Devout Mormon Couple Leaves Church - Clare and Jackson Adams | Ep. 1981

[@SpencerFieldingSmith]

The Adams. Yet another stunning example of the absolute sincerity, integrity and quality of people manipulated and duped by mormonism and then leaving it. This is who we are. Exmormons are easily the finest people I have ever met and I am privileged to be in their company.

[@HeroMan380]

Isn’t it funny how the church used to tell us these people were the complete opposite? Glad to be out

[@LauraOttawa]

I'm glad they're so young and they have time to do what they truly want to do in life 🙏🏻

[@elizabethmoss9026]

I literally never, ever comment on videos and I don't have any social media accounts. You, Clare and Jackson, may never see this but I cannot even begin to tell you how much of your story I relate to. My husband and I went through similar challenges in our marriage and the adjustment to motherhood was massively challenging for me. THANK YOU for being so vulnerable and brave.

[@clareadams4897]

Thanks for this comment. Appreciate you and sending love, understanding and support to you ❤

[@jon952]

Clare's experience of sudden mental health improvements so quickly after losing her faith is wonderfully familiar. When life in the church became so painful that I couldn't take it anymore and lost my faith, the improvement of my life was almost instantaneous. Some long standing mental health/quality of life problems vanished, like they said, overnight. I felt like me again for the first time in almost a decade, and it was a more poignant event than any "spiritual" experience I ever had as a member.

[@λιμινιλ]

100%!

[@shelleyrobinson4134]

Thank you for your courage in sharing! Your authenticity and integrity, as well as the pain you went through is so clearly articulated. You are helping!

[@clareadams4897]

Thank you so much!

[@chrewtransformation]

Mormon Stories at its finest. Thanks to Clare and Jackson for being brave enough to share ❤

[@jacksonadams1031]

🙏

[@jlarchigirl]

As someone who grew up in Davis county I totally agree with what she said. I feel the amount of perfectionism was extremely high. Still to this day I can point out woman who are from Davis County. Perfect clothes, perfect hair, perfect everything. It was really bad.

[@dianethulin1700]

My family founded Farmington and Kaysville. I always think of them as being a little crazy in Davis County

[@JIKOKALOL]

The Stepford Wives!

[@melodypink1521]

The newest trend about Mormon women… hair extensions & eye lashes 😂😂😂

[@melodypink1521]

I’ve always thought the opposite. They all look the same, very little was perfect, mostly just thrown together, sleeveless dresses with white tees understand, no matter the season…

[@beckyburnett8641]

I did not grow up in Davis County but we relocated here and not being a member any longer, I feel like a fish out of water. Most don't know we were ever members but still neighbors want nothing to do with us. Sad.

[@kristinenelson990]

The body keeps the score. You can see in these two wonderful young people's eyes the trauma they've been through. As a former Mormon, I'm so grateful for these stories. This young generation seeking truth will forge ahead and make a huge difference for others with their courage. I loved this couple. ❤

[@willowtree4]

I learned the truth last year as well. These interviews really help me. Thanks so much. 💕So glad I took the red pill too.

[@mindsamazing9179]

Thanks for being so brave and sharing your story! These are so helpful even 1.5 years after leaving 🙏

[@trishawilkins9375]

Always great to hear stories that are different and yet relate to so much. Thank you

[@dannylarsen4290]

When I left the church 15 years ago, I realized it was God who was leading me out. My life has been blessed without religion and having only a personal relationship with Him.

[@SuzySylvania]

That is a beautiful way to look at this process! I had an epiphany right before the shelf came crashing down. I was born into a non-religious family but my extended family belong to different Protestant religions. They are amazing people. Maybe I was never meant to be a hyper religious person (we joined when I was 9). Maybe my DNA is the reason I have never been able to do the list of “must do” Mormon checkmarks. Maybe my ancestors (or God) are rooting for me to leave so I can be who I was actually born to become!

[@HeatherRiosArte]

I don't know if I still believe in "God" but sometimes I feel like "the Universe" is speaking to me. Not in a "voice" of course, but more like an urging for me to follow truth and logic wherever it might lead me.

