keep terrorists from triggering the bomb by cell phone, radio or other device.

[@windwalker5765]

Now that is a pretty decent idea.

[@JedF2010]

Absolutely excellent presentation! Very funny!

[@goyabee3200]

A "What is Arduino" slide? In 2014? Whuuut

[@jort93z]

i was suprised too.

[@THarshavardhanReddy]

@excited box I'm sure he was exaggerating for comical purposes. Or maybe not, I don't care, he gave laughs to people. Don't wanna ask more! :P

[@PyroDesu]

From my brief time in the service industry: Nobody really questioned the DoS Dog because they're not *allowed* to question. Not only does federal law prohibit all but two very vague questions, the stores themselves generally prohibit their employees from asking anything at all.

[@jwadaow]

which questions?

[@AureliusR]

Technical point: GPS satellites do NOT broadcast NMEA. That makes no sense at all. NMEA strings contain your lat/lon. How could a single satellite know that? No, GPS satellites just transmit timecodes. That's it. You listen to a bunch of them, look at the difference in time it takes to receive a particular timecode, use some geometry and bang. THEN the chip converts that into an NMEA string that is easily parsed by programming languages. Carry on.

[@AureliusR]

Also... "to spite that"? How does this guy have a job?

[@AureliusR]

And again... soldering is EXTREMELY easy... it really, truly is. I can't imagine why people have so much trouble with it. Put the hot side on one side of the thing to solder. Push in solder from the other side. Remove both pieces. Done. It's so therapeutic and relaxing to just solder a bunch of components into a working circuit... I started out liking this talk and laughing along, then got more and more annoyed.

[@billklatsch5058]

Annnd if u are a bit to long on the chip with the hot end on it... you have a grilled chip. Stuff is not for everyone - deal with it. He may also did a bit of exaggeration for the entertainment. The difficulty of soldering or the how GPS actually works was not the topic of the talk anyways. kisses

[@birchcakes]

Man, you sound like you’re real fun at parties. Just because something is easy for you doesn’t mean it’s easy for everyone. Like welding is a breeze for me, but l fully acknowledge that it is not easy for most people. But hey, what do l know? l’m subpar at soldering so maybe l’m just a mouth-breather.

[@pieter1212112]

wtf is wrong with you-_-

[@hyperhektor7733]

you can do even better stuff, add a speaker to the dog so you can command him remotely ofer CB or Babyphone + add a remote camera.

[@isaackarjala7916]

Or instead of a speaker train the dog to respond to electro massage

[@semibreve]

man its crazy watching this talk now and hearning them talk about Arduino like its a new thing

[@fineartonfire_5327]

@ 29:13....I have 2 Dobermans, now. 1 IS a trained service dog and I had another trained up as well. But bless her heart, she passed about 2 years ago. That’s 2 Dobie service animals. And I saw another one at VA recently. So they DO exist!! I absolutely LOVE dobies. As you’ve never truly loved u til you have been loved by a Doberman!!

[@mattstorm360]

3:30 High Rick.

[@sir_ellias7444]

😂😂 underrated comment

[@candykanefpv]

the acoustikitty part is incorrect. they found that the cat's prey drive was so overwhelming that it would prefer to hunt birds than do actual spying, so they did brain surgery on it to make it not get hungry and then it STILL didn't work and then they took all the equipment out of the cat and gave it to someone to take care of it.

[@ETXAlienRobot201]

wow... the getting run over story sounds way better...

[@burdenonsociety1968]

Yeah I think he's going for laughs not facts

[@amyshaw893]

see the citation needed video about this

[@frankm3214]

That toast should have been at the end and not interrupted the talk. Very poor social skills, but what else should we expect.

[@markfelix8868]

This is why I am constantly infuriated with how technology and people interface. These people that dwvwlop how my smart phone works are exceptional at technical skill, my phone functions amazingly, until I begin to use it. Nowall of the features are suddenly retarded. My phone is stopping me from doing what I'm doing, thinking it can read my mind and trying to give me what it thinks I really want meanwhile I have to fight through what the phone thinks I want to reiterate my initial attempts to make something happen. Then my phone has the audacity to stop me from functioning by pop up boxes that ask questions like, "did you know that listening to the phone at high volume can be harmful to your hearing?" And I'm like motherfucker! The slave is acting up! It is asking me questions when I did not ask it to ask me a question! This is why people break there phones. It's like they can figure out how to make a rock make a phone call and look up the internet but they can't figure out how I, the common person , wants to use it. Just let me design the part where humans interact with the damn thing and we have one super smart phone. But no, you tech people have to remain morons when it comes to human relationships. I'm dying to be able to program apps like Waze, and Amazon music or essentially any app on any phone. I could rework that so nobody else would use any other app but the ones that I worked on. I understand how humans want to use the machines. It is plain as day for me and self evident and no one else has my vision. No else can see it but me!

[@deskpro256]

@@markfelix8868 Put your money where your mouth is. About the volume thing, I feel the same way, but they have to have the popup for legal reasons, so the user is informed, so they can't be sued for hearing damage, because they clearly stated that.

