DEFINING LOVE FOR YOURSELF + SOUL CONTRACTS: WITH CLEO WADE

[@accordingtodaye]

This really has spoken to me. I have been back in my hometown for almost 7-years. I moved back to my hometown from Los Angeles after things werent working out. I remeber my stepdad and mom crying for me not to go back to L.A because I was struggaling, while my dad told me, if you come back home, it's going to be ten times harder for you to leave.... he was right. After coming back in 2017, my great grandmother got sick in 2018 and I hellped take care of her alongside my mom and grandmother. When my great grandmother passed, it was so much destruction and chaos and just a mess, like I was the mediater, trying to hold everything togther. I moved in with my grandmother in 2019, because I needed to gdet out of my living situation and she was still greiving the loss of her mom. i have been living with my grandmother for the last 4-years, I am 29-years old now and will be 30 in 202 and I have been struggaling so bad over these 4-years. being everything to everyone else and nothing to myself. i HELPED my brother get though college, which he is finishing up next month, but so much too the point i was not saving, and now i JUST RECENTLY LOST MY JOB, MY car went down last year, due to allowing and lettting my grandmother drive it when it was on its last leg and now I have nothing. No car, no job, dont have my own place and i HAVE BEEN trying so hard to change. I know everyone looks at me, for a certain version of myself een though I am trying to change. I dont know what to do. I ma so tired.