[@CJJonesLO]

This comment is a blessing to read. Unfortunately it seems that once the majority of people wake up from the deception that is the LDS organization, they have no spiritual foundation or relationship with God. Seek Him and you will find Him. Coming out of Mormon deception is a long journey to undo the lies and find the truth. I pray for all Mormons daily that God will remove the scales from their eyes and deliver them from the bondage they are in.

[@Lu-LadyBug]

My favorite podcasts! Those that leave!!!! 🎉

[@VickiOlson-mm8ul]

This is probably one of my favorite Mormon Stories episodes. Perhaps it has something to do with the timing, but it has really touched my heart. Thank you to the Adams' for their story and the way it has made me feel. Please thank them on my behalf. They are incredible for their inspirational stories! And thank you to John and Margie for being the most amazing hosts. I love when margie is on and shares her amazing insights as well! Best wishes to all!

[@clareadams4897]

Thank you for this sweet comment 🤍

[@bodytrainer1crane730]

I can't count the amount of times I was inspired by this podcast. Thank you.

[@trevanon7450]

1981 times?

[@queenbee18183]

I can really relate to their story. Thanks for sharing.

[@MerryAdams-l9z]

Thate my brother. So proud 🙌🏻

[@jacksonadams1031]

Love you sis

[@tn767]

You should be proud. He is a healthy, smart, normal man. So glad he found the truth!!!

[@shelleyrobinson4134]

I'm relating to sooo much of this! ICD, intrusive thoughts, fear of hurting someone, (I still hide my knives)...fear that my prayers arent right/good enough. A high demand religion is so triggering. I've done better since i left Mormonism 25 years ago.

[@walkinonsunshin2679]

LOVE Love love seeing lifetime struggles, sacrifices & shelf-breaks experienced by DUPED & DECEIVED Faithful TBM ordinary members like ourselves! Much Thanks!

[@TheeOldest]

Your story is so moving and helpful to hear. Thank you ❤

[@lclass003]

You two have such a powerful story. Thank you for sharing so deeply.

[@scottcaldwell89]

Wow thank you for your honesty this is so refreshing to hear.

[@yoannadavila5539]

Gracias por ser tan valientes. ❤ Espero en que algún momento mormon stories llegue a más personas en latinoamerica.

[@jacksonadams1031]

Hola amiga, mucho amor desde los estados unidos!

[@yoannadavila5539]

​​@@jacksonadams1031gracias por responder... yo en estos momentos estoy navegando por mucho dolor, no es fácil saber la verdad desde hace un año tener un hijo en la misión en Utah y mi esposo creyente de la Iglesia. Ojalá pudiera contar mi historia.

[@knan75]

Such a likable couple! Enjoyed hearing their stories.

[@lesliholtguerrero3054]

Gosh, at its core, the Mormon church requires works to play in their game. May this couple fill love and grace and freedom.

[@kimberlyewell]

What a great conversation. Thanks to each of you. ❤

[@greg-op2jh]

Amazing as always. Just finished . Love y'all. Such a beautiful couple ❤ power to survivors

[@merrikwright19]

Great story, thanks for sharing!

[@kimberlythomas4373]

I had panic attacks on my mission as well. I thought I was dying. And what’s worse is the first one happened when I was giving a talk in a student ward. I stood there with sweat running down my face and forgot why I was up there. It was horrific This was early 90s, Utah Provo Mission, Cedar City Campus. It was STILL one of the best things I did in my life.

[@johnlinton315]

Former Centervillian and Viewmont Alumni checking in to say you make me proud! Having spent 7 years at BYU and 4 years in Saratoga Springs, my experience is that North Salt Lake - Bountiful - Centerville - Farmington - Kaysville is more intensely Mormon than UT Co.

[@31Blawson]

Hi Clare! So crazy! I am no longer a practicing member of the church but my family is devout. You were my older sister's companion in Atlanta in 2017 I believe. I sung the song she showed you "Someone He Can Count On" from the youth church album during the years you served. There are a few stories in there that I remember from my sister's emails and remember your face and photos. You were and are still her favorite companion from her mission. I remember you sending a video/voice memo home of you two singing the "Miracles Happen" from the Princess Diaries. You are so brave. I am not in a place where I am comfortable enough to talk out against what my family still holds dear and believes in, so thank you.