[@pianochannel100]

Yes, that was quite irritating.

[@smugmode]

@@deskpro256 Do they really, though? For legal purposes? The flashlight/LED on my phone could damage someone's eyes with how bright it is, but they don't issue warnings when I turn that on.

[@up2gamer]

@@smugmode because no one casually looks into their LED/Flashlight of their phone, lmao. That's just searching for problems xd

[@Roxor128]

Makes me wish I still had a cat. I'd be seriously tempted to try this if I did. After all, I already use WiGLE on my phone when I go out, and I've personally contributed most of my town's WiGLE entries over the last three years.

[@hellshade2]

okay the first denial of service dog graphic made me laugh my ass off! whippet and whippet good. only people who were young in the 80's an were mtv fans caught this one! ;D

[@birchcakes]

hellshade2 l mean, l was born in 94 and caught it. Some of us know previous generations pop-culture haha

[@StarGazerTom1991]

3:35 dude fucking sounds like Rick there lmao.

[@osearthesp]

huge

[@DRSDavidSoft]

YES, he does!

[@AngusRedherd]

Everytime I am down, or the community is being shitty, I watch this talk and it inspires me, and puts a smile on my face.

[@digitalmagick]

Alcohol abuse: Finding the worst possible time in the middle of the speaker's demonstration to interrupt them with alcohol. That drink could have and should have been enjoyed. Not forced.

[@TheOneMiffy92]

What a perfect example of a DEFCON Hazing ritual. Quit your bullshit.

[@stevekelly5485]

Sounds like you were about to cough up a FUR BALL! Cats... Also remember soldering the B-side of Jocko Homo by Devo around 1980. Still have it. Great video. Thanks.

[@nothankyouplease8176]

Awesome! When are we gonna see more videos from DEFCON 22?

[@DEFCONConference]

We have a few more to post in the coming days - the bulk of them will be up this fall.

[@barryjreid]

DEFCONConference can we please get this talk www.itweb.co.za/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=137136:sensepost-demos-wifi-attacks-at-defcon

[@SomvangDisouryavong-p4s]

My aunt took my kitty to get her 'shots' . Came back w/a microchip , that u CANT track /GPS. U have to wait til some outstanding good sumaritan announces via in person , maybe the phone , 'THIS CAT HAS A CHIP CONTACT THE OWNER'. I haven't seen her after letting my aunt watch her the 2nd time. My question is ARE U SURE I CANT HACK , GOD WILLING SHES STILL ALIVE 😢

[@CatFish107]

Sewing can be a great skill for a creative type. My wife works with GIS, and sews her own clothing.

[@omralmdni2835]

Really good presentation 9.5/10

[@philipbyrnes7501]

Wasn’t it W. C. Fields who said “Never work with animals or children”? Lol, great talk, thanks 👍🏻

[@captobvious360]

Did they have to do the new speaker drink in the middle of you narrating a video? They couldn't wait 30 seconds? =/

[@ktxed]

it's tradition bro :)

[@slinkytreekreeper]

Tradition is the reason behind some terrible things from pedos to killing, some dumb fuck did it before them so it makes it ok. Of course this wasn't that extreme but it was still a douche disrespectful timing when congrats1 min later would have flowed. He was experienced enough of a speaker that it didn't put him off but may would have been.Here you go, don't worry though, it's a tradition.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Etoro_people

[@technosteed4644]

If I close my eyes it's Frank Caliendo talking tech

[@eideticex]

So not fair. When I try to do this kind of stuff I get police at my door asking me to shut down the equipment or they'll come back with a warrant and shut it down for me. This dude gets a cute assistant to wear his hack and walk around trolling in public.

[@glassed6852]

try? you been watching too many sucky hacker movies dude

[@eideticex]

Is there a sleezy hacker movie about war pets? That would be awesome and hilariously bad.

[@deus_ex_machina_]

@Smit Lord Oh! That's what I've been doing wrong...

[@burdenonsociety1968]

@Smit Lord pff! Amateur, plenty of rohypnol that's all you need

[@FlashxSwazy]

This guys really good at presentations

[@nicolek4076]

This guy is truly hilarious. I nearly peed myself!

[@Frosty-oj6hw]

Absolutely fucking brilliant talk, great subject and excellent speaker. Hope to see more of this guy.

[@NatalieSpa888]

Witches have been weaponizing their kittehs since the dawn of time;-) \o/

[@FFVison]

I love this video!

[@fox2fax565]

laughed my ass off, awesome presentation XD

[@enisten]

This is insanely good.

[@morgulbrut]

So much nostalgia here... Imagine he had a ESP8266 back then

[@Wrenchmonkey1]

Get that man a D1 Mini!

[@TanmayDharmaraj]

I don't even want to build one but this is so so so entertaining

[@bigun89]

24:02 - Ummm... it's 2018, and I have some bad news...

[@mysterymanforu]

To be fair, the open networks are run by isp's for their customers to use with their username and password, not for anybody to connect to.

