Divorcing a Narcissist or Borderline? How to Protect Yourself with Bill Eddy

In this very special episode, Susan Guthrie speaks with the leading high conflict divorce expert in the world, Attorney, Mediator and Therapist, Bill Eddy, who recently released the updated version of his seminal book, Splitting: How to Protect Yourself When Divorcing a Narcissist or Borderline, authored with Randi Kreger (Stop Walking on Eggshells).
Are you divorcing someone who is making the process as difficult and drawn out as they possible can? Are they sending you nasty emails, falsifying the truth, putting your children in the middle, abusing you, or abusing the system? Are they “persuasive blamers,” manipulating and fooling court personnel to get them on their side? Then you need the NEW and updated version of Bill Eddy's groundbreaking book, Splitting: How to Protect Yourself When Divorcing a Narcissist or Borderline! Bill returns to Divorce & Beyond to help you understand what you are dealing with and how to best protect yourself, and your children, when caught up in the emotional storm of divorce with a high conflict personality.
Get your copy of Splitting: How to Protect Yourself When Divorcing a Narcissist or Borderline here: amzn.to/3C22aGH
More about this week's very special guest:
Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.
Co-Founder | Chief Innovation Officer
San Diego, California
Bill Eddy is a lawyer, therapist, mediator, best-selling author, co-founder, andAr Chief Innovation Officer of the High Conflict Institute. He pioneered the High Conflict Personality Theory (HCP Theory) and has become an international expert on managing disputes involving high conflict personalities and personality disorders. He provides training to lawyers, judges, mediators, managers, human resource professionals, businesspersons, healthcare administrators, college administrators, homeowners’ association managers, ombudspersons, law enforcement, therapists and others. He has been a speaker and trainer in over 30 U.S. states and 10 countries.
Visit the High Conflict Institute to find out more about Bill, the Institute's wealth of resources for managing high conflict relationships and more of Bill's books! www.highconflictinstitute.com/
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SUSAN GUTHRIE®, ESQ., the creator and host of The Divorce and Beyond® Podcast, is nationally recognized as one of the top family law and divorce mediation attorneys in the country. Susan is a member of the Executive Council of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution and is the Founder of Divorce in a Better Way® which provides a curated selection of resources and information for those facing divorce and other life changes.
Internationally renownded as one of the leading experts in online mediation, Susan created her Learn to Mediate Online® program and has trained more than 18,000 professionals in how to transition their practice online. Susan recently partnered with legal and mediation legend, Forrest "Woody" Mosten to create the Mosten Guthrie Academy which provides gold standard, fully online training for mediation and collaborative professionals at all stages of their career.
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***************************************************************************DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN LEGAL ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM

[@Narcjus]

Why aren't Judges educated in this?

[@ak_zombie]

14 months into defending myself from false allegations from ex wife and the new BF. My biggest struggle has been turning into a gray rock. Adopted children caught in the middle of this mess. I am am over $150k into this and in the verge of being financially ruined. Her attorney is young and doesn’t apply any kind of litmus test to the insane allegations that come with alarming regularity. I refer to her attorney as “Karen Fauci”. Hearing tomorrow for her request for a one year extension of the no contact order she was granted last year despite my attorney proving she lied about nearly everything in her application for a short term protective order. I’m terrified despite not done anything she has accused me of.

[@Madolehag]

Lord have mercy😢 one year later, how’s it going?

[@lynylcullen8370]

HUGE SUPPORT..& MAJOR WEALTH OF INFORMATION!! I’m thankful for you both! Can’t wait to read the latest version!!

[@HoneyBadger80886]

Patterns. Dates, events, patterns. I'm so grateful to be off the Chaos-Merry-go-round . Almost done with the divorce. Only 7 years of court sanctioned abuse. Ty for educating the Legal System...aka Judge.

[@petrastrong7799]

What Tips do you have for those of us dealing with a covert narc? ….besides get out of it calmly, completely, and as soon as you can. My former spouse left us when I succumbed to depression And remains murderously hateful of both me and our kids - for failing his facade!

[@petrastrong7799]

Most esqs are clueless about npd dynamics. Bill - consider introducing a training for esqs.

[@DivorceandBeyond]

Hi Petra, Bill actually spends a great deal of his time training attorneys, judges and the public about managing high conflict people and situations.

[@juliedahl1892]

How many yrs. Of taxes, bank statements, deposits, bills, Check stubs,property taxes.. How far to you go back..

[@harleyfsbo3027]

@12:37 mins - Just because someone remembers abusive events from many years ago does not mean these people have some ‘disorder’ - instead it makes them someone with a good memory and enough self-respect left to refuse to be gaslit by Narcissists into ‘forgetting’ those abuses ever happened. Narcissists don’t acknowledge they did something wrong or hurtful much less apologize for the wrong or hurtful thing they did. They either keep dismissing, brushing aside or belittling the hurt and damage they caused or they want to quickly get over it and move on without allowing deliberating on what they did or allowing the victim to judge the sincerity of the ‘apology’ because their ‘apology’ is never sincere. It is always ‘cosmetic’ and meant to either deflect attention from them or do some quick ‘damage control’ to preserve the facade of them being the ‘nice person’ (they are not) because how they ‘appear’ to the world means everything to them whereas what lurks behind that ‘facade’ means nothing to them.

[@lakshmi5538]

Grateful for all the information. Does judges look into the case history before meeting? As it is important for judge to know what is happening before the actual meeting for fair judgement

[@Pjayysan]

I honestly feel like they don't.

[@rekhagandhi9150]

How can I contact you Bill. Need vonsulatation. Your podcast is wonderful.