[@jillhughes9009]

Thank you for ypur story! Leaving Christian religion has been the biggest weight off my shoulders, none of us KNOW anything for sure-- I relax in that

[@nickberg5294]

I relate well to the experiences of this couple, as they reflect my own as an adolescent all the way to my early 30s. Anxiety/OCD is something I've dealt with for as long as I can remember.

[@HeatherRiosArte]

I'm a never Mormon, but I relate so much to ex Mormons! My Church was extremely evangelical (I was a missionary for years and was preparing to permanently move to Turkey). We did tons of preaching, door-to-door stuff. I married at age 20 to a man I barely knew (and yes we "waited til marriage") 4 pregnancies and 3 kids by age 25. We had actual church classes and programs for women about how to be a good housewife (it was called "Apples of Gold"). We were taught that divorce is always wrong, even for abuse or adultery. The only real difference I can think of between my experience and the Mormon experience is Joseph Smith, of course. But the rest is so similar. In factI feel that Mormons are more relatable to me as an ex evangelical fundamentalist than other "mainstream" Christian groups.

[@lincolnnumbers6170]

I went to school with Clare! She’s the coolest!!

[@clareadams4897]

@lincolnnumbers I appreciate the support!

[@Maryfs1]

Beautiful story

[@chrewtransformation]

02:42:57 Serious props to you both for remaining so calm about being manipulated and abused by a corrupt corp that has literally been fined for being illegally deceitful. If I ever get chosen to share my Mormon story, there's no way I will be this chill about it 😅

[@bodytrainer1crane730]

Flawless interviewing Margi and John!

[@jacksonadams1031]

for real though. it's an art

[@alishabee369]

😁very cool the truth prevails

[@altavanderwesthuizen1472]

MARGI !!!!!!!! STUNNING ❤

[@TheSaintelias]

Church has to tell you and make you think you’re broken. So they can claim to have the solution. Yet the solution can never work or you will stop needing religion.

[@dustyrose9729]

Clare, you are a young exmormon and I'm an old always atheist and your description of your anxiety and OCD was almost identical to mine: intrusive thoughts about hurting people, pushing hard on cupboards etc. til it hurt for a safety guarantee, health anxiety, ESPECIALLY THE CANCER ONE. Right there with you, I understand. OCD is an exhausting defense mechanism. I was a carrot person too, actually addicted and turned orange, 25 pounds a week for years! Psych meds saved me along with therapy.

[@dustyrose9729]

I'm an always atheist and love Mormon Stories Podcast because the lessons learned, the stories shared are universal and applicable to anyone. Just different shades of the same color.

[@AnnBowers-yw3yw]

So glad I was raised by Methodist. Mom gave us “all you ever wanted to know about sex, but were afraid to ask” when we started junior high. This was in the early seventies.

[@erinrametta1]

Thanks!

[@LifeAfterBelief]

3:03:44 “How bout that tree” Margi! 😂 Funny thing is, I relate. So many little things become awe inspiring!

[@erinrobinson6436]

I'm glad the beard is back, I liked it.

[@jon952]

@@erinrobinson6436 amen

[@annie5024]

I don’t understand the churches obsession with masturbation and pornography. I do it, my husband does it. We don’t hide it. We don’t shame each other or guilt one another. It’s a totally normal natural thing. I don’t get why it’s something a married couple has to “work thru”

[@HeroMan380]

Cool! I like seeing the story of younger couples

[@user-mn447]

My husband’s aunt lives in centerville, and she always says she lives in the celestial kingdom.

[@trishawilkins9375]

Thanks!

[@sallyostling]

I missed the live stream. I was listening to Shari Frankes book. I know it is a long shot, but her book was really good. It would be so nice if she came on to talk about it. I raised three young men in a non religious way. I never once spoke to them about masturbation. They got "the talk" about the birds and bees by their Dad, and I was absolutely neutral regarding sex. Just be safe. Emotionally and health wise. I intellectually knew having boys meant masturbation was part of the package. And none of my business.