[@Wrenchmonkey1]

I have an "Open" network as well... Sitting in front of a captive portal that uses 802.1x and Radius. Because, welcome to 2018; where shared keys are retarded, and have been since well before 2014. ;)

[@Wolfyjinny]

8:56 Bill is wrong unless he is an Abino that lives in Abuquerque or Aabama and drives a incoln to and from his job at owes. I bet he tells you his 'Heighth' is above 5 foot too

[@anonanon3066]

Great presentation! Awesome project!

[@burdenonsociety1968]

Sounds like they should put bill on the payroll instead

[@liquidbraino]

"Hair of the Denial of Service Dog"; without missing a beat.

[@TheCptCoy]

Acoustic cat being hit by a car is an urban legend. Supposedly one of the people working on the project adopted the cat, the project failed for other reasons

[@birdwing98]

23:50 A "tom" cat will wander much farther, especially at night. He "makes his rounds." Your next collar should have a microphone, and then you can post sounds of "heated cat love."

[@jackvernian7779]

heated cat love sounds like the most dire pits of hell.

[@tutekohe1361]

This guy is a born comedian! 👍

[@pukesmiley2784]

i read just today moning about accoustic cat on reddit. either thats a raly big coincidence, or some one is listening

[@dylanloomis]

Will someone get this man some water?

[@NatalieSpa888]

LOL Jebus is a HIPPY "No part of me would ever be seen alive in sandals"

[@TheRealLink]

Not even 4 min in and ROLLING! Man what a great talk ahahahaha!

[@stellie3553]

For anyone looking to do something like this now, look at the ESP8266. Plenty of RAM and ROM, can work with the Arduino IDE, has Wi-Fi builtin, is small, and costs $2.

[@badlarry172]

don't know how i got here but i'm glad i did

[@andreassjoberg3145]

My first though at the beginning: what does he mean with Pet ? - animals or old Commodore machines.. :P

[@snarevox]

how does "collecting every 30 sec last 4 hours" translate into "collecting every 10 min lasting 8 hours"?? it sounds to me like 8 hours is max duration and collecting every 60 seconds will probably give you 8 hours aswell. if that makes any sense.

[@MagickFireWolf]

Is there a materials list and instruction sheet for making the DoS Dog device?

[@ahmedmusaad]

Watching this for the 5th time :)

[@chillbaby2x]

2023 checking in, 2 WEP networks on my block.

[@JoshHopkinsYT]

These are good. There always seems to be a loud person talking to the speaker tho

[@wolf1066]

I laughed so hard at this! Absolute magic! Great ideas, great speaker. Still don't get why so many people in the States say "sodder" rather than soLder, though.

[@smugmode]

People pronounce it differently elsewhere?

[@SuperChoronzon]

@@smugmode Yeah, in the rest of the English-speaking world we actually pronounce the "l"...shocker, eh ;o)

[@Studio23Media]

Dobermans actually make great service dogs.

[@Jrez]

I love soldering! I suck at computers though. I just like building.

[@mbunds]

Bravo, thank you!

[@wasdeasde6909]

This is a wonderful and entertaining presentation.

[@gsilva220]

Late 2013, as a graduation project, I made a small GPS tracker that got coordinates and sent them through an SMS message formatted as a google maps link. If you had a smartphone you just had to touch the link and a google maps page would open and show you a map with one of those little pegs on it to show the location. The libraries were really obnoxious at the time, so I ended up coding the entire thing without any libraries. Decoding the NMEA string was the most awesome thing, because the arduino platform can't deal with real double precision, so I had to separate the integer and decimal part of the coordinates and then convert and format it. I got a 9/10 score because, although my project was the only one that worked properly (no libraries), the teachers knew i procrastinated to such a degree that i not only had the prototype ready before doing any documentation only 15 days before the presentation, I also procrastinated a little more so that I started making the research for the documentation 7 days before the presentation.

[@H2CO3Szifon]

If you use "raw" AVR libc functions instead of the "nice" Arduino software, it takes up like 1/10th of the space. For some reason (I smell unnecessary abstraction), the Arduino libraries are just so bloated that it isn't even funny.

[@freeNode5]

most fun talk ever!

[@feelinghealingfrequences7179]

WOW brilliant and funny presentation

[@johnredberg]

I was gonna write "this guy is the Louis CK of information security", but he's so brilliant I'm wondering if it's more adequate to say "Louis CK is the 'this guy' of comedy."

[@samuelrenteria8680]

showmanship/10

[@ramixnudles7958]

The stage lighting looks like a Disney leopard in silhouette.

[@barryjreid]

Awesome talk! Come on DEFCONConference give us some more! :)

[@Studio23Media]

How socially unaware do you have to be to interrupt a talk for a toast? Wait until the end.

[@computerfis]

Could be cool if he had a heartbeat detector on. So he could see when the kitty was stressed and stuff, maybe a version 2 ;) . But anyway really cool (:

[@KENSEICHR1S]

Amazing talk!

[@unowild]

Nov. 24th. Today this video has no audio, what happened?