[@tamicox990]

When I was disfellowshipped I wasn’t allowed to do anything EXCEPT pay tithing. I got married, was raising my children etc during that time but they kept me disfellowshipped for almost an entire decade

[@IBNED]

Ongoing issues....usually it only last for a year 'unless' you were in senior leadership

[@TheYellowRoseOfTexas]

The part where you men were talking about how we imagine as we leave the church that everyone’s going to be thrilled about our findings and would join us in a mass exodus resonates so much with me. 😂😢 funny and sad I really enjoyed your story. cheers to all fellow truth seekers

[@JIKOKALOL]

I tell my wife that people leave and change churches all the time, not a big deal!

[@HeatherRiosArte]

I went through SEVERE religious OCD/scrupulosity from age 15 to 25. There were so many Bible verses that were at the root of it (because I sincerely believed the Bible 100%) I actually was convinced that every person that I didn't try to "preach the gospel" to-- if they died and went to hell it was my fault. And even though evangelicals are supposed to believe that we are "saved by grace through faith" there were so many other verses that contradicted that. So I basically lived in fear 24/7 that I was going to "fall away" from grace or that I wasn't doing enough to convert people. So yes, constant praying, never having fun with kids my age because I felt guilty for having fun when people were out there dying without Jesus 😐 I also obsessed over reading and studying the Bible, (over 100 times at least!) And had entire chapters memorized. And of course I also truly thought God would speak to me a lot. Which often ruined my life (for example, I married someone I barely knew bc I thought that what who God wanted me to marry). When I finally left and finally was able to deconstruct and became an atheist, it was like being freed from a horrible prison. I don't have any OCD symptoms now at all. (So Im not totally sure if I truly had OCD). But it's really hard to explain to someone what it feels like to believe your eternal soul and the souls of so many people are totally on your shoulders. It's absolutely absurd to me now, but back then, it was my constant horrible reality 😢

[@lidonewyork670]

I was not brought up with any religion and I am SHOCKED about the masterbation shame and confession aspect just GOBSMACKED what the heck does this really still go on? How can that be so??? That is so so so wrong. Hard to believe this!!

[@lisagrace6471]

aw man. So interesting to here an outsider's perspective. Helps for those of us still working through what we were heavily taught.

[@rozannmoake8146]

Question… how can we healthily talk to our kids about masturbating and pornography? I never tried either one until I was like 38 years old and I’m really unsure about what is actually healthy in this area. 55:10 I love what he says that you could say to your child. I’m just still trying to wrap my mind around what is actually ok and when. And I’m sure that, unlike what the church says, this isn’t a strictly black and white issue.

[@trevanon7450]

Look up the episodes titled A More Effective Approach to Masturbation and Pornography with Natasha Helfer Parker

[@jacksonadams1031]

I would highly suggest looking at episodes that MS has done around sexual scrupulosity. Anything with Natasha Helfer.

[@BrianWaller-qe7gr]

The best time is at puberty since our bodies change at that time. Usually at that time they are old enough to understand. Most people in the church want to pretend like this part in their kids lives doesn’t exist.

[@rozannmoake8146]

@ I feel like it’s hard to know when that starts because it’s small changes until it’s there.

[@janetbucknell592]

I have noted, many times with your podcasts, that most ex-Mos (hosts, guests, commenters) use the phrase "lost my faith/belief/religion" along with the verb "deconstructed " thrown hither and yon. This negative phrasing to describe your spiritual awakening confuses me. You have lost nothing. You have set out on a path to FIND your true spirituality. You have taken pivotal personal action. You have rejected the unfounded historicity of LDS, the ritualistic clothing, the (let's face it) strange handshakes, secret vows, the wildly outrageous concept and requirements for baptism of the dead, etc., etc. All those Mormon teachings that make all of us NeverMos shake our heads in disbelief. Depending on your parents' views and your family dynamic, you may feel that you have lost or have come close to losing your family. The same can be true of friendships, social circles, and you certainly must have concerns about the impact this could have on your children. These do not necessarily have to be permanent "losses", but rather opportunities to discover those who truly love you. I hope you might have, amongst yourselves, consultations about what I find to be very negative phrasing to describe what is, after all, one of the best decisions you have ever made for your future spiritual health. That is no loss.

[@lisagrace6471]

THANK YOU! I love this! I gained the opportunity to connect with myself and think for myself and connect with the divine in a way that works for me and is personal to me. I gained an ability to not feel so guilty and feel more normal. I gained an ability to relax as a parent and a spouse a little more. I gained the ability to get along with many more people and increasingly find a small circle of people who actually fit my needs and interests and vice versa rather than everyone doing things in order to be a good person- people I actually get along with and have a true, genuine interest in getting to know. Anyway, love the reminder about the language and phrasing. I experienced God's (insert whatever word you want there) love way more when I left the church.

[@trishawilkins9375]

My mission in Venezuela was traumatizing. Saw kids kidnapped by army. I saw a man murdered. I drove on buses with men and automatic rifles. I was blind to the danger bc the “lord” protected me but my body kept a record

[@beckyburnett8641]

Why are they still knocking on doors? It is not safe at all. Also, most people are not home during the day and are super annoyed if people knock at night.

[@jacksonadams1031]

Nothing about missions are safe. But indoctrinating kids (namely the missionaries themselves), is more important to the so called church than safety. Period. That's why children are allowed to be alone in a room with the bishop. That's why the murder capital of the world gets missionaries. I didn't even share 2% of the stories around my mission. The sisters were basically constantly in danger in my mission.

[@annie5024]

They mention a podcast by “Britt”, what podcast is this?

[@sherryg1838]

No Nonsense Spirituality-Britt Hartley. She was on Mormon Stories a couple of times.

[@trishawilkins9375]

My MTC branch president interviewed me and spent the entire time talking about sex and how I should be for my husband. Most uncomfortable experience with an adult. First time talking about sex with an adult

[@LauraOttawa]

Margie read my mind when she said "That reminds me of Heretic"!

[@tn767]

Have you ever heard that porn as a couple can be very sexual? I don’t know if it’s tabu. I’m old so I don’t know what today’s porn is like, but 40 years ago it could be fun to watch as a couple.

[@7heron]

Is porn a big deal even amongst those who have left the church? Is masturbation ok and sometimes even healthy but pornography strictly off limits?

[@lidonewyork670]

Can that even really be legal for a child to discuss masturbating with an adult not even their parent??

[@workofheartllc]

Being raised mainstream Mormon can honestly lay a good foundation of morale etc. But being raised fundamentalist in a polygamy family would be another thing.

[@jengenx7729]

So sad Jackson that you could not enjoy your coming of age as you progress to having consensual sex. What should be celebrated as a joyful meaningful time, you were privately and publicly shamed.

[@brandonjuber1586]

In some ways Margi is impressive, but her questions ALWAYS direct the person to a negative conclusion about the church. Like when Clare is talking about her anxiety on her mission Margi made sure to frame it in a way that it was the worst anxiety she had ever felt in a way that makes the mission look horrible. She will never focus on the growth that comes from "failure", resources that the church has available for missionaries, feelings of success, learning to become efficient, self-sufficient etc. John certainly has his criticisms, but he also is willing to give Mormonism credit where he thinks it is due.

[@brandonjuber1586]

lol 2 minutes later and John mentions the positive parts . It's a reoccurring theme.

[@chelseydixon6833]

So many words I don’t understand. Cognitive dissonance. I feel stupid watching this. How much therapy have they had? I’m a bit jealous

[@RandJohnson-s9k]

How DEVOUT can they be ?

[@laurenshanahan6652]

They arent anymore … its their journey and who are you to judge….

[@pmp6444]

Maybe actually listen to it and find out…

[@pmp6444]

Who is paying you to monitor this account RAND???

[@Zhaliberty]

Where do you